Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan
by wicked-oni
Summary: Nearly a decade has passed since the Shikon No Tama was split. After a violent, nearly fatal battle with Naraku, Sesshoumaru is left to ponder the value of keeping a weak, young human woman at his side. Primarily SessRin (some angst!); some InuyashaKagome
1. Prelude

**Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan…A Moment Lost Forever  
Wicked-Oni**

**Prelude**

Rin came awake abruptly, disoriented and cold, and reached up to soothe the dull, throbbing ache in her temple. Crickets had begun their evening song, proving many long hours had passed since she collapsed on this spot in the early dawn.

Bleary eyed, exhausted, and suffering from injuries too numerous to count, she waited a few seconds for her dizziness to fade before shifting her anxious gaze around the clearing to locate her master. Her eyes quickly passed over and disregarded the snoring form of Jaken, and then traveled across a massive moving shadow that could only be the foraging Aun. Just as she was beginning to feel the first stirrings of panic, the object of her nervous search suddenly came into focus a short distance away.

She could only see his face in profile. His long hair cast surreal shadows on his crimson-marked cheekbones, as he silently regarded the rising moon. Her momentary relief at knowing he was close at hand passed, replaced by quiet dread, when she took note of his cold, pained expression.

"You are awake…" he growled.

Sesshoumaru did not turn, he had no need. His enhanced youkai senses had already picked up on the steady rise in her heart's tempo, and the subtle rustle of silk as the girl stirred. He kept his amber eyes firmly fixed on the night sky and silently continued his brooding.

"My lord…dono," Rin whispered, staggering to her unsteady feet and taking a cautious step in his direction. A sharp, and not entirely unexpected, pain shot across the nerves in her leg. Gingerly, she prodded at a tear in her short kimono and winced as her fingers came away tinged with the deep red of clotted blood. She struggled to rearrange her ruined clothing, as scattered memories of the previous night's battle had started to re-form themselves in her mind.

Terrified by what she had done, by how she had disgraced him, Rin limped forward and sank to her knees at Sesshoumaru's side. Before she could stop herself, her fingers had laced around the fine fabric of his sleeve, her eyes pleading with him to acknowledge her, to tell her everything was alright…

Her master rounded on her suddenly, eyes narrowed and fixed to where her small fingers dared to grip him. He shrugged out of her grasp as if her touch burned. "Human," he rasped. "You are filthy. You disgust me. Go bathe."

With that Sesshoumaru shifted away again, casting his vacant gaze back up at the cold stars, her presence seemingly forgotten already.

Rin's heart contracted bitterly, too many emotions rolling in her mind to allow her to react with nothing less than blind obedience. She stumbled into the forest, instinctively heading downhill in search of water. Had she been less compliant and turned slower, perhaps, she might have witnessed the small instant of despair and confusion in her master's face…


	2. Chapter 1

**Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan…A Moment Lost Forever**

**

* * *

Chapter 1: Kioku**

* * *

Only when the scent of Rin's blood and the salty tang of her tears had faded from the little clearing, did Sesshoumaru release the rigid stance he'd been forcing himself to hold. As loathe as he was to admit it, last night's skirmish had proved to be a complete disaster.

_If only he hadn't picked up Inuyasha's foul scent_, he railed within his mind. _No_, he quickly amended, cursing himself for his poor judgment, _if only he hadn't picked up and THEN followed Inuyasha's foul scent_…

He shook his fair head, remembering that when he had first become aware of the hanyou's presence, he had wisely thought to ignore it. As usual, he had not been in the mood to deal with his brother or his annoying little band of followers. But then Inuyasha's power had kept on…_changing_. It was surging, then waning, the boy's youki spiking dramatically only to melt away time and time again. Despite his better judgment, he had been intrigued, drawn in by all those strange shifts and cycles; those strange shifts and cycles that could only mean the hanyou's blood was being altered…

And **very** rapidly at that.

Unable to quell his curiosity, he had drawn closer and closer to the source of the scent, soon discovering that the unmistakable swirl of Naraku's jyaki was mingled with his half-brother's own power.

And…_and by then it was too late_…he had found himself caught, trapped in the middle of a furious multi-front battle between nearly all the principle powers with a stake in the completion of the Shikon no Tama.

Slowly, his golden eyes fluttered closed, and he was unable to stop himself from remembering …

* * *

_From all the signs, it appeared that the walking corpse that once held his half-brother's heart had finally betrayed her last secret: she had simply revealed to Naraku the exact night of the hanyou's transformation into his all too vulnerable human form. And with Naraku's fondness for elaborate entrapments, it would seem he could not resist luring the hot-headed half-demon out into full youkai rage. Their violent fight had caused the pathetic fool to sustain horrendous, life-threatening wounds just as the sun dipped behind the horizon. _

Sesshoumaru watched solemnly as the New Moon rose. There was no beauty in the moon on this night; in fact, it was nothing more than a black circle hanging in the sky, all empty and cold. And much like Naraku, or even himself for that matter, this moon offered the hanyou no mercy. It stole Inuyasha's limited powers away in an instant, leaving him with injuries a mere mortal could not hope to survive.

He had ordered Jaken to take Rin ahead on Aun and wait, while he moved in to investigate. There, on the field, he found the regular member's of Inuyasha's motley little party partnered off and fighting Naraku's various Bunshin. The demon-huntress had her hands full, locked in a fierce battle with the boy who was once her brother. Now in his late teens, time had given the boy the physical edge of added height and power, but it appeared his older sister was still more skilled with her weapons. As ever, the monk lingered close at hand to the taijiya, his eyes darting nervously between her battle and the wicked, white-haired demon child that was advancing upon him. The priest struggled to keep lesser youkai from interfering with the woman's fight, unleashing his Kazaana when he could, quickly resealing his cursed hand when a cruel nod from Hakudoushi caused him to be harried by swarms of Saimyoshou. The priest's movements were sluggish, and a fine sheen of sweat clung to his brow, testifying that he had already taken in some of the insect's poison…

The boy, Kohaku, was not the only one to have grown_, Sesshoumaru noted. Watching with mild interest, he shifted out of the way as a particularly a strong blast of kitsune-bi streaked into a small horde of youkai to his the right. Another of Inuyasha's regular companions…_that ever-optimistic, bright-eyed fox. _Besides growing much bigger in stature, it seemed the young kit's abilities had obviously developed as well. Though still primarily based on simple illusions and tricks, his attacks now could inflict more damage then a mere moment's worth of disorientation. At the present, the fox was doing quite well, burning his way through the swarms of mindless demons that seemed to pour out of the mists in an endless tide, trying to fight his way to Inuyasha. _

A frigid gale of wind swirled up abruptly, seeming to come from nowhere and everywhere all at once. Sesshoumaru scowled, narrowing his eyes against the flying debris carried on the wind. Suddenly, he found his forward progress blocked as the lithe form of Kagura glided down before him.

"Hmmm…come to join the fun?" she drawled sweetly. "You know, dear, this is where I'm supposed to stop you, but every once in a while I think my Master could use a nice surprise. Don't you agree?"

Kagura gestured towards a rocky outcropping in open invitation, her long fingers pointing in the very same direction the kitsune had taken. Sesshoumaru's eyes traveled along the path she indicated and, despite the distance and the choking rise of jyaki, he could clearly make out the semi-conscious form of his half-brother. His semi-conscious half-brother who, for the moment, seemed to be somewhat protected by a fading barrier of pink light …

"Go right on ahead, gorgeous," Kagura murmured, guessing his intent. "Yes, my master's really here this time. Of course, you didn't think he could resist being this close to such an amusing spectacle…Kikyo killing Inuyasha? It's been his fantasy since, ohhhh…long before my time."

Despite her soft, seductive tone, Kagura couldn't resist sending a raging blade of wind to whistle past the taiyoukai's ear, bringing her fan up to her face in a poor attempt to conceal her sardonic smile. "Besides, even though I wouldn't mind getting to know **YOU** better…I think my REAL escort is finally about to make his appearance."

At that, a raging green whirlwind burst free from the tree-line, and Sesshoumaru watched as the arrogant ookami-boy plowed onto the field. Kagura vanished with a mocking laugh just as the wolf spun free of his cyclone, his curved claws flashing out to ravage the spot where his prey had stood a mere second before. The demoness reappeared an instant later, performing a simple flip and landing elegantly at least twenty yards to the left.

In that one graceful move, Sesshoumaru observed, the woman had drawn her duel with Kouga away...cleverly...effectively..._clearing all obstacles in his path towards the creature that kept her enslaved. _

Kagura_, he scoffed, rolling the name over and over in his mind. _Such a clever bitch. Always a woman who knew what she wanted. _His last vision of the demoness before charging off in the direction she'd indicated was of her deep crimson irises. They glittered against the darkness, shining like two rubies, lit with equal parts of malice and glee as she began her battle with the enraged wolf-prince. _

Sesshoumaru pressed on, but for the moment, Naraku was nowhere to be seen. But that mattered little. He could feel him, smell him, taste his very presence in the damp air. He did not pause, but bounded directly towards his half-brother's struggling form, temporarily disrupting a surreal confrontation between the two eerily-similar wenches that had followed the pathetic half-breed at one time or another.

Apparently, he mused, the years of watching her reincarnation secure a new claim on the hanyou's heart, had taken their toll on the first woman…the undead miko. _She obviously had serious, justified doubts as to whether Inuyasha would ever have the desire to fulfill his final obligation to their tragic love. Kikyou, it seemed, was taking no chances with the hanyou's oath to follow her to hell and seemed to be _'insisting'_ that she choose the date. _

It would appear, however, that her grand design was somewhat lacking in one small detail: she obviously had forgotten to factor in Kagome. Rather, Kagome and the rather fierce resistance she was currently offering…

After recovering from the initial surprise of Sesshoumaru's unexpected arrival, the two nearly identical women quickly returned their focus back to one another. Kikyou had obviously broken her bow earlier in the fray. She had quickly found ways to compensate for the loss of her weapon, however, and now, in either hand, she brandished arrows that crackled with her power. It would seem she was intent on personally driving them into wounded hanyou's heart...if only she could get past her determined successor. But time and time again Kagome blocked her path, standing so defiantly...stubbornly protecting the dark-haired, human form of Inuyasha. Having no other weapon herself, she was trying to keep Kikyou at bay with the only thing left to her: the Tetsusaiga. The taiyoukai watched in wry amusement as Kagome held the battered, untransformed sword before her in a white knuckled grip, waving it threateningly whenever Kikyou advanced too close.

Sesshoumaru snorted at her sheer grit and impudence. Much like the day he had witnessed the woman unwittingly pull the blade from among the stones in his great Father's tomb, there was no skill behind her actions. Just foolish luck. However, quite unlike that day_, he noted grudgingly, _this time Kagome's hands did not tremble.

He glanced down at Inuyasha just in time to catch the scathing look the hanyou shot back at him. He read the challenge in the boy's dark eyes, imagining that the half-demon's head was ringing with one question and one question alone: Why, why, why is that bastard here?

Inuyasha was currently cradling a bruised and broken arm, pressing it tightly against a gaping wound in his side. Blood ran freely between the seams of his unclawed fingers even as he tried desperately to stop the flow. The taiyoukai smiled.

Truly, Inuyasha was an absolutely helpless fool. Utterly pathetic. _There he was, struggling weakly, using his free hand to cling to the hissing fire-cat that nudged against his side, his only chance at escape. But the two battling priestesses were so close and currently drawing on every ounce of their holy powers, the combined force of which kept causing the great cat to be purified into her weakened form whenever she leapt too close. The neko-youkai growled and lashed her tails in her frustration, helpless to aid the hanyou or the young woman presently defending him. _

Sesshoumaru took one menacing step forward. For the slightest of moments, Kikyou paused to fix him with an appraising glance. Then, with a derisive scowl, she turned, seeming to dismiss him entirely to resume her unhurried stalk towards Inuyasha. Kagome, on the other hand, remained as obstinate as ever; she did not acknowledge him or cry out for aid, though her eyes were pleading and glittered with too many emotions to read.

In that moment, Sesshoumaru moved between the two women and, turning to face Kikyou, raised Toukijin in warning…

"Bitch," he murmured, "You **KNOW** who I am…"

The undead miko fluttered her lashes and offered a mock-genteel bow. Sesshoumaru gave a delicate snort at her audacity and continued on, "As you know who I am, then you know my hatred for that pathetic wretch is as great as yours."

Unconsciously, he clenched the fingers of his re-formed left hand, remembering the indignity of how Inuyasha had once cleaved it off. It had been so humiliating and it had taken years to regenerate the limb. Even after all this time, the skin was nearly as white as his silver mane and the muscles were not quite at their former strength…

"But," Sesshoumaru added swiftly, his eyes never leaving the miko or her holy weapons. "However great my hatred for Inuyasha may be, this Sesshoumaru will not allow him to disgrace my family's legacy anymore than he already has. Inuyasha will not be brought down by a vengeful, jealous corpse, or…" His voice lowered wickedly as he turned to stare into the darkness, seeking the point where the evil jyaki flared strongest. "**ANOTHER** lowly half-breed," he concluded.

At those words, Inuyasha shot him a questioning, yet still typically defiant, look. Kagome gasped, her lips offering him a silent…and wholly unwanted…_thanks. The young miko spun on her heel, taking full advantage of the unexpected rescue, lowering her borrowed weapon and racing to assist her hanyou. Despite it all…despite his injuries, the ache that must have come with the realization of the true depth of Kikyou's hatred, his life and death race against the moon's cycle, and the humiliation of being in debt to older brother…it looked like Inuyasha could barely suppress his weary smirk, obviously beyond grateful that Kagome was safe. _Pathetic_. At least the hanyou seemed to remember some of his strength and dignity, for when his smirk died he turned for a moment, pausing to focus dark, accusing eyes on his former love. _

Kikyou stared back at Inuyasha, her eyes beseeching as Kagome reached his side and tugged frantically at his shoulders to assist him onto Kirara's back. Being in such close proximity with her reincarnation had obviously begun to take it's toll on the undead woman…gray circles had formed under her eyes and the Shinidamachuu were forced to refresh her with new souls at a obviously heightened pace. Now thwarted in her plan, cut off and held at bay rather unexpectedly by Sesshoumaru, it seemed the only weapons left to her were bitter, resentful words.

"You simple, **selfish** fools!" Kikyou ranted, disregarding the cold, imposing demon before her, and alternating her comments between her former lover and the frantic Kagome. "Don't you see? Naraku's so close to completing the jewel! Most of the final pieces are within his grasp! Right NOW! Right on this very field! I am the true guardian of the Shikon no Tama…it is near enough to completion that I can purify it and end that monster's miserable existence! Let me take Inuyasha's soul, he pledged it to me so long ago! Have you forgotten, Inuyasha! Do you not remember **MY** arms around you? How you cried out my name in the night? I gave you pity, when the whole world reviled you! You cannot avenge our deaths; I ALONE have the strength to defeat Naraku. Just let me send you to hell, my love, I will join you soon." With an animalistic growl, she charged towards the retreating pair, only to be blocked and thrown to the earth by the smooth arc of Toukijin.

Kikyou giggled up at him maniacally from the ground, a strange trickle of dust spilling from the corner of her lips. Sesshoumaru winced at the stench of decay. Suddenly, the flow of jyaki shifted and the shadowy form of Naraku materialized just behind the miko's shoulder. The half-demon glowered at him, his hazy red eyes shining malevolently at having his entertainment rudely interrupted…

"So, coward," Sesshoumaru challenged, turning from the downed priestess to gaze fully upon Naraku. At last._ "For once you've actually decided to make an appearance yourself and not send some lowly kugutsu in your stead?" His shifted, quickly glancing back to the retreating forms his injured half-brother and his woman. _Perfect. They had escaped. No screaming little half-breed to get in his way on this night, no one trying to steal the kill that was by all rights his alone. No outlandish little miko with endless sermons of right and wrong. _It would be over soon and Sesshoumaru found he could not resist goading Naraku, drawing out the moment, savoring the sight of that frustrated look on his enemy's face. "All this, Naraku?" he asked. "So disappointing. All this trouble, all this wasted power…just to kill a collared, lovesick pup and a few worthless humans." _

"My dear Lord Sesshoumaru," Naraku cast back in a smooth tone, seeming decidedly unruffled. "Do not be such a hypocrite…it only makes you look even more foolish. After all, when it comes to these human creatures, I believe you take to the leash just as easily…"

The half-demon's soulless eyes danced with unrestrained delight as he turned and gestured to a small, very, very familiar figure that was trying to remain concealed in the shadows of the rocks above.

Annoyed, Sesshoumaru cast a quick glance at the intruder only to gasp aloud.

Standing right above them, crouching in the dust and gravel was…Rin_. _

His breath hitched and he suddenly felt as though all the blood in his veins had turned to ice.

What in all the levels of hell was she doing here?

He had ordered her ahead, to seek safety with Aun and Jaken. Why had she disobeyed him? _Her kimono was torn, she was covered in bruises, and she defiantly clutched a broken yari in bloodied hands. The girl very obviously had to struggle, she obviously HAD to fight, to wade this far onto the battlefield. It proved that she had encountered plenty of reminders of precisely why HE had insisted she stay hidden… _

Yet still she came. Despite his command, she had come to see what would befall him, to foolishly try to help if she could.

Rin cringed at being discovered. In the next instant, however, she had turned to meet his sharp gaze, every emotion in her sentimental human heart clearly written on her face. Adoration, relief, devotion…love. 

There, undisguised, and in plain view of his most bitter enemy.

Wisely, Rin remained frozen in place, but her position, unfortunately, was much closer to Naraku's than to his own. Sesshoumaru felt a building tightness in his chest that was suspiciously close to his heart.

The sick half-demon had but to extend one of his powerfully armored claws, and the small, frail human girl he had nurtured for nearly a decade would be torn to pieces right before his golden eyes.

"Ahhh," Naraku sneered maliciously, taking his time with his words and allowing the tension to build. "These Inu-youkai…so easy to tame. Show them the slightest kindness and they roll on their backs! Just like a starving village mongrel begging for scraps of food!"

Sesshoumaru could not argue.

He could only stare.

And Rin could only shake her head in silent apology.

At that moment, Kikyou picked herself up from the rocky ground and released another round of mocking laughter, alternating her piercing gaze between the young girl and the two demons. "I will take my leave now, Naraku," she commented smoothly. "My purpose for enduring your foul presence has fled, just like the cringing dog I have always suspected him to be." She stared after Kirara's fiery trail in the distant sky, her eyes strangely unfocused, lost and sad. "Besides," the miko whispered. "I have no wish to watch you destroy another hopeless young fool who's been manipulated by these monsters. Another stupid little girl taken in by deceit and the fantasy of finding emotion in a youkai's black heart!" Her mouth twisted in a bitter smile, and she swept her heavy hair dark over her shoulder and brushed at the dirt collected at the corner of her lips. "Do not waste your time forming new plans and schemes…your days are precious and few and I will be returning to kill you very, very soon, Onigumo." That promise made, she collected what remained her arrows and her broken bow, and turned, striding silently away.

Naraku favored Kikyou with a curt nod as the miko moved off into the night, pursued by the ghostly glow of Shinidamachuu. "Onigumo, hmmm!" he called out after her. "Well, that fool was only right about one thing, my Kikyou…you ARE beautiful in your helplessness and sorrow. I can only imagine that the other girl is cradling Inuyasha in her arms right now…just as you once did! I wonder…do you think the wretch will survive the night!" He heaved a bored sigh and twirled a long tendril of curling black hair around a tapered finger.

Kikyou paused, her spine stiff and her hands shaking at her sides. But she gave no answer to the half-demon's cruel question and, after a moment, merely resumed her slow march, fading into the mist.

Laughing, Naraku promptly forgot the miko, free now to direct all of his awareness squarely on the silent taiyoukai standing before him. "Well, Lord Sesshoumaru, where were we?" he questioned. "Oh yes, you and I alone at last…with yet another of these worthless humans',_ as I believe you called them?" _

Sesshoumaru blinked in surprise, trying to re-focus from his virtual stupor. During the short verbal sparring between the undead priestess and her original murderer, he had found he could not take his eyes from Rin. The girl was staring back at him just as steadily, her hazel eyes wide with confusion, a desperate plea for forgiveness clearly defined within their depths.

Sesshoumaru found himself taking the smallest step back. Here he was under a direct challenge from Naraku, and yet could not concentrate on anything but that strange, unfamiliar knot that kept building within his chest. He was torn with indecision and for the only the second time in his long life felt…

Absolutely helpless.

To walk away now would be to condemn Rin to certain death. However, should he attempt to come to her aid, everything in his life would be a lie. She had NOT been abducted this time. She was NOT a pawn. She had come of her own free will, against his very command.

On this occasion, he could not justify his rescuing her as simple 'revenge' on Naraku for attempting to manipulate him, as he always had in the past. To save Rin now, to risk unnecessary injury to himself, would prove that he held her in some regard. It would prove, beyond the shadow of a doubt, that he valued her.

Naraku inclined his head this way and that, appraising Rin's trembling form, running his hand through the air as if tracing the teasing curves of the girl's silhouette. "Ah, yes…the little brat all grown up. Delicious body, a bit short, perhaps, but a surprisingly lovely face…for a human, that is. Not too bright though, I suppose, to make her way out here," he mused conversationally. "Don't you agree, my lord?"

Sesshoumaru found he couldn't have answered, even if he wanted to.

His thoughts were still scattered…to rise to Naraku's baiting, to offer protection to this slip of a woman-child after she had deliberately placed herself in harm's way…just where the hell was Aun?_ He could understand Jaken losing track of the girl, after all, she outwitted the small toad all the time…but… _

With only an evil smirk as warning, Naraku's form had changed, with countless appendages erupting from beneath his baboon pelt to rush out towards Rin. The girl screamed, and attempted to dodge, but…but she stood no chance. In the next instant, she was born down to the hard ground. Her high-pitched shriek choked off to a rasp as she flailed helplessly against Naraku's heavy weight. The sounds of her struggles died quickly, replaced by the sound of the half-demon's deep, distinctive cackle.

Sesshoumaru reacted instantly, his decision born of blind instinct. He dove after his enemy, delivering a vicious slash from Toukijin that was quickly followed by a blow from his acid whip. Within seconds, he, too, had been surrounded in the twisted coils of Naraku's grossly mutated form, just a rolling, shifting mass of mismatched parts cannibalized from less-powerful demons.

Sesshoumaru cursed. At this close range, it was nearly impossible to know just which attack would come next. Claws were followed by stingers, then horns that tried to gore him, and tentacles that sought his throat. Dimly, he felt something catch in his side. He heard the tear of silk and skin, and then a shrill burst of sound that could only be another scream from Rin. His nose was assaulted by the scent of scorched flesh…his own.

Burning!_ Sesshoumaru scoffed, grimacing against the unexpected pain. _Why was it burning!_ He had been surrounded in Naraku's foul mass before…_what was different this time? The Shikon No Tama nearly complete, but surely, he couldn't have underestimated the power it granted this depraved hanyou?

No_, he realized. The Jewel of Four Souls held no sway over him. In Naraku's evil hands, it had no ability to purify youki. Especially youki as great and powerful as his own. In confusion, he reached for Tenseiga, only to find the sword and his fine sash had been torn away in that last assault, his torso raw and bleeding. Sesshoumaru brought his hand up in pure shock, and, for the first time in many long years, stared at claws stained in his own dark blood. _How ironic_, he mused feeling no small measure of annoyance. _To have dismissed the Tenseiga as weak and useless for so long only to be reminded of its true value too late.

But he was a taiyoukai. He had other weapons. He would not be brought down like this.

Sesshoumaru's youki began to rise, building along with his outrage. His eyes blurred to an unholy crimson and angry red pigment flooded through his skin, elongating the stripes on his cheekbones and wrists. It was a clear sign, an obvious warning to any foe that the fight had become deadly serious.

Another cry from his young ward suddenly assailed his ears, causing him to momentarily pause before his full transformation. Squinting through the smoke, he sought Rin out, finding her as she was lifted up through the dim shadows, caught fast in Naraku's rank hold. He could smell her fear, just as he could smell her coppery tang of her blood. She was…she was absolutely terrified.

But not for herself_, he realized…_it was only for him_. The look in her sorrowful hazel eyes told him everything, her emotions as clear and easy to read as any spoken declaration. _

And he saw…she was…she was in such agony, too. Rin was writhing in pain, and there was a strange white energy crackling about her hands…energy crackling around small hands that struggled to hold…the Tenseiga! _She could not shield herself from its great power; it burned her, even through the layers of cloth she had attempted to lace around her fingers for protection. _

"How very sweet!" Naraku shouted sarcastically from somewhere high above. "What do you think, Sesshoumaru-sama, shall I put her out of her misery? It would be the kindest, the most merciful thing after all! A little **LATE** to restore your dignity, perhaps, but at least it would end her suffering!"

With a defiant cry, Rin hurled the sword she carried towards Sesshoumaru. The throw was clumsy, with the blade seeking to return to its master's hand mostly of its own power. Naraku gave a menacing growl, the noise feral and low in his throat, and then struck the girl across the temple with a twisted limb, knocking her unconscious. Rin gave one last broken sob before falling into a crumpled heap among the sharp rocks.

Sesshoumaru was enraged. At that moment he was not even sure who he hated more: the sick half demon that dared to draw his blood, or the small nothing of a human girl who presumed to interfere with his battles. He ceased his transformation altogether, and refocused his power, sinking Toukijin to the hilt in the foul grey flesh surrounding him. The flesh parted easily under the sword's wickedly honed blade, bathing him with blood and shouki. With no small measure of satisfaction, he twisted his claws into the raw, oozing wound as well, allowing his natural poison to eat through the appendages that held him trapped.

Naraku howled in pain, and released Sesshoumaru so suddenly that he staggered. Glaring through half lidded eyes, the evil hanyou gathered his bulk back into the less threatening form concealed under the baboon's pelt.

As the two opponents continued to glower at each other in hatred, a lone Saimyoshou suddenly appeared. It was wounded and flew dangerously low to the ground, struggling to deliver its news to its master before its death. The unfortunate creature hovered at the half-demon's ear for less than an instant before its wings ceased beating and it fell to the earth with a dry crackle. It was obvious that the brief message it had managed to convey…whatever it was…_did not seem at all pleasing to Naraku at all. _

Sesshoumaru lowered his swords and awaited his enemy's next move.

"Inu no Taisho," Naraku mocked. "I'm afraid we'll have to continue this on another day. I have more pressing matters to attend to now. You understand, of course?" He backed away slowly, his crimson eyes somehow appearing both guarded and intensely amused. "Besides, you'll need some time to patch up that interfering little whelp of yours. Maybe it's time for you to consider finding a more durable creature as a…pet? These humans…so very fragile," he added in an icy whisper.

At those words, the taiyoukai felt an eerie sense of déjà vu. Fragile indeed. Hadn't he once even uttered those same words to Inuyasha long ago?

With a final laugh, Naraku's form faded away, disappearing into a thick cloud of jyaki.

Sesshoumaru released a deep breath, and stole a quick glance at Rin's prone form. The girl groaned weakly in the dust, and then abruptly sat up, her hands flying up to her head. Her nervous eyes immediately met his, and she cringed under the intensity of his stare. Without a word, he marched past her. After a few seconds, he heard the unmistakable sound of her slowly following in his wake. There was drag in her step, as if one of her legs were injured. At the moment, the taiyoukai found he could not bring himself to care, and continued to walk quietly into the night…

* * *

Sesshoumaru squeezed his eyes tighter, just willing the memories away.

_Everything was going to be made right. It was all as he wished it to be. Everything would be fine when he opened his eyes again._

But when he finally opened them again, and stared up at the night sky, he found the world around him seemed no less bleak and miserable then it had the night before.


	3. Chapter 2

**Orginally Posted Feb 2004**

**Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan…A Moment Lost Forever**

**

* * *

**

**Chapter 2: Kuyami **

**

* * *

**

"Damn," Sesshoumaru gritted out, wishing he could force himself to stop reanalyzing these events. _These insignificant details. He could not do this anymore. This simply had to end._ He rose to pace around the clearing, trying unsuccessfully to break away from the tangled memories haunting his mind.

Not for the first time that evening, Sesshoumaru suddenly found himself wondering anew about Chichiue and his delicate second mate, that insolent little beast, Izayoi. He found himself wondering about his pathetic half-brother and his not one, but **TWO** human women…

_Could it be that his whole bloodline infected with this insane perversion for the company of these frail creatures?_

Much to his annoyance, he found himself focusing specifically on brief images of Inuyasha's current human bitch, that bizarre, dim-witted, and very outlandish creature, Kagome. There was no mistaking it; she was always ready and willing to sacrifice her own life for the half-breed's sake. She had been prepared to do so, in fact, from very first unfortunate day he had become aware of her miserable existence back in his Father's Tomb all the way to their very encounter last night! Time and time again, he himself had played witness to her obnoxious bravery, her stubborn foolishness…

He just was never prepared to have someone direct that same unwavering loyalty at himself.

_Not again. Never again._

With a growl, he tried to will the visions away once more…

_Rin. Her tears, her terror, her pretty face so pale and drawn as she struggled to his aid. Her courageous attempt to defy a creature she had absolutely NO hope of defeating… simply because…_

He stopped his own thoughts with a sneer of contempt.

_Pretty? Courageous? Since when did he become a judge of human beauty and character?_

A small voice protesting in the back of his mind reminded him exactly when…

_Eight summers ago_. Eight summers ago, when Rin had first stumbled across his wounded form in the forest.

Sesshoumaru worried his lip with the sharp tip of a fang. He clearly remembered that long ago sunset, when he lay injured and fighting the after-effects of Tetsusaiga's strike, nursing both his bruised body and ego. Alone and in pain, with nothing to do but wrestle with bitter questions of why his father would choose to bestow so powerful a sword and seemingly limitless devotion on a worthless hanyou. He had been so thoroughly absorbed in self-doubt that he didn't even sense the girl's approach until she had accidentally revealed her presence by snapping a dry branch under her heel in the underbrush. He had been absolutely dumbfounded, and remained frozen in mid-attack, completely shocked by the small, cowering figure.

Now he recalled that tiny child, that tiny child that was long gone. In his mind, he saw her undernourished form, and the tattered, outgrown rags that had clung to her frame. With a deepening frown, he also remembered how she gazed upon him with no trace of fear, her warm, hazel eyes shimmering with an equal mix of unbridled curiosity and… and an unmistakable understanding of loneliness.

_Rin's pity_, he sneered. All those years ago he had scoffed it off as an incredible display of human folly and failing. Probably just as he should now.

Unfortunately, now her pity had nearly destroyed everything. His world, his power, and his righteous anger at his brother's tainted blood were all based on one simple rule, the simple belief that clearly placed HER kind as inferior to his own. It became apparent now that over the years, something about her presence had created a softness in him…a bizarre weakness that he could not identify. _What the hell was it? What was eluding him?_

Whatever the answer was, he decided it should not…_did not_…matter.

Sesshoumaru suddenly realized he was up and pacing, and felt a deep welling of disgust at his own nervous behavior. Honestly, it was degrading that he should even lower himself to waste this much time in contemplation! His actions, his decisions, were not subject to censor…not even his own! Only one fact was clear, he reminded himself bitterly: last night, Rin had cost him his dignity.

And, as much as he preferred not to admit it, very nearly his life.

_Gods!_ It seemed only yesterday Rin was a mere child. The taiyoukai remembered her ceaseless chattering, her nonsense songs, her squeals when helping Aun dig up earthworms, her wry, mischievous sense of humor and ever-present ability to irritate Jaken. But, most of all, he remembered her laughter and soft gasps of delight when they came upon flower-filled meadows.

As time passed by and she had grown, however, Rin had become somewhat silent and solemn. Though her eyes had lost none of their warmth and sparkle, her laughter did not ring out as often anymore. Perhaps, he guessed, it was because of the many tragedies she had suffered in her relatively short years. He still knew her to be plagued by night-terrors, mostly from her ordeal with the wolf pack, no doubt. From time to time, Rin would wake up sweating and screaming, her hands lifting to her throat nervously, as if she half expected them to come away raw and bloody. Tenseiga may have healed her body, but some wounds remained deep in her memories, her trauma engraved as permanently in her mind as the angry scars that ran across her pale skin. She would have difficulty returning to sleep after those dreams, sometimes spending hours staring up at the night sky, quietly gliding her fingers across the old injuries from the attack as if they still caused her pain.

_But that couldn't be all._

What brought on an unexplained feeling of dread was the possibility that **HE** was the REAL reason for the change in her persona. It was downright unsettling: the thought that Rin had perhaps adopted this air of reserve, this quiet patience, out of respect for his ways. She had devoted herself to emulating his behavior, and nowadays, a disapproving glance, a small nod, his stance…even the words he chose NOT to say seemed to speak volumes to her. Her warm eyes were always studying him, and more often then not, he'd be surprised to find her correctly interpreting his mood or course of action before he even had a chance to issue a command. The unfamiliar ache burned even more painfully within his chest. His emotions, kept so ordered and controlled, were…_what the hell was happening?_

Rin's eyes on the battlefield…they had been shining with…_love?_

The girl presumed far too much.

After his father's ignoble end and Inuyasha's disgrace…_a demon reduced to spending a half a century sealed to a tree as a result of a human's spell...pathetic! _Sesshoumaru suddenly paused in his thoughts, a deep scowl tugging at his lips. If that was THEIR fate, what would become of **HIM**?

_And why was he still wasting his time, still devoting such energy and concern to the actions of a worthless servant, a lowly ningen animal? Yes_, Sesshoumaru mused, this would all end tonight.

* * *

At that very same moment, Rin's state of mind fared no better than her master's. After limping weak and humiliated from the taiyoukai's side, she had struggled for at least an hour through the undergrowth towards a little stream she vaguely remembered passing the night before.

The stream had proven to be more of a distance from their temporary camp than she remembered. But then again, she reminded herself, her perspective was always altered as the ground that seemed to blur past while clinging to Aun's broad back often translated into miles upon miles upon miles on foot.

After last night's fateful battle, after she and Sesshoumaru-sama had finally reunited with Aun and a very subdued Jaken, they had traveled quickly, much faster than she was usually accustomed to. Rin's muscles still burned with fatigue. _Perhaps the pace had been set to deliberately punish her? Perhaps Sesshoumaru-sama was trying to leave her, just daring her to fall behind?_ It was difficult to say, she reasoned, after all, she had never seen her master this displeased with her.

With a sigh of frustration, Rin snapped herself back into the present. The sound of running water had finally reached her ears and so she quickened her pace. Whatever the situation with her master, she thought idly, whatever her lord's feelings and motives, she truly DID need a bath. She was repugnant…filthy and brown, from the crown of her head to the tips of her bare toes. She held up still shaky hands for closer examination and frowned in deepest disgust. Her fingernails were caked with gore and her skin was altogether layered in a foul coating of dust. "Dust, ash and gods only knows what else," she half-sighed, half-sang aloud. This bath would be no relaxing soak in an onsen, but she couldn't deny that it still would feel wonderful to remove the clotted blood, dirt and gore from her skin. She was an altogether mess and at this point it didn't matter how cold the water was!

She had just reached the well-worn game trail that wound down to the stream when an uncharacteristically loud splash stopped her in her tracks. At the subsequent sound of hushed voices, Rin swiftly dropped to the forest floor in alarm. After the horrors of the preceding night and the uncertainty of what was to come when she returned to Sesshoumaru, she would take no chances. Peeking timidly from a dense screen of ferns, she stole a quick glance at whomever or whatever had caused the disturbance.

The closer look revealed that she was not actually the one being intruded upon. Instead, ironically, the trespasser here was none other than **HERSELF**.

It appeared the little stream had already been claimed by VERY familiar figures. Her lord's half-brother was down there, accompanied by the woman, Kagome, the one she had once known only as 'pretty lady'. The miko and the hanyou stood together, waist deep in water, clinging to one another as they whispered soft promises and gentle declarations she could not hear. Their hands roamed each other's bodies desperately, as if both trying try to reassure themselves that the other was truly there.

Rin's eyes widened in shock. Apparently, she mused, in light of last night's betrayal, Inuyasha's heart was no longer torn, and his decision was finally made.

It seemed that Kagome's care had helped the hanyou survive the night, until his youkai powers were restored and he had reverted back to his true form. Rin found herself staring at the curtain of silvery hair cascading down the half-demon's back, and how Kagome's hands drifted through its softness. The miko's fingers trembled as she abandoned his hair to reach up to stroke his cheek next, as if she were seeking to soothe the worry and tension in his eyes with her touch alone. Soothing the worry and tension from his…_**golden eyes**_, Rin thought bitterly, just as those eyes fluttered shut. She watched on as Inuyasha pressed a hungry kiss into the priestess' palm.

Kagome let out a ragged gasp and then the demon's arms came around to circle her shoulders and waist. He lifted the young woman, molding her tightly to his body as he carried her to the water's edge. He set her down amongst the sedges and feather-soft ferns growing along the river-bank, his hands slowly reaching for the ties of his clothing, his expression at once possessive and pleading.

Kagome, Rin noticed in naïve surprise, seemed to be almost paralyzed at that moment. The strange woman was just laying there, laughing and crying all at once. Then, with a low, needy moan and a sudden snap of furious movement, the miko threw herself against the hanyou, tumbling the somewhat startled demon to ground where they kissed over and over again.

Rin suddenly felt as if all the blood in her body had pooled into her cheeks, and felt truly despicable for nearly disrupting the tender scene, however inadvertently. The emotional moment she witnessed had obviously taken years to build and doubtlessly held plenty of its own drama. Keeping as low to the ground as she could, she backtracked quietly and headed further upstream. She only hoped that the wind would not shift and reveal her presence to the now obviously **QUITE** distracted Inuyasha.

When she finally thought herself to be a safe enough distance away to avoid detection, Rin stopped, dropping down to her knees as she fought to control both her nervous breathing and her bright blush. _What a complete idiot she was! She'd have felt horrible if she'd interrupted them! So that was_, she thought curiously, that was…errr, that soon would be…what Jaken had so haltingly described as…rutting. Rin's cheeks flamed crimson again and her stomach lurched in a peculiar way, as if a cadre of crickets or a fleet of fireflies were loose and fluttering around her belly. Her skin felt hot and oversensitive, and her heart seemed to be beating way too fast. But for some reason she welcomed this new feeling. It was somewhat…_**pleasant**_…especially in the aftermath of all the fear and dread she had experienced over the past few days. To her great disappointment, she found that the new sensation faded far too quickly though, leaving her strangely empty inside.

Rin could do nothing but shrug at this latest loss, the loss of that warm feeling. She hurried to remove her frayed kimono, rushing into the chilly water with a muffled shout. Her bath DID prove to be a thoroughly dismal experience, the cold water tightening her already sore muscles and stinging the bite marks on her leg. Yet still she took her time carefully, allowing the trickling current of the river to wash out those ragged punctures, fervently hoping the variety of oni who sank his fangs into her thigh wasn't poisonous. As an added precaution, after stumbling out of the stream, she wrapped the wound with a particularly pungent water plant that the kind-hearted hanyou, Jinenji, had long ago taught her was a combatant of most toxins.

Rin cringed as she spread the leaves and cooling salve across her leg. The strong medicinal smell of the plant's sap, while not TOO terribly offensive to her, was sure to assault her master's delicate senses. It was yet another thing that would serve to remind him of her human frailty. Just another inconvenience, an annoyance that would help sustain his dark mood when she was finally forced to confront him at camp…

_If there even was a camp to return to?_

Rin sucked in a gasping breath. She couldn't shake the nagging fear that had haunted her most frightening nightmares. Even more horrifying than the memory of wolves, was the thought that one day she would wake…and Sesshoumaru-sama would be gone. That he would vanish and be lost to her forever, having grown tired of whatever temporary amusement he had once derived from her presence, his days of playing protector to a small human girl over without a word of explanation.

_Oh gods, her mind cried out, why hadn't she listened to him?_

Silent tears trailed down her cheeks as she finally allowed her thoughts to wander back to the events of the night before….

* * *

_From her vantage point above the field, Rin peeked out over the battle with morbid curiosity. She had little trouble wrestling control of Aun's reins; the beast was always eager to fight and was more than willing to head back into the fray. Overpowering Jaken had been an even easier a task…she had simply nudged the Nintojyou till it dangled precariously from Aun's saddle, then delivered a well-placed little kick as the toad demon bent to retrieve it. He did not have very far to fall, but still Rin waited to make sure he was alright. As Jaken scrambled to his tiny feet, she offered a sheepish grin of apology in response to the exceptionally vulgar string of curses he screamed up at her. She left him quickly, tugging at the reins and wheeling Aun in the direction she had last seen Sesshoumaru-sama headed. _

Rin knew her master would be furiously angered by her insolence, but her single-minded need to know his fate overruled any fear of displeasing him. She had seen plenty of traps in her lifetime…hell, on more than one occasion **SHE** had been the bait!

And this was most definitely a trap.

Clearly, Naraku had something momentous planned. Swirling and writhing in every direction, there were more demons than she could ever hope to count, and the scent of burning and blood and death was so strong that even her own limited human senses were nearly overwhelmed by it.

In the distance, through layers of choking fog, she suddenly distinguished the form of her master's half-brother and his two mikos. And there, beyond them, she could see that vicious, disgusting wolf-prince, that…that beast, Kouga…cursing, crowing insults and shouting as he dodged the woman, Kagura's, razor sharp blasts. Suddenly, a stray current of the wind sorceress' power accidentally raged in her direction, and Rin squealed in surprise, leaning low over the saddle to avoid the impact. When the heat and glare faded, she popped back upright with a shaky gasp, patting her chest, legs and shoulders, quite surprised to find herself still in one piece. Ummm, maybe she should be a bit more careful, she scolded within her own mind. She'd HAVE to be a bit more careful if she ever hoped to find her master in this awful place! But before she could continue her search for Sesshoumaru-sama, however, her gaze fell upon a new scene, and a sharp gasp of recognition escaped from her throat…

There, on the blackened ground, lay Kohaku. His body was broken and bruised, and his sister, Sango, was crouched at his side. The taijiya was openly weeping, straining and struggling to drag the boy towards another crumpled form…the crumpled and far-too-still form of the monk, Miroku. But it seemed Kohaku was too heavy for the woman to bear alone, and blood was dripping steadily from a wound in his back, forming a crimson trail on the rocky ground…

They were all terribly hurt, beset on every side by hordes of enraged youkai. And the fire-cat, the neko-youkai that usually accompanied them was no where to be seen. There would be no escape for them, not unless…

Rin did not hesitate. With quick jab from her heels, she circled Aun back around. They glided low over the trio, strong blasts of blue flame bursting forth from the dragon's throats whenever other demons pressed too close.

She was so, so much nearer to them now, close enough, in fact, to recognize the sudden line of tension in the priest's stance. Dimly, Rin realized her slight mistake: Miroku was stumbling to his feet, preparing to defend his companions. Pure instinct was pushing him into action, driving him to attack in response to the vague, shadowy threat that currently loomed above him. In all the confusion and smoky haze, he had obviously mistaken her pitiful rescue attempt for a fresh demon assault, and quickly slipped the loop of black beads free from his palm…

Rin only had time to spit out one quick curse at her own stupidity, before the air about her erupted in a savage maelstrom. She found herself fighting madly, using every ounce of strength she possessed, just to keep her seat in the saddle. "Nooooo!" she cried out, praying she would be heard above the loud roar of the wind tunnel. "It's me, Rin…it's us! Please…I've come to help you!"

Miroku's violet eyes widened in surprise upon hearing that meek plea and he squinted up at her in confusion. The smoke and the haze had cleared a bit, and he must have recognized her frightened face for he looped the bright length of beads back across his right hand as swiftly as he'd removed them. The sudden storm was gone in that very same instant. The priest promptly collapsed again, whether from exhaustion, or sheer relief, Rin could not tell.

Aun touched down with a defiant roar, rearing and stomping…clearly, he was not quite as forgiving about the monk's actions as his mistress appeared to be.

"Kohaku!" Rin shouted anxiously. In a practiced motion she slid her leg over the cantle and leapt down from the saddle, sprinting the instant her feet touched the ground. She raced to the young man's side. Clasping his arm tightly, she braced his left side, easing the brunt of his weight from his sister. "Please, Sango-sama," she murmured softly, catching the older woman's glance. "Let me help!"

The taijiya's strength gave out at that very moment, and unbalanced and overburdened, they all collapsed to the ground. "You…Rin-chan? S-Sesshoumaru? Where?" Sango queried brokenly, one hand now clamped against a ragged tear lacing across her sculpted bicep, the other hand grasping at the bright tethers of her unusual weapon. The demon huntress took in a deep, lingering breath, clearly fighting to organize her words and thoughts. "What are you doing here, Rin-chan? Have you seen ANY of my friends?"

Rin's shoulders slumped. "Only from way up high…but, oh, Kohaku? How? How did this happen?" Tentatively, she pressed at the wound in Kohaku's back, trying to staunch the flow of blood.

"Naraku…t-that bastard," Sango shuddered, unable to hide the venom in her tone or the fury in her eyes. "He simply called away the shard that has been keeping my brother alive and under his control…gods, I don't understand, why would he take it back now?"

Rin found she was unable to keep the distaste and revulsion out of her own tone a she quietly whispered the answer. "Because the ookami is here as well. I saw him. You must flee…I think Naraku has something terrible planned."

Sango's eyes darkened in rage, and for a moment she looked just as mindless and cold as her younger brother did when his soul was lost and fully possessed. "Unbelievable," she muttered, as Rin rose to help her guide the injured Kohaku the remainder of the distance to the monk. "So, Naraku has nearly all the remaining Shikon no Kakera within his grasp right now? Is this how it ends?" A single tear glistened from her dirt streaked cheek until she swiped it away roughly with a leather clad knuckle. "Defeat I can handle now…I can fight Naraku another day. But I will not lose either one of these men to him! Come on then, we have to get these two out of here."

Rin nodded her agreement.

But Kohaku suddenly groaned aloud, and attempted to win free from their hold, startling them both. "Aneue…just put me down," came his tired, muffled protest. "Please hurry, please run…just go…"

"Be quiet, little brother. Be quiet and save some of your strength," Sango interrupted, fondly smoothing the young man's hair back from his forehead with a bruised hand. When Kohaku settled under her touch, she released the boy, trusting him to Rin's care as she knelt to examine her other companion. "Miroku, daijoubu?" she asked, fingers probing at a deep gash on his temple. "Can you stand?" The taijiya waited anxiously for an affirmative nod and a slow, sleepy smile from the monk before returning to her brother. "You're going to be fine, Kohaku. I'll take care of you," she promised feverishly. "I've waited so long…you'll come back to the village with us…there's someone I want you to meet there. I have a daughter now, did you know? She'll be three this autumn. I named her Kaisei…after mother…do you remember our mother now?" She stared pleadingly down into her brother's eyes and held his hand in a fierce grip.

Kohaku's eyes were glazed with pain and regret. "Yes, Sango…I can finally remember our mother, how skilled a slayer she was and…and how kind. But in remembering that, I can…I can also remember father now, too…I remember how he died…how I killed him," he answered bitterly, turning his face into the dirt. "I've done…so much…just leave me here."

"Shhh, keep listening to me," Sango continued, ignoring the boy's defeated words. "Houshi-sama…Miroku…he's my husband now, did you know that? Think about it…if none of this had happened, perhaps I never would have found him! And look, Kohaku, look who else is here! Don't you see this girl? Don't you remember her?"

"Rin-chan?" Kohaku gasped, lifting himself onto his elbows to stare up at her face in wonder.

Rin offered the wounded boy a shy, encouraging smile and squeezed his trembling hand tightly within her own.

Miroku was suddenly on his feet, his hands scrabbling in his robes to draw out a crisp stack of ofuda. "Come on!" he shouted, effectively ending the bittersweet reunion. "We cannot linger here…something's coming. I sense a great concentration of jyaki. Sango, get going! Whatever this is, I'm sure I can hold it off for awhile…"

Rin stared at the monk in disbelief, hardly recognizing his resigned tone. She gasped, only now noticing how out of focus his gaze was. He was not breathing, he WAS panting, and, if possible, his skin seemed even paler than Sesshoumaru-sama's. His dark hair was plastered to his forehead and a line of red venom was steadily extending up his arm. No doubt about it, the monk had been poisoned by Naraku's Saimyoshou. Rin whirled around, finding the ground was littered with the cracked and broken corpses of the deadly insects. Obviously, she realized, the taijiya had tried to hold the creatures off her husband…but…but there had been too many.

Sango growled and gripped Miroku tightly by the collar of his robe. "No! No! I won't lose you!" she challenged. "Sukebe! You filthy pervert! Just as I won't have you sneaking off with those damn village girls, or running away to drink in road-houses, I won't let you die on me either!"

Despite the dire situation, Miroku let out a warm chuckle and pressed his fingers to Sango's lips to silence her. "So be it," he murmured, his free hand wandering around to plant firmly on the un-suspecting taijiya's tempting backside. Surprisingly, the woman only burrowed closer to his chest and did not react, apparently content to let that hand remain there.

At that very moment, Rin's mind was made up.

"Stop!" she yelled, waving her arms. Her cheeks immediately flared to an interesting shade of pink at speaking at such an un-characteristically high volume of voice. Everyone's eyes fell upon her in surprise, increasing her embarrassment ten-fold. Rin tried to remain composed under their sharp stares. "Aun, come here," she ordered. "Take these people…take them wherever they need to go."

The dragon let out a disbelieving snort at her command. His twin heads drooped, muzzles practically scraping the ground. He whined in protest, before slowly shuffling over to her side. Rin scowled up at the youkai, snapping her fingers and clucking her tongue to get him to move a bit more quickly.

Sango let go of her husband and turned to back the girl, laying a callused hand on her shoulder. "But…but what about you?" the taijiya asked.

Rin's eyes shimmered with emotion as she began her soft reply. "Your husband, your brother, your little daughter, if you leave NOW, my way, you get to keep them all. Sango-sama, YOU have what you came for…" She trailed off slowly, gesturing back at Kohaku and Miroku, before continuing. "But I came to be with my master. I need to find him. There's something VERY wrong here."

Rin lowered her eyes nervously and waited for their response. She couldn't remember a time when she spoken so many words at once, or had her opinion counted while debating a course of action. Really, she couldn't decide if it was sickening or exhilarating.

"Have you lost your mind, girl? Look at all the demons!" Miroku exclaimed. Now it was his turn to wave his hands wildly in the air, an action which set the rings of his staff jangling loudly.

"No, it's alright," Rin answered proudly. "My master, Sesshoumaru-sama, is here…somewhere. I'll find him. He'll keep me safe." She flashed an easy, trusting smile, believing her own statement to the very depths of her heart and soul.

But Sango seemed less than convinced and eyed her critically. "Ahhh, Rin-chan, does your master even know you're here?"

Rin blanched at the demon slayer's shrewd observation. But, luckily, she recovered quickly. "Of course," she snapped, the lie sitting so heavy and thick on her tongue. "Of course, HE knows everything! HE knows exactly where I am!"

Sango nodded, seeming somewhat satisfied. She quickly marched to a felled oni and yanked a spear from its gut. "Here," she whispered urgently, pressing the weapon into Rin's hands. "Do you know how to use this?"

Rin eyes widened with unexpected glee and she let out a light giggle. "Ummm…I try to stick the pointy end into any demon that gets too close to me?" Her laughter proved infectious and it appeared Sango couldn't help the wry grin that spread across her own face in response to the girl's awful joke.

The taijiya's smile grew even wider as she leapt onto Aun's broad back extending a hand to help her brother and husband up behind her. The dragon hissed at their weight, sidling from side to side in a half-hearted attempt unseat to them. But Sango wasn't daunted in the least and merely took the reins in a firm hand, offering the youkai quick pat to reassure him about his unfamiliar cargo. With one last laugh, she shouted a quick farewell down to Rin. "Stick the pointy end into…ha, that was a good one! Just when I was beginning to wonder how someone so sweet could possibly have grown up with Sesshoumaru, you hit me with his sarcasm," she quipped. "Very, very nice!"

Rin blushed, finding any observation that linked her mannerisms to those of her great master to be the highest form of compliment ever. She suddenly found herself filled with all manner of illogical, maidenly thoughts, and wondered briefly if Sesshoumaru-sama HIMSELF ever noticed how hard she tried to imitate him. Rin wondered if he ever noticed the great pains she undertook each and everyday. She wondered if he ever recognized how desperately she fought to behave only in the ways that seemed to please him most…hoping to see if she could win one of his rare smiles, hoping to see if she could coax him to speak to her, hoping to see if she could make his amber eyes meet with her own. Her out of place musings were quickly ended by a fierce bout of rumbling from Aun.

It appeared that donating the dragon's strength and service was much easier in verbal agreement than in actuality. At first, Aun obstinately refused to leave her. He spun wildly, trying to throw his new riders. Then, when the swift circles failed to remove them from his back, he promptly began to buck. But even weary and injured, Kohaku, Sango and Miroku were all experienced riders, wise to such tricks, and proved far too difficult to dislodge. As a last resort, the dragon whipped one head around, his needle-teeth snapping and planting...none-too-gently...in the houshi's long robes. "Fuck," the priest gasped, treating them all to an astonishing display of rather unholy vocabulary.

Rin shook her head at Aun's antics and stepped forward to slap the stubborn creature on the flank, finally succeeding in driving him into the air. He gave two last mournful rumbles. "Get them out of here!" she called after him, casting the proud beast an adoring grin. "If you're so worried, Ahhh, Unnnn, go quickly and hurry back for ME!"

Rin's smile faded as she watched the retreating group disappear over the horizon. She readjusted her clumsy hold on the foreign weapon in her hands, then turned and raced into the battle.

She was REALLY in trouble now, she mused. Until Aun returned, the only way for her to get out of here safely was to find Sesshoumaru-sama…

At that very moment, a lumbering demon charged out of the mist to meet her, the rusty edge of his dull halberd streaking right towards her face. Rin froze, and despite her glib words to Sango, was now completely unsure of what she should do. Luckily, the demon confronting her had not anticipated meeting so tiny, or so motionless, of an adversary. His halberd cut past her head, whistling through the air several inches above the long ponytail that secured her wavy bangs…

Pointy end! Pointy end! Pointy end goes into any demon that comes to close! Rin's mind squeaked and she suddenly remembered what needed to be done. She closed her hazel eyes and lurched into motion, shoving the spear forward with a defiant cry. Much to her surprise the weapon struck into something…something…squishy. She cracked an eyelid, and her face twisted in disgust at that sight that awaited her.

Her spear…it was sticking straight out of the oni's right eye. The demon wailed and stumbled about in shock, tripping and falling heavily to the ground, his own clumsy flailing driving the weapon into his rather primitive brain. He twitched a few times, kicking out with powerful and disgustingly hairy legs, and then lay still.

**Dead.**

"Ewww," Rin whispered, wrinkling her nose at the black blood and pulp dripping from the demon's skull. That thing…she had killed it. She had brought that monster down all by herself! And without any screams for help, without any hysterics, without needing a rescue! Surprisingly, at that moment, she felt weak rather than powerful and empowered. It was like someone had pulled out all of her muscles and replaced them with overcooked noodles. Her emotions were surging wildly and she quickly struggled to make sense of them all. Is this what her master felt when he fought? Is this what he craved…this sudden fear that gave away to primal exhilaration and horror?

For herself, she wasn't sure if she really liked the feeling.

She was still too shocked, too numb, to be really proud of her own accomplishment, and so she just stared down at the dead youkai, shuffling her bare feet in the dust.

She didn't get to remain that way for long.

There was a sudden explosion to her left, an explosion so powerful that it rocked the very ground. Rin shielded her eyes against the flare of light that followed the noise, squinting into the sky to identity whatever or whoever had caused the blast. There, high above her, six spinning crescent blades cut through the air; slicing along with the wind currents. The girl knew them at once. No doubt in her mind…that was…that was Kagura's power. There was a second explosion, and then the crash of an impact, the sick thud of a body slamming into rock. That noise was quickly followed by another sound, a whirring sound, like a mighty cyclone. Rin cocked her head, falling back in instinctive fear as she suddenly heard a deep laugh: loud, gravelly and wild. She gasped, her memories bringing forth images of the creature responsible for that distinctively arrogant laugh…

The wolf. The wolf was fighting the wind witch, he was pursing her, hunting her down. The pair was now headed her way, coming closer and closer with each second that passed. Rin shook all over, a cold sheen of sweat drenching her brow.

**Wolves.** A wolf was coming. It didn't matter that it wasn't after her. She couldn't stay here anymore.

Without wasting another moment, she set herself to the difficult…and disgusting…task of retrieving her spear, now crushed under the demon's considerable bulk. Surprisingly, the spear was much easier to reclaim than she thought it would be. As it slid free of the demon's eye socket, Rin groaned, instantly noticing the reason for the ease in which it came loose.

The weapon was broken in half.

Rin cursed her luck, letting the end of the spear dangle loosely from her fingers. But she knew she had to run…NOW…if she wished to avoid Kouga and Kagura. She turned and fled, leaping behind a boulder just as they crashed past her, Kouga roaring with laughter, and Kagura clutching at her bloody, empty chest and screaming fierce, highly unladylike epitaphs back at him. Rin breathed a sigh of relief as they sped onward without noticing her. She was just beginning to ponder her next course of action, when something bumped into her.

Rin stumbled, more annoyed than frightened now, her hands slapping at the sudden pain in her thigh. She brought her fingers up to sweep her bangs from her eyes, wondering what had brushed against her leg. She let out a low cry, as her hands came away slick with blood. And even in the dark light she could she the blood was red. It was human blood, her own blood.

There was a quick mocking laugh and Rin whirled around to find a particularly ugly little youkai leering at her. It had a long snake-like body, a round, bony jaw brimming with sharp rows of scissor teeth, and, most repulsive of all, a keen and far too human shaped pair of eyes. Most of the face seemed sickeningly human, in fact…all and all it was like someone had taken a VERY, VERY ugly old man's face and smashed onto an fat, slimy eel's body. Before she could spit out a word, it had launched itself back into the air, streaking towards her, whip tail snapping. This time Rin didn't close her eyes. Though she was small and not very strong, her aim had always been true. The broken spear tore through the demon's green skin, piercing the place where the human like neck met the ribbon-like body. The wound wasn't lethal, but…for the moment…it had pinned the beast to the ground. The demon fought against the spear's hold, railing up at her, spitting and foaming and cursing in a high-pitched, ear-splitting whine.

As Rin lay back to gather her wits, she quickly examined the ragged wound on her thigh, and knew couldn't let the creature live. It was in a mad fury and it had already bitten her once. It had gotten a taste of her blood and knew her scent, and if it got loose it would hunt her down and kill her. She shifted along the ground, her lashes lowered but her eyes unwavering and never leaving the youkai's hideous face. Her shaky fingers settled about a smooth stone and she gripped it tightly to her chest. Slowly, she rose and advanced upon the trapped youkai, feeling more than a little sick to her stomach.

She gritted her teeth, raised her fist, and struck --- all the while pretending she was merely helping Jaken dispatch some fat trout they had just wrestled onto a riverbank.

When it was done she scrambled up a sharp outcropping of gravel, not only seeking cover but a higher vantage point from which to locate Sesshoumaru-sama. Her thigh was throbbing, she could feel her blood rushing through her veins with every beat of her heart. She wasn't bleeding anymore, but that damn pulsing feeling was so distracting. She decided she should probably not to use her leg so much, so she dropped to her belly to crawl up the rocks. Up ahead she could make out a faint pink light, rippling like the reflection of water and arcing along the confines of a narrow gulch. She reached the crest of the outcropping and gazed down, her breath dying in her throat at what she found there.

There, right below her, her beautiful master was standing so proudly, challenging the oddest pair of allies she had ever seen…that…that man…Naraku…and the solemn miko…Kikyou…

And…just as she would have expected, Toukijin had already been drawn…

* * *

Rin came back to the present, slapping her hands down over the water's surface, shattering her sad reflection. She simply didn't want to remember the rest.

The girl cast a quick glance up at the sky, noting that the moon was very high now. _This was it._ She could no longer delay the coming confrontation.

Gathering up her clothing and her courage, she began the slow march back to the clearing. She knew without a doubt where her master's ire lay. She was not irretrievably stupid…no matter how much Jaken liked to imply it. SHE had disgraced her master, her unsought and unwanted interference in his battle with another 'mere' hanyou angering him beyond reason.

Rin suddenly thought of all the times in her life when she had witnessed the taiyoukai's cold, terrifying gaze as it fell upon some hapless enemy. Last night, that same black expression had rested squarely on her. It was almost as if Sesshoumaru was willing her to disappear under his glare, much as any foe would dissolve twisting and screaming under his Dokkasou.

As Rin continued her slow march, her thoughts returned to Kagome, and she felt an inexplicable stab of jealousy. The priestess may have not known in which direction her hanyou's heart lay for many years, but, at one time or another she had to have known that she had at least touched SOME small part of it.

And, over the years, Kagome had been given the chance to prove her value on her own…she had become a strong miko in possession of formidable powers. She could be depended upon in a fight, and her ability to sense Shikon no Kakera had given Inuyasha an edge for what seemed like ages now…

"But what good have I been to Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin mused aloud.

The girl frowned. As she had grown, and Naraku had used her increasingly as a pawn to draw her master into combat, she, like Kagome, had been forced to pick up basic skills to defend herself for the times she was left on her own. Years of roaming the woods in Sesshoumaru's wake had taught her how to be silent and stealthy over every terrain imaginable. She had even, on occasion, successfully snuck up on him. _Well_, she corrected, she had only snuck up on him twice! The young woman's eyes automatically glowed with pride as she remembered one of the few times he had actually praised her for silent feet and her prowess…

_Gods_, she had spent the past eight years trying to find ways to please him, trying to find some way to serve with some tangible use…

Now, the one time she thought she had done something that truly mattered it seemed she had only broken whatever strange bond had caused him to allow her to remain by his side in the first place.

Rin was more frightened now than she had been when she was alone, faced with the chance of her own possible death, unarmed and exposed on the battlefield the night before.

After all, she owed her lord everything…her entire existence was borrowed time he had granted her on a mere whim!

Rin reached the camp, skirting along the fringe of the clearing, dreading the moment when she would step into the open. She could see Aun moving through the trees ahead, circling the same patch of dry grass he had been foraging through when she had left hours earlier. _Oh no!_ she thought, suddenly remembering about the dragon's saddle. She had not removed it before she fell into her exhausted sleep, nor had she tended to the beast earlier that evening. Doubtlessly, he would have sores from the stiff leather rubbing against his scaly hide. Silently, she cursed herself for her selfishness and hobbled up the slope, quick as her injured leg would allow…

Upon entering the small clearing, Rin realized that the harness and trappings were gone.

She sighed in relief and then shook her head at her own stupidity. Of course Sesshoumaru-sama would have seen to the creature on his own! Aun was a valuable asset, a loyal and fierce defender. More than a simple means of transportation, the two-headed youkai was an integral part of her master's arsenal. He called upon the dragon to serve in times of battle with as little thought as he would give to drawing Toukijin! she mused. Sesshoumaru-sama simply could not afford for the beast to be lame.

Both of Aun's heads rose in unison as he scented her, two welcoming rumbles (with just the slightest difference in pitch to set them apart), issuing from his throats. Moving to greet him and stroking each offered muzzle in turn, Rin released the creature's tether and sent him off to graze with a sweet smile and a small swat on the cool skin of his flank. Aun tossed his mane, and gave a twisting coltish buck, before taking to the air in search of a greener field.

After Aun's spirited departure, further investigation of the clearing revealed that her lord had taken his brooding elsewhere. Jaken was finally awake, scowling as he sat before a small fire, making no move to acknowledge her presence. "Jaken-sama, I've…w-where is…" she began lamely. Rin's first thoughts were to inquire about her master, but then she thought better upon it, seeing the dejected look on the toad youkai's face. He responded to her un-asked question with a self-important sneer.

"Hmmpph! This Jaken did not presume to think he could ask the lord of his intentions…furthermore…"

Rin cut him off before he could continue, letting out an exasperated sigh as she collapsed beside him, warming her chilled hands over the tiny flames. "Ahhh, Master Jaken! So Sesshoumaru-sama was gone before you awoke?" she asked in a teasing tone. Despite her growing anxiety, a sarcastic grin lighted briefly upon her face and her eyebrows arched in amusement. Years of having this short-tempered little demon serve alternately as both a surrogate parent and squabbling rival for Sesshoumarus attention had taught her only too well how to play these games. These days, she could see right through every one of his pretentious little speeches.

Jaken threw her a mock-threatening glare, opened his mouth to deliver some scathing retort, and then snapped it back shut again with a pout. His complete exhaustion and his grudging concern for this young human woman…this young human woman who had been forced to become a regular fixture in his life…had won out. They sat together in silence for many hours, watching as the fire faded into glowing embers. Jaken fidgeted annoyingly, his mind obviously wracked with the same concerns as Rin…_after all, perhaps Sesshoumaru-sama would fail to return for him as well!_

After a time, Rin could stand it no longer and, with a resigned sigh, moved in search of a quieter place to rest. True, the fire's heat had provided much welcome comfort, and the hypnotic, slow dance of the flames had distracted her from her own nervousness, but she needed to move before she snapped. Jaken's twitching and grumbling was driving her mad! And getting angry and losing her temper with the toad was something she could not afford now…

Especially since he seemed to be the **ONLY** creature willing to talk to her at the moment.

Silently, Rin rose from the warm circle of the fire's edge. She made her way to the edge of the open field and spread out into the cool grass, lying on her back to take in the stars. Perhaps, she thought sleepily, perhaps wherever he had wandered off to, Sesshoumaru-sama was still gazing at them too.


	4. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3: Wakare**

**

* * *

**

Rin was awoken for the second time that evening when an ominous shadow crossed over her form. Staring up at the source, she was surprised to find Sesshoumaru-sama looming over her. He glowered down upon her, as if she were some kind of vile parasite, his eyes filled with icy malice. He had never seemed more otherworldly and detached than at that very moment. In fact, he appeared more feral now than upon the day she had first inadvertently stumbled across him in the forest…

She took a deep breath to calm herself.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, Rin can explain. Rin didn't mean…" she began sweetly, reverting to the submissive speech pattern of her childhood in attempt to pacify him.

She was abruptly interrupted by a rumbling growl, and found herself seized fast in her master's rough grip before her mind even had time to register his movement. He dragged her up against the length of his unyielding body, and she cried out in pain as her already bruised form collided with the cold, broken armor on his shoulder.

"You actually seek to patronize this Sesshoumaru! So, it is true then! You really believe you **HAVE** 'tamed' me?" he murmured incredulously.

"Master?" she moaned in confusion, writhing in an attempt to ease the needle-sharp points of his claws from her skin. "Gomen nasai! I don't understand..."

"**Why did you interfere!**" he shouted, silencing her soft query. Rin blanched, he so rarely made any exclamation with emotion...now his voice was raw with it.

Despite her apprehension, her fingers instinctively reached to touch his arm in a soothing gesture meant to placate and calm him. "Please, my lord..."

"**NO**!" Sesshoumaru barked out, batting her small, cool hands away. His razor-edge talons bit further into her shoulders and he shook her with such ferocity that Rin feared her neck would break.

"Ningen!" he raged, spitting out the word as if it were poison. "Do you think I am as weak and feeble as that damn hanyou? Do you think I require anything from you or your filthy, piteous race!" The taiyoukai 's deep voice lowered to a dangerous whisper. "Little girl, do you even **KNOW** what I am?"

He flung her away, and through the haze of spinning stars that swam amidst her vision, she realized suddenly that his eyes were no longer the color of gold, but a lurid crimson, richer than blood.

Rin's breath, which had until now been coming out in irregular little gasps, seemed to stop altogether as her eyes tracked his entire transformation, rising skyward to look upon his full, towering height. She had known of this power all along. Jaken's incessant pride in his master had caused him to repeat countless gory tales of Sesshoumaru's violent exploits while in his 'true' form...

But, until now, she had never witnessed the metamorphosis for herself.

Her idealized notions about what this change would be like vanished in the face of the menacing beast looming before her. Acid dripped from its maw to sizzle in the grass, and its eyes rolled in animalistic fury. It was snarling, hackles raised, ears pinned flat...

Without warning, the massive paws suddenly snapped forward to brace twenty feet on either side of her, effectively cutting off any escape route. Crouching as if ready to spring, the great demon merely lowered its head and bayed wildly. Its jaws snapped mere inches from her face, revealing fangs that were very nearly twice her size...

Rin tumbled backward blindly, both from the force of the hot breath rushing past her and the sheer volume of that great bark. Her mind was so numb that she didn't even raise her arm to break her fall. The jarring collision with the ground was followed by a second, unexpected impact to her chest...an impact that completely knocked all breath from her lungs.

Sesshoumaru had smoothly reverted back to his beautiful, customary state, and was pinning her roughly to the ground, grinding her into the dirt as if trying to let the very earth swallow her up. His flawless face was no less enraged then it had been while twisted into that horrible canine form, and his sharp fangs were still bared at her throat. Held immobile beneath his heavy weight, her hands trapped at her sides, Rin could do nothing but turn her face to avoid his murderous gaze.

As the girl lay whimpering beneath him, her body wracked with deep tremors, something in the back of Sesshoumaru's mind began to protest against this brutality. Even though the scent of fear hung heavily in the air, calling to his predatory instincts, something else... **_something stronger_**...made him want to reach out and offer comfort, to ask her for forgiveness...

**WHY!**

With a snarl, he quickly pushed those thoughts aside as further evidence as to how greatly she had weakened him. It suddenly struck him that though he had seen her afraid from time to time over the years, HE had never actually been the cause...

Her eyes always shone with trust, warmth, and a near sycophantic devotion when they fell upon him.

_Little bitch_, his mind roared. _**She SHOULD cringe!**_

Certainly, he had indulged her too much. _Did she truly believe she was above her lowly station simply because he tolerated her miserable presence?_

Sesshoumaru felt defeated...even more so, in fact, than when facing Naraku. With her face turned into the dust and her eyes squeezed shut as if to seal out the truth, Rin was daring to deny him the chance to savor her terror. She was cheating him, robbing him of the opportunity to witness her final acceptance of the truth...

_**That she was nothing to him.**_

Rin cried out in pain as his hand tangled in her hair, forcing her head back. "Look at **ME**! Kono ore wo miro!" he cried out in a hoarse voice that he himself did not recognize. "Open your eyes, girl!"

Rin released a choking sob, years of obeying her lord's commands without question causing her to comply instantly, eyelids fluttering from the sting of the acrid vapor still lingering in the air. Slowly, she turned her head, and beheld the changes etched onto Sesshoumaru's usually stoic and emotionless face.

_**He was a stranger to her. **_

The crimson stripes that angled across his high cheekbones had grown larger, more ragged, and his eyes still blazed scarlet. She watched helplessly as those glowing red pools suddenly narrowed, and slowly he extended a long finger to capture one of the tears clinging to her sooty lashes.

Sesshoumaru stared at his damp fingers, bringing those salty droplets up for closer examination. His tongue flicked out, eager to taste the evidence of Rin's misery.

He found it..._**delicious**_. _And he wanted more._

His lips suddenly twisted into a sardonic smile, and he ran his sharp claws across the smooth column of her exposed throat, watching as her pulse twitched spasmodically. Unable to stop himself, he drew closer, and felt Rin automatically stiffen in response.

"Human," he hissed, hot breath tickling her neck with each spoken word. "Did you think you meant something to me? Did you think I needed you?"

Sesshoumaru's fist twisted, winding deeper into her hair. The pain of his actions dragged another involuntary gasp from the shaking girl and forced a few more of those luscious tears to leak from the corners of her eyes. "You were merely a test," he breathed. "A test to prove Tenseiga's power. You remained in my presence simply because killing so pathetic a creature was totally beneath my time and dignity."

Upon hearing that damning declaration, Rin's whole body became wracked with choking sobs, his words seeming to have a more profound and damaging effect on her psyche then the current threat of physical violence.

Perfect, Sesshoumaru mused, gazing down at her ashen face. _After all, wasn't the ability to cause her grief so effortlessly proof that he was not bound to her? _He tried to press on, but found himself unable to contrive any other cruel words. He frowned. His throat was suddenly too tight and something was stinging at the corner of his eyes. _Strange_, he thought. His own poison had never affected him before..._why did his eyes burn so?_

Rin's cries and gasps for air brought his attention back to her slender throat, where her blood rushed in waves beneath the thin skin, crashing along with every beat of her pounding heart. He had never held her this close before, and found himself staring at her dark scars with a kind of fascination. His youkai blood insured he would never bare such markings. Even the deep gaping wound that Naraku had inflicted to his chest only yesterday was already nearly healed...

But Rin's flesh was marred, still damaged after all these years. It was yet another tell-tale sign of human frailty. That, coupled with her sentimental human emotions that over-shadowed all common sense and reason, causing her to blind herself to that fact that he was so similar to the beasts that inflicted those wounds so long ago.

Sesshoumaru smiled at that sudden inspiration. He had already tasted her tears and found them good, but there was so, so much more to savor here. _How much more enjoyable could this be if he pressed on?  
_Deliberately, as if to remind her of her tortured past and the agony of her own death, he slowly drew one elongated fang across her collarbone. Rin's eyes glazed over and she shrieked, lost in a memory perhaps, as she beat a small fist against his chest. She broke from his grasp, rising to tear at his face with those ridiculous things humans had in place of claws. She had never raised her voice, struck him, or resisted him in any way before, and he watched with impassive disinterest as she continued to lash out at him as savagely as her fragile form would allow. The tears and dust had formed grimy tracks on her lovely cheeks, and her eyes narrowed in pain...

A pain, he suddenly realized, that was echoing in his own eyes. _**This wasn't delicious, this wasn't enjoyable...this was sickening!**_ Groaning, he nuzzled his face in the crook of her neck to hide his confusion.

_**Why!**_

_**Why did she make him feel this humiliation and doubt?**_

The fine, silky strands of her long hair teased against his parted lips and every breath he took in flooded him with more of her scent. _Flower fields, and tall grass, and nights under the stars, and storm showers, and mountain streams, and his own demand...and Inuyasha._

_**Inuyasha!**_

The taiyoukai's brow creased in confusion and he inhaled again. _Yes, Inuyasha_. The trace was amazingly faint, but it proved the hanyou was still alive. _And very close._ Somewhere, somehow, the girl had briefly crossed over his path again within the past few hours.

After last night's rescue the half-breed was truly in his debt, and Sesshoumaru had suddenly found the most befitting way to settle all claims of obligation. A way to put an end to whatever strange emotion was currently clamoring inside him...

"**Get up!**" he growled, pulling Rin to her unsteady feet before she had a chance to comply on her own. He rather doubted she could follow his command anyway; her eyes were dumb, dazed and unfocused, and her every limb trembled.

Not wishing to waste any more time, Sesshoumaru gathered the shaking, exhausted girl tightly in his arms, and glided into the dense forest on a cloud of youki.

* * *

Inuyasha scowled. His plans to spend the day curled up with Kagome had been rudely interrupted by Shippou's sudden arrival. Not that he wasn't relieved to know that the obnoxious young fox was alright, but he could have used a few more tender hours alone at the riverbank with the woman he had come to love. After all, there were plenty of years of pent up frustration to make up for.

As if reading the wicked direction of his thoughts, Kagome laid her head on his shoulder and murmured one word softly into his ear before giving it a gentle tweak.

_Tonight_, she whispered seductively.

He grinned.

_Damn_, waiting WAS probably for the best really...he still had yet to learn the fate of Miroku and Sango. If the couple was alright, they doubtlessly would have headed back to the village immediately. Though Kaede was a powerful and skilled priestess, he knew Sango could not bear to leave her child in anyone's care for too long...no matter how capable they demonstrated themselves to be.

Inuyasha sat back on his haunches, remembering his initial concern at Sango's pregnancy and the delay it caused in the hunt for Shikon no Kakera. But he could never resent the couple's reasoning and had understood their desire to start their family. After all, as the fight with Naraku continued to drag on, the Kazaana had begun expand, steadily creeping up Miroku's wrist.

And their child, Kaisei, was adorable too, he admitted as the toddler's chubby little face flashing through his mind. He stole a quick glance at Kagome and tried to imagine what their children would be like. At those thoughts a strange feeling of contentedness spread through him, stilling his breath and spreading a sleepy kind of languor through his every limb. Suddenly, he also found himself imagining how much he would enjoy making those children with her..._**again and again and again and again**_. _**And then some more. Definitely something to look forward to.**_

Seeming to sense his intense gaze, Kagome suddenly looked up from the fire, her cheeks tinged with a soft dusting of pink...

A sudden shift in the wind caused the half-demon to leap to his feet. He was quickly followed by the kitsune. In that instant, they both knew something was wrong. Something was coming: _something formidable, dark and commanding. Something cold, bitter and angry_. Inuyasha recognized it at once.

_**Sesshoumaru.**_

He barely had time to knock the confused Kagome to the ground behind him before the tree-line splintered open in a blast of power.

When the smoke and raining pine needles cleared, Sesshoumaru drifted forward, bracing the limp form of Rin in his arms.

"Hello, otouto," he began in a light, condescending tone, bristling down at the hanyou and the miko that was rising defiantly behind him.

The scent of recent mating hung all around the woman, and Sesshoumaru scowled in revulsion..._a demon and a human._ _**Disgusting.**_ All the more reason to proceed with his decision regarding Rin's fate.

With a sneer, he threw the trembling Rin unceremoniously to the forest floor. Kagome gasped in shock and rushed forward to cradle the girl close, drawing a noise of reprimand from Inuyasha as he was forced to race forward belatedly to shield the pair.

"Temee..." the hanyou began, locking angry eyes with his brother.

"What!" Sesshoumaru queried sarcastically. "No gratitude to your aniki for saving your worthless hide last night? Ohh, you wound me deeply, Inuyasha."

"Keh, I'm sure," Inuyasha snorted. "Now...what the fuck do you want?"

"Inuyasha, I realize your powers of retention have their limits. But if you try...perhaps this once...to use that feeble, undoubtably tiny brain lodged beneath those unsightly things you call ears...you will remember you now owe me a great debt. One I have simply come to collect."

Startled and confused, Inuyasha looked back and forth from the whimpering girl in Kagome's arms to his brother, still not exactly sure of what was happening...

"Debt? What the hell!" he cried, raising the Tetsusaiga higher. "You're not still whining about **MY** damn sword! Grow up!"

"Innnu...**_yasha_**!" Sesshoumaru exploded, his patience ending, his nerves screaming, and his demon instincts still clamoring for..._something, anything that would make him feel normal once again!_ "Damare!" Gods, his half-brother was so exhausting and dense. "I am not interested in the Tetsusaiga, but..._**THAT!**_" he clarified, flourishing a pale hand over Rin in a dismissive wave. "**YOU **will take this creature. You appear to have a certain...**_fondness_**...for them." He wrinkled his nose and smirked rather offensively at Kagome. The gesture was offered mostly just to see Inuyasha blush which, of course, the he promptly DID...and then some, actually fuming to bright scarlet with rage. Feeling only mildly better, Sesshoumaru turned to leave.

"Bastard!" Inuyasha gritted at the taiyoukai's retreating back. "What the hell is going on? Where do you think..." He was interrupted by a high, piercing shout from behind him.

"Iyada - **NO**!' Rin screamed, snapping out of her stupor, and fighting her way from Kagome's grasp. "Don't leave me, Sesshoumaru-sama! Onegai?"

Sesshoumaru paused at the mournful plea; he had never heard Rin's voice so raw and needy. That strange, unidentifiable pain was rising in his chest again. He knew he had to escape before any trace of it became manifest on his face.

"Farewell, Rin," he answered slowly. The strange breeze that always accompanied the rise of his power began to build, lifting him into the air. His long hair shifted in the wind, his youki pulling him steadily away. Though he refused to turn around, the taiyoukai allowed himself one last surreptitious glance at the girl, stealing a peek over his shoulder before rapidly fading back into the forest.

"What the hell!" Inuyasha snapped as his half-brother disappeared into the trees. "Oi! You fucking bastard!" he called out, exchanging a quick glance with the equally baffled Shippou.

"Sesshoumaru...you...y-you get b-back here!" the fox shouted, looking to Inuyasha for some support. The kitsune's chin lifted and he waved a tight fist high in the air at the hanyou's fierce, approving smirk. "Get back here, you evil...e-evil..."

Shippou couldn't really decide just how to end his insult, not accustomed to cursing at anyone save Inuyasha. It didn't really matter anyway, for with a nod, both the he and the hanyou had shot forward in pursuit.

"Inuyasha - matte!" Kagome cried, stumbling a few steps behind them. She had nearly lost the hanyou last night and she wasn't sure her heart could handle watching him head into another bloody confrontation so soon, especially in light of the new level in their relationship. She waited, knowing precisely how important this moment really was, anxiously running her fingers along the prayer beads contained in her pocket. Besides offering her body to the hanyou last night, she had granted him his freedom from the subduing spell. Now it was time to see if her trust would be repaid. "What are you going to do?" she asked quickly, half afraid of the answer.

"What do you think I'm going to do? I'm going after that son of a bitch and dragging him back here!" Despite his raised voice, the tightness around Inuyasha's eyes softened when he turned back to the miko.

"No," came a strange, sad reply, and the hanyou looked down in surprise, having been addressed by Rin for the first time. It appeared that his proposed course of action had quieted the girl's sobs where all of Kagome's gentle crooning and soft words could not.

"Please...just don't," Rin whimpered, her fingers gouging deeply into the damp earth beneath her. "Sesshoumaru-sama...Sesshoumaru-sama never changes his mind."

Inuyasha was baffled...this had to be the **WORST** couple of days he'd experienced in a long, long time. Kikyou's betrayal, Naraku's near victory, the anxiety that came from wondering if all of his companions were safe, Kagome...well, when it came to Kagome, at least ONE event was admittedly wonderful, he corrected. But now this?

He stared down at the girl, examined her carefully, trying to reconcile the memory of that frenetic, chattering little creature whose hands had always been full of bright flowers to this distraught and pale young woman before him now.

_Rin was really quite beautiful,_ the hanyou mused. Obviously, Shippou thought so as well. He couldn't help but notice that the fox was being uncharacteristically quiet, sneaking shy, quick glances in her direction and shifting his paws in the dust uncomfortably.

The girl had presently risen to stare blankly in the direction Sesshoumaru had taken, as Kagome continued to rub small circles on her back. Despite the passage of many years, he realized she was still rather small...in fact, he had never been more aware of just how tiny and vulnerable she was until he had seen his brother holding her close a few moments before. Sesshoumaru absolutely towered over her petite form!

A closer inspection of her sad face revealed wide, timorous eyes and, much like Kagome, a tiny stubborn jaw. Her dark hair flowed down to the small of her back where it fell and curled in unruly, windblown waves that were full of strange auburn highlights from long days spent in the sun. _What had she seen on this day?_ Inuyasha wondered, taking in the scent of her fear and horror. What the hell had happened? He returned to focusing on the girl's eyes. They were widely shaped, exotic eyes that held a strange orange-hazel glow, a glow that was made even more brilliant now with the glistening of falling tears.

**_Why had Sesshoumaru abandoned her?_ _Obviously, his older brother could NOT have been thinking too clearly! Why bring her to HIM of all people!_** the hanyou seethed to himself in his anger, moving to pace back and forth. His own life was far from peaceful, and he was still being ruthlessly hunted and toyed with by Naraku. _Hell_, he didn't even know if he could ensure his own personal safety or protect his 'regular' companions, let alone the unexpected addition of this weeping young woman!

Sesshoumaru's decision, he concluded, had obviously been made in desperation, without much thought. It was completely rash and impulsive...not like the calculating taiyoukai at all. Something was **very, VERY, VERY** wrong

Inuyasha stopped pacing to spare a confused glance at Kagome. She looked back at him helplessly, shrugging her shoulders. But before he could speak to the priestess or question the young girl in her arms, a second resounding crash echoed through the camp...

"Now what?" he growled, claws crackling with youki, ready to take on any anything. He reached to his waist to draw Tetsusaiga again, feeling a hot rush of adrenaline as the blade transformed. He spun to confront this latest intruder, coming face to face with a massive bull with a trio of ridiculous, over-sized blinking eyes. _Wait a second..._

"Easy there, ya mongrel!" called a familiar, scratchy old voice from high atop the beast's back.

"Totosai?"

"Stop waving that thing around! Poor Momo...he's not as young as he used to be, you know!" the ancient demon piped out as leapt to the ground. He offered the bull a fond pat on one fat shoulder before quietly adding, "Hmphh! Me too, for that matter!"

"What do you want, old man!" Inuyasha questioned with a huff, not knowing if he had the energy to deal with this scatter-brained old rascal right now.

Totosai, as usual, simply ignored his question. "Where is she? Where is she?" he asked. He clapped his chapped hands together excitedly as he spied the two young human girls who were staring back at him in wide-eyed surprise. "Ah - here we are!" he exclaimed happily, his gaze focusing exclusively on Rin.

"Machiyagare, jiji!" Inuyasha persisted. "What do want with her!"

Totosai rolled his dark eyes, eyes that were as wide and beady as those of his pet bull's. "Will you quit your shouting, kozo!" he snapped. "I just want to talk to the girl...it's not everyday I get to meet a human who's been resurrected by Tenseiga, you know! Afterall, it's only happened once before..."

_**"Nani?"**_

****

* * *

****

**Kono ore wo miro: "Look at me!"  
Damare: "Silence!"  
Otouto: little brother  
Chichiue: Honored Father  
Aneue: honored older sister  
Matte: wait!  
Machiyagare: insulting form of "wait a minute!"  
Temee: very derogatory form of you  
Iyada: No!  
Onegai: please  
Kozo: derogatory form of a bratty boy**


	5. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4: Shinsei**

**

* * *

**

"Resurrected by Tenseiga?" Inuyasha repeated. "Listen old man, it's been a pretty damn messed-up couple of days, and if you don't start explaining..." The hanyou waved Tetsusaiga threateningly, as Kagome pursed her lips in a silent warning for him to behave.

Totosai's breath rushed past his leathery lips in an unmistakable huff. "Yes, resurrected by Tenseiga...now if you'd excuse me, mongrel, I'd like to talk to the girl!" The old demon brushed past without even sparing a backwards glance, as the hanyou growled at being dismissed so quickly.

"**Oi!** Get back here!" Inuyasha gritted, stomping in the old demon's wake.

Though Kagome was appalled by their behavior, she still chose to ignore the two youkai and their impending fray. Instead, she wrapped an arm around Rin's shoulders to comfort her. "I'd always wondered how you came to travel with Sesshoumaru," she murmured gently. "Ummm...you, _ahhh_, remember Totosai, right? He's a friend... " Kagome paused in her explanation, biting her lip and feeling exceedingly stupid.

_**Rin barely knew her OR Inuyasha! She must be so confused! And, it would be terribly hard to be asked to trust someone, especially someone as bizarre looking as Totosai, by a near stranger**_.

Kagome struggled in vain to think of ways to reassure Rin. "Well, I mean, you know Totosai is the smith that forged Tenseiga and Tetsusaiga, and he..." the miko trailed off, realizing this was most definitely NOT an appropriate time for a drawn-out introduction. It was then that she took in a full appraising look at Rin's injuries. The poor girl looked simply dreadful. There were numerous lacerations on her little hands, and a nasty gash split her temple. A patch of dried blood stained her robes at her thigh, clearly indicating that beneath the fabric there was an oozing cut in desperate need of care. But, by far, the most disturbing wounds the girl carried were the twin bruises formed under the ragged tears in the sleeves of her kimono.

Kagome's eyes narrowed. It seemed **_someone_** had seized the girl roughly, unmindful of his sharp claws.

The miko let out a slow breath, completely aghast. _**Yes, there was no mistaking it**_. She was fully aware of what specific action it took to cause that kind of damage to skin and clothing. After all, she herself had been grabbed by Inuyasha in a similar manner on those occasions when he transformed into a full demon...

"Hey, Hey, **HEY**!" Kagome shouted, clapping her hands for emphasis.

The miko forced her gaze away from Rin and began to scold. "Gentlemen...it's not time for...**THIS**!" She rolled her eyes at the unmistakable scene of Totosai trying to wrench the Tetsusaiga from Inuyasha's hands. "I'm afraid there are a few more important things to worry about right now than your egos!"

Tightening her grip around Rin's shoulders, Kagome ushered the girl away from the now speechless demons. Stopping only to grab a few supplies from her ridiculously beat-up old back-pack, she proceeded to lead the shivering girl down to the privacy of the stream-bed.

Rin offered no resistance, and remained eerily silent as she allowed the older woman to tend to her many wounds. Kagome reached automatically for her first-aid kit, brows lowered in anger.

"Did he do all this to you?" she asked quietly.

"No, just...some." Rin whispered in a flat tone, unconsciously reaching to rub her fingers over the bruises on her biceps. "There was Naraku too, and...Miko-sama, I don't think I want to talk about it now."

Kagome nodded in understanding. **_Naraku, huh?_** she mused. _**So, Rin had been on that hellish battlefield as well.**_ Her natural curiosity ate at her, but she respected the girl's obvious need for silence. "This will sting a bit," the priestess murmured, gingerly dabbing some antiseptic on her forehead and offering a soft smile of sympathy when she flinched.

Rin ignored the persistent sting of the strange medicine, choosing to focus instead on the painful snippets of memory jumbled in her mind. Kagome's nurturing treatment and gentle concern evoked scattered images of being cared for by another woman..._**her real mother**_, she supposed? The finer details of that woman's face and touch were unclear and it had been so long ago that it felt like a dream, another life. For a moment, Rin struggled to see if she could bring it all back, hoping to make sense of it all, to put everything in order. She quickly found that she..._**couldn't**_. _**Would the same thing happen to her time with Sesshoumaru-sama? Would the wonderful days spent in his care someday fade beyond recall as well?**_ Overcome with grief, she buried her face in her hands and wept.

Kagome reacted instantly, reaching to cradle her in a fierce hug. "Shhh, it's okay, we'll take care of you!" She ran a soothing hand over the girl's brow. "You'll come back to the village with us. You'll be with other humans again. You'll start a new life, make new friends, find people who'll love you..."

At those words, Rin felt as though heart were burning anew. That was the problem. She didn't want just anyone to love her. She wanted...

_**Something she could never have.**_

With a deep breath, Rin turned from away from Kagome sharply, ashamed of her telling emotions. This wasn't something she could expect the miko to understand anymore. After all, SHE had her hanyou; SHE had just won everything her heart desired.

Kagome sighed in frustration, very annoyed with herself. Obviously, she had said the wrong thing. Rin had become very distant again, lost within in her thoughts. Her rigid posture, Kagome reflected now, was strangely reminiscent of Sesshoumaru's: disconnected, aloof and oddly detached from the world around him. Of all people, this bright young girl did not deserve such sorrow! _**Maybe**_, the miko thought, _**maybe she shouldn't have tried to be so positive about the already uncertain future? **_What this girl really needed was time to adjust, time to come of out this sadness that weighed so heavily upon her.

Kagome distracted herself by casting a critical eye over at the young woman's soiled kimono. It was blood-soaked and burned, simply not fit to wear anymore. Surely, she could find something more suitable for Rin tucked among the extra clothing in her back-pack. Well, at least till they returned to Kaede's home. "Here," she offered, producing a pair of soft flannel pajamas from her bag. "Would you like something new to wear? These aren't much, but they're clean."

Rin eyed the strange material dubiously, but quietly accepted the gift and dressed in silence. As she fumbled with the unfamiliar buttons, Kagome reached for the discarded, ruined kimono lying on the forest floor. The miko prepared to cast it into stream, only to be stopped by a harsh cry.

"NO...don't throw it away! Sesshoumaru-sama gave that to me!"

Kagome looked down in surprise and smoothed the fabric across her lap for a closer examination.

_**Sesshoumaru gave this to Rin?**_

Of course, she would have expected the taiyoukai to provide for and outfit his young ward, but there was something **MORE** to this once-beautiful gown. It had been crafted of the finest silk, the material more suited for a young hime than a simple servant. The sleeves and collar were intricately embroidered with winding images of lotus flowers, and the over-all color was a delicate peach that washed towards a light sunset-orange at the seams. No doubt about it, the colors would shift and blend together so beautifully when she moved...or Kagome corrected, _**in Rin's particular case**_, when she scampered and danced! The priestess snuck another quick glance at the young woman's fair complexion and soft features, realizing that the petal-light shades were the perfect complement to the glowing highlights in her hair and gentle eyes.

There was simply no denying it, Kagome noted. This dress had been specifically CHOSEN with the EXACT details of Rin's personality and countenance in mind.

That could only mean that a much greater deal of thought and consideration went into Sesshoumaru's selection than she would have believed possible from the cold demon. The miko's eyebrows arched in suspicion. _**Was something else happening here?**_

Kagome was quickly snapped out of the intriguing direction of her musings by an impatient voice calling from the clearing.

"Oiiii! Kagome!" Inuyasha was bellowing out to her. "We have to get moving! We have to find out about Miroku and Sango!" To her surprise, the hanyou's demand was quickly followed by the cranky voice of Totosai. "Yeah, and I still need to talk to the girl!" the old demon shouted. Kagome couldn't help but notice that his tone had grown increasingly impatient, irritated and raspy after all the time spent alone with Inuyasha.

Rin rose, her fear evident on her white face, and for a moment, Kagome wondered what she would do if the girl suddenly bolted. But, _**this was it**_...there was no delaying anymore.

Kagome took a quick step and paused expectantly behind the young woman. "Are you ready, Rin- chan?" she asked, searching her brain for any last way to ease the young woman's anxiety. _**Gods, the girl couldn't have been more than sixteen, seventeen at most...it was hard to tell with that petite form! Whatever her exact age may be, she was still much too young to look so sorrowful!**_

But then pain and grief seemed to be an unavoidable part of life for those living in the Sengoku Jidai, even more so for those tied in with the hunt for the Shikon No Tama. _**Hadn't her own love for Inuyasha and her many adventures here in the past forced her to grow up just as quickly, too?**_

From the corner of her eye, Rin watched the miko as she seemed to disappear within her own thoughts for a moment. Despite the strange resentment that had flared through her a moment before, she was still so very grateful to the older girl. So much had happened, so much had changed over the past few days, and it was a relief to know that at least someone seemed to care about her fate. She nodded to Kagome, hugged her damaged kimono to her chest, and turned to follow the priestess slowly back to the main camp.

* * *

"Ahhh...there she is!" Totosai beamed up at Rin as she came back into view, motioning for her to join him at his place at the fireside. "Been waiting to meet you again, young lady!"

Rin advanced slowly and folded to her knees, situating herself comfortably within the fire's warm circle. Warily, she raised her teary eyes. "Nan desu ka?" she asked in a timid voice. **_Just who was this bug-eyed old demon that spoke as if he knew everything about her? How did he know about her past?_**

"I'm sure you're wondering why I'm here, girl, or even who I am, for that matter," Totosai began easily, as if reading her thoughts. "Anyway, I'm an old friend of your master's Father. Sort of promised him I'd keep an eye out on these troublesome pups of his from time to time."

Inuyasha snorted, his shoulders shaking with rude laughter. "Yeah, and you've been a **BIG** help, old man!" he interjected sarcastically. Quickly, Kagome nestled beside him. She gave the hanyou's thigh a light squeeze, warning him to settle down and allow the old demon to continue.

Totosai pouted and reached up with a long claw, cleaning his sooty ear as he waited for Inuyasha to cease his outburst. The half-demon barked out a rude laugh, trying to feign indifference to listening to whatever the old man had traveled so far to say. Long minutes passed till his curiosity got the better of him. Finally, he shoved his hands in his sleeves, crossed his arms in a huff, and turned his head away. He stuck out his chin stubbornly and lifted his nose in the air. "Keh! **I DON'T CARE!** Keep talking, you bag of bones!"

Totosai, it seemed, was only too happy to resume with his speech and turned immediately back to Rin. "Anyway, I've been listening out for you, missy, ever since the days I first heard another human had actually been revived by Tenseiga. NEVER thought it would happen again once the sword came to belong to Sesshoumaru! Not the most compassionate soul, now is he? Egotistical little hound!"

Rin's eyes widened in surprise (and no small amount of awe, too). **_Just who was this demon who dared to insult Lord Sesshoumaru?_** Instinctively, she scooted away from him a bit, as if half expecting her great master to come tearing back through the tree-line again to tear out his throat! **_Really! To utter a disparaging remark about Sesshoumaru-sama!_** _**Totosai**_, she realized, _**either had to be very strong or exceedingly foolish.**_ Her meandering thoughts were suddenly interrupted again, her musing halted at once by another loud question from Inuyasha. "Wait a minute!" the hanyou was growling. "So you're saying THIS girl was brought back by Tenseiga...just like my mother was?"

Totosai rolled his eyes. _**This was going nowhere.**_ "Yes, boy, both your mother **AND** this young lady have been revived by Tenseiga's power!" His voice rose to a hoarse shout in his exasperation. "Kagome, can you put a muzzle on this one!"

The hanyou bristled and turned as red as his haori, for the moment absolutely speechless. As usual, it didn't last long. "Fuck off! Keh! And I'm not stupid, you old coot," he grated. "It's just hard to accept my brother doing anything so...noble. I can never figure that bastard out." His white ears pinned flat to his skull and he petulantly kicked at the fire, sending bright sparks flying.

Totosai nodded in quiet understanding, keeping his gaze fixed on Rin. "Well, of course, Sesshoumaru didn't really KNOW what he was doing when he saved this young girl. Arrogant boy never stopped to inquire about the sword! He was even less interested in learning the full power of his birthright than another certain, NAMELESS someone." The old youkai shook his head sadly. "Tenseiga doesn't just revive the dead. If used properly, it can cheat death altogether."

All eyes, all shadowed faces around the fire, fixed on Totosai with an equal mix of interest, dread and confusion.

Surprisingly, the first person to speak again was Shippou. "So, then... did Inuyasha's otou originally commission the sword to keep his okaa with him forever? To keep her alive and by his side, despite her human life span?" he blurted out, blushing a bit when everyone's attention rested squarely on him. In the contrasting light the kitsune's green eyes only looked even more mischievous and feral. He turned those eyes to Rin now, biting his lip and offering her a shy, friendly smile.

"Well, yes...and no...gods," Totosai stammered back, clearly agitated. "Arghh! All these interruptions are making my head hurt! Can you people just let me finish my story!" His breathless rant led to a bout of coughing...a bout of coughing that didn't cease until a jet of red hot flame burst from his mouth, pouring down to scorch the grass at his feet.

Both the hanyou and the kitsune cringed, looking sufficiently chastised by the old demon's outburst, while the women jumped back in full shock.

But the sword smith merely cleared his throat, choking up three large puffs of smoke as he continued on. "Hmph - actually, the Inu no Taisho had first approached me about the possibility of forging the sword some years **BEFORE** meeting Izayoi. It had been right after he lost his first wife so tragically."

Totosai's jaw snapped shut suddenly as if afraid he had spoken too much.

Inuyasha's eyes gleamed in the dark and he barked out another harsh laugh. "Oh no, **NO**, no, no...old man! You're the one complaining about interruptions! You're the one who wanted to talk! There's **NO** way you're stopping the story now. Keep going."

Totosai looked very uncomfortable, but grudgingly resumed his tale...

"Your Father and Sesshoumaru's Hahaue knew each other all their lives," he began, setting surprisingly into the soothing rhythm of a practiced storyteller. "Yes, she was a full Inu-Youkai as well. Not too many of them left, weren't too many to begin with after all! Matches were arranged in the higher clans back in those days, and those two were betrothed practically since they were whelped! The Western lands were actually her birthright, as well as the crest of the crescent moon."

The old demon smiled fondly at the memories. "The Inu no Taisho and Sesseika-sama grew up to be both the best of friends and worst of friends...constant competitors, and near rivals in power, always pushing the other to be stronger! Heh! But though they squabbled like children they were always the first to turn in defense and support of the other should someone else have anything to say! She was just as fiery, bold and ambitious as him, a proud taiyoukai to the core...you didn't want to cross her! As savage and ruthless as could be in a fight! They cared for, respected and, yes, loved one another, but I don't think they were very much...ummm, 'in love', I suppose. They were more like over-protective siblings than soul-mates, really and they lived in a demon's fairy tale, a cocoon of security and power. They were too close, for they had no stories to tell the other. All they had was the same sheltered background and the same shared memories. They did what was expected of them...waged war, conquered more territory, brought down their enemies, defended their homelands, and produced the perfect heir. But sometimes... I think they still felt they were strangers to one another,and they had run into some limitation that could not be defined. They believe in a future together, yet their dreams were far, far different. But they stayed together, living according to the accepted rules and seldom did anything out of the ordinary for a great taiyoukai! Well, until humans came to the west, that is. Sesseika-sama was fairly ambivalent towards them, tolerated them on her lands and all, but only provided they showed proper respect...both to her AND to her son. For **THAT** was the true love of her life...she did everything for that boy!"

Totosai shook his gray head sadly, and when he proceeded with his story his tone was noticeably quieter. "Inu no Taisho, as you all obviously know, felt differently about humans. He was fascinated by them. He was fascinated by the way they adapted to the world around them, thriving without power or youki. He recognized pretty early on that they far outnumbered demons. He thought that by offering them aid and protection he could maintain the peace. He was always racing off to patrol the borders and secure the local villages and crop-fields. And that's when it happened: The demon Ryukossei returned to the west to challenge his power and found no one at the stronghold but the mistress and the Inu no Taisho's perfect young heir, Sesshoumaru. The boy wasn't much more than apup then...didn't even have the power to transform. Sesseika-sama could have fled...she was **no **fool, and must have known that the vicious dragon was a foe way beyond her power to withstand. She could have saved herself, but only if she abandoned her son. No mother would do that, an Inu-youkai least of all! She was fiercely loyal to that which she loved." Totosai finally paused. "Much like the boy she ultimately gave her life for, I think," he added in a whisper that only Rin could hear. She looked up at him in bewilderment, her vision misty.

Totosai cleared his throat again. "Anyway, the Inu no Taisho returned in time to drive Ryukossei off, but he was too late to save his mate. And that's when he had the first thoughts of finding a smith to forge Tenseiga...never wanted to lose anyone he loved like that again. After all, he DID really lose his ENTIRE family that day."

"But Sesshoumaru...Sesshoumaru survived," Inuyasha stated, his face an unreadable mask.

Totosai quickly cut him off with a disdainful flick of his wrist. "Sesshoumaru's heart died with his mother that day. I don't even want to know what he witnessed. A true fight between taiyoukai is a terrible thing to see, especially if one of the combatants is someone you love, and you're incapable of defending them. I'm sure the boy tried though." He raised a knowing eyebrow and waggled a bony finger under Inuyasha's nose. "Probably yet another reason why he resents you so much, Inuyasha. In the end, you came to eventually kill the creature that he himself was powerless to stop. A creature that took everything from him."

The sword smith took another deep breath. "So, Sesshoumaru was never quite the same. He loved and admired your Father too much to come out and blame him...hell, he didn't have too; the Inu no Taisho already blamed himself enough as it was! Nevertheless, everything changed between them. For though Sesshoumaru wouldn't directly fault his grieving father, he **DID** choose to lay all responsibility for his mother's death on something else: the 'pitiful, whining' humans his father so adamantly insisted on sheltering. So Inu no Taisho came home less and less. He couldn't stand to be in the place where it happened, constantly reminded of his failure. He took to spending most of his days in the local settlements. Over time, he found a way to comfort his heart with the beautiful daughter of a local noble, a young princess from a line he had watched over for ages. This, unfortunately, only served to further estrange him from his only son..."

Biting nervously at her own fingernails, Rin listened in rapt attention. She was learning more about Sesshoumaru-sama's background in the space of an hour than she had in all the years she had traveled with him. No wonder he didn't speak of the past! _**No wonder he held humans in such contempt...in his mind, they had cheated him of the only happiness he had ever known.**_ She leaned forward expectantly to focus on the rest of Totosai's account...

"...Of course, this sweet young woman who eased the Inu no Taisho's grief and healed his sadness WAS only human, and destined to be parted with him by the advance of time. Humans CAN sometimes become demons, as you know, but usually only if consumed by too much sadness and pain, or, like Naraku, just plain wickedness. In doing so, of course, they tend to lose a lot of their souls. Your Father didn't want that for the Lady Izayoi...so he traded a great deal of his own strength to power a sword that could transfer some of his youki to her. After all, how could he watch a woman he had come to love, the soon-to-be mother of his second son, wither and die in an eye-blink? Kami...when he first told me what he wanted forged, I shuddered with fear...wasn't even sure it could be done! But regardless, I worked until I created the two swords...one to sustain his family against time, one to protect them from harm."

Totosai shifted to take in a long breath and poked at the fire with his mallet, fanning the coals. "But despite the Inu no Taisho's newfound love, his sense of honor still called for him to avenge Sesseika-sama. He was torn between his new family and their happiness, and the memory of the woman and son he had failed. You **CAN'T** live divided like that." The old smith cast the hanyou a meaningful glance. "Sooner or later you make mistakes. In the end, Inu no Taisho went after Ryukossei...and, well, you all know the rest."

They sat in silence for a moment, the only sound in the clearing the crackling of the dying fire.

Finally Kagome spoke, reaching out to clasp Inuyasha's hand as she asked her first question. "But, wait, if you don't mind, Totosai, there's something I don't understand. If Tetsusaiga can kill one hundred at one stroke, what about the Tenseiga's supposed ability to raise one hundred with one stroke...you can't seriously tell me that the sword has the power save and grant near "immortality" to that many victims? And what if the 'victim' isn't human? What if it's a demon?"

Inuyasha smiled down fondly upon his clever woman. _**Leave it to Kagome to come up with such thoughtful queries. **_He leaned forward, anxiously awaiting Totosai's next answers. Not being on the best terms with his half-brother made him eager to learn of any weakness he could exploit the next time they inevitably crossed blades...

Totosai didn't look flustered in the least and responded to the miko's pointed questions with ease. "Yes, well, there are rules to the sword... different levels of mastery. Just as Inuyasha has developed his skill with Tetsusaiga, so, too, could Sesshoumaru with Tenseiga. If he was to...let's say...revive a battle-field, the combatants probably wouldn't have ALL that extended of a new life. I guess it all depends on how much youki goes into the strike. Such an act as I just described would probably call for a tremendous sacrifice from the youkai wielding the sword. Sometimes I think it may be a GOOD thing Sesshoumaru is so cold-hearted! Probably would have accidentally sucked the life right out of himself if he'd gone around experimenting with the Tenseiga blindly, the same way Inuyasha used to rattle Tetsusaiga without a clue in the beginning! Heh heh," he added, noting the scowl on the hanyou's face. "Sorry boy, I couldn't resist!' All at once he was deathly serious again. "But – when you concentrate on one victim, like Sesshoumaru did with this young lady over here, the results are rather surprising. Tenseiga will work by actually binding the life of the injured or dying human to the youkai it chooses as its master." The sword smith waved a dismissive hand again. "It's a lot easier for Tenseiga to revive a demon...after they're brought back from that Other World they have their own youki to sustain them, so NO bonds are formed."

"Wait," Rin breathed, finding herself compelled to interrupt at this point as well. "Stop! You're not suggesting that I now have a youkai's life span!"

"Not exactly," Totosai mumbled, fidgeting and scratching his chin nervously. "YOU have Sesshoumaru's life span."

Rin gasped and fell back into stunned silence as Totosai continued to explain. "So long as he lives, so too will you. But should Sesshoumaru be killed, the tie of his power keeping you in this world would break..."

"And...and I would die again," she finished for him quietly.

Totosai fixed her with a grim look. "Well, maybe not right away, you might linger for a bit, like Lady Izayoi. I still don't know the sword's full power, but I guess a couple of months, a couple of years at most? Sometimes, I think Izayoi only lasted as long as she did out of sheer will-power and the need to be sure her son was ready to take care of himself. Not very different from Sesseika-sama in the end, I guess." He paused, turning back to the hanyou now, taking note of his over-bright eyes and pained expression. "Well, I've said what I needed to and I thank you, boy. I know it was hard to hear, probably should have told you most of this stuff years ago. Things might have been easier for you." The ancient youkai rose to feet, his old bones creaking and his joints popping loudly. "But I guess I've stayed long enough and we'd better be on our way."

"**WE?**" Inuyasha echoed, blinking up at him in surprise.

Totosai yawned and then slanted him a droll look. "Of course 'we'! Just me, Momo, and that nice young girl there." He pointed a blackened claw at Rin.

**_"Nani?"_**

Totosai tugged at his beard as he paced back and forth nervously, seeming completely returned to his scattered old self once more. "Oh dear, see what you did, mongrel? All of this babbling and I didn't even get around to the whole point of my little visit! So, what do you say, girl? Would you like to come with me, at least till you feel better and figure out what it is you want? I don't have much, but I could teach you a trade and offer you shelter. It's too lonely on my mountain anyway...could use the company for awhile."

Rin opened her mouth in surprise and then snapped it back close with a pop. Inuyasha, once again, seemed more than happy to do the talking (or in this case shouting) for her. "Sesshoumaru put her in **OUR** care!" the hanyou roared. "He wants..."

"Your aniki doesn't know WHAT the hell he wants!" Totosai laughed. "Besides, it's high time that someone let the girl decide her own fate anyway!"

At those words, Rin's mouth went painfully dry and she could do nothing but stare into the firelight in shock. She fidgeted uncomfortably as the others awaited her answer. **_Should she go with this bizarre old demon? _**she wondered. Kagome had spoke of a chance at a new life in her village. She could go with the miko, see if Kohaku and the taijiya were alright...but...

She took a steadying breath..._**gods, she had never been ASKED to choose her own path or make her own decision.**_ She was suddenly afraid...**_what if she chose wrong, like that last night with Sesshoumaru-sama?_**

Rin turned and unexpectedly met Inuyasha's gaze. The hanyou was staring back at her intently, pinning her with amber eyes that were so similar and yet somehow completely different from her master's. _**Could she really follow the half-demon, and live out her life in his shadow, his very presence a constant living reminder of all she had come to lose?**_

Her decision was made.

Totosai had already hopped onto Momo's back, displaying more agility then she would have expected from something so ancient, and offered a knarled hand to assist her to do the same. Rin didn't need for the invitation to be extended twice. There was simply no way she could go with Inuyasha and Kagome, to live out her days in some human village...just another anonymous young woman tending the fields, surrounded by all those strangers.

Totosai was beaming. "Good girl," he whispered in a low, kindly tone. "Come on then...we have a long journey ahead." The sword smith shifted his head and nodded a farewell to the still fuming hanyou.

Rin leapt up onto Momo and tried to lock her knees against the fat bull's rounded girth. _**Gods! The old beast seemed a thousand times wider than Aun!**_ Dimly, she wondered if her legs would ever work again after their ride. _**Just how far they were going anyway?**_ As the youkai plodded forward at a lumbering walk, she suddenly remembered her manners and smiled down wearily at the worried Kagome. "Thank you for trying, Miko- sama," she murmured.

There was an abrupt, stomach-plunging lurch and then she was forced to grip Totosai's thin shoulders to keep from falling. _**Oh dear, was this the bull's gait?**_ Her answer was confirmed in the next instant as Momo leapt again, pulling them into the air rather gracelessly. He rose so awkwardly, dipping above the tree-tops as if gravity were about to seize him and force him down to the earth at any moment.

With all the bouncing and plunging, Rin was not feeling brave enough to loosen her hold on Totosai and offer one last wave, so she settled for casting one last look over the figures rapidly retreating behind her instead. She hoped it was enough.

As Inuyasha, his friends, and her old life faded away behind her, the girl turned her head to stare sadly off into the west. Silently, she wondered just what exactly her master was doing now.

Whatever he was up to, wherever he was, she hoped he could find some peace...

* * *

**Author's Note:**

I've always wanted to tackle a bit of a "back-story" for Sesshoumaru. Hope this idea wasn't too lame. Sess always strikes me as such a deliberate and calculating persona and so I always imagined there'd be deeper, more legitimate reasons for his hatred of Inuyasha, besides simply wanting daddy's sword! Also, I wanted to sort of characterize his mother as powerful and loving. I've seen so many fics where she's portrayed as some sort of bitchy, cold fish. Anyway, standard legal crap...don't own any of these characters, just my lame attempt to give Sesshoumaru's mom a name and a personality! Speaking of the name, the kanji we were thinking of all put together mean: _**"Flower that destroys life"**_. Dorky, I know...but when I have I not been dorky?

**WARNING: **

**DANGER, DANGER, DANGER! Hide your eyes, protect your innocence...**

**Chapter 5 has naughty language and GASP, a mildly "limey" situation! Had to add it though, especially considering all the latest Kagura/Sess interactions in the manga! **

**Besides, I like Kagura...she's a tough chic and she deserves a reward for all her trouble!**


	6. Chapter 5

Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan

_**This chapter slightly edited to conform to Fanfiction Net's Rules about Adult Content. Looking for the full chapter? Then mosey along to Media Miner (though, you really won't be missing all that much!)!**_

* * *

**Chapter 5: Wasuretamae**

**

* * *

**

Sesshoumaru glided quickly back through the forest. That utterly bizarre chapter of his life when he traveled with a small human was over. No more questioning glances, no more struggles to find an explanation. The girl would be among her own kind, and his world would go back to normal. Rin was out of his life, and no longer his responsibility. Now he could simply forget. This was exactly what he wanted…_so why didn't he feel better?_

A familiar scent drifted through the breeze, causing him to pause. "Naraku," he growled. _No, wait, _he corrected in his thoughts. There was a subtle difference. Something undeniably feminine coupled with an angry, slow-burning rage. The aura of a creature kept chained and imprisoned. He knew that scent anywhere. _**Kagura.**_ Sesshoumaru slowed and immediately turned in the demoness' direction.

His eyes narrowed as her form finally came into view.

The demon woman lay concealed in the shadows of a towering yanagi tree. Her breath was labored, and her hands clutched at a gaping wound that extended across her shoulder and down her abdomen.

Kagura scowled up venomously as she watched the taiyoukai's slow, stealthy approach. "What can I say?" she called out. "Guess I underestimated that miserable wolf-pup!" She shrugged, the action causing her rent garments to slip down her white arms, baring her rather generous chest to the taiyoukai's gaze.

Sesshoumaru watched as both her lips and her winged eyebrows quirked. In the next moment, however, her casually cynical expression had suddenly changed back to deadly. "Once again, my lord, looks like you've managed to get yourself a peek for free," she growled, gesturing down to her breasts and struggling to rearrange her torn clothing. "Show's over. Now keep moving, **kono yarou**!" She attempted to raise her fan in warning. The demon lord threw her a clearly un-amused look.

"You are...**as ever**...in **NO** position to order me around," he countered. His hand traveled down towards the ties of his hakama with exaggerated slowness.

Kagura licked her lips and raised her eyebrows again, this time rather suggestively. "Very interesting proposition, darling, but clearly, you can see I'm in no condition for _**THAT **_kind of fun right now!" she laughed sarcastically. "Another time, perhaps?"

Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes at her bawdy attempt at humor. _Ama! The impertinent bitch! _He finished reaching down, seeking for his swords, and not for the bindings of his clothing as the wind sorceress had suggested. Quickly, he drew Tenseiga from the crude sash he'd fashioned from his own ruined haori.

Kagura scooted back in reflexive fear, the bark of the tree behind her digging uncomfortably into her already battered flesh. "So that's the...the Tenseiga?" she breathed, feeling a bit awed from the power she sensed radiating from the blade. "You needn't bother, you know...I'm dead anyway. All thanks to that bitch, Kikyou!" She seethed and spit and railed on, tapping her fan on her knee to the angry rhythm of her words. "Now Naraku knows I was aware of Inuyasha's 'little secret' with the New Moon and that I didn't tell him. Plus, I let that pompous ass, Kouga, escape with his damn jewel shards! Even if you 'help' me to heal, oh great Sesshoumaru-**SAMA**, it doesn't change the fact that Naraku STILL holds power over my life!" She closed her eyes, sighing in defeat and general indignation. "Maybe it's better this way...better to die than remain a slave to the likes of him!"

"Be silent this instant, you foolish woman," Sesshoumaru commanded, sweeping out to slice cleanly through her torso with Tenseiga despite her last protest. Kagura gasped at the strange heat coursing through her body. The demoness watched incredulously as her deep wounds knit back together under a haze of white light.

"Why? Why did you help me?" she asked with wonder.

Sesshoumaru did not reply at first, not entirely sure of the answer himself, only smugly certain that his interference would serve to further infuriate her master. "Get up, bitch," he finally intoned. "Naraku will not kill you. You amuse him far too much." He turned and started to leave.

Kagura glowered after him in resentment at being dismissed so casually. She was already trapped by one evil demon, and it burned her pride to think she might now hold some kind of obligation to another. She could take care of herself, _damn-it_! Her sharp claws dug into her own palms, drawing pitch-black blood. _**She was supposed to be the wind, for fuck's sake!**_

"Tell me," Kagura called out, not enjoying the prospect of feeling indebted to Sesshoumaru in the slightest. "Is that **ALSO** the reason why you keep the sweet little girl? Just what manner of _**'amusement'**_ do you derive from her, my dear Lord Sesshoumaru?"

The handsome demon snarled, and re-materialized before her in an eye-blink, seizing her throat roughly. Despite the lack of oxygen, Kagura managed to choke out a harsh laugh. _Truly, that little comment was truly worth the temporary pain! She had never seen the taiyoukai this angry and unbalanced before! And all from simple words! Ohhhh_, Kagura gasped in her own mind. _**This could be so, so much fun...**_

Sesshoumaru glared down into the wind witch's flushed face. "That ningen no longer travels with this Sesshoumaru," he remarked smoothly. "You would do well to remember that."

"Hontou ni? Really?" Kagura brought up her delicate hand to trace the crimson stripes on his wrist. "Well, if you were looking for ways to reduce the number in your pathetic little entourage, I would have suggested ditching that filthy toad instead...revolting thing, isn't he? Where the hell did you ever find him, anyway? What rock was he hiding under?"

Sesshoumaru continued to stare down at her, his face nothing more than an empty mask.

Kagura swirled her fingers against the steely softness of the taiyoukai's skin. "So, the girl's gone, huh?" she whispered, here tone bland and conversational, as if she were totally unaware of her current precarious position. "Probably for the best, she **WOULD** have gotten killed one of these days, doubtlessly in some **VERY** messy way! Far too trusting and, gods, **SO** naïve it bordered on stupid..."

Though he had ignored her last jibes, now Sesshoumaru reacted instantly to Kagura's casual mocking of Rin. "If it wasn't for that 'stupid' girl, **YOU** would be dead," he rumbled. "Or have you forgotten how she saved your miserable hide after your crushing defeat by Goryoumaru!"

His hand tightened automatically, claws pinching inward and starting to draw her blood...

Kagura burst out with a garbled laugh. "_**Ohhh**_, my lord! Temper, temper!" she chided.

Sesshoumaru blinked in shock, instantly regretting his words and actions. He felt his cheeks going hot at his own uncharacteristic outburst. _**Had he really just felt compelled to defend Rin yet AGAIN?**_

Kagura continued laughing, the sound a mixture of equal parts malice and disbelief. _She'd actually hit a nerve! _her mind cheered in triumph. _Her taunts had actually forced an impulsive reaction from the cold, unflappable taiyoukai! Simply delicious_, she mused. She'd never seen the stoic demon lord this flustered, and she was thoroughly enjoying the prospect of riling him further.

Despite the unmistakable warning squeeze from the claws at her throat, Kagura sidled up against Sesshoumaru seductively. "Naraku may hold my heart now, but who knows?" she whispered. "Maybe, when this is all over, **YOU** can hold it instead." She extended herself onto her tip-toes and trailed her hot tongue along the underside of his jaw. Sesshoumaru's expression darkened at the bold contact, but he remained neutral, neither pushing her away nor encouraging her into further action.

Kagura reached up slowly to ease his long fingers from her throat, dragging his large hand lower, bringing it down to close on a very full, and still very bare, breast. Simultaneously, she moved to run her free palm across his chest, wanderinglower and lower still. "_**Hmmmm**_," the demoness murmured appreciatively, eyes lighting with unmistakable desire. She sank to her knees before him; fingers tangled in the bindings of his clothing, fully prepared to see if she could coax him into a more impassioned response...

Sesshoumaru groaned. He reached out to support himself on a low hanging branch, momentarily debating whether or not he should allow his body to give in to the blatant call of his demon instincts. Though he would never be able to fully relax his guard with the treacherous bitch, it would be so easy to simply take what Kagura was so deliberately, so wantonly, so freely offering.

With a snarl, he drove his fingers into the simple bun holding her hair, pulling her head back to look down into her lust-filled ruby eyes. He suddenly found himself wishing that her eyes were a flirtatious, shy brown instead. The thought was immediately followed by an intense longing to meet a gaze that was serene and tranquil, instead of one so bold, covetous and corrupt.

He gasped, and shook his head quickly to rid himself of the all too familiar face that had suddenly forced its way into his mind and invaded his thoughts.

"No," he hissed, pushing the wind witch away firmly, ignoring the heavy scent of her arousal in the air. "This will not occur. **Dame**!" He stumbled back and moved to rest for a moment, sliding down against the tree where he had initially found the demoness. He offered her a wave that was both curt and elegant, the gesture made in the practiced motion of a lord quite used to dismissing servants, a gesture meant to be **instantly** obeyed. Strangely exhausted, he turned and rested his head in his hands.

Kagura masked her disappointment rather well, rising to her feet with a small pout and a casual shrug. But inwardly, she smiled in triumph, recalling the mere seconds when Sesshoumaru's eyes had flown wide and his uncharacteristic look of pure panic. She reveled at thoughts of the emotions she had almost succeeding in dragging from him. She reveled in the memory of his expression, full of self-loathing and discovery and, _**yes**_, even the tiniest bit of fear. It was an expression that he somehow managed to smooth from his face almost as suddenly as it began...

"What's the matter, love? Not thinking of **someone else**, are we?" she jeered, offering a knowing grin. Growling, Sesshoumaru peered up at her through a screen of his long bangs and Kagura knew if his look could kill like his poison claws, she would have withered and died on the spot.

"So...what will you do now?" she finally asked, fanning herself with bored indifference.

"That is none of your concern," he replied darkly. "It never was and it never will be."

Sesshoumaru suddenly rose to his feet and Kagura backed away, instinctively knowing she had exhausted the limits of his patience and hospitality. But the taiyoukai walked past her without so much as a nod, as if he had already forgotten her presence.

He paused when he reached the edge of the clearing. "Return to your master," he commanded, not even offering a backward glance. "Naraku is an arrogant fool who may yet accidentally reveal his weakness to you. Only be sure to tell him this: our fight is far from over. When I am finished he will wish he **NEVER** learned this Sesshoumaru's name."

* * *

Within the hour, Sesshoumaru strode imperiously back into his own camp, interrupting Jaken's frantic pacing. The toad froze, seemingly paralyzed with fear. He was so frightened, in fact, that he even forgot to spout the declarations of fawning praise he normally offered at his lord's return. The customary rumble of greeting he always received from Aun was also noticeably absent. The beast chose instead to remain silent, staring forlornly into space with its twin heads tucked on its paws. With an undignified squawk, Jaken threw himself before the taiyoukai's feet, bulbous yellow eyes blinking up at him in consternation.

"This humble vassal," Jaken began nervously, flinching up at the taiyoukai's stare. "This humble vassal does not presume to question his most **EXALTED** master, or his actions, but wonders...where is Rin? We know she...ummm...has displeased your lordship greatly, and w-we couldn't help but notice your most awe-inspiring transformation last night." He faltered as if he couldn't even choke out his next words. "M-Master, you didn't...perhaps...d-devour the girl?" The toad looked like he might be violently ill but he continued on with a gulp, tapping his claws together in obvious distress. "After-all, it **IS** entirely within the your great power to so easily dispatch so lowly a ningen, but...s-she was a devoted servant, and I-I..."

Jaken found himself unable to finish his questioning, truly horrified about learning the answer to his sneaking suspicions. Aun's two head's rose instantly from their pouting, anxiously awaiting his master's response as well.

Sesshoumaru glowered back at them. "Jaken, **shut up**...the girl lives." The demon lord paused to smooth his downy pelt and brushed at a spot on his ruined clothing. "The hanyou has taken over responsibility for her well-being now."

Jaken's initial expression of relief that Rin was safe faded at the news of her current whereabouts. In his mind, he was unable to decide which fate was crueler...being snapped up in venomous jaws or being forced to endure the prolonged company of the insufferable half-breed.

"But...bu-but..." Jaken sputtered. He settled down as his lord cast him a dark look that clearly stated the subject was no longer up for discussion. "Hai, Master."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrows twitched with curiosity as he watched the tiny demon move away, completely dejected, the Nintojyou dragging in the dust behind him. _He couldn't believe this! Jaken was risking his 'terrible' wrath to inquire about the Rin's fate?_ The ill-tempered, cantankerous old toad had initially taken the most time to adjust to the girl's stubborn presence..._and look at him now_! Clearly, it would seem **HE **wasn't the only youkai in the group weakened by an insignificant slip of a human.

He could remember now how Jaken had originally struggled with Rin, discovering that the ruder he was in his treatment, the MORE the girl responded with kindness, composure and tenacity.

_And, if that didn't work, with sharp, biting wit_, Sesshoumaru noted inwardly, recalling the girl's obstinate nature and the limits to her patience. She simply wasn't the type who fell under bullying from anyone...with the exception of himself, of course. Unbidden, haunting images of Rin's face twisted in fear of his power and anger last night flashed through his mind.

But it couldn't be helped; he couldn't let her stay. He couldn't have her entertaining whatever childish fantasies were running through her mind any longer.

_Or in **HIS** for that matter! **Just how the** **HELL** **had she managed to invade his thoughts and interrupt what might have been a rather distracting, frenzied tryst with the wind-witch?**_ It was still beyond his ability to comprehend.

Sesshoumaru sank cross-legged to relax before the small camp-fire, as Jaken perched on an overgrown stump, his clawed feet sticking out at odd angles. No one seemed sure how to act. Their simple routine had been completely altered in the space of just a few short hours. Trying to re-establish some sense of normality, Sesshoumaru looked out over his servants with a haughty, aristocratic sneer. Three anxious faces gazed intently back at him, as if waiting for some signal, some cue on how to behave. Their blatant stares only served to further remind him that a fourth familiar face, the one with the pair of warm hazel eyes, was missing.

He suddenly found he would trade almost anything to end the awkwardness and monotony and momentarily debated lowering himself to engage Jaken in a conversation to break the spell of silence.

He growled, and thought better of it, choosing to wander through his own thoughts instead.

Though Rin was no longer a rambunctious, chattering child, if **SHE** were here now there'd at least be SOME commotion in the camp. She'd either be lost in one of her teasing little spats with Jaken, or maybe humming some calming melody. The girl truly did have a charming voice. He quickly chose to focus on something else. He didn't need that little song she had invented all those years ago to get stuck in his head yet **AGAIN**. _**Revoltingly catchy tune.**_

Though he was loathe to admit it, somehow watching and listening to her had become an amusing distraction, a favorite past-time. The way she reacted to everything, emotions changing on her face so quickly it was dizzying...she kept nothing hidden or disguised.

None of that mattered now, he reminded himself. She was gone and they'd all forget. Inuyasha may have his faults, (_many faults, he amended_), but at least his stubborn pride would ensure he provided a suitable new home for the girl. _And that saintly, annoying miko his brother had just taken as a mate! _She, too, would definitely do her best to help the young woman adjust. He snorted. _**Impudent, interferring little cow!** The self-righteous bitch probably had Rin's mind filled with pointless gossip and tales of his cruel nature! She was probably screaming like a harpy, screaming and cursing his name to the heavens already!_

He could almost picture it.

_Yes_, without a doubt, his little Rin would become the talk of whatever poor, squalid village the half-breed deposited her in. The exotic, fragile orphan stolen into the wilds by some blood-thirsty demon. He suddenly felt a trace of alarm..._what if they abused and beat her again? What if they didn't accept her and she remained an unwanted outsider?_

_No_, he realized, _that would never happen_. She was beautiful, kindly and graceful, and they'd all be won over instantly by her gentle, inquisitive nature.

**_Especially the men_.**

They'd be after her without a moment's pause, competing for her favor, contending for her heart, lusting for her body. She was so innocent and trusting, endlessly alluring, pure..._virgin_. His amber eyes narrowed. Not for long though. Those vile creatures would make sure of that. The thought of some filthy ningen male putting his hands on her, of tainting her sweetness, made his chest burn with unexplained fury. _Why did this matter? Let them have her! _She would eventually lose any 'charms' she possessed anyway, deteriorate, and grow feeble. She would bend with age, and a life full of labor, disease and suffering. Her silky hair would become brittle and white, her porcelain skin would sag from her worn frame in deep lines and wrinkles. Time would claim her and no one would remember her pathetic existence, least of all himself. He tried to force a cruel smirk to his face. _These wicked thoughts, these wicked thoughts should have been bringing him more pleasure... _

**Gods! Why was he still contemplating this AT ALL?**

It's alright, he reminded himself. It was only natural that he should still be pre-occupied with Rin; he had only just given her up.

He closed his eyes and sucked in a deep breath. _**Just concentrate on Inuyasha sealed and pinned to a tree, as the moss and vines grew all around him. Remember him just hanging there. Nothing more than a ridiculous, half-dead monument commemorating his family's ultimate disgrace. Think of the mold and leaves and snow littering his robes, and the years flying by. Remember Chichiue looking upon those ungrateful humans with compassion and mercy while he and Hahaue trembled before Ryukossei and received none. Just writhing in the dirt and the blood and the sour scent of their own terror. Think of Naraku mocking you...** _

**There**. **You HATE her.**

He rose quickly, surprising the lightly dozing Jaken.

"Okirou! Get up," he ordered; prodding the toad with his foot for emphasis. "We are going home."

* * *

**Author's Note:**

Yes, as you can tell the overall rating is climbing as I get braver! And, once again, sorry about the typos. I proof-read and proof-read but I always manage to miss something **COMPLETELY** obvious! I know what I'm trying to write, so sentences get stuck in my head and then I totally miss the mistake on the page! Oh well! I guess it could be worse.

Trying to update and move this story along quickly as it appears the Inuyasha manga is winding down to the Sengoku Jidai's version of Apocalypse Now. And I'm getting nervous about the very real possibility of character deaths (would certainly blow a few holes in my little tale should Takahashi have Sess or Kagura die next week!). NOTE: I actually decided to include mention of an incident in a recent installment where Rin helps pull Kagura from a stream after getting blasted by a mighty icky baddie...in case anyone was confused!

Oh, concerning Kagura - Couldn't resist throwing in that little bit of harmless, citrus fun. Don't worry though, no love triangles...we're forced to endure them so much in the actual series, I that figured I'd spare us all the aggravation, headaches, and screams of "BAKA, BAKA, BAKA" here. Sigh - someone BETTER end up with Sesshoumaru though. If he dies in typical vague-anime-anti-hero fashion I will scream. Who knows though? I might have to try the Sess/Kagura fic next!


	7. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6: Shinjitsu**

* * *

_She was running, scrambling madly through the forest on bare bleeding feet. Her clothes and skin were torn from catching on brambles and brushing against rough bark. The dark woods blurred into nothing but menacing shadows that seemed to be closing in all around her. _

But she had to press deeper. She had to get away. She tried to block out the noise of the creatures rapidly advancing upon her, tried to ignore their steady gain and the excited barks and squeals of predators clearly enjoying their hunt.

The wolves were going to catch her...**again**.

But there was something very peculiar. In this particular vision, she wasn't a small child anymore. She looked down at her hands: they were no longer those of a little girl. She suddenly felt a great swell of hope... for the first time ever, something was different! If the nightmare had somehow changed, could the outcome be altered as well?

Her fingers closed in a determined fist, and she felt renewed energy sweep through her aching limbs. Her legs were longer, she was quicker, her strength was greater! Maybe she could escape! She was almost there...

But, in the next instant, she had stumbled over that same damn twisted root crossing the trail, and the earth was rushing up to meet her. She impacted the ground with mind-numbing force, waves of nausea rolling through her body. Rin cast a quick, panicked look over her shoulder, immediately seeking her pursuers. Her eyes widened and she let out a small cry as she caught a glimpse of a lone wolf preparing to spring. She hurriedly began to drag herself back to her tired feet and it was then that she felt the jaws of the predator close about her upper arm. She screamed, both in terror and defiance, and tried to curl her fingers around to scratch at its eyes. The wolf responded by sinking its steely fangs deeper into her flesh and shaking her like a rag doll. Through the pain, she gritted her teeth, concentrating on maintaining her balance.

There's only one, her mind screamed. There's only one right now, don't let it pull you down, stay on your feet! This time it will be different! The dream has changed! I'm bigger now, I can fight!

She reached out with her free arm to scramble for any kind of weapon, a rock, a broken branch...anything!

All the hopeful thoughts of resisting disappeared, however, when she felt another crushing bite sink into her side. She saw a second pair of gleaming yellow eyes, and then another, and another. There was a deep howl, the mournful cry an undisputable invitation to draw the rest of the pack in to feed. In the end, it DIDN'T matter that she appeared older. It didn't change the awful truth. She was surrounded again.

Another wolf leapt at her, and she lost her footing under the additional weight slamming into her shoulders. Rin crashed to the earth for the second time, drawing her own blood as she caught her lower lip between her teeth. She found herself being dragged painfully across the rough ground as the wolves competed for position and the chance to be the first to sink their fangs into something vital. She instinctively brought her hands up in a last attempt to protect her throat and belly. There was an unmistakable tearing sound, and she knew they were killing her.

Suddenly, the wolves began to cringe in terror. Their shoulders hunched timidly, and some began to silently retreat into the tangled thickets with their tails between their legs.

**Wait!** This was never part of the nightmare either!

She brought her dizzy gaze up to see what had frightened them so, and saw a familiar figure advancing from the hazy tree-line. A familiar figure that she would recognize anywhere, a figure cloaked in white fur and an air of violence...

**Sesshoumaru-sama!**

She trembled with relief. She wasn't going to have to relive this pain anymore. He would surely save her. But the taiyoukai only paused and remained unresponsive, staring down his nose at the scene before him.

"My lord! Tasukete!" she screamed, her voice raw with confusion and betrayal. "Please! Save me!"

But he did nothing. She sobbed pitifully, reaching out to him, pleading, waiting. Just as it seemed certain, he was about to leave her to her fate, she suddenly saw that eerie energy build around him. She recognized its heat and malice, just as surely as the remaining wolves did. With terrified whines, the few that were brave enough to challenge the demon lord's arrival abandoned her altogether. Rin gasped and rose to her unsteady feet, looking up at him gratefully...

Her gratitude faded into terror when her gaze was met with savage, crimson eyes.

In the next instant, there was a flash of green light. Rin felt the awful burning of that strange glowing whip tear through her body and then belatedly heard a heard a loud crack. Despite the pain, she shook her head with a detached sort of awe: the weapon had reached her faster than its deadly sound had registered in her ears. Her arm hung limp at her side, tendons ripped, nerves completely destroyed. She could only look on numbly as he came upon her, nothing but hate and animal fury filling the evil red circles that were once his golden eyes. He pulled her up against him, crushing the fragile bones in her wrist.

Sesshoumaru drew elegant fingers against her chest. "Look at all the trouble you've gotten yourself into. All because of **this**," he mocked.

The inexorable, slow descent of his hand stopped over her pounding heart. "Omae no orokana ningen no kokoro. All because of your foolish human heart. This Sesshoumaru can burn it out or tear it out. Claws or fangs, Rin? Which would you prefer?" The seductive whisper of his deep voice only added to the cruelty of those sickening words. When she refused to reply, he continued on so very gently, "Lost your voice again, little one? Have you fallen mute once more? Or can it be that you would rather let me choose?"

Gods, he was smiling, biting his lip with an elongated fang to keep from laughing. In the next instant, his claws flashed and his handsome face was suddenly painted with a smattering of her own blood. A choking green mist rose before her eyes, and there was the surprisingly sweet floral smell of his poison...

* * *

Rin woke up screaming, ripping ferociously at her tangled blankets.

"_Shhhhhh_. There, there!" soothed a scratchy old voice. "Settle down, girl. That's quite a set of pipes you've got! Hope that's not how you're gonna wake up every morning!" The girl started in confusion, trying to remember where she was, her eyes finally focusing on the form of Totosai. The smith was smiling patiently down upon her as he dabbed a wet cloth to her forehead.

Rin gulped in deep calming breaths, feeling the clammy, cold sweat on her skin start to dissipate. "Y-yes, I sure hope so, too."

"Bad dreams?" he inquired pleasantly, mopping at her brow.

Somehow, Rin could sense he was not trying to force her into conversation. Somehow she knew he was not really demanding details or explanations, he was just seeking to offer her some much needed comfort and support. _Besides_, she thought ruefully, _the answer to his question was plainly obvious already. **Bad dreams, indeed...**_

"You could say that," she murmured after a moment's pause. "I've always had them. I guess from now on they're going to be a little different." She shook her head to clear the memory of the hate in Sesshoumaru's burning eyes and tentatively poked at her sternum, as if checking to see if her heart still beat within her chest.

Satisfied that she was still put together properly and in one piece, she took in her first glimpse of her new surroundings. She was in a little cave, a dark and empty, with a high vaulted ceiling that disappeared into blackness and shadow. Try as she might, she couldn't really remember arriving..._**here**_. Dimly, she wondered where here even was. Between all the physical exertions and emotional upheaval over the past few days, tracking her own travels hadn't seemed all that important and she had fallen into a deep sleep very soon after parting from the hanyou and his friends. _Strange_, she mused, _how much things had changed in so short a space of time._ She shook her head sadly, still not believing that she was really in a strange land, that she had really been cast aside...

Despite her heartache and fear, her natural curiosity began to reassert itself and she shifted to get a better feel of her bearings. Smiling gratefully at the kindly old demon tending to her, she gazed at the comforts of the unfamiliar room.

She found herself to be in a simple bed carved into the smooth rock of a cave wall. The air was humid and hot; there was a slight mineral smell, and the telling shimmer of water reflected on the dark ceiling. Steam rose periodically from the ground on the far side of the cave.

"Onsen?" she queried.

Totosai followed the direction of her gaze and smiled. "Yep." He swiped at her temples one last time, sloshing a bit more water onto her face than he probably intended to. He cackled merrily as Rin sputtered for a bit, then he deposited the cloth in a basin of cool water by the bedside and rose to his feet. "I suppose you'll be wanting a soak?"

The girl couldn't contain her sigh at the thought of finally being able to take a **HOT** bath, and nodded eagerly in confirmation.

The old demon shuffled on his way, pausing at a crooked crack in the wall the apparently served as the exit. "Well. I'll be down at the forge, young lady. Pretty easy to find, you'll be able to hear it for sure! And don't go wandering too much on your own! I have to warn you: this place can be tricky!" As if on cue, a harsh blast sounded from somewhere in the deep and Totosai offered a sheepish grin. He hurried nervously off to investigate the clatter, only to race back just as quickly.

"Oh, wait - I forgot! Here!" The sword smith's wrinkled hands offered up a half-opened parcel that contained a simple silk kimono of the palest green. "There. Thought you might feel more comfortable in this. No offense to the miko, but those weird clothes of hers all seem so **DAMN** itchy." He coughed, a tiny wisp of smoke escaping from his lips.

Rin lingered in bed for a moment, trying to suppress a small smile as she stared down at her new robe. Totosai seemed amazingly kind and thoughtful, but it sure would take awhile to not be disconcerted by his strange powers and loopy appearance.

"Arigatou," she whispered, wishing to offer up a small smile of thanks.

But there was no one there anymore.

* * *

Rin spent hours in the small spring in her new room pondering over memories, regrets, and the things she should have said or done. _Was that undead miko right? Had she been stupid and naïve this whole time? Had she given up herself, placed too much faith in a cold-hearted monster?_

She had only been trying to help, after all, and look where it got her! She furrowed her brow and tried to resent Sesshoumaru. She tried to be angry with him, staring intently at her reflection in the pool and forcing her lips into an uncharacteristic scowl. She quickly found that she just couldn't do it. Attempting to hate him only made the hurt worse.

Rin slowly ran her fingers through her unruly hair, and thought back over the years. It occurred to her that she hadn't had many conversations with the silent, stoic demon lord. Interactions were based on a sentence here and a sentence there, but not any smooth flow, or give and take. Everything was vague, clipped, and indirect.

Sometimes, he'd ask how she was feeling or if she was happy. Of course she would supply the answer only too eagerly, anything to keep his attention fixed on her.

Even for a moment.

She learned early on, however, that he wouldn't reciprocate. And when she would ask him her childish questions in return, he'd simply blink and walk away. Over time, she'd admitted defeat and simply stopped trying altogether.

Instead, she had contented herself with observing everything about him. The way his hair rippled when he moved, the peaceful look that came over him when he settled at night to gaze up at the stars, the wry smiles she would sometimes catch out of the corner of her eye...

_But didn't it seem that he did the same with her? Wasn't he always gauging her reactions as well?_

She paused, and chewed at a fingernail nervously. Despite his bored looks, Sesshoumaru-sama always **LISTENED** to her babbling, always remembered the little things about her. From time to time, she would receive presents of favorite foods and fine clothing in favorite colors. _And all those occasions when he'd slow his pace and drop silently beside her when her footsteps began to drag! What were they! All those times he'd call for Jaken-sama to make camp when they walked beyond the measure of her endurance! How could he have known? How could he have known her limits or her preferences if he wasn't REALLY paying attention!_

She fondly recalled those few months every year when they'd return to his ancestral home, a beautiful, low-standing fortress seated on the very edge of the ocean in the Western Lands. She recalled the way he used to accompany her down the steep trail to the beach when she wanted to look for pretty shells or wished to watch the gulls nesting in the cliffs. A sad smile touched her lips. She suddenly remembered how angry he'd been the first time she went rushing out into the waves, shrieking her laughter and practically dancing in excitement. She remembered how quickly he caught her and his patient explanation that the sea was **NOT** like a stream as he dragged her back to the safety of the house. He was always reprimanding her for being too bold.

_But_...

Even after she'd grown much older (_and become less prone to impulsive, potentially fatal actions_), he'd still silently follow her down to the shore. Rin remembered that strange expression that would appear on his face when she would lift her robe out of the tide, exposing pale legs to splash in the foam.

_**That look. Like he --- like he wanted something.**_

She stopped herself. She was imagining things. She was only choosing to believe what she wanted to see.

That life was apparently over now anyway. She'd have to dismiss it from her thoughts. And if what she'd been told about the Tenseiga last night was true, she'd BETTER start learning to let go; otherwise, she'd become mad with grief. The prospect of a long, **LONG** life with nothing but this empty ache filled her with dread.

She leapt to her feet in agitation._ How could she be expected to forget when every extra year of her life would remind her that HE was out there somewhere? Alive, content and existing perfectly well without her! _

And, on the opposite end, if any harm were to befall him, would she instinctively know? If he were brought down in battle, would she be aware that her 'borrowed' life was running out? Would she feel herself slowly slipping away, fading into nothing but a forlorn walking ghost like the hanyou's mother? Rin worried her lip and tapped her fingers together, an annoying, impulsive habit she had picked up from Jaken-sama. She paced the length of her new room, pausing to kick the strange clothes she borrowed from the miko into the shadows, feeling a small measure of satisfaction at the tiny rebellious act.

_**What if! What if?** What if Sesshoumaru-sama found out about her, found out that he had inadvertently let some of his great power slip to sustain a lowly ningen girl? What if he..._

**_Wait._**

Rin's eyes became impossibly wide and her hands shot up to muffle the involuntary gasp escaping her throat. She suddenly had the most frightening of thoughts, and a single, burning question moved in to occupy the forefront of her mind. And there was only one person who knew the answer to that question, there was only one person who knew whole truth. It was time to end her brooding and search out Totosai again, she realized.

She needed answers **NOW**.

Rin dressed swiftly, and then crept quietly from her room. She moved into a narrow, darkened corridor, her small feet pattering against a strangely warm floor. Every once in awhile the ground would rumble and shake, and she would have to reach out to brace against the walls to steady her steps. The scent of smoke filled her nostrils and the constant drip-drip of water continued to echo all about her. She turned into the first doorway she found, and stepped into an adjoining cave. She immediately crept back out again, quickly discovering that room she had entered was blanketed from floor to ceiling with a living carpet of hibernating bats.

_This place was more than a little creepy_, she decided.

A few more twists in the halls, and she finally found herself a large, strangely bright room. She cried out in amazement, pausing to marvel at the amazing collection of weaponry displayed on the walls. She thought briefly of Sesshoumaru-sama and his long-ago quest to secure a smith to forge Toukijin. As she looked over the rows of gleaming katana and armor, she somehow knew he would be just as awed as she in this place. She gave a sad sigh. _Of course, predictably, Sesshoumaru-sama would most definitely try to conceal his fascination with a bored sneer!_

Rin quickly abandoned the weapons chamber, continuing onwards and into a massive open cavern that housed a mighty foundry. Broken bits of demons hung everywhere, suspended from hooks, dangling from the walls and ceiling. It was more than a little morbid, really. Fangs and claws, and skulls and hides, as far as she could see, all of them lining the benches, and pressed into iron cauldrons and vats, stacked and overflowing from the corners. The young woman wrinkled her nose suddenly wondering if she would be more comfortable in the room with the bats.

Just beyond the forge the cave opened to the outdoors in a wide, sunny shelf. Rin hurried past all the intriguing objects littering the room, eager to feel the sunshine on her cheeks. She paused near the entrance of the cavern, surprised to find herself standing in the jaws of some huge, long-dead taiyoukai. She peeked cautiously through the rows of fangs and down over the ledge, looking over a bubbly sea of lava and steam and twisted black basalt to a gorgeous green valley that stretched far, far below. The rising sun was just starting to burn off the morning fog, and in the distance she thought she could see a small lake. "Sugoi!" she breathed.

"Ah! You're up and about!" chirped an overly cheerful voice behind her.

Rin let out a surprised shriek and whirled around. Her hands flew out and she stumbled, knocking a mallet from its hook and setting off a chain reaction of tools tumbling from the walls, echoing down into the dark.

"Oops," muttered Totosai sheepishly. "Well, here's your first task of the day: clean that up."

Rin panted, and waited for the din to die down before beginning to bend to restore the tools to their rightful places. She was really rather thankful, actually. A chore would occupy her mind. It would hopefully keep some of her nagging doubts at bay. _Maybe, just maybe, that was the old demon's intention all along?_ She smiled. It seemed increasingly clear to her that Totosai's absentmindedness might really be a great act.

But she could not waste time dwelling on the mysterious old demon's intentions or his mental state. She needed to find out what he really knew. Now that that she was face to face with him again, her mind would not let go of that final terrible question, and she could not allow herself to be swayed again. She dropped a small adze to the floor with a clatter, and opened her mouth to speak...

But, once more, Totosai was one step ahead of her. "Wait, wait, girl," he shouted, silencing her before she could even form a word. "I thought you might like something to eat first!" He beckoned for her to follow, leading her to a low, broken table in the corner that seemed to function as both a work-bench and dining area. Until the moment that the demon held a bowl of rice up before her famished eyes, Rin had not even realized how hungry she was. She nodded in grateful acceptance, and raced to join him.

Totosai shifted over to offer additional space for her, hastily sweeping ash and tools from the table's surface. Rin's eyebrow arched as he handed her a sooty pair of chopsticks. "I'm sorry! Eto! For the mess." He chuckled warmly. "Don't usually entertain young ladies up here, you know!"

"Ano...me too...sorry for wrecking all your," Rin struggled painfully to find a word to describe the clutter. "Ummm, stuff." She reached down and wiped her chopsticks on a piece of clean cloth she had managed to scavenge, hoping Totosai did not think she was being rude. Unable to ignore the call of her growling stomach anymore, she immediately began ladling the deliciously hot food into her mouth. "I'm still a little j-jumpy, I guess," she explained, her words garbled between those first perfect mouthfuls of rice.

"It's okay. I imagine you've got some important things on your mind, girl."

"Hai, Totosai-sama. I did actually think of one more question."

"Only one?" the demon asked with a sly wink.

Rin smiled shyly and shrugged, not wanting to appear too anxious and demanding. "Well, it seems like the most important one right now." Sadly, Totosai's teasing nature was beginning to remind her a bit of Jaken. But she forced herself to hurry on, before her emotions clouded over what was left of her ability to reason. "Jii-sama, you said Tenseiga 'borrowed' some of Sesshoumaru-sama's power to revive me, and that he doesn't know it. If he finds out, and b-becomes angry, can he..." She paused and shifted on her knees, nearly losing her nerve to continue. "Could he..._**maybe**_...take it back?"

Totosai suddenly seemed way too interested in the position of the sun. "Oh my, look how late it's getting! Better hurry with your breakfast! Got a lot of cleaning up to do, missy."

"Please, sir. I need to know," she insisted, now wringing the fabric of her koromo in a white-knuckled grip.

The old demon's shoulders slumped.

"Did you love him?" Totosai asked quietly. "Did you love that arrogant fool?"

"Love him?" Rin felt a sharp pain in her chest. "How could I **NOT** love him!" she cried. "He was everything I had!"

"Then you might not want to hear what I have to say," Totosai mumbled sadly, staring off into the distance.

"Onegai?" she whispered, though her heart screamed that she already knew the answer.

"Yes," Totosai confirmed, with an emphatic nod of his head, "Yes. Sesshoumaru can draw back the youki, and take back the gift of your life. He'd simply have to strike you once again with the Tenseiga and will it so. You see, Tenseiga **CAN** kill, but only those it's saved before. Those old wounds of yours would open, your blood would spill, and you would know that same agony as when those wolves first attacked you. Only this time, it wouldn't be a dream," he added in knowing reference to her early-morning nightmare. "But, since you love him, I have little doubt your grief would be more unbearable than your pain: for, of course, Sesshoumaru would have to stand before you to do this. His face would probably be the last thing you saw. I don't know much about the boy, but he does have a reputation for cruelty. Believe me, more than anyone I understand his reasons for hating humans, but...I don't know, girl." He trailed off and looked down at his iron-stained fingers and picked randomly at a torn thread on his burned sleeve. As if he didn't want to meet her eyes.

"So, that's why you really couldn't leave me with Inuyasha?" Rin whispered, finally understanding the truth. "You don't want him to be able to find me too quickly."

Totosai nodded. "Sesshoumaru and Inuyasha are tied by blood and part of each other's destinies, no matter how much hate and betrayal flies between them. They'll keep crossing paths, and swords. Swords that I was asked to make for them. And, eventually, Sesshoumaru will come learn the truth about you. I can't guess what he'll choose to do when he finds out, but my conscience would rest easier if I knew you were somewhat safe till then." He reached out and laid a warm hand on hers, offering her a reassuring pat. "It'll be a lot harder for him to track you here than if you're just wandering in the open with that hanyou and Kagome!"

With a sudden flourish of energy, Totasai leapt to his feet and thumped his chest, bug-eyed, proud and grinning like a crazed lunatic. "I've **never** accepted a commission to suit Sesshoumaru's dark purposes before," he boasted happilly. "So he has no reason to come to my mountain! Heh, heh!"

Rin shook her head at his bizarre antics, feeling so overwhelmed. Totosai seemed mighty pleased with himself, clearly taking some perverse pleasure in the thought of causing frustration for her former master. _Her former master_, she thought. _Former. **No more.** Gods, she wanted to sob_...

"Try to be happy, girl!" She vaguely heard the sword smith words as he continued to offer his counsel. "I KNOW in my mind that you somehow managed to touch his heart. But will Sesshoumaru come to view that as a blessing or a curse? Of that, I'm not too sure!"

Rin pressed her lips in a tight line, trying to fight back the tears which threatened to spill, so sick of advice, so sick of needing, so sick of not knowing, sick of remembering the **hate **in Sesshoumaru-sama's eyes...

As if sensing that his small companion was fast approaching an emotional breaking point, Totosai swept back down into the dust to kneel beside her, pulling her close. "I'm sorry to do this to you. I'm sorry to tell you all this. To hurt you even more. But you'll always need to remember, Rin," he warned, clasping her trembling hands in his own again. "You may have the life-span of a youkai, but, **NEVER forget**...that **DOESN'T **make you one. You have no power, no title, nothing that a great taiyoukai like him would covet. You're human, and I don't know if Sesshoumaru can let go of his hatred for your kind."

"My kind? If I have his life time...then are they my kind anymore? Just what has that damn sword turned me into?"

Totosai sighed and shrugged his thin shoulders as he backed away, realizing he could offer the girl no more comfort. Any peace she found now would have to come from within. He sunk into the shadows with a weary groan, his ancient face lined with wrinkles and guilt. "It was pride that drove me to make that sword for the Inu no Taisho. It was selfish of me.Just asit was so **very** selfish of Sesshoumaru to keep you for all those years. He should have let you go."

Rin turned to stare at the steam pouring forth from a great iron cauldron, bubbling and hissing in the pit of the forge. For an instant all she wanted to do was crawl inside it, crawl inside and let the fire burn her into nothing. "But, in the end, he did let me go," she murmured bitterly.

Totosai closed his tired eyes and followed her gaze down to the flames. "Yes," he whispered eerily. "Only far too late, I fear."

* * *

The journey west had proved short and uneventful, and in no time at all, Sesshoumaru found himself before the coast and the arched gates of an elegant compound. Despite the tragedies that had occurred here, despite all the bitter memories, this was where he felt most like himself. Besides Inuyasha, and his Father's heirloom swords, this once great stronghold was one of the only remaining links that tied him to a long-gone, nearly-forgotten past.

As was usually the case when he returned from a long journey, he was forced to stop and dispatch the lowly demons that had tried to set up residence in his absence. This time, however, killing those intruders didn't seem to be as much of a nuisance as it always had in the past. This time he was actually pleased to find those foul, nameless demons feasting at his gates. He was grateful for their distracting, though short-lived sport, grateful for the chance to spend some aggression. _**Fools**_, he thought as he watched last the mangled corpse burn away under a blast of his poison. _No matter how far he wandered, no matter how long he drifted, he would always return to the place of his birth_.

Sesshoumaru marched through the walled courtyard and into the darkened home, dry leaves billowing into the genkan behind his heavy foot-falls. He kicked off his boots and allowed what little remained of his armor to fall to the floor at the doorway with a resounding thud. No matter, Jaken would attend to it later after he finished stabling Aun.

He hadn't been back here for nearly five months, and, as such, slowly made his way through familiar corridors adorned with painted tapestries of his father's great victories, seeking to re-learn every detail. For an instant, he remembered the very hallway he was standing in filled with acrid smoke, the walls groaning and creaking under the crushing weight of Ryukossei's coils and the pounding of bare feet on the wooden floor as his mother raced to drag him from harm's way. He could remember being terrified; not of the cold, laughing demon high above him, but from seeing abject horror in her golden eyes for the first time. He could still hear her scream at him to flee, could still see her ashen face before she reverted to her true form and her futile, bloody charge. The snarls, the blasts of fire and acid, and the final sickening crunch of bone as Ryukossei's jaws closed over her throat.

Sesshoumaru stopped suddenly and glanced to a room on his left, pausing reverently to view Hahaue's weapons and armor displayed in the family shrine. No honorable 'phantom grave' for her: the mighty Sesseika had fought till her power was utterly spent and Ryukossei had brutalized her until there was nothing left to mourn but those few tattered scraps of fangs and metal. Sesshoumaru lowered his head, long bangs concealing any emotion in his eyes. He'd have to burn some incense for her later.

But first, he needed rest. His fingers trailed down the ragged tear in his haori, feeling the rapidly healing skin beneath.

Sesshoumaru reached his bedchamber all too quickly. Without knowing the full reasons why he found himself wandering past his own door, and making his way down an alcove to the tiny room he had given to Rin. Quickly, he slid the paper screen aside, his breath catching in his throat as too many scents and memories threatened to assail him once again.

He had not entered her chamber since she had come to live with him and now he looked curiously over the simple possessions she had come to collect here. Predictably, there were hundreds of dead flowers and seeds drying on bamboo racks by the windows. And scattered on a low table was a vast array of pretty stones, bleached starfish left behind by the changing tides, a myriad of seashells, and bits of broken coral...

_**Pathetic**. _

**In this great house, full of battle trophies and riches, THIS is what she 'treasured'?**

The strong ocean wind stirred up some papers, and he curiously bent to examine them. He paused at her delicate handwriting, remembering how her eyes had brightened when he'd ordered Jaken to teach her to read and write. He scanned the first few lines and let the pages fall from his hands.

Hasty drawings, snippets of songs, and notes on the flowers she had intended to plant in the garden come spring. Plans she had made never knowing she'd not be returning here again...

Sesshoumaru turned to leave, then changed his mind, moving instead to the small futon where the girl's scent lingered the strongest. Gently, he sank down into the mattress, fanning his long, pale hair around him with a sigh. He stared up at the ceiling, intrigued to be sharing the same view she had experienced for all those years. _If only sleep would finally come and claim him...now! _Before he could stop himself, he had rolled to clutch a pillow in his claws. He held it to his face, breathing in more of the enticing fragrance surrounding him. _This doesn't matter_, he chanted in his mind, turning further into the soft blankets. _She's nothing. You hate her. You hate her so much_.

His flexed his claws viciously, just wanting to tear the memories out of his mind. It was then that his fingers brushed against something concealed beneath the satiny fabric of the pillows, something fragile and dry with age. _Another piece of parchment?_

His fingers closed around the small slip of paper and he drew it up from its hiding place for closer scrutiny. His eyes widened in instant recognition. _**Three little characters: Sesshoumaru.**_ His own name, written with shaky brush strokes, and coupled with simple little sketches of the crescent moon...

Whatever peace he had managed to find in this place was gone.

_**Did he ever truly have it to begin with, he wondered?**_

In the end, he decided it didn't matter. Some things could never change, and all he needed to do was to bury his heart again and become a better liar.


	8. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7: Tekiou**

* * *

Inuyasha scowled at the nicked blade of Tetsusaiga. That was the third miserable oni he'd dispatched during the course of his patrol that day. The reeking, witless beast had not been very powerful. It only managed to land a direct blow to the sword's edge by sheer dumb luck, right before its abrupt introduction to the Kaze no Kizu.

He smirked with some satisfaction, remembering its fiery demise.

_Damn_. Lately, these lesser demons had been crawling out of the woodwork, as was usually the case when Naraku vanished from time to time to regroup and plot. The hanyou scowled and flicked his ears in annoyance. He didn't really like to think all that much about it. He could easily deal with the rise in these petty little distractions, but had come to HATE when his arch-nemesis became this quiet. Nothing good EVER came of it.

**EVER.**

But Naraku wasn't the only one missing now. _There was...Kikyou too_, he thought suddenly. The undead miko had NOT returned to trouble him since that horrific battle nearly two months ago. Inuyasha still felt the icy stab of betrayal when his mind focused on the emptiness he had seen in her eyes that night. He had no doubt she was still close at hand, and still very much consumed by the bitterness in her heart. Only about a week ago, in fact, he HAD awoken to the eerie glow of Shinidamachuu trailing mournfully around the Goshinboku. He had scented that telltale odor of graveside soil…

But, despite her blatant call, he had not ventured out to investigate. He'd only had to look down at Kagome slumbering peacefully beside him, before he simply resettled back into the blankets, pulling her warm body closer in an instinctive, protective gesture.

Inuyasha had found he was simply not interested in Kikyou's answers or explanations any longer. The past could not be changed or erased. Out of loyalty to the memory of how she used to be, he decided he would continue to grant a certain amount of sympathetic leeway to his former lover…

But **ONLY** provided she kept at a safe, respectable distance from him.

Never again would he stop to wonder how it could have…_or should have_…been for them, had Naraku not maliciously interfered in their lives. He would NOT live like his Father, blinded by his guilt until the tragic past consumed him.

He would never seek Kikyou out again.

Inuyasha shook his white mane to clear his thoughts. These days, things had settled back into a pleasant, if not guarded, routine at the village. After the battle, they had quickly reunited with Sango and Miroku, utterly surprised to find Kohaku alive and in their care. Inuyasha remembered listening in shocked fascination to their tale of escape…how his brother's woman had actually helped them to flee.

_Rin. _

What a strange girl, he mused. How the hell she managed to keep her sense of kindness and compassion while living under the influence of Sesshoumaru and that scabby toad Jaken was beyond him.

Kohaku's major wounds had now healed more or less, though his arm remained in a sling. The young man still had trouble remembering the finer details of the past few years…_probably for the best_, the hanyou thought dryly.

He marched past the first village farms with a scowl, drawing Tetsusaiga again to re-check the blade, still not believing such a lowly demon had been able to damage it. He squinted to estimate the levelness and weight, sticking his tongue out in concentration. It REALLY was a small nick now that he got a better look at it…

But he just couldn't afford take ANY chances. With the threat of Naraku's inevitable return looming over his head, he couldn't have the sword in anything less then perfect condition. Plus, it really had been way too long since the blade had been sharpened. It was settled, and nothing could be done about it. This called for a visit to Totosai's mountain.

Inuyasha rubbed his jaw and grimaced at the very real possibility of having to donate another one of his fangs to the cause of repair. He desperately hoped it didn't come to that. At least Kagome would be thrilled at the prospect of the journey though. After all, she'd been after him for weeks now to make the trip to Totosai's forge to see if Rin was alright.

He sighed. Despite the possibility of VERY real, VERY intense pain when he reached his destination, this excursion could be a perfect opportunity to spend some time alone with his little miko. _Village life was far from private_, he noted sourly, as he passed the first cluster of quaint homes. He was met with the sight of Miroku trying to wrestle his wriggling daughter, Kaisei, into a warmer robe. The feisty toddler was being most uncooperative, apparently more interested in grabbing one of Kirara's soft tails then heeding her father. He caught the grumbled chant of "…omae no mama wa ittai doko e itte shimatta ka na…" repeatedly coming from his friend's lips.

The half demon couldn't resist throwing a look of mock-contempt to the exasperated man as he strode by. "Oi! Miroku…I see you're still having trouble with the ladies!" he snorted. The frazzled monk offered a string of expletives under his breath.

"I wouldn't tease, Inuyasha," Miroku called back. "The divine Buddha is not without tremendous sense of irony, and if he **AND** KAGOME have anything to say about it… you'll be chasing '**_pups_**' instead of jewel shards in the very near future! With that bit of wisdom, have a nice day, my friend!"

The hanyou paused in mid-step and stiffened. Kagome did spend very much of her time now giggling in girly conversations with Sango, offering to help with the baby, and asking pointed questions about pregnancy and childbirth. He wondered if he should be worried.

Inuyasha reached Kaede's small home at a decidedly quicker pace, the unmistakable voices and scents of Kagome, Shippou, Sango and Kohaku drifting from within. In typical grumbling fashion, he burst into the dwelling and tossed Tetsusaiga onto the floor of the hut. Nearly everyone jumped, turning their eyes up in surprise from their places around the cooking fire. Sango recovered from her initial shock the quickest, peering down at the still rattling blade. "Well, that crack is not going to get any better if you continue to abuse the sword!" she chided with her ever-present practicality. "What on earth did you do now?"

"Don't ask…fuckin' broke again," Inuyasha rumbled at no one in particular. His eyes softened as they traveled to meet Kagome's, offering the miko a less petulant, silent greeting. "Now I gotta go up and see that crazy old man," he continued, slightly more composed. "Kagome, get packed…we need to get going!"

Both Shippou and Kohaku's heads shot up simultaneously.

"Honto ni, Inuyasha? You're going to see that demon sword-smith, Totosai?" Kohaku queried. "I'd like to join you…if it's alright. I'd really like to thank Rin for what she did." Sango looked up, her expression knowing, and flashed her brother a gentle, supportive smile.

"I'll go with you, too!" Shippou chirped, looking at the other young man with a small measure of panic. "Ummm…ahhh…you'll need help, Inuyasha! What with all these annoying demons springing up all over the place, you know."

Kohaku turned in surprise, raising an eyebrow in slight suspicion at the copper-haired kitsune who'd become his fast friend.

Inuyasha snorted in annoyance."Temee…annoying demons, huh? And I got the worst of them right here in this room with me!" he snapped, pouncing at the fox. Fortunately, Shippou was quicker and bounced out of his reach. After all, years of brawling and mini-beatings had taught him all to well how to recognize the boiling point of the hanyou's patience.

Inuyasha growled, rather irritated that he had been denied his sport. He tried to stand his ground. "Not a fucking chance in hell, brats… you're staying here! Just me and Kagome this time! We need to travel **QUICKLY **so we can get back to the well before the new moon!" He stomped his foot for emphasis…_there, that should settle it_.

Ever since that night and their near defeat by Naraku, they had taken to hiding in the future with each occurrence of the new moon. Despite the fact that the evil half-demon seemed to be holding the majority of the Shikon no kakera, luckily it still appeared that he and Kagome remained the only ones able to make the journey through time. Though Naraku didn't strike him as the type to use the same trap twice, once again Inuyasha would take **NO** chances. A feral grin crossed his face and he folded his arms in smug satisfaction…**_wherever Naraku was, it must be frustrating him to no end to wonder where he disappeared to on the nights of his human transformation._**

Shippou did not appear to be swayed, and only crossed his arms in a huff. Kagome looked up at Inuyasha, then sympathetically back at the pouting kitsune. Though she was still not exactly sure of the young youkai's real age, his appearance was now that of a fifteen year old boy. _Her surrogate' son was nearly all grown up and showing an obvious interest in girls!_ she mused, with a small streak of pride. She couldn't help but remember how flushed and flustered Shippou had been the night they had first encountered Rin. _And Kohaku, too…he always seemed to be talking about her as well nowadays! **Interesting**_. She smiled, the natural instinct to play matchmaker swelling to outrageous proportions inside her. "It's okay, Inuyasha!" she shouted. "The boys won't slow you down…if anything, you should leave **me** behind!"

"N-nani! But that's n-not the point!" the hanyou shot back, trying to think of ways to hint some of the **REAL** reasons he wanted privacy without causing her embarrassment. Kagome, it appeared, was choosing to ignore his building tirade, and merely batted her eyelashes in silent pleading.

Both Shippou and Kohaku leaned forward eagerly for his response, knowing that Inuyasha was never able to deny Kagome anything when she fixed him with **THAT** particular expression.

"Arghhh! Whatever - gaki-tomo, get moving! Temeera…whoever's not ready to travel in FIVE minutes is staying behind!" the half-breed stomped out of the hut just as dramatically as with his original entrance, brushing past a confused Kaede as she came in from the garden.

"Ano ko," the old woman scoffed. "Whatever did I miss now, children?"

* * *

Rin paused in her carving to critically examine her work. Just a few more lines and she'd be able to present this completed iron mold to Totosai. She backed up to put some space between herself and the piece, trying to visualize what the design would look like on the finished helmet. A bright, blurry flash of red and white moving swiftly through the green valley below suddenly caught her gaze.

She shaded her eyes against the sun and stared down the mountain's winding trail. Three familiar figures were making their way up the steep slope at great speed.

_Inu…yasha? And…and his friends…_

_Oh, and make that **four** figures_, she corrected, finally noticing the miko clinging tightly to the hanyou's back as he bounded in great leaps from boulder to boulder. Casting one last look at the soon-to-be-arriving party, she hastily dropped her work. She raced to find Totosai, stopping quickly to shoo Momo out of her herb garden on the southern side of the ledge.

She found the old demon stoking the fire in the furthermost corner of the foundry. "OJII-SAMA!" she shouted over the din of his hammer and the roaring flames. "We have company…Inuyasha is here!"

"Eh?" Totosai grumbled. "What's that? Can't hear you!We havea bumble-bee...Heh! Your new dress has a tear?"

"NOOOooo! NO! I SAID...**INUYASHA AND A FEW OF HIS FRIENDS ARE HERE!**" she yelled again, waving her arms wildly.

The smith's wrinkly face turned white and he dropped the kabuto he was mending, racing to the archway just in time to meet said hanyou as he skidded to a sliding stop at the threshold. Without a word of greeting, Inuyasha drew the Tetsusaiga from its sheath and lay it on the ground in front of him.

"AAAAaaaaIIIeeeEeee!" Totosai wailed, wringing his hands and hopping madly back and forth on the tips of his toes. "What did you do to **MY** sword, you stupid, flea-bitten mutt!"

"Nice to see you too old man," Inuyasha countered sarcastically. "And shut up! The damage is NOWHERE near as bad as last time! Now are you gonna piss and moan all day or can you fix it?"

Totosai snapped his jaw shut and wiped an actual tear from his eye. "Give me that **NOW**, boy!" he screeched, snatching Tetsusaiga up roughly and running his bony fingers along its edge. Every so often he would mutter under his breath about 'ungrateful, unappreciative, rotten little pups'. Inuyasha growled.

During the first few moments of traded accusations and scathing reprimands, Rin had positioned herself back amongst the shadows. Even though months had flown by, the sight of this half-demon still caused her chest to constrict rather painfully. She noted now that his features were not as fine as his elder brother's, but still...the family resemblance was undeniable. She prepared to slip silently down the corridor and make herself scarce until their business was concluded.

Yet something caused her to pause. She supposed she was being rather silly, actually. Though the hanyou's physical appearance might evoke painful memories of the life she'd been forced to leave behind, it wasn't right to be so rude. Rin turned and scowled at the half demon behind his back. _Maybe she could just ignore Inuyasha…take a cue from her old master's measured manner of dealing with the half-breed and pretend he didn't exist. _

**And…and hope you don't have to look in his eyes**, she chanted mentally, trying to push away the ache in her heart.

Just at that moment, Kohaku and Shippou walked up behind Inuyasha and Kagome, both boys eager and not wanting to miss a **single** moment of watching their mutual tormentor suffer under a few choice insults for a change.

"Kohaku-kun!" Rin shouted in near amazement. "You're alright! Yokatta!" Any lingering thoughts of hiding in her room were completely abandoned at the surprise of seeing her childhood acquaintance alive and well. She reached out to pat his uninjured arm in a warm greeting.

_Yes, this was a wonderful surprise! And instead of sulking, maybe she could actually learn some news of the outside world!_ Rin suddenly noted the underlying weary expressions on the traveler's faces, and busied herself with the task of preparing tea, completely missing Kohaku's blush.

The young demon exterminator followed in her wake, stammering. "Rin-san, I…umm… want to thank you. You saved my life and…and…my sister's too…I have my family back. You've always been so very kind to me, even while I was under Naraku's control."

Kohaku pulled up a slightly squished flower he'd concealed in the sling on his right arm and offered it to her shyly. From where he stood several feet away, trying to appear grown-up and casually aloof, Shippou's emerald eyes widened at the gesture and his lips turned in an unmistakable pout.

"Here...me, too!" the kitsune piped, pushing the other young man back a step in his enthusiasm. "I know you're sad…so this is from me! To cheer you up!" He held an acorn out to Rin. The girl reached for it slowly with a quizzical look. When her fingers closed around the strange gift, there was a loud pop, and the acorn suddenly blossomed into an enormous bouquet of wild irises. Kohaku threw Shippou a dirty, menacingglare as the young fox beamed; then, as Rin turned to coo over the flowers and find a suitable container, he kicked the kitsune in the shin. "Itee!" Shippou growled.

Kagome immediately raced over to intervene, stepping between the jealous boys. "This is **SO** not the time, kimi-tachi," she scolded, watching Rin's bemused and extremely overwhelmed expression. She gestured back at the Tetsusaiga, and the mission at hand.

Totosai rolled his eyes at all the juvenile antics, and turned back to Inuyasha. "Alright, careless boy, I can fix your sword. **AGAIN.** In fact, I think we should get right to fixin' it, so you all can get out of here and leave an old man in peace!" He picked up a set of tongs from the fireside and clicked them with obvious glee. The hanyou's face turned a strange shade of green, and he appeared almost ready to swoon. Kagome threw him a sympathetic look, squeezed his shoulder for courage, and then swiftly herded the laughing, pointing Kohaku and Shippou out of the cavern. She snorted at how quickly the boys had forgotten their temporary animosity in the face of watching the argumentative half demon fall into a state of sheer animal panic. _Not that she could blame Inuyasha for panicking…the mere thought of someone sticking those rusty old pliers near her mouth, let alone using them to yank out a tooth…was…**ghastly**._

Kagome settled easily on the wide ledge and looked down over the valley below, enjoying this chance to stretch after many long, cramped hours of travel. To her great surprise, she realized Rin had slowly followed them outside, obviously not comfortable remaining in the cave either. Clearly, she too, had witnessed Totosai's idea of 'dentistry' before.

Kagome flashed a smile that was nothing short of devious…_this was, after all, the perfect opportunity to see how Rin was doing with her new life!_ She cast a furtive look at her once-again temporarily speechless young male companions…_her young male companions who were currently **solely** engaged with gawking pointedly at a pretty young girl. And with wide, stupid open mouths and dumb, glazed eyes, too. Boys…so very stupid and so very predictable_. "Hey!" she whispered, careful to keep a cupped hand over her mouth. "You two, get out of here…I want to talk to her!"

"But...Kagooo**meeee**!" Shippou began, his voice actually cracking into the long whine of his youth.

"Not now! And I mean it!" Kagome interrupted with a hiss. "This calls for 'girl talk'! Can't you see she's still hurting? And I can learn more in five MINUTES than you guys could in five DAYS!"

"**Really**?" Kohaku whispered back, his dark and solemn eyes brightening with hope. "Is that true, Kagome-same?" He turned instantly on Shippou, tugging roughly at his arm. "Come on…let's go…besides, I need to talk to you about that little stunt you pulled in there! Just what the hell was that anyway! "

"What!" the kitsune asked with feigned innocence. "Surely, you don't mean the flowers?"

"Of course, I mean the flowers! Are you trying to make me look like an ass?"

Shippou puffed out his chest. "I don't have to try to do **THAT**! You do just fine on your own! Besides…I can't help it if I have some…_**skills**_…that the ladies appreciate."

"I'll show you skills, demon...I'll knock you back into the Heian era!" Kohaku challenged. And with that, the young men headed a little ways down the trail-head to continue their argument, still choosing to remain well within the limits of standard 'spying' view.

Though not the kind of privacy Kagome was hoping for, she supposed she would have to make the best of it. She grinned, remembering all the times Inuyasha had hovered jealously around her in that same manner (_especially whenever Kouga-kun appeared…**oh, weren't those fun days?**_).

Rin had presently settled down next to her, just relaxing in the autumn sunshine. The girl had returned to etching at an iron mold, and Kagome scooted closer to get a better look at what she was working on.

"That's beautiful!" Kagome breathed, admiring the intricate pattern flowing across the metal.

"Honto ni?" Rin asked timidly, and her sad eyes lit up for a moment in obvious pride.

The tentative beginnings of conversation and the relative peace were suddenly split by an uncannily canine yelp coming from back within the cave. Kagome winced in sympathy for her hanyou. And, back in the unseen, echoing depths of the forge, Inuyasha's voice immediately began to shift from yelping to bellowing out pain-muddled curses…

"Ummmm...yeah. So, how have you been, Rin-chan?" Kagome asked, simultaneously trying to keep the girl talking and her own mind distracted and well off poor Inuyasha's obvious distress and discomfort.

"I'm…alright," Rin responded carefully, attention switching between her carving and the angry yowls echoing through the air. "Totosai has been very kind to me, and I help him where I can. I usually can't assist with the swords. Most of them are made from the claws and fangs of taiyoukai. I can't touch them…their powers are **SO** strong and unpredictable!" She paused, setting down the mold and the pearl-handled blade held deftly in her tiny hands. "But, as you can see, Ojiis-sama…Totosai, I mean…he lets me carve designs into the new armor he crafts…I thought they were a little dull," she whispered on conspiratorially. "New demons come every week or so…"

Kagome's eyes were bright as she listened in rapt attention. T_his was encouraging…maybe Rin was going to be alright!_ She had obviously made some progress with her grief, now sounding almost as carefree as the little girl she had once been. It all changed in an instant, however, and the obviously fake cheerful façade vanished from her face. "Please, Miko-sama, have you heard any word about Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin whispered franticly, leaning close.

Kagome looked away sadly at the girl's plaintive tone. "No," she answered in all honesty. "Not since that night…when you …came to us…he's simply vanished. We've heard nothing. Seen nothing. Naraku has disappeared as well." The miko hastily tried to change the subject at the dejected look on the girl's face. "Rin-chan…are you happy? Are you **sure** this is where you want to be? I'm sure Totosai has good intentions but…it must get really lonely up here."

Rin sighed in quiet resignation and rested her chin on her knee. "At this point I can't imagine being happy anywhere," she murmured truthfully. "For now, this place is best."

"Well, of course, I'm not suggesting you have to **STAY** at our village…just say you'll visit one of these days! Think about it…maybe? When you're feeling better?"

Kagome's glance was suddenly caught by a flash of frenzied movement and the low buzzing of heated whispers. At the very moment she had extended that invitation to Rin, both Kohaku and Shippou had straightened and visibly brightened from their place on the next rocky outcropping. _The sneaky little kitsune was obviously picking up the entire conversation with his sensitive youkai hearing and sharing the information with the demon slayer! _

**Boys! Men!**

**Ohhhh...they were so...**

Oh well, at least they were cooperating again. Kagome cast them her best imitation of Inuyasha's most angry, withering look, before turning back to Rin. "So...whatdaya say?"

"M-maybe," Rin answered vaguely, deciding it was too hard to concentrate on anything with all these eyes staring expectantly at her. _Kami…these people were strange! And Kagome-sama was **SO** persistant! So garishly bright and bubbling and…annoyingly, obnoxiously...ridiculously cheerful… _

**Stop it!** Making fun of herwon't make you feel better! Besides...she's only trying to help you, she quickly reminded herself.

Seeming to sense her indecision, the older woman suddenly threw her a comically exaggerated pleading look, a perfect imitation of a child's wounded pout. The beginnings of a small smile tugged hesitantly at the corners of Rin's mouth. She had never really had **ANY** lasting female companionship during her life…_it **might** be interesting_. After all, she had an endless number of embarrassing questions, mostly just about being a woman in general. Rin somehow doubted the information she had been forced to glean out of a rather uncomfortable Jaken could be very correct. But before she could concede her defeat and offer a more definitive answer, Totosai emerged from the mouth of the cavern supporting the shaken Inuyasha. The hanyou held a bloody strip of cloth over his mouth, and wore a rather sullen expression on his rather puffy face.

"See? Not so terrible, boy. You were right…damage wasn't too bad. The sword's patched itself up quicker then you this time!" the sword-smith thrust the mended Tetsusaiga into the half-demon's trembling hands.

Inuyasha could only whimper.

"Hey boys!" Totosai called down to Kohaku and Shippou. "Anyone got anything to say to this bullying mongrel, better do it now…I don't think he'll be able to fight back, at least for a few hours!" The old man winked at Kagome as she shook her head and reached for Inuyasha's elbow to support him. The half-demon sighed and leaned into her gratefully, arm automatically reaching around her waist to offer a gentle squeeze. The miko smoothed his bangs off his forehead and pressed a tiny, lingering kiss to his brow.

Rin turned at the tender gestures, an unexpected wave of discomfort and jealously flaring hotly within her. _How many times had she longed to offer simple comfort like that to Sesshoumaru-sama?_ Her vision quickly blurred with unshed tears and she found she couldn't swallow. _**It just wasn't fair.**_ All she could see was that damn silver mane, and she suddenly found herself filled with the intense urge to just march up and slap that sappy, loving, puppy-dog look right out of those golden eyes. _Why…with the pain he was already feeling right now…she imagined even a blow from one so puny as herself would probably be enough to knock him unceremoniously onto his skinny little bottom! _

**Wait…**

Gods...what was happening to her? How could she even think anything so selfish and cruel?

Instead of giving into any mean-spirited urges and doing something she'd later regret, Rin opted instead to spin on her heel and race back into the forge. At the moment, she didn't care how rude she appeared or what these others would think of her; she just needed to get away.

She dimly heard Kagome's soft cry, but did not stop to look back.

* * *

Totosai trailed after the girl with his eyes and sighed in defeat. "Let her go, let her go," he murmured, as Kagome attempted to move in pursuit. "It hasn't been easy for her. Too much excitement for one day, I think."

"She fell in love with Sesshoumaru...didn't she?" the miko queried sadly, shaking her dark head.

The old demon nodded in confirmation.

Inuyasha's eyes widened in confusion and he stared after the path Rin had taken, suddenly seeing her in a whole new light. _**Poor, foolishlittle thing**_, he thought, trying to clear his head of the bitter scent of tears. Of all the cruel things his half-brother had done, he decided that this was the worst…keeping a human girl as some bizarre sort of pet, and isolating her from the rest of her kind. Abandoning her without a second glance when the burden to his pride became too great. If Sesshoumaru was going to cast her aside and reject her so coldly, maybe it would have been better if he had left her the way he originally found her. Maybe it would have been better if he never drew Tenseiga at all.

"Don't worry," Totosai murmured. "It'll all be okay." Noticing the doubtful expressions currently fixed upon him, he quickly added, "Trust me!" But neither Inuyasha nor Kagome appeared to be very convinced.

"Anyway, you better get going." The old demon gestured at the sunset. "Not too many days till the New Moon, you know!" Inuyasha kicked at the dirt with a scowl…_ What the hell? Did **EVERYONE** know about his little problem now?_

"You'll say goodbye to Rin for me?' Kagome asked, wrapping her arms around the hanyou's shoulders and gingerly climbing onto his back. She sincerely hoped he wasn't feeling woozy anymore. _Wouldn't that make for a hair-raising trip home!_ _Rides on Inuyasha's back were often scary enough already without these new concerns about him losing his footing due to dizziness!_ She didn't have long to worry though, and with one giant leap they were off, racing down to join Kohaku and Shippou.

Totosai watched the hanyou and his companions until he could no longer see them on the horizon then quietly made his way back to the cooking hearth. He smiled the very moment he noticed Rin peeking timidly from around the black fissure that led into the main hallway.

"I'm very sorry, Ojii-sama," she began, staring at the floor, her jaw taut. "I don't know what came over me."

Totosai's patient smile grew and he held up a torn strip of cloth that she might use to dry her tears. "It's alright, girl. It was brave of you to face them at all! Anyway, weather will be changing soon. Only about another month or so left for visitors to make it up here…then we'll have peace and quiet all winter."

Rin sighed, somehow feeling chilled to the bone at the mere mention of winter. _How would she ever survive it? And how…how could she ever repay this kindly old creature who had offered her a new home, a new life? Logically,_ she supposed the best way would be to stop whining, to try harder to accept all these changes. She moved to sit beside him at the fire and placed the teapot on the hot coals again. _Her emotions were bound to be out of control for awhile_, she reasoned. _**But…if that was how much it hurt to see Inuyasha, then what would she do if she was ever face to face with Sesshoumaru-sama again?**_

Her heart pounded. _No chance of that! Didn't Totosai say **HE** would never come to this mountain?_ She reached up and released her hair from the jaunty ponytail that served to keep her long bangs from her eyes. Suddenly she couldn't decide what was worse..._**being confronted by the cold taiyoukai, or never seeing him again?**_

Totosai noticedthe girl'sincreasingly somberlook and tried to offer some encouragement again. "Don't worry, young lady, it'll get easier, you know. In time."

Rin turned away, the shadows cast from the firelight suddenly making her appear much older. "Yes," she agreed. "After all…time is **all** I have now anyway."


	9. Chapter 8

Chapter 8: Arashi  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Deep autumn had settled on the Western Lands. It was a bitter season of raging storms and rain. Sesshoumaru loved it --- the dark weather was a perfect complement to his dark mood. Apart from the screaming winds that beat the shore, everything in the compound was SO unnaturally quiet. He lounged in bed, and tried to let the sound of the rolling ocean soothe him. As was usually the case in these dull, monotonous days, his thoughts automatically drifted towards Rin again. He remembered how these fierce squalls would excite her --- and would sometimes scare the hell out of her too!  
  
In the past, when the weather became this wild, often he'd wake in the morning to find her sleeping outside his room, curled in a blanket against his door. She had never dared to come in or rouse him with her fears, though. Now he wondered how he would have reacted if she ever HAD been so bold.  
  
His gaze traveled to his bedside table and over that small, telling scrap of parchment he'd found under her pillows all those months ago. He groaned. The longer he lingered in this house, the more questions arose. For instance, why had he let Naraku's words tear at him in the first place? Maybe they were too close to the truth, no matter what he tried to pretend. And why should it matter to him what that sorry excuse for a demon thought of him anyway? He was a great taiyoukai and beyond the petty judgment or contempt of his enemies! The girl belonged to him --- she was his to do with as he pleased!  
  
He reached up and massaged the insistent ache in his temple. But you did do as you pleased --- you pushed her away, when all she ever did was try to offer comfort and support. Why had he turned on her based on nothing but hollow, empty words? No one knew him like she did, no one trusted him so completely. It was strange --- until now, he thought he had a good grasp on the cringing and cowardly nature of humankind. But Rin was steadfast, stubbornly loyal and brave. He still couldn't believe that she had tried to stand at his side against a foe that would have sent many a demon fleeing in terror.  
  
Gods – he was going insane. He really should have forgotten her by now. How many months had it been anyway? Two, maybe longer?  
  
Whatever the case, it was apparently not enough, he decided sullenly.  
  
With a growl, he leapt from his large bed and hastily tugged his hakama around his hips. He pounded barefoot down the hall to her door, bowling over a rather surprised Jaken in the process. He yanked the screen open so violently that the wood cracked and fell from its track, and the delicate paper panels shredded under his claws. He entered the room with a snarl and closed his mind against the sweet scents that once again tried to envelope him.  
  
Sesshoumaru swiped viciously at the racks of drying plants, watching as they splintered and spilled their contents onto the floor. He reached down and back-handed her small writing table into the wall, offering a smug grin at the resounding crunch of its impact. He bent and scooped up whatever he could carry, resolved to be rid of these reminders once and for all. Armloads of her bedding trailed behind him as he dragged everything into a haphazard pile in the courtyard.  
  
There - he should have done this when he first arrived here.  
  
Jaken had recovered from his initial shock and trotted up behind him nervously. He saw his master so infrequently these days. Sesshoumaru-sama was always either sequestered in his room, or out exploring his lands in his canine form, killing any local youkai that dared to challenge his authority. As such, the toad was completely unprepared for THIS particularly strange shift in behavior. He'd never seen Sesshoumaru-sama so ---- frantic. "My --- my lord? Is everything alright?" he spluttered. The menacing youkai only grunted in response, and stared down at the mess he'd created, as if oblivious to the world around him.  
  
"My lord?" Jaken queried again. He tugged lightly on the fabric of his master's hakama in attempt to refocus his attention. Sesshoumaru's eyes snapped down angrily at the contact, and Jaken backed away a step in response to the heat in his gaze. The small demon instinctively raised his puny arm over his head, awaiting a blow that never came.  
  
The taiyoukai had gone back to ignoring him, staring intently at the odd assortment of Rin's personal effects. It was astonishing, he thought. Who would have known that the evidence of the girl's existence could be reduced to such a small collection of broken, useless junk?  
  
"Burn it," Sesshoumaru ordered with a sneer, pointing a sharp, clawed finger at the untidy heap for emphasis. Jaken's eyes widened in surprise and sadness, but he raised the Nintojou obediently.  
  
Sesshoumaru smiled as the flames roared forth from the staff. Despite the dampness of the ocean air, the conjured fire threatened to claim Rin's possessions rather quickly. Good. Soon there'd but nothing left. Every trace of her life in this house would be destroyed. It was all burning ---  
  
Fuck!  
  
With a growl he pushed his small servant aside, knocking the Nintojou from his tiny hands. The great demon appeared to be completely at war with himself. Every muscle was tensed for action, yet he was rooted to the spot, as if unable to decide whether he should allow the fire to continue to consume the girl's possessions, or stomp out the flames and salvage what remained.  
  
Jaken picked himself up off the ground and stared open-mouthed in utter bewilderment. He was rather ill at ease with his lord's bizarre, impulsive behavior. Sesshoumaru-sama was half dressed, his hair was tangled in the harsh wind, and his amber eyes were darting wildly with indecision.  
  
With no warning other than an angry snarl, Sesshoumaru suddenly spun on his heel and charged towards the house, racing back to his chamber. He NEEDED to get the hell out of here. The solitude and seclusion of his family home was not erasing his memories. The Western Lands were secured a thousand times over, and no creature of any significant power remained to offer future opposition. It suddenly occurred to him that perhaps violent action with GREATER prey might be all he needed to feel like himself again ---  
  
And that damned Naraku DID need to die for once again insulting his honor! A fierce growl rumbled from within his chest.  
  
Sesshoumaru snatched Toukijin and Tenseiga up from his bedside, enjoying the familiar weight of the blades in his hands after such a prolonged absence. He raked his fingers through his knotted hair, and decided that grooming the mass was a hopeless cause now. The youkai settled instead for pulling the fine, white length back into a simple ponytail. The style would keep it out of the wind and mud for now anyway, he reasoned.  
  
He allowed his gaze to wander around his chamber one last time, not knowing when he would return. His eyes came to settle on that little folded piece of paper again, and he reached forward to gingerly grasp it in his hand. This last sentimental memento of hers would be so easy to destroy as well. He could simply let the acid build at his fingertips and watch it dissolve into nothing but dust. Something inside his chest ached painfully at the thought and he found he just couldn't do it. Instead, Sesshoumaru carried the simple scrap of parchment down the empty hall and into the family shrine. Solemnly, he placed it among the collection of assorted objects honoring the memory of his ancestors.  
  
There. He would allow this one thing of the girl's to remain here, to become another part of the forgotten past. The expressionless taiyoukai slowly turned away.  
  
Sesshoumaru marched outside and strode commandingly back into the walled garden and courtyard. Jaken's trembling became even more pronounced when he saw the obvious and severe changes in his master's appearance. The little toad wisely chose not to comment on the dramatically altered look, but gestured up at the two swords instead. "M-My Lord, will we finally be leaving now?" he asked.  
  
"Iie. No, 'WE' will not be leaving, Jaken. You will remain here, until I have need of you." Jaken gasped --- was he being discarded now too? What had he done wrong? His voice trilled in a cry of protest, "But what will you do, Master? Where are you going? When will you return?!" The small demon wrung his hands and struggled to contain his sorrow.  
  
Sesshoumaru did not answer, having been distracted by his own reflection shimmering in the black waters of a small garden pond. He ran his hand over the fine fabric of a dark new haori and down to the blades at his hip. Something was still lacking ---  
  
Armor.  
  
Over the past two months, he had preferred to do his killing in his transformed state. As a result, he had not bothered to take the time to replace his imposing kikou.  
  
Now he had one stop to make before renewing his hunt for his enemy. He knew exactly where to go ---  
  
"Totosai," he mused out loud. Yes, that crafty old bastard had managed to deny him his services all those years ago. He would not allow the smith to refuse him again.  
  
Without further explanation, he was soaring off into the roiling winds surrounded in a swirl of his youki --- leaving the forlorn Jaken and the memory of a small human girl completely behind him.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The seasons had continued their rapid change much, much sooner than Totosai predicted. Rin now included sweeping snow from the ledge as part of her ever-growing list of daily chores. She wasn't used to the powdery stuff --- Sesshoumaru-sama had usually kept her and Jaken moving when faced with such weather. The snow had proved an amusing novelty at first --- she'd played in it, caught flakes on her tongue like a little girl, or simply watched in fascination as the wind set it whirling upon the mountainside. Now, she decided it was just plain bothersome and too damn cold! She looked down at the much warmer, still green valley below rather enviously.  
  
Her pouting was interrupted by Totosai's shouts. She dropped her broom and quickly hurried back inside to see what was causing his excitement.  
  
She found the old youkai hammering the finishing rivets into a most lethal and striking-looking new piece of armor. "Amazing!" she marveled, patting her mentor on the back. The demon that acquired this piece would doubtlessly be just as impressed as she! Rin smiled with pride as Totosai turned the dark armor around to display HER ornate metal scrollwork inlaid over the sode, chest plate, and haidate. She clapped her hands together and beamed.  
  
"I didn't do a bad job on that, huh?!" she said matter-a-factly, tipping back and rocking on her heels. Totosai shook his head, "Don't get too puffed up, young lady! You'll look like those two swaggering boys who were here last week!"  
  
Rin giggled, but his comment suddenly reminded her about a few questions she had been too embarrassed to ask for the past few days.  
  
"Ano, Ojii-sama, speaking of Kohaku-kun and the fox --- whatever was the matter with them anyway?! The way they treated me! It was so --- so odd!?" She blushed, recalling their strange smiles, and their even stranger actions. "Is there something wrong with me?" she asked. She reached out to toy with the decorative crimson tassels hanging from the armor's sinister spikes while she earnestly awaited his answer.  
  
"Well, what do you expect, girl! That's how young men behave when they're around such a beautiful young lady!" the demon replied with a knowing smile.  
  
"Beautiful?" she echoed, "Me?"  
  
"Yeah - pretty, beautiful, lovely, bewitching, gorgeous and all that other silly stuff!" Totosai laughed. "And it's not just those boys who've noticed! What about Lord Inoshishi?! That damn boar demon has 'broken' his sword three times this month --- I can assure you he doesn't make his way all the way up here to see this wrinkly old man!"  
  
Rin gave an indelicate snort. "He's broken his sword because he's a clumsy oaf, and NOT out of any desire to be in my presence!" she shot back.  
  
"I wouldn't be too sure," the aged smith teased in a sing-song voice. Rin threw a dusty cleaning rag at his head.  
  
Totosai grinned. "That's my girl!" he shouted, "Not the cringing thing I first met in the forest! Still not all the way there, but a vast improvement!" he added lightly. "Why, if I were a twelve hundred years younger ---" he trailed off with a sly smile.  
  
Rin rolled her eyes, grabbed another scrap of cloth, and began to forcefully polish the armor. She desperately hoped the vigorous activity would cause her to forget her self-consciousness and agitation. Men couldn't possibly be interested in her! Wasn't Jaken-sama always saying she was too skinny and short?  
  
Totosai stretched and made ready to take a short nap by the fireside. He noticed Rin's look of obstinate denial, and couldn't resist getting the last word in. "Get used to it, my dear! You ARE a pretty little catch! And I have a feeling the suitors aren't about to stop calling!" he mumbled as he closed his eyes.  
  
Rin paused in deep thought. She was pretty? Really?  
  
She had seen her own reflection often enough, but knew so few women that it was hard to find a basis for comparison. Images of Sango, Kagome, and even that angry demoness, Kagura, flashed through her mind. She had always thought each of them was attractive in their own unique ways. She felt a sudden inherent swell of girlish pride --- she was lovely like that too?! Her initial reaction was to flush with embarrassment, and she pressed her hands to her face to hide her rapidly warming cheeks.  
  
But wait --- if she was so beautiful, how come Sesshoumaru-sama had never said anything? Sure, he had given her funny looks every now and then, but they were usually over before she had time to evaluate them. And there was never anything in his gaze like that outright longing she had accidentally witnessed between the hanyou and Kagome. Rin groaned and smacked her forehead. "Atashi wa baka da!" she hissed vehemently. It had been so long and still HIS reactions were the first things that leapt to her mind! She was such a fool --- Sesshoumaru-sama didn't care for her at all! She forced herself to remember the rage in his fierce red eyes when he'd held her pinned to the ground.  
  
It didn't help.  
  
Without thinking, she brought her hand up to her scars, recalling the feel of his fangs and warm breath trailing slowly along her throat. She felt an unfamiliar tremor in her belly and knew instinctively that this strange new reaction wasn't purely due to fear. Rin tossed her head suddenly, as if hoping the dizzying motion would help rearrange her memories.  
  
In a small fit of temper, the young woman threw her polishing rag into the glowing coals, and uttered an angry curse that she had heard the hanyou use on more than one occasion. She didn't need these thoughts. She cast a quick glance over to the already snoring Totosai, and yawned.  
  
It looked like she could use some sleep as well, preferably the dreamless kind.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin awoke hours later with a deep sense of foreboding. Something was wrong. Totosai usually worked late into the night, seized by fits of energy and flashes of inspiration at the most ungodly hours. She had actually become accustomed to sleeping through his racket ---  
  
But now there was nothing but unnerving silence.  
  
She rose from bed, tip-toed down the shadowy hall, and crept stealthily into the foundry. The flames were still rumbling --- but Totosai was not tending to them. She found him towards the mouth of the cavern, standing very still, and peering owlishly up into the night sky.  
  
"Ojii-sama?" she whispered, pausing to gather her long nightgown out of the dust and soot. The strange old youkai didn't answer, but motioned that she stay back with a choppy wave of his hand. He continued to stare pointedly into the distance.  
  
Rin followed Totosai's fixed gaze in curiosity until she picked up a strange kind of shooting star. It was low, moving purposefully, and growing larger by the second as it headed straight for them. "What is that?" she breathed. The glowing ball actually seemed quite pretty and benign, but after years spent in the company of demons, she knew things were seldom as they appeared. Not for the first time, she found herself envying and wishing for the enhanced senses of a youkai.  
  
Totosai sniffed at the air, gasped with sudden fright, and then whirled on her in a flash. "RUN!" he shouted.  
  
He raced back to the forge and began to stoke the fire madly, looking back and forth between the curling billows of smoke and the steadily approaching ball of light. "I can't believe this," he muttered repeatedly, reaching to throw whatever was closest at hand into the greedy flames. He leapt up, slammed the flue closed, and began to stuff whatever left-over scraps of cloth he could find into the chimney to further block any gaps. The entire cavern was filled with noxious, burning ash in a matter of seconds. Rin had never seen him do anything so irrational or panicked.  
  
"What?!! What's happening?" she coughed out shrilly, fear starting to overtake her. Her eyes burned and she was forced to breathe through the fabric of her sleeve.  
  
"What the HELL are you still doing here?" Totosai screeched, "I told you to RUN!" When she only shook her head and looked at him with numb confusion, he knocked her down to the dust-covered floor behind an old cauldron. "Ahhh – no time!" he gritted.  
  
"Jii-sama? WHAT IS THAT?" she yelled in desperation, struggling to get back to her feet, and shielding her stinging eyes from the blinding white light that seemed to fill the whole sky now.  
  
Totosai fixed her with a grim look. "I think I might have made a mistake bringing you here, girl!" he whispered, staring hard into her pale face. "That's --- that's Sesshoumaru ---"  
  
Totosai didn't have to worry about Rin remaining hidden anymore--- at those words she felt as though all her blood were frozen. She collapsed back into the dirt, completely paralyzed with horror. Sesshoumaru-sama was here? She didn't even want to begin to imagine why. Had he made the connection between her and the Tenseiga already? Was this to be her end, filthy and cringing on the floor of a cave? And how had he come by the knowledge of her present whereabouts anyway?! She stifled a quick groan at bloody images of Inuyasha and Kagome dying or already dead. Despite her slight dislike for her lord's half-brother, she had never wished him any real HARM or PAIN ---  
  
Two things, she realized suddenly, that her former master would have NO trouble delivering to the hanyou.  
  
She pressed her hand over her mouth tightly, as the strange, eerie glow suddenly died. Surely, the great taiyoukai would not need to kill her --- the intense waves of guilt, anguish and fear coursing through her body were bound to stop her heart before he could even draw his sword. Rin trembled at the unmistakable sound of even steps picking through the gravel --- coming steadily closer.  
  
An ominous shadow suddenly darkened the whole entranceway to the cave. Her hand flew out to grip Totosai's wrist and she opened her mouth to speak but no words would come.  
  
"It's okay!" Totosai whispered in warning, shaking a finger at her trembling lips. "Don't you move now, and not ONE sound!" Wrenching his hand out of Rin's surprisingly tight grasp, he stepped in front of her and looked angrily upon the approaching intruder.  
  
"Hello again, Totosai ---"  
  
Rin's breath fluttered weakly in the shadows. That voice --- so deep, so hypnotic, so cold --- she'd recognize it till the end of time.  
  
Sesshoumaru entered the cavern imperiously and shook his head, trying not to show any sort of undignified reaction to condition of this forge. The flames in the oversized hearth raged loud and uncontrolled. Their furious roar drowned out any other sound and filled his pointed ears with a harsh, irritating buzz. He wanted to sneeze, to rub his eyes, or even gasp for good clean air, but continued to maintain his outwardly unaffected posture. A multitude of nauseating odors were playing havoc with his delicate sense of smell --- ash, smoke, mineral steam, and the cinders of demon bones and melted metal.  
  
Yet through it all, he thought he felt vague traces of something sweet --- something feminine? He looked down dubiously upon the old demon moving to confront him and tried to erase a particularly disturbing mental image from his mind. This ancient walking carcass was keeping some woman here? He wrinkled his nose and sniffed again. And a young woman at that. Revolting.  
  
Despite her terror at the situation, Rin couldn't resist this opportunity, and quietly resolved to steal a quick glance at the demon who'd cared for her for so long. She had not seen her lord since that heart-breaking day in the forest. Though little more than two months had passed, it felt like a lifetime.  
  
She opened her eyes and gazed upon him, her heart contracting bitterly at the sight.  
  
His long knee length hair was bound and loosely gathered in a high ponytail, and he had traded his flowing white robes for ones of deepest black. Tenseiga and Toukijin were now looped through a simple wine-colored obi that perfectly complemented the crimson stripes on his cheeks. He was as imposing and ethereal as ever, especially wreathed in misty smoke with nothing but the moon and firelight to illuminate him. Regal, haughty --- simply beautiful.  
  
His face was different though, grimmer than she remembered, and there was a deep sadness in his eyes that she was sure she had never beheld before. Rin tried to take a second glance, but he suddenly moved out of her narrow field of vision. She muffled a soft, involuntary cry of dismay in her hands.  
  
"My, my," commented Totosai, effectively ending the tense silence. "That look takes me back about four hundred years --- you so resemble your father!" Apparently, even the old demon couldn't help but notice the striking change in the taiyoukai's appearance as well. "Yep, just like Inutaisho," he continued, offering fond smile of remembrance. "Well, except for that ---" He waved his wrinkly hand absently towards the emblem of the crescent moon.  
  
Sesshoumaru cast off the attempt at conversation with a dismissive nod. "I did not come to this filthy hole to reminisce about the past," he intoned blandly, gazing down to inspect his sharp claws. His eyes clearly warned that he was looking for ANY reason to put them to good use. "Keep your observations to yourself, old man."  
  
Totosai frowned. "Well, you may look like your father but you certainly don't have a tenth of his honor!" he shouted in a huff. "Or his wisdom!" he added sourly under his breath.  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes --- what was that?! This lunatic still dared to insult and defy him? "Wisdom?!" he grated. "I do not know on what grounds you seek to lecture me on wisdom ---- this from a smith who apparently cannot even manage his own fire! How you garnered such a high reputation is beyond me, fool."  
  
He shook his head again and tried not to cough. He'd better hurry with his task before the suffocating smoke or this vexing old demon drove him mad. Sesshoumaru strode deeper into the cavern, brushing arrogantly past the startled Totosai. His golden eyes roamed over the recently completed weapons and armor hanging on display.  
  
"Hey, hey!!" Totosai yelled, bristling at the indignity of being ignored and disrespected in his own home. "So, to what do I owe the honor of this little visit? Just what the hell do you want?" Maybe the arrogant boy didn't know Rin was here ---  
  
Sesshoumaru continued to ignore him, moving instead to inspect a rather intimidating looking o-yorai that caught his fancy. Despite his words to the contrary, he could see in an instant why Chichiue had chosen this crazy old smith. He lifted the armor down effortlessly to admire its fine craftsmanship up-close. This piece was more than he could have hoped for: wicked, powerful, and simply radiating with the energy of whatever formidable oni had donated its scales. It was deadly, yet beautifully elegant at the same time. He ran his claws lightly over the delicate designs carved into the spikes of the sode and chest-plate. Strange – Totosai's work had always been rather plain, absent of artistic embellishments such as these. When had he changed his style and technique? And where had he seen these patterns before?  
  
He decided to favor Totosai with a short explanation for his presence as he continued to trace the lines of the intricate etchings in fascination. "Much to my surprise, a lowly excuse for a half-demon managed to break my kikou." he supplied curtly. "I have come to acquire a more suitable replacement. This one here will do nicely."  
  
The sword-smith blinked in outrage as Sesshoumaru suddenly reached out to begin unfastening the buckles and re-lacing the bindings. With practiced hands, the proud demon pulled the armor to fit snugly around his chest.  
  
"Wait a minute! Get your damn paws off that you --- you --- dog!" Totosai shrieked.  
  
The taiyoukai growled. "Hold your tongue, old man! I am no thief! Consider this as suitable repayment for my ALLOWING you to live after your interference with that whelp, Inuyasha!"  
  
At Sesshoumaru's heated declaration, Totosai ceased all protests with a gulp, while Rin, still concealed in the murky shadows, simultaneously buried her face in her hands. Oh gods! He knew?! He was just toying with them!? Sesshoumaru-sama HAD found out about her!? She was as good as dead -- -  
  
Totosai paled. "Interference with I-Inu-Inuyasha???" he asked. "H-How?!? Ahhh --- when?! I-I don't know what you're talking about!" His eyes darted unconsciously to Rin's hiding place.  
  
"Gods - it seems that time has done NOTHING to improve your mind," the younger demon snapped, unable to mask his contempt. "Or your grasp on reality! Did you think this Sesshoumaru would forget?" He finished adjusting the new armor around his torso, and scoffed at the other youkai's semi-vacant expression. "You pitiful wretch, shall I refresh your memory?! I speak of your meddling with the Tetsusaiga when you helped that lowly mongrel master the Kaze no Kizu!"  
  
Totosai exhaled sharply. "Ohhhhh! Right, right, right! Of course you're talking about THAT! My interference with Inuyasha WAY, WAY back then! H- Haven't had anything to do with him these days! Ha, ha!" the old youkai tittered nervously.  
  
Sesshoumaru's slitted eyes narrowed. Totosai had started to sweat, and it wasn't from the heat of the fire.  
  
There was FEAR in the old demon's face. Something more was happening here -- -  
  
The stench of twisted, melting metal was still setting his mind into a frenzy. Sniffing out a lie, or just whatever it was that this crazy old creature was trying so desperately to hide, was utterly futile at the moment. The intense roar of the flames continued to overload his other senses as well, but he chose to ignore the ache. He began to concentrate on listening to the old youkai's thundering heart. It was pounding WAY too fast and was followed by --- another?!  
  
Someone else was in this very room. He swore he could detect a second VERY erratic beat, though the sound was faint and slightly muffled. Sesshoumaru took a threatening step forward --- there were other ways to flush out unseen traps or deceptions. He flexed his fingers and extended his claws.  
  
Totosai set his jaw defiantly. "That's far enough, boy," he warned, reaching for his tools and brandishing a long mallet, "If armor is what you wanted, then you got what you came here for! Now go, you ungrateful puppy!"  
  
The taiyoukai flashed a brilliant, wicked smile and paced forward again, daring the weaker demon to try to stop his advance. Rin was forced to stifle a squeak as his boots stopped almost directly in front of her hiding place. She was torn with the simultaneous desire to burst forth from the shadows and beg for forgiveness, and the equally desperate urge to flee. She quickly realized that proceeding with either of those actions would most definitely get her killed, and flattened her shaking form lower to the floor instead!  
  
Despite his immediate peril, Totosai would not back down. "Don't make me have to teach you a lesson!" he shouted angrily at the taiyoukai. "Get out now, Wan-chan, or so help me, I'll deliver the beating your father should have given you when you were small!"  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes widened marginally and he gave a harsh laugh. Rin shivered at the deadly sound echoing above her --- that short, mocking noise seemed even more frigid than the snow outside.  
  
Wan-chan? No one had ever dared call him that --- not even when he was one! His laughter ceased abruptly. "Take care with your words, you decrepit half- wit," he sneered. "You SHOULD really be grateful! This Sesshoumaru could very easily take your life, instead of just a mere piece of armor!"  
  
Totosai shrank back nervously as the dog demon's eyes shifted to red and his youki began to build. He shook the mallet in anticipation and prepared himself for the inevitable attack.  
  
After a tense moment, however, Sesshoumaru merely smiled again and began to back slowly from the cavern. Let this senile old fool keep his secrets and his mysterious hidden companion. What did it matter to him anyway? He had more pressing things to deal with now.  
  
"You'll be leaving then?!" the old youkai asked, voice filled with equal parts of relief and surprise.  
  
"Most assuredly," Sesshoumaru confirmed. "After all, I have no desire to stain MY new kikou with the blood of an enfeebled old man --- I have slightly more important creatures to kill." He strode out into the night, casting one last look of scorn over his shoulder.  
  
Totosai waited until he felt all traces of the taiyoukai's power disappear, then fell in a state of nervous collapse next to Rin. Neither of them spoke for the space of several long breaths.  
  
Finally, Totosai broke the edgy silence and burst out, "Well, that just took about five hundred years off my life!" The girl said nothing in reply, but rose steadily to her feet. She took a few small steps forward until she came to be on the very same spot that Sesshoumaru had stood mere moments before.  
  
Rin gripped her robe more tightly around her trembling frame. At the present moment, she couldn't tell if her shivering was in response the deep chill in the air or to her gradually waning fear.  
  
She left the cavern and treaded daintily into the light snow, pausing to compare Sesshoumaru's large footprints to her own tiny ones. The young woman slowly followed the few tracks until they simply disappeared off the cliff. She stared out into the night sky and could find no sign of his presence at all.  
  
Like always, she realized, Sesshoumaru-sama had simply TAKEN what he wanted, without stopping to ponder about the after-effects of his actions. She thought of him streaking away into the distance without an emotion in his empty heart. He would never know or care that she had just crouched in the dirt, concealed beneath his very gaze. He would never know that at this very moment he was wearing the o-yorai she had so painstakingly helped to craft.  
  
She bowed her head and hugged her own shoulders in a tight grip.  
  
But strangely, even despite the bitter irony of the situation, she couldn't bring herself to cry anymore.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	10. Chapter 9

Chapter 9: Wagamama  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Totosai stared down the mountainside with a worried frown. Rin was late in returning AGAIN. He paced the entire length of the ledge in nervous anticipation and glanced up at the grey sky. Dark, heavy clouds were gathering on the horizon --- a clear sign of an impending snow-storm. If the young woman didn't return within the hour, she would most likely be cut- off, possibly for days!  
  
Totosai inhaled deeply, trying to catch any trace of her scent on the raging wind. Ever since that surprise encounter with her former master last week, the smith had noticed a marked change in the girl's behavior. Though a bitter sadness still remained in her eyes, most of her outward depression had faded to give rise to a fierce sort of recklessness. It was almost as if something in her heart had burned away and she had no more fear.  
  
Though the girl had never been one to sit idle for more than a few minutes at a time, she had --- up until now, at least --- always been content to remain close to the cave and under his watchful eye.  
  
But that was all before Sesshoumaru's unexpected visit.  
  
Now Rin was prone to wander, disappearing down into the valley for long stretches of time with hardly a word as to when she'd return. Lately, she had even begun to cajole Momo for rides to cover more ground while exploring the steep mountain trails. Totosai sighed. Obviously, she must have taken him with her again this evening --- the fat bull was nowhere to be found and wouldn't answer to any of his repeated calls.  
  
The old demon kicked at the snow in frustration. With his one means of transportation also currently missing, there was NO way for him to initiate a proper search or attempt a rescue. He could only hope his wayward girl was safe and knew exactly what she was doing --- wherever the hell she was.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin hovered low on Momo's broad back, shielding her eyes from the stinging hail and wind. There was NO way she could make it home tonight. The craggy pass was blocked by thick storm clouds and the fog was so dense she could hardly see her own hand in front of her face. Though fairly confident that her strange mount could scent his way back to the forge, she simply wouldn't risk the chance of getting lost in a blizzard. With small taps of her heels, she guided the bull back down from the frigid air.  
  
They silently glided into the sheltered, clear valley below. After a few quick moments of circling, Rin finally spotted a suitable place to make camp next to the large lake.  
  
Totosai would doubtlessly fret over her absence. The young woman felt horrible to cause the caring old demon needless worry, but she had to get out of the treacherous weather and warm up. Besides, she secretly delighted in this unexpected chance to be on her own in the woods again. It had been SO long since she had lain out under the stars, felt the dry grass beneath her feet, or smelled the crisp scent of the forest in late-autumn. Momo seemed just as happy with this unforeseen change of plans as well, and settled into grazing just as quickly as she had hopped from his back.  
  
Rin smiled thankfully at the odd-looking beast, as he tore voraciously at a clump weeds. As usual, his three beady eyes were blinking slightly out of sync, and he offered her a contented low when he noticed her gaze upon him. The bull swished his tale happily, and quickly returned to ignoring her in favor of continuing his grazing. Rin snorted. Though she was very grateful for the Momo's companionship, he just wasn't the same as Aun!  
  
Rin still missed the two-headed youkai immensely. She sighed at his memory, recalling the dragon's more adventurous nature and bravery. She remembered how he had warmed to her presence right away to become her most faithful companion and dedicated protector. She looked back at Momo with a sly grin, and shook her head. It had taken considerably longer for him to trust and accept her. Rin had initially found the youkai bull to be cantankerous, spiteful and obstinately loyal to only one master. But she had won him over in the end --- though it had taken a great deal of patient wheedling, tons of little treats, and long hours spent scratching around his horns and poll. She was really lucky, she suddenly realized. What other human girl could count such wonderful creatures as pets at one time or another? Rin stopped the direction of her thoughts with a look of deep disgust. Pets? Who was she to talk? After all, she had been nothing more than a pet as well. Naraku had certainly been right about that one point.  
  
Little by little, Rin meandered down to the water's edge. Every day she could look upon this lake from her home high above on the mountain's peak. Until now, however, she had never surveyed it up close before. The young woman traveled slowly around the dark shore, trailing her fingers through the tall reeds. The night air was cool, but pleasantly so, and a pretty mist drifted up along the bank. A strong breeze would occasionally gust to set the fallen leaves swirling and cause bright ripples on the shadowy water. Somewhere in the distance, she could here an owl calling mournfully for its mate. For a moment, it seemed like the whole world was calm and at peace.  
  
Rin sighed and looked up at what few stars she could see peeking through the clouds. She suddenly thought back to the night Sesshoumaru-sama had come to the forge and her cheeks heated with a deep sense of disappointment in herself for cringing and cowering. What had happened to her? When had she become so meek and diffident? She could remember a time when she feared nothing --- not even death!  
  
She was so damn tired of being considered a useless burden. It seemed that all her life she had been unwanted! After the murders of her real parents and oniisan, the peasants in her childhood village had provided for her basic needs, but only out of moral obligation. They offered no kindness or love, and had brutally rebuffed every one of her timid advances for security and companionship. Rin vividly remembered the name-calling, the stone throwing, and, of course, the vicious beatings.  
  
She thought Sesshoumaru-sama had saved her from all of that! For a time, she had truly believed she had found a real home and a real family --- no matter how odd that family might have seemed to outsiders.  
  
But the cruel statements her master had uttered the night he sent her away had shaken her to the very core. She was no fool and never had any doubt that he had originally revived her only out of simple curiosity. She knew that the act of saving her was more of an exercise to stroke his own mighty ego and prove he had some mastery over his blade, rather than a show of compassion and caring. She had HOPED, however, that time might have changed his initial low opinion of her. Could it be that he really didn't care whether she lived or died now? Had it really been such a bothersome undertaking for him to endure a human's presence?  
  
Rin's fists clenched tightly. "I'm NOT nothing!!!!" she suddenly shouted up at the sky. She ducked her head sheepishly as her words were carried off by the wind, surprised at her own sudden outburst. She was really rather grateful that no one was around to witness her strange behavior --- well, no one except for Momo, of course. She rolled her eyes and smirked back at the sight of the placid bull spinning in slow circles in search of the perfect spot to bed down. Quietly, she climbed back up the small bank.  
  
Too tired to start a fire, she settled instead for snuggling against the massive youkai's shoulder for warmth. She curled her toes under the length of her thick green winter robe, and wished very much that she had remembered to bring an extra blanket. It was certainly going to be a long, cold night.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Totosai was out on the ledge again at the crack of dawn. In truth, he'd never really completely left, only disappearing back into the forge whenever he'd needed to warm up or grab a sip of hot tea. The storm had abated slightly and he waited impatiently for the errant girl to make her appearance. A sudden shadow passed over head from the opposite direction than he had been expecting, startling the old smith from his renewed pacing. He looked up just in time to see Momo make a rather ungainly landing. Rin hopped from the bull's sleek back, stopping to give the creature a grateful slap on his pudgy flank. Totosai drummed his foot in annoyance and threw her a chastising look. "Hey, girl!" he rebuked, "just where the hell have you been? I've been worried sick!"  
  
"Sorry, Ojii-sama – the pass was full of snow, and I had to make camp for the night!" she explained hurriedly. Rin gave the old man a fond hug and flashed a cloying grin.  
  
"Cut that out! Don't you give me that look, missy!" Totosai scolded, following at her heels as she moved into the warmth of the cavern. "It's not fair and it's NOT going to work this time! I didn't know if anything had happened to you! Don't tell me you've forgotten about our 'little incident' already?"  
  
"Of course, I haven't forgotten, Ojii-sama! How could I?" she countered. A quick image of Sesshoumaru standing in this very place flashed instantly into her mind. "It's just that ---"  
  
"Just nothing!" Totosai interrupted, punching his fist into his hand for emphasis. "We were lucky, young lady, and the only thing you can ever count on with luck is that ALWAYS runs out! What if HE comes back?  
  
"He won't be back," the girl whispered flatly. She shook the clinging snow from her hair and marched into the arsenal hall, hoping to make it to her room quickly. She desperately wanted to warm up in her own bed and put a swift end to this little lecture on her recent behavior. "Sesshoumaru-sama has everything he wants, and 'more important pursuits to follow'," she quoted. She stared at her feet and sighed. "He will not return here."  
  
"Well --- that's not the point!" Totosai yelled, finally losing his patience. "Sesshoumaru's NOT the only demon out there, you know! Look at you --- you're unarmed, unprotected, and unprepared! You're just running around completely defenseless in the wild! You're practically begging to get killed!!!"  
  
Rin shook with anger and humiliation. Deep inside she knew that Totosai genuinely cared for her and meant no disrespect, but she was thoroughly tired of people thinking she was weak and nothing more then a hindrance!  
  
"Unprotected, huh?" she shouted back. Her eyes scanned through the rows of weapons gleaming on the walls, each one bursting with tremendous jyaki. Every weapon here was far too powerful for a human to even consider touching ---  
  
Every weapon, save one. Rin's eyes came to focus automatically on a fine naginata leaning forgotten in the corner.  
  
Sometime last month, a rather weak, but exceedingly haughty, itachi demon had arrived at the foundry to commission this particular weapon for his daughter. The insipid, spoiled youkai girl had proven to be even weaker than her sire, and Rin's cheeks still burned at the memory of her pretentious manner.  
  
The over-bearing, orange-eyed brat had refused to accept the elegant pike as soon she found out that a human had a hand in its design. Adding insult to injury, she had cast out several biting slurs about Totosai's competency and skill level, scoffing that the blade was too weak when she proved unable to wield it properly. The snobbish pair had then stomped out of the forge with loud declarations of disgust and jeering catcalls praising Totosai's dead apprentice, the evil smith Kaijinbo.  
  
Rin clenched her jaw in anger. That stupid weasel-girl had no one to blame but herself --- the jyaki in her fangs was SO pathetic it simply didn't contain the additional strength needed to power a blade!  
  
But maybe, just maybe, that might work to HER advantage now --- out of all the weapons here, this one ALONE might accept handling by a human. She paused and let her glance linger critically on the light spear. Gods- she had to move quickly before she either lost her nerve or Totosai recognized her full intentions. With a determined expression, she raced across the room and reached out hastily to seize the naginata's shaft in both fists. Totosai turned at her sudden burst of movement and cried out in alarm when he realized what she'd done.  
  
The second Rin's hands closed around the pike, she realized she might have made a BIG mistake. Jyaki was still jyaki, no matter how weak or insignificant the amount! She felt a most unpleasant tingle spreading outward from her fingertips and a crackle of sickly green light built around her wrists. Like wild-fire, the sensations and jolting energy shot up her arms and into her spine. The power continued to grow in intensity until it became a scathing burn which exploded throughout her entire form.  
  
The naginata rattled in her grasp, dragging her around the narrow corridor as it tried to reject her hold. Rin winced as she crashed into the wall and Totosai was forced to leap back to avoid being impaled on the wildly spinning blade. But, through it all, Rin gritted her teeth and stubbornly refused to let go. That night on the battlefield with Naraku she HAD endured the torture of grasping Tenseiga! Never mind that it had only been for a few seconds and that her hands had been somewhat protected by the fabric of her sleeves! The ache from THIS measly spear was nothing compared to the pain of clutching a TRUE demon sword! Surely the strength of her will would prove greater than the pitiful amount of jyaki that went into this weapon!?!  
  
Long minutes passed, and, inevitably, Rin found herself slowly forced to her bruised knees, inch by agonizing inch. The sweat beaded on her brow and she hung her head in near defeat. It wasn't fair that SHE was human! Why should someone as useless as that arrogant little demoness automatically be afforded respect?! Why did simply being a youkai make her better?! What tragedies had she overcome? What enemies had she ever faced and what loyalty had she ever shown!? Rin continued to concentrate all of her anger on that simpering, ungrateful itachi girl! One day, Sesshoumaru-sama would doubtlessly take a high-born creature such as THAT for his mate. Some self- glorifying, useless youkai woman would earn a place in his life, not through her actions but because of her status and race! Rin cried out from the pain raging within her body and heart. She collapsed brokenly to the floor, but still continued to obstinately try and fight on.  
  
When the girl fell in a near-exhausted heap, Totosai was finally able to safely reach her side. The old demon slapped wildly at her hands, trying to pry her determined fingers from the shaft of the spear. Rin pushed him back weakly and still refused to relinquish her grip. She felt a serene, drowsy peace begin to wash over her. Maybe, she thought numbly, maybe it would all go away if she just went to sleep. As unconsciousness began to claim her, Rin reached deep within herself one last time in search of any hidden reserve of strength ---  
  
And suddenly touched something of great power.  
  
She straightened immediately, feeling an intense foreign energy flood into her limbs to push back the malicious jyaki in the blade. The weapon instantaneously stopped struggling against her attempt to claim it. Over the next few seconds, most of the pain she had been suffering began to fade.  
  
The sounds and smells of the cavern were all abnormally muffled and muted -- - almost as if her head had been plunged under water. Bit by bit, though, the world returned into focus. Rin slowly came back to herself to find Totosai yelling in panic and shaking her shoulders. She groaned and rolled to her side, fighting the furious urge to be violently sick. "What have you done, girl?" the old youkai screeched.  
  
Rin struggled to control her shallow breathing and turned back to face him. "You - you said I shouldn't be u-unprotected a-and I knew this was the only weapon here I had ANY chance of w-wielding!" she raggedly whispered, turning the pike in her hands with a look of wonder. Though still a bit shaky and weak, Rin continued defensively, "I'm not h-helpless!" Despite the last few lingering aches, the girl finally found the strength to manage a small, triumphant smile. "D-didn't you see what I just did, Ojii-sama?" she asked proudly, running her hand along the now dormant youkai weapon.  
  
"Yeah – I saw what you did!" Totosai shrieked, "The real question should be --- do YOU KNOW what YOU just DID?!?  
  
Rin's overconfident smile disappeared quickly and she slowly shook her head in denial. Totosai bellowed a curse and stomped his foot. "Girl, don't you remember what I told you about the power keeping you alive!?" he roared. "Remember what I said about that piece of Sesshoumaru's youki? Well, you just found it!"  
  
"Nani?"  
  
Totosai ignored both her shocked look and her tiny, bewildered question. "We've already had one close call!' he rambled on, "There's NO way the boy didn't feel that!" He turned to cast a panicked look over his shoulder as if half expecting the taiyoukai to be at his threshold already.  
  
"Feel?" Rin whispered. Her dawning comprehension had caused her already drained face to become paler still. "You mean Sesshoumaru-sama could feel -- -"  
  
"YES – don't you get it?" Totosai interrupted, "What you just touched was the little wisp of his youki --- the piece of himself he can take BACK from you if he so chooses!"  
  
"I'm so sorry --- I had no idea!" Rin wailed. "You said I didn't have any power! How come I haven't felt anything like this before!?"  
  
"Because you were practically dying just now, little girl!" Totosai explained in a slightly softer tone. He poked a bony finger at the naginata. "This thing here was killing you!"  
  
Rin's brown eyes widened in a sudden flash of understanding. "Ojiisama- I'm sorry," she repeated in an exhausted voice. "I'm just so tired of feeling like this! I'm tired of being looked at as nothing more than a burden!"  
  
"Burden?" Totosai whispered vehemently, catching her up in a fierce hug. "Never, girl --- you've never been a burden. I don't think you could be, even if you tried to --- you're way too small, you know!" He offered a lopsided, pointy-toothed grin.  
  
Rin blinked rapidly, than shook her head at Totosai's silly attempt to lighten the mood. She tried to suppress a smile, but found she simply couldn't. "You've been so kind to me and I didn't mean to worry you, Ojii- sama." she said quietly.  
  
"That's okay --- someone's gotta keep me on my toes!" the sword-smith laughed. He gestured again at the weapon in her hands, "You know you don't need to hold that so tightly now!"  
  
Rin's mouth formed a grim line, and she looked down rather doubtfully. She didn't want a repeat of THAT ordeal every time she wanted to use the spear! Totosai sensed what was causing her apprehension and smiled wryly. "It's alright, girl, you'll never have to go through that again! Any weapon with jyaki has to accept its owner, and this one appears to have finally chosen you. I'm kinda glad actually --- at least I won't have to watch it collect dust in the corner." He gave her a gentle pat on the back and helped pull her to her feet, "And, at least I won't have to worry about you being defenseless so much anymore either, huh?!"  
  
The girl smiled gratefully, and nodded, feeling an immense, unfamiliar sense of accomplishment. She wearily excused herself with another muttered apology to her new master. Totosai nodded in understanding, twirling his scraggly beard in his fingertips. He could tell the girl had something VERY important on her mind. She seemed to want to be alone, however, and for the moment, the old smith decided not to pry.  
  
Rin hurried quickly to her bedchamber, still a bit in awe of the weapon in her hands. But something else was even MORE intriguing. She couldn't help but marvel about the power she'd very briefly connected with. THAT was really Sesshoumaru's youki? Impossible.  
  
She would have thought HIS power would have seemed menacing and cruel. But the sensation she had just encountered had been anything but!  
  
Admittedly, whatever she'd touched had been impossibly strong --- but it was also warm, encouraging and protective. It was surprised; but, at the same time, also inviting, open and tender.  
  
She threw herself into her soft, comfortable bed and stared up at the smooth rock of the ceiling in confusion. Rin closed her eyes with a sigh and began to drift off.  
  
Warm and tender? No, she thought sleepily, that couldn't be Sesshoumaru at all.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sesshoumaru glided swiftly through the dense southern forest. It would seem that resuming his travels had NOT improved his life or his irritable state of mind in the slightest. In fact, he realized angrily, nowadays things were steadily becoming worse ---  
  
First of all, it had taken nearly a week to remove the horrid stench of the forge from his skin, hair and clothing. The taiyoukai still bristled at thoughts of Totosai and how the crazy old demon had successfully managed to dull his senses under a pitiful screen of smoke and ash. Damn, he absolutely HATED feeling exploited and powerless! So far, nearly every spare hour in his journey had been spent soaking in numerous small springs and creeks along the trail --- clothes, armor and all!  
  
Even now, he shuddered at the memory of that choking smell! Strangely enough though, days later, he'd discovered that another heady scent also clung faintly to him --- actually, more specifically to the carved designs on his recently acquired o-yorai. This particular odor was NOT so unpleasant. In fact, it rather greatly reminded him of the gentle fragrance of his former ward. It was positively ludicrous. He'd merely cast it off as further evidence that he needed to get on with his life, and simply decided to scrub at the elegant new armor till no trace remained.  
  
Secondly, despite all his methodical and thorough hunting, the search for Naraku was proving fruitless and yielding no leads whatsoever. He could find simply no sign of the scheming half-demon anywhere! It was beyond frustrating that a creature with so much evil jyaki could just cleanly vanish at will. For the briefest moment, he had even debated seeking out the weakling hanyou to see if he'd heard any word or noticed any clues. He had very quickly come back to his senses and decided that he just wasn't up for THAT level of aggravation at the current moment.  
  
And FINALLY --- and most disturbingly perhaps --- there was that unsettling little incident yesterday morning. It had been early dawn, and he was reclining against the trunk of a tree, comfortably lost somewhere between sleep and wakefulness. Quite surprisingly, there had been the strangely real feeling of small, cool hands trailing gently along his cheeks and throat, edging lower to caress his chest with teasing softness. At first, he'd simply thought he was about to enjoy a rather pleasurable dream, when suddenly the soothing sensations had abruptly changed into something --- SOMETHING ELSE. It had felt as though burning fingers were reaching to plunge and twist deep within his belly, and there was an insistent tug at his power. Sesshoumaru grimaced, thinking back to how he'd come fully awake at that moment with a harsh cry of surprise, drenched in sweat and gasping deeply for breath.  
  
Just what the HELL was that anyway? The only times he'd ever felt something remotely similar were the two occasions when Naraku had sought to absorb his youki. But though THIS pull had seemed just as urgent and demanding, this time he had the distinct impression that there was no real malice behind the act. The power that touched him had felt familiar somehow, almost --- almost like his own?! The stoic taiyoukai thoroughly detested being this confused and out of control. Could he actually be under some kind of spell? Impossible, he scoffed.  
  
Sesshoumaru paused momentarily and meticulously adjusted the two swords at his hip. His one comfort was that he'd reach his intended destination today. He needed to find answers quickly and, thankfully, knew of at least one dignified and reliable source for information. He would seek out Bokuseno --- the only creature whose counsel he had come to trust since Chichiue's death. The ancient tree demon heard everything and knew all that was going on in his forests faster than the wind could rattle through his leaves. Surely, he'd have some information on Naraku, at the very least!  
  
The taiyoukai continued on, weaving steadily through the tall, stately trees. The filtered sunlight cast eerie shadows on the mossy forest floor, and the crisp autumn air suddenly seemed rather stagnant and stuffy. He entered a hidden glade and stopped before an impressive, gnarled old magnolia tree. Sesshoumaru waited patiently as the bark twisted and groaned to contort into a wizened old face.  
  
"Bokuseno ---" He offered a quick, courteous nod in greeting.  
  
"Well, what have we here?" called out a slow, booming voice in return. "The son of the great dog demon? I have not seen you in ages. You have changed of late --- you look much like your father."  
  
Sesshoumaru frowned, but Bokuseno continued on before he could react to the comment.  
  
"And where is the little one?" the tree inquired pleasantly. His dark eyes darted around the clearing in search of Rin. "Where is that sweet girl that always sought to reach my petals?"  
  
Bokuseno chuckled deeply, causing the ground to vibrate somewhat. "Why, I remember the time she climbed so high, and you sent that grumbling toad up into my boughs to retrieve her. I had not been that amused for over a hundred years!"  
  
Sesshoumaru's brows lowered in resentment and his frown deepened into a scowl. Just when he believed he had the girl out of his thoughts, someone had to go and remind him. Did Rin somehow manage to force her way into the hearts and fond memories of every demon she ever encountered? Apparently so, he sneered to himself, as he took note of Bokuseno's expectant and anxious expression.  
  
"Rin is a child no longer, but a woman grown. This Sesshoumaru has finally returned her to be among her OWN kind," he replied, forcing as much disdain as possible into his voice. He fervently hoped that the sage old youkai would pick up on his annoyance and settle on a more suitable topic of discussion. If anything, however, the ancient being appeared to be even MORE interested in the girl's fate now.  
  
"Oh?" Bokuseno asked unhurriedly, clearly very perplexed. "And just WHAT kind is that?"  
  
Nani? The taiyoukai blinked in confusion. It seemed perhaps that age might have caught up with Bokuseno at last. Had his once great mind now become as empty and feeble as Totosai's? Had he forgotten the simple and obvious fact that Rin was human? Sesshoumaru automatically shifted back a step, as if afraid this madness and memory loss were a plague.  
  
"Wait!" thundered Bokuseno. "Do not go! Tell me, you did not really send HER back to a ningen village?"  
  
"Of course, I did!" he snapped irritably in return. "Where else would she belong? She was human herself!"  
  
Sesshoumaru thought the pointless matter was fully resolved and looked down in blatant disappointment. His original intentions of asking about any rumors regarding Naraku's whereabouts were completely forgotten --- clearly Father's old friend had lost all his wits! The dog demon felt a small, uncharacteristic pang of guilt. Maybe he should have sought out this youkai's counsel more frequently over the years. Perhaps if the tree demon had experienced temporary companionship or been engaged in conversation a bit more regularly, his once broad intellect wouldn't have faded. Sesshoumaru sighed and turned to leave.  
  
"Wait – the girl wasn't human!" Bokuseno bellowed out at his retreating back. "Well, at least not entirely anymore! After all, what about your 'gift'?!" The venerable demon's rough face suddenly contorted in panic. "Wait - you did not take 'it' back by any chance?!"  
  
In spite of himself, Sesshoumaru turned and stalked back to the large tree, his interest clearly piqued. "Of what do you speak? What gift? Take 'what' back?!" he questioned rapidly through gritted teeth.  
  
Bokuseno's replies were just as vehement. "I speak of the girl's life, of course --- of the power you endowed to her with Tenseiga?! With her new youkai life-span, surely you could have found a suitable demon to be her mate, rather than some failing, anonymous human!"  
  
"Why, I even half thought you planned on taking her for yourself one day!" The tree's yellowing leaves shook with sudden mirth. "I had thought it was a bit peculiar at first, YOU taking in one so young, but I knew she would not stay small forever!"  
  
Sesshoumaru felt an uncomfortable chill run up his spine, the sensation eerily akin to that foreign feeling he'd experienced yesterday morning. What the hell was going on? What had he done to Rin?! Tenseiga had imparted some sort of power to her that made her --- made her no longer quite human?! He shook his head in confusion. "I-I do not understand," he stammered.  
  
Bokuseno looked on in shock. The taiyoukai's normally pale complexion had turned such a bloodless white that even the stripes on his high cheekbones appeared somewhat muted.  
  
"Er - well, surely you knew, my lord? You have possessed the Tenseiga for so long now, I believed you had mastered it and knew something of its history and powers," the tree stated haltingly. "Did you not know that your father had it forged out of his deep remorse for Sesseika-sama's death, and also to eternally keep his second mate, the human woman, Izayoi?"  
  
Despite his current state of shock, Sesshoumaru suddenly stiffened as if in immense pain. "You will never mention that whore and MY mother's name in the same sentence!!" he snarled, baring his fangs.  
  
Bokuseno frowned angrily at the taiyoukai's heated response, and his branches waved through the air in unmistakable threat. The old creature was not accustomed to being disrespected. His heavy brows knit together in ire, yet he continued on leisurely, as if he hadn't been so rudely interrupted at all.  
  
"Did you never wonder why your father bequeathed that sword to YOU in the first place?" he asked slowly.  
  
The young demon could only shake his head in numb denial.  
  
"Inutaisho truly felt that through his mistakes you were cheated of so much. In the end, he could hardly recognize what had become of his own first-born son. You were so distant, so hostile, so vengeful --- it wounded him more than you know. He firmly believed that he owed you the ability to heal your troubled heart and never suffer a loss such as that again."  
  
Sesshoumaru's breaths were coming in great heaving pants, but still Bokuseno would not stop.  
  
"Even if you were not aware of the Tenseiga's past or purposes, or your Father's lofty hopes, surely --- with your great power --- you could have sensed that little piece of yourself within the girl's soul?" the old demon asked intently.  
  
A little piece of himself in Rin's soul?  
  
That was the breaking point. With that one measured question, Sesshoumaru found he could no longer support himself upright. The demon lord's knees buckled and he slid inelegantly to the soft forest floor, momentarily too stunned to speak.  
  
He tried to think about his strange former companion --- tried to remember everything about her, and how he felt in her presence. Too many memories and unfamiliar feelings rushed through him at once, and he reflexively bristled with rage. Rin was connected to him?! That strange, invasive feeling from yesterday --- could that have been HER? He growled and staggered awkwardly back to his feet. This simply couldn't be possible!  
  
"No," he whispered dangerously, mostly to himself. His heart raced and his vision began to swim dizzily. "You are mistaken."  
  
Bokuseno instantly recognized the angry rise in energy and sought to calm the growing agitation building in the dog demon's youki. He didn't know what was more disturbing: the taiyoukai's wildly spiking power, or his cold, unfeeling look. He thought of the small, young girl --- wherever she might be now. He considered her safety and suddenly regretted being so harsh on this eldest son of his noble friend. "Wait, my lord," the wise old tree soothed, "Do not do anything rash."  
  
Sesshoumaru threw back his head and barked out a guttural laugh. "Tell me, old Bokuseno, if you dare," he hissed, "when has this Sesshoumaru EVER done anything rash?"  
  
"I mean no disrespect," the demon responded coolly. "I simply have no wish to see you do something you WILL come to regret, my lord."  
  
Bokuseno's beseeching pleas for the taiyoukai to remain calm seemed to have the opposite effect. All of Sesshoumaru's thoughts were lost in scattered turmoil and a shadow of bitterness filled his mind. What in the hell was going on? Had he fallen so far now that any demon could question his actions or motives? Even a demon as renowned and esteemed as Bokuseno had no right to rebuke him! When had he EVER miscalculated? When had he EVER done anything rash or something he'd regret? He looked down solemnly at Tenseiga and his golden eyes narrowed in pure fury --- at the moment, he only could think of ONE occasion.  
  
He whirled suddenly and raced from the tiny clearing, even as the tree demon continued to beg for him to stop. The resonating voice of Bokuseno echoed out and faded behind him, but Sesshoumaru would not heed those rumbling cries. He was completely lost in a dark, single-minded purpose.  
  
It looked like he would be honoring his pathetic half-brother with a little visit, after all. He needed to find Rin and confirm the truth with his own eyes  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Mini-Glossary –  
  
itachi: weasel (figured I'd make the spoiled, nasty girl mentioned in the chapter a weasel demon --- seemed fitting!)  
  
jyaki: a youkai's evil power (though I'm sure everyone's got this one down already!)  
  
naginata: a spear with a rather long point, usually just as wide as the shaft; was once kind of a women's traditional weapon  
  
nani: what?  
  
Ojii-sama: a respectful way of saying "grandpa"/old man  
  
Oniisan: older brother  
  
Oh, in the dream a few chapters back? When Sesshoumaru said "Omae no orokana ningen no kokoro" to Rin - Roughly: "Your foolish human heart."  
  
Chichiue – very respectful term for father (honored father)  
  
Ningen – human  
  
O-yorai – the style of armor of the time-period, I hope!  
  
Oh yeah – and I think SODE is the term for the shoulder piece and spikes! I've also seen it used for "sleeve" (Aren't library cards awesome?!)  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	11. Chapter 10

Chapter 10: Odoroki  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin's fingers clenched around her new weapon nervously as she rehearsed her carefully prepared speech one last time in her mind: 'Ojiisama, may I please borrow Momo for a longer journey? I think I'd like to go to the miko's village. I'm finally feeling ready to meet other people and, after all, Kagome-sama did invite me. I'll be alright; I won't get in any trouble.' It sounded like a perfectly reasonable request --- so why was she having so much trouble asking?  
  
She paced compulsively and peeked in on her master again. Totosai was hard at work at the fireside and seemed oblivious to her presence. Rin took a deep, steadying breath to calm her inner turmoil and exhaled slowly. She took a small step into the forge, but promptly lost her nerve again. The young woman ducked back out into the corridor, cursing her indecision.  
  
Totosai couldn't suppress his warm chuckle --- that was the fourth time Rin snuck a timid glance at him, only to run off again. She must have something VERY important on her mind. And, considering her recent travels and bold behavior as of late, he had a pretty good idea of what it was!  
  
Rin had not grown tired of exploring all of the local trails, and had learned each and every rocky crag and deep crevasse like the back of her own small hand. But now there was simply nothing new left for her to discover here. Totosai scowled. The only thing on their steep slope that ever seemed to change these days was the rapidly increasing level of snow!  
  
When the girl wasn't patrolling the mountain peak or peacefully sketching and carving by the hearth, she filled her time by practicing with her naginata. Gaining control of the spear had done wonders for her self-esteem and she didn't seem so damn reckless and desperate to prove her worth anymore. But he could tell she was rapidly becoming frustrated again, and he hated seeing her so trapped, smothered and stifled.  
  
Totosai's shoulders slumped in sympathy. Maybe his plan to keep the girl hidden away wasn't so brilliant after all. This high, lonely peak was the perfect place for a somewhat cranky old man like himself, but Rin was a vivacious young woman. Too much of her life had been spent in relative isolation already! His wrinkled face puckered into a fierce pout. She DID need to experience new things, damnit!  
  
Enough was enough! Quietly as he could, he tip-toed over to the hallway and waited patiently for her to stick her little head around the corner again.  
  
Simultaneously, on the other side of the rock wall, Rin had crept back to the doorway, and pressed herself flat against its smooth stone surface. 'Okay, this is it --- get a hold of yourself!' She hissed in her mind. After all, if she wasn't even bold enough to ask the question, how could she even think she was ready to be off on her own?! She took another deep breath, gathered her courage and stepped across the threshold --- only to find Totosai's whiskery face mere inches from her own.  
  
"Well, it's about time." he quipped sarcastically.  
  
Rin shrieked and promptly fell on her backside in her great surprise to find the old demon waiting expectantly right in front of her. "Ohhh!" she whispered, rising unsteadily and slapping the dust off her rear, "I HATE it when you do that!"  
  
Totosai flashed a mostly-toothless grin and reached down to clap her on her shoulder. "Well, now that you finally decided to join me, what can I do for you, young lady?" he asked with a sly smile. "I assume there's something you want to ask and that we're not playing some new version of hide and seek!"  
  
Rin blushed. She must look like an idiot! "Ummm, well, YES - in fact, there is something I'd like to request." She paused to collect her nerve again.  
  
"May – May I please, PLEASE borrow Momo to leave the mountain for a few days? I just want to see what's going on out there!" she pleaded haltingly. "We haven't seen another soul in ages, not since Sessho ---" She trailed off awkwardly for the slightest of moments. Damn --- why did it still even hurt to say his name?  
  
She shook her head quickly to clear the memory of that cold, handsome face, and resumed her inarticulate rambling. "Anyway, no one's come here since that night with S-Sesshoumaru-sama and well, you know, that DIDN'T exactly count as a social call." Gods – this little speech was not sounding as eloquent or rational as it had in her mind! She imagined that this is what Jaken must have felt like all those times he squirmed and squawked while making a request or delivering unfavorable news to their lord! Maybe she should have been a little more sympathetic toward the small toad's plight!  
  
She bit her lip fretfully and forced herself to continue. "And speaking of Sesshoumaru-sama, you heard it yourself when HE was here! He said he was tracking another demon! He's probably far, far away right now! So I'll be safe! Plus, I've been practicing --- with this!" She rattled the naginata for emphasis.  
  
"And I'll be careful! I won't go looking for trouble --- and --- and --- Kagome-sama invited me anyway!" She concluded in a breathless huff, watching in apprehension as Totosai stared at her with an amused twinkle in his beady eyes.  
  
"Okay, sure." He said with a simple shrug, turning to resume his work.  
  
Rin blinked. That was it?! It was that easy? "Honto ni?" she asked dazedly.  
  
Totosai laughed back at her shocked expression. "I can't keep you here, girl. This place is your new HOME, not a prison. I'll protect you as best I can, but I've always known you won't be able to hide forever. Besides, I've come upon you staring down the mountain all too often these days --- you look like you wish you were far away. It hurts to see you look so sad." Totosai let out a sigh. "Better you go quickly now, anyway, before we get buried and trapped under a few MORE feet of snow!"  
  
Rin gave a slow, brilliant smile. "Thank you! Thank you!" she shouted in enthusiasm.  
  
Totosai beamed proudly. In the few months since she'd come to live with him, he hadn't seen her THIS happy. EVER.  
  
With a girlish squeal, Rin raced back to her room to clean herself up and pack her gear. She decided to take a quick bath, visualizing possible scenarios of greeting dozens of strangers as she soaked and scrubbed. What would it be like to be around scores of unfamiliar villagers again? What would they think of her? What should she say if someone inquired about her life or her past? And what the HELL would she do if the hanyou and his friends were traveling elsewhere when she arrived?  
  
She shook her head --- it was pointless to fret about it so much! She supposed she'd just have to wait and deal with whatever came along! Besides, she'd faced far scarier things in the relatively short years of her life!  
  
Rin hopped out of the warm pool, splashing water all over the floor in her haste. She combed out her long, wet hair, fully prepared to style it in the usual manner. The young woman suddenly caught a look at her pale image reflected back from the shadowy mineral spring. Her breath died in her throat.  
  
Despite the obvious and pronounced changes that time had granted to her body, she still looked like such a silly little girl. She dropped her hair ribbon and watched it flutter slowly to the dark floor.  
  
She reached up to smooth down her bangs gently, brushing them into a soft part and tucking a few of the longer, more uncooperative strands back behind her tiny ears. There. This was more like the style a GROWN woman would wear. She tugged her pale green kimono back on, and pulled it tighter around her frame than she usually did. It wasn't as comfortable to wear like this, but at least now her trim figure wasn't quite so hidden and shapeless anymore. The young woman shoved out her chest experimentally, pivoting around to critique her form from every angle. She set her hands on her hips and frowned --- she still wasn't used to all these new curves!  
  
Rin suddenly remembered Kagome's face on that long ago evening at the stream --- she hadn't forgotten that soft, beckoning look of pure desire that the miko had given the hanyou as he held her tightly in his arms. She stared into the water and flashed what she thought was a close approximation of that particular expression down at her rippling reflection. 'Okay – now, just make your eyes look a little sleepier, flutter your lashes like there's something stuck in them, and part your lips like you're about to taste something delicious --- perfect!' The young woman stared down at the stranger looking back at her and burst out laughing. Gods – she looked ridiculous!  
  
Rin gave up trying to appear more womanly and mature with a small snort of mock-contempt. She casually smoothed a fine white obi around her skinny waist and gave an impatient sigh. Better to just be herself.  
  
Within the next hour, she had packed some light provisions and a few simple metal-works she could present as gifts. Momo was already waiting impatiently on the ledge, apparently just as excited to be off these icy slopes as she was. Rin imagined that the fat bull would be insistent that they make MORE than a few little detours; he never could pass up a green field where he could graze and roll, after all. She grabbed her extra winter robe and a thick cloak to be safe, readjusted her grip on her light spear, and pulled herself onto the animal's broad back. She bent down, giving the suddenly too-quiet Totosai a light peck on the cheek.  
  
"Now stay out of trouble!" her guardian abruptly ordered, chasing behind her as the bull plodded to the edge of the cliff. "Momo knows the way; you just sit back and let him guide you!"  
  
"I will! I promise!" she yelled over her shoulder as the hulking creature lurched off into the air. "Don't worry - I'll be back soon!" Her final shout of goodbye was drowned out by the gusting wind.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
So --- this was the wretched little village that the hanyou called home?  
  
Sesshoumaru scowled and wrinkled his nose. He did not understand how his brother could endure this place. The scents of smoldering cooking fires and spoiling meat drifted unpleasantly through the breeze, and the rank odors of sickness and sweaty peasants with less than immaculate hygiene clung heavily all around him. "Truly disgusting." he muttered softly to himself. Damn – it was almost as bad as Totosai's forge.  
  
The great taiyoukai lingered concealed within the uppermost boughs of a large tree, keeping watchful vigil over the main square. He supposed he should be at least somewhat grateful for the predictable and offensive nature of most humans. After all, with all this bustling activity, clamoring noise and foul odor, he would hardly need to waste any of his vast power to conceal his youki from his half-brother's pitiful senses!  
  
He was still greatly angered and distressed by the old tree's claims about Tenseiga, and his mind was full of desperate questions that he wasn't completely sure he was prepared to have answered yet. But, all in all, his frenzied wrath had cooled considerably over the short span of his journey to this wretched place. Despite his nagging suspicions and doubts, his customarily cool intellect had won out in the end. He had decided to attempt to remain leveled-headed and composed until he had thoroughly evaluated the current situation. Though it would be admittedly QUITE satisfying to set these useless humans fleeing in mortal terror, he would NOT charge blindly into this miserable village ---  
  
He would NOT make a fool of himself again over a tiny slip of a ningen girl that he should have forgotten months ago.  
  
AND - He would NOT compromise his dignity over some wild, fanciful tale about the full purpose of his sword.  
  
Old Bokuseno simply HAD TO BE MISTAKEN. Though Chichiue did hold faith in some rather whimsical and over-idealized notions, he would not leave HIM a blade with such a ridiculous power and function. Sesshoumaru stroked his chin thoughtfully. He considered the last words of their final conversation all those years ago, as father prepared to charge off to save that simpering human bitch while still gravely wounded from his continuing fight with Ryukossei. One overly sentimental statement in particular had always lingered in his mind to haunt him: "You'll understand my actions one day, my son, when YOU finally find someone to cherish and protect." He shivered reflexively, dismissed his wandering thoughts, and settled back to the task at hand.  
  
His flawless face held no emotion as he stared down upon the humans far below him. The clueless creatures went about their daily routines, completely unaware of his menacing presence. Beleaguered mothers scolded their filthy brats, summoning them home from their games with loud, demanding calls. The local farmers had gathered with their drinks and were chatting inanely about the recent weather and their meager harvests. A few of the younger men swaggered about to hang bright lanterns, providing illumination along the narrow lanes in anticipation of the coming darkness. The predatory youkai flashed a cruel smile. The additional lighting would not help them this night, he mused.  
  
His plan was astonishingly simple: he would wait from this high vantage point until he caught a glimpse of Rin and, within moments, his great senses would confirm the truth. He would instantly perceive that she was merely an ordinary HUMAN girl and that no trace of his youki remained trapped within her. Bokuseno's preposterous account would be proven false and he would be free to continue on his way. END OF STORY.  
  
Of course, he smiled cleverly; the most ingenious part of his whole scheme was the fact that he would never even have to reveal his presence. In the end, no one would be the wiser of his little visit --- not Inuyasha, not any of his obnoxiously interfering friends, and, least of all, certainly not RIN herself. Sesshoumaru sighed. It was truly a faultless arrangement -- - he would not even have to look into her warm, trusting eyes.  
  
He watched intently as giggling village girls came to the communal well to gossip and draw water one last time before complete darkness fell upon them. Perfect. This would be over even faster than he anticipated. Any second now he would single out the small, graceful figure of his former companion. He would see that familiar silhouette --- complete with that damn crooked ponytail which never seemed to tame those thick waves of unruly, windblown hair. At any moment, he would hear her gentle voice and soft, pleasant laughter. Sesshoumaru released a breath he didn't even realize he was holding, shifted his weight, and peered down anxiously.  
  
But long minutes dragged by and still Rin did not appear. He crouched lower on the wide branch, almost as if prepared to spring, and squinted for a better look. The peasant women had finished their evening tasks and ignorant chatter, and were returning hastily to their homes. Sesshoumaru scowled. Why did SHE not join these others? Maybe his original worries had come to pass and Rin did not fit in among her age-mates? Or --- could it be --- could it be that someone HAD already claimed her as a mate? Was she even now curled up beside some wretched human boy? Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed and he felt an unknown tightness in his chest coupled with a strong, unfamiliar knot of emotion. Damn - he couldn't understand why he was suddenly feeling so on edge again, especially when he had much greater problems to deal with!  
  
Besides --- so what if he didn't SEE her now?! That meant nothing. There were other ways to locate the young woman. He forced himself to draw in a deep breath, ignoring the distracting odors of the squalid village to focus solely on identifying the girl's current whereabouts. A small noise of confusion escaped his throat and he frowned, clearly puzzled. There was absolutely no hint of Rin's presence here. Sesshoumaru leapt gracefully from bough to bough in disbelief, moving steadily closer to the modest huts and dusty lanes. He glided down to the forest floor, and stalked through the dense thickets, batting the clinging foliage away from his face in agitation. He paused to draw another deep breath.  
  
There. The hanyou was most definitely here, along with his annoying woman, and usual companions --- but there was still no indication of Rin. Sesshoumaru turned and bounded swiftly through the flooded rice fields of the outlying farms for the better part of an hour. Maybe she had been taken in by one of these poor families? He completed a rough circle around the perimeter of the entire settlement and drew in a final searching breath in utter incredulity. Not ONE trace of her sweet scent lingered here --- not now, and not in the recent past.  
  
His golden eyes widened in shock. Rin had NEVER been in this village.  
  
The taiyoukai immediately found that he had NO further desire to calm the rage he'd been suppressing. A deep, hateful growl began to build in his chest. Inuyasha was going to DIE.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Inuyasha tossed petulantly on his futon. His bed was empty AGAIN. He had retired early for the night, leaving Kagome lost in yet another deep 'girlie' conversation with Sango. When those two had something to discuss, there was simply no interrupting.  
  
Inuyasha sighed resignedly. Well, they did have a lot to talk over these days, after all ---  
  
Soon after they had returned from the little journey to Totosai's mountain, they had made a rather startling discovery --- Kagome WAS pregnant.  
  
The hanyou rearranged his pillow absently, wishing his life was just as easy to resettle! He clearly remembered the night of the previous new moon and how he'd first learned about the shocking revelation. He recalled the curious way his little miko come out of the small bathroom adjoining her frilly bedroom with that stunned expression of shock. Her ashen-face, wide eyes, and that strange, dazed smile of delight had given her secret away instantly. After all, he'd seen THAT same look before when Sango had made her own blushing announcement three years ago. He'd immediately known his situation before Kagome could even open her mouth to deliver the news ---  
  
After all those years of proceeding slowly, after all those days of silent longing, and building their trust and faith in one another bit by bit, it was funny just how quickly caution had been thrown to the sidelines!  
  
Inuyasha drew the thin blankets tighter around his frame and frowned. Maybe he should have gone easier on Miroku and not teased him so damn much --- the priest was right, he HAD cursed himself! Still, it wasn't SO bad, he thought, suddenly feeling that bizarre, giddy swell of pride he always got whenever he imagined holding Kagome AND a little one.  
  
Over the years, he had truly come to love the woman, and all the wonderful things she brought to his life. It was amazing --- he couldn't even imagine spending his days without HER in them. He would remain fiercely committed to doing anything to keep them safe, and was adamantly resolved to making his future child's life better than his own. He just fervently prayed he wouldn't end up like HIS father and hoped could stay alive long enough!  
  
After all, there were still two loose ends that dampened his optimism and excitement --- Naraku and the Shikon no Tama. The hanyou could never forget his original quest, and was still leery about his future prospects and the wicked creature's prolonged disappearance. That last major skirmish was still very much a blur to him, and those grave wounds had made it impossible for him to last all the way through to its conclusion. Inuyasha still wondered just what had transpired between his half-brother and his arch-enemy after he escaped the battlefield. He only KNEW, without a doubt, that Sesshoumaru hadn't killed Naraku! The fucking stuck-up, infuriatingly arrogant taiyoukai would not have been able to resist rubbing that fact in his face if HE'D finally achieved victory where a 'miserable, lowly' hanyou had failed for so many years.  
  
He growled angrily. No --- Naraku was alive and wouldn't stay silent or hidden forever.  
  
But, in the meantime, he deserved some damn happiness for a change! The half demon turned restlessly and let out another sigh of aggravation.  
  
Inuyasha was suddenly distracted from his thoughts as a black shadow crossed the threshold. He felt the abrupt chill of the autumn air as the screen mat blocking the door was swiftly brushed aside. "Kagome?" he whispered softly.  
  
There was no reply. The hanyou's keen ears twitched at the sound of the slightest of steps on the rough wooden floor. It seemed like his mate was feeling frisky and playful tonight. She trying to sneak up on him?! Damn – she was getting good! If her cautious approach had been any stealthier, he might not have heard it at all!  
  
"Kagome," he murmured sensuously, "come to bed, koibito." There was a sudden weight on the futon and he grinned in anticipation. The hanyou turned, blinked sleepy eyes and smiled invitingly, only to be met with a jaw-splitting punch to the face. What the hell ----  
  
Inuyasha shook his head wildly to clear his disorientation. He leapt from the tangled covers, and stared up into the blazing eyes of --- Sesshoumaru?!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	12. Chapter 11

No Inuyashas or Inuyasha-tachi were harmed in the making of this chapter!  
  
Chapter: 11 Tatakai  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Inuyasha gaped up at his elder brother in disbelief. What the hell?!  
  
Sesshoumaru?!  
  
The malevolent creature standing before him was SO unfamiliar. The taiyoukai did not even remotely seem like the rational, balanced and collected rival he had fought and competed against for all these years!  
  
Sesshoumaru's pale, normally impassive features were twisted in undisguised, unrestrained fury. The fine, silky length of his silvery hair was pulled into a high ponytail that only seemed to further emphasize the broadening crimson stripes slicing across his cheekbones. The taiyoukai was dressed in a rich, black haori that would have allowed him to blend in perfectly with the murky shadows --- if not for his glowing red eyes and the shock of white fur across his shoulder, of course. Besides trading in his customary robes of pristine ivory, it also seemed that Sesshoumaru had recently acquired an even more imposing piece of body armor. With a dour frown, the hanyou grimly realized he would have to adjust his customary fighting style to avoid being impaled on those more numerous, farther jutting spikes and barbs.  
  
Inuyasha's quick appraisal of his brother's altered appearance was over in a mere matter of seconds. "What the fuck do you wa ---!?!" he began to bellow, gesturing wildly with his hands. Before he could even finish sputtering his indignant cry of outrage, however, he was abruptly struck again and silenced by a fierce back-handed blow.  
  
"Damare! I appointed you with a small task, otouto," Sesshoumaru spat out bitterly, "One it seems you that you have obviously FAILED. Now, where is the GIRL?"  
  
The great demon paced around the room in smooth, measured steps, though his hostile expression continued to grow more aggressive by the minute.  
  
Inuyasha's eyes widened in dawning comprehension. He laughed scornfully, and absently wiped a trickle of blood from his lower lip with the back of his hand. Sesshoumaru had come for RIN? Why the sudden interest after all these months? Judging by the taiyoukai's obvious wrath and anger, the young woman's prospects did not look very good at all.  
  
The hanyou resolved not to answer any of his brother's questions, and fixed him with a look of equal loathing and malice instead. He stubbornly gritted his teeth. Sesshoumaru's first two blows were nothing more than a couple of cheap shots and he was eager to continue the fight and draw some blood himself! The half-demon reached back for the Tetsusaiga, hidden close at hand and concealed beneath the rumpled pillows of the nearly destroyed futon.  
  
"What's the matter, Sesshoumaru?" he shot back venomously, as soon as his hand closed around the polished sheath. "Starting to realize what a son of a bitch you are? Come back to ruin the girl's life some more? Didn't you destroy her enough already?"  
  
Sesshoumaru felt a quick, inexplicable stab of fear. Destroy? Was that the reason for Rin's absence? Had something befallen her? Had she hurt herself? Wait --- why did he care?! And why was he allowing this insufferable bastard to test his rights and challenge his authority anyway?  
  
"What I do with the girl is NO concern of yours, half-breed." He countered.  
  
"Oh no?" Inuyasha quipped sarcastically, "Well, she became MY concern when you dropped her at MY feet --- remember?!"  
  
Sesshoumaru opened his mouth to deliver a scathing retort, but snapped it shut just as quickly. Try as he might, he found he could not think of a suitable rebuttal. Impossible. He simply could not lose in a verbal war with this dull, slow-witted creature! He blinked rapidly and shook his head in annoyance. Since he momentarily couldn't fire back with cutting words, he opted instead for a surprise slash with his whip. With the slightest flick of his wrist, the coil of green energy and acid shot out instantly, sending the hanyou crashing back through the nearest wall.  
  
Inuyasha cursed and rose from the damp grass with exaggerated slowness. He gave a low, disrespectful chuckle, and paused to brush the many splinters from his red hakama. "Temee --- fucking son of a bitch --- I'm not telling you anything --- not now! NOT EVER!" he roared, "I'll rip your fucking head off! Maybe that'll control your over-blown ego!"  
  
Sesshoumaru laughed haughtily in response. "You just never learn, do you?" he asked, as his eyebrows arched in dark amusement. "You leave me no choice then, Inuyasha. I'll simply pound the answer out of your worthless hide, even if I have to break EVERY bone in your pathetically fragile body." His voice lowered to a deadly whisper, "At least the enjoyment of hearing you beg for mercy will compensate me for the annoying loss of my time." The taiyoukai smiled in secret delight, and flexed his claws in anticipation. For the longest time, he had been lusting after real combat with a worthy opponent, and, at the present moment, could think of NO other creature he'd rather see in pain than his miserable half-brother.  
  
Predictably, Inuyasha merely cursed and snorted at the ruthless threats. "Keh - come on, bastard!" he shouted. "I'd like to see you try." In a practiced motion, he hastily drew the Tetsusaiga from its scabbard.  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed and he drew Toukijin in perfunctory response. The two opponents began to prowl around each other slowly --- stalking one another warily, and looking for the perfect opening to begin the fight. Inuyasha laughed in contempt and tried to goad his older brother with his usual obstinate bravado.  
  
"So, what do you think, aniki?" he challenged, "Maybe I should claim your right arm this time?" He waved his blade for emphasis. "After all, I've already taken the left one once! How LONG was it for that to grow back again?" The taiyoukai merely smiled blandly, though his eyes clearly burned with rage at the casual mention of that long ago pain and defeat.  
  
Inuyasha chose to charge at that moment, swinging the Tetsusaiga in a wide arc with blatant disregard for the narrow confines of the small room or the items held within. Sesshoumaru blocked the blow effortlessly, and snaked out his free hand to rake his poison talons across the hanyou's exposed ribs. Inuyasha grunted in shock and spun nimbly back out of reach, thrusting out with his sword again to keep his brother from advancing as he prepared his next attack.  
  
The furious taiyoukai didn't give his brother any time to recoil and regroup, however. He knew the hanyou's options were limited and that he would never dare to use the Kaze no Kizu in such close proximity to all these 'innocent' villagers. Sesshoumaru laughed --- he was under no such pitiful restraint or foolish sense of obligation! In the next instant, a mighty shockwave of power burst forth from Toukijin and the remaining walls of the flimsy hut came crumbling down all around them with a resounding crash. Through the dust and smoke, he lashed out swiftly with his tail. The coughing half-breed was caught up tightly, and Sesshoumaru found he couldn't resist squeezing the remaining breath from his already burning lungs. The taiyoukai leapt from the smoldering ruins, pulling the constricted hanyou to the dizzying heights of the tree tops. He spun Inuyasha violently and released him in mid-air, smirking with self- satisfaction as he watched the somewhat dazed form of his half-brother hurtle wildly back down to earth.  
  
Inuyasha shook his head to clear his disorientation and rose from the dusty crater formed by his jarring impact. Once more, there was simply no moment to recuperate and recover, and he brought his fist up just in time to block a brutal kick aimed towards his stomach. When Sesshoumaru overconfidently lunged to close in on him again, the hanyou was finally ready and responded with a hard, unforgiving slash from Tetsusaiga. The taiyoukai snarled in surprise and leapt back.  
  
Sesshoumaru paused to coolly inspect the deep, heavily bleeding laceration across his forearm. That bastard had actually managed to draw his blood again! He growled in pure animal fury and pressed his assault with renewed ferocity. The taiyoukai ducked easily under Tetsusaiga's next strike and slammed into the hanyou with all his strength. He caught his struggling brother around the shoulders in a powerful lock, and pinned his arms and sword helplessly to his side.  
  
Sesshoumaru dragged Inuyasha back, digging his claws into a sensitive white ear and reveling in the immediate choked cry of pain.  
  
"I DESPISE YOU – YOU USELESS, WORTHLESS, HONOR-LESS BASTARD!!" he thundered, slamming the half-demon up into a tree at every spoken syllable. Victory seemed near at hand, and he leaned in close, wanting to see the hanyou's eyes when he finally admitted defeat.  
  
Much to his chagrin, Inuyasha merely screamed back in defiance. "WELL --- I FUCKING HATE YOU MORE!"  
  
The trapped half-demon suddenly found the strength to sweep one arm free. He reached back over his brother's shoulder and pushed firmly up on Sesshoumaru's jaw, trying to force those cruel fangs away from his throat by any means necessary. At the same instant, he kicked down hard on the taiyoukai's knee, and grabbed fistfuls of his long, trailing ponytail to pull his head back further. Sesshoumaru hissed in anger, but ignored the sharp sting at his scalp and only tightened his grip. He twisted and rammed in with his armored left shoulder, smiling as the hanyou's bare chest was scrapped raw by the grating spikes of his sode. Gods - he was getting tired of this. The half-breed was simply not smart enough to ever admit defeat and would never tell him what he needed to know.  
  
Sesshoumaru growled. To complicate matters further, he could now hear the excited chatter and buzz of numerous humans. It seemed that the villagers were finally conquering their initial fear and were currently coming forward to investigate the clamor and commotion.  
  
Inuyasha had also noted the sound of the rapidly approaching villagers as well, and, despite his many wounds, struggled back to his feet again with a sudden look of fear. Sesshoumaru watched in dry amusement as the half-demon abruptly turned to race away. He knew instinctively that the hanyou wasn't withdrawing out of cowardice! Inuyasha was attempting to act as a decoy --- trying to lure him away and pull the battle into a place of his own choosing! One look at his uncharacteristically nervous expression confirmed it all.  
  
Sesshoumaru would not take the bait. Instead, he wheeled and spun in an astonishing somersault, landing behind his half-brother to effectively cut off his deliberate retreat. The hanyou was obviously trying to keep him away from SOMEONE in particular! And it didn't take much thought or consideration to figure out 'whom' ---  
  
SHE was nearly upon them, after all!  
  
There was the sudden sound of light steps racing hurriedly through the brush, and an alarmed feminine cry. Inuyasha's white ears jerked forward in panic, as an evil smile alighted on the taiyoukai's face. Sesshoumaru inhaled deeply, and watched as all color drain from the hanyou's face. "How sweet!" he taunted, "that would be the miko, of course! As always her timing is perfect. As you don't seem to fear for yourself, perhaps I'll have to let your woman's suffering loosen your tongue!" In a flash of dizzying speed, the taiyoukai was gone.  
  
"NOOO!" Inuyasha screamed, racing belatedly after his half-brother.  
  
At that very instant, Kagome crashed into the clearing. She had raced all the way back from Sango and Miroku's hut in terror as soon as she'd seen the rising plumes of black smoke and heard the unmistakable sounds of battle. She shook her head slowly in denial, still not daring to believe all the destruction was occurring at her own home! The miko automatically dropped to the ground the second she registered Inuyasha's strangled howl. She gasped in shock as a tangle of red, black and white blurred past her, and then screamed in terror as the rolling, snarling figures came into focus. Inuyasha was fighting with --- SESSHOUMARU?! Both brothers were bruised and bleeding heavily, and Kagome's heart lurched in cold fear. She had never seen them clash like this --- not even in those early days! This was no test, and they were not competing over something --- they were really trying to kill one another!  
  
Inuyasha attempted to spare a quick glance at Kagome to check her safety and distance from the fray. That split-second, that one little look, was all Sesshoumaru needed. He thrust Toukijin cleanly through the distracted half-breed's side, and delivered a vicious blow to his stunned face, releasing a full blast of poison. Inuyasha stumbled to his knees, and clawed madly at his eyes, trying to relieve the awful burn. Sesshoumaru turned swiftly and moved in on his next target in another lightning-quick attack. He pulled the miko up from the forest floor roughly, and dragged her back up into the lower branches of a tall tree.  
  
The taiyoukai stared down at the wounded hanyou impassively. "I know you can't see right now, otouto." He gloated with teasing slowness. "But I can be most kind and describe your bitch to you. I can assure you, at the moment, she is QUITE terrified."  
  
Sesshoumaru looked over Kagome's shaking form and suppressed a chuckle at her obvious 'condition'. Unbelievable. This woman was carrying his half- brother's child already? He shook his head in slow, mocking disapproval. "Now --- what will it be? The information I require or your mate's life? Or I should say, your mate AND your pup's life? You didn't tell me I was going to be an ojisan --- but then again," He smoothed his hand over the miko's slightly rounded belly while Inuyasha growled in helpless rage, "maybe I won't be after all."  
  
Sesshoumaru felt Kagome's powers flare in determined self-defense and he watched as a pale pink aura began to build around her. He was fully prepared for this event, however, knowing all too well of a mother's desperate longing to protect her children, even in the face of death and insurmountable odds.  
  
"I would NOT do that, priestess." He chided in a soft, deadly whisper. "You may manage to cause me temporary pain with your ridiculous power, but think of your child. Think of the youki in its blood, pathetic and polluted as it might be. Do you honestly think your unborn mongrel could survive should you attempt to 'purify' me?"  
  
Kagome let out a harsh sob of fear and instantly relaxed into the cold demon's steely grip. "What do you want?" she bit out in a scathing whisper, gazing down into the unfocused eyes of her wounded mate. Inuyasha shook his head vaguely in silent apology and dread.  
  
"I only want what is mine." Sesshoumaru answered quietly. "Now --- where is the girl?"  
  
"Rin?!" Kagome squeaked in panic. Is that what this was all about?! "You're looking for Rin?"  
  
"Who else, miko," he breathed into her ear. "Answer me --- NOW." He tightened his hand dramatically against the woman's belly again.  
  
That small motion was Inuyasha's breaking point. Though he could not see what was happening, he could hear the tell-tale, soft rustle of cloth as his brother's clawed hand dragged --- he could smell the immediate sharp spike in Kagome's fear.  
  
Inuyasha snarled and hurled Tetsusaiga as far away from himself as he could. He didn't want the sword now anyway, and his instincts were clamoring at him to let go. He wanted nothing more than to sink his fangs into flesh, and to use his sharp claws to rip out his brother's black heart. He was past caring, past hope, and past any thought but getting Sesshoumaru's bloodstained hands off of his mate. Rage was boiling inside him, screaming at him to kill this vicious predator. For the first time in his life, he welcomed his uncontrolled transformation and the added power it would grant him. He only hoped it was enough. Inuyasha felt his mind begin to cloud and he charged blindly towards Sesshoumaru with a savage roar, taking the taiyoukai nearly by complete surprise.  
  
Sesshoumaru blinked in shock. That idiot had purposefully abandoned the Tetsusaiga and was welcoming youkai rampage?! His brother's stupidity was truly boundless! Sesshoumaru cursed and shoved the terrified miko into Inuyasha's path to stall him. The woman's shriek was cut off as she collided viciously with the charging demon. The pair tumbled to the hard ground with Inuyasha twisting instinctively to absorb the brunt of the fall. Sesshoumaru leapt higher into the tree branches to glare down upon them in continued frustration. Kagome groaned weakly and slipped into unconsciousness as the bleeding hanyou cradled her in his arms.  
  
Inuyasha dragged in deep, panting breaths as he searched Kagome's form for injuries. His proximity to the woman and the strength of her holy powers had caused him to regain some control over his mind and thoughts. All this pain --- all because of Sesshoumaru! Why?! He turned accusing, blind eyes towards his older brother.  
  
"RIN?! This is all about Rin?" he shouted, "You cruel bastard! I don't care what you've done to me! I can understand you hating my 'dirty-blood'! But that girl never did anything but CARE for you! You selfish son of a bitch! You kept her! You arrogant, cold-hearted --- You MADE her what she is, warped her heart and mind so they revolved around NOTHING BUT YOURSELF! Then you threw her away and left her without a word! Left her to exist for nearly all time with nothing but ---" Inuyasha's mouth snapped shut with a gasp, realizing he might have said TOO much in his scathing tirade.  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes widened and blood turned to ice. What did the hanyou just say? EXIST FOR ALL TIME?  
  
Bokenseno had spoken the TRUTH. Inuyasha had just inadvertently confirmed it. Tenseiga HAD done something to Rin.  
  
But how the hell would the mongrel know? How could he learn about the sword's powers? Who else knew about the great blades? Sesshoumaru's eyes darted wildly and his cunning mind leapt to the only possible conclusion. "Totosai." he gritted. Son of a bitch! He flashed a wicked mockery of a smile.  
  
Inuyasha blanched when he heard the old smith's name spoken out loud. "Fuck ---" Sesshoumaru had suddenly become way too quiet again. Somebody was going to die.  
  
"Wait!" the hanyou barked.  
  
As he charged away on a cloud of youki, Sesshoumaru dimly heard the hanyou cry out for the rest of his pathetic friends. It wouldn't be long now before he was pursued by the other members of his half-brother's ragged circle of clinging companions. Good --- let them come. He'd leave them all as broken and beaten as Inuyasha himself.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Kagura fumed in angry silence as she regarding the waxing moon. This was simply beyond humiliating! Here she was stuck in some godforsaken little forest waiting for any signal or word from her master. She cursed Naraku, the world, and, most of all, herself. If only she'd had the foresight to show more patience and composure at the beginning of all this! If only she'd swallowed her pride in those early days, and acted compliant and humble, maybe she could have lulled Naraku into a false sense of security. But it was too late now. Her rebellious behavior had forevermore cast her under a shadow of suspicion and these days she was seldom allowed to know the full details or scope of Naraku's schemes. Oh well, she thought dryly, at least Kohaku had managed to gain his freedom. That fact alone meant there was some small amount of hope for herself.  
  
She looked down resentfully at the child-like demoness waiting patiently beside her. Kanna had no such mutinous desires and seemed quite content with her station. In fact, her "sister" did not even seem aware of her present enslavement at all.  
  
Kagura sighed in sheer boredom. With any luck, maybe Naraku would order her to finally chase down that wretched wolf and his jewel shards. She bristled, remembering how the arrogant young demon had gotten the better of her in their last fight. Simply humiliating. She'd heard he had moved north, joining the scraggly remains of his pack with his mountain kin. Kagura smiled at dark thoughts of tearing the brainless ookami limb from limb as he pleaded for mercy.  
  
She was suddenly distracted from her 'pleasant' fantasy by a faint, melodic sound drifting on the breeze. The demoness stared down in curiosity. A young woman was walking unhurriedly along the forest trail below, humming softly to herself as she traveled through the night. Kagura's eyes narrowed in instant recognition. Sesshoumaru's little brat --- all grown up?! Unbelievable, the demoness mused, just look at her now! What a complete change! The girl strode along confidently, followed closely by a rather dopey-looking youkai bull. When they reached the edge of a small green field they parted company, as the animal paused to graze greedily. The girl smiled and continued to walk on, her shoulders squared and her chin held high. All and all, she seemed nothing like the babbling creature with the unending questions and piping voice that Kagura remembered her to be.  
  
No wonder her master had pushed her away! This creature was everything a demon would love to corrupt --- innocent, beautiful, sweet, and pure. Despite the cold and unfeeling attitude he projected, Sesshoumaru must have been taxed to the very limits of his endurance by the mere presence of this fetching little thing. Kagura thought of her last encounter with the taiyoukai and smiled wickedly. If the demon lord could see his 'little girl' now, she doubted he'd even recognize her! Despite Kanna's soft cry of protest and surprise, Kagura pulled her feather from her elegant bun and swooped down to confront the young woman.  
  
Rin had been enjoying her pleasant journey so far. The only thing that concerned her was that it might be over all too soon. Despite his great bulk and pudgy appearance, Momo could travel at incredible bursts of speed when he was so inclined. As night fell upon them, she had pointed out the green fields below and guided him down from the sky. She left the animal to forage happily and had decided to wander through the woods for awhile. She sighed and smiled up at the thinning canopy of fall leaves high above her head, admiring how their brilliant colors appeared so soft and muted in the clear moonlight.  
  
Rin suddenly noticed that the forest had gone eerily silent. No owls or insects were calling from the trees and no small animals could be heard rustling in the undergrowth. She tightened her grip on her spear and backed up slowly. No doubt about it, there was a predator nearby. It was definitely time to find Momo and continue on again --- NOW! She kept her actions calm and deliberate, as if she hadn't detected anything was out of the ordinary. The young woman certainly didn't want to give whatever was stalking nearby the chance to change its strategy. Whenever the creature made its move, she would be ready.  
  
Despite being prepared, Rin still gasped as a blur of violet streaked past her. She was forced to cover her face for protection as dry dust and fallen leaves swirled around wildly in a suddenly raging wind. Rin drew her naginata up in self-defense and cracked an eye to look upon the stately, pale form of --- Kagura?!  
  
"You?!" she exclaimed in shock. What the hell?! Of all the miserable luck! The first time she attempted an extended overnight trip and THIS is who she encountered!  
  
Rin quickly buried her fear and stared defiantly into Kagura's blazing red eyes. She suddenly found herself wishing she were taller. Gods – it was infuriating that even after all these years she still had to look UP at the smug demoness. She felt like a pathetic little girl again, caught squirming and swinging by the scruff of the neck in this youkai woman's grasp. "What do you want?" she asked brusquely.  
  
"Relax, dear-heart," Kagura began in a silky voice. "I just came to get a better look at you."  
  
Kagura walked slowly around the young woman in appraising evaluation. Rin glared back angrily, feeling like the demoness was finding her somewhat lacking.  
  
The youkai smiled at the heated, irate flush of color presently staining the young human's cheeks. Damn - pushing the girl's buttons wasn't nearly as difficult or as interesting as rattling Sesshoumaru! She shrugged. Oh well ---- it could still be rather entertaining in its own way!  
  
"What's the matter, tiny cricket, not as chirpy and chatty as you used to be, hmmm?" the wind-witch asked sarcastically. "Strange, but the last time I saw HIM, your master wasn't very talkative either. But then again, that was for a completely different reason --- if you KNOW what I mean?" Kagura tapped her chin with her fan solicitously, and gave a mocking laugh. "No, I suppose you wouldn't, would you? Poor sweet, little virgin." she crooned, leaning in close to savor the girl's reaction to her words.  
  
Rin instantly felt her heart twist. What was that? Sesshoumaru-sama and KAGURA? She had grown up in the wild and had a rough understanding of the act of rutting, but still did not know the finer points of just what happened when it was between a man and a woman! Her eyelids fluttered and she felt the burning taste of bile in the back of her throat. At the moment, she couldn't concentrate on anything. All she knew was that she truly despised the idea of Sesshoumaru-sama together with this --- this ---  
  
With a pained growl, she thrust the naginata out with more speed than she knew she possessed. Rin had the sharp blade pressed tightly against Kagura's throat before the demoness could even blink. "Y-you --- s-shut up!" She grated.  
  
Kagura had not been expecting such a reckless move and she gasped in surprise at the unfamiliar feeling of cold steel resting against the pale column of her neck. Damn- what was happening to her lately? First, Kouga and now this insignificant little wretch had managed to get past her defensives? She quickly recovered from her astonishment, however, and gave a short cynical laugh.  
  
"Ohhhh." she whispered derisively, "Very good. Now put that thing down before you hurt yourself, cricket. As much as you'd like to kill me, you know THAT won't work. Naraku holds my heart and I cannot die --- you've seen it for yourself."  
  
Rin nodded sadly, knowing full well that the demoness was not lying. Kagura's eyes sparkled with malevolent delight at the girl's expression of acceptance. "That's right. Settle down this instant, jo-chan." She commanded, "After all, I'd hate to separate that pretty little head from the rest of you!"  
  
The young woman reluctantly lowered the pike. "I don't need to listen to you." She stated flatly. "If you're going to kill me --- just do it! But nothing you say can hurt me."  
  
Kagura's ruby lips twisted into a sardonic smile, "Oh – you're so adorable when you lie! What's the matter, darling? Not feeling a little jealous, are we?"  
  
"Certainly not of YOU!" Rin bit out impulsively. Kagura's head jerked up in shock and her crimson eyes once again narrowed into predatory slits. Did this insignificant insect just dare to insult her? Why that little ----  
  
Rin braced herself for the inevitable retaliation. She knew in her mind that it was beyond foolish to challenge this deadly woman, but what else could she do? She was completely at the youkai's mercy, and death was imminent whenever the demoness grew bored of toying with her emotions. She sighed in resignation and watched as Kagura's fan was snapped forward in a cutting motion. In the next instant, she was knocked off her feet and tumbled head over heels from the force of the gale raging all about her. She crashed to an abrupt halt at the base of an old pine and reached up with her hands to stop her head from spinning. She closed her eyes and waited for the inevitable second volley of cutting wind to slice her apart.  
  
To her great surprise, it never came and Kagura merely burst out laughing instead. Rin stared up in confusion --- this was definitely not the reaction she'd expected! Maybe she should just get the hell out of here! She shook her head to clear the stars dancing before her eyes, and hauled herself to her unsteady feet. She turned to flee ---  
  
And promptly found her path blocked.  
  
A second demoness had suddenly materialized about thirty paces away. Rin backpedaled quickly --- she had never encountered THIS pale entity before but shied away unconsciously on sheer instinct. Something was VERY wrong with this person! As the child-like youkai advanced steadily upon her, the young woman realized that she held an odd glowing object in her unnaturally white hands. She squinted through the darkness --- What was that? A mirror?! Rin stumbled and automatically closed her eyes to avoid looking into the peculiarly gleaming glass.  
  
Kagura gasped at the current situation. Sesshoumaru's girl WAS a pathetic, weakling BRAT but she didn't mean for the fiery little thing to come to any real harm! Why had Kanna suddenly decided to interfere? Why was she intrigued with her at all? This couldn't be good.  
  
She materialized instantly at the fallen young woman's side. "Go --- now!" she hissed down vehemently, trying to keep her lips as still as possible so Kanna could not see the full scope of this newest little betrayal. Rin looked up in shock as Kagura rolled her eyes. "Don't look so surprised, you fool! After all, YOU helped me once --- now we're even! GO!"  
  
The stubborn young woman still seemed too stunned by her selfless act to move. "Aho! Get out of here now, you brainless little ---" Kagura gritted. Rin didn't wait for the youkai to finish the rest of her insult. She gave a shrill whistle for Momo and darted back into the underbrush.  
  
Kagura watched her race away, suddenly filled with a deep sense of foreboding. She turned slowly, smoothing her hair and shaking her head. She tucked her fan into her fine obi, and stalked angrily over to Kanna.  
  
The small demoness had presently flipped her mirror around and was staring emotionlessly into its shining depths, slowly stroking her pallid fingers over whatever image she had managed to capture. Kagura peered down sullenly and stared into the mirror with bored curiosity. She instantly gasped in astonishment at what she saw ---  
  
Rin's reflection still rippled on the glass, just as frightened and apprehensive as she'd appeared mere moments before. But a vague, rather familiar figure now stood behind her in the glass.  
  
Sesshoumaru! How? What the ---  
  
Kagura whipped her head around in reflexive panic; just to be sure the imposing demon wasn't actually in the glade with them! She released an automatic sigh of relief --- the taiyoukai was most definitely NOT present. So, why then was he in the mirror?! What did this mean?  
  
Kagura was deeply concerned, but she masked her confusion with a small shrug and tried to act as casual as possible.  
  
"Very interesting, my dear, but not out of the ordinary!" she commented nonchalantly, "I'm not surprised in the least, you know. That empty-headed child dotes on Sesshoumaru." She snorted rudely, "There's simply nothing else in that vacant mind but thoughts of HIM --- after all, he was her master for the longest time!" She gave a nervous titter of laughter, hoping to stop the smaller youkai from investigating further or pursuing the fleeing girl.  
  
"No," Kanna slowly breathed, "this is something else --- some other connection. Naraku must be informed." The ashen, colorless child began to glide away slowly.  
  
Kagura's hands balled in fists of frustration. No – this did not bode well at all. "Wait!" she shouted indignantly, "Where are you going?!" Kanna merely continued to ignore her and surrounded herself in a pearly ball of jyaki nearly as bleached and translucent as the rest of her.  
  
The wind-witch stood in momentary indecision. Here was her chance! Naraku's real presence and location would be revealed! But someone had to alert Sesshoumaru to the fact that trouble was most definitely headed his way. However subtle or arrogant his actions appeared, the taiyoukai HAD aided her somewhat in the past. Kagura worried her lip and hesitated for the slightest of moments.  
  
No, she decided suddenly. No one would stand in the way of her freedom and nothing would deter her from finding Naraku. She needn't concern herself with the taiyoukai, his former ward, OR whatever strange power linked them together. She quickly withdrew the downy feather from her hair again and spun into the sky in pursuit of Kanna.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Shippou padded noiselessly on his tiny pawed feet to cautiously make his way into the hazy clearing. The sickly-sweet smell of noxious poison hung heavily in the air and he stifled a gasp of horror at the sight of the smoldering remains of Inuyasha's hut. The fox turned and spun wildly in the fog, searching for survivors. He suddenly noticed two distinct figures huddled tightly together and cried out in instant recognition. "Kagome! Are you alright?" he wailed. "What's happening? They're saying it was Sesshoumaru! Was he here for Rin?! The other's are after him right now!" He leapt forward to attempt to reach his adoptive mother's side.  
  
Inuyasha's head jerked up the moment he heard the kitsune's plaintive, cries. "Shippou --- NO!" he roared, "Stay away!"  
  
The fox froze immediately. He knew THAT strange, deadly voice and altered scent only TOO well! The hanyou was a full demon now! "Inu-Inuyasha?" he whispered fearfully.  
  
"Shut up! Listen!" Inuyasha rasped, "Being this close to Kagome is keeping me in control, but not for very much longer! I need you to find Kaede RIGHT NOW! I need her to come and pick up Tetsusaiga --- I threw it away into the woods over there!" He nodded to the left and Shippou could see the wicked gleam of elongated fangs as he turned. The fox circled around the demon slowly, moving in the direction he'd indicated. He gasped in surprise and terror at his friend's bloody, beaten form and vacant red eyes. The kitsune nodded obediently, temporarily at a loss for words, and raced off instantly in search of the elderly miko.  
  
Shippou found her several frantic minutes later as she struggled to calm a panicked, milling crowd of villagers in the main square. "Kaede!" he yelled, "Come quick! Inuyasha and Kagome are hurt!"  
  
"I know, boy! I'm trying!" she wheezed. "Inuyasha's elder brother has been quite ruthless. These people are terrified and frightened out of their minds! And a fire has broken out in the shrine!"  
  
"Please!" Shippou continued breathlessly, "If you don't come now it's only going to get worse! Inuyasha's lost the Tetsusaiga! If you don't hurry, there'll have been TWO full demons tearing through this village this night!"  
  
"Oh dear!" Kaede murmured, "That does change everything!" She shuffled from the disorderly scene, limping in the kitsune's wake. With a soft growl, Shippou turned back to patiently carry her back to the clearing. Within moments, the fox had sniffed out the Tetsusaiga and the aged miko slowly bent to retrieve the great sword. As Shippou stood in nervous watch, she pushed it as close to the growling dog-demon as she dared.  
  
The moment Inuyasha's hand closed around the hilt of the blade, he heaved a great sigh of relief and pressed a lingering kiss to Kagome's temple. His claws retracted and his unfocused eyes slowly faded from crimson to deepest gold. Damn - Sesshoumaru had got him good this time. It would be hours before his sight returned and this puncture in his chest healed. He dabbed at the wound in his side experimentally and winced at the feeling of the steady flow of blood. That fucking son of a bitch! He was going to kill his half-brother!  
  
Inuyasha's white ears flicked forward and he focused his senses on nothing but the woman in his arms and his child within her. After a few tense seconds he decided that everything seemed alright. Though the rhythms seemed much faster and more erratic than usual, he could still clearly discern two distinct heartbeats pounding out loud and strong. He sighed in short-lived relief.  
  
Okay --- Kagome and the baby were going to be fine. But damn – there were SO many other things to worry about now! He wasn't prepared for this current situation in the least ---  
  
"Shippou!" he called out again suddenly.  
  
"Hai?" the fox responded with a sniffle.  
  
The blinded hanyou jumped with a start --- the kitsune had answered from much closer then he expected. Inuyasha's heart turned bitterly. Shippou doubtlessly must have crept in to be nearer to Kagome. He knew the pain the fox must be feeling at the sight of the still unconscious miko --- he felt the very same anguish and fear himself.  
  
But the hanyou wasted no further time with sentimentality. "Listen Shippou!" he growled, "You said the others are chasing Sesshoumaru, right? Well, I need YOU to do something too!"  
  
The fox leaned forward in expectation. "What?" he whispered conspiratorially.  
  
"You need to RUN now --- you need to get to Totosai's forge before that bastard! He KNOWS Rin's hiding there! You've got to warn them. I don't know what Sesshoumaru means to do, but you see what he's capable of!" The hanyou frowned, and tenderly stroked his mate's damp hair; as Kaede reached down to help him to his feet.  
  
Shippou's emerald eyes widened in understanding and then flashed with a gleam of deep pride and honor. His chest puffed out heroically and he leapt to his feet. The hanyou was entrusting him with such an important mission -- - never mind that he was the only one left behind!!! He experienced a quick, delightful vision of Rin displaying her gratitude to him for saving her life and imagined her praising his valiant bravery in the face of the evil, wicked, hideous Sesshoumaru. He continued to snicker as he suddenly pictured Kohaku's jealous reaction. "All right!" he shouted in a dashing tone, "Leave it all to me!"  
  
There was a loud snapping noise and Inuyasha could feel the fox's youki flare all around him. The kitsune divided into at least a dozen or so multiple versions of himself, each turning to disappear into the forest with a jaunty flick of a fluffy red tail. "We won't fail, Inuyasha!" they called back together.  
  
The hanyou smiled as the many identical voices assailed his ears in unison. Perfect. Sesshoumaru would have a hard time deciding which scent to hone in on! But then again ---  
  
Inuyasha felt sudden trepidation for the fox's mission. As much as they antagonized one another over the years, he'd come to view the obnoxious little brat almost as his own. "DON'T STOP, Shippou!" he bellowed, "And stay out of HIS way if you can!"  
  
The hanyou shook his head feeling utterly miserable and helpless. He gingerly picked up Kagome, and allowed Kaede to help guide him to her home to recover.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sesshoumaru hurried onward, determined to reach Totosai's mountain by daybreak. However, Inuyasha's rag-tag companions were steadily advancing in their pursuit, and he resolved to pause and deal with them here and now. After all, he did not want them to get in his way or interfere when he finally arrived at the old demon's forge.  
  
It was no sooner than he had decided to lie in wait and ambush them, when he found HIMSELF the victim of a similar trap.  
  
He suddenly detected a familiar, though VERY unanticipated, presence to his right and there was an abrupt searing flash of pain in his left shoulder. What the fuck?  
  
Sesshoumaru reached up to pull a wickedly curved sickle-blade from his flesh. With a roar of outrage, he wound his wrist around the long attached chain and viciously tugged his hidden assailant into the open.  
  
The taiyoukai was not at all surprised by his attacker's identity --- the distinctive weapon itself had provided all the information he required. After all, he'd seen it all too many times before.  
  
He stared hard into the young demon slayer's face as the boy stumbled out from his hiding place in the shadowy treetops with an exclamation of surprise. His brown eyes were clear and free --- Naraku's old servant had somehow finally broken from his mind-control and had joined up with Inuyasha's pathetic band!? With cool precision, Sesshoumaru hurled the sickle back at its owner, smiling in pleasure as the blade struck home to slice deeply into the muscles of the boy's thigh. Kohaku cried out in shock and pain, and tumbled from the tree branches.  
  
As the taiyoukai watched the young man fall, a deep swell of hatred burned in his mind. This was the vile little creature that had tried to kill Rin all those years ago. Yet despite that fact, AND the threat of continued harm, she had always displayed deep concern and empathy toward his plight. It was just another example of her warm, trusting heart overriding her common sense and reason! He scoffed and arrogantly brushed past the downed boy, casting a critical eye over his wounded leg. The cut was deep, and he doubted the young man would be able to stand, let only mount another pathetic assault.  
  
"Bakemono! You fucking bastard! I know what you're going to do!" Kohaku shrieked out behind him, "Get back here --- leave HER alone!!" The boy pulled the blade from his leg with trembling fingers, and then rose unsteadily to his feet. He tried to stagger out of the underbrush, leaning on the trees for support as he drew his short sword. He slashed clumsily with the weapon, as Sesshoumaru casually ducked out of the way with ease.  
  
"She's so much better than you!" the boy continued to rage through gritted teeth. "And you'll never even realize it! You treated her like nothing! Like she had no value!"  
  
Sesshoumaru bristled. This was the second time this night he had been accused of harming Rin's mind. He shoved the bleeding boy back to the ground violently, and began to move on, deep disdain evident on his face.  
  
But Kohaku only crawled to his knees and stubbornly persisted with his outburst. "I can't even show her the love and care she deserves, because she's so scarred by YOU!" he cried heatedly.  
  
Sesshoumaru's steps halted abruptly and he gasped. When he sent Rin away he had thought himself prepared for the inevitability of the girl taking a mate, but he had never prepared himself for being confronted with a possible face for that man. He felt his anger explode at the mere thought of THIS boy putting his hands on her.  
  
He turned and shot forward in a shadowy blur to grab Kohaku by the throat. He lifted the struggling young man from the ground and held him high in the air --- just as he'd done all those years ago. He gazed coldly into his helpless opponent's face. It would be so damn easy to snap his wretched neck! Kohaku clawed wildly at his striped wrists, his eyes rolling back into his head at the lack of oxygen.  
  
Suddenly a deep, commanding voice called out from behind them. "PUT HIM DOWN!"  
  
It would seem that the others had finally caught up. After one last shake, he threw the demon hunter's limp body to the ground and turned slowly to face his new opponent. The taiyoukai had been waiting for THIS particular enemy, after all.  
  
Though he did not fear any of his brother's companions, THIS one was the only one who posed ANY possible threat --- the monk.  
  
Sesshoumaru smirked and regarded the man with a frosty glare.  
  
"Now," Miroku began warily, eyes darting back and forth between the demon and the injured Kohaku. "You must stop. I can't let you go any further without knowing your intentions toward the girl!"  
  
The taiyoukai laughed mirthlessly. "Human - it is not your place to interrogate this Sesshoumaru!" He turned and took a deliberate step back, clearing defying the monk's order. Miroku shook his head. "I warned you --- don't move!" he cried. He reached out to untangle the shiny prayer beads sealing the air void in his cursed hand. Sesshoumaru merely smiled once more --- he had been counting on this little response. Inuyasha's friends were so damn predictable in their behavior. Once again, they would be defeated by their own unsurprising and utterly banal actions.  
  
Miroku's violet eyes widened in shock as Sesshoumaru charged directly at him just before the Kazanna burst open. The taiyoukai dodged at the last possible second, slamming into the priest and wrenching his arm around to aim the wind tunnel in a direction of his own choosing. Miroku wrestled and twisted in the great youkai's powerful grip --- but to no avail.  
  
"So --- where is your woman, houshi?" the demon taunted sarcastically. "Let's find her together --- shall we?"  
  
There was a sudden flash of red flames bounding through the trees and Sesshoumaru spun his hapless prisoner again to face the charging taijiya and firecat. Within seconds, a woman's scream and a feline roar rang out; the noises unmistakable even over the deafening roar of the air rip. The priest stared in horror as Sango and the Kirara were dragged steadily forward, caught helplessly in the maelstrom.  
  
"No!" he shouted, "I beg of you!"  
  
"You understand what you need to do then, priest?!" Sesshoumaru queried, shouting into the monk's ear to be heard above the raging wind. He watched with interest as the woman and her youkai mount struggled to hold onto anything to keep their distance from that endless black hole. But even the very trees they sought to cling to were being pulled forward to disappear down that bottomless path to hell --- soon there would be nothing left!  
  
"No!" Miroku moaned. He slumped weakly in defeat and nodded his acceptance. The taiyoukai instantly slackened his hold and freed priest's other arm. The man quickly looped the beads back around the Kazanna and cried out as the exhausted Sango and Kirara crashed down to the ground. He tried to rush to their aid, but Sesshoumaru merely drew Toukijin, and brought the blunt end down across the man's temple. He released the priest to watch him collapse to the ground like the others.  
  
The taiyoukai leapt back to check on the female taijiya. The woman was dazed but awake, her leg pinned at an odd angle beneath the unconscious fire-cat's body. She groaned weakly and fixed him with accusing eyes. "Don't you dare hurt her!" she rasped, "Rin saved our lives from N-Naraku!"  
  
Sesshoumaru frowned, somehow not surprised in the least to hear of another act of selflessness and bravery from his former ward.  
  
"And, thanks to your foolishness THIS NIGHT, you nearly almost lost them all again," he commented blandly in response. Sango gritted her teeth with helpless fury.  
  
"Stay down, woman, do not pursue me. Should any of you attempt to follow, this Sesshoumaru will not show you ANY mercy." Sango twisted as far as she was able to look back at the crumpled forms of her husband and brother. Miroku was still out-cold, while Kohaku convulsed with deep racking spasms as he struggled to regain his breath. "I can't wait to watch when Inuyasha finally kills you!" she spat. Sesshoumaru bit his lip to hold back his laughter. "Human," he responded, "your wait would be in vain --- that day will never come." He glided away without a second glance.  
  
There. Inuyasha's pathetic allies were no longer any threat. Only one creature remained unaccounted for, however: that irritatingly optimistic kitsune. Sesshoumaru's nose twitched as he tried to find the annoying creature's scent. Damnit, with all these ridiculous delays, the fox had gotten ahead of him. He had had ENOUGH of this foolishness. No more distractions, no more interruptions, and no more wasted time --- he would find Rin NOW. His vision blurred and he allowed his youki to build, twisting into to his full, towering form. He charged off towards Totosai's mountain --- there was nothing left to stop him.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin's heart was still pounding as Momo cantered across the early morning sky. Gods - she couldn't believe she had managed to escape from Kagura! And that other demoness?! Who was she? And just WHAT did that strange mirror do? The young woman cautiously searched her body for any injuries in the soft light of dawn. She found herself a bit bruised from when the wind- witch had sent her sailing into that tree, but she seemed unhurt otherwise.  
  
Suddenly, without warning, Momo snorted in fright and veered sharply in the air, plunging and bucking furiously in fear. Rin threw her small arms around the bull's thick neck, trying desperately to hang on and keep from falling to her death. She regained her balanced as the bull climbed higher into the billowing pink clouds. She stared down to search out just what the hell had caused the beast to shy so violently. The girl cried out in terror --- far below her a great demon was on some berserk rampage. It charged wildly through the woods, uprooting tall trees and causing all manner of lesser-demons, birds, and forest- animals to flee before its wrath.  
  
She wheeled Momo higher into the sky. She couldn't get a clear look at the beast from way up here, other than a few flashes of silvery white. The young woman decided it didn't matter --- she had quite enough adventure for one day and didn't need to investigate further. Besides, the crazed, brutal creature was fortunately moving in the opposite direction than she was headed! Rin exhaled slowly --- she'd hate to be the sorry individual that THAT monstrous youkai was pursuing! She clicked her tongue, urging Momo to continue his flight. Thank goodness this strange trip would be over shortly and they would be relaxing at the miko's village soon!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Yes, I had Kohaku sneak up on Sesshoumaru! I figured it was maybe SLIGHTLY possible considering he wasn't expecting the boy to be with Inuyasha's group now. (Besides, he's a tad bit upset, you know!) Whatever, it's a story!  
  
Damare – Shut up! Silence!  
  
Otouto – little brother  
  
Ojisan – uncle  
  
jo-chan – cute name for "little girl", kind of like "honey" (Kagura being super dry and sarcastic!)  
  
Aho – Idiot, moron  
  
Bakemono - monster 


	13. Chapter 12

Not much action here! Just poor Rin experiencing a bit of medieval Japanese mob justice; some painful love advice - "hanyou style"; Shippou doing his best impersonation of Paul Revere; and, of course, the Lord of the Western Lands getting a tiny lesson in humility! Some spoilers I guess --- a small reference to the episode "That Jaken Who Became Ill"! Thank you once again for taking the time to read and review my story.  
  
Sorry that it looks like I updated – next chapter won't be out till Thursday or Friday! Just needed to switch all those "jyakis" to "youkis" and reread to make sure everything was OK ---  
  
Plus, I saw a review where someone said it was their birthday! Hey, Ashes of the Star Phoenix --- HAPPY SWEET SIXTEEN!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Chapter 12: Ketsui  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Rin brought Momo down from the sky about a mile outside the miko's village to proceed on foot again. She remembered all too well how most humans reacted when confronted with someone or something different, unfamiliar and strange. The young woman couldn't imagine a more outlandish pair than herself and the tubby youkai bull, and she somehow doubted the villagers would feel very comfortable if they just descended unannounced from the clouds above.  
  
Her nervous excitement increased ten-fold as she wove her way steadily through a grove of saplings. A real village! What would it be like?!  
  
She hoped she wasn't being too forward with this visit. It had been quite a long while since Kagome-sama had invited her, after all. She tried to recall what little she could remember of human etiquette and practiced her speech of introduction in her mind one last time. Finally, she paused to remind herself not to falter when she looked at or spoke with the hanyou.  
  
Little by little, the sun was creeping higher into the sky behind her in a brilliant display of pink and vibrant orange. The villagers would doubtlessly be waking now, rising groggily, lighting their cooking fires and readying themselves for a new day.  
  
Rin recalled a bit of her life before Sesshoumaru-sama. How she'd always loved those leisurely, sleepy mornings when she would shyly watch her mother prepare the family's meal, humming softly to herself while she worked. She sighed and drew in a deep breath.  
  
Strange, but she didn't remember those gentle, comforting morning fires smelling like this! The scent she picked up now was of a raging inferno gone out of control, not some cheery little hearthside blaze! She quickened her pace in confusion.  
  
For such an early morning hour, there was an awful lot of racket ahead too! Through the dense curtain of dry leaves, she could hear loud, panicked yelling, and shrill shouts. Were human settlements always this noisy in the morning nowadays? What was going on? Village life had sure changed a lot --- or perhaps her own memories were so old that she had merely remembered them wrong!  
  
Whatever the case --- she was finally at the edge of the forest. She took one last steady calming breath, wiped her clammy palms on her hips, and stepped out of the woods, only to gasp in shock at the sight before her ---  
  
The village was in utter chaos and near ruins. Its people fared no better and were mostly fleeing in jumbled confusion and terror. A few huts were nearly destroyed by fire, and she noticed that one home in the distance seemed absolutely pulverized and smashed to the ground. Rin coughed in the smoke and haze, and breathed in faint traces of a decidedly familiar floral scent. What?!  
  
"Who goes there?!" cried out an old, maternal voice from the early morning mist. The young woman jumped at being addressed and discovered so quickly.  
  
"Me?" Rin squeaked in reply, shrinking back as many armed men suddenly poured into the dusty lanes, brandishing any weapon they could carry. 'Me?!' She repeated in her mind. How stupid could she be? Like any of these people knew or cared who 'she' was! Within seconds they had surrounded her, and Rin moved in slow, deliberate circles, trying to keep them back with her spear. Her breath caught at the unmistakable sound of bows being drawn behind her. "Hold! Don't fire those arrows!" shouted that old, dry voice again. "I would speak to the girl."  
  
The crowd parted somewhat unenthusiastically and an elderly woman hobbled forward. Rin watched her approach with apprehension. The woman was dressed in the robes of a priestess, and she was missing an eye. Though she seemed ancient, worn and frail, her voice held a deep resolve and strength, and the men obeyed her words, lowering their weapons reluctantly. Rin relaxed her guard slightly --- somehow this woman appeared like someone she could trust.  
  
"Who are you, child?" the old miko queried.  
  
"Please, I've come to see Kagome-sama and the half-demon, Inuyasha." She answered, eyes darting to keep watch on some of the more unruly members of the mob. "I-I'm a friend --- sort of. At least, I hope."  
  
The miko laughed at the girl's candor and honesty, even in the face of such a dangerous situation. "Well, child, you have picked a rather unfortunate time to come. Our village was raided by a most fearsome demon last night. A demon, I might add, who was searching for something VERY peculiar indeed." Her eyes narrowed and her brows lowered as if in deep consideration and thought.  
  
The young woman noticed that the miko's look had taken on a strange, knowing light, almost as if she'd just come to an important realization.  
  
Before Rin had time to pose any questions or requests of her own, however, one of the village men dashed forward, grabbed her from behind, and knocked her unexpectedly to the ground. She collided heavily with the dry earth, and the naginata slipped from her clutches to clatter out of her reach.  
  
"Yes, Miko-sama --- I heard everything!" the man bellowed above her, seeming to address the assembled crowd more than the old woman herself. "The demon said it was seeking a young woman. And look what comes upon us! I say we tie her in the forest, and leave her for the beast!"  
  
Rin gasped in confusion and fought to pry her hands free from his unforgiving grasp. If only she could grab her spear! A few of the villagers pressed forward to try and claim the rich weapon for themselves, or at the very least knock it out of her reach, but the youki in the blade flared when anyone came to close. The strange, burning power only seemed to reinforce their fears and suspicions of her and the shouts from the crowd became more rowdy and violent.  
  
Rin tried to keep herself from being distracted by their increasingly sadistic threats and jeers. She was finally able to twist one hand free and she struck out blindly, managing to brush against the polished edge of the spear. Suddenly, another man strode forward brusquely and stomped mercilessly on her fingers. Rin yanked her hand back with a hiss of pain. The man leaned over her and helped his brutish companion haul her to her feet by the collar of her robe. He leered in her face, his breath reeking of some strong drink. "Either that, or I say we kill her now --- slit her throat and throw her body in the river! Then that thing will have NO need to return!" he spat cruelly. Rin eyes widened in horror, but she refused to cry out, even as far too many hands to count reached to claw and tear at her at once.  
  
The crowd pressed forward eagerly, knowing she was helpless. This was just like what used to happen when she was small! She curled up instinctively to shield herself from the beating that was sure to follow ---  
  
"Stop this at once!" thundered the old woman again, moving quickly to stand before her in defense. "This child is not your enemy!" the priestess angrily addressed the two men pinning her down. "Release her this instant!"  
  
"Fools," she admonished slyly, as they grudgingly complied, "if you think that demon was angry before, what do you think it would be like if its quarry were killed by someone else?"  
  
Rin's mind went blank as she stared at the miko, just as bewildered and confused as everyone else present. Demon's quarry? What? What were they all raving about?  
  
"Nay!" the miko asserted, spinning to direct her words to the crowd. "She came to see Inuyasha, and to Inuyasha she shall go. He will know what to do --- he will decide her fate."  
  
Rin blinked, still trying to process what was going on all around her. She had hardly envisioned ANY of these nightmare scenarios in all her girlish day-dreams and fantasies for her visit. First Kagura, then a fuming mob and --- and then a powerful demon attacking the hanyou's village while searching for a young woman? Her hazel eyes widened in shock. It couldn't be ---  
  
She was suddenly distracted from her disturbing thoughts, as the old miko pulled her forcefully from the rough circle of drunken men. The old woman hovered close and guided her by the shoulders through the still leery crowd; she allowed Rin to slowly pick up the naginata again. The dazed girl snatched the weapon up quickly, and resolved that the spear would not slip through her fingertips again. Another droning murmur was instantly taken up to reverberate wildly through the assembled villagers the moment her hands closed around the clearly 'enchanted' weapon --- 'perhaps this girl is a demon as well!'  
  
As she was led away and marched past that one rather destroyed home, Rin noted that it hadn't been charred by ordinary flame at all. It had simply been blown apart --- blasted into tiny pieces! There were jagged claw marks in the surrounding trees, and their boughs were cracked and splintered by that same tremendous, unnatural force. She inhaled deeply again, and then cried out in panic. One didn't need youkai senses to recognize the distinctive scent all around this clearing --- she had grown up knowing it. The Dokkasou.  
  
There could be no doubt. "Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin breathed, her face going deathly white.  
  
"Aye, child," the woman beside her replied. "And I assume you are the one who was once his ward. Sesshoumaru was here no more than a few hours ago seeking you. He battled fiercely with Inuyasha --- the hanyou seems to have lost that fight." They moved to the low porch of another modest home and Kaede gestured that she enter.  
  
"Go slowly, girl," she advised, "His eyes were burned by poison and his vision has not yet fully healed. And I'm afraid the only thing darker than his sight at the moment is his mood."  
  
The old miko sighed and tried to offer a somewhat encouraging smile. "But then again, as I imagine you already know, he is always rather curt and bad tempered anyway," she mumbled.  
  
Rin was still too stunned to respond, but she weakly nodded her thanks to the woman and entered the hut. She gasped in shock at the sight before her.  
  
The hanyou was reclining on a small pallet in the corner of this sparsely furnished home. He held both the Tetsusaiga and his mate, and it was hard to tell which one he gripped tighter. As the miko had warned, his golden eyes were blank and strangely out of focus.  
  
Inuyasha was bruised and battered, and even his fine, silky hair appeared to be clotted with old blood. His chest was bare and bandaged heavily, and Rin stared at the bright crimson stains welling under those stark-white strips of cloth. For his youkai blood to be taking so long to heal, the wounds under those dressings must be awfully deep, she reasoned.  
  
She continued to gape at his many injuries in sympathy and guilt. She hadn't seen her former master inflict such a savage pounding on his half- brother --- well, not since she was very young! She rushed forward towards him, despite the old miko's words of caution.  
  
Inuyasha growled menacingly as she drew closer. His vision was still rather blurry --- he was starting to be able to distinguish bright light and deepest shadows, but not much else in between. His nose twitched as he recognized her all-too-familiar scent, and his face hardened with an ironic sneer.  
  
"What the hell are you doing out here, Rin?" he began gruffly. His tangled silvery mane shook as he gave a clipped, sarcastic chuckle. "Fuck - your timing is just as good as Kagome's," he added caustically.  
  
"I wanted to --- see ---" Rin trailed off. She stopped in her tracks, completely unsure of how to respond. She stared down instead at the stricken miko now, her eyes coming to focus on a sickly purple bruise above the woman's right eye.  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama --- did this?" she whispered brokenly, even though she already KNEW the answer.  
  
"Yes," Inuyasha confirmed with a deep sigh, "He's looking for you and he knows about Totosai --- he's on his way to the forge right now." The hanyou shifted and leaned forward anxiously. "Rin, listen to me, you've got ONE chance here. I can't help you for a few hours, and the others are gone. They're off following Sesshoumaru --- trying to slow that bastard down any way they can. You only have a short time before he realizes you're not on that mountain and he has to turn back to track you."  
  
He paused to consider his next words carefully. "You have to run now --- head north. We have some allies up there --- a wolf with some jewel shards, maybe his pack could keep you save until we arrive."  
  
"Ookami?!" Rin gasped in revulsion, "No!! Never! I KNOW who you're talking about!" Her jaw clenched, and she reached up automatically to run her fingers across the scars on her throat, trying to clear her memory of that long ago terror and pain.  
  
"You want ME to run to that dense, conceited beast, Kouga?" she gritted. "But it's because of HIM and those w-wolves that I – I ---" She felt an intense wave of nausea and couldn't choke out the rest of her words. The young woman struggled to regain her composure.  
  
"I'll have nothing to do with THEM!" she stated with absolute finality  
  
Inuyasha nodded in understanding. He'd never heard Rin's voice that strong or decisive before. So, much as he'd always suspected, the wolves HAD indeed killed her. He'd thought as much since the very beginning, clearly remembering their faint scent upon her when she was small. He wrapped his arms around Kagome's shoulders possessively, and pulled her into his lap to rock her gently. He tried to will his pounding head-ache away, wracking his mind to come up with an alternative plan for the girl's temporary safety.  
  
All the while, Rin paced about the small room in agitation, thoughts still reeling from trying to absorb her current situation. Out of the corner of her eye, she absently watched one of the hanyou's clawed hands as it reached down to tenderly pat Kagome's belly. Rin suddenly became aware that the miko's stomach was slightly swollen ---  
  
"A baby?!" she squeaked numbly.  
  
Inuyasha drew a deep breath, still finding that he flushed with pride and delight at the mention of his future child --- even despite the dire circumstances and doubts of the present moment. "Yeah," he confirmed awkwardly, giving Kagome another squeeze. "We found out not long after we left the forge ---"  
  
Rin shook her head in sadness and moved to stare out a small window to watch the rapidly growing morning light. "I am so sorry," she breathed. "I could have gotten you killed --- Kagome-sama and your child, too."  
  
"It's okay, Rin --- the only life you should be concerned with right now is your own," Inuyasha stated ominously.  
  
"He was THAT angry?" she asked quietly, moving away from the window to stand closer by his side.  
  
Inuyasha looked up and squinted at an uneven, shifting shadow that he supposed was the girl's form. He nodded slowly. "Yes. I'm sorry for all this --- I'm sorry for everything that cold, selfish son-of-a-bitch put you through ---"  
  
Rin's heart twisted in agony. Despite feeling angry, resentful and currently deathly afraid of Sesshoumaru, she still found herself leaping immediately to his defense.  
  
"Don't!" she hissed vehemently, completely cutting the hanyou off. "Don't you speak poorly of him --- not ever! Everything I am, my very life --- I owe to Sesshoumaru-sama!" She felt a few pathetic tears begin to build around her eyelashes and she struggled to prevent them from falling.  
  
"Owe him?" he barked in surprise. "Keh --- tell me, will you still feel such 'loyalty' and 'devotion' when he turns on you like an animal and claims your life!?" He carefully re-shifted his poor miko so he wasn't yelling in her ear and waited for a response.  
  
Rin fell silent, carefully debating his piercing, truthful words.  
  
Inuyasha cursed his blindness for the hundredth time that morning. He wished he could read the girl's expression, and not just focus solely on the continuing scent of her tears. He felt absolutely horrible for hurting a woman.  
  
But though he HATED being so blunt and direct with an already suffering and traumatized girl, maybe, just maybe, his words would snap her into reality. She might realize the true depth of her grim position and flee, just like he instructed. She was being awfully quiet, he realized uneasily. Just as quiet, in fact, as Sesshoumaru had been the instant he had figured out her whereabouts.  
  
Though he couldn't see, the hanyou suddenly sensed that the girl's fear had abruptly died. Her heart slowed, and an eerie sort of peace and resolve came to settle all about her.  
  
"Goodbye, Inuyasha," Rin stated. Though her voice was a whisper, her words were annunciated carefully and they did not waver. "I'm very sorry I was so rude to you when we first met again. It's hard to look at you, without being reminded of him. It's mostly your eyes, you understand?" she explained slowly.  
  
"Please tell Kagome-sama I'm truly happy for her --- your child is sure to be beautiful."  
  
"Damnit, Rin!" he bellowed, drawing an unintelligible moan from the woman in his arms. Gods – if only Kagome would wake up! Maybe she would have better luck reasoning with this girl! He fucking didn't understand women or their stupid emotions at all!  
  
"NOTHING can change HIM --- do you hear?!" he shouted on. "NOT YOU! Not anything!" He lay the miko down gently and tried to rise. Damnit, he might as well have stabbed Rin with the rusty, blunt form of Tetsusaiga --- that was the only pain he could imagine that could possibly be more excruciating and vile to her than his cruel words!  
  
Rin rounded on the hanyou swiftly. "I know, I know!" she cried out, not even recognizing the bitter voice she heard as her own. "I KNOW what I am, and what I'll NEVER be! I understand that I'm not the 'answer' he wants or seeks --- but I --- I love him all the same."  
  
Inuyasha's face contorted in shock and disbelief. Love Sesshoumaru?! Over the past few months, he had come to suspect and realize the true depth of her misguided feelings for his elder brother --- but to actually hear the words declared out loud! What a foolish path her heart had chosen! He winced in sympathy.  
  
"Rin," he appealed logically, making a soothing gesture with his clawed hand. "You're even more blinded than I am right now! Sesshoumaru CAN'T love you --- he doesn't even KNOW what it means to love ANYTHING! Don't live like this --- don't be trapped by the memories or promises of the past! Believe me, I know what happens if you try!"  
  
"I'm so sorry," she repeated again firmly, "but I have to go back. I won't hide from him anymore."  
  
Inuyasha heard the soft flap of fabric as the mat across the doorway was drawn back. With one more soft whisper of farewell, the young woman was gone. There was nothing more he could do.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin walked slowly back through the village. Despite their earlier threats of violence, the crowd let her pass unharmed and unchecked. In fact, they kept a rather wide distance now, almost as if she were something loathsome, wicked or diseased. Many averted their eyes and would not even dare to gaze upon her. They seemed afraid that even one small glance would curse them to be haunted forever with her misery and obvious misfortune. She became aware that a few of the village women were making a superstitious sign as she passed, as if trying to ward themselves and their clinging, filthy children from evil. The rumors were obviously still flowing and they appeared to instinctively know she was most likely going to her death.  
  
Rin suddenly imagined what she must look like to these rustic, simple peasants. At worst, she was nothing more than a pale, walking corpse, just as spectral, mysterious and terrible as Kikyou. At best, she was something to be pitied, a hapless, doting fool who had lost her heart to a monster, just like the hanyou's mother, the lady Izayoi.  
  
In either case, one solitary thing remained painfully clear and true. She did not belong in the human world --- not that she ever did to begin with, she supposed.  
  
She kept her head high, her spear at ready, and her gait slow and solemn. She noticed Kaede helping a young family repair their damaged fence. She nodded gratefully to the old woman and smiled bitterly. The miko would doubtlessly be called upon to practice numerous exorcisms on this day to rid her "evil" aura from the village.  
  
Only when she was sure she had drifted from everyone's sight did she break into a frantic, headlong sprint. She raced back to the meadow where she had left Momo to be safe. A lot of good that had done! The beast's head popped up from the weeds in shock at her rather quick return, and he bawled out in distress. Rin pulled herself onto his back and slapped his rear to get him moving.  
  
"Come on --- we've got to get back to Ojii-sama's! There's trouble!" she shouted. Those little words got the laconic creature moving faster than any jab of her heels or sharp cry ever could. She hung on for dear life, as the bull bolted them into the air at full speed --- she only hoped she wasn't too late.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Shippou hauled his exhausted body to the near pinnacle of Totosai's mountain, still not daring to believe that he had actually gotten here first. The others doubtlessly MUST have engaged Sesshoumaru to buy him some time. He wiped his brow and grimly hoped they didn't have to pay too dearly for it. He slid down into the main cavern of the forge, rousing the sword- smith from his slumber with his loud, resonating cries.  
  
"Jiji!" he shouted frantically, shaking the old creature's shoulders. He paused to take in a few great panting gulps of air. "Get Rin-chan! Sess- sesshoumaru is coming --- here --- coming here now!"  
  
"What?!" Totsai bellowed back in confusion, as he rubbed sleep from his eyes.  
  
Shippou dragged the old man to the entrance of the cave and pointed frenetically down to the valley below. "We just couldn't stop him --- he just sort of figured it out!" the poor fox wheezed some more. "Now --- where – is --- Rin?!"  
  
"RIN?! Rin's not even here! She went down to visit ALL you people!" Totosai stammered, a wild, fear-driven light taking hold in his eyes. "Oh dear!"  
  
Now it was his turn to shake the poor, already-dizzy fox. "Surely you didn't see her?!" he rasped, "How could you have missed her? Oh - might she have taken to the sky?!"  
  
Totosai shuffled all the way out onto to the cliff shelf. "Oh dear," he muttered again as his eyes fixed on a rather ominous cloud of dust in the distance. Shippou gasped – he could feel a tremendous force of youki speeding below, even from this great distance and height. He looked up at Totosai beseechingly, anxious for any plan or direction. "Jiji --- if you have ANY ideas, I'm ready to hear them --- right now!" he sang out nervously.  
  
The old demon merely sighed. "Yep, just ONE --- you'd best get out of here, boy. This is an enemy you can't face yet."  
  
Totosai flicked some soot from his striped robe and heaved his mallet over his shoulder. "Besides, I've always known a day like this would come, almost from the moment Inutaisho told me the Tenseiga would be entrusted to his eldest son," he murmured. "Oh well." He started to trundle down the mountain path.  
  
The tall kitsune followed closely at his heels. "But, Jiji, Sesshoumaru hurt Inuyasha pretty badly," he argued. "And the others who went out to slow him down --- I haven't even SEEN them at all!" Despite his fear of the powerful, vengeful taiyoukai, Shippou seemed reluctant to leave. "What can you do alone against THAT?" he asked, stepping back reflexively as the approaching cloud twisted to reveal a monstrous, ravening white dog.  
  
Totosai smiled over at him patiently. "Why – I can reason with him."  
  
Shippou stared at the old youkai with equal amounts of disbelief and horror. "R-reason?" he stuttered. Totosai seemed like the least sane creature he'd ever met!! And the predatory beast Sesshoumaru had become at the present moment seemed far from rational either! How the hell would they reason with each other?  
  
The sword-smith chuckled warmly at the much younger demon's dubious expression. "Seriously, get going, my boy." he repeated. "There's nothing you can do here. Go see to your friends. Besides, maybe you can find Rin. Find her and keep her away from here --- if you can!"  
  
Shippou's green eyes widened in sudden understanding. He gathered his remaining strength and power for the long race back to Inuyasha's forest. "Good luck!" he whispered to Totosai. He darted back down the steep slide, veering out of the taiyoukai's path to settle his senses on locating the missing girl.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Sesshoumaru loped up the mountain, not caring that the poison in his talons and jaws was steadily carving a trail of charred foliage and melted rock in his wake.  
  
Just as he reached the snowline, a sudden blast of fire burst forth to singe his shoulder. He spun around, tossed his head and bayed riotously at the ridiculously shriveled figure of Totosai. A billowing trail of black smoke still poured from the corners of the sword-smith's mouth from that scorching blast of flame.  
  
The old demon was sitting nonchalantly on a large boulder, his shoulders hunched in the driving wind. The old fool seemed more rattled by the blustery weather than the fearsome creature roaring above him.  
  
With one last snap of his fangs, the taiyoukai released his transformation to confront his attacker face to face. He needed to speak and he needed answers --- NOW!  
  
YOU!" Sesshoumaru spat vindictively, "This is the last time you and that damned half-breed conspire against me! Now --- where is she?! Where is the girl?"  
  
"What girl?" Totosai asked absently as he scratched his head.  
  
Sesshoumaru stared menacingly. This was ludicrous! Maybe he should just rip this exhausting creature to shreds! "Temee --- DO NOT play the fool with me any longer!" he grated, baring his still formidable fangs.  
  
"Girl? Girl? Hmmm---" Totosai rambled idly as if deeply perplexed, "Ohhh --- I know! Do you mean the girl that you selfishly threw away and thoughtlessly abandoned? Is THAT the one you're looking for?!"  
  
Sesshoumaru was too angry to reply with anything but a furious growl.  
  
Totosai merely rolled his eyes at the enraged youkai's animalistic response and laughed. "Wan, wan, wan --- get off MY mountain, you spoiled hound! Go bark somewhere else!" he shouted rebelliously.  
  
With another angry snarl, the taiyoukai whirled and leapt forward into the air, crashing down to deliver a powerful strike from Toukijin. The shockwave of youki caused the very ground to shake, and the heavy snow on the crags above them began to rumble and slide.  
  
A sudden wall of blinding white powder came crashing all around them, and Sesshoumaru glided easily into the air to avoid it. He smiled maliciously as Totosai was knocked inelegantly from his perch and dragged further down the slope in the roaring avalanche. The dog-demon continued his rapid climb up the mountainside, completely ignoring the faint struggles and cries of the old demon fading behind him.  
  
The taiyoukai reached the cavern quickly, and burst inside with a feral shout of triumph. His voice echoed back hollowly, and he nearly fell to his knees and collapsed as he recognized the flowery, unmistakable scent of the girl all around him. Even under the choking stench of that uncontrolled fire, how could he have missed THIS the last time he was here? He lowered Toukijin and stepped further into the foundry, completely unsure of his next action.  
  
Though her fragrance continued to surround him, he could tell in an instant that Rin was not here at the present moment. Just where the HELL had she gone now!?  
  
To his surprise, the rather bedraggled, rather angry form of Totosai suddenly darkened the mouth of the cavern. The soaked demon strode past him with nothing more than a livid glare and a scathing curse. He moved to sink cross-legged by the hearth and warmed his red, shaking hands over the fire.  
  
"You see, arrogant boy?!" Totosai scolded through chattering teeth. "If you'd just waited a few more seconds, I would have told you SHE'S NOT HOME!" He paused briefly to shake some more snow from his billowing sleeves.  
  
Totosai placed a battered kettle over the flames and began to prepare himself a cup of hot tea. "Could have spared you that ridiculous final charge, you know!" he mouthed sarcastically. "Not to mention, I could have spared myself that freezing plunge!" he added with another shiver.  
  
Sesshoumaru considered the smith's words and actions with a grunt of surprise. This frail, obnoxious collection of bones was tougher than he appeared, he grudgingly admitted. Or else even crazier than you first guessed him to be ---  
  
The taiyoukai momentarily disregarded the old man and moved to the racks of weaponry and armor, staring vacantly up at the decorative carvings adorning most of them. He glanced back down at his own sode in disbelief. He had wondered where he had seen these flowing motifs and patterns before. Damn, he truly HAD been blind. He'd seen them in his own home in the west, scrawled over numerous scraps of parchment, or else scratched into the dust and ash beside many small campfires as they'd all traveled together.  
  
These were Rin's drawings.  
  
He closed his eyes. For a split second, he wished his hair were loose so he could hide his stunned expression behind the flowing curtain of it. She must have been here that night he claimed this piece of armor. SHE was the hidden creature cowering in the corner. That was twice he'd doubtlessly scared the hell out of her and put her in fear of her very life, he realized grimly. But he couldn't think about that now. He straightened his shoulders and whirled to face Totosai.  
  
"What has the Tenseiga done to Rin? If you had any loyalty to my father, you will explain the sword's powers to this Sesshoumaru --- NOW." he commanded.  
  
Totosai's beady eyes widened in surprise. "You mean you'll actually listen to me for once --- you'll wait till I'm finished?" Sesshoumaru nodded his head slightly in acquiescence, but otherwise gave no other emotional reaction.  
  
"And --- and you'll not harm HER until I've explained everything?" the smith carried on fretfully.  
  
The dog demon's expression went rigid, and he tightened his grip on Toukijin. "You know this Sesshoumaru can make NO such promise, old man," he warned.  
  
Totosai grew nervous in the lengthening silence that followed. He hastily decided to proceed, taking note of the taiyoukai's increasingly sinister look. What choice did he have left?! He just fervently hoped the fox would find the girl and keep her away!  
  
He began, "Your father had the Tenseiga commissioned to bestow a youkai's life span upon a mere human. But there was a trade --- it took a lot of his power."  
  
Sesshoumaru scoffed and snorted. "Obviously, fool --- Ryukossei should never have been able to bring him down otherwise! This useless sword YOU crafted brought about his ruin!"  
  
Totosai's eyes burned bright at the vehement accusation. "Hey! You're pretty damn quick to place blame, aren't you boy?! Everyone's accountable in your eyes, except for yourself, huh?" he shouted back angrily.  
  
The old demon thumped his chest soundly. "Well, I'm smart enough to admit my skill isn't perfect! A sword that heals?! Really! You try devising a way to harness that kind of power without completely draining a demon or killing the human in the process!"  
  
He settled back down and reached to pour the boiling water from the kettle. "Anyway, neither of us was really sure how it would work. In fact, I wasn't even sure if the sword was finished before your father had to rush it off to use on Izayoi --- poor thing! Strangled by some jealous, power-crazed daimyo! At the time, the loss of some of his youki and power was a small price to pay for the safety of his new mistress and infant son."  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed bitterly. He didn't want to hear any more about Inuyasha or his pathetic whore mother! "What about Rin? Now what have I 'lost' to her?" he asked.  
  
"That remains to be seen," Totosai mumbled mysteriously, pausing to take his first sip of tea. He looked away and shook his gray head. "I know you didn't intend to 'do' what you 'did' to the girl. But it's TOO late now! The Tenseiga hadn't been used on a human in decades when you chose to revive Rin! Of course, it wanted to reach out to her fully! Don't punish her for your arrogance and pride!"  
  
"But this Sesshoumaru has used that cursed sword on demons as well!" he raged with sudden fury, as images of Jaken and Kagura and even that anonymous, weak otter youkai rushed through his mind. "Are you telling me I've sacrificed MY great power to THEM as well?"  
  
"Impatient boy! No - you don't lose any of your youki to other demons! They have their own!" Totosai shot back.  
  
He answered the taiyoukai's continuing glare with a small one of his own. "Rin is the ONLY one who draws on a small, inconsequential, insignificant, scrap of your power --- she can't do anything with!"  
  
The taiyoukai arched an eyebrow dubiously --- the old demon wasn't telling a lie, but he could sense he wasn't being entirely honest either. Before Totosai could even register the movement, Toukijin was pressed firmly against his wrinkled throat.  
  
The sword-smith stared up in shock, and instantly recognized that Sesshoumaru's look had changed from merely dark to downright murderous. He wrung his hands and admitted, "Well, she can CALL out to it sometimes, but ---"  
  
Sesshoumaru blinked. "Call out to it?!" he growled, "Nanda?! Then that WAS her!!" His words faded into an incredulous whisper, "I --- felt --- her one morning."  
  
The taiyoukai's amber eyes drifted shut as if he were in some deep pain, and he pulled Toukijin back slowly. Wait a minute, Totosai was not going to rush through and gloss over this part!  
  
Even as he lowered his sword, he snaked out with his free hand and dragged the ancient youkai to his feet. "Explain 'call out to it' this instant, you half-wit! Can the girl draw MORE into herself?" he thundered.  
  
"I'm not sure!" the aged demon wailed. "It's one of the things we never got to test! I told you --- your father died first! And with the loss of the tie to his power, Izayoi succumbed not long after!"  
  
He wanted to change the subject quickly as possible, but a green crackle of youki burned around Sesshoumaru, clearly warning that he would not let this go until his curiosity was completely satisfied.  
  
Totosai's shoulders slumped in defeat. "As for Rin pulling in more youki, I just don't know the answer," he conceded, as he tried unsuccessfully to shrug out of Sesshoumaru's painfully tight grasp. "I'd been wondering if you felt what happened that morning! Little thing grew angry at me for doubting her abilities and foolishly grabbed a youkai spear."  
  
He shook his head with an equal mix of sadness and wonder. "Poor girl!" he continued, "She accidentally touched the youki keeping her alive when the weapon began to overwhelm her. Damn, it nearly killed her!"  
  
Sesshoumaru turned to hide the expression on his face. That was the Rin he knew; always so proud, fearless and fighting to prove herself even when a situation was hopeless. But he couldn't dwell on those thoughts. The girl was proving to be an even greater liability to him than he ever imagined.  
  
"Who else knows about this 'bond', old man?" he snapped.  
  
Totosai shrugged. "Just myself, Inuyasha and his companions, I think," he replied. He counted off on his fingers while Sesshoumaru growled in stunned, suspicious fury.  
  
"Oh yeah!" the sword-smith finished a little too brightly, "and, of course, obviously whoever it was who initially clued you in about the whole matter knows as well!"  
  
"Bokuseno," Sesshoumaru mumbled flatly, turning to fold his arms across his chest. He was suddenly reminded of Inuyasha's weakness on the night of the New Moon, and the multitude of people who seemed to be aware of his limitations. Was HE to be flawed and burdened like that as well?!  
  
Totosai snapped his fingers. "Damn, Bokuseno –I should have known! I haven't been out to see him in centuries!"  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes and leaned wearily into the wall --- he couldn't wait to be away from this crazed, overly-optimistic old mad-man. "Shut up," he ordered coldly.  
  
The aged demon sat back down in a huff and dragged in another gulp of tea, wishing the drink could be something stronger. He peeked back at the haughty taiyoukai from behind his mug. "There is ONE more person, of course, who knows. You do realize that Rin herself has been made aware of all this," he stated in retaliation, intensely curious to observe the taiyoukai's response to his words.  
  
Sesshoumaru stiffened instantly. In spite of it all, he couldn't help wondering how the girl reacted to the news. It doubtlessly must have made his rejection and abandonment all the more difficult for her to abide. He didn't have to embarrass himself by inquiring any further, however; Totosai volunteered the information and rambled on automatically.  
  
"She's been overwhelmed with grief and so unhappy. It's not easy for a human to accept such a gift --- especially when they're completely lost and alone. It was much the same for Izayoi."  
  
With those little words, Sesshoumaru suddenly made another startling realization: just as he'd automatically reacted with revulsion when Bokuseno compared his mother to that useless woman, he ALSO felt a stab of anger when Totosai measured Rin against her as well. Rin was nothing like that whimpering, sniveling, groveling bitch!  
  
Totosai turned to regard the taiyoukai with great interest. Sesshoumaru had begun growling again and was currently massaging his temple with a clawed hand. "What does this --- power --- make Rin now?" the dog-demon asked pointedly.  
  
Totosai frowned and answered quickly. "Who cares what she was or what she IS now! She's herself!" he shouted. "What would it matter if she remained human --- I don't see many demons lining up to protect your back. Well, you do have Jaken, of course, but even you have to admit the girl is several thousand times more pleasing to the eye!" he finished with a merry chortle and moved to refill his cup.  
  
Sesshoumaru scowled. "Then she is still merely human," he stated stubbornly.  
  
"Yeah, sort of, I guess – but what does it matter! You two have so much in common!"  
  
Sesshoumaru stared back incredulously. "What?" he spat.  
  
"As I recall," Totosai challenged, "when your mother was taken from you, you didn't appear much more than a few years older than Rin when you first took her in! She's an orphan too! Have you ever had to listen to her dreams at night? Who does she call out for?"  
  
Sesshoumaru turned away. He knew the answer immediately. Her mother. When the night terror wasn't about the wolves, it was always about the mother and the family she'd lost so long ago.  
  
Totosai continued fervidly, pointing an accusing finger. "You BOTH saw the ones you loved killed before your very eyes and were powerless to stop it! I think maybe that's why you took pity upon her in the first place," he asserted. "Plus, the two of you are BOTH pig-headed, willful, proud, and stubborn as hell!"  
  
Sesshoumaru straightened suddenly and paced away. He didn't need to listen to these foolish, sentimental ramblings.  
  
Totosai followed him angrily with his eyes. Damn – the boy looked so much like his father! "But with your pride, I sense another trend in you, Inu no Taisho. For years you've scoffed at your birthright, and called the Tenseiga useless. Seems like you tend to cast things off without understanding their true value. You don't recognize what something's truly worth until it's nearly lost to you. You were so preoccupied with your brother's inheritance that you failed to appreciate the full power of your own! That's what got you in this predicament in the first place!"  
  
Sesshoumaru said nothing. He turned back into the forge, his face the same bored mask of neutrality as he stared into the roaring flames.  
  
"Oh – speaking of little brother, I hope the mutt is still is in one piece?!' Totosai inquired conversationally behind him, hoping to break the uneasy spell of silence from the taiyoukai.  
  
Sesshoumaru threw him a scathing look. "More or less," he uttered, though his expression warned that he'd prefer either silence or to remain on the topic at hand.  
  
Totosai shrugged. "Well, I've told you all I know and as I see it, MY LORD, you now have two choices," he pronounced airily.  
  
Sesshoumaru's expression tightened in resentment and fury, but he appeared to be listening intently. The flames cast him in an eerie combination of ghostly shadows and otherworldly light, and his eyes glowed with wrath.  
  
"ONE, you can kill Rin. You can simply strike her with the Tenseiga and re- absorb your power."  
  
Sesshoumaru barked out a skeptical laugh. "You would DARE to tell this Sesshoumaru how to reclaim the power that has been stolen by HER?" he asked suspiciously. "You ARE even more foolish then I thought! What makes you think I won't simply destroy the girl and take MY youki back!?!"  
  
"Simple," Totosai grumbled evenly, "You couldn't kill her all those years ago when you first found her --- when she meant nothing to you! If you couldn't do it then, there's NO way you can do it now, especially not since you've come to know her --- since you've come to CARE for her," he challenged. The old demon smiled calculatingly as Sesshoumaru's mouth opened, then snapped shut just as quickly.  
  
"Ahhhh – you'll graciously allow me to continue!" the sword-smith joked. "TWO, you can take her back under your protection."  
  
"You interfering, obnoxious, mindless --- you've been PLANNING this all along!" the taiyoukai bristled.  
  
"You should be thanking me, you ungrateful pup!" Totosai snapped back, "I've given you a way to keep her AND your precious, over-blown, misguided, warped sense of dignity!"  
  
"How did this all get started anyway?" the smith continued to rant, throwing his hands in the air. "Some half-demon questioned your relationship with her? Your friendship with her! If you're SO exalted, mighty and untouchable --- what does one opinion matter, anyway?!?" Totosai stomped his foot petulantly and waited for the taiyoukai's response.  
  
Sesshoumaru's thoughts were in an uproar. Kill her or keep her? He WAS furious with himself that he had not paused to consider the full scope of his actions all those years ago. How could he be reduced to this? He drew the Tenseiga to regard the sword with a look of deep turmoil. Could he actually cut Rin down like some hated enemy? He cast a quick glance back to Totosai.  
  
The old demon's smile was far too sweet and innocent, and Sesshoumaru had the sinking feeling that he was about to be decimated by some final, unforeseen blow.  
  
"Oh, ohhh!" Totosai suddenly chimed out, clapping his gnarled hands together and hopping about the fire excitedly. "Say, I've just thought of a THIRD option! As her FORMER guardian, I invite you to help me find a suitable DEMON to be her mate!" he cackled. "That way she'd be cared for by something with enough strength to keep her safe, and the bond of your power would remain secure and secret!"  
  
The taiyoukai rounded on him with a look of intense abhorrence. He suddenly found he wasn't concerned about his 'stolen' power or his lofty image! How dare this crazy old creature suggest they pawn Rin off to slake the lust of some other pitiful youkai in exchange for --- he couldn't even think about it!  
  
Totosai continued to ignore Sesshoumaru, paying no heed to the sizzle of youki in the air and his expression of profound disgust.  
  
"Rin's got plenty of suitors these days!" he divulged with a sly wink. "You wouldn't believe how much business I've had since that pretty young thing came to stay with me! You should see how they fawn over her! The gifts! The compliments and flowing praise --- it never ends!"  
  
Sesshoumaru reeled as if he'd been struck with the damn Kaze no Kizu. "NANDATO?" he gritted. "Who dares?"  
  
He suddenly came to realize the thought of another youkai bedding her was even MORE distasteful than imagining her with a lowly human. He would never leave her to the heat or carnal hunger of another DEMON.  
  
All of his doubts and angst and pride came down to this one thought --- Rin was his! He could keep her! The realization filled him with an equal mixture of horror, shock, trepidation, and strange delight. In his confusing, clamoring build of youki and unfamiliar emotion, he dimly became aware that scarlet was beginning to creep before his vision again.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
Rin brought Momo down on the edge of a rocky precipice. The beast trembled, his loyalty to his master somewhat dampened by his instinctive fear. The girl dismounted and left the shaking bull on a lower shelf to continue on the narrow trail to the cavern on foot. She could see the foundry from here. There was the telling scorch of acid across the snow caps. Rin could smell those sharp, burning fumes again, and stared down at how the very rock of the mountain was melted. She KNEW the fearsome creature that did this, even without seeing those monstrous paw prints in the snow.  
  
Sesshoumaru-sama was here. His anger and hate had apparently not cooled. She crept to the edge of the cliff, staring down into the darkness of a deep crevasse.  
  
She was distracted by some loose gravel that had come dislodged and followed its progress as it echoed down the cliff face. Inuyasha's words suddenly hung heavy and weighed on her heart and mind. 'Tell me, will you still feel such 'loyalty' and 'devotion' when he turns on you like an animal and claims your life!?'  
  
All her life, she had kept out her hope, even in times of despair. She had always tried to make the best of everything, to see the good in any creature. She smiled at a quick thought and mental image of Jaken.  
  
But she could find no reason to hope anymore.  
  
To throw herself from this high point would be to deny Sesshoumaru his own power. Didn't Totosai say that the only way to reclaim it would be to kill her with the Tenseiga? Should she die another way, it would be lost to him forever. She wouldn't have to face him, wouldn't have to look in his eyes as he collected what was rightfully his. She took another step closer to the edge, watching blankly as a few more stones broke loose to disappear into the nothingness below. She thought of the time she had lost her footing and fallen while trying to obtain the Sensou no Mi to save Jaken after he'd been poisoned by the Saimyousho. Sesshoumaru-sama had arrived to save her at the last moment, streaking out of thin air to capture her in his arms.  
  
There was no one to prevent her fall now --- no one would ever even know—  
  
She leapt away from the rim with a choked sob. No – she couldn't do it. Just as she claimed to the hanyou, she would be faithful to him always --- even at the end. If not for Sesshoumaru her bones would still be rotting under the leaves in some forgotten corner of some far away, nameless forest. No matter how selfish his reasons, he HAD given her back her life.  
  
She peered down into the seemingly endless darkness one last time, before turning to continue up to the forge. She would accept whatever fate Sesshoumaru had planned for her.  
  
She turned and walked somberly into the cave, drawing a shaky breath at the appalling sight before her ---  
  
Sesshoumaru stood wreathed in the shadows, growling with unmistakable threat. His eyes were steadily bleeding to crimson and the Tenseiga was drawn and held at the ready. She reached out blindly to support herself on the wall --- this was it. She gathered her courage and stepped forward bravely. She dropped her naginata, flinching as the metal clattered on the bare stone floor. The weapon was useless now anyway ---  
  
Both the taiyoukai and the old demon jumped at the clamor and turned in surprise.  
  
"Master?" she called out mournfully.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*  
  
nanda – more powerful/more masculine form of "what?"  
  
nandato – "what did you say?"  
  
Ookami – wolf  
  
Sensou no Mi – the plant that Rin obtained to save Jaken when he was stung by the saimyosho --- filler episode but somewhat cute!  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ 


	14. Chapter 13

ANYWAY, AS USUAL, TYPOS AND GENERAL SAPPINESS ABOUND. THE STORY --- AND EVEN THE SEQUEL --- IS TOTALLY OUTLINED and THE NEXT CHAPTER IS INTERESTING TO SAY THE LEAST.

Chapter 13: Sesshoumaru-sama, Okaeri Wo

Sesshoumaru froze at that small, tremulous query. He recognized the soft voice, even as he registered the rattle of cold steel on the stone floor and her gentle scent on the breeze.

_Rin_.

He turned slowly, not sure if he was really prepared to gaze upon her yet. At first, all he could see was her silhouette haloed against the bright sunlight behind her. But as she continued to creep softly down into the cavern, gliding her hands against the rock wall for support, his heart turned. There was the same stubborn courage, the same audacious defiance, but she looked so different now.

She seemed so sad --- her entire expression and posture utterly mournful and cheerless.

Rin's hazel eyes were full of fear and mistrust, and she would not return his gaze. How could he ever have thought, even for one small moment, that he wanted to see her like this? How could he have ever believed that he wanted to see her cower before him in terror?

As she tread closer, moving deeper into the forge, only one phrase echoed over and over in Rin's mind: _Please, let it be over quickly_. The young woman came to a dutiful stop within striking range the Tenseiga. She could not look at Sesshoumaru's face, however, her eyes seemingly transfixed and mesmerized by the gleaming blade.

She watched in numb disbelief as the great sword was slowly lowered and re-sheathed. Rin couldn't understand --- all thoughts were dulled by doubt and suspicion. She looked up questioningly, her immense confusion finally making her brave enough to search his face for answers to her fate. But Lord Sesshoumaru had already turned away.

"I will do as you advise, old man," he stated flatly. "This girl will come with me."

Rin was stunned. _What? Sesshoumaru-sama was going to take her back? Why?_ This was not what she had been expecting at all. The taiyoukai did not even seem to acknowledge her in the least as he addressed Totosai with finality. "Tell her to gather her belongings and make ready to travel --- immediately."

Rin's initial shock and relief faded, and she flushed in indignation. Her fate was being decided again as if she wasn't even present --- as if she didn't even matter!

_But how she had desired this! She had wanted it for so long! How many hours had she spent in the darkness crying herself back to sleep, wishing that her life now was nothing more than a bad dream as well? How many times had she silently prayed and begged to any strange god she could remember that he would suddenly return for her?! But now ----_

Her small hands curled into tight fists and something snapped deep inside her. She thought of the terrifying night he came to claim his new armor, the way he'd callously threatened and harmed the miko, and, most of all, the manner in which he'd just cast HER aside to begin with! Before she could stop herself, she threw back her head and shrieked, "No!"

Totosai snapped around, his eyes bulging from their sockets even more than usual. He waved his arms wildly in obvious warning for her to behave herself and be silent.

"No!" Rin continued, "I won't be quiet! I WON'T GO BACK TO BEING HIS --- HIS ---" She choked and sputtered, not caring how insane she appeared, not caring if this tirade cost her life. "I WON'T RETURN TO BEING NOTHING MORE THAN HIS PET!"

The old sword-smith moaned and slapped a leathery hand to his wrinkled brow in dismay. He had taken a huge gamble in explaining the full scope of Tenseiga's powers to Sesshoumaru, and his blind show of faith and trust had been repaid admirably --- SO FAR. But he wasn't sure how much further the powerful demon would allow himself to be pushed! He knew the ruthless taiyoukai was already feeling trapped and helpless, and testing the measure of his patience was not the most prudent decision at the moment. Surely, HE would not tolerate THIS outburst and insubordination from his former ward.

Sesshoumaru looked absolutely appalled and aghast. In a heartbeat, he had vanished from the sword-smith's side only to rematerialize before the girl. Totosai cringed --- this might get awfully messy!

Rin's continuing fit of temper was cut short with a squeak of surprise as Sesshoumaru grabbed her chin roughly. His long fingers pressed against her small jaw, and she whimpered as he forced her head up to finally meet his piercing gaze. "YOU --- you NEVER were my --- 'pet'," he hissed indignantly, as if the word were just as distasteful to his own ears as it was to hers. He released her as suddenly as he'd seized her, and moved to stand by the entrance of the cavern.

"Iku zo," he stated imperiously. '_We're leaving.'_

The young woman slumped to the floor with a gasp. Those were the same words he'd always stated her whole life whenever he meant for ALL OF THEM to depart together.

He noted her dazed look from the corner of his eye. "Gather your belongings, Rin," he repeated in a softer, though no less commanding tone.

Rin stared back in wonder. His full profile was hidden by the downy fluff of his tail and she could not read his expression in return. Her eyes blinked rapidly in bafflement and she rubbed her slightly aching jaw.

_He didn't look upon her as merely a pet?! _Never in her life had Sesshoumaru-sama ANSWERED any of her more meaningful, probing questions! _Was his fierce reply only in her imagination? Did he just say what she thought he said? _

Without another word of protest, Rin numbly moved to comply with her master's demands.

Sesshoumaru peeked back over his shoulder again, his apprehension somewhat fading as soon as he saw her yield and obey. His eyes followed her motions with an equal mix of relief and dread. For the slightest of moments, he had actually been afraid. Not afraid that she might refuse him; after all, it didn't matter if she tried to rebuff his order. Despite his shock at her initial outburst, he would have TAKEN her anyway, by force if necessary ---

There was simply too much at risk now.

Completely aside from whatever strange emotion was currently clamoring within his chest, he still had that damned 'tie' to his power to consider! If she WAS truly linked to him in some bizarre way, he would not allow HER to go wandering around the countryside unprotected with HIS youki --- at least, not until he had a better understanding of how this all worked. The girl simply had NO choice in the matter.

There were so many disquieting thoughts raging through his mind to vex him at the present moment. The most troubling notion was that perhaps she might challenge him further by insisting upon an explanation of what she REALLY meant to him. What if she asked him here and now to define her TRUE role in his life? He wasn't sure if he could respond to such a question --- not being entirely certain of the answer himself.

The girl, however, very clearly didn't seem to be pondering over such deep or profound thoughts. _Nor_ _did she seem to be gathering much of anything_. Sesshoumaru frowned, belatedly realizing that the girl already seemed to be carrying some sort of pack and was dressed for travel. Where the hell had she been?

He watched impassively as she moved to throw her arms around Totosai and he could smell the telling scent of falling tears.

"I don't know what to say, Ojii-sama," she whispered simply. "I just want to thank you for everything."

"It's all right, get going --- he's not gonna wait! You KNOW all too well what a temper this one has!" he whispered back, as Sesshoumaru continued to scowl. "Remember, you're always welcome here, young lady."

Rin pulled Totosai into a tight, final hug of farewell and together they walked into the bright sunlight behind the taiyoukai.

Sesshoumaru watched the emotional display of their parting with curiosity and --- and something else._ Jealousy again_, he supposed with chagrin. He turned away in confusion and reached down to pick up the well-designed, light naginata Rin had dropped to the floor when she had first entered the cave. He was impressed that she should have the strength and willpower to defeat the jyaki in the fang that formed the blade. _Impressed --- and somehow not surprised._

He was still so puzzled --- the taiyoukai didn't know what his full intentions were, but after seeing the girl again after all these tense, lonely months, he knew he simply didn't want to be without her presence for another moment. He didn't have to make a decision regarding her ultimate fate right now, he reasoned. The demon lord simply resolved to return to his home in the west again, and debate his options thoroughly.

Staring appraisingly at Rin's slight form, he waited for her to close the distance between them. The young woman before him now was essentially a stranger --- nothing of the bright, laughing child he had known seemed to remain.

Though he hardly would have thought it possible for her to do so, Rin seemed to have lost weight. Her complexion was now far too pale and wan, and he angrily noted a few fresh bruises marring her throat and wrists --- what had happened?

It seemed the girl's eyes were the most dramatically changed thing about her--- they now appeared as impossibly ancient and tired as old Bokuseno's. All and all, it looked almost as if she could fall over and sleep for one hundred years. After all these day of racing across the countryside in fury and agitation, he suddenly imagined himself to be just as haggard and worn. He sighed. It would be best to travel as swiftly as possible. But to do that, he would have to --- have to ---

The taiyoukai shifted his weight uncomfortably.

Rin watched Sesshoumaru, clearly baffled by his halting, seemingly un-purposeful actions. He was just standing there, as if waiting for something. She kept moving forward when he did, only to stop abruptly when he paused. When was he going to move on so she could simply trot along in his footsteps? Isn't that the way it always worked in the past?

"Ahem," Totosai coughed. Rin turned back to the old youkai, her present bewilderment stamped clearly all over her face. "I think he means for you to go TO him," the sword-smith whispered perceptively. "I think he means to CARRY you!"

If possible, Rin appeared to look even MORE terrified than when she first entered the forge. She caught Sesshoumaru's eyes for a split-second as he regarded her critically. His eyebrows rose expectantly to disappear under the stark fringe of his heavy white bangs and he threw her an almost quizzical look.

"Oh," she breathed in understanding. She squared her shoulders and marched up to her master, trying to avoid his sharp gaze again. It wasn't hard to do --- he was so much taller than her! The crown of her head barely reached the crest of his armor!

Without a word, Sesshoumaru handed her back her weapon, and Rin blushed fiercely as his large hand quickly brushed against the back of hers. She didn't have much time to dwell on the strange feeling that the one simple touch evoked. Two seconds later, he had hauled her up tightly against him, his right arm circling securely around her shoulders, while the left moved low on her waist.

It was such a shock to be SO close to him. She was suddenly aware that the only other times he'd ever held her were when she was very young and, of course, that terrible evening when he'd originally abandoned her. And naturally, on THAT particular night she hadn't been able to focus on much of anything, save her fear and pain.

Rin swallowed hard and tried to make her heart stop racing. She bit her lip to distract herself, as she fleetingly wished that Sesshoumaru-sama's fine, long hair was free so she could finally feel the texture against her skin. She curled her arms around herself protectively and squeezed the naginata till her knuckles went white, hoping he couldn't sense her mortification.

She stared down in complete fascination as that strange fluffy thing seemed to divide and lengthen to lift them from the ground. They were smoothly swept into the air and began to glide down the mountain at an astonishingly rapid pace. She cast a quick look behind her to wave goodbye to Totosai one last time, and was amazed at how both Lord Sesshoumaru's dark attire AND her kimono seemed to flow out for yards upon yards behind them in a blurry mist. _Gods, youkai powers were truly incredible! How could he do this so effortlessly?! _She felt weightless and giddy, and it seemed as though all time was stopped; it was as if there was no air around her, but yet she could still breathe. This was even more exhilarating than streaking across the sky with Aun. Rin smiled slightly in spite of her fears.

The ground, merely meters below them, seemed to race by in nothing more than hazy blocks of muted color. They traveled swiftly through autumn forests filled with dense groves of tall bamboo, pine and cypress. It was staggering how easily he seemed to avoid all obstacles in his path with such subtle and restrained movements --- his every action so flowing, dexterous and calculated.

It ended all too soon. Shadows lengthened and the sun fell, though Rin guessed that they still had quite a distance yet to travel. Their pace slowed gradually, and Sesshoumaru veered towards a rocky outcropping. They drifted easily over a dry plain, and Rin gasped in recognition. This was the awful place where they had faced Naraku all those months ago! She suddenly felt deathly afraid again. Perhaps this was all some sort of twisted game or plot and he really DID intend to do her harm!

Sesshoumaru looked down, nonplussed. He could feel Rin tense at his side and he sensed the abrupt, severe change in her heart rate. His arms clenched around her for the slightest of moments as he continued to thoroughly scout for a suitable place to make camp. The taiyoukai had intended the securer hold to be somewhat reassuring, but it did not seem to bolster the girl in the slightest --- in fact, his tightened grip seemed to have the dramatically opposite effect. Now she was actually trying to resist, struggling against him in earnest! _Now what_?

The minute she felt Sesshoumaru's hold slacken again, Rin pressed her small palms firmly against the polished surface of his armor to push herself away from him. She shrugged free of the taiyoukai's taut grip and leapt from his side, stumbling to her knees from the sudden transition in speed. She scrambled through the loose stones as if he was about to attack her, and tucked her body into a rigid ball at the base of a large boulder.

Sesshoumaru looked on in sadness. He was suddenly reminded of how he had made Rin cower before his true form. With a deepening sense of remorse, he realized HE had brought this upon himself and had no one else to blame. His transformation and actions had doubtlessly given a new focus and face to the girl's nightmares, and he bitterly supposed her behavior now was only to be expected. The taiyoukai backed away slowly and stood watching her from the opposite side of the small gully. If only Jaken and Aun were here! Maybe their presences could have soothed her or put her mind at ease.

At the moment, he didn't know what he wanted, he wasn't sure what to do next --- all he knew was that he COULDN'T stand those usually kind and gentle eyes filled with such mistrust and apprehension. He turned from her miserable, huddled figure to glance up at the sky. The night was clear and cloudless, and the stars were twinkling peacefully --- the same as when he'd sent her away. The taiyoukai sighed ruefully.

He continued to steal tiny furtive glances back at the girl out of the corner of his eye. She was shivering, and not just from fear, he suddenly realized with concern. A strong breeze ruffled his long hair and the fur of his tail, and he was suddenly aware of just how cold the night had really become.

He supposed he should build a fire for her benefit. With a sour look, he noted there was woefully little tinder in this washed-out ravine. His grim expression continued to deepen into a full-out scowl as he realized would have to travel a fair distance to seek some out.

But after all the energy, thought, effort and anger he'd put into locating and collecting Rin, he couldn't just leave her in unfamiliar territory, no matter how short the duration of his absence. He could smell plenty of other youkai lurking within range and he couldn't imagine more enticing, tantalizing prey than her at the moment.

He cast another cautious look over Rin's form, utterly surprised to find her hazel eyes had drifted closed. In the end, it would seem that exhaustion had apparently won out over her great fear. His years of observing her silently in the dark confirmed she'd fallen fast asleep now --- he listened to the low sound of her heartbeat and watched her chest rise and fall in deep, even breaths. "Natsukashii," Sesshoumaru whispered with relief. Her heart had been pounding so amazingly fast when he'd held her close, he'd been afraid it would shatter or burst through her chest!

After all his cruelty and these months of separation, he couldn't be sure where her feelings lay anymore. Didn't Rin's defensive and self-protective actions just mere moments ago prove that she had obviously lost some of her unwavering faith and trust in him? Did she still care for him AT ALL, he wondered?

Sesshoumaru approached the girl stealthily, watching intently for any signs that she might suddenly awaken. _Such a strange little creature_, he mused.

He knelt slowly, peering down curiously to scrutinize her slumbering form. In her sleep, Rin's face had finally lost that horrible wary look, and he marveled at the shadows and the otherworldly white hue that the moon's light cast upon her. He reached out tentatively to trace the contours of her face, extremely mindful about the sharp tips of his claws. With the same cautious, feather-light touch, he casually brushed her long, unruly bangs off her forehead, breathing in the sweet scent of her sable hair. His eyes narrowed --- besides her gentle fragrance, he could also detect the foul odors of a sickening array of strange humans AND his damn half-brother as well. He focused angrily on an ugly bruise darkening her temple and continued to gingerly sweep her curls away from her neck, frowning at a few other contusions on her throat. He could smell blood and reached down to grab her small hand in his own, momentarily distracted by the dramatic difference in size. Her knuckles were raw, the thin skin scraped and torn. It was obvious that, like him, she had journeyed to the hanyou's village within the past few hours as well, and --- and it appeared those filthy vermin had ---

They had harmed her.

He growled, suddenly wishing he had given Inuyasha a more thorough and violent beating.

Another small tremor suddenly coursed through the girl's body. His growl died in his throat and he quickly released her tiny hand, feeling slightly self-conscious. There could be no doubt this time that her trembling was strictly in response to the brisk night air.

The taiyoukai watched as Rin continued to slumber on in spite of the chill and her obvious discomfort. The girl curled in on herself even further and randomly muttered a few nonsense phrases he couldn't quite make out.

Sesshoumaru settled beside the young woman, leaning his back on the large rock to stretch his tired legs comfortably out before him. He scowled for a few moments in indecision, completely unsure of just how to act.

Finally --- gently, slowly --- so as not to wake her, he reached down and pulled Rin into his lap with a sigh. He angled her body across the relatively un-armored, sword-arm side of his o-yorai, and settled his tail to encircle both of them for warmth. After all, this was truly the only logical, practical thing to do, he rationalized.

_This was merely to protect her from the elements and to keep her from falling ill --- holding her so close meant nothing_, he chanted over and over in his mind, even as his hand automatically moved to tenderly stroke her soft cheek again and again.

Rin shifted as the first rays of sunlight splashed upon her face. She felt strange: so warm and comfortable, like she was still half-caught in a pleasant dream. Her back was pressed against something hard and unyielding, while her arms and chest were soothed and cosseted by something impossibly soft. She cracked a bleary eye and yawned. Something soft, warm and --- white?

Rin's eyes snapped open in full alarm and her cheeks flared immediately with heat. She gasped in surprise and tilted her chin upwards, staring right into Sesshoumaru-sama's amber eyes. His current look was blank, inscrutable and utterly impossible to read --- he simply blinked back down at her.

The girl blushed fretfully, pulling her koromo more tightly around herself in a perfunctory show of modesty and deep-rooted confusion. Sensing her intense distress and extreme embarrassment, Sesshoumaru released her at once, rolling to his feet and stepping back all in one poised, fluid motion.

Rin reached up reflexively to sleek down her sleep-tousled hair, and turned to study her present surroundings, eyes darting wildly over the barren gully and every feature of the desolate terrain --- anything to keep from looking at HIM.

Sesshoumaru glowered at her reaction. All of his initial fears from last night were proving painfully true --- he WOULD have to work to earn back her trust now; Rin seemed so suspicious and frightened of him. Sesshoumaru looked over to where she stood trembling. It was time to face reality --- he had been absolutely miserable without her. Though they had only just reunited, the taiyoukai found he could not take much more of her cagey behavior. As Totosai had said, he could KEEP the girl, apparently for a very, very, very, VERY long time --- oddly enough, he suddenly realized that he found that prospect strangely soothing and delightful.

He cast another sly glance at Rin. What should he do now? Did he have to ---- apologize? He stiffened. What did HE have to apologize for anyway? This was all HER fault to begin with! After all, the incongruity and irony of his campsite location had not been lost on him either. If only she'd listened to him and not followed him onto THIS damn battle-field in the first place none of this would have happened!

Sesshoumaru reigned in his temper almost as quickly as he began to lose it. After all, did he really expect Rin to obey him in ALL things? No, he decided crossly, THAT was Jaken's position and duty. Rin was --- Rin was --- he swallowed. What?

Totosai had implied she was his friend. With a start, he realized the old demon was right. At the beginning, she HAD been a novelty, and he quietly enjoyed observing her mannerisms and reactions. But, over time, she had become something other than mere entertainment. She WAS his friend --- or at least the closest thing he'd had to one his whole long life. Indeed, she was more than that --- she was his solace and loyal support. Somehow she had made herself an integral part of his life, even despite all his best efforts to fight that fact --- despite all his attempts to ignore her and shut her out. She stood behind him through all manner of adversity with constant cheer and never a complaint. She had shouldered all of his dark moods and threatening silences with nothing more than that ever-present, serene smile.

But could he REALLY apologize to her? He had never begged forgiveness of anyone --- not even when he was a small child!

He abruptly realized with annoyance that Totosai was right about another fact --- they did share the same pain and, without even being aware of it, they had somehow eased the burden of one another's loneliness. SHE was the only creature who NEEDED him, who depended on him. And SHE was the only creature he'd warmed up to in return. _Well_, he recognized suddenly with a pained frown, he hadn't 'warmed-up' that much!

But what was the point?! He had never been one for idle chatter and over-emotional fawning. After all, the girl had SHARED every one of his days --- why then should they rattle on and reminisce about what they'd just experienced TOGETHER? It was a decidedly boring, redundant, sentimental HUMAN trait to babble and pour over memories for endless hours. Why should HE reduce himself to that?

Sesshoumaru threw another fleeting look at Rin's pale visage, and she blanched noticeably under his momentary attention.

_Because, _he realized with another sharp stab of guilt_, it would have brought her SOME measure of happiness._ He remembered how the mirth and gaiety would vanish from her eyes each and every time he'd cast off one of her questions or ignored her little attempts at conversation.

His amber eyes brightened hopefully as he suddenly settled on a course of action. Perhaps THAT was all he needed to do now! Maybe he wouldn't have to lower his dignity by offering an apology --- maybe instead of being reduced to saying that horrible, degrading, groveling word, he could show Rin his feelings with his actions just like he always did.

Whatever the case, he recognized SOMETHING needed to be done to repair the damage and end this growing tension between them. The girl's pulse had gone back to pounding far too rapidly and a fine sheen of sweat was starting to bead on her brow, as she eyed him in growing wariness from the other side of the small ravine.

He stepped towards her and she backpedaled in response, beginning to climb slowly up the steep slope. His brows furrowed in frustration. When she looked at him now, perhaps all she saw was his other, fully-transformed self. Rin turned and fidgeted awkwardly, wringing the embroidered hem of her sleeve between her fingers as she scrambled across the rocks. He watched as she crept past a particularly ghastly corpse of a demon that had lost its life on this battlefield all those months ago. The girl merely wrinkled her nose down at the rotting creature, but proceeded on unafraid and undeterred, seemingly less disgusted by the stinking, bloated carcass than of HIM at the present moment. Sesshoumaru let out an exasperated groan and dropped to sink cross-legged down to the ground again.

Rin spun around and gasped, completely unaccustomed to looking down upon him. In order to make the situation feel more normal, she quickly dropped to her knees and crouched among the stones as well. Why had Sesshoumaru-sama stopped?

The taiyoukai looked up hopefully when he heard her settle, and then grimaced when he saw she was still choosing to maintain a dramatically fair distance from his side. He waited. Maybe she'd make this easy for him by asking one of her friendly little questions ---

But there was nothing. Just long, dragging moments of tense, increasingly uncomfortable SILENCE.

Of course this wasn't going to work, Sesshoumaru realized sullenly. After all, Rin hadn't tried to engage him in REAL conversation for quite some time. He cursed himself for his own callous thoughtlessness and stupidity. Now, when he was inviting her simple chatter and friendly dialogue, she was too jaded, too frightened and too cynical to ask anything. He felt like a fool --- he was going to have to swallow his pride to reach out to her.

"This Sessh ---" he began forcefully, stopping as she turned her head up to face him. Her long eyelashes fluttered rapidly in surprise and he faltered under this first direct look into her eyes in the clear light of day. His breath caught --- all those strange sienna highlights glowing within those large brown irises; those full pink lips; those angled cheekbones; and that perfect, heart-shaped face.

How could he have forgotten how beautiful she had become?

He lowered his eyes, his gaze suddenly coming to focus again on the dark, sinister marks presently marring her pale throat and wrists.

"Where --- where did you get those bruises?" he finished lamely, and his speech died again as the full irony and paradox of the situation tore at something in his chest.

Rin reacted to his deep voice and painfully familiar query with a startled jolt, her heart pounding erratically at the poignant nature of those simple words. That was the first question he had asked her all those long years ago when he lay wounded in the forest.

She looked down at her ragged, scraped knuckles before haltingly replying, "I suppose you already know that I went to try to visit the miko's village yesterday, master," she supplied deferentially. "The other humans there were not very --- kind --- to me."

He nodded slowly, releasing some of his rigid posture in reaction to the sweet tone of that lilting, all too familiar voice. "This Sesshoumaru was wounded at that miserable place as well," he stated quietly in return, gesturing at a tattered slash in his haori with annoyance.

"Inuyasha and that boy, the demon slayer --- the one who is so ---" his words grated resentfully, "the one who is so --- fond of you --- were actually able to draw this Sessh --- my blood."

Nani? Rin's jaw dropped. Her brief reply a moment before had been the short, dutiful, perfunctory response he always expected from her. But HE never commented any further upon her words! Plus, he had just mentioned that he had been wounded --- he was actually admitting to some form of 'weakness'?! This was not like her master at all. Perhaps Sesshoumaru-sama had been injured MORE gravely than he realized. At the moment, she didn't even have the ability to worry about Kohaku-kun or his safety. She presently couldn't really think at all --- this wasn't the way it worked!

Rin stared at the taiyoukai with growing alarm, mystification, and amazement --- her master was TALKING to her!? The great demon seemed so uncomfortable, and his eyes were beseeching and restless. Could he really be inviting her to speak back AGAIN?

Sesshoumaru watched as the girl plucked a few bits of dead, scraggly grass from the rocky ground, mostly, it seemed, just to give her twitching fingers something to do in her agitation and nervousness. He waited anxiously for her next comment.

"Are you in any pain, my lord?" she inquired with genuine concern.

The taiyoukai swallowed hard at that tender, caring question. _Yes_, he answered in his mind. But not because of the hanyou or the boy or the ridiculous, already nearly healed injuries. _This Sesshoumaru is in pain because you --- you ---_

He stared acrimoniously at his claws, unable to even finish the disturbing sentiment in his own thoughts.

Rin pondered what to do next. Sesshoumaru had fallen strangely silent again but had leaned forward and was nodding expectantly at her. Was he trying to coax her into talking once more? She knew exactly what she needed to ask --- it might ruin this odd and tentative exchange, but she might never get the chance to question him again.

"Why?" she whispered emphatically. "Why did you leave me?"

Though her words were determined, her air seemed slightly hesitant, almost as if she were half afraid he would drag her back to Totosai's mountain and abandon her again.

Sesshoumaru's expression darkened and his shoulders slumped uncharacteristically. He supposed this had to happen now.

"I do not know," he responded truthfully. "But since you have been gone, I --- have not ---"

_I have not been myself_, he finished in his mind, still unable to give voice to such humiliating words out loud.

Rin nodded slowly, intrigued by the unspoken conclusion of that statement and its somber tone, while Sesshoumaru braced himself for those next unavoidable and profound questions. Now that they were alone she would most certainly ask about the future, and what her new role would be in it. Or worse, perhaps she would ask about the past, and if he regretted giving her back her life with Tenseiga?

His eyes narrowed in consternation as she opened her mouth to speak. Perhaps this hadn't been the best idea after all. He was only inviting trouble; at any second she would ask him one of those inevitable questions --- there was such an endless array for her to choose from.

But the girl merely smiled back at him for the first time, just as she'd done all those long years ago. Her bright expression now made her appear older and wiser than her short years, and her next simple question utterly surprised him to the core.

"How are Jaken and Aun?" she asked, her gaze drifting to critically examine the blade of her naginata.

Sesshoumaru felt a warm rush of relief --- it appeared Rin was just as anxious and reluctant to ask such deep, weighty questions as he was resistant to answering them. He felt an unfamiliar swell of gratitude and empathy. After all, he knew the girl was no fool --- she was intentionally choosing subjects they could deal with now.

With another sting in the vicinity of his chest, he realized she KNEW him only too well. Somehow, she could sense his apprehension as surely as he could sense hers and, as ever, she was sacrificing her own emotional security and pride so he could keep his. She was pushing her own worries aside to give him his space --- just like she always did.

"I am unsure," he answered unhurriedly, "This Sesshoumaru ceased traveling with them not long after you and I --- "

The taiyoukai frowned and struggled to come up with the proper word. "Since you and I --- parted," he whispered.

Rin felt her eyes burn and her vision blur at the carefully chosen words. She struggled to get her building tears back under control; an overly emotional display would doubtlessly sicken and repulse him right now.

Sesshoumaru directed another quick glance at Rin, horrified that she suddenly seemed ready to weep. Damn – he couldn't even hazard to guess what she would do next. She still appeared so guarded and had averted her eyes with her hand, seemingly trying to pass off her tears as a response to the glare of the morning sun.

He was plagued with sudden doubt --- what if she rejected him? What if she hated him? He had already resolved that her feelings would not influence his decision to take her back. She would return to Western Lands no matter how ferocious her protests, but --- but her resentment and animosity would HURT.

He rose to his feet quickly, convinced that his words and actions were doing little to put her mind at ease. When Rin looked up, he became sharply conscious of the fact that time had taught her to imitate his bland mask all too well. The pace of her emotional reactions, or lack thereof, was staggering --- how did his brother handle these human women?

"Tatte," he stated, irked at the loathsome thought that Inuyasha might be better than him at something. "We should be home by nightfall." He prepared himself for possible mutiny or a likely scuffle.

But mutiny, it appeared, was not on her mind.

"Home," Rin echoed somewhat dreamily, dropping her cool façade to dab at her eyes with her sleeve one last time. Despite the strangeness of Sesshoumaru's friendly overtures and her doubts for what lay ahead, she truly longed to see Aun and Jaken again. She wished to listen to the ocean, to wander through the stately halls of the compound, to collapse in her OWN bed. Eager to begin the day's travel, she squinted up at the rising sun again, and turned automatically in the opposite direction.

As she pattered decidedly westward, Sesshoumaru followed in her path curiously. He could still sense her nervousness, but her intense fear seemed to have subsided slightly. How did this happen? He watched her clamber a few more steps away, noting the more assured, confident sway of her gait. There was a strange click on the loose rocks and he glanced down in surprise at her little tabi socks and geta. He had never seen her in shoes before --- he supposed she'd have to have them to live on that desolate mountain with all that snow! He wasn't used to her making such a racket when she moved. With an inward laugh he realized SHE wasn't used to it either, and was presently scowling down at her own toes at nearly every loud clip on the gravel. "Mou, kono baka na mono," she pouted, leaning on another large boulder to pull the offending things from her feet.

With a small smile, Rin next moved to a tiny trickle of cold water flowing down from the jagged rocks above. She bent to fill a small bamboo container at her waist to sustain her for the rest of the journey. She paused to scoop some of the clear water into her cupped hands and vigorously scrubbed her face and neck, and refreshed her mouth. The girl watched in surprise as Sesshoumaru came to her side and did the same. Rin blinked in shock --- he'd never groomed himself before her!

He caught her incredulous expression with a bored look and she turned away in embarrassment. But the young woman did not look aside quickly enough. The taiyoukai noticed the small instant in which her eyes flicked upward to take another appraising look at his long hair.

"Do you not like it?" he asked suddenly, pushing the trailing ponytail back over his shoulder and out of the cold water.

Rin blushed, still quite uncomfortable with suddenly being able to speak so casually with him, especially about such a ridiculously inane subject. She nearly burst out laughing at his strangely wounded expression and obvious display of male vanity.

"I don't know," she stammered. "It's just so different and I am --- not used to it, my lord. You don't look like yourself." She felt herself growing more embarrassed by the minute. "I mean," she muttered quickly, "it makes you look like someone --- someone else."

He did not smile, but she saw an unfamiliar, easy glow creep into his already-striking amber eyes.

"You would probably like the person they say it makes this Sesshoumaru look like," he countered smoothly, leaping up into the rocks above to scout ahead.

Rin nodded in understanding and tracked his progress absently, somewhat dazed to hear the obvious reference to his great Father. She found herself pleasantly flustered that he was so offhandedly revealing some sort of information about his family and past.

Sesshoumaru turned to watch her scramble athletically up the jagged rocks behind him with a strange feeling of pride. As she reached the small summit, he casually extended a hand to help her crest the last part of the steep slope, noting the pretty rose-colored blush fanning out across her cheekbones.

Timidly, she reached back to accept his aid. Her small hand trembled, but her eyes were as bright as they were when she bravely stood in the shadows as he challenged Naraku.

As his fingers laced with the girl's, Sesshoumaru suddenly found himself pondering Chichiue's personality a bit more thoroughly. A wonderfully strange notion invaded his conscience: _And he would most definitely like you too, Rin_, he thought. That rather poignant statement and realization played over in his mind, but he still found he could not give voice to such tender, affectionate and wholly frightening words.

He pulled her steadily to his side, releasing her hand to loop his arms securely about her waist, fully prepared to carry her again. He scanned the distance for any possible threats and then gasped in shock and nearly dropped the girl. Rin had quite unexpectedly reached up past the imposing spikes on his armor to wrap her delicate arms about his neck and shoulders. One small hand now rested lightly against the rich fabric of his haori, while the other threaded gently into the soft hair at his nape.

"I still am not used to it, Sesshoumaru-sama," she murmured, not exactly sure what she was referring to anymore.

"Nor am I," he answered, resting his cheek atop her raven hair as he lifted into the wind.

Iku zo: "We're leaving"

Natsukashii: more of a concept word that encompasses feelings of nostalgia, familiarity, and having missed or longed for something

Mou, kono baka na mono: "Geez, these stupid things"

Tatte: "Stand up"


	15. Chapter 14

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Chapter 14: Saikai  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The remainder of the journey to the western lands was relatively uneventful, and Rin continued to will her heart to stop thundering as they glided the entire long distance in uneasy, awkward silence.  
  
By mid-afternoon, the girl noticed the grasses were becoming longer and the trees were becoming more twisted and stunted. As they neared the coast, she could smell the salt and the spray, and she inhaled deeply, breathing in great mouthfuls of crisp ocean air. Soon afterward, she could hear the cries of the gulls and kittiwakes as the noisy, squabbling sea-birds wheeled and dove in the strong wind currents.  
  
They crested a rolling dune, and Rin got her first glimpse of the shiro she never thought she'd see again. Even before Lord Sesshoumaru had originally left her with Inuyasha, she hadn't been back here in many long months --- eight all together, she suddenly realized in surprise.  
  
As they neared the magnificent compound, Rin wriggled free from Sesshoumaru's grasp yet again and dropped lithely to the ground. She ran excitedly the rest of the way to the fortified wall, just like she always had since she was a little girl.  
  
She had barely come to a stop before the massive iron gate when it swung open, and she was knocked forcibly to the ground by a rather overenthusiastic Aun. The creature pinned the giggling, temporarily hapless girl in the sand and sniffed her all over, as if trying to confirm it was really her. Both massive heads tried to twist and butt the other out of the way to get a better look.  
  
Aun's zealous greeting was interrupted by loud, sycophantic squawking. "Jaken-sama!" Rin cried, recognizing that scratchy pitch in an instant. The girl crawled up to her knees and wrapped the very stunned little youkai in a fierce hug.  
  
Sesshoumaru approached slowly and looked down his nose in wonder at this bizarre sight before him: his often-feuding companions were now embracing one another in a tight, crushing clinch. He could smell tears again --- and with a look of shock he realized NOT all of them were Rin's. He stared at Jaken incredulously.  
  
It appeared his servant had not fared well in his absence at all. The toad looked absolutely dreadful. His brown robe was dusty and needed mending. His pointy hat was bent and settled at an odd angle on his greasy head --- it was almost as if he hadn't checked his appearance for days, possibly weeks. Sesshoumaru snorted and spared a quick glance back over at Aun --- his 'fearsome' mount was lashing his tail like some over grown lap-dog, vying with the little imp to regain the girl's undivided attention.  
  
The taiyoukai backed up in utter mortification --- these sloppy, overly- sentimental emotions were making him extremely uncomfortable.  
  
It was simply humiliating just how easily they could lose control of their feelings, he scoffed. But he couldn't hide from the simple truth. He supposed the real reason he couldn't stomach the tender scene was because their tears were such tangible, obvious reminders that HE was the cause of all their misery and sadness to begin with.  
  
Knowing Jaken's subservient nature, and the toad's fear of raising HIS ire, Sesshoumaru knew the condition of his family home would be nothing less than immaculate. However, the pretense of inspecting the grounds would give him the perfect excuse to escape from this emotional little group.  
  
With a curt nod, he left them all to their appalling little reunion. Rin seemed a great deal more animated and comfortable. Perhaps some time spent alone with Jaken and Aun might be best for these first few moments of homecoming.  
  
Besides, he reasoned, he really needed to collect his thoughts. Just what should he do NOW? What the HELL should he do with the girl?! And why had holding her close felt so --- good? Was it an effect of his damn youki inside her?  
  
Throughout the duration of the long journey, he had tried to recognize his power within her. Embarrassingly enough, he had perceived his youki rather quickly. It was very subtle, more of a scent than a feeling really, but that was still no excuse for having missed its existence for all these years. Did the bond only become palpable and obvious when her life was in danger? Like Inuyasha, did this power only flare to save her when she was close to death? And, if so, how could he test such a thing?  
  
He cast a final look back at the girl before striding through the ornate, carved doors of the shiro, disappearing without a word.  
  
Rin frowned slightly as she watched Sesshoumaru-sama march away. What could he be thinking? Before she had time to ponder her master's strange expression and even stranger behavior, she felt Jaken begin to fidget against her hold.  
  
Taking his lead from Sesshoumaru's rather curt and dismissive exit, Jaken broke instantaneously from his welcoming, tearful reverie in typical grumbling fashion.  
  
"Let me go, baka na ningen me!" he screeched in indigination. His whining words were slightly muffled by her tight grip, and Rin couldn't resist giving him one last fond squeeze before shoving him roughly away.  
  
"Ewww," she snapped down at him, sticking out her tongue and fixing the old toad with a sarcastic grin.  
  
"Disgusting," Jaken muttered back, brushing at his clothing as if she had contaminated it. "Human, do not presume to lay your grimy, filthy little fingers on this Jaken!" He straightened his jaunty hat. "Really --- this was so much easier when you were smaller than me," he grumbled.  
  
Rin rolled her eyes. "Ah – that over-active imagination again! I was never smaller than you!" she bit out. Jaken waved his staff in mock-threat and then sighed contentedly.  
  
Rin's sly, sarcastic smirk broke into a wide smile of utter delight.  
  
The young woman turned from the peevish, irritable youkai and walked along the path through the pretty courtyard, pausing momentarily to inspect the gardens. The evergreen azaleas were still blooming, their branches full of vivid patches of white, fuchsia and red. She decided she'd pick some of their flowers later to adorn the many vases within the rooms and corridors of the shiro. As she passed the herb beds, she expertly noted that the yatsude and ginseng were ready to harvest. With a knowing smile, she realized the old persimmon tree in the corner would doubtlessly be laden with its slightly-sour fall fruit as well. She paused and knelt by the small pond, smiling down at the bright koi as they rose to the surface of the water expectantly, waiting to be fed.  
  
Rin rose and brushed off her knees, turning to glance at the towering yanagi tree as she headed under the carved archway at the main entrance. How many hours had she concealed herself in the cool shade beneath those branches, reading, relaxing or forcing Jaken to come seek her in a rather undignified, un-demonlike child's game? Gods --- it was so wonderful to be back.  
  
The young woman entered the genkan, and leaned her naginata against the wall. She peered across the large receiving room, wondering where Sesshoumaru-sama had gone. Rin tried to keep her footsteps as soundless as possible as she took in all the comforting, familiar sights and sounds of home.  
  
The girl suddenly looked down at herself in shame. Being in this rich dwelling again, surrounded by all this elegance and history, made her painfully aware of how dirty and disheveled she must appear.  
  
Her clothes were streaked with dust and badly stained from when those villagers had dragged her to the ground. Her crisp white obi was discolored by dark spots of blood that she had wiped from the back of her wounded hand. And Aun's slobbering a few moments ago surely didn't help at all, she noted with embarrassment. She reached up and combed her fingers absently through her hair --- she didn't even want to speculate on what THAT looked like at the present moment.  
  
She guessed her first course of action would be to find some clean clothes from her room and get the fires stoked under the bathhouse. She would doubtlessly be able to deal with all these changes more easily if she was clean and rested.  
  
She headed purposefully through the receiving hall, taking the opposite route from her master, bearing straight in the direction of her small chamber. Jaken reappeared at her side, quite flushed and out of breath as he trotted nervously at her heels.  
  
"Where are you disappearing to, girl?" he wheezed, resuming his slightly- cross manner and looking anxiously behind him.  
  
"To my room, of course," Rin answered plainly, simply delighted to be able to converse with and rile the contrary toad again. As she turned into the final hallway, Jaken suddenly raced ahead of her much faster than she ever imagined his squat legs could carry him. The little demon blocked her path and tried to extend his ridiculously short arms across the width of the corridor.  
  
"No," he cried.  
  
"Jaken-sama," she said in confusion, "What are you doing? Get out of the way!" She brushed past him and readjusted her light pack with a warm chuckle.  
  
"No, NO," Jaken repeated, much more firmly this time. He backed up to lean against her door. "You don't want to go in there, girl."  
  
The shoji-screen hung slightly ajar. Rin realized it was broken from its track and that there were deep claw marks in the lacquered wood of the frame. She tried to peer past the small youkai and into the room beyond.  
  
"What happened?" she whispered. "Nani ga okottanda no?"  
  
Jaken looked away bashfully. "The lord destroyed --- er --- removed some of your belongings."  
  
Rin gasped and burst past him, crying out in dismay at the sight of her empty, ruined room.  
  
Jaken continued to follow quietly in her wake. "I tidied up as best I could," he offered. "Sesshoumaru-sama did put THIS Jaken in charge during his absence, you know. But you see, girl, I didn't think you'd ever be coming back. The master has been --- most agitated --- and difficult to understand of late."  
  
"Ohhhh," she whispered quietly, stooping to pick up the crushed pieces of a particularly lovely and favored sea-shell.  
  
She turned in disappointment. Her rich bureau was similarly smashed, the empty drawers stacked in a neat pile in the corner. Her fine clothes were nowhere to be seen. All of her little sketches, silly poems and songs, and the carefully sorted seeds she had painstakingly collected from last summer's garden were gone.  
  
But the loss of her belongings wasn't what concerned her most. She dashed across the room to the broken futon frame, cringing with embarrassment. Hopefully, when he rifled through her possessions, Sesshoumaru-sama had not found that silly little piece of paper with his name upon it. She covered her eyes --- why had she left something so maudlin and girlish beneath her pillows? She scrambled amid the few scattered scraps of fabric that remained, and her cheeks flamed a most peculiar scarlet. Jaken watched in utter bewilderment as Rin only continued to add to the mess he had so carefully attempted to clean.  
  
"Hey! Hey!" he scolded. The bizarre human girl was obviously searching frantically for --- something!?!  
  
"Jaken-sama, where's the rest of the bedding?" Rin called over her shoulder, flipping what was left of the mattress onto the floor and moaning in frustration.  
  
"Well --- I --- we --- burned it. We burned everything," Jaken admitted somewhat glumly.  
  
Rin's eyes widened and darted nervously from side to side as if in deep thought. "Did Sesshoumaru-sama find anything --- unusual --- when he went through --- my possessions?" she asked with exaggerated slowness. She realized the great taiyoukai was probably aware of the true depth of her pathetic feelings, but it was just plain disturbing to think of him faced with such telling physical evidence of her infatuation.  
  
"Unusual?" Jaken snorted. "Define unusual! Baka na ningen me, I was sneezing for weeks from all the junk you hoarded in here! Everything was UNUSUAL! All those useless, dead flowers!"  
  
Rin smiled patiently in spite of her growing shame. She didn't want to REALLY agitate Jaken so soon after being reunited. Besides, maybe the old toad was right --- maybe everything HAD gone into the fire. She sighed in resignation and turned back to rummaging through what remained of her room. Jaken had obviously tried his best to hide and repair the damage, but there was no mistaking the many deep acid burns splashed across the walls and furniture.  
  
Without warning a large, imposing shadow drifted across the far wall. They both jumped and spun around to find Sesshoumaru-sama staring back at them from the threshold.  
  
He had only been watching their exchange for a short moment. Soon after he had departed to see if the affairs of his house were in order, Sesshoumaru had suddenly remembered his uncharacteristic snap of self-control and his callous destruction of Rin's belongings. He noted the girl's hurt, stricken expression as she glanced back and forth between him and what was left of her gathered 'treasures'. Sesshoumaru met her wide, reproachful eyes --- he backed away from the ragged doorframe instinctively to give her some space.  
  
"Jaken," he called tersely over his shoulder. "Come with me."  
  
The toad threw Rin a worried look, and then trundled off after the tall demon. Rin watched them go curiously --- she hoped she hadn't gotten Jaken- sama into trouble already.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sesshoumaru made his way through twisting corridors to stop in the spacious receiving room. His tiny servant approached him warily, wondering what he might have done wrong.  
  
"Jaken, I need you to secure some items," the taiyoukai uttered in his elegant monotone. Jaken's bulbous eyes widened at the opportunity to show his loyalty to his master, and he waited excitedly for Sesshoumaru-sama to assign him some meaningful and momentous task.  
  
"Rin will be staying for quite ---" Sesshoumaru continued slowly, not knowing exactly how to proceed. "Staying for some --- time," he concluded vaguely. He wasn't prepared to divulge the whole story of Tenseiga's power --- it was still too new and strange.  
  
"What can this humble servant provide, my lord? What do you require, Master?" the imp piped earnestly. The toad bowed so low, Sesshoumaru was surprised his hat didn't tumble to the floor.  
  
"Nothing for myself. I wish to acquire some new provisions for the girl," he clarified.  
  
Jaken's jaw dropped most uncouthly and he shook his head, wondering if he had heard his master correctly.  
  
Sesshoumaru merely ignored the toad's stunned look. "Kimono, robes, tabi, simple geta" he listed with a heavy scowl, completely unused to talking so much about such inconsequential subjects. "And nothing too garish," he amended through gritted teeth. "The highest quality. Only shusu, rinzu or the finest habutae silk."  
  
"Certainly, master," the toad replied. He moved briskly toward the door to comply at once, even despite his great astonishment.  
  
"MATTE --- wait," the taiyoukai called out flatly behind him. "This Sesshoumaru is not finished."  
  
Jaken slunk back timidly, feeling slightly overwhelmed.  
  
"You must also bring back carving tools, fude, scrolls and youhishi."  
  
At the casual mention of paper and writing implements, the toad suddenly realized he'd better grab some of his own if he was to remember everything Sesshoumaru-sama was requesting. He grabbed a thin brush from a corner table, nearly upsetting a delicate vase and spilling the ink all over the finely-woven tatami in his scrambling haste to keep up with all the items his master was listing.  
  
Sesshoumaru ignored Jaken's fumbling and scratched his chin thoughtfully. His eyes suddenly fell upon Rin's spear, leaning against the wall in the entry-way alcove.  
  
"The girl carries a weapon now," he stated mildly. "Find her a sling and a cover for the blade so she may carry it with ease on long journeys."  
  
At the mention of 'long journeys', Jaken's yellow eyes gleamed again --- would their lives resume their NORMAL, nomadic pace? Not daring to stop and ask now, he just concentrated on writing, continuing to sloppily brush the characters across the page as fast as his stubby arms would allow.  
  
Sesshoumaru tried to think of what else a woman would want. He thought of the different ones he'd known over his long life --- his mother, that bitch his Father had brought home in pathetic attempt to replace her, Kagura, and a few of the other demonesses he'd rutted with in his callow youth. But Rin was SO damn different from any other female he had ever known.  
  
She seemed to delight in such simple things --- never in power, riches or finery. Still, she WAS a woman all the same --- why should she not be impressed with the best he could offer? Damn, this was simply ridiculous.  
  
A sudden picture of the girl's now-altered and more mature appearance quickly flashed through his mind and he settled on a perfect gift to complement her striking features.  
  
"Combs --- for her hair. She has been wearing it differently of late," he stated quietly. "Combs --- in silver."  
  
Jaken's eyes were so large it looked like they might pop from his skull.  
  
Sesshoumaru continued to pay no heed to the thoroughly flummoxed creature, as he suddenly chose to recall Rin's fair skin bathed in moonlight last night.  
  
"Pearls too," he instructed. "Delicate --- small," he revised quickly, not all that confident in the toad's aesthetic tastes. Small --- like her, whispered that embarrassingly strange voice in his mind again.  
  
Jaken moved to return the brush to the ink pot. "My lord, you really want me to acquire ALL this? But where?" he stammered. "And how?!"  
  
Sesshoumaru stared pointedly out the window, unexpectedly distracted by Rin's sudden appearance at the other end of the courtyard. The girl was hastily making her way to the bathhouse, peeking around the corners furtively to check if she was truly alone. She paused for a brief moment to pluck a few leaves from the honeysuckle vine that grew against the far wall.  
  
So that's was why she smelled the way she did, Sesshoumaru mused --- she would doubtlessly add the leaves to her bathwater or to the coals of the sauna. His eyes remained trained on the young woman as she divided and stacked a bundle of firewood. The taiyoukai continued to watch curiously as Rin found there was no oil in the little woven container set aside on the deck to help start the fire.  
  
The girl pouted only for a moment, and he observed in dry amusement as she simply whistled for Aun. The lumbering dragon was at her side in mere moments and Sesshoumaru was forced to shield his eyes against the following explosion of brilliant blue flame. As soon as the blast died down, he looked back in alarm, half expecting the entire bath-house to be up in smoke. But she was merely standing there in unconcerned, rollicking delight, patting Aun on his snouts, and beaming down at a roaring blaze. Clever, resourceful little thing, he mused.  
  
"I only trust this task to you Jaken," he stated inattentively to his stammering servant, still not taking his eyes from Rin. He watched as she climbed the few stairs up to the low deck, and began to disrobe. His breath caught as he got the smallest glimpse of her pale shoulder before she disappeared into the ofuro.  
  
He was snapped out of his daze by a small tug at his hakama. Jaken had moved to stand next to him, his large eyes welling up in simpering devotion. With his master's last declaration, all the toad's protests had died, and he choked and sputtered submissively, "Hai, hai, my lord! Kono Jaken wa zehi itte wa orimasu!!"  
  
Within the hour, the small, proud and tearful little youkai had saddled Aun, and the pair had departed to fulfill their master's first request in months.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Rin stretched and hopped down energetically from the bath-house deck feeling completely refreshed. She skipped barefoot from stone to stone on the winding pathway, rubbing at her wet hair with a large towel. Her eyes narrowed at the unanticipated sight of her master casually seated at the opposite end of the garden. Rin didn't know if she was frightened or relieved as he unexpectedly beckoned for her to join him.  
  
He sat on a small granite stairway, and he shifted patiently to one side so she could settle down comfortably beside him. Rin gaped --- her master had let his long, abundant hair free from that trailing ponytail. Surely he didn't change that because she had mentioned she preferred it loose? She eyed him with a questioning, leery look, but his gaze had become fixed on the darkening clouds as a few flakes of snow began to drift steadily down from the sky.  
  
"It hasn't snowed here in quite some time," he stated offhandedly, taking in a deep breath. "There will be a storm this night."  
  
Rin regarded him with confusion, still marveling at these casual, easy words uttered in his deep, usually reserved voice. Was he awaiting a response again? Was he inviting another conversation?  
  
Rin blinked up at the threatening color of the sky. "Ahhh," she stuttered back, "um, yes, it seems that way."  
  
She turned away very quickly --- how absolutely stupid she must sound! Sesshoumaru smirked, his sensitive ears picking up on the girl mocking herself as she repeatedly mouthed her own halting words.  
  
"The storms, the snow --- they never last here," he interceded. "Tell me, how did you find living in the cold on that old fool's --- iya --- Totosai's mountain?"  
  
Rin's eyebrows quirked at hearing him quell his own insult, and she smiled brightly, her confidence increasing by the minute. He was still actually choosing to talk with her! And more than that, he was trying to do it with utmost delicacy and respect for her feelings! She hoped this strange new tendency would continue, and she turned to face him fully, not even noticing that her knee brushed against his as she shifted herself closer.  
  
"It was alright at first, the snow --- it reminded me of you, actually," she exclaimed, belatedly grasping that she had just accidentally revealed that she thought of him often while they were parted. Rin pressed her hand over her mouth in mortification.  
  
Sesshoumaru blinked and did something she would never have predicted. He laughed --- not the mocking sound that usually meant some creature was about to die painfully, but a sound full of genuine humor. "Too cold?" he queried.  
  
"No," she smiled hesitantly, "it was ---" Beautiful, she finished in her mind. Sesshoumaru looked at her curiously, waiting for her to finish the rest of her statement. "It was --- never mind," she sighed, folding the damp towel across her lap.  
  
Rin blushed and turned again, and Sesshoumaru felt that unfamiliar knot in his chest once more. He was content to sit for awhile in silence as he wracked his brain for the subtleties of light conversation. He should end this shy lull with a kind statement, or a compliment of some manner. There was so much he could draw from, after all. She was so witty, so brave, so lovely --- so --- the words would not come out. He shifted and cast his eyes on her simple robe. That pale green color was rather attractive on her but the material was certainly not nearly as fine as she deserved.  
  
"Come," he whispered. Without thinking, he seized her small hand in his own and led her through the twisting maze of corridors to his room. He slowly drew the door open, tugging Rin forward gently when she instinctively balked. Jaken had told her long ago to never enter THIS particular chamber.  
  
Now she could only gulp and look around in wonder. Just as she expected, the large room was stark, simple, and white. The furniture was sparse, but elegant and finely crafted. Old weapons and ancient scrolls filled the shelves, everything ordered, pristine and neat.  
  
Sesshoumaru came to an abrupt halt in the center of the room. He was suddenly aware that he was still holding the girl's hand and released it promptly, looking slightly uncomfortable. Rin threw him another quizzical look --- she was certain the stripes on his cheeks were flushed to a slightly darker color.  
  
As soon as he let her go, she moved away to lean on a tidy writing table, pressing her hands tightly to her side, absolutely afraid to touch ANYTHING. Her eyes came to rest on a particularly tattered and time-worn scroll, and she peered down for a closer look. It was torn and singed a bit; the writing seemed familiar, yet somehow not.  
  
The corners of Sesshoumaru's eyes crinkled with amusement at her apparent unbridled curiosity. He lifted the scroll carefully. "It is our own language," he explained, "well, our language from a long, long time ago."  
  
He was secretly pleased when she moved closer with an inquisitive look. "From my honored father," he continued patiently, "It describes the hidden location of his grave and the Tetsusaiga."  
  
Rin looked up in interest and drew steadily nearer. He tapped a long, wicked claw carefully against a few of the strange lines. "See --- migi no kuroshinju. Black pearl on the right," he pointed out.  
  
Rin's smiled brightened --- she COULD make out the resemblance to the modern characters. She caught his gleaming tawny eyes and her grin died suddenly. Gods --- how OLD was he anyway? What was it like to live so many ages? He was so wise and powerful and she was ---  
  
"Will you teach me to understand?" she asked quietly.  
  
"Hai," he nodded. The more he talked, the easier his words began to flow, he realized. The taiyoukai suddenly discovered it might be interesting to hear her clever opinions on a few more critical and weighty subjects.  
  
But now was not the time. He moved slowly towards the far corner of the room, gesturing into an adjoining alcove. "This is where you will stay until Jaken returns with your new provisions," he remarked decisively.  
  
Rin followed quietly and gasped at the enormous sunken bed carved into the floor. She tried to stop her heart from hammering and hoped Sesshoumaru- sama wouldn't notice the source of her discomfort. That bed was NOT designed with sleep in mind!  
  
"New provisions? Stay here?!" Rin echoed with a squeak. "Wait, Jaken-sama is gone?"  
  
The young woman couldn't breathe--- she was alone with HIM?!  
  
"Hai, new provisions --- to replace what was --- lost," Sesshoumaru answered. "Jaken left with Aun little more than an hour ago."  
  
He frowned --- Rin's heart was racing again and her scent had changed. What was it now? He followed her wide-eyed gaze to the bed.  
  
That scent. Was that ---  
  
Sesshoumaru-sama shot her an alarmed look and turned briskly to rummage through a mono-oki, pulling out an old haori. It was a man's robe, but it was of a much finer material than the koromo she currently wore. It should prove sufficient until Jaken returned with some decent clothing for her.  
  
"Here," he stated, pushing the long robe into her hands brusquely. "This Sesshoumaru does not wish to see you in rags."  
  
Without another word or a second glance, he marched swiftly from the room.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
The hours dragged by uncomfortably, and night soon fell. Sesshoumaru was right --- the weather had turned most violent and Rin sighed irritably as another rumble of thunder echoed through the sky. She tossed on her new, unfamiliar bed --- his bed, she thought solemnly. Jaken had still not returned ---why in the world was he taking so long?  
  
She couldn't sleep. But then again, how could she EVER be expected to sleep comfortably in a bed after spending a night nestled in his arms? Rin smacked her pillow in agitation and kicked off the silken blankets and heavy kaimaki. Her throat was too dry --- she needed some water, she decided sourly. She rose from bed, adjusted his outgrown robe more securely about her, and pushed the delicate kaya netting aside. Tip-toeing across the room, she slid the door open with hardly a sound, and crept as silently down the halls as she possibly could.  
  
The lightening crackled fiercely across the sky, casting large eerie shadows on the wooden floor. Where was Sesshoumaru-sama tonight anyway? Rin threw a reflexive panicked look over her shoulder, half expecting him to be prowling through the murky darkness. She shook her head at her foolish fears and turned rapidly, only to let out a clipped shriek as she marched headlong into a pair of gigantic, malevolent crimson eyes. She snapped her jaw shut in embarrassment and relief --- it was merely a tapestry of that monstrous white dog, not the real thing itself. She cast a sheepish glance and tilted her head thoughtfully at the stylized image. The painted fabric did nothing to convey the creature's true horror and dreadfulness, she decided.  
  
Rin suddenly noticed a soft light glowing in an adjoining room --- the family shrine, she realized. She crossed under the gleaming threshold, and stared up at the rows of polished armor and powerful weapons on display.  
  
As the storm outside continued to rage, a strong breeze suddenly burst through the vaulted room. The biting gust caused something to flutter strangely in the corner, catching her immediate attention. A little scrap of paper?  
  
She hurried forward and reached out to grasp it nervously, turning the piece in her shaking hands. She unfolded the delicate paper gingerly and choked at the sight of HIS name framed by shakily-scrawled little crescent moons! It WAS the silly scrap of parchment she'd hidden under her pillow --- how on earth did this get here?  
  
"This Sesshoumaru couldn't get rid of it," came a deep voice from behind her. Rin jumped, whirling around to see the taiyoukai reclining in the corner. He had removed his armor and she stared at down at him, clearly intrigued --- she had so very rarely seen him without it! The young woman noted that his physique was slightly heavier than his half-brother's. Though as wiry and lean, his tall frame was somehow more muscular, more solidly developed.  
  
She returned the crumpled paper to the small pedestal in embarrassment, not really knowing what to say. "That was so long ago --- Rin had forgotten about that," she murmured, pretending to be greatly interested in a battered shield on the wall.  
  
"Why are you still awake, Rin?" he inquired patiently, rising to his feet. "Do you not like your new room?"  
  
She drifted back away from him, her stomach fluttering strangely at hearing him say her name in such a soft tone.  
  
The young woman circled apprehensively around another prominently displayed piece of armor, anything to avoid taking note of the demon's proximity.  
  
"I just couldn't sleep, my lord," she finally answered after an elongated pause.  
  
Sesshoumaru nodded. He had been having similar difficulties and he very much doubted it was due to the fact that he was currently occupying a different niche of the house. He cleared his throat and moved to inspect a cracked halberd on the wall.  
  
Rin followed his seemingly dismissive motions --- wait, was he --- was he nervous as well? More and more of her childhood bravado was returning with each passing moment ---  
  
She should ask him her fate, or ask him if he had meant all those terrible words he had said before he abandoned her. But suddenly, a more immediate, infinitely personal question rushed to the forefront of her mind.  
  
"Why --- why did you hold me last night?" she blurted abruptly.  
  
Sesshoumaru sighed. Maybe he should have let the girl go before she awoke; this was so damn difficult. "Because it was cold," he supplied practically.  
  
"Oh. I see," she whispered, feeling a bit crestfallen and slightly humiliated. Of course, he had only held her because of the night air!  
  
The taiyoukai felt something tug in his chest again as he watched the girl proudly try to mask her obvious disappointment.  
  
"And because this Sesshoumaru wanted to," he added before he could stop himself.  
  
Rin's eyes widened and she peered back at him from behind another pedestal. "Will you – maybe - hold me again tonight? Onegai?"  
  
Sesshoumaru-sama looked a little startled by her hesitant request, and Rin fully expected to be ordered back to his room. She turned to go before she had to hear that mortifying command ---  
  
The taiyoukai watched the defeated slump in the girl's shoulders as she walked past him. There was no moment to reconsider, no second to doubt.  
  
"Yes," he uttered quietly.  
  
He led the way, walking steadily down the hall without looking back at her. Rin followed nervously, eyes trained on that flowing silvery curtain of hair. They arrived back at his room much faster than she anticipated --- why did it suddenly seem far closer than she remembered?  
  
The shoji-screen was still open, and Sesshoumaru set his jaw as he crossed the threshold. What in all the levels of hell had he just agreed to? It had been one thing to hold her in the wilderness for warmth, but to embrace her in his own bed?  
  
Rin hesitated at the doorway as well, now focused on his bare feet as they padded silently across the floor. Numbly, she gathered the light robe about her again and moved to join him.  
  
She stared down at the all-too-inviting collection of pillows, quirking her head at the silky ripples in the blankets, and waited nervously. They both stood in tense indecision on either side of the large mattress, neither moving, each seemingly waiting for a sign from the other.  
  
"Look at me," Sesshoumaru murmured suddenly. Rin seemed reluctant to comply, but when she finally turned her face upwards to meet his intense gaze, he felt the oddest mix of burning pain and soothing contentment. Her lovely face was once again full of more emotions than he could even begin to understand.  
  
"You would wake up willingly in these arms?" he asked somewhat skeptically.  
  
"If you would allow me," Rin answered shyly. She hoped it was the right reply. She understood more than ever that he was holding back, choosing his words and guarding his expression with the utmost care. The young human girl didn't really understand ALL of what was happening here, but she realized they were involved in some a strange, new dance. Though she didn't understand all the steps, she instinctively recognized the need to proceed with caution.  
  
The youkai lowered his eyes first, turning to gaze down at his claws. "Why were you never afraid of this Sesshoumaru? These arms, these hands --- have killed many of your kind."  
  
"But they also saved me," she whispered gently. "Besides, I'm not sure they really are my kind --- not anymore." She tapped her small hand over her heart, as if seeking to touch the piece of his youki that was causing it to beat.  
  
The stoic demon lord seemed to be lost in his thoughts as he pondered the implication her soft words and gentle action. Without another statement or question, he knelt slowly and simply pulled the covers back, moving gracefully to settle between them.  
  
Rin held her breath and slid under the blankets a moment later, turning away to stare out at the wall in her nervousness. There was an awkward moment of shifting their long hair and re-adjusting their positions --- finally, he extended an arm so she could cozy up comfortably in the crook of his shoulder. The strong limb wrapped around to enfold her in a tight hug, and she idly reached up to trace the stripes on his wrist. She nuzzled into his warm chest, dimly wondering what it would feel like if it were bare.  
  
Sesshoumaru gasped at the sudden, inadvertently intimate contact and pulled his hips back in shock. He was not sure if she --- or himself for that matter --- was ready to deal with the repercussions of his instinctive, and decidedly male, reaction to her proximity. Gods, he had seen four centuries come and go before she came into his life --- she was still so young; what was happening to him?  
  
Rin didn't seem to be aware of her master's deep discomfort and inner turmoil; she was simply content to just be snuggled against him. This was so wonderful and strange --- she had wanted something, ANYTHING like this for so, so long.  
  
Sesshoumaru was finding the experience strangely calming as well. Not since his childhood, he realized, had he ever really just embraced a woman in his arms for comfort, nor had he been held in return --- and most certainly never in his OWN bed. The taiyoukai toyed with a lock of the girl's dark hair, allowing the silky strands to run through his claws. He stared down at her full lips as they parted in a rather quirky grin in response to his tender actions.  
  
"Oyasumi nasai," Rin whispered shakily, suddenly wishing that she could see his handsome face.  
  
"Un," he mumbled back somewhat dazed, certainly not accustomed to murmuring kind words or endearments in the dark. His free arm merely shifted, and he reached out to rub small circles on her back.  
  
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~  
  
Sorry tons o' vocab this time around!  
  
shiro: castle  
  
genkan: entry hall  
  
yatsude: herb  
  
yanagi: willow  
  
Nani ga okottanda no: "What happened?"  
  
Baka na ningen me: "You stupid human!"  
  
Fude: brushes  
  
youhishi: parchment  
  
Kono Jaken wa zehi itte wa orimasu!!: "This Jaken will willingly go!"  
  
Ofuro: bathhouse  
  
iya: "I mean ---"  
  
migi no kuroshinju: black pearl on the right  
  
mono-oki: cupboard  
  
koromo: robe  
  
kaimaki: quilted winter blanket  
  
kaya: netting, canopy  
  
Oyasumi nasai: "goodnight"  
  
Un: yes  
  
THANK YOU TO NOTOES OUT THERE FOR PROOF-READING! THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU FOR YOUR TIME!  
  
Rabid Inu-Girl: Thanks!  
  
Manon Le Chat: Hi again! How you doing? Yes --- that last chapter was slightly sugary and this one's even sappier, huh? Figured another mini- angst break was in order! Thanks for all your encouragement!  
  
Marnika: Thank you --- I missed that! Anyway, I took your advice and switched it so hopefully it'll come up under Sess/Rin now.  
  
DarkAngel: Yes – sorry, sorry, sorry about the wait! Oh - why do I have to go to work?  
  
Dame Night --- aka Connie: Hi! Thank you! Yeah – I agree with you there! The end of the manga is so near and I'm dreading the end result as well. I just don't see that super happy ending! Yes – and isn't Rin just the awesome –EST little character ever!  
  
Cattico: Yep, relationship's-a-mending! Might hit a few upcoming rough patches, but I think I have it all worked out! Evil laughter!  
  
Katzouchka: Sess/Rin bliss! Yeah!  
  
ZeldaLink786: Thank you so much for all those reviews! Glad you like the story --- yes, poor, confused Sesshoumaru; I take great pleasure in messing with the poor guy's head in the story! Ha, ha! More semi-evil laughter!  
  
Sorry, I know I missed a few (well, A LOT). I swear I'm not a jerk, I'm just TIRED! I really, REALLY appreciate every review and I can't believe you guys are still reading this! Thank you! It started as just a way to pass a very LOUSY winter, but now it's just plain fun! 


	16. Chapter 15

Hey there! Thanks for all the reviews! Some spoilers --- third movie --- just a mini-mention of the sword, Souunga. Anyway, hope you like it. I might have rushed this chapter but, oh well, I was having too much fun!

Chapter 15: Dandan Kawatteyuku

Inuyasha charged into the mouth of the yawning cavern, the Tetsusaiga already drawn and ready to unleash its full power. The hanyou's keen eyes adjusted rapidly to the sudden shift in lighting from the blinding snow outside to the inky darkness of the cave.

He steeled himself for the worst, detecting the distinctive scent of his ruthless, evil brother all around him. He turned warily, half-expecting to run across the mangled, scorched corpses of Rin and the equally unfortunate Totosai at any moment.

In the next few seconds, Miroku was at his side. The monk's jaw was tense, his lips set in a grim line, and the hanyou smiled wickedly at his decidedly violent expression --- he hadn't seen his old friend this angry in quite some time. Well, they both had DAMN good reason to seek vengeance now --- neither had forgiven the taiyoukai for using their own women against them as leverage. With those thoughts, Inuyasha cast a nervous glance back to Kagome and Sango. Both women were mounted astride Kirara and waiting somewhat uneasily at the mouth of the cave with an equally angry-looking Kohaku.

He turned to motion silently to Miroku, and together they cautiously proceeded further into the forge. Inuyasha noted that many of the fine pieces of armor and weaponry had been knocked to the floor; everything was lying about in haphazard, jumbled piles. His nose twitched again and he rushed forward, his golden eyes suddenly coming to focus on the twisted, crumpled form of Totosai.

"Jiji!" he shouted, seizing the old demon by the shoulders. _Was he dead?!_ He shook the unconscious sword-smith roughly. "Totosai!" he hollered.

The old demon's eyes flew open with a startled snap. "What the hell?" he shrieked, slapping the hanyou away. "What the HELL is wrong with you! I just settled for a nice nap and you have to come scare the hell out of me with that ugly face of yours?" He poked a gnarled claw at the half-breed's bruised cheek. "Ohhh --- looks like big brother gave YOU quite the pounding!"

Inuyasha dropped Totosai to the floor in disgust, clenching his hand into an angry fist. "What's wrong with ME? What the hell is wrong with you, old man? Where's Sesshoumaru?" he raged. "Where's Rin? Is she still alive?"

"Of course, she's still alive," Totosai countered, as if it were the most obvious fact in the world. "They left together, after all!"

At those words the rest of the assembled party trotted forward in near perfect unison. "WHAT?!"

"Sesshoumaru took Rin back?" Kagome murmured happily. "I'm so glad." Inuyasha looked at his grinning mate, absolutely dumbfounded.

"Can't say I blame him either," Miroku added thoughtfully, his anger temporarily forgotten as his hands moved in the air to trace a perfect outline of a woman's soft curves. "After all, she is a beautiful, simply gorgeous, delicious little thing."

Sango snorted and tightened her grip on the Hirakoutsu. Despite her husband's roving eye and rather hentai imagination, over the years his hands had stayed to himself, (or rather, strictly to her!), and that was all that mattered. "Sukebe houshi! You're a dirty old man," she chided scornfully.

"Easy with that old man stuff, wife," he shot back.

"NANDA??" Inuyasha bellowed again. "What the hell is wrong with you people? Have you all lost your minds!? Have you forgotten what Sesshoumaru's done?"

He began to count the taiyoukai's recent transgressions on his fingers. "Number one, Shippou can't EVEN move from all the running around he's had to do over the past two days! Two, our house is nothing but splinters! Three, Kagome --- Kagome ---"

His words faded into a menacing growl. "I don't care about the rest of you, but I'm tracking that son of a bitch down and I'm flattening him! I swear, I'm gonna strangle him with his own tail! I'm gonna ---

"You will do no such thing!" Totosai cried. "You leave 'em alone, or so help me I'll break that precious sword of yours faster then you can say 'I'm covered in fleas'!'"

"You fucking old lunatic! I DON'T have fleas!"

"Well --- begging your pardon, Master Inuyasha," came another scratchy old voice, "but technically you do!"

Inuyasha's golden eyes came to settle on the tip of his own nose. Or, more specifically, they came to settle on the minuscule creature hopping excitedly there.

"Iteeee!" he hissed, reaching up to flatten the unwelcome little blood-sucker.

"Myouga-jiji? What the hell do you want?"

"Well – I came to deliver some news," the old flea began. "But while we're on the subject of Sesshoumaru and that girl, for what's its worth, I'd like express MY humble thoughts on the matter! I'm simply delighted that the old master's heir might be thinking of finally taking a mate --- especially one as sweet and ---"

Before the creature could get another word out, Inuyasha had promptly squished him again, a maniacal expression lighting his face.

Totosai rolled his eyes at the hanyou's actions. "You rotten mutt. Honestly, boy, maybe you could accept the possibility that your brother's in love with her?"

"In love with her?"

"Yeah – of course, he's in love with her --- he just doesn't know it yet. Just give them some time, let them settle. Let them nurture and heal their relationship --- you'll see."

"Sesshoumaru --- nurture?! I think I'm gonna throw up," Inuyasha scoffed.

"Not on my floor," Totosai quipped sardonically. "Now get out, spoiled puppy."

That was it --- the hanyou had reached the end of his patience and, before Kagome could stop him, he had delivered a well placed cuff to the old demon's skull. The miko merely backed out of the way of the rushing blast of orange flame that ensued, and directed an exasperated sigh at the squabbling pair. She paced the length of the cave, absently rubbing small circles on her growing belly. Everything was going to be alright --- everyone was happy.

Well, maybe not.

She caught a glimpse of Sango wrapping her arms around Kohaku's shoulders to give him a small encouraging squeeze. The young man looked dazed, and was currently struggling to hide his obvious disappointment about Rin's fate. "It's okay, aneue," he whispered down at his caring sibling. "I understand. I didn't know her very well, after all." He turned to stare wistfully at a carefully carved kabuto lying against the wall, the piece an obvious example of the pretty young girl's work.

"I've always known she was in love with --- him," he gritted on. "You can see it in her eyes. Besides, if the powers of the Tenseiga are truly as Totosai-sama says, she would be better suited for a life among youkai than --- than with someone like me."

At the young demon slayer's words, Inuyasha stopped his brawling and appeared to draw inward to his own thoughts as well. "This makes no sense," he whispered, his words directed at no one in particular. "I don't fucking understand Sesshoumaru at all." The hanyou gazed into the distance, appearing somewhat sad and unguarded for the slightest of moments. "I don't KNOW him at all."

The sword-smith came to stand at his side, their short brawl temporarily forgotten. "Then you've got to trust me," he stated patiently. "It'll all work out. Sesshoumaru can't be forced into anything. He's got to realize his own mind. But he loves that girl. Though, mark my words, he'll be the last to admit it! He needs her," he fixed his beady eyes on Inuyasha, clapping the very confused demon on the shoulder. "And he needs you too. Just wait --- you'll see."

Inuyasha's eyes narrowed at Totosai's rather cryptic warning. Before he had time to ask him to explain, the old demon's hands shot in the air to deliver a resounding slap to his already bruised face. "And you! What the hell is this --- bringing your mate up into this weather in such 'delicate' condition!?! Honestly, I think you may have taken one too many blows to the head!"

"I told her to stay home, but she never listens," Inuyasha whined in his own defense, scowling at the miko's back. "She wouldn't stay behind," he argued.

"Well, see there, my boy," Totosai observed. "That's one thing you and aniki have in common already. Like I've said before, you both seem to fall hard for these headstrong, determined, and willful girls."

Kagome smiled at the pair --- in her mind those words seemed the highest form of compliment ever. She had spoken the absolute truth --- she was happy for Rin. Though she didn't really know her very well, it delighted her to think that the young girl might be getting a chance to have what her heart so desperately longed for. Even her mistrust and less than favorable opinion of the ruthless, cold taiyoukai seemed somewhat diminished at the thought that he might truly care for his indomitable little human companion.

Miroku's staff abruptly gave a rather pronounced rattle, the resounding noise snapping her out of her dreamy reverie.

"Gentleman!" the monk called out. "And, of course, most beautiful, gorgeous and --- ahem --- voluptuous ladies!" He threw a rather naughty wink at Sango. Even after all these years, he still couldn't help admiring just how amazing her slim form looked in that tight, shiny black leather battle gear. Though his beleaguered wife merely shook her head in annoyance at his quick, flirty gesture, she couldn't hide the pink blush that presently stained her cheeks.

Miroku smiled warmly at her rather telling rosy complexion, and cleared his throat.

"Anyway, I think it's time we discovered just why our tiny friend is here!" The young monk gestured down at the still recovering Myouga as the little flea hopped up from the dirt floor to land on Totosai's shoulder, wisely staying out of Inuyasha's reach.

"Yeah," the irritable hanyou snapped in agreement, "Just what the hell to you want, jiji?"

Myouga's prickly little moustache bobbed vigorously as he spouted his hurried news. "I've just come from the Northern Lands, my lord! I have word from Kouga and the wolf packs. He wanted me to give you a message --- he wanted me to tell you word-for-word --- "

The flea trailed off, suddenly appearing deathly afraid.

"What does that bastard want? What did he say?" Inuyasha's eyes narrowed in suspicion to gleam threateningly in the murky gloom of the cavern.

"Um --- word for word, my lord? Really?! I don't really know if I can!" the flea wailed.

"What did he say?!" Inuyasha hissed again, raising his fist as the others all began to back up.

Myouga's voice became nothing more than a petrified squeak. "He says: _Inu koro, get your LAZY, pitiful, good-for-nothing, foul-smelling, stinking, fucking worthless hide up here NOW!_"

A rather inhuman snarl began to reverberate through the cave. "Keh! Me --- come to him? Is Kouga out of his mind? I answer to NO ONE, let alone one skinny, scrawny, STUPID, pathetic, yase ookami that should have been drowned at birth! Why doesn't he get off his ass and come here?" Inuyasha jeered.

"Well, my lord, the lady Ayame DID just give birth to another strong and healthy young pup! He can't abandon her now --- not with so many other mouths to feed!"

Kagome's eyes widened and she couldn't help interrupting the tiny flea's explanation for the wolf's prolonged absence. "ANOTHER pup?" she cried. "USO! Just how MANY is that now!?!"

Myouga held up three of his hands, ticking off the numbers on his near microscopic little fingers. "Ahhh - Let's see. One, Kouki; two, Choukyosei; three --- ohhh, I forget that one's name, but he's a wicked little devil --- sharp teeth!" He paused, as if remembering some intense pain.

"And --- and let's not forget four and five. Mieika and Kousai, are twins and the spitting image of their mother; six, Akukaze; seven --- " the flea scratched his little head thoughtfully. "Wait - I think there's another set of twins in there," he mumbled absently.

Inuyasha scowled, not at all pleased that the northern lands would one day be overrun with countless miniature versions of that AWFUL wolf. The girls appeared equally horrified --- though more at the thought of poor Ayame enduring labor for nearly as many times as years that had passed. Miroku, of course, appeared rather impressed.

"And of course, Ginta and Hakkaku have started new families of their own as well," Myouga continued with a chuckle. "I think that's another five between the two of them! Gotta make up for their pack getting decimated all those years ago, after all."

Inuyasha brushed his bangs off his face with another snicker. "Keh --- so what the fuck is Kouga's problem anyway? Too many bottoms to wipe?" the hanyou mocked. "That scrawny bastard's always bragging about how powerful he is --- why doesn't he take care of his own troubles himself?"

"Because, Lord Inuyasha, he believes he knows where Naraku is," Myouga stated ominously.

"What the hell did you just say?" Inuyasha breathed.

Sesshoumaru awoke gradually, finding himself tangled contentedly in warm, soft blankets; his arms still wrapped around one equally warm and soft dark-haired human woman.

He shifted slowly, and pulled his limbs free from hers, trying desperately not to wake the still slumbering girl. He rose from the comfortable feather mattress, and carefully brushed back the fine netting surrounding the bed with his claws. Without a sound, the taiyoukai moved to stand at the window overlooking the ocean.

These were the mornings he used to love best. The threatening grey clouds had dissipated, but the gale had not fully blown itself back out to sea. He was struck with a sudden memory from the carefree days of his youth --- how he used to spend blustery sunrises such as these racing Aun against the wind, skimming over the foaming crests of the breaking waves.

Nowadays, the same dramatic weather changes were NOT marked by matching excitement, but only by the shooting aches and dull soreness in his still not fully-healed left arm. He flexed his claws, already beginning to feel that annoying tingle as it spread through the new muscles and tendons in response to the dampness and chill in the air.

The blinding glare of sunrise was magnified by the stark white walls of the room, and Rin suddenly snapped awake, blinking rapidly to adjust to the streaming dawn light. She felt cold, and reached out for the taiyoukai --- only to find him gone. "Sesshoumaru-sama?"

That small coo and the steady rise of her drumming heartbeat alerted him that Rin had roused behind him, even despite his best efforts not to jostle her from sleep. He cast a quick glance back to the bed just in time to see the young woman sit up, arching her back and stretching languorously. Her slow movements were all the more provocative because they were not meant to be so --- her actions were innocent and guileless, not intentionally alluring.

Which only served heighten the seduction, he realized with dismay.

The girl's eyes were wide and solemn, and she pulled the blankets up to her chin, looking increasingly unsure of what to do next. She offered him a warm smile and he suddenly wished he'd remained looking out over the water.

Rin still couldn't believe this was really happening. Sesshoumaru-sama was staring down at her, and all she could do was continue to remind herself to breathe. He was so, so beautiful now, just standing there with his form somewhat obscured by the thin layers of netting and the intense orange glow of daybreak.

She had just spent a SECOND night in the taiyoukai's arms --- she ran her hand along the soft blankets, dimly wondering who else had awoken in her place over the centuries.

In all the years since she had come to travel with him, she couldn't recall a occasion when he'd brought a demoness back here. Of course, he HAD often left her and Jaken behind, disappearing from time to time to engage in his own pursuits. But she had always known her place and had the wisdom to never question him about where he went or WHO he met. She suddenly thought of what happened between Kagura and her master, and bristled heatedly.

She sighed in resignation --- Sesshoumaru-sama was handsome and powerful, and it was foolish to envy his undoubtedly numerous past lovers. His undoubtedly numerous, countless, plentiful, abundant, FREQUENT past lovers, she grated in her mind. Her jealous thoughts were suddenly interrupted as her stomach grumbled loudly in protest and her hands flew down to her belly in embarrassment. Rin was suddenly painfully aware that her last meal had been BEFORE she had departed for the miko's village ---

Sesshoumaru's brow furrowed. "Are you hungry?" he asked in a stern tone, startling her from her discomfiture and indecision.

Rin swallowed noisily and pushed the covers aside. "Yes, my lord. My last meal was two days ago," she whispered in a faint, somewhat raspy tone. "So much has happened since then, that I really didn't think about it --- until now."

Sesshoumaru watched in alarm as the girl rose slowly, stumbling in disorientation. In the next instant, he was at her side.

Rin cursed herself for her weakness. So far she was doing a 'brilliant' job to prove to her master that she had some strength and substance! Well, if anything, she thought sarcastically, at least this would ease her lord's fears about this strange bond between them. Judging by how weak she felt at the present moment, she really couldn't have drawn in TOO much of his great strength.

The taiyoukai did not utter a word and stood at her elbow to help guide her down to the large kitchens. Halfway there, he huffed impatiently. He was tired of merely assisting and, most especially, he was definitely tired of their annoyingly slow and tedious progress. Gently, he picked Rin up to carry her the rest of the distance, even despite her soft protests and characteristic display of stubborn pride.

Luckily, in that last tirade, when he had emptied the contents of the girl's room, he had not raided and destroyed the contents of the kitchens as well. The cupboards were still stocked with food palatable enough for a human: walnuts, chestnuts, hie, hoshi-ii, salted abalone, and toasted goma filled the shelves. Everything was dried and carefully preserved keeping with the demands of their traveling, roaming lifestyle.

Compared to his Father's day, however, the pantry was relatively empty. Many demons, Chichiue included, accepted tithing and offerings from local ningen villages, a practice HE'D always held in contempt. To accept contributions from a human, to accept their aid, or lead them to believe they had secured some protection or safety in exchange for their pathetic bribes --- that was truly repulsive and weak.

It would appear, however, that Jaken had NO problems with the practice. Sesshoumaru scowled at a few earthenware jars of fine sake that had been recently added to the shelves. It was obvious that his small servant had been drowning his woes and easing his loneliness with fine spirits in his master's absence.

All and all, this was not the most ideal, nutritious or appetizing of selections, but it should prove adequate enough for the present. Rin was weak and would doubtlessly need something more substantial to regain her vigor --- sometime in the next few days he would need to hunt game to provide something fresh.

He could go tomorrow, he mused, as he watched her rifle enthusiastically through the stores of food. Or, perhaps, right now --- as soon as her appetite was satisfied --- they could go down to the beach and forage in the receding tide. It had been so long since he had enjoyed the simple pleasure of just walking along the water's edge with Rin.

He cast a quick glance back at the girl, shaking his head in disapproval as he caught her automatically reaching for a small parcel of sweet noshiume.

"No," he declared firmly, as she groaned in protest. He pulled the dried fruit from the girl's hands as she was about to bolt it down. He frowned; the sticky plums were one of her favorite treats, but he doubted she'd be able to keep anything that sugary or syrupy in her stomach after so long without a meal.

He continued to watch her, noting how the rosy bloom had begun to return to her soft cheeks. With each passing moment, her strength and spirits appeared to rise. She seemed to be increasingly more confident with his close proximity --- unconsciously, he reached out to stroke her hair gently, unable to keep himself from touching her.

"Are you feeling better now?" he queried as she quickly finished her more practical, appropriate, and wholly tasteless meal of plain hoshi-ii.

"Un," she piped, sniffing dubiously at one of the tokkuri brimming with strong sake. She put the jar down with a grimace of disgust.

"De wa iku zo," he stated gruffly.

"Yes, my lord. Where are we going, Sesshoumaru-sama?" Rin asked curiously. She trotted at his heels, trying to keep up with his long, fixed strides. He headed purposefully to the shrine, stopping within to pick up his o-yorai from the corner.

He did not answer, completely intent on the many buckles and clasps of the new armor. Damn it --- the fucking weather! Every time it changed as quickly as this, his left arm would suffer and pain him, his fingers becoming stiff and numb. Sesshoumaru struggled unsuccessfully with the ties of the o-yorai, cursing Inuyasha and the Tetsusaiga for the thousandth time that year alone.

Rin watched in indecision. She kept reaching out to assist him, only to pull her hands away as his look became increasingly dark and frustrated. Offering him aid when he obviously didn't want or need it is what got her into this whole situation to begin with.

Finally, she could take his struggles no longer. After her months of independence she would not allow herself to fall back into that old insecure pattern of submissive, weak-willed behavior. They were alone --- and if this was to wound his pride, so be it. If she was to remain with Sesshoumaru-sama, she couldn't spend each day fearing she'd displease and offend him.

Sesshoumaru jerked in surprise as he felt a small, cool hand gently take hold of his wrist.

"Here, my lord," came Rin's soft voice. "Let me help."

The girl sidled close, and he allowed her to push his aching arm out of the way so she could tug expertly at the knotted laces. Deftly, she moved to fasten the armor firmly around his frame.

"I can change this for you, you know. Make it more suited to your --- needs," she stated carefully as she eyed the rivets critically. He threw her a quizzical look.

"I mean no disrespect," she continued to babble on, mostly just to distract herself from the fact that she was running her hand over his ribs. "It's just that this piece was originally commission for another youkai."

Sesshoumaru's breath deepened in relaxation as he allowed those delicate fingers to tend to him. She had learned much at the forge and he watched in fascination as she adjusted the o-yorai as skillfully as any seasoned warrior. She fastened the final bindings, reaching to absently brush a long lock of his hair over his shoulder to keep it from tangling in the many vicious, sharp spikes. She waited demurely for his appraisal.

"Hnnn." He moved his arms experimentally, finding the armor perfectly balanced and comfortable --- tight and secure, yet not constrictive in any way.

"Go retrieve your weapon," he ordered. "You will need it."

The young woman quirked her brow. "Where are we going?" she repeated.

"The tide is low. Have you forgotten how to dig asari for your supper?" he chided.

"Certainly not," Rin answered in a mock huff.

As she hurried off, he turned and made his way deeper into the shrine to retrieve Tenseiga and Toukijin from the far end of the room. He was still having trouble believing he had been so distracted last night that he had left the two swords here. He tucked the blades firmly into his sash and strode imperiously to meet Rin at the ornate entry way.

She stepped through the massive doors ahead of him, racing forward to grab an old woven basket from the corner of the garden. He followed her into the sunshine, quietly surprised that she returned immediately to stand at his side so he could carry her down to the shore. He was pleased --- she needed no urging or hints this time.

Together they slowly paced the whole long length of the white beach, seeking out the unmistakable divots that marked the breathing outlets of the shellfish trapped by the receding tide.

Though he offered no assistance with the actual digging, Sesshoumaru was rather eager to point out all of the ones that she missed. Rin couldn't contain her brilliant smile of delight at watching his predatory nature and rapacious instincts so obviously war with his equally strong desire to remain dignified, aloof and meticulously clean!

She ignored the fussy taiyoukai, as she stabbed her naginata into the sand yet again. After pulling the blade out, she would then burrow her fingers into the deep hole she'd created to snatch up another one of the surprisingly quick clams with a small shout of triumph. "Iya!" she laughed as it squirted a jet of salt water at her. She dropped the wriggling, slippery little creature unceremoniously into her woven basket.

Rin began humming quietly, and she smiled back at Sesshoumaru every so often, taking full advantage of this opportunity by studying his profile. He was so perfect, so gorgeous, and just the thought that she had shared his bed last night made her head whirl. Would they lie together AGAIN tonight? She wasn't sure just how she really felt about that --- the feeling was lost somewhere between one part anticipation and one part mortal dread.

The taiyoukai was taking this time to quietly examine his energetic companion as well. He watched as she squished the cold sand between her toes, and tried to ignore how fetching she looked in his old sea-grey haori. She seemed distracted by everything, darting here and there, just like one of the little chidori playing in the foam. She was currently poking at an upside kubutogani with a piece of driftwood, as its spidery legs waved haphazardly in the air. She helped the unfortunate creature right itself, smiling as it scuttled back to disappear into the waves. He shook his head at her playful, mischievous antics, suddenly struck with the desire to hear her pleasant voice again.

"You spoke to my half-brother," the youkai intoned. Rin squinted up against the bright sunlight to focus on him --- his words were more of a statement than a question really.

"Hai," she returned simply, stooping to resume her hunt for her supper. "I arrived in his village soon after you departed."

"His woman --- lived?" the taiyoukai inquired blandly. Rin looked up in surprise at his uncharacteristic show of concern.

"Yes, master. Both the miko, and the little one she carries, were fine when I last saw them."

Sesshoumaru's eyebrow rose marginally, but otherwise he showed no other reaction.

Rin's lips curled in a cynical smile. "Inuyasha was another matter entirely, my lord," she drawled, rocking up onto her tiptoes, as she edged past him. "One couldn't help but notice he was very soundly beaten." She was always proud of his victories, no matter who the opponent might be.

Sesshoumaru tried not to smile himself as he noticed Rin trying to stifle her mildly satisfied, smug look. He supposed that over the years his strong negative opinions of Inuyasha had definitely come to color her perceptions and influence her viewpoints on the hanyou as well. That, or the fact that when she was young, his half-brother had once nearly attacked her while he was transformed and possessed by the mysterious sword, Souunga! Being charged by a ravening, mindless demon would most definitely bias anyone, he noted wryly.

And, speaking of Rin's attitudes and opinions, this was the perfect opportunity to discover her outlook on THAT most recent and unexpected development between the pathetic bastard and his equally annoying miko.

"And how does that strike you?" he inquired blandly. "That foolish woman carrying HIS pup?"

"I am not sure," Rin answered slowly, deciding to risk his ire again in favor of being completely truthful and honest. "The miko has always been kind to me and I am happy for the pair of them, but --- but this pregnancy certainly will cause quite a few problems." She reached up and knotted her long, slightly-damp hair at her nape to keep it out of the wet sand. She waited for her master's reaction to her words, dimly wondering how he managed to look so regal and dignified with that entire length of silvery mane dancing around his attractive face in the strong wind.

Sesshoumaru straightened his shoulders and regarded her critically as he crossed his arms over his chest. "Explain," he commanded.

"Well, I mean, what will they do about Naraku? With the Shikon no Tama so close to completion, how can Kagome-sama be called upon to purify the jewel while carrying a child with youki in its blood?" With that the girl gave an abrupt elated squeal, and her thoughtful discussion was temporarily forgotten as she scampered to snatch up a couple of purple sea urchins trapped in a small tide pool.

The taiyoukai stared down at the girl, his amber eyes glowing with pride at her words. His little woman was quite clever, keen and incisive --- he had been thinking along the very same lines himself. Wait --- HIS little woman?! He shook his head, surprised he would make such a statement, even in his mind.

"Yes --- I-I have been pondering over the same concerns," he agreed, quickly recovering from his wayward thoughts to leap after her. "The half-breed had better entreat the gods that the wolf prince is up to the challenge of defending his shards. Naraku will no doubt come for them soon."

Rin wrinkled her nose at that quick mention of the ookami. For the slightest instant, a tiny, dark fantasy featuring that arrogant, murderous creature being thoroughly annihilated by Naraku ran through her mind. She blushed profusely, not accustomed to entertaining such bloodthirsty little thoughts of revenge. She gasped in shock as a new thought occurred to her --- she supposed she really shouldn't hate the wolf at all. If not for Kouga, she would not be walking along this windy beach with this tall, magnificent youkai at her side. Bizarre as the logic may be, had her village NOT been attacked by the wolves, she would have NEVER seen Sesshoumaru again. She suddenly imagined herself as a little girl arriving at that mighty old tree to bring him his daily scavenged --- and entirely refused --- meal only to find him gone. Yes, if not for the wolves, Sesshoumaru would have recovered from his injuries and returned to his travels, leaving her behind without even knowing her name.

She stopped suddenly and the youkai had to shorten his stride to keep from crashing into her. Sesshoumaru looked down in mild annoyance --- until he noticed Rin's sad and faraway look. Her complexion had become sallow and ashen again, and her hands were trembling. Maybe this was too much activity for one day.

"You are still pale," he murmured. "This is far enough. I think you should take more rest."

"What will you do?" she blurted, wondering if he intended to 'rest' with her.

"I wish to read through my Father's scrolls to see if there is anything further written on the Tenseiga. I wish to know more about this connection."

"Oh --- I see." Rin bit her lip, trying in vain to control her obvious look of disappointment. Of course, his greatest concerns lay in her connection to his youki! Was he hoping to learn how it could be removed? She had already reached the conclusion that if he knew about the consequences of his actions he would NOT have revived her all those years ago.

And now she had new reason wonder and doubt! If he hadn't been told about this 'bond' in the first place, would he ever have RETURNED for her at all? If she were just an 'ordinary' ningen girl, would she still be pining for him on Totosai's mountain?

Life was so much easier when she was just an ignorant child, only concerned with pretty flowers and stealing ripe melons from farmer's fields.

She turned, and slowly shuffled towards the winding path leading up to the sea-cliffs.

"Where are you going?" he asked brusquely, trailing at her heels.

"I am cold, my lord. I wish to go back."

"Wait for this Sesshoumaru to accompany you," he intoned somewhat sharply.

Rin looked up in surprise. She had a sinking suspicion he was really only following her to protect his power, not out of any genuine concern for her well-being.

"There is little that can harm me on the path from the beach to the shiro, my lord," she stated in a rather unfamiliar, slightly cross voice.

His amber eyes became impossible wide.

"Nevertheless, you WILL wait," he growled.

Sesshoumaru couldn't believe this --- HIS RIN was attempting to argue with him! It should have made him angry, but instead it only filled him with remorse and regret. He reached out and grabbed the girl by her tiny wrist, the action snapping her to a sudden halt. He opened his mouth to speak, but Rin's words cut through first.

"Sesshoumaru-sama, may I --- inquire about something?"

The taiyoukai blinked in surprise and drew in a deep breath. Up until now, their conversations had been flowing much more easily. Obviously, if she felt the need to ask his permission to speak again, she definitely had something meaningful on her mind. He nodded, bracing for the worst.

This time, quite unlike the morning in the forest, she did NOT go easy on him and her words filled him with apprehension.

"That night --- when you sent me away," she began, "those cruel things you said --- did you really mean them?"

He turned to regard the wind-swept landscape uncomfortably --- he HAD been dreading this after all.

"Yes," he answered slowly, fixing her with an emotionless look.

Rin felt as if her heart were shriveling in flames. She swayed, all her foolish hopes dashed with that one word. Her knees buckled and she dropped her basket, its contents spilling onto the weather beaten rocks.

Sesshoumaru grabbed the girl by the shoulders, pulling her against his body for support and bracing her upright.

"Gomen nasai," she whispered mildly, as she tried unsuccessfully to brush him away. "Rin is still clumsy and perhaps a bit weak from not having anything to eat for so long."

Sesshoumaru shook his head at her pathetic attempt to hide the real reason for her distress. He was beginning to realize that the girl would revert to her submissive, childhood speech pattern whenever she was trying to hide her true feelings from him.

"Rin, wait for this Sesshoumaru to finish," he admonished. "Yes --- at the time, I meant those words. But --- being away from you has taught me otherwise."

He cupped her chin and turned her face up to meet his. "Your companionship is something I have come to --- take pleasure in. More than that I cannot say."

Rin realized how much it must have pained him to make such an unusual and 'considerate' admission. But she couldn't let him stop there --- she needed some of this intense indecision and uncertainty to just go away.

"What will become of me?" she cried. "Where do I belong now?" She met his eyes, challenging him to answer her pleas.

Damn --- she looked so lost and forlorn. Sesshoumaru felt a stab of guilt, suddenly realizing that both Totosai and that pathetic wretch Inuyasha were right. He HAD been so utterly selfish to keep this child. In allowing her to remain at his side, he had isolated her from anyone else. Over these past eight years, he had left her with nothing to cast her affection upon --- nothing save himself. The taiyoukai felt a sudden moment of doubt --- was he using her natural feelings of gratitude and her loyal devotion to his own gain? Was he taking advantage of her misplaced, misguided affections? He suddenly realized he didn't care.

He did not lie --- she brought him pleasure, and he would no longer deny himself something that he wanted. He abruptly found himself staring intently at her trembling lips and he wondered now if they would taste as sweet as they looked.

His handsome, aristocratic face descended lower and lower, and Rin could count each and every fleck of darker ocher encircling his honey-colored eyes. She watched in fascination as those inhuman, slit pupils dilated in response to the burning glare of the sun. They fixed solely on her only for an instant, before peacefully drifting closed. Oh gods --- was he going to kiss her?

Sesshoumaru could sense a momentous, dramatic spike in her fear. Wait! Usually being this close to a demoness inspired lust, hunger, and burning desire --- not terror and tension! Any romantic notions he had died in a wave of rolling confusion and disgust.

Was this a normal 'human' reaction?! Or perhaps --- could it be a normal 'virgin' reaction? In the course of his long, long life, he had NEVER experienced either. Until Rin, the thought of mating a ningen had never crossed his mind. And every demoness he'd rutted with had been just as talented, knowledgeable and practiced as himself --- he'd never been someone's first! Panicked he was doing something VERY wrong, he merely pressed his forehead against hers.

"It's getting late," Rin whispered nervously, avoiding his eyes by directing her gaze over towards the churning sea.

He did not move, hoping she might learn to relax in his embrace. "So it is," he replied quietly, his words fanning across her lips and cheeks, as he tried to think of ways to help calm her. She still seemed to be so intrigued by his voice, his words. "You asked where you belong," he stated quietly, pushing some fly-away tendrils of her hair off her forehead. "You belong with this Sesshoumaru."

Her shoulders slumped in relief. "Then shall 'we' return home?" she whispered.

Though Rin still remained staring out at the dark waves, Sesshoumaru caught the bright, happy gleam as it suddenly returned to her hazel eyes.

Sesshoumaru scowled down at the scroll, briefly tempted to shred it into tiny pieces. There was nothing. Nothing about Tenseiga. Just more ramblings about finding something to care for --- something to protect with his whole heart. He was beginning to have the sneaking suspicion that Chichiue had been intentionally vague; perhaps by not leaving any word or explanation, he had hoped to trick him into this very situation. After all, it WAS the perfect way to discipline his most high and mighty, haughty, egotistical, over-confident eldest son --- even from beyond the grave. He thought of Chichiue smiling patiently at him and he buried his pounding head in his hands and massaged his aching temples.

He glanced fleetingly over at the girl that was the source of all his current aggravation and these peculiar new emotions. Rin had been strangely silent and giddy since he had uttered those kind, simple words on the beach. When they'd returned to the shiro together, she'd obediently lain down to rest, just as he'd instructed. The girl did not fall asleep, however, but merely stared up at the ceiling with an absurd grin --- the same damn absurd grin that she'd worn on that long ago day when he'd first spoken to her in the forest, in fact.

His eyes returned to travel over Rin's form at a more measured and leisurely pace. The girl lay across the rumpled blankets, still dressed in his outgrown haori. The material hung just above her knees, and her somewhat scandalously exposed legs were up in the air as she propped her bare feet casually on the wall. She idly fanned a cluster of pink azalea flowers in the air above her eyes and hummed that old familiar tune. He smiled to see her so trusting, sprawled comfortably and contentedly in his bed.

Sesshoumaru forced his gaze away to stare back at his Father's scroll in continued frustration --- maybe he was missing something? The words of that little song of hers kept popping into his mind to distract him and interrupt his thoughts. _Wait. The words._ He inclined his head to the side to listen closer.

The lyrics she was currently voicing were totally different from the ones he remembered --- with a puzzled look he realized Rin was cleverly improvising new words to her old song. The taiyoukai concentrated fully, his lips turning in an amused sulk when he made out the last of her witty phrases.

_Suna no ue, umi no soba_

_Tori no shita, sora no aosa_

_Sesshoumaru-sama, zutto kibishii_

_Nande ken to asondeiru?_

_Atashi wa mada hitori de matteiru yo_

_Sesshoumaru-sama, isshou ni neyou!_

What?! What the hell did she just say? 'Sesshoumara-sama always so serious'?! Always 'playing' with his swords?! And still leaving her to wait?!?

Rin was --- Rin was --- she was teasing him? He met her eyes and she cast him a shy wave. He had been pouring over the scroll for several hours now --- he imagined the little thing was bored out of her mind.

The taiyoukai removed his swords, pausing to lay the pair of them against the far wall. He loosened his robe and extinguished the lantern, struck by the sudden desire to join her. Rin looked up in surprise, not really expecting that her little ploy to catch his attention would achieve such successful and simultaneously terrifying results. She turned onto her side, and scooted over to allow him more room. To her great astonishment, he only reached out to pull her back and draw her tightly into his arms.

He rested his chin on the crown of her head, and absently traced a claw across a ragged old scar on her throat, still somewhat fascinated by the texture. "The wolves --- it must have been so terrifying, so painful for you," he whispered.

"Hmmm," she answered, a little self-conscious that he would think the markings were ugly. "No. At the time, I really didn't feel much of anything --- I was too bent on trying to escape, I suppose."

Sesshoumaru shifted, his words suddenly teasing against the delicate shell of her ear. "For such a little thing, you have an incredibly strong will."

Rin laughed quietly, basking in the warmth of his unexpected compliment and the amazing sensation of his soft breath against her skin. Her nervous titter of amusement was short-lived, however, and her eyelids fluttered in surprise as his large hand unexpectedly began to knead her shoulder. "A strong will doesn't help much when you are powerless to help those you care for," she answered modestly. "My father, mother, and older brother --- they're all gone. I couldn't do anything for them."

The taiyoukai sighed in sympathy, feeling slightly ashamed that he had never inquired about her past. He pulled her even closer against him. "What do you recall?" he asked soothingly.

"Our province was very poor. There was a drought and people were desperate to survive, I guess," she began composedly, still staring out at the wall. "Bandits came raiding our village one night. They took our grain, slaughtered our livestock. I remember we were all in the barn just trying to hide --- hoping they would leave. When they went to burn our home, my father and older brother raced out to try to stop them." Rin shook her head. "They were killed quickly."

She let out her breath slowly and continued. "My mother --- she yelled at me not to speak. She warned me to stay silent, to remain hiding in the straw. When I saw what the bandits did to her --- I couldn't make a sound anyway. It was so terrible."

"I didn't speak for months after that. The local villagers, I think they thought my mind was broken --- nobody wanted to take me in. I had no other kin to provide for me." The young woman's voice suddenly became lighter, and the demon could feel her heart begin to race.

"But then I found you --- and --- and you became my family." Her cheeks flared scarlet in mortification at her own silly, ineloquent words.

Rin felt his grip tighten again, and his entire body had suddenly become so stiff, so rigid, so tense. He released her suddenly to roll onto his back. "My lord?" she whispered frantically over her shoulder.

He remained eerily silent, and, for the first time, she turned to face him and meet his eyes in the darkness. Had she angered him somehow? He looked shaky, lost in a memory. Rin curled into his side and reached up to stroke his striped cheek, attempting to draw him back to the present. "My lord?" she prompted again.

"This Sesshoumaru had a family once too," he murmured. His eyes and voice seemed so distant now, so detached. Rin remembered Totosai's story of Sesshoumaru-sama's sad history. She felt horrible to have spoken so casually about her pain --- hadn't he suffered as well? Hadn't he lost his family in an equally gruesome manner?

The uncomfortable silence was suddenly broken by her master's deep voice. "Those I cared for," he began quietly, "were taken from me as well. One died right here --- killed by Ryukossei, an ancient youkai, and an enemy of my Father's." Rin's chest constricted painfully to hear his voice so mournful and despondent.

"I was young, not much bigger than you were when I first found you." He reached out to brush a few strands of hair away from her face tenderly. "There was little I could do." He closed his eyes, remembering the cruel taunts, the high-pitched screaming, and being crushed in the creature's merciless grasp ---

Rin's hands fisted gently in his long hair. "Would you --- tell me what happened, my lord?"

He eyed her warily, than nodded in agreement. "Ryukossei had long desired this domain. He had killed much of my mother's kin and thought his time to reign over the West was near at hand. When he learned that my honored parents were mated and that they had produced an heir, he knew all his struggles and power-mongering would soon be in vain. Chichiue's strength was legendary, and that cursed demon knew he could not stand against my father AND an equally powerfully son."

"He thought to destroy me while I was still young and weak --- while I was still easy prey for him --- and before that inevitable day when the three of us would drive him off together. Hahaue --- she could have escaped, but ---" The taiyoukai shook his head and his words trailed off.

"She fought him well," he stated proudly. "But in the end, it mattered little."

Rin swallowed nervously as he continued. "I remember being caught in those talons and very near to death. I was so broken and defeated that I wished that I could just fade into the Other World with her. Those jaws were stained with her blood and they moved to close around me --- and then I knew no more. That was when Chichiue finally returned. I do not know the full details of their combat. Ryukossei's claws had pierced me many times and I lay fevered for weeks."

"The years passed quickly, faster and faster. Father and I had nothing to say to one another. Then he found that --- that woman --- and sired my pathetic half-brother. I hated them. I hated him with them. I sometimes wonder if it was my urging and the guilt I laid upon him that prompted him to seek Ryukossei out when he returned to our lands again. I should have aided him in that fight, but --- but I didn't."

He paused, distracted by the sounds of the waves on the beach and Rin's still rapidly beating heart. "Anyway, Chichiue succumbed to his injuries, but not before sealing Ryukossei and avenging my mother. My powers had reached their present level and I longed to revive that vicious snake so I could tear him to pieces. But being sealed and stripped of his own jyaki seemed a fate worse than death. Pinned to that mountain, as helpless and feeble as Hahaue and I were before him."

"Of course, then that worthless pup, Inuyasha, had to release Ryukossei. He robbed this Sesshoumaru of watching his prolonged suffering and humiliation ---" he grated, eyes lighting with malice at the mention of his younger sibling.

He looked back at Rin with a sigh, shocked to see that tears were running down her face. He reached out carefully to brush a clinging drop of moisture from her eyelid. "Why are you crying?" he asked.

"I do not like to think of you in pain, my lord."

"Then stop those tears at once, for they hurt this Sesshoumaru," he chided.

If anything, the tears only came down harder after his declaration. "Please stop," he implored, so concerned for her feelings that he didn't even realize he was begging for something.

"I am sorry," he apologized without thinking --- the words just flowing automatically to pour forth in absolute sincerity. He gripped her tightly by the shoulders and pulled her into a rough embrace. "Come --- this is why we should not trouble ourselves with memories."

"No, my lord, don't you understand? I want you to tell me --- I want to know everything about you. I've wanted to know for so long," Rin murmured.

His eyes narrowed in surprise. "But why? Why are you grieving for those who are long dead? For those who have no connection to you?"

"I grieve because they meant something to YOU," she stated plainly. She gripped his shoulder tightly and buried her face in the crook of his neck while he desperately tried to absorb her strange words and emotions.

"Your mother, my lord --- please, tell me. What was she like?" she whispered against his throat. The taiyoukai sighed at the feeling of those lips brushing innocently across his skin.

"Intelligent, beautiful," Sesshoumaru replied. "Fearless, and confident --- but never boastful. So very brave --- she never backed down from anything." He was suddenly painfully aware that his flattering description could also be applied to the small, young woman in his arms.

Rin wriggled back to scrutinize his noble, handsome face. She could easily conjure up a vision of such a woman. In her mind's eye, she pictured a stunning, feminine version of her master with refined, delicate features and the same long, silver hair, fierce golden eyes and the emblem of the crescent moon.

Powerful, stately, beautiful.

Gods - what would such a demoness think of a creature as low-born and undignified as herself? She felt a little sick and ashamed.

"What is it?" Sesshoumaru asked, sensing her sudden reserve and pain.

"Nothing, it is nothing, my lord. Rin is fine." His eyes narrowed immediately at her choice of words. There she did it again! An obvious lie! He didn't want to see her like this --- not anymore.

Rin's long lashes fluttered closed, and she opened her mouth to speak again, hoping to lighten the topic of conversation with some silly, inane question. Before she could utter another word, however, Sesshoumaru suddenly closed the distance between them and brushed his lips softly across hers. Her eyes flew open at the strange sensation, her breath coming out in a shaky gasp. That --- that was her first kiss?! Sesshoumaru-sama had just kissed her? As quickly as she registered it, the feeling was over! It wasn't fair, she hadn't even had been prepared!

She reached up to touch her lips with trembling fingers, and met his intense gaze. Just when she thought she might have imagined the whole thing, he smiled back at her, his look equally bemused and mystified.

Sesshoumaru could smell the girl's fear, but now there was most definitely the scent of another reaction clamoring within her as well. A purely physical reaction.

That chaste kiss had been an impulse really. He had desired to feel her soft lips ever since the moment he had nearly greedily taken them down on water's edge. _No_, he corrected in his mind --- _he had wanted to kiss her for a much, much longer time than that_.

As much as he didn't want to admit it --- his ego HAD been slightly shaken by her frightened, negative response to his obvious advances this morning, and he had been curious to see if he could make her WANT him. The answer was an obvious, resounding YES.

The stunned look on her face right now made everything worth all of the doubt --- worth all of the wait. He reached out and clasped her hand tenderly, bringing her delicate fingers to his own lips, just to be certain.

Rin thought she might faint as he tenderly pressed a kiss to each one.

"Why do you do this?" she whispered, trying to ignore the unfamiliar growing tingle in her pit of her belly.

"Because this Sesshoumaru wanted to," the taiyoukai answered gently.

She couldn't form a coherent response --- the only thing that would come out was a soft whimper.

What the hell had he just done? That weak, pleading moan and those beseeching eyes were causing shivers to arc down his spine. _Fuck._ He needed to stop this NOW before it spun out of control. Somewhere inside, the youkai knew there were still too many unknowns --- too many questions both unasked and unanswered.

He ALSO knew that was her FIRST kiss. For some reason that simple fact alone brought him so much --- happiness? And, for some equally unfamiliar, unknown reason, since it was her first, he wanted to it to remain special --- pure. Her first caress should be innocent and sweet, even if it went against every instinct in his demon nature.

"Go to sleep," he ordered, wondering if HE could follow his own advice himself.

"H-hai, m-m-master," she replied unevenly. Just how in all the levels of hell could he POSSIBLY expect her to comply?!

Sesshoumaru cracked a gleaming eye and scowled at her halting words. "Do not call me that," he uttered.

"Hai --- my lor ---" Rin trailed off as both of his eyes opened to fix her with an even more displeased and reproachful look.

"What should I call you?" she queried.

He reached around her to draw her closer still, trailing his hands up and down her spine in a soft caress. "My name," he murmured simply.

Rin's cool hand came to rest over his heart, and he smiled into her hair.

The next few days flew by, with their exchanges remaining short, poignant and sweet. As the time quickly passed, however, their interactions rapidly became less reserved, reticent and formal.

Every evening, without a word of explanation, they would silently join one another in his great bed. Sometimes they would say nothing at all, simply content to lie in each other's arms in the darkness. Other nights, they spoke quietly about the past --- sometimes whispering until the light of dawn filled the sky. Rin had now become accustomed to facing him in the dark, curled under his arms; her small chest pressed tightly to his powerful form; her leg thrown comfortably over one of his. With the utmost care, the demon lord would tenderly run his clawed hands across her soft cheeks, up her slender arms, or down her arching back.

Drawn by his coaxing, the young woman would sometimes reach for him in return. Her touch was still cautious and careful, but as the nights drifted by, her hands became more confident, roaming over the strong planes of his face, his throat, and, of course, up along the edge of those graceful pointed ears. Sesshoumaru, it seemed, was equally intrigued with her tiny human ears as well, delighting in the discovery that she was rather ticklish there.

The young woman anxiously awaited her second kiss, but it never came. Maybe, she realized sadly, he had only offered that first one out of pity, not out of any real longing or attraction.

Another night was over; another sunrise came and went. Rin stared out over the gleaming ocean, watching as the crescent moon dipped under the horizon. Sesshoumaru, had risen early, as usual, and sat on the floor fastidiously mending the pommel of Tenseiga. With her newly acquired interest and knowledge of Totosai's craft, as well as her ever present desire to remain close by his side, the young woman slowly approached to inspect his work. As she stepped closer to the taiyoukai, however, something strange began to happen --- something began to buzz in her mind, filling her thoughts with whispered, mocking words.

She shook her head to be rid of the eerie droning noise. "Did you --- did you say something?" she asked in concern. Sesshoumaru looked up at her, surprised at the shrill, shaky tone of her voice. Rin's face had gone deathly white, and her lips had taken on sickly grey hue. Her hands shot to her ears with a shriek, her face contorting in a look of pure panic and horror. In the next instant, her soft brown eyes had rolled over white. "Sesshou ---"

"Rin!" he shouted, leaping from the floor, knocking the table aside in his haste to scramble to her side. As soon as he grabbed hold of her slight form, he shook the girl roughly, trying to keep her conscious as she convulsed. _What the hell!? What was happening?_ His panicked glance suddenly came to rest on Toukijin lying on the floor just a few feet away --- the sword was glowing, its terrible power flaring. With numb shock he realized the simple truth --- Rin --- or no human for that matter --- had never stood so close to the wicked sword while it was out of his charge and not controlled and contained at his side. He grabbed the hilt with one hand, his own youki forcing the evil aura back into the blade, while he simultaneously pulled the girl close to his chest with the other.

There was so much to worry about now --- had the sword recognize his youki within her too? Had it tried to consume her like it had Kaijinbo?

She gave a pained groan. It didn't matter that it was such a little sound --- he was just instantly relieved to hear her soft voice.

"Itaaaaaaai," Rin muttered dully. Sesshoumaru carried her to the bed and laid her down among the tangled blankets, turning to bring the now seemingly innocent sword to the other side of the room. As quickly as he'd left, he returned to her side. "What did it say to you?" he asked nervously.

"Say?" Rin repeated, feeling much better with every moment that passed. "I couldn't understand. The voices --- they said, they said I was nothing --- a parasite. They spoke of terrible things: death, power, torture, pain --- but it hurt too much to focus on anything in particular." She eyed the sword with revulsion and disgust. "Why – what does Toukijin say to you?"

"Nothing," he stated. 'Just as it should. I have not heard anything since I conquered it."

He ran his hand through his hair in exasperation. Over the past few days he had simply come to overlook the basic fact that she was human. And human --- he realized with a start, did not necessarily mean weak or frail. Most demons, nearly any demon, he recognized, would have also nearly succumbed to the sword's power as well. The taiyoukai was not ready to share his new profound, philosophical discovery. "You will be the death of this Sesshoumaru," he sighed.

Rin smiled, "Impossible. My lord is far too strong and clever."

"Not nearly strong enough or clever enough to keep you from finding trouble," he countered.

"I do not FIND trouble." She cast him a roguish grin.

"I stand corrected --- trouble finds you."

"Name one time," she challenged in feigned innocent.

"This Sesshoumaru can name hundreds," he stated, hardly daring to believe she was audacious enough to antagonize him, but somehow enjoying this ridiculous exchange all the same.

The corners of her lips turned down in an unmistakable pout. "I can too," she admitted, dropping her game with a small defeated sigh. "I am truly sorry for being such a nuisance but --- wait ---"

She jabbed him in the ribs with an accusing finger. "I can justify all of my actions and you must admit at least half of the 'dangerous situations' I got myself into were ENTIRELY Jaken-sama's fault!"

Sesshoumaru turned to hide his grin at her wry humor and clever banter. Yes, she and the small toad certainly did have a history of inviting disaster together. He was suddenly struck with a sobering thought and turned deadly serious again.

"The weapon you carry now --- Totosai maintains you tried to claim it after he implied you were helpless." He fixed her with his most disapproving glare. "Even though you were very aware it contained jyaki, you still sought to control it. You are no longer a child --- it was VERY foolish for you to allow your emotions to override your good sense and reason."

"Ahh, but isn't it equally foolish to live by reason alone. How lonely! How sad! You'd miss all the experiences and excitement," she contradicted with a gentle laugh.

"That old man filled your head with some ridiculous notions," he snorted inelegantly.

"No, my lord, these thoughts are my own."

He cocked his head to the side and his eyes narrowed as if he were seeing her for the first time. "You ARE a thoroughly strange and puzzling little --- thing," he stated with a frown.

Rin grinned brightly. The comment was stated with no malice and, as always, she found his thoroughly analytical mind, rigidly-ordered thought process, and dry delivery to be hysterically intriguing. She was very proud of the fact that she seemed to be the only creature capable of causing him reason to pause --- the only creature capable of throwing him off balance.

She turned to look at her naginata, resting across the room with the now dormant Toukijin. "Please --- everything was fine! I survived it!"

"It was not nearly so --- Totosai said you were nearly killed!" he scolded.

"Well, I'll admit things weren't exactly going in my favor, but then I touched YOUR youki and ---"

"Be silent --- I know what happened next," he cut her off, "I FELT it."

Rin paused, and threw him an embarrassed, contrite look.

"Ohhh. Ojii-sama told me as much, but I didn't quite believe him. Gomen ne," she apologized ruefully.

She sat up in bed, still feeling slightly dizzy. Her eyes widened, as she recalled the strangely warm feeling of when she had touched his power all those weeks ago --- the tenderness, the welcoming. Did he experience it as something similar? "What was it like when you 'felt' me?" she asked inquisitively. "It did not hurt you?"

He stared back at her incredulously. Once again, she was only concerned with HIS well-being and feelings rather than her own.

"What did it feel like?" he echoed carefully. "It was strange --- invasive, persistent, cold. But --- but not so much at first."

"What was it like?" she insisted again.

Her breath caught as he moved onto the bed to slowly kneel before her.

"It was like this," he murmured. Sesshoumaru reached out to cup her soft cheek for the slightest of moments before gradually running his hand to tangle in the long sable hair at her nape. The fingers of his other hand trailed gently across her slightly parted lips, and down along the pale column of her throat. He slowly traced the delicate curve of her collar bone, teasing idly, boldly edging his fingers under the hem of her robe to splay over her heart.

"What are you doing?" she breathed.

"Shhhh. Do you not like it?"

"Yes, I mean --- no. My lor--- Sesshoumaru-sama."

She let out a shaky moan. "I mean --- can it please be like the other night? Are you ever going to kiss me again?"

"Many times," he answered with a small smile, fisting his hand roughly in fabric of her robe to pull her closer.

"Ureshii yo," she murmured, closing her eyes and anxiously waiting for his soft lips to capture hers again.

Sesshoumaru suddenly growled and pushed her away. Rin was already unbalanced and collapsed rather awkwardly into the soft covers. Her wide eyes blinked in confusion. _No!_ _What had she done wrong?_

"S-Sesshoumaru?" she stammered, still not particularly comfortable with just referring to him name, not title. "What is it?"

She did not have to wait for him to deliver the answer to her query. Within seconds a large shadow soared overhead and she could hear the telling rumble of Aun and followed by Jaken's high pitched, excited squawking.

She gasped, gathering her rumpled clothing more tightly about her frame. Sesshoumaru threw her a pained, apologetic look. She saw his power build for an instant and then he slowly faded from her vision.

"Damnit!" she hissed, wishing she had such powers as well. She raced from the room to find her master and meet her returning companions.

"This Jaken has returned!" came a loud echoing call from the sky. Rin rushed forward curiously to where Sesshoumaru stood waiting in the courtyard. Within seconds, Aun and the small toad demon had touched down on the ground with a deafening thud. She observed that the dragon was heavily burdened and laden with large panniers and great bundles of goods. _What?_

"Look!" Jaken cried, hopping excitedly from Aun's back to cast a fawning glance up at the taiyoukai. "Everything as instructed, Master!" He bowed to Sesshoumaru and reached up to pull a silken tassel on Aun's harness, spilling the contents of an overflowing pack onto the stones of the courtyard. Rin's breath caught at the array of rich fabrics and twinkling chains of pearls. There were layers and layers of beautiful robes with cloth in the most exquisite colors.

But more than that, there were fine foods, including mandarin oranges, pears, and sticky sweet rice cakes. There were delicate brushes for writing, rolls of thin parchment, and large tablets of ink. With a grin she realized there were a few musicals instruments as well, including a shamisen, gekkin, and a shakuhachi. There were brand new sandals (sure to be more comfortable and much quieter than those annoying geta!), and several jars of exotic perfumes --- more presents then she could even count.

The taiyoukai stared down smugly. He might actually owe Jaken some praise in return this time --- he couldn't have selected better.

Rin was scrambling gleefully through the piles, her expression alight with absolute happiness, bliss, and merriment.

"Sesshoumaru?" she breathed, fixing the handsome youkai with a look as equally fawning as Jaken's. Upon hearing her address their master so disrespectfully, the little toad threw Rin a look of unmatched horror. The young woman caught his utterly panicked glance and quickly amended her words.

"Sesshoumaru-sama? My lord? Is this --- mine?" She gasped in disbelief.

The tall youkai had to fight to contain his grin. "This Sesshoumaru suspects you would be happier surrounded by flowers or fireflies --- but, it is not the season for providing those," he murmured. "Accept these instead."

Rin look awed and overwhelmed, her hands fisted around many yards of fine silk as if she were tearing into a blossom-filled meadow. Jaken looked back and forth between the girl and his master, appearing as though he might faint at any moment.

Never in her life did Rin imagine she would possess such fine goods. These dresses, these jewels --- they were all fit for a hime. She eyed Jaken reproachfully, wondering what less than savory methods he had used to get his grubby little fingers on these wares. She shook her head at images of him gleefully driving off scores of foot soldiers and screaming merchants to commandeer their caravans. There would doubtlessly be a few noble ladies in the province whose shipments and convoys had been raided.

Jaken, meanwhile, didn't understand what was going on at all. Sesshoumaru-sama was not acting like himself --- in fact, this present mood of his was even more difficult to understand than the darkness he had fallen into after he had left Rin with his pitiful half-brother. If he didn't know any better he would venture to guess that the taiyoukai was staring at the little ningen girl with a look of --- longing?

Fearing his master might snap out of this bizarre, peaceful mood at any moment, Jaken decided to continue to show just HOW well he had followed his lordship's instructions ---

"And look! Look! See here!" the toad piped as he moved to empty the contents of another pack. "Bedding! Red --- an audacious color to be sure, but so like those flowers you're so damn fond of, yase ko!" he chortled at Rin, poking her in the belly with a claw. "See --- just as you commanded, Sesshoumaru-sama! Now this lazy girl can lounge on fine pillows in her own room all day long!" The toad waited gleefully for Rin to hurl back a teasing insult of her own.

But no jokes, no sarcastic little quips were uttered in retaliation.

Rin's smile had effectively died the moment she first cast her eyes on the contents of this final pack. New blankets, new bedding --- all they meant was that she would not be invited to return to Sesshoumaru's room. She had no more excuses to remain curled up with her master at night. There were would be no more ways to justify holding one another in the dark.

She threw the taiyoukai a half-panicked, half-mournful look. This strange little fairy-tale fantasy was over.

Sesshoumaru looked equally aghast._ How could he have known?_ Instead of bringing her joy, his gifts had ruined everything.

And not just for her, he realized. He thought of those gentle eyes staring back at him in the fading light, and her increasingly bold touches when they held each other in the darkness ---

And, of course, he thought of the way she had just looked mere moments ago in his bedchamber. How she had leaned in passionately when he had sought to capture her lips in what he hoped would be a bolder, much more thorough kiss.

This was a disaster. How could he let things return to the way they were before? His first completely selfless actions and look at the fucking results!

In so many ways, this paralleled his experience on the battle-field with Naraku: he had to make a decision. He had to choose Rin's fate --- and his own.

Before he could even form a thought, much less a sentence, he was suddenly interrupted by a peal of over-bright, false feminine laughter.

"Thank you, Jaken-sama," the young woman uttered warmly. "These gifts are all so lovely. Rin will take them away at once."

That telling choice of words once more --- she was most definitely upset and trying to conceal her pain. Sesshoumaru took a sudden step forward to stop the young woman, then paused in indecision. _Was he ready to admit to the world that he wanted her? _He watched her walk away, feeling that strange pressure build unbearably within his chest. When the hell was he going to feel like his old self again? _Wait._ Did he even really want to feel like his old self again?

"Jaken," he ordered quietly. "Go with her."

The toad stumbled forward, pausing to look back at the taiyoukai, confused by the profound sorrow and despair on his master's usually bland face.

Jaken hurried after the little ningen girl, following her stealthily back to her bedchamber. He was surprised to find Rin sobbing --- the whole room reeked with that distinctive, wholly unpleasant salty odor. He had not seen her emotions so out of control since she was small. With a fond and wistful grin, the toad recalled her bravery and the tears she'd shed when she thought he was dying long ago.

_This was too damn bizarre! _He pushed his un-demonlike sentiments aside and confronted her brusquely.

"What the hell is going on?" Jaken demanded, claws clicking noisily as he scampered across the rich wooden floor.

Rin looked up at the sudden intrusion with a scowl. "Nothing, Jaken-sama. Go away," the girl pouted. "I am just tired and confused. I mean, ummm --- I am very overwhelmed by all these undeserved gifts." She laughed politely.

Jaken regarded her with deep suspicion --- this girl was a pathetic liar. Never the less, he played along willingly with her game. "It is my understanding that when women of your --- kind --- get like --- like this, they do things to make themselves at least FEEL pretty," he grumbled.

"What kind of things?'" Rin sniffled. She shifted closer, slightly intrigued in spite of herself.

"How should this Jaken know!?" the toad squeaked. "You all look the same to me --- with your flat pink faces, little eyes, and those pointy noses! Disgusting!"

Rin looked rather disappointed.

Jaken threw his hands in the air. "Stop your pouting!" he screeched. "I said they DO things to make them feel pretty! Even if I don't know what that means --- just look at all the pretty --- stuff --- this Jaken has returned with!" He stomped on a lovely kimono lying on the floor for emphasis. "You're clever! TOO CLEVER! I'm sure you can think of something!"

Rin didn't move.

"Here take this," he grated, reaching down to scoop up a few furisode and koromo, shoving great armloads of the gowns into her arms. "This noble servant went through a lot of trouble to procure them for YOU at the request our great Master. The least YOU can do is put these on and show your gratitude."

"But I do not know how to wear such garments," she muttered miserably.

Jaken was rapidly losing what little patience he had. With an angry huff, he kicked Rin soundly in the shins, feeling smugly satisfied at her sharp, resounding yelp. He pointed condemningly at her robe. "Well, first things first, HUMAN --- get out of that thing! Just what the HELL is that anyway?"

"What?" she grated, rubbing at her still stinging leg. "It's Seshoumaru-sama's old haori, I think? From when he was younger, I suppose."

"Well, for pity's sake, take it off! I can't stand the sight of those skinny, stringy legs of yours!" Jaken sneered.

"Oh – SHUT UP, you tiny little monster!" Rin shouted in defense, her spirit finally returning in response to the youkai's insults.

Jaken's beaky little mouth screwed into a determined grin. _Good --- the girl was finally fighting back._ "And that face of yours," he continued to jeer. "Clean THAT up --- you look like a drowned lizard!"

"Better to look like a drowned lizard than a WARTY TOAD!" Rin shrieked down at him, tramping off behind the changing screen to hastily shed her garments.

"By all the gods of hell --- you infuriate and annoy me!" Jaken ranted.

Rin popped her head over the barrier with an angry expression and stuck her tongue out at the toad. Jaken smiled secretly. He couldn't help but notice that the girl had most definitely wiped at her eyes while concealed behind the screen.

The small youkai could tell the young human was most definitely at the end of her patience. "Don't think you're so smart, Jaken-sama! I know what you're doing!" Rin shouted over her shoulder. "I'm doing this because I WANT TO --- not because of you!" Jaken wisely said nothing further to provoke her, but merely continued to supply layers of fine silk clothing around the panels placing them in her outstretched, waiting hand.

When Rin finally stepped out from behind the screen he almost didn't recognize her. If he were human, he supposed he might have said she was beautiful. Whatever the case, this woman standing before him now was a far cry from the noisy little girl he had known. The little girl whose knees were always filthy. The little girl whose hands were always filled with an assortment of ridiculous weeds.

"Are you sure it's supposed to look like this, Jaken-sama?" Rin scowled. The sleeves hung down so low she couldn't even find her own hands and with the five layers of uchiki she couldn't even bend!

"Of course, it is!" the toad snapped, turning away from her. "Think of Kagura!"

"I'd really rather not," Rin countered, unable to keep some of her distaste from creeping into her voice.

"Well --- me neither!" Jaken stated airily in total agreement. "But is this not similar to the style of robes she wears!?"

With a look of surprise, Rin realized the little demon was right. Her mouth snapped shut, her next stinging retort forgotten.

Several more moments of utterly aggravating pinching, prodding and poking passed, as together they inexpertly adjusted this finest gown over her small frame.

Finally, Rin stood dressed and resplendent in an elegant ivory furisode. Her wide, starched obi was a light sage, and dazzlingly embroidered with a pattern that looked like the graceful leaves of the hinoki tree. The many layers of sheer uchiki she wore underneath were of progressively darkening shades of rose, beginning with the palest pink and ending with the deepest plum. Jaken impatiently tugged twin trailing hikigoshi of darkest green into proper position behind her.

"Are those things supposed to hang off like that?" Rin murmured in uncertainty, gesturing down at the dragging fabric.

"I think so," Jaken muttered in a rather unconfident, extremely dubious tone.

"Then how do I keep from tripping?" she inquired with genuine panic and concern.

Jaken sighed in weary exasperation, "Ningen, you exhaust me. You'll have to figure that out for yourself."

The young woman bit her lip --- this was so bizarre. It was one thing to play "grown-up" when she was alone in the dark of Totosai's cave, but now ---

But now she actually looked the part.

"What do you think?" she queried hesitantly, spinning in a slow circle.

The toad did not answer, but smiled somewhat. He suddenly remembered something.

"Oh!" he cried. "This Jaken had almost forgotten. He reached in his billowing sleeve to pull out a small parcel. "Look, Sesshoumaru-sama requested this item specifically for you."

"What is it?" Rin whispered, bending to her knees with some difficulty. She inclined her head for a closer look as the youkai continued to unwrap the small packet.

She gasped as Jaken dropped something cold into her palms. Two dainty, matching combs for her hair glittered brightly in the circle of her hands. Lovely and finely crafted from shining silver, they were complete with curving chains of freshwater pearls that spiraled down stylishly from the hammered metal.

"Sugoi," she breathed, hardly daring to touch such a gift. Never in her life had she owned jewelry --- her only adornments thus far had been flowers.

"Jaken-sama," she whispered. "Arigatou."

The toad merely rolled his beady eyes and headed for the door. "It is not this Jaken who you should be thanking, musume!" he stated, turning to disappear down the hallway.

I really love the long reviews and hearing your opinions! Please keep them coming! Definitely makes hanging out around the computer worth it!

Yes, I know this chapter was way too warm and fuzzy: Kouga as the frickin' "old woman who lived in the shoe", Rin singing and doing her best "Pretty Woman" impersonation, and Jaken standing in for Doctor Phil. And of course, Sesshoumaru's still too damn confused to do anything about ANYTHING!

AND THANK YOU AGAIN NOTOES!!!!

Asian Cherries: thank you for the way too kind compliment!

InuyashaPrincess 17: yeah! Sorry, I combined a few chapters! Whoops!

Bad Kittie: a very cool online name! Thank you --- I'm glad you're enjoying so far!

Antisocial Mint: Yep, the same bed thing was too damn cute to pass up!

Kagura-Yasha: Thank you! Adorability shall be my new very awesome word o' the day!

Madartiste: argh, did I spell that right! Nice to hear from you again!

Kumag: THANK YOU, I know, I know --- I have been dragging this out a bit!

Lynx9: HI AGAIN! Sorry about those cliffies --- they're just so fun and evil!

yase ookami: wimpy wolf; Inuyasha's standard term of, ahem, affection for Kouga.

hie: millet

hoshi-ii: rice that's been steamed, then dried

goma: sesame seeds

noshiume: a confection made of dry plums

tokkuri: earthenware jar

asari: clams

chidori: plovers

Kabutgani: horseshoe crab

Ureshii yo: I'm glad!

uchiki: colored, stacked underrobes; think all the layers you see Inuyasha's mother, Izayoi, wearing!

Yase ko: skinny kid!

Hinoki: cypress

furisode: long sleeve robe

hikigoshi: very thin train of silk

sugoi: amazing, great

musume: very, very insulting form of little girl! Yep, just Jaken being a tad sarcastic!

_Suna no ue, umi no soba_

Above the sand, near to the ocean

_Tori no shita, sora no aosa_

Below the birds, the blueness of the sky

_Sesshoumaru-sama, zutto kibishii_

Sesshoumaru-sama, always so serious!

_Nande ken to asondeiru?_

Why are you playing with those swords?

_Atashi wa mada hitori de matteiru yo_

I'm still waiting by myself

_Sesshoumaru-sama, isshou ni neyou!_

Sesshoumaru-sama, let's rest together!

Yes –it makes no sense but neither does Rin's current song! At least the syllables match! What can I say I'm a dork --- this whole chapter was amazingly SAPPY!


	17. Chapter 16

Arghh! So sorry about the **LONG** delay! Summer work schedule is upon me and, like I said before, I'll be out on the water for days at a time! Had this stupid thing finished and scribbled all over a notebook --- obviously no computers on a boat! Anyway, figured I'd just get this out as fast as I can --- sorry I didn't take time to respond to reviews this time, but BELIEVE me, I REALLY, REALLY appreciate them ALL. It's SO nice to hear what you guys think!  
  
But maybe you'll all be **LESS **mad at me if I mentioned there's some very preliminary naughtiness towards the end of this chapter?!  
  
Anyway, please don't hold your breath for the next mini-installment. I've written myself into a tight spot where obviously it appears that a bit o' romance is about to occur and as I've never put anything like that on 'paper' --- **OYE**. So I'm sure I'll be angsting over what sounds right. Hmmm. What to do?  
  
Guess I'll shut up now!  
  
**THANK YOU NOTOES** (So glad everything's okay! No – thank you for YOUR support!) **AND MANON LE CHAT** (I know that 'out-of-character-leap thing' is really a pain! _Mr. Killing Life Cycle in the striptease_ --- ha, ha!)!!!

* * *

Chapter 16: Kettei

* * *

As soon as Rin had marched somberly away with a still rather perplexed Jaken trailing at her heels, Sesshoumaru felt the sudden urge to abandon the shiro again.  
  
The taiyoukai desperately needed time alone with his thoughts. He NEEDED to come up with a solution to this one momentous, looming, and utterly life- altering decision.  
  
He needed to make the choice that he could no longer afford to avoid ---  
  
He simply had to settle Rin's fate once and for all. Right now. Today.  
  
The wavering and hesitancy had dragged on long enough, and, for all their sakes, he had to pronounce some sort of judgment. This whole damn experience had been entirely maddening --- not to mention completely at odds with the very nature of his character.  
  
He had NEVER been the type to allow anything to provoke him for so long. If something caused him irritation, if something defied him or stood in the way of his plans --- **IT DIED**, plain and simple. In all his long life, in fact, there only seemed to be three creatures that had managed to remain exceptions to this one rule: Rin herself, of course; the foul, cowardly Naraku; and Inuyasha --- but that was merely because he simply hadn't gotten around to killing the half-breed yet, he amended quickly.  
  
Once again, his instincts clamored for violent exploits and the diversion of battle. But it would not be that straightforward or easy this time. The only thing he could pick on HERE was Jaken, and he wasn't in the mood, especially considering the toad's recent triumph in carrying out his orders.  
  
But the taiyoukai was equally certain he would find no worthy opponent to ease his building aggression on the plains of the Western Lands either --- he had been quite thorough and merciless when he had scoured his domain for possible threats a month ago. No, there would be no distractions or delays this time, and he would have to work through this alone.  
  
Well, maybe not entirely alone.  
  
With long, purposeful strides, he made his way swiftly to the large outbuilding that served as Aun's stable, scowling as he marched through the large double doors.  
  
At the unexpected sight of Sesshoumaru, the weary dragon bolted instantly back to his feet, seeming just as confounded and confused at his master's behavior as Jaken had been a moment before.  
  
The taiyoukai murmured a soft greeting in a small attempt to calm him, and turned hurriedly to reach for the creature's matching bridles.  
  
The dragon's exhaustion was forgotten instantly, and he could hardly stop dancing around the wide stable corridor as the taiyoukai struggled unsuccessfully to outfit him back into his tack.  
  
Growling in annoyance, Sesshoumaru lowered the bridles to rub absently at the creature's scaly withers. It wasn't long until those twin heads drooped in sheer bliss, and Aun made ridiculous grimaces of pure delight as his master's strong fingers instantly sought out and found all of his favorite itch spots. The beast settled into a peaceful stupor, his long tail lashing in happiness.  
  
With a sharp pang of guilt and remorse, Sesshoumaru made a mental note to seek the poor animal out more often. It had been far too long since he had lavished this manner of undivided attention on the dragon himself. Over the years, Rin had come to assume primary responsibility for Aun's care, and, in the course of her absence over the past few months, he had done nothing to ease his mount's obvious boredom and loneliness.  
  
By the time he finally adjusted the braided leather headstall behind the last pair of Aun's tufted ears, the beast was trembling with equal measures of enthusiasm and great impatience. The two individual heads bared their needle-like teeth and snapped at one another in their jealously to secure their master's entire attention.  
  
Sesshoumaru shook his head at their bizarre antics, and reached back to grasp the richly detailed saddle and breastplate next. He paused in momentary indecision and then realized he needn't bother with it at all. The taiyoukai was in far too impatient of a mood, and had no desire to deal with the many cinches and girths, or the annoying, constant flap and noise of the trailing saddle skirts. He didn't really need those cumbersome trappings anyway.  
  
In one smooth, fluid motion, he was astride Aun's russet-scaled back. The dragon needed no further urging at all, and lumbered through the wide stable doors, scrambling to take to the sky.  
  
Aun loped steadily through the air, the many fittings and buckles of his bridles jingling faintly. The soft silk of the reins and long tendrils of the taiyoukai's silvery hair whipped back in the rushing wind, and Sesshoumaru sighed as a familiar rush of adrenaline assailed him at once.  
  
He had been thinking about this for days now, after all. All those hushed talks with Rin in the tranquil, quiet hours of early dawn had rekindled some of his old boyhood memories. Memories of just how easy and carefree life had been all those hundreds of years ago ---  
  
His life, or rather, how his life had been back in a time when all that had driven his actions was a love of adventure and exploration --- not the lust for power and control that prevailed so deeply and weighed so heavily on him these days.  
  
Aun let out a deep, contented rumble, and Sesshoumaru gave him a fond slap on the shoulder, suddenly recalling how the dragon had been given to him --- an incredible gift, presented in an even MORE incredible show of faith from his esteemed father.  
  
He had been no more than a pup when he had taken the powerful creature into his care. Tending to and taming the unique, unusual beast had been his first real test of responsibility, and his first chance to prove himself in the eyes of his honored parents. The countless hours spent on Aun's back had given him his first taste of independence, and the dragon's great speed had allowed him to accompany Chichiue and Hahaue as they swiftly glided along the borders in their patrols.  
  
Still rather pleased that he had so dutifully met their expectations and had not disappointed their deep confidence and trust, he allowed himself a small smile now. He could remember parading Aun proudly under their window, showing off the creature's gleaming hide and meek behavior, as he demanded a chance to spend a few days away from the shiro touring and guarding the lands by himself. Sesshoumaru scowled at the callow foolishness of his youth, recalling his carefully rehearsed arguments and his rather undignified pleading.  
  
_Gods, he had always been a rather overly proud, overly serious, and overly haughty thing, hadn't he?_ Always trying to play sentinel and protector over the West despite being far too young, naive and relatively powerless. With a clipped laugh, the taiyoukai realized that he would never allow a pup of his own to go wandering off so immature, prideful and inexperienced as he had once been.  
  
Aun's ears pricked back in surprise at Sesshoumaru's small chuckle. The creature perceived the demon lord's unusually light temper and strangely high spirits, and his twin muzzles simultaneously released identical snorts of mischief. Without warning, the playful dragon reared up and dove wildly through the sky, seeking to provide his master with enough excitement to suit his present mood.  
  
Sesshoumaru merely smirked sarcastically at his mount's clear and obvious challenge --- Aun hadn't been able to throw him since he was a mere boy. He reacted to the dragon's blatant test of his skills with his usual bored indifference, simply gripping tighter with his knees, daring the creature to try to unbalance him.  
  
Several invigorating moments later, after granting him an exhilarating, twisting race along the breakers (and a bucking headlong-rush that careened dangerously close to the cliffs), Aun settled back down with a whining grumble of admitted defeat.  
  
Sesshoumaru remained unruffled and unfazed, and smugly offered the dragon another fond slap for his trouble and efforts. Together, the pair glided along the shore for awhile, mostly just to regain their breaths. When they reached the very end of the long, white beach, they spiraled easily upward along the sheer rock face and out over the rolling dunes.  
  
The taiyoukai guided his mount further west, cutting swiftly across the now snow-scattered meadows. It had been forever since he had just simply traveled the borders of his own lands for the sheer pleasure of it. He stared down and surveyed the all-too-familiar landscape, quietly taking in fragments of the majestic scenery all around him. His lands --- everything stretching from the sea to the lonely purple mountains looming in the distance.  
  
He urged Aun forward again with a click of his tongue, setting the creature circling faster through the sky.  
  
Below him, the entire territory was teeming with wildlife. Plump, flighty hares, shuffling boars and sleek red deer all crept timidly along the edges of the fields, seeking to fatten up before the first deep lingering cold of winter finally arrived.  
  
Though he could tell another storm was fast approaching, at the moment everything was perfect --- the sun was bright, the sky was that keen azure that could only be seen on these crisp fall days, and the wind whistled briskly through the cypress trees. Despite having traveled a fair distance, his sensitive ears could still make out the gulls calling raucously from the beach in noisy crescendo, and he suddenly wondered what silly topic Rin and Jaken were doubtlessly arguing about at this very moment.  
  
He didn't have long to ponder on those thoughts, however, as a pair of fat does made the fatal mistake of racing across his path. Within seconds, he was off Aun's back, instinctively streaking after them in feral pursuit.  
  
With a quick snap of his wrist and one crack of his whip, it was all over -- - both animals were brought down instantly, even before they had the slightest chance to perceive that danger and death were lurking silently above them. The demon felt his heart race in excitement --- he had forgotten how much fun it was to simply hunt game, rather than track down and struggle with bitter adversaries. Sesshoumaru swiftly gutted the deer and threw the unfortunate animals hastily over Aun's shoulder. Cleaning and butchering the carcasses was a menial task he would reserve for Jaken.  
  
His golden eyes gleamed as he cast an appreciative glance over his kill; Rin would most certainly be equally pleased with his prowess. No doubt she was tired of eating all those damn dried, flavorless grains at the shiro.  
  
The taiyoukai chose to walk silently at Aun's side now. Together they crested the summit of a steep hill, and stared out over the vast plains, surrounded on two sides by forests as far as the eye could see. Sesshoumaru studied the distant, stretching terrain as the rather unconcerned dragon bent his heads to nibble at a tuft of sedges.  
  
His thoughts turned to Rin yet again, and he suddenly found himself wishing he had invited the girl. A faint feeling of pride built inside him as he realized she'd no doubt be just as awed with this incredible view as he was. No more than a second later those peaceful thoughts were chased away by a small pang of guilt --- yes, he SHOULD have invited Rin. Despite lavishing the girl with presents, he HAD been rather rude and dismissive of her in front of Jaken.  
  
He growled. It was time to get this over with. It was time to grudgingly admit the truth.  
  
He wanted the girl to remain with him, yes, but some memories were too deeply rooted inside him. He had carried far too many prejudices and burdens for so many long centuries now, and perhaps no amount of reconsideration would change them. He always held displays of emotion in contempt --- but --- but --- whatever emotion he was building for Rin was different, and not so easily named.  
  
Or maybe it was easy to name, and he just didn't care to accept it? Was this --- love?  
  
The great youkai couldn't be sure, and shuddered reflexively at the very mention of that awful word. He had never quite imagined such a disastrous feeling or emotion wresting control of his ordered and logical mind. But if what he was currently feeling WAS love --- was it really such a horrible disaster after all?  
  
Both Chichiue and, much as he hated to admit it, that pathetic whelp Inuyasha had become stronger as a result of their strange devotion to their human women. They had become more focused, more powerful only after they had pledged their lives and souls to protecting the life of another.  
  
Unconsciously, he reached out to stroke the too-pale skin of his still slightly-aching left arm. Hadn't he born witness to that fact himself? Inuyasha had most definitely only been able to defeat him all those years ago because he had been fighting to save the life of that wretched, simpering, ridiculous little human miko in Father's tomb.  
  
_Fucking miko.  
_  
He sullenly returned to focusing on his father and half-brother again, forcing himself to remember that their great loves also brought about their ultimate disgrace --- and their eventual fall.  
  
True, Inuyasha's current fate remained to be seen, but his one love, _his first love_, had ended in a tragic catastrophe. What if a similar doom were to happen between himself and Rin? He had countless enemies, and she had been used against him many times in the past. He bristled angrily, suddenly remembering her as a little girl struggling helplessly in the clutches of Suikotsu, with those wicked blades pressed into her throat --- her shaky, pleading cries for him to be careful as Jakotsu attempted to herd him past Hakureizan's holy barrier ---  
  
He tore at the soft ground, remembering how it had been equally gratifying to plunge his claws into that swaggering, strutting okama's chest.  
  
As quickly as he settled on the pleasing memory of maiming one human, another thought interrupted to nag at his conscience. What if he claimed Rin only to discover that he couldn't let go of his hate for her kind --- _what if they were too damn different after all?_ Could he stand her accusing, condemning eyes focused upon him, full of the same emptiness and loathing as that dead woman Kikyo held for his half-brother?  
  
_Condemning? Accusing?_ Could _HIS_ little Rin ever hate him? The girl loved him already, of that fact he was sure. He did not need to hear her words --- one only had to look in her eyes to see the truth.  
  
But there was so much more to Rin, and he realized he would be sitting upon this hill all night if he tried to summarize every one of her appealing qualities. How could he ever let anything --- even his disdain of humankind --- blind him to her charms?  
  
Despite this new connection between them, despite this tie to his youki, the fact remained that she was still merely human. _Merely human? Somewhat human?_ Just what the hell was she now --- he was so confused.  
  
And yet it was simple --- some accident of fate had put them together and now --- and now he just couldn't be without her.  
  
_**But why?  
**_  
Rin had truly come to mean so much to him --- she had become a necessary, integral part of his life, though whether or not that was a favorable development still remained to be seen.  
  
Longing for something --- someone --- against all reason and pride --- what WAS that? Please don't call it '_love_' again, he scoffed miserably.  
  
With another shudder, he suddenly remembered Hahaue's death. Her selfless act of sacrifice.  
  
Maybe --- maybe love did not have to mean weak, pathetic or cloyingly sweet. Perhaps it merely meant caring about another's life more than your own? He shifted uncomfortably. Weren't those Father's very same words, now reached as a conclusion in his own mind?  
  
He truly was a fool.  
  
Sesshoumaru sighed. By the time the moon rose, one way or another, he would have his answer.

* * *

Kagura's breath caught as she stared nervously down a steep, spiraling staircase. Her ruby eyes narrowed in suspicion, and she shot Kanna a scathing look.  
  
"You must be joking, right?" she hissed, gesturing into the sinister depths. "You can't honestly expect me to be stupid enough to go down there!"  
  
Kanna did not reply, but merely shrugged her shoulders and continued to pace slowly down the crumbling, ancient steps.  
  
Feeling more than a little sick, Kagura paused nervously. The foul smell of death and decay was all around her, and the air was unnaturally still and stiflingly hot. That black, forbidding staircase seemed to go on for miles, as if it was a pathway that led straight down to the deepest pit of hell. With everything she knew about her evil master --- with all she knew about Naraku's black schemes and even blacker heart --- she wouldn't be surprised if it WAS hell that truly awaited her at the bottom.  
  
She bit her lip in indecision. She had come this far, she reasoned. If her master was presently holed up here, she couldn't turn back now.  
  
Steeling herself for the worst, Kagura slowly proceeded behind her smaller 'sibling', careful to place her feet only where Kanna had already tread. She had to abandon that cautious plan rather quickly, however, for when she looked too far below, she simply became too damn dizzy and disoriented. The wind-witch couldn't help but notice that the stairs were shifting somehow. It was barely perceptible; they weren't exactly moving really --- it was more like a melting or a fading.  
  
And then there were the bleak, shadowy doors --- she didn't want to look at them either. Every once in awhile, one would appear suddenly to branch off of the cool rock wall, just beckoning to be opened and explored. Some seemed to offer the promise of escape. With others, there seemed little doubt that only death awaited on the other side.  
  
She had to stop watching Kanna's progress altogether, and instead concentrated solely on her own toes. Kagura forced herself to proceed downward, pressing her fingers to her belly to control her raging nausea.  
  
Finally, after what seemed like hours, they reached the base of the steps, and the demoness found herself in an empty, vaulted and completely freezing cavern. She stared back up at the staircase to try and note her bearings should she have to flee. With a gasp of alarm, she realized it was gone ---- and in its place there was now a seemingly endless hallway. _How the hell would she get out of here if everything kept changing and shifting?  
_  
"Kanna --- is this --- are **you **doing this?" Kagura spat uneasily.  
  
There was a small pause before the pallid creature breathily responded, "This is _Nothing_, no more than a _Void_. This is my home."  
  
The smell of death was even more pronounced down here, and there was tremendous jyaki all around her. She could taste a very familiar malevolent power with every breath she drew in.  
  
Naraku was most definitely here.  
  
Another tiny gleam of white instantly caught her attention as it contrasted dramatically from the gloom of the suffocating shadows. Kagura advanced upon it warily, scowling when she heard an all-too-familiar, mocking little voice. An utterly vicious, mocking little voice --- Hakudoushi.  
  
"Ahhh, Kagura --- O-hisashiburi. It's been awhile, has it not?" he murmured sweetly, though his cruel look remained derisive as ever.  
  
_Damn_ --- though he appeared to be no more than a child, there was nothing innocent or pure about this little boy. Those calculating, pale violet eyes contained just as much warmth as one could expect to see in a viper's cold stare.  
  
"What the hell are YOU doing here?" she snapped. "Surely you haven't gotten tired of collecting heads?"  
  
Kagura glowered down upon him, squaring her shoulders in agitation. The demoness very wisely kept her eyes trained on the sharp edge of his gleaming pike; she didn't trust this little monster as far as she could kick him. She had seen him murder far too many others --- youkai and human alike, it was all the same to him. He killed them all without mercy and always while wearing the same pleasant little grin he sported now.  
  
Hakudoushi's smile broadened, as he seemed to be assessing and appraising her as well. "I'm surprised you have the courage to crawl back, Kagura --- we know you've failed us again," he sighed, his voice dripping with dismissive boredom.  
  
"Of course I had to come back, fool! YOU or NARAKU --- or --- or just _WHATEVER_ the hell you two are --- don't leave me much of a choice, do you!?" Kagura hissed, spitting at his toes. "And spare me the criticism --- you haven't scored any great victories either, as far as I can tell. Honestly, just hiding here, cringing in this dark, this chaos."  
  
Hakudoushi's eyebrows arched benignly, and he seemed content to let her have the last word --- for now. He moved to sit on a low stone bench that seemed to rise up and materialize from the very shadows of the floor of the cavern. The demon boy leaned back comfortably, seeming as bored and indolent as any aging king propped on his throne. "Yes," he intoned again. "**WE** are very disappointed with you, Kagura."  
  
The demoness felt all of the jyaki shift around her menacingly, and her fists clenched reflexively as Hakudoushi's voice suddenly blended into its deeper, richer sounding counterpart.  
  
Naraku.  
  
Kagura whirled around the instant she felt warm, sultry breath tickling against her pointy ear.  
  
She had rounded on her true master --- spinning and squinting in the pervasive darkness just in time to see him slowly pull back a wicked claw that had been far, far too close to her throat.  
  
Kagura instantly dropped to the floor, every muscle tensed and ready to spring at a moment's notice. She dragged her fan up in hasty self-defense -- -  
  
But Naraku merely laughed at her delayed reaction. "Pitiful, Kagura, absolutely pitiful," he whispered, casting her an oily smile. "You realize, of course, I could have killed you ten times over since you first slithered back into my presence."  
  
He moved to Hakudoushi and patted the child on his fair lavender hair, as if he were greeting a favorite dog.  
  
"You are becoming very sloppy, Kagura," he added casually, over his shoulder. "Now I understand how that mangy wolf managed to defeat you."  
  
"_We_ are getting impatient!" Hakudoushi interrupted with a whine, kicking irritably at the rocks. "_We_ are tired of staying down here!"  
  
"Not to worry," Naraku answered. His slippery smile most certainly did not reach his eyes. "In fact, this Naraku has an interesting task specifically prepared with you in mind. I'm sure you'll find it --- _amusing_."  
  
The evil child leaned forward eagerly, small hands flexing in their already too-tight grip on his pike. Hakudoushi was forever intrigued by the prospect of carrying out Naraku's ever violent, sadistic orders.  
  
The half-demon did not disappoint.  
  
"It's time for you to collect someone for me. He'll fight --- of that I have no doubts, but ---" Naraku eyed Hakudoushi with pride, "luckily, I have every confidence in your abilities." He paused in delivering his assignment to throw Kagura an especially scornful look.  
  
"But you, my lovely, willful little traitor. What shall we do with you?"  
  
"Kill her! **Kill her**!" snapped Hakudoushi, enthusiastically leaping from the shadows. His amethyst eyes were aglow at the very prospect of slaughter. "Here --- I'll do it for you!"  
  
"Hush now," Naraku droned. "There are plenty of other victims all waiting for you."  
  
The small demon sighed contentedly, and went back to reclining among the stones, his mind already filled with wondrous plans for destruction --- and the wide array of murder and mayhem he could unleash.  
  
Naraku turned his attention squarely on Kagura again. "But what to do with you?" he repeated, tapping his finger on his chin. She scowled at him insolently.  
  
"I suppose I should count myself fortunate that I have more obedient servants than you, ones who seldom disappoint --- or at least I thought so," the half-demon mocked sarcastically.  
  
He suddenly fixed Kanna with an equally critical, dangerous gaze. "Why did you not wait where I had instructed? You risk inviting my enemies to this place before this Naraku is fully ready to receive them."  
  
Kanna threw her master an unruffled and entirely bland look, and gestured calmly to her mirror. Naraku gazed down in interest. Despite his words to the contrary, he knew the deathly pale little creature would never disobey him without good cause.  
  
"We returned because we saw that child," Kanna stated in her dry and emotionless monotone.  
  
Naraku frowned in confusion. "What child?"  
  
The demoness stayed eerily silent, only rousing Naraku's curiosity further.  
  
"Kanna, my sweet," he murmured in fascination, as the glass of the mirror began to gleam. "What have you brought this Naraku?"  
  
Once again, Kanna did not reply, but dutifully angled the captured reflection a little higher for Naraku's inspection.  
  
Kagura's eyes narrowed in disgust. If she didn't know better, she might actually think the pasty little demoness looked proud. The wind-sorceress squinted into the glass, shielding her ruby eyes against the ghostly light that poured forth. There it was again --- that strange, uncanny vision of that stubborn little human girl, Rin, together with her taiyoukai.  
  
Naraku frowned at the puzzling image: Sesshoumaru and the wide-eyed, useless little brat that was always following in his wake? Did that interfering, overconfident bastard attack his minions yet again, and thwart another of his well-laid plans?  
  
He growled angrily. "SO --- would I be correct to assume that this haughty, self-glorifying, **arrogant** youkai has once again taken his pleasure in meddling with this Naraku's intricate strategies?"  
  
But Kanna's next words were truly thoroughly baffling. "No, Master. We only came across the girl --- the youkai lord was not there with her."  
  
She paused to draw a rattling breath. "You know my powers, Master --- after all, you are the one that graciously granted them to me. This mirror merely shows her soul. _Her human soul_. And it is clearly tied to that demon."  
  
Kagura backed up automatically as Naraku did something she never would have expected: he blinked somewhat slowly in utter mystification, his head inclining one way and the other, clearly lost in deep thought and deliberation --- as if he could not really believe his eyes.  
  
"Tell me, where is this child now?" he asked with feigned kindness, reaching out to almost lovingly drag a sharp claw across Rin's faded reflection.  
  
"She escaped us, Master."  
  
"You say the taiyoukai was** NOT** with her, and yet you were unable to subdue a mere slip of a human girl?" Naraku's sugary tone had faded to be replaced with a more violent edge.  
  
Kagura took a deep breath, and backed up a few more steps --- _this was it_.  
  
"Kagura allowed this girl to get away before I had time to fully examine the connection, my Master," Kanna rasped. Her words were delivered without feeling or emotion; she seemed thoroughly unaware and oblivious to the fact that she might have just issued her 'sister's' death sentence.  
  
At first, the full implications of Kanna's words appeared lost on the evil hanyou. "That insignificant little girl," he mused with equal parts of wonder and disbelief, completely unable to mask his interest, "is somehow tied to Sesshoumaru?!"  
  
Naraku marched away in building agitation, voicing some of his thoughts as he paced. "A connection. I don't believe it," the half-demon sighed with a smile. "For years, this Naraku has sought that arrogant dog's power, only to have every attempt repelled. And all this time, the very instrument for attaining it has been so close --- why, even right within my very own grasp so, **SO** many times."  
  
He quickly turned back to regard Kagura --- his rather wayward and errant incarnation --- coldly. "You ---" he grated, raising his claws threateningly.  
  
All along, Kagura had thought she was prepared to fight --- but the sudden speed and ferocity of Naraku's brutal attack stunned her. In an incomprehensible eruption of power, his form suddenly ripped into a thousand different directions at once.  
  
"**Fujin no Maiiiii!!**" she screamed in retaliation, sending out a shockwave of energy into his suddenly towering and twisting form.  
  
She realized too late it was the wrong thing to do. The pieces of sickly grey flesh that tore and split from that rotting, putrid mass under her sharp blades of air rained down all about her. Within seconds, she was surrounded, rendered helpless and trapped. She couldn't breathe in the sudden choking mist of rancid shouki.  
  
Her next scream was not defiant at all --- it was more of a wail of helpless terror than a battle cry. Kagura clawed desperately for her freedom and continued to try to resist bravely, but that crushing, constricting weight was all around her. She felt like a little fly trapped in a spider's web. Dimly, she remembered the markings marring her back and realized her quick analogy was probably much closer to the truth than even she cared to imagine.  
  
She knew what her fate was to be --- hell, Naraku had threatened this very end for her on occasions too numerous to count. She KNEW what happened after Naraku caught some unlucky youkai in his tangled, jumbled coils --- she had seen it too many times before.  
  
After all these years of combat and conflict, she thought she had developed a real understanding of the true meaning of pain. But nothing the wind- witch had ever experienced could have prepared her for this. She was in agony, the torture and torment intensifying to a roaring, excruciating burn the likes of which she'd never known.  
  
Kagura remembered that she had once pompously declared she wouldn't fall without a fight. She even recalled she had once sworn that she would nobly accept her own demise --- that death would be preferable to being a mere slave. All her noble vows of rebelliousness and insubordination were gone the moment she felt a second terrible blaze of Naraku's jyaki slash through her.  
  
Within seconds, she felt her mind become frozen, numb and utterly vacant. Her ideas, her knowledge and her experiences unraveled; everything seemed to be drawn into her chest, to be pulled steadily from her body. Her memories, her wants, her wishes, her dreams, her desires --- they began to vanish from her consciousness, dragged from her mind just as surely and indisputably as her youki was being drained from her body.  
  
With revulsion, she realized the longer these unbearable moments dragged on, the piercing sensations actually began to feel ---  
  
_Good --- pleasurable even.  
_  
Her heart seemed to drum in time with Naraku's in a slow rhythm that felt so soothing, so welcoming. She seemed to need to hear that dull thud just to remind herself to take in a breath of her own.  
  
_Wait a minute._ Her head jerked up and her power flared in some last-ditch instinct for survival. She screamed again as she abruptly remembered what was happening to her. She was returning to Naraku's flesh, merging with her Master.  
  
"Oh gods!! Son of a bitch!!" she wailed, all her former arrogance and pride forgotten as that pull intensified. She was right --- she **HAD** walked into hell! _No_, she moaned, focusing what was left of herself on one last futile attempt at resistance. _You have to get him out of your head. You have to fight this. Remember Kohaku --- if he can escape, maybe ---_  
  
High above her, Naraku suddenly burst out laughing --- a deep, bitter and wholly evil sound.  
  
"Oh Kagura, tell me you're not still dreaming of running away, my love? Did you honestly think Kohaku got away from me?!" the half-demon seethed in wicked delight. "Did that pitiful boy's escape inspire you? Does his freedom give you hope? Foolish woman --- you have spent too much time around Inuyasha and his pathetic companions!"  
  
Kagura groaned weakly in disgust --- Naraku was in her very mind, and clearly seemed to be able to read her every thought. With a bitter sob, she suddenly realized he probably could have read them all along.  
  
"Come now, Kagura!" Naraku continued mercilessly, and the truth of his words hurt just as horribly as the insufferable pain in her defeated body. "I let the boy go! He didn't break away from this Naraku --- he was dispatched! Even now he is my spy! And the best part is that he isn't even aware of it!"  
  
Kagura cringed as that next round of mocking laughter echoed within her skull just as it reverberated throughout the hideous darkness of this seemingly endless room. "Everyday, Kohaku gathers more and more information about the hanyou and his followers --- discovering their every weakness!"  
  
Tears built in Kagura's crimson eyes, and, at the moment, she did not have the composure or the willpower to hide them.  
  
"Simply marvelous!" Hakudoushi suddenly crowed, swaggering in for a closer look. He still maintained an air of watchfulness, minding his distance somewhat and keeping a fair space between himself and those steadily pulsing coils. "Do that again!" he cried. "Naraku, look at her tears! Look at her face --- she **DID** truly believe Kohaku got away from us!"  
  
Kagura turned away in shame and humiliation, praying it would all end soon. She tried to remember the feeling of a cool breeze against her face, but found the memory of the sensation had been drawn from her mind.  
  
"Mou owari da ---" she murmured in despair.  
  
The moment she uttered those words, completely resigning herself to the inevitability of death and defeat, the winding coils withdrew. The hideous assault was abruptly ended.  
  
Kagura collapsed to the floor and closed her eyes tightly, trying not to focus on the frightful sight and scent of her smoldering and peeling skin. Before she could gulp down a full, panting breath, Naraku knelt before her and dragged her painfully to her knees by her short, matted hair. The wind- witch whimpered and desperately tried to wrap her burned fingers around his wrist to force his grip loose.  
  
"It seems you owe that little ningen girl another debt, my dear Kagura. She has just saved your life yet AGAIN. For at the moment, I am more interested in meeting **HER** than in putting you out of your misery."  
  
Naraku leered down upon her, his breath as fast and erratic as her own as he struggled to contain his feral pleasure and excitement. The corners of his mouth twitched, pulling back over a row of gleaming teeth to form the most frightening and appalling smile she ever had the misfortune to see. Kagura turned away, completely unable to stop the deep tremors of fear that wracked her fatigued and broken body.  
  
The evil hanyou continued to smile wickedly down upon her. "Yes, I want that little girl," he stated ominously. "After all, this Naraku would benefit more from absorbing her master's power than yours, Kagura!"  
  
At a sudden flash of cold steel, Naraku glanced upwards to see his child- like bunshin gleefully prod the wind-sorceress with his pike.  
  
"Hakudoushi," he snapped, interrupting the demon-child's play. "Please extend Kohaku our warmest wishes and go welcome our wayward boy back into the fold. I have a new assignment for him as well."  
  
"And the half-breed?" Hakudoushi sneered maliciously. "When I collect Kohaku, can I collect Inuyasha's head too?"  
  
Naraku shook his head slowly, and his small incarnation looked profoundly disappointed, frowning in obvious dissatisfaction. "Not even the ears?"  
  
"No."  
  
Undeterred by the negative reply or the scowl his master now threw him, Hakudoushi brightened slightly a few seconds later. "If not Inuyasha --- his head OR his ears --- how about his bitch then? Can I kill her instead?"  
  
"Not at the present, I'm afraid," Naraku murmured icily as he unceremoniously released Kagura from his crushing grip. He watched in cruel pleasure as the she fell limply back to the cold ground. "After all, we have other plans for them."  
  
With a curt nod, he stepped over Kagura's battered form. The demoness lay shaking and beaten, thoroughly unable to control her sobs.

* * *

Rin walked cautiously from her chamber. The measured cadence of her pace had absolutely nothing to do with any lingering fear or shy reserve at confronting her master --- the simple fact was that it was just too damn difficult to move in her elaborate, heavy new kimono.  
  
Even though her mobility was somewhat hindered, there was at least one thing she could be slightly thankful for: she had discovered rather quickly that her elegant, formal outfit forced her to assume a much more regal and dignified posture. So, at least outwardly she appeared more confident than she really felt within her own heart, she reasoned optimistically.  
  
She wandered the halls aimlessly, feeling increasingly self-conscious and ill at ease with every long, lonely minute that passed. _Where did everyone disappear too? Where did Sesshoumaru-sama go?!  
_  
She turned into the familiar corridor leading to his room, only to find the shoji-screen still ajar --- just as she had left it when she had bolted from this chamber no more than an hour ago. A quick, cautious peek past the darkened doorway revealed that her master was not currently within. She stood at the threshold in momentary indecision._ Was it still acceptable for her to just enter uninvited to simply await his return?  
_  
_No_, she shook her head forlornly, it most certainly wasn't. Rin remembered all those times she had crept to this doorway when her adolescent fears became too great. Her chest tightened as she recalled the looks of stern reproach the taiyoukai would cast her when he nudged her awake in the morning. No, it simply wasn't seemly or proper for her to loiter shamelessly outside his bedchamber. She straightened her shoulders again and marched away quickly before anyone should see that she had lingered here.  
  
Rin back-tracked her steps, and returned to settle patiently in the genkan. Every hallway, whether great or narrow, intersected with this main room, and Sesshoumaru-sama would have to move past her eventually. She brushed her trailing bangs out of her face and moved to sit on one of the wide steps leading up to the spacious dais, her chin resting in her small hands.  
  
Jaken was the first to shuffle by, muttering irritably under his breath as he busied himself with some pointless task. He blinked when he spotted Rin, seeming somewhat pleased to see her out and about. The grumbling toad came to sit beside her, his chore momentarily forgotten. His blunt claws gestured inattentively over her lovely new gown and he fixed her with a look of mild apology.  
  
"This Jaken was wrong, jo-chan," he muttered sheepishly.  
  
"Hmmm?" she murmured absently in return. Her hazel eyes remained fixed on her current watch and she peered expectantly down the corridors for any sign of the taiyoukai.  
  
Jaken frowned as the girl continued to ignore him. "If you're waiting to thank Sesshoumaru-sama, you're wasting your time. The Master's gone."  
  
**There** --- that got her attention!  
  
"Gone?" Rin blinked. "Gone? But --- but --- he didn't even say goodbye."  
  
Jaken burst out in loud guffaws of laughter.  
  
"Obviously that wretched mutt, Inuyasha, must have hit you on the head one too many times! Ha --- what's the matter with you? Sesshoumaru-sama **never** says goodbye!"  
  
The cranky demon continued to chortle at her strange sense of humor, shaking his head at her amusing response. Silly ningen girl and her outlandish jokes!  
  
But from the corner of his eye, he suddenly caught a full glimpse of Rin's stricken expression and focused back on the girl in pure panic. Wait, the silly little baka wasn't laughing; this wasn't one of her inane tricks --- _she was truly stunned and disappointed! Genuinely upset!  
_  
The toad gaped in confusion, trying to piece this utterly frustrating puzzle together. Sesshoumaru-sama had thrown Rin away, only to compulsively drag her back mere months later --- scarcely a minute's worth of separation in a demon's long life. Why, it was almost as if his lord couldn't bear to be parted from the girl for even the smallest stretch of time! Why else would he go through all the trouble to collect her again?!  
  
With a tiny sigh of relief, Jaken supposed he really should not complain overmuch that Rin was back in his master's care.  
  
In truth, he was actually rather grateful. Not only had he missed the annoying, argumentative girl himself, but Sesshoumaru-sama always seemed calmer, more balanced in her presence. Jaken shuddered, remembering that the taiyoukai's bitter looks and intense mood swings had been truly terrifying to behold after he had sent the young woman away.  
  
But now that she had returned to live with them, it was **RIN'S** emotions that were clearly scattered, **HER **moods that were beyond control or prediction. Even now, her eyes were over-bright with unshed tears --- _wait a minute --- were they --- did they?_  
  
"Orokana mono! What have you done to our great master?! What is happening here? Just what the hell has been going on in my absence?" Jaken shrieked.  
  
"Nothing," Rin murmured, feeling desperately depressed and utterly betrayed. "Apparently **nothing** has been going on here."  
  
The girl rubbed at her pounding temple, more to shield her eyes from Jaken's intense scrutiny than to soothe the dull ache presently throbbing there. She withdrew into her own dark thoughts as the toad continued to rant at her side.  
  
_What was happening indeed?_ Over the past few days, her master had been acting so differently --- so tender, so caring; she had very nearly seen every girlish fantasy from her childhood come to life. AND Sesshoumaru-sama had said he was going to **kiss **her; he had held her so gently, so lovingly every night --- but now ---  
  
But now he had taking to brooding on his own again --- certainly not a good sign by any stretch of the imagination.  
  
If the taiyoukai was ashamed or could not acknowledge the subtle change in their deepening relationship in front of Jaken, then how much of a relationship could it really be anyway? If Sesshoumaru-sama would not bend his lofty, untouchable image in front of his most devoted and loyal servant, how would he act in the presence of a more imposing, more powerful demon? The handsome, endearingly haughty youkai had always claimed he did not care what others thought of him --- he had always carried himself like he was better than anyone else. _Was he still that embarrassed of her?  
_  
Why did he shut her out?  
  
_Because Totosai was right_, she realized sadly. _Because you're still only human, and in Sesshoumaru-sama's eyes, 'human' will always be synonymous with 'inferior'.  
_  
Rin felt her eyes burn. Her master may have declared she wasn't a pet, yet his recent dismissive actions were not leaving her very convinced of the sincerity behind his words.  
  
She did not mean to seem ungrateful, sitting here in his fine ancestral home, lazing about in the fine new clothes he had provided her --- but still, a simple kind word or small smile would have filled her with much greater delight than yards of sweeping fabric or ornaments for her hair.  
  
Rin looked back at Jaken, not at all surprised that he was still raving uncontrollably about her insolence and insubordination. She found herself wishing most desperately that the miko or the demon slayer were here --- gods, any woman would do at this point. She was so terribly confused and in frantic need of some practical female advice.  
  
She briefly debated seeking guidance from the little toad, but came to her senses rather quickly. Rin somehow doubted the enraged, sputtering demon would be very helpful at the moment --- and there was no way she could talk to the little creature about such embarrassing matters of the heart.  
  
Jaken was **TOO** closely involved in this whole situation anyway. As hurt as she was by Sesshoumaru-sama's insensitive detachment, the reality was she would never betray his confidence by squealing her problems into someone else's ear. Over the past few days, the great taiyoukai had actually begun to unburden his spirit and share both his past recollections and present thoughts with her and ---  
  
And she would do nothing to jeopardize or break his fragile trust.  
  
Rin cast Jaken a wry grin. Besides, she had still never quite recovered from that FIRST long ago lecture she had received from the toad on these more 'delicate' romantic matters. She still cringed in embarrassment, remembering his awful, stammering little sermon on --- on --- _s-sex_. Gods, she did not ever want to endure **THAT** experience again.  
  
With a sigh, she rose to her feet and politely excused herself, earning another rather angry, yet slightly worried look from Jaken.  
  
Rin headed slowly back to her room --- she would have preferred to stroll through the garden and enjoy the crisp autumn air and sunshine, but this damn dress would severely limit her outdoor activities. She was not usually prone to sulk, but this occasion simply demanded a good pout. And, if she was going to brood and mope around, she might as well mope and accomplish something at the same time --- she decided to organize her large assortment of amazing new presents.  
  
Her mind made up, she glided down the well-appointed hallways, pausing briefly as she passed a large gilded looking-glass hanging on the wall.  
  
She stopped and stared at the strange, stylish girl within the glass. With practiced ease, Rin gathered a large portion of her somewhat unruly bangs, and twisted them into a fashionable loop. She reached into the folds of her robe and pulled out those two dainty beaded combs, and pinned the long section into an elegant knot. With a grin, she stood back and shook her head to set the shimmering strands of pearls cascading through her dark tresses.  
  
Rin gave a small noise of delight. She had suddenly noticed that the lacquered mantle beneath the mirror held a shapely vase brimming with a few more of the azaleas she had plucked from the garden a few days ago. The young woman quickly selected a cluster with white flowers, and snapped off a few of the small branches to fix the delicate blossoms artfully around her crown. _There --- flowers._ Now she felt more like herself again.  
  
She vowed when this was all over she was going to sleep for at least ten days straight. She reminded herself once more that before Jaken's horrendous little display of bad timing, Sesshoumaru-sama HAD declared he was going to kiss her. **'_Many times_'**, in fact, he had said. She smiled to herself.  
  
_But would he still feel the same when he returned? And how should she remind him of his words?_ She just didn't understand, and cursed her inexperience. Doubtlessly, a more confident, worldly woman would know exactly how to see this through, while she didn't even know where to begin!  
  
Sesshoumaru-sama was TOO proud, but she was prepared to prove she could comport herself in the same damn dignified, and, yes, slightly pompous manner! Her grin widened mischievously at the strangely rebellious nature of her thoughts. Just as she had on that first night when she had stood shyly before his bed, she reminded herself that this was all a peculiar dance, a bizarre game.  
  
And the next move was very clearly his.

* * *

Just because Rin had come to realize that her fate was currently out of her hands, it didn't make the next few hours any easier. Valiantly, she tried to escape her pressing thoughts with boring labor. But as the hours dragged on her tension just got worse and worse ---  
  
The girl spent the better part of the afternoon arranging and rearranging her room, wishing fervently that night would never come, thus sparing her the embarrassment of realizing she'd been cast aside yet again.  
  
Idly, she ran her fingers across the gorgeous silk of her luxuriant new kimono and moved to stare out her small window once more, searching the sky for any sign of her master's return.  
  
_This would be so much easier if she didn't love him_, she reasoned. It was unbearable actually --- it hurt to care for someone so much and not be confident they shared the same feelings in return.  
  
"Doko ni iru?" she whispered to herself, gazing out at the orange sunset. All those the hours she had spent in his arms, the shy beginnings of conversation --- they could not erase his underlying coldness. Perhaps his heart was truly unreachable, protected by a wall just as imposing and real as the spiky, vicious armor he wore. The demon was scornful of tender sentiment, a complete stranger to affection --- and – and he would **never** love her.  
  
_Oh shut up! Stop whining!_ she snapped in her own mind for the hundredth time that afternoon.  
  
Rin gave an impatient huff, ceased staring at the sea and decided to inspect her beautiful new shamisen instead.  
  
The large musical instrument was rather fascinating indeed. It was crafted of the most fragrant mulberry and sandalwood, polished to a rich gleam with exotic oils. She lowered herself to the floor gracefully and strummed the ivory bachi experimentally across the three strings with great ceremony. The girl instantly dropped the bow and put her hands to her ears, cringing in horror at the simply awful, sour sound she produced. _Alright_, she mused --- it appeared she would have to practice.  
  
Never one to accept defeat easily, Rin merely moved onto the gekkin next. Surely the smaller, moon-shaped lute would prove easier to deal with --- and more natural to learn. Rin drew her small fingers against the strings and winced at the tuneless racket --- she seemed to be discovering rather quickly that her musical talents appeared restricted to singing.  
  
Gods, she had no idea how to make these silly things sound right.  
  
Rin only glowered at the last instrument --- a shakuhachi, a small bamboo flute. She didn't even want to try it, and pitched the offending thing into the far corner of the room. The flute only reminded her of that poor young hime who had once developed a fondness for Sesshoumaru-sama, to rather disastrous results.  
  
At the moment, Rin did not want to be reminded of former romantic rivals --- no matter how hopeless or doomed their affections had been. After all, the fate of her own relationship with the taiyoukai had not been decided.  
  
To distract herself from the fact that the sun had all but disappeared under the horizon and twilight was upon her, she next moved to sit on the tatami mat with her new calligraphy supplies. She scrawled out a few lines of rather badly composed poetry, soon discovering that she was too preoccupied with the prospect of dripping black ink on the fine material of her fancy robes to think clearly.  
  
_She should just take this damn kimono off!_ But then, of course, Sesshoumaru- sama would probably come home, and then how would she get the cursedly complicated thing back on again!? She pursed her lips thoughtfully --- she did not think she could convince Jaken to play lady's maid again.  
  
The moon was beginning to rise and the storm clouds were building as steadily as her growing agitation, and Rin paced the length of the small room angrily.  
  
She felt cornered and trapped. Make that cornered, trapped and --- _hungry_? With a groan, she realized her stomach was growling again. She marched angrily off to the kitchens, peering around every door in case she should unexpectedly run into Sesshoumaru-sama.  
  
But, once again, the only creature she found was Jaken. The toad threw her an annoyed look, still angry no doubt that she had chosen not to confide in him earlier this afternoon. Despite his scowl, however, he moved over at once to offer her room at the low table. With an unladylike snort, Rin noticed he had already rediscovered the sake.  
  
"What does that stuff taste like anyway?" she grated, sniffing cautiously at the bottle.  
  
The old toad smiled dreamily, "Like liquid fire! It's one of the **only** truly marvelous things your kind has ever created!"  
  
Rin eyed him dubiously, but reached out to grab a cup for herself. "Well, it smells simply terrible."  
  
"You're not supposed to care what it _smells_ like!" Jaken snarled defensively.  
  
The girl politely refilled the youkai's cup, and, before she could refuse, he had poured some of the clear, pungent liquid into her own. Rin eyed it carefully. "So --- what do I do now?" she asked nervously, reaching out to take the wide bowl up with hesitant fingers.  
  
Jaken rolled his eyes at her seemingly silly question. "Well, you drink it!" he sneered.  
  
"Jaken-sama," she murmured sweetly in reply. "Did I already tell you today how much you irritate me? I KNOW you drink it, but --- do you gulp it fast or sip it slow?"  
  
Jaken eyed her appraisingly. "Well, one such as you had better swallow it down quick before you lose your nerve!"  
  
"Are you inferring I'm a coward?" she gritted through clenched teeth, slapping her hand on the table petulantly.  
  
"Never!" Jaken sniggered. He suddenly seemed a bit too suspiciously obliging and cooperative. "Okay now, hold it like this," he instructed, demonstrating the proper way to hold the bowl. Rin watched wide-eyed, studying and imitating his motions earnestly.  
  
"Now --- one, two, three, **Kanpai**!" With his little shout of triumph, Jaken drained the contents in one gulp.  
  
Rin shrugged. "Kanpai!!" she shouted with noticeably far less enthusiasm and fervor than the little youkai. The girl sputtered and choked as the scorching, bitter liquid burned a trail down her throat. "Mazui!" she whined, wiping at her lips with her sleeve.  
  
Jaken smiled gleefully and immediately moved to pour her another glass before she could object. As proper etiquette and custom demanded, she sighed irritably, then took the tokkuri and refilled his as well.  
  
"Oh --- I forgot!" the toad added. "Here!" He clinked his earthenware cup with hers. "We should offer a toast!"  
  
"A toast?"  
  
"Yes!" he shouted, gesticulating wildly with his clawed hands. "We should drink in honor of something or someone!"  
  
"To what!? To who?" Rin questioned, catching some of his excitement, despite dreading the thought having to taste that awful liquid again. She giggled happily, setting the dripping chains of pearls from her elaborate hair ornaments twinkling noisily all around her face.  
  
"Who?! Who do you think we should drink to?!" Jaken scolded. "We should drink to Sesshoumaru-sama, of course!"  
  
Rin burst out laughing again. "Of course! Hai! I suppose I can do that!" She raised her glass merrily.  
  
"To Sesshoumaru-sama!"  
  
"To Sesshoumaru-sama!!"  
  
Jaken glanced timidly towards the rear of the kitchens, then back towards the door, as if assuring their privacy.  
  
"**And** to Sesshoumaru-sama possibly meeting his match," he said, raising his glass again and sounding a bit too pleased.  
  
Rin choked and spit out half her drink.  
  
"Do you mean _ME_?! A match for Sesshoumaru-sama? I don't know what you're talking about," she stammered, secretly feeling a bit touched by his kind, accepting words.  
  
As usual, the toad never let any affection or compliment flow between them without remembering to arouse anger and petty jealously as well.  
  
"Oh shut up, baka na ningen me!" he cried. "Do you think I am blind? I have traveled with the Master for over a century! This Jaken has stood in **HIS** mighty company long ages before your wretched ancestors were even spawned! Human, something is going on here --- and it's all your fault!"  
  
The girl remained speechless, concentrating solely on wiping up the sake she had splashed across the table.  
  
Jaken leaned forward conspiratorially, and cupped his little hand over his mouth to muffle his words --- after all, one never knew when the master might be near. "Just remember, girl, with these inu-youkai, you have to choose your battles wisely --- they've got skulls as thick as a bull's, all of them!"  
  
Rin shook her head in dumb wonder, and refused the third serving of bitter alcohol that Jaken had poured in her cup. She was already confused and slightly emotionally overwhelmed --- she had no wish to be confused, emotionally overwhelmed, **AND intoxicated** at the same time.  
  
Upon leaving Jaken to the rest of his drink, she found that night had fallen. The girl decided she would walk the length of the courtyard once before returning to her lonely chamber. She made her way outside, quietly replacing the poems hanging from the furin with the rather poor, silly rhymes she had written in the course of the afternoon. A low rumble and a massive dragging shadow startled her. "Aun?"  
  
The young woman turned in surprise. The dragon was thudding across the courtyard towards his stable, clearly exhausted and dazed --- but rather contented all the same.  
  
Rin laid her hand on his cool scaly flank as he heaved past. "What happened to you, _Aaa_, _Unn_?" she annunciated slowly. "Where have you been?"  
  
The creature merely growled again, and continued plodding towards his stall and the promise of a soft bed of straw. Rin noticed the large stone lanterns of the garden had been lit and moved to investigate. As she approached the bathhouse she was so still caught up in her roiling thoughts that she was almost upon HIM before she realized it.  
  
An exclamation of surprise passed her lips as she came to an abrupt screeching stop. Her eyes grew as wide as those damn sake bowls and she stared dumbly at the scene before her ---  
  
Sesshoumaru-sama stood on the low deck of the bathhouse. He'd shed that imposing armor and dark haori, and was currently stripped to the waist. _His entire torso was bared and exposed naked to her view!  
_  
All she could do was stand there frozen. Her eyes were unblinking, her mouth fell agape, and an unbearable heat spread up from her throat to color her face.  
  
For his part, Sesshoumaru-sama seemed unfazed by her unexpected appearance and blatant staring --- with a sigh of relief, she realized it was because he had **NOT** even noticed her at all! Instinctively, she jumped back to hide behind a glowing chochin, trying to decide how to escape without revealing her presence.  
  
But, despite her fears, she couldn't resist one small, tiny peek. _What could it hurt?  
_  
Slowly, she raised her eyes to glance back up at her master.  
  
The taiyoukai was obviously preparing to wash before heading into the ofuro for a relaxing soak. He had carried a large pottery container up from the well, and Rin watched in fascination as he slowly poured the water all over himself.  
  
Rin could only stare dumbfounded as it coursed in a slow trail over his long hair, down his shoulders, chest and back, and then along his arms. Her mouth was painfully dry and she found herself unable to even think of one intelligent thought.  
  
She had always known he was powerful --- broad shouldered, hard muscled. But she was not prepared for this sight --- for the pure, wild beauty of him. She blushed as she suddenly caught a long, teasing glimpse of the pale skin of his thigh, where his hakama slashed in a deep, revealing "v" under its broad ties.  
  
Steam surged into the chilly air and she saw him shiver slightly in the cold. He shook his head, sending a fine spray of water flying all around him. There was a sudden gust of icy wind, and Rin watched in horror as his nose suddenly twitched and he drew in a deep breath --- **damn, her scent!!** _Was she insane?! Why didn't she run when she had the chance?!  
_  
In the next instant, Sesshoumaru had whirled to face her with a rather curious look, and Rin reluctantly stood up and stepped out from behind the huge stone lantern. Surprisingly, the taiyoukai seemed to have an utter lack of embarrassment at being caught in such an intimate act. He thrust his clawed hands into his wet, silvery hair, pushing his bangs aside and out of his eyes as he gave her a more thorough, considering look.  
  
Sesshoumaru's quizzical expression softened --- and he merely stared at her with an equal look of appraisal. Rin was sure her burning cheeks were about to literally burst into flame. _Gods_, he seemed to be admiring her --- _he seemed to like what he saw!  
  
_That thought alone caused her mouth to close with a snap and her stomach to lurch. Still unwilling to run and thereby reveal just how intimidated she was, she commanded her legs to move slowly as she backed stiffly away from him. It took every ounce of her strength to maintain her dignified retreat.  
  
For his part, Sesshoumaru only remained staring at Rin's timid form in a dizzy sort of shock.  
  
_Those clothes. Her hair. Her eyes.  
  
She was --- she was truly lovely.  
_  
Standing there, shivering in this faded garden, she appeared so young and slender. And yet from those nights of holding her at his side he knew she possessed a woman's fullness. His eyes moved over her, noting the curve of her hip beneath the sturdy, crisp line of her obi and the press of her breasts under that fitted yoke of her ivory kimono.  
  
She seemed on the verge of racing off in embarrassed flight. Her whole body was tense and ready to spring away at any given second.  
  
Her complexion glowed with the soft health of youth; it was pale, but with a definite, pronounced pink blush in her cheeks. She bowed her head nervously under his inspection and the slight action faintly shook the chains of pearls that glistened against her hair and skin, reflecting tiny sparks of moonlight.  
  
Rin blinked shyly, and then unexpectedly turned her eyes up to meet his gaze once more.  
  
_Did she not realize she was only goading him to pursue her?  
_  
The brief, uncomfortable silence continued as they gazed solemnly at one another.  
  
Sesshoumaru knew the girl was trying to gauge his reaction. Rin was obviously trying to decide how just confident she should be --- or else, just how much danger she was in if it became apparent that he had reached an unfavorable decision during his afternoon travels.  
  
There was always something savage about him, something akin to that huge beast she knew he could become. His face was harshly etched in the flames from the flickering torchlight: strong jaw, high striped cheekbones, and eyes that watched her with all the unnerving perceptiveness of a predator. At the moment, only his lips revealed any hint of softness --- she suddenly realized they were curved in the barest ghost of a smile.  
  
As she stared at his lips, quick, unbidden thoughts of that kiss they were about to share pricked in her memory. Rin instantly felt that faint heat creep up into her cheeks again.  
  
Sesshoumaru opened his mouth to speak, then closed it just as quickly. His expression changed again and his eyes darkened, flooding with crimson. Rin gasped --- she had seen that look before: all those months ago when he'd held her pinned to the ground.  
  
He suddenly stalked towards her, those intense eyes never leaving her face. Rin didn't have the will to react.  
  
But rather abruptly, there was an unexpected squawk and Sesshoumaru-sama's forward progress was checked, and his arms shot out to balance himself. The taiyoukai glanced downward with narrowed eyes.  
  
Jaken had appeared from out of nowhere and clutched him about the ankles, clearly somewhat inebriated. "**SHESSHOOOUMARU-CHAMA!**" he called up admiringly with a pronounced slur.  
  
Rin didn't need a second excuse to escape from this place --- before she could rationalize her thoughts, blind instinct seized control of her mind and suddenly she ran, bolting back down the garden path and scrambling through the archway.  
  
Sesshoumaru was feeling equally stupid at the moment. Rin had just fled --- even before he could call out to stop her. He snarled and shook his leg, kicking free of Jaken's ridiculously tight grip. The thoroughly aggravated demon lord dragged the tiny toad up by the scruff of the neck, his eyes no longer gleaming with lust but with the promise of violence.  
  
Luckily, in his rather tipsy state, Jaken seemed perfectly oblivious to the danger.  
  
"Jaken," the taiyoukai drawled slowly. "To the stable with you --- **NOW**! There you will find two fat deer that need to be skinned and tended to. If you bother this Sesshoumaru again tonight, by morning **you** will be gutted and hanging up beside them!"  
  
Jaken still seemed unaware of the threat of aggression, and his enormous eyes shone with gratitude and adoration. Without another word, he stumbled off to the barn, wobbling ever so slightly. Sesshoumaru shook his head --- no doubt his servant would be snoring in a matter of moments.  
  
_Good_, he thought, eyes greedily following the path Rin had taken. Judging by her stricken expression, doubtlessly the girl was scrambling back to her OWN chamber.  
  
The time for hesitation was over --- there would be no more waiting, no more doubt, no more interruptions. Just as she was no longer the unwanted village urchin, he supposed he could no longer be just some cold, unfeeling demon lord. He had made his decision and it was time to claim what was his.  
  
He let his power build around him, fading slowly from the cold, empty garden to reappear instantly in her small room. Just as he planned, he had arrived there first and settled into the shadows to await her skulking entrance.  
  
He glanced around quickly. Her chamber was now restored to the condition it had been all those months ago --- when he had collapsed into her soft bed. _Well_, he corrected quickly, _there were decidedly less dead flowers hanging from the rafters, of course_. The darkness made the simple room seem particularly small and cozy now, especially as the weather began to rage outside and a fierce freezing rain suddenly struck the tiled roof with a furious rhythm.  
  
His inspection was abruptly ended, as the screen door was flung wide and the girl finally burst into the darkened chamber. Her breath was labored, her pace obviously slowed by the sheer weight of those layers of damp silk and satin.  
  
Rin sagged weakly against the wall, resting her forehead against the paneling. The girl brought both hands up to her temples and fought the urge to sob uncontrollably. She was exhausted, her spirit felt dark and crushed.  
  
_Gods_ --- her master was such an enigma, so kind and generous one moment, so callous and cold the next. And that darkness she had just beheld in his eyes --- she would never forget it. She was certain that was --- _that was lust_! _Why on earth did she run?_ She slapped her forehead with her open palm --- _you are the **stupidest, stupidest** girl that ever lived!_  
  
Sesshoumaru watched as Rin collected herself and then tiptoed morosely back over to the door, obviously checking to see if she was being followed. He fought the urge to smirk at her telling actions --- clearly, she had no idea he was standing only a few feet away. The taiyoukai did not wish to frighten her further, but this was an opportunity he simply could not miss. After all, no more than a few minutes ago, hadn't she attempted to observe HIM without his knowledge? This was only fair.  
  
His eyes slid over her once more from the shadows, taking in that lovely heart-shaped face, those elegant robes and that stylish mass of raven hair adorned with pearls. He felt the sudden urge to grab her, to hold her close and crush her in his embrace --- but he very much doubted she'd appreciate being seized in the dark. _Wait, why was he so concerned with startling her?_ He had --- he had every right to be in this chamber now.  
  
This house, these lands --- **this girl** --- they all belonged to him.  
  
He most certainly did **NOT** beg at doors.  
  
"Rin," he murmured, slipping out of the darkness. The girl stiffened in alarm, but did not cry out. The demon instantly felt her body temperature spike and the pace of her heart quicken dramatically, as she slowly turned to face him.  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama," Rin squeaked, pressing herself against the wall. "Ummm, you have returned --- welcome home, my lord."  
  
_What a stupid thing to say!_ she cringed inwardly. _Of course he had returned_ --- she had just been caught ogling him in the garden for several long minutes.  
  
The taiyoukai frowned at her decidedly fearful reaction and nervous words. "Why do you cower? Are you still so frightened of this Sesshoumaru?"  
  
He paced closer but she only edged steadily away. "Why do you keep your distance again?"  
  
She lifted her pointed chin, unable to answer that question herself --- after all, HE was really the one who held the answer to it.  
  
She KNEW what she wanted. She had always known what she wanted. All these years, she had placed her fate, her life --- her heart --- in his hands. She would not make a fool of herself any longer ---  
  
Rin drew herself up proudly as she thought of what she should say. She seemed completely unaware that she made quite an enticing picture to the demon, standing there in the darkness with her hand resting gracefully over her heart.  
  
"I am confused, my lord. I am not sure how to act around you any longer," the girl sighed. "You have made Rin far too happy --- but --- "  
  
She couldn't choke out the rest. Part of her --- the little-girl part --- wanted to race into his arms and cling to him, to tell him all he had come to mean to her. But the more grown-up and sensible part of her psyche told herself that such an act would be met with scorn.  
  
Sesshoumaru stopped squarely in the center of the room, standing absolutely still, as he considered her candid, unfinished reply. His chest was still bare and he seemed like some damn statue brought to life, looking absolutely ageless, flawless. Rin could not keep herself from stealing surreptitious glances at the sculpted muscles of his chest.He took another step closer. "I have reached a decision. **Regarding you**."  
  
"I know," she choked miserably, preparing for the worst.  
  
He barked out a quick laugh. "You know?" he asked somewhat incredulously. "I do not truly believe so. I am surprised at you, Rin."  
  
The demon's words were bland, and he pointed an accusing finger at her newly made bed. "You usually have a fair grasp of this Sesshoumaru's mind. Therefore, I am disappointed you would fail to understand the situation now."  
  
"Sesshoumaru, umm, I mean --- Sesshoumaru-sama?" she prodded as he stared back at her with a faraway expression on his face. "You are disappointed in me? Why? And what have you decided?"  
  
The youkai remained silent, and she began to get frantic. "Rin doesn't understand! What is it that you want, my lord?"  
  
"I want you," he answered smoothly.  
  
Rin's eyes jerked up in panic. She shook her head slightly, certain she must have misheard him. Yet his face, so watchful and waiting, told her otherwise. He wanted her? She HAD heard him correctly and yet she could not believe it.  
  
"I want you to come back to my chamber," he amended quickly.  
  
_Ohhh_ --- he was evil. So vague. She tried to remind herself that this was a perfect example of his cruelty. Especially now when he was standing there so relaxed --- looking so striking and ethereal in the gloom. This is when she must be ready for his worst.  
  
"You do not want me, my lord. It --- is --- impossible."  
  
When he advanced closer, her shock turned to panic. He looked for all the world like some fierce predator again. He was huge and commanding, and even with his power leashed it was still nonetheless indisputably there. But though his jaw was set, and his expression dark, his eyes seemed strangely warm, and just a little teasing --- **_teasing?_**  
  
"My little Rin was never this afraid before. In fact, I do not ever recall seeing her tremble so." He reached out slowly and caught her chin between his thumb and forefinger, turning her face up to meet his. Their gazes collided with breathless impact.  
  
Rin stared up at those amazing eyes. They were so beautiful, so startling. The centers were that pale, tawny amber that always seemed to catch in the light. But they were edged in that amazing darker color, a bright gold that was so --- _so mesmerizing_.  
  
"You want **me** to return to your chamber? To stay with you?" She was having difficulty swallowing. "Nothing more?"  
  
"Perhaps more," he answered mysteriously.  
  
_Perhaps more?_ Did that mean ---  
  
"Master?" she gasped. "What ---"  
  
The demon lord's face remained frustratingly impassive. "I want you to come with me. But if you choose to follow this Sesshoumaru, to share his bed tonight --- you will** not** be sleeping."  
  
Rin gasped. _What was he saying?_ He wanted to ---  
  
A wry grin parted her lips and her eyes became warm with emotion. "Then --- that's perfect, for I am not at all tired." She laughed then, the noise light and quick as the silver wind-chimes in the garden.

* * *

Glossary ---  
Okama: Crossdresser

O-hisashiburi: Long time, no see!

Shouki: Demon air; evil mist; "miasma"

Fujin no Mai: Kagura's primary attack

Mou owari da: It's finished --- It's over

jo-chan: honey, little girl

Orokana mono: Fool!

Doko ni iru?: Where are you?

Shamisen/ bachi: traditional three-stringed instrument and the pick/bow

Gekkin: traditional stringed instrument, "moon lute"

Hime: princess

Kanpai: Cheers!

Mazui: Disgusting! (in regards to the taste of something)

Tokkuri: earthenware bottle

baka na ningen me: You stupid human!

Furin: Wind chimes

Chochin: Huge outdoor stone lantern

Ofuro: bath; bathhouse

**Thank you once again to Manon and Notoes for all your time!**


	18. Chapter 17

**Long, Boring, Perfunctory Author's Note:**  
  
First of all, Sorry For The Oh-So-Long Delay.  
  
Work --- What Else Can I Say?! (Geez, I'm so tired that I'm rhyming here!)  
  
I was out on the water for a **LONG** time and this chapter was scribbled on numerous tiny scraps of greasy, wrinkled weather-proof paper then typed up in about 20 minutes --- doubtlessly, the typos will drive you all crazy! But it was either this or another two week wait! I Apologize!  
  
**ALSO:** HERE ON FANFICTION.NET This chapter will be appear fractured and short as ALL major adult content has been edited out! (The REAL, Not-for- Kiddies, Alternate Version Will Be Posted On MEDIAMINER --- 17 will appear jumpy and strange but I think I summarized the key points for those who don't like anything too graphic. Basically, there's a bit of a horribly EVIL little regression for the Lord of the Western Lands ahead. You'll see.  
  
**THANK YOU ONCE AGAIN TO NOTOES AND MANON** (Manon!!!! I got your e-mail a few two weeks ago, but I haven't been able to answer! I'll get in touch with you later today, I hope! Anyway, thanks for everything!)  
  
**GOOD NEWS!** While I was gone I discovered two incredibly kind people nominated me for a fan-fiction award! Yes --- apparently, "Eien Ni Nakunatta Shunkan" has been nominated by the membership of **Inuyasha Fan Guild for Best Romance Alternate Pairing**! Silly typos and all (I swear I'm dyslexic!)! So THANK YOU! THANK YOU! THANK YOU to NokoMarie the Snake and Resminda! I guess if anyone wants to vote you have to join the Inuyasha Fanguild at: for your time, and keep the reviews coming. They sure make me happy when I get to come home after a hard week of work!

* * *

**Chapter 17: Hajimete no Ai**

* * *

Rin reached out, and laid her hand on his arm, and together they made their way through the familiar halls leading back to his chamber. Their pace was leisurely, as they walked side-by-side, neither one saying a word to the other.  
  
As they proceeded on in awkward silence, Sesshoumaru occasionally stole quick glances down at the girl beside him. A sudden surge of protective pride raced through his frame --- Rin had never seemed more beautiful to him than she did at this very moment. He also couldn't help but notice that he had never seen her appear quite so small, fragile or scared either.  
  
In spite of her confident words and teasing laughter a few moments before, now there was an edge of alarm in her scent and her once rosy complexion was currently almost as pale as his own. He was even forced to reach out and steady the girl when her steps faltered a bit as they approached their intended destination.  
  
_And --- and she had good reason for alarm_, he mused. _Just how the hell was he going to keep from hurting her anyway?  
_  
At that very same moment, Rin was thinking along much similar lines. Regardless of her worries, however, the young woman continued to follow her master obediently across the threshold. She stood in his darkened room, waiting expectantly with her eyes averted and her hands folded demurely.  
  
Sesshoumaru's intense look softened as he watched her wage her inner war. The girl was trying her best to appear regal and poised, trying to appear confident --- all for his sake. In his mind, he resolved to make this night perfect for her --- no matter the cost to himself.  
  
Through her dark bangs and slightly lowered lashes, Rin watched her master warily. His current expression seemed so gentle and completely at odds with his usual emotionless façade. There was a warm glow in his eyes and the corners of his full lips were quirked in a peaceful --- smile?  
  
_No, it wasn't exactly a smile_, she realized. But it didn't matter --- that look still stole her breath away nonetheless. A tiny flutter stirred in her chest, and, for a moment, she let down her guard to offer a similar half- grin back.  
  
_So --- what --- what h-happens now?_ she wondered.  
  
Rin jerked in reflexive panic as her master suddenly moved towards her and she braced herself for whatever was to come. The young woman looked up in surprise as the demon merely touched her shoulder. Sesshoumaru hurriedly directed her further into the room, steering her away from where Toukijin and Tenseiga were propped innocuously against the low writing table.  
  
"Ohhh, gomen. I did not notice them," she muttered sheepishly, casting a worried look back over at the swords, and cursing herself for her carelessness. _No_, she most definitely did **NOT** need to spend this night unconscious.  
  
_But --- wait a minute --- on second thought --- passing out might actually be a bit kinder for her poor nerves!_ Rin suddenly remembered --- in lurid, vivid detail --- Jaken's stammered lecture on the act of rutting. It had come years ago, on that same awful day when she had bled for the first time ---  
  
Her master, as she recalled, had thankfully not been present, being off skirmishing with that ridiculous neko-youkai tribe again. With a knot in her stomach, she remembered her first sight of that dark blood staining her inner thighs and how she had raced tearfully to Jaken's side yelling frantically about being wounded and dying. The poor toad had merely looked at her with an expression of comical disgust, admonishing her to cease her foolish hysterics. He had then offered a long-winded, yet uncomfortably vague explanation of the changes in her young body, peppering his rather embarrassing speech with whining tangents questioning his noble lord's sanity at taking in a ningen girl. Dragging her along reluctantly by the hand, Jaken had next taken her to raid the nearest human village. Together, they had secured fresh clothing and supplies --- only after setting the human inhabitants fleeing with a few blasts from the Nintojou, of course ---  
  
_Gods --- maybe she should have begged Jaken-sama to let some of the local women stay behind! _It would have been reassuring to hear a second-opinion from a human female!  
  
Afterall, if **ALL** the toad had told her on that day was true, she could only expect more pain and more tearing and still more blood now! Rin forced herself to take in a deep breath.  
  
The taiyoukai, meanwhile, was currently wrestling with his own worries. He couldn't help but note the way the young woman had very obviously flinched under his light touch a few moments before. Maybe he shouldn't have made that damn sweeping proclamation of his intention to bed her. With some disappointment, Sesshoumaru backed away, respectfully choosing to grant Rin some distance --- for now.  
  
The demon moved to stare out the large window. _Pity. No stars._ He would have liked to have seen them tonight --- their peaceful presence always calmed him. He supposed he was drawn by their constancy, and their unchanging, dependable nature. Sesshoumaru cast a quick glance back at Rin, pleased to find she was staring at HIM with the same intensity that he had just been casting up at the thick clouds. He turned away and stared imperiously out over the sea now, utterly pleased with his decision ---  
  
_Tonight_, he would ease her fears and make this lovely creature truly his.  
  
Rin frowned at his back and his continued brooding, desperately wishing she could end the silence. She gathered a bit of her trailing robes in her hand, fervently hoping that the motion made her look sophisticated. Drawing on all her courage, she moved to stand beside Sesshoumaru again.  
  
"What are you looking at, Master?"  
  
The demon released a deep breath, delighted that she had tread so close to him without any urging. "Nothing --- there are no stars tonight," he replied sullenly. "Only rain and clouds."  
  
The young woman peered out into the overcast night sky, and then directed her gaze to the courtyard below, watching as the fierce downpour battered against the stone walkway. Rin tapped her fingers together nervously and debated whether or not she should ask Sesshoumaru-sama to clarify his full decision regarding her fate. Or maybe she should just start simple and merely inquire about what he had seen on his travels this day? Or maybe ---  
  
Rin opened her mouth to speak but quickly found her mind just wouldn't cooperate with forming words.  
  
She was suddenly, acutely aware that this new situation was far more agonizing than anything that had taken place before. Previously, she had merely worried over whether or not he would kiss her, but --- _but now a kiss was a forgone conclusion_! It was no longer a matter of '_if_' he would kiss her, but '_when_'! And --- and --- this wasn't going to stop with a mere kiss, was it?!  
  
Sesshoumaru turned and came to stand behind her, observing that Rin's shoulders automatically stiffened again when he drew within arms length. Her strained, seemingly unwelcoming reactions to his advances were so damn unnerving and the scent of her fear had now grown so palpable that it left a bitter, acrid taste in his mouth. If she were a demoness --- _any demoness_ --- he would have already dragged her into his arms and most likely have taken her down to the floor or against the wall where she stood. But --- but she wasn't a demon ---

_She was delicate, soft_ --- human.  
  
He rolled his eyes at his own dull, repetitive thoughts. That argument was over. There were no disputes that mattered anymore --- **_save one_** --- and he had already cleverly decided his course of action for when THAT particular situation arose.  
  
There was simply no way to hide the truth anymore. For good or ill, he had declared he wanted the girl and Rin had followed him to his chamber ---  
  
She was obviously willing, and --- and they both knew it.  
  
But, even though Rin was willing, she was still inexperienced and obviously afraid --- and the process of getting the girl where he wanted her to be was going to be torturously slow and painfully subtle. _Words_, he reminded himself, _she likes to hear you speak_. _So maybe_ ---  
  
"Those garments --- they suit you," he stated quietly, all the while keeping his gaze fixed firmly out the window.  
  
Rin blinked, not at all used to hearing him comment on her appearance.  
  
"Really? Thank you, my lord. Ummm, thank you for giving them to me. Thank you for all your gifts." She shivered, still a bit lost in her memories and completely intimidated by the prospect of what was to come.  
  
"You are cold?" the taiyoukai asked, using the question as the perfect opportunity to move one step closer.  
  
"No -- no," Rin declared brightly, ignoring his slight move, and motioning down to her heavy formal attire. "Even while I stayed on Totosai's mountain I can't remember **EVER** wearing this many clothes at once!"  
  
She tried to offer an innocent demonstration to lighten the mood, pushing up the many billowing sleeves and peeling back layer after layer of colorful uchikake until she finally exposed her forearm.  
  
"Look, my lord! Five of these things --- plus the kimono too!" She gave a small, shaky peal of laughter.  
  
Before she could even register his movement, Sesshoumaru had reached out to quickly capture her arm, turning it for his inspection while carefully brushing his claws against her thin skin of her wrist.  
  
"Yes, far too many," he agreed. Without warning, he grabbed hold of her embroidered collars and slowly pulled the three outermost uchikake down together, keeping his eyes trained on her startled face as the material pooled at her feet with a lush rustle.  
  
"Better?" the taiyoukai asked with feigned innocence.  
  
Rin merely wrung her fingers together and stared down at the jumbled pile of pink silk on the floor with something akin to horror.  
  
"This Sesshoumaru wishes for you to come to bed," he abruptly stated with teasing formality.  
  
"You w-want me to come to bed?" Rin rounded on him, an even deeper look of panic settling over her lovely features. Her eyes lighted quickly on his bare chest, before darting up to search his patrician face. "Right now?"  
  
Sesshoumaru held out his left hand in clear invitation, golden eyes locked with her shy brown ones. Tentatively, the young woman laid her hand in his --- he slid his other arm possessively around her waist to draw her close and ---  
  
"**WAIT**!" Rin suddenly cried out. "Can we --- can we maybe t-talk a bit more first?"  
  
"What else is there to say?" Sesshoumaru asked bluntly, feeling somewhat thwarted.  
  
"Well, Jaken-sama says that '_it_' hurts. Does '_it_'? Itau ka?"  
  
The taiyoukai only nodded. He had never had a virgin, much less a human one --- though, of course, this was not the time to divulge such personal information.  
  
"Hai, it hurts a woman the first time. Ningen or youkai alike --- they bleed. I suppose youkai women heal faster though," he finished lamely.  
  
"Oh, I see. I had hoped that Jaken-sama either didn't know the truth or that he was making up some stupid tale to frighten me," Rin whispered fiercely. "Or else that** he** was doing something awfully wrong!" She wrinkled her nose and flashed a wry grin, giggling in spite of the tension coiling in her belly.  
  
Sesshoumaru hid his smile at her teasing wit and playful banter. Truthfully though, he was feeling a little out of sorts himself --- and it had nothing to do with the fact that she was human or a virgin.  
  
What was making the moment so strange, so tense, so achingly sweet, was that beyond her humanity, beyond her lack of experience, he had also never taken someone he truly cared for ---  
  
_He had never taken someone he loved.  
  
_And --- and he **DID** love Rin, one look at her now and it was painfully obvious. But the feeling was still so foreign to him, almost like something he should continue to fight against. Damn --- he might have been fifty again, instead of nearly four hundred, for all the awkwardness he felt now with this small girl within his reach.  
  
"Do not be afraid," he stated, surprisingly mostly for his own benefit. "Have I not always taken care of you?"  
  
"Yes, always." She wet her lips with the tip of her tongue and tried to be sensible. "Well, it's just that --- I don't know what to do. And I don't know all that much about what **YOU'RE** going to do either. And --- and Jaken- sama sure didn't make the whole thing sound very appealing.""  
  
The taiyoukai sidled closer, rubbing at his temple. "What exactly did Jaken tell you?" he inquired with an exasperated huff, rather anxious to know what woeful misinformation he was going to have to combat against. He watched as Rin's face flamed as crimson as the stripes on his own cheekbones, her deep blush becoming visible even in the murky darkness and flickering lantern light.  
  
"Jaken-sama says --- he says --- that for demons rutting is an act of dominance and just like any other battle. Itau deshou! There's a lot of fighting and growling and scuffling and scratching and biting and then male will throw the female to her knees and --- and ---"  
  
She pointed a shaky finger towards his groin, intense fear lurking in her over-large eyes. "And --- then ---"  
  
Her next halting words were thankfully interrupted, as her master released a quick, unconstrained laugh. "Stop at once! This Sesshoumaru does not even wish to know the rest! I am surprised you had the courage to return here at all with all the 'horrors' that foolish toad doubtlessly described."  
  
Sesshoumaru pulled her closer and reached out to carefully draw one ornate silver comb free from her hair.  
  
"I am not going to attack you and throw you onto the ground, Rin --- though perhaps later on that is something you might come to enjoy," he breathed seductively into her soft, tumbling hair. "You have spent these past few nights here at my side --- is it really so different now?"  
  
Rin craned her head to cast him a dubious look, and worried her lower lip. She was not entirely convinced she agreed with his logic and was a bit shocked by how weak her knees had just become at his self-assured, sensuous words. _Throw her to the ground? Oh gods!  
  
_She backed up a step, politely shrugging free of his grasp. "Yes, my lord -- - this IS different. It's all so --- so strange. And --- and it's not just what Jaken-sama told me, there was that time with Inuyasha too," she admitted glumly.  
  
The demon lord backed up a step. _His bastard brother? What?_ It suddenly occurred to him that he had no clue just how long Rin had remained in the hanyou's care before coming to dwell with the old sword-smith. _What the hell had happened?! His brother had proven his obvious preference for these soft human women, but if that son-of-bitch did anything inappropriate to his little Rin --- he would --- he would claim those ridiculously undignified white ears and nail them to the wall of the shiro! He would ---_  
  
Sesshoumaru's dark eyebrows furrowed and his voice became nothing more than vicious snarl. "I**nuyasha**!?" he spat angrily. "What did he do?! What of Inuyasha? **Tell me now**!"  
  
Rin jerked away in panic. "Well, on that night --- that night you sent me away --- I SAW him and Kagome-sama --- and they were ---"  
  
Sesshoumaru relaxed visibly, shaking his head as he stared at the girl incredulously. "You endured watching my pathetic half-brother taking that woman? You saw them making love ---"  
  
This time it was Rin's turn to interrupt. Driven by pure mortification and gesturing madly with her hands, she tried to stammer out a hurried explanation.  
  
"No, **NO** --- my lord! Well, the two of them were together at a little stream --- and Rin was trying to get a bath! Actually, YOU sent me to get a bath! Rin didn't mean to --- I mean, I didn't watch! I ran off as soon as I realized what was happening, but --- but ---" Her frenzied words trailed off in an embarrassed sigh. "Anyway, it sure sounded like the miko was in an **AWFUL** lot of pain to me."  
  
The taiyoukai barked out another quick, mocking laugh. "Though Inuyasha is an awkward, clumsy, ignorant fool, that miko was most likely not in pain, Rin." He gave a small shudder of disgust, completely unable to resist casting that disparaging remark at the half-breed's expense --- all the while trying to shake another disturbing mental image from his head.  
  
"But --- do not worry any longer. You will understand soon enough," he whispered in a bewitching tone.  
  
_She would understand --- soon?_ Rin trembled. _Gods_, her master had never spoken so much as he had in these past few days --- and --- his words were all so --- so tricky. She was lost and confused, and he, for his part, seemed to delight in her being this flustered.  
  
Sesshoumaru placed a clawed finger under her chin, and raised her face so she had to look right up at him. Rin did so somewhat reluctantly, willing herself to hold her gaze steady despite her many misgivings.  
  
"But it is not the pain that really frightens you now --- is it?"  
  
"How --- how did you know?" she gasped.  
  
The demon lord shrugged casually. "Because this Sesshoumaru has spent the better part of a decade coming to understand you --- coming to know you."  
  
Feeling profoundly touched at his simple words, the young woman drew herself up to her full height proudly, noting that her master still towered over her. "Well, my lord --- if you claim to know me, then you know that there are very **few** things that frighten your Rin."  
  
The youkai snorted at her tell-tale diminutive speech and inadvertent use of her own name. "Really? Then what are you frightened of now? Tell me," he whispered, laying his hands on her slight shoulders.  
  
Rin sighed in defeat before answering. "Only one thing --- the same thing t- that's always frightened me, I guess." She hurriedly sputtered out her words, realizing that she was rapidly losing control of her very thoughts as he expertly began to knead at the tense muscles of her upper back. "More terrifying than any pain, even the m-memory of wolves, is the thought that I will l-lose you again. That this will change our lives too much --- and -- - and that one day you will come to hate me."  
  
The youkai lord was overwhelmed by that sharp, poignant sting in his chest again. He supposed, however, that after the events of the past few months, her doubts and fears were well justified. Afterall, he **HAD** tried to hate her --- only to find --- only to find that he couldn't.  
  
"This Sesshoumaru could never hate you," he replied, with all sincerity, feeling completely unashamed. Rin looked so vulnerable, so anxious, and he reached to tighten his arms around her. All he wanted was to protect her from harm, to hold her --- to love her.  
  
But the girl still remained somewhat skeptical. "But --- that's not it. Also --- on that same terrible night with Naraku --- **that monster** --- t- that thing y-you became ---"  
  
Rin's explanation died in a horrified gasp. She realized that in her nervousness these carelessly chosen words might have deeply offended him.  
  
Sesshoumaru's golden eyes narrowed and he winced as if in terrible pain. _That monster? That thing he had become?  
_  
"Rin, that '_monster_' is myself," he stated defensively. All along, he had suspected the young woman would bring this up sooner or later, and now he cursed himself for his arrogance. _Damn --- what had possessed him that night? Why did he assume his true form strictly to intimidate and terrorize her?  
_  
Rin looked up in astonishment. Though her master's answer was clipped, prideful and harsh, his eyes were clearly filled with nothing but remorse for his actions. The young woman shook her head in equal apology.  
  
"Gomen nasai, that's not what I meant, Sesshoumaru-sama. It's just that on that night, in both forms --- **YOU** --- you looked upon me as if I was the lowest creature imaginable and I-I don't want to be nothing to you!" she hissed. "I want ---"  
  
She never got to finish her sentence. His voice suddenly thundered out, deep and commanding, and hoarse with raw emotion.  
  
"Look at my eyes! Why do you think I **hid** them from you that night?" He crushed her to him forcefully. "Look at this Sesshoumaru now! Do you still think you mean nothing!?"  
  
Rin trembled, and her fingers felt like they were burning as they splayed across his bare chest. She shook her head, too confused to speak, too caught up in what she saw in his expression.  
  
"Enough!" he grated. "It has been **TOO** long since I have felt like myself!"  
  
"My lord?" she queried, her voice becoming nothing more than a squeak. Sesshoumaru tugged insistently at her small hand, leading her steadily towards the far alcove and that great bed. Rin balked as those inviting white blankets came into view. _Gods --- that mattress only seemed even more gigantic --- even more obscene --- than ever.  
_  
Not really understanding the full reasons why, she suddenly dug in stubbornly with her heels. Rin cursed inwardly as her new tabi socks offered no traction and she slid across the polished wooden floor behind him. _What the hell was the matter with her! She dreamed of this moment! She dreamed of him! But, like Totosai said, having a piece of his power didn't really mean anything! It didn't make her like him! It didn't make her a demon! What if he took her and found her to be too weak, too repulsively human, in the end?  
_  
When he met with this latest mulish resistance, the handsome youkai looked back at the girl, clearly perplexed. _Why the hell was she fighting now? Why was she trying to draw out the inevitable?  
_  
"Rin, as I know you, **YOU** know me --- in fact, you are the **ONLY **creature that knows me. Do not make this Sesshoumaru ramble out any more meaningless words when I can show you how I feel in other ways," he growled. "Come to bed --- **now**."  
  
At the taiyoukai's heated and somewhat demanding request, Rin gave up struggling and marched at his heels in a near stupor, too dazed to be anything less than compliant anymore. Her mind seemed as blank as an empty sheet of parchment as she let him guide her down onto the soft covers. She drew back the quilted kaimaki and quickly crawled underneath.  
  
The girl huddled desolately inside the blankets, resting a hand on her belly to stop the fluttering currently raging inside. _What if she wasn't any good at this? What if he wasn't pleased with her body? Afterall, just look at him --- he was gorgeous! And he'd had many lovers before --- doubtlessly all more powerful, beautiful and wise than her. Why --- he'd even had ---_  
  
_Kagura._ Her teeth ground together in agitation as the haughty face of the wind-witch and her polished, sardonic smile flashed annoyingly through her thoughts._ Kagura. That --- that condescending bitch!  
_  
Rin's head snapped up in surprise at the angry, envious nature of her feelings. She gloomily decided she'd better not concern herself with other women for the time being. She had herself to worry about right now! She must only look ahead, and take what was to come --- _moment to moment_ --- or she'd surely go mad.  
  
As the young woman remembered herself, she moved hurriedly to the side of the bed she had occupied for the past few nights. Rin curled as close to the wall as she could manage, pulling the warm blankets up to her chin tightly. She looked up a moment later, realizing that Sesshoumaru was staring down at her with a rather droll look.  
  
"What?" she shot out quickly.  
  
"You are going to bed in **ALL** of those clothes?" he inquired, his deep voice uncommonly solicitous and light.  
  
"No, not all of them," she sulked, feeling extremely embarrassed and unrefined. She reached down to her toes, and pulled off those utterly useless tabi, tossing them unceremoniously onto the floor. "Better?"  
  
The youkai did not answer, but smiled tenderly at her telling response --- _Rin's severe bashfulness was actually quite arousing_, he mused. _Let her keep her modesty --- **for now**_. Besides, he would thoroughly enjoy removing the rest of her garments himself. Sesshoumaru moved swiftly to take his own customary place beside the trembling girl.  
  
Rin swallowed noisily. The mattress had dipped noticeably, and there was a sudden rush of cold air as her master pulled back the kaimaki again. But that instant chill was immediately chased away --- replaced by the scorching heat of his body. Before she could offer another protest or ask any more questions, he drew her against his side, and held her tightly in the hard circle of his embrace.  
  
She felt his still damp hair against her temple and the firmness of his bare shoulder beneath her cheek. The length of his body seemed to shelter her, and he smelled pleasantly of the cypress trees and the sea and the fields of the whole wide Western Lands that were just as much a part of him as his pale skin and the deep timbre of his voice.  
  
"Rin," he whispered. She gulped at that one simple word --- _just her name_ -- - but now it seemed to have taken on a whole new, deeper meaning. His hands rubbed against the cool skin of her arm under her few remaining uchikake, and she was entirely aware of every inch of his powerful body pressing against her.  
  
Sesshoumaru moved to lightly stroke the side of her face and the length of her neck with his right hand. _That was fine --- she had become accustomed to that!_ Afterall, they had been exploring one another openly in the dark for the past few nights now! But while **THAT** particular hand had come to graze against those seemingly innocent, previously explored places, she couldn't help but notice that his left was resting assuredly against her hip and he was --- he was cleverly bunching her robes in his fist to slide the fabric upwards a little.  
  
"Nani shiterundesu ka? What are you doing?"  
  
"Nothing," he replied slowly.  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama, y-you are --- you are finally going to kiss me again now, aren't you?" she asked with a slight pout. "After all, you promised --- "  
  
"Despite all of your fears, at least this Sesshoumaru can be grateful that you seem most eager for this kiss," he taunted in his dry monotone, easing her away from the wall and turning her to face him.  
  
"Are you --- are you teasing me?" _Gods _--- she was afraid to even look at him right now. Rin stared over her master's shoulder; she'd do anything to avoid glancing into those piercing eyes! "Try to understand, my lord," she babbled aimlessly. "It's just that I **wasn't** ready for the first kiss, and then you made me wait forever for the second, and then Jaken-sama returned ---"  
  
"Hush --- If you keep talking right now, you will only miss another kiss."  
  
"**What?!**" Rin's lashes fluttered and her head jerked back just in time to see those familiar full lips as his mouth descended rapidly and --- and he kissed her.  
  
Despite taking her by surprise at first, the kiss itself was lingering and astounded her to the very core. It was not rough, harsh or demanding, as she half expected it to be. Instead it was very gentle --- and --- and exquisitely, achingly tender. Rin's back arched slightly of its own accord as she pressed herself closer.  
  
When Sesshoumaru drew back a humiliating whimper escaped her, and she could only stare up at him with wide eyes. She pressed her fingers to her lips, both in effort to silence herself and to still the distracting tingle caused by that unforeseen intimate contact as well. "I am so sorry. About that noise, I mean. It was loud and I know that bothers you," she offered contritely, looking up at his face with pure wonder.  
  
At that moment, however, Sesshoumaru was equally stunned as well. "Noise? Oh --- no, that was a good sound, little one. A **very** good sound." His utterly vibrant eyes were deep and glistening, and filled with a longing hunger that stirred an unfamiliar reaction in the pit of her belly. _Wait --- was it her belly? Or was it somewhere else?  
_  
Before she could contemplate her body's reaction any further, Sesshoumaru moved to taste her mouth again, completely at his leisure, and Rin was forced to concentrate only on **THIS** most distracting, amazing sensation. His lips were so breathtakingly gentle as they moved over hers, yet despite their softness, she could not mistake the possessiveness behind their claim. She remained completely still as if paralyzed, and the taiyoukai suddenly broke away from her, offering a nearly inaudible rumbling chuckle.  
  
"Nani?" she asked unsteadily. "Did I do something wrong wrong?"  
  
"Nothing. You did nothing wrong," he whispered, cupping her pointed chin with his hands and tilting her head back to kiss the smooth skin of her throat.  
  
But --- but he was still chuckling and Rin frowned in mild annoyance and embarrassment. "**Naaani?**" she repeated a little more fiercely. "Why are you laughing at me, Sesshoumaru-sama?"  
  
"I am **not** laughing at you," he sighed. "But, you have to let out your breath, little one --- you have to breathe."  
  
"I'm trying! This is not easy." She struggled to comply with his request --- **TRULY** --- but she met with small success. How the hell could he expect her to relax?!  
  
"This Sesshoumaru has been a bad influence --- you are thinking too much right now." His words came low and husky and far too close to her lips, and Rin instinctively knew that he was about to kiss her yet again. Logic deserted her as his handsome face seemed to descend in slow motion this time, his mouth lowering to hers with torturous delay ---  
  
But --- but when their lips finally did meet again, everything else sped up to a dizzying pace. Her heart hammered even more feverishly, and her blood seemed to be racing uncontrolled through her veins. In desperation, she clung to his shoulders as if he were the only sturdy thing in a far too shaky world.  
  
Rather surprisingly, with this kiss, his tongue slid along the seam of her lips, and she gasped at the strange, unexpected sensation. At her quick indrawn breath, he drove fully into her mouth and, all at once, every confusing emotion she'd been trying to keep at bay for so many years came back in a blistering rush. He stroked deep within her mouth, using both lips and tongue in the most erotic manner imaginable, and she was very nearly overwhelmed at the unfamiliar feelings coursing through her. She felt an urgency the likes of which she'd never known, yet she squeezed her fingers fitfully at his shoulders and pushed him steadily back.  
  
Rin was panting when he finally conceded and released her mouth. He gave her no real respite, however, only leaving her lips to nibble at her tiny earlobe and then down the column of her throat. "You did not like that?" he asked quietly. "That deeper kiss?"  
  
"Yes, I mean --- **no** --- I mean, I just wasn't expecting it, that's all," she answered hurriedly, trying to focus on the sound of the driving rain outside.  
  
Sesshoumaru's lips were currently traveling downward with a sureness that stole her breath away, and she suddenly realized that he was following along the awful trail of her old scars. Rin hunched her shoulders self- consciously, recognizing that she might have been too quick to drive his distracting kisses to these **MORE** uncomfortable places.  
  
With a small noise of frustration --- **or triumph** --- at her insecure actions, the youkai abruptly abandoned her throat. "If you do not like what this Sesshoumaru is doing now, perhaps we can try that kiss again --- if you'd prefer." Without waiting for an answer, he returned his mouth to hers, using his tongue to trace another possessive path along her lower lip. Rin's mouth opened in another gasp, allowing him entrance once more.  
  
_Somehow_, she mused, _his actions seemed both demanding and rewarding all at once_.  
  
His large hand suddenly moved up from her waist and across her rib cage to her breast. The girl was utterly surprised at the rapid wave of pleasure that followed, and she moaned into his mouth.  
  
Sesshoumaru ended the kiss, gauging her reactions carefully. Yet he waited patiently for her to relax, resting his forehead against hers and staring into her eyes as she shook with fear and expectation.  
  
"Why this sudden hesitation yet again?" he goaded easily, his face inches above her own and his hair forming a silver curtain all around her. "Kiss me back. Would you find this less difficult if this Sesshoumaru told you he is feeling nervous as well?"  
  
"**You** --- you are?" Rin threw him a sharp, disbelieving look. "You are making fun of me again," she chided, unconsciously leaning closer to him all the same.  
  
"Well, you are being unreasonable." He said it if she were still a wayward child and he the tolerant, forbearing ward. "Kokyuu shiro --- relax." Still holding her tightly, the demon casually brushed his mouth across her temple. "Maybe you need a little more help."  
  
Sesshoumaru's smile and words were so vague and guarded; Rin marveled that a man so powerful, so decisive, could be so incomprehensibly introverted and withdrawn when it came to simple conversation. Her musings were suddenly interrupted as the taiyoukai made another, even more devastatingly nerve-wracking declaration. "Do not worry. This Sesshoumaru will make this perfect for you," he stated far too offhandedly. "And I will not take you until you beg me to."  
  
Rin's swore her heart stopped beating in her chest. If her master thought talk like that was going to relax her, he was sorely mistaken! Her body went rigid again and her eyelids flickered in shock at those smug, promising words.  
  
Sesshoumaru's arms and that warm white fur tightened around her and, once again, he moved to kiss her. This time he barely touched her lips with his, reveling in her instant quivering response. With the same feather-light touch, he began to kiss her flushed cheeks, tilting her jaw back to caress the warm skin of throat. His claws traced the curve of her shoulder, angling downward along the length of her slender arm to clasp her tiny hand and lace his fingers with her own.  
  
"Gomen ne --- I've never felt anything like this," she muttered between the next little kisses. "It's --- it's like my skin is on fire but I can't stop shaking like I'm cold. Is that --- right?"  
  
"Hai --- it's supposed to feel like that. **Shhhh.** You are fine," he replied. Sesshoumaru threw her a wry grin, eyes focused on her heaving chest. "And I suppose you do not like any of this either?"  
  
Although her jaw was clenched in clear nervousness, the girl managed a little laugh and a gentle nod. "No --- I like it." He rewarded her with a small brush of his knuckles against her stubborn chin.  
  
"Rin --- always remember that I take care of what is mine." Sesshoumaru sat up suddenly, the hand on her chin sliding around to circle her neck and fist through the sable hair at her nape. He reached up to pull that second silver comb free and her heart raced furiously, every nerve on alert.  
  
"And --- and **you** are mine," he concluded boldly.  
  
Rin was so undone by those startling words and the compelling force of his actions that any of her own hesitant arguments were left unsaid. Her eyes drifted closed, and she felt his lips rush to meet hers once more. There was nothing left to think about any longer and she surrendered her body to him fully.

* * *

When it was over, he held her tightly in his strong arms, and Rin replayed all that had transpired between them --- every tender action, every panting breath, and every smoldering look burned forever in her dazed mind.  
  
Sesshoumaru kissed her gently, and all of her pent-up emotions threatened to overwhelm her once more. When he finally pulled his mouth away from hers, she released a helpless moan, and let her head fall weakly against his chest. "Sesshoumaru --- will I --- I'll **always** be yours, right?"  
  
"Always --- **Aijin**," he murmured as his lips teased hers apart with gentle nips from those strong fangs and heated strokes of his tongue.  
  
Rin's eyes flew open at that tender word. An old, formal endearment --- so sweet and simple with its meaning. **_His lover_**.  
  
Sesshoumaru's jaw clenched, currently remembering the girl's own fierce words when he had taken her. "**Anata wo aishiteru!** Zutto aishiteite ima mo eien made!" she had sobbed breathlessly into his pointed ear.  
  
That loving declaration, in fact, had been his undoing. He had lost himself for a moment, biting down hard on the delicate skin of her neck, to taste her coppery blood and feel her body wrench aggressively against him. But at least he had remembered himself at the last minute --- at the most important part. He had not finished inside her welcoming body --- he had **not** reached completion within the girl.

But still, in all his long life, the demon had never known anything so sweet. _Gods_ --- he should have known it would be like that --- Rin was always so giving, she never held anything back from him.

He felt like he couldn't get enough of her. _So that is what Chichiue and that whelp were so helplessly addicted to _--- somehow she seemed to respond instinctively to his need for dominance. She had been there for him, clinging to him, trusting him. For her part in their loving act, there was no selfishness, no egotism --- **no** taking. And somehow --- her devoted acceptance and surrender made him feel even more powerful than any battle he had ever fought, or any victory he had ever claimed.

They continued to relax for a moment, laying close together now, just staring at one another in bewildered marvel. Sesshoumaru's hands remained at the girl's little waist, while her arms looped tighter around his neck. After a few more quiet moments, he shifted and reached out, brushing his claws against her parted lips gently. Rin let out a slow, shaky moan and absently kissed at his fingers.  
  
She focused her gaze on her master, finding him to be regarding her with an utterly engaging expression that somehow seemed both fierce and tender all at once. She cast him a rather dazed and lop-sided grin in return.  
  
Sesshoumaru felt his heart twist again. _She was faultless, flawless_ --- her porcelain skin was still flushed, and those huge, dark-lashed eyes were shining with happiness.  
  
"Save such smiles only for this Sesshoumaru," he groaned, pressing his body closer to place a swift, sweet kiss on her lips. He did not fill it with any of the passion they had just shared but only with that other less clear emotion instead. **_Love_** --- he had already admitted to himself. But his savage pride would still not allow him to utter such a simpering declaration aloud, so he merely repeated, "Save such smiles only for this Sesshoumaru."  
  
It was a beautiful sentiment, and the young woman smiled warmly and reached up to stroke her finger against his forehead, tracing the emblem of the crescent moon. He may have had other lovers, but, for the moment, she was no longer jealous. Something in his eyes now made Rin certain he had given the best of himself to **HER** alone.  
  
"Yes. Only for you," she agreed.  
  
At her words and emphatic nod, Sesshoumaru released a weary breath, and let his head fall to nuzzle into the curve of her neck, licking apologetically at the deep wound he had made.  
  
The girl winced. "T-that's right --- you bit me!"  
  
"Un," he answered absently.  
  
Though Rin did not admit it now, Jaken **HAD** indeed mentioned something like this often happened between youkai. She laughed inwardly --- it seemed to be the **only** fact he had gotten right!  
  
"You have marked me as yours?" she questioned breathlessly.  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled to his side, bringing the small girl with him so she rested half on top of him. The fluff of his tail wound possessively around her back again, tickling across to her ribs, skirting teasingly shy of a full breast. Everything felt so tender, so right --- it all seemed just as warm and intimate as the moment before. "Yes," he finally answered.  
  
Rin smiled dizzily at his words and collapsed weakly against his shoulder. _She was his --- she was his ---  
_  
But --- but now that the intense crashing pleasure was fading, other feelings were beginning to creep into her mind and body. First and foremost, the young woman noted, was that she was most definitely feeling **quite** sore and stretched. Even more disconcerting, however, was the odd sensation of that rapidly cooling wetness trailing across her belly and hips. _Sesshoumaru-sama was --- he was supposed to do that inside her, wasn't he? Wasn't that the point? Why did he pull away and out of her body when he did?  
_  
She raised her hands to brush that thick, viscous substance off of her skin. The taiyoukai propped himself up on his elbows and watched her actions with obvious concern. His demeanor seemed awfully tense and Rin sought to innocently inquire about his puzzling actions. "My lord, why did you not finish inside ---"  
  
"This Sesshoumaru is **not** ready for heirs," he bit out before she had time to complete the question. "The time is not right."  
  
_Liar_, his mind screamed,_ you care for this girl, love her even --- yes --- but --- the time will never be right for that. She will never bear your children. There will **never** be another hanyou in your line.  
_  
But some selfish, covetous aspect of his demon nature prevented him from discussing this now. The girl was his, and when the time was right he would **make** her understand the way things naturally had to be.  
  
_It would be alright_, he reasoned. Rin had declared her love --- her desire to remain with him always. She was endlessly patient, and so very thoughtful and forbearing. She would simply accept his decision on this issue as she had with all other things.  
  
**_Then why don't you tell her NOW?_** that same inner voice reprimanded scornfully.  
  
Sesshoumaru looked into Rin's widely-set hazel eyes. They were so hopeful, buoyant and adoring. Looking at her now, why did he suddenly feel like he had been stabbed in the gut?  
  
"Hai, not at this time. I understand, my lord," she replied cheerfully. "You are right, of course. Too many enemies. Too many questions." She nuzzled into his chest feeling so very contented.  
  
Sesshoumaru's stomach turned in revulsion at her naïve show of blind trust, faith and love.  
  
_Fuck_ --- deceit was just not his way. To this day, no matter how bitter his feelings towards his half-brother, he still felt nauseous whenever he remembered how he had permitted Jaken to use the Mu Onna against Inuyasha, tricking him into believing she was his own mother returned from the underworld.  
  
But until this very moment, however, **HE** had never actually truly lied. And it sickened him that this loyal girl who had followed him unfailingly for the past decade, this sweet creature who had just surrendered her innocence to him, should be the first.  
  
_**Wait**_, he reminded himself as his cool logic prevailed, _technically this wasn't exactly a lie_. Rin WOULD learn his will eventually, of course --- but just not here in his bed; and certainly not now, mere moments after he had taken her virginity.  
  
Having no reason to doubt his brief explanation in the slightest, Rin's current thoughts were not nearly as deep or tortured as her master's. She only felt an intense swell of gratitude at his altruistic concern for her safety, and his apparent desire to take the time to savor and build this new dimension of their relationship. The young woman sighed in comfortable exhaustion.  
  
_There was nothing to worry about_ --- she had a long life ahead. _His life_, her mind clamored excitedly. Once again, her days would be filled with joyful, endless hours spent devotedly at his side and she was simply too happy to think beyond this amazingly precious moment in time. Here she was, lying in Sesshoumaru-sama's strong arms --- in the aftermath of his loving --- **everything** was perfect. Everything was going to be alright.  
  
She wriggled up alongside him. "Sesshoumaru-sama? What we just did --- can we do it again?"  
  
He cracked a heavy, scarlet-marked eyelid. "Yes."  
  
"Right now?" She placed a string of bold kisses along his jaw.  
  
Sesshoumaru smiled at her enthusiasm, her current amorous actions driving all doubt and guilt to the furthest recesses of his mind.  
  
"Hush, Aijin. No --- not now," he answered her while regarding her with mock-disapproval. "Are you not sore?"  
  
Rin blushed at hearing that endearment again --- **_his lover_** --- she could get used to being called that.  
  
"Well, yes," she admitted candidly. "But --- but --- that probably wasn't very good for you, ne? Now that I know what its like --- now that I know what you're like --- I can do better, I think."  
  
"Not very good? Little one, if you only knew --- it was you who was cheated, not this Sesshoumaru."  
  
"Cheated? But I felt that same '_thing_' you just did --- before!"  
  
Sesshoumaru frowned, remembering her pain and instinctive nervousness when they made love. She had been too damn tense to really let go. He would have preferred it if she had reached her climax with him, but it would take awhile to teach her to not be so embarrassed about her body's natural reactions. The taiyoukai was struck by sudden idea.  
  
"Just lay still, my Rin, there are still over things this Sesshoumaru can show you."

* * *

Several intense hours later, Rin lifted her head to looks up at him in foggy contentment. "Ohhh, you did t-that --- that _thing_ to me again," she mumbled. "I love you --- so much. So, so much."  
  
The demon stirred at her simple words.  
  
Rin had trusted him with her body --- _she loved him_ --- but how? Why?  
  
Rin offered another shy smile. Sesshoumaru-sama's beautiful face was obscured in the shadows and the thin light of the approaching dawn. His magnificent silvery hair fell in thick waves plastered haphazardly around his sweaty shoulders and his eyes were dark and solemn. Though the young woman knew somehow that he was well pleased with her, at the moment he seemed to be examining her rather critically. Like there was something important on his mind.  
  
"What is it, my lord?" she whispered, dragging in an erratic breath.  
  
"How --- how is it that you were always so confident that you love this Sesshoumaru?" he asked hurriedly, listening intently to her still racing heart. _Perhaps_ --- perhaps the girl's answer would shed some more light on his own unfamiliar feelings.  
  
Rin shook her head, staring into his amber eyes as she pondered his strange question.  
  
"Because – I just know," she answered. She nuzzled into his chest, inhaling deeply to take in all of his masculine scent. "**I love you**," she repeated with absolute firmness.  
  
"But why? **Nande?**" he pressed on, and his expression was so earnest and genuinely honest that she only wanted to pull him tighter in her arms.  
  
A small frown creased her brow ---  
  
_Why?_  
  
Sesshoumaru was so ancient, so old, and yet that devastatingly blunt and brutal question was asked with a child's curiosity. _Did he doubt the true depth of her feelings simply because he could not feel such an emotion in return?  
_  
She was completely aware that he hadn't returned her words when she'd declared that she loved him tonight. _Maybe he was simply wracked with guilt already. At this very moment was he suddenly seeing the helpless little girl she had been and feeling **sickened** about what they had just done?  
_  
Rin reached down to clutch the wrist of his still healing left arm. _Why did she love him? Gods - she could think of a million reasons. He was beautiful, proud, powerful, loyal, brave, intelligent --- but it went deeper than that.  
_  
"I must breath to live, ne?" she asked plainly.  
  
"Of course." Sesshoumaru quirked an elegant eyebrow at her strange, somewhat pointless retort.  
  
"And I must eat and drink as well?" she continued patiently, ignoring his adorably pompous, questioning look.  
  
"Hai," he snorted, tossing his silken hair over his shoulder, clearly confused at where she was going with this.  
  
"Well, I love you because I **MUST**. I need you --- you --- you don't have to say the same. You don't even have to feel the same. But just --- just try to understand, Sesshoumaru-sama."  
  
She curled further into his chest, afraid to look in his face. Dimly, beneath her stroking fingers, she felt the faint relaxation of his jaw and realized the usually stone-faced demon was actually smiling again.  
  
A slow, sleepy grin spread over her face in return, and she yawned contently.  
  
"Arigatou, Sesshoumaru --- for tonight. Thank you for everything," she sighed. With that, she drifted to sleep, too exhausted to even dream, her fingers still twined in his long hair.  
  
Sesshoumaru waited for the slow even breathing that indicated she was deeply asleep. "Omae no you na joshi ga ima made zenzen inakattanda," he whispered.  
  
The taiyoukai pulled her closer against his frame in dumb wonder. He cradled the girl's head in the crook of his arm, and pondered what he had ever done to deserve a sweet, caring creature such as this in his life.

* * *

**Yes --- this chapter sucks! But like I said this is the tame, rated R version! I'll fix it later when I have more time.  
  
**PS: Started to work on the drawings, coming along better than the story at least. Should have some up soon, when I find a place to put them!  
  
**VOCAB:  
**  
Aijin - My love, lover (I love this word!)  
  
Anata wo aishiteru. Zutto aishiteite ima mo eien made! - I love you. I have always and will always love you!  
  
Hajimete no Ai - First Love  
  
Ima – Now  
  
Itau ka? - Will it hurt?  
  
Kaimaki – quilted winter blanket  
  
Kokyuu shiro – Breathe  
  
Kowaku na. Do not be afraid  
  
Sess: Nande? / Rin: Doushite? - Why?  
  
Rin: Nani ga okotteiru na no? / Sess: Nani ga okotteirundai - What's happening?  
  
Nani shiterundesu ka? - What are you doing?  
  
Ochitsuke - Relax/Just relax/Calm down  
  
Omae no you na joshi ga ima made zenzen inakattanda. - There has never been another like you. (evil, bad, naughty Sesshoumaru --- NO "I love you's!"  
  
Ugoku na - Be still  
.


	19. Chapter 18

**Aunthor's Whacky Ramblings:**

_Yes --- I know recent manga events have utterly destroyed what was left of the plotline of this story! Well, it was far-fetched to begin with anyway! As I said before, I don't think Inuyasha would take eight years to mull over the Kikyou/Kagome triangle! (I don't think Kagome would let him!) And the Inu-tachi would have had to break the Jewel at least 5 more times to account for a decade passing without putting the final smack-down on Naraku! What can I say? I'm selfish --- I just wanted to play with canon characters (it's so fun to make Hakudoushi 'talk!')!  
  
Sorry, for the delay. As you know, I disappear to go out on the water every other week, and this week our boat's engine BLEW-UP. Yes, it died horribly with a snap of pistons and valves and lots of black smoke. As it is rather hideously expensive thing to fix, all my time has been spent 'angst-ing' over it! Which is why, you'll soon discover, that this chapter is more violent than romantic as I am not in the zone for 'happy thoughts'.  
_  
_Oh! Some thoughts on Rin. Yes, I am trying to make her overly naïve. Afterall, she has spent her life in relative isolation, and Sesshoumaru- SAMA!!! is her hero! Why wouldn't she believe him unflinchingly, even despite the fact that he pushed her away at the beginning of the story? Rin WANTS to believe him. She wants nothing more than his love and acceptance. But as we all know, she DOES have a backbone (even when it comes to her haughty little taiyoukai!) --- so sit back and grab some popcorn and watch her find it (er, slowly! Maybe not in this chapter!)  
  
Sorry for any typos --- **AGAIN**. We re-read these chapters forty million times, giggling and relaxing with glasses of wine, laughing as we tend to even jokingly imitate the voices! Wait --- maybe that's my problem right there!  
_  
**Warning: "Morning-After" sappiness and fluff abounds. Nothing too daring for most eyes (except poor Jaken's maybe!). However, like I said, there IS some violence at the beginning ---**

* * *

**Chapter 18: Yakusoku**

* * *

The sun shone brightly, filtering down through the lush canopy of leaves to dapple the forest floor with vibrant patches of light. He crouched on a high branch of a weather-beaten pine and inhaled deeply to take in and sort through the many scents carried along on the afternoon breeze.  
  
His wide, inquisitive eyes narrowed in thoughtful concentration.  
  
On this day, the wind carried the distinctive, pungent odors of thick smoke and --- and some manner of creature he had never smelled before. His nose twitched again as he tried in vain to recognize this new scent. Whatever animal it belonged to, the unusual smell was most definitely becoming stronger, indicating that the bizarre creature was steadily moving closer. The unmistakable sounds of snapping twigs and the tramping of undergrowth soon filled his sensitive ears, and, within moments, the clearing below him was filled with a small group of rather peculiar beings. They were bearing large torches, scuffling and carrying on noisily as they traveled along. Each and every one of them seemed perfectly oblivious to the fact that they were being so keenly and intently studied ---  
  
Intently studied by not one but **TWO** sets of golden eyes.  
  
He absently brushed his silvery shoulder-length hair away from his face and called up softly to the beautiful pale woman resting beside him.  
  
"Hahaue? What are those?" he asked, pointing with his small clawed hand. "What are those funny creatures down there? They don't feel like us." He stood up on the tips of his toes for a better look.  
  
His mother smiled gently, her golden eyes shining with obvious, unrestrained pride. She nodded her fair head, sunlight reflecting from both the ornate jeweled diadem circling her high forehead and the delicate silver earrings dangling from her pointed ears. She shifted her long white braid back over her heavily armored shoulder, and glanced back down at the flurry of activity in the glade beneath them. "Very good, my son," she replied. "How exceptionally quick and bright you are --- as usual!"  
  
He smiled triumphantly, beaming under the warm glow of her praise. He would never tire of hearing her small compliments, no matter how frequently she lavished them upon him. Afterall, Hahaue was the most brilliant, powerful, and, not to mention, the most beautiful woman in the whole wide world --- and --- and if she said he was clever than it **TRULY** must be so!  
  
"You are right, of course --- they aren't like us --- those are ningen. Humans," she explained patiently. Hahaue bit her lip with a sharp fang, as he looked down his nose at the creatures, trying his best to imitate Father's most intimidating and regal posture.  
  
"Humans?" he repeated, watching in fascination as a tall male prepared to chop at a nearby tree with some manner of iron weapon. _Strange_, he thought. _Why didn't it just use its claws?_ He gasped in surprise and leaned further over the edge of the slender tree limb. _Why, it didn't have claws at all!  
_  
He heard his mother laugh at his reaction, as she reached out to gently draw him back. "Careful, love. Yes, Sesshou-chan. Those are humans and they are working. They are gathering wood for their fires." She smoothed down the fluff of his tail and laid her soft, alabaster hand on his shoulder. He turned from her to stare back down at those enthralling, unfamiliar beasts again. Crooking his head to one side, he regarded them critically. "Their ears sure are funny," he stated flatly, wrinkling his small nose.  
  
Hahaue released another quick, quiet laugh, the sound causing an answering smile to light on his own face. He was always so happy to please her --- afterall, she had seemed so sad and somber of late, what with Father always being busy and away from the shiro.  
  
"Yes, my prince, their ears are funny because they are very different from us!" She leapt agilely down to a lower tree limb, her long lavender robes flowing behind her, and beckoned for him to follow.  
  
He grinned, feeling so very proud and pleased that she trusted enough in his abilities and was inviting him in for a closer look. "Different?" he echoed, when he settled next to her again a moment later.  
  
"Yes --- quite different," she answered. "They are not anywhere near as strong as demons like us. They have relatively little power --- no youki --- like you or I or your great Father. And their lives are fleeting --- they grow old and frail in the blink of an eye!" Hahaue snapped her fingers for dramatic emphasis, her long claws clicking together loudly. He blinked and looked down reflexively, fully expecting the humans to have heard that unmistakable threatening sound ---  
  
Yet despite that obvious crack, the boisterous creatures carried on as if they heard nothing at all. His mother crouched on the wide branch as if ready to spring again, yet she remained where she was --- seemingly content to just sit with him in silence.  
  
He shook his head at the ningen in wonder. _They didn't hear that noise?_ When his mother clicked her claws together, he thought for sure that would be a dead giveaway of their current position. He couldn't decide if he liked these humans or not. Though intriguing, they seemed to be rather thoughtless --- afterall, it WAS kind of stupid to be drawing such obvious attention to themselves when they couldn't even properly sense all that was happening around them. He sneezed. _And, besides, they sure smelled funny too_.  
  
"They seem pretty foolish to **THIS** Sesshoumaru," he stated with spoiled authority, though he was anxious to hear his mother's opinions on them as well.  
  
Hahaue scanned the tree-line and grinned into the murky shadows. This time, however, her wide smile most certainly did not reach her eyes. "Ahhhh, but just remember, my son.....humans **DO** have their uses though." Her fingers pressed against her wine-colored colored lips, as she motioned for him to remain silent.  
  
He looked at her questioningly, as her eyes narrowed into predatory slits. Her voice trailed into a dangerous whisper. "For instance, unfortunately for them --- humans --- they make fabulous bait ---"  
  
At that very moment, the earth began to rumble and shake, and he was forced to cling tightly to the overhead branches to keep from falling to the ground. The humans below began to whimper and look wildly around in terror.  
  
"There THEY are," his mother whispered quietly to him, cracking her knuckles and allowing her poison to build on her wickedly curved claws. She gestured to the center of the clearing.  
  
He squinted down to the very spot she indicated. There was some power pulsing beneath the surface, and the distinctive sound of scraping and digging. Before he could identify the source, and LONG before the poor ningen could even register what was really happening at all or mount an adequate defense, the ground split open and a foul looking centipede demon burst through the rift in a shower of dry dust and dead leaves.  
  
Mother had been right, he mused as the humans tried to flee. They WERE truly helpless, and, in a matter of seconds, the demon had popped one into its dripping maw, snapping it in half even before the terrified creature knew what was really happening.  
  
With a cry of feral excitement and outrage, Hahaue stormed down from the trees --- fangs bared and her right hand extended. A fine mist coalesced at her fingertips, growing to form a shifting circle of pure power. The energy continued to gather until it appeared to be nothing more than a harmless dark green ball.  
  
As the ball rapidly increased in size, she released it into the air, hurling it directly at the giant centipede demon just as it cornered a second human. The beast turned in shock, trying to shield its many eyes from the circle of bright light rapidly streaking towards it.  
  
Just before the glowing ball made contact with the hissing, bewildered creature, it exploded into a hail of darts and thousands of needles of pure poison rained mercilessly into its thick skin.  
  
No matter how many times he saw it, his eyes still widened in awe at Hahaue's deadly signature attack. The creature writhed in pain, its armored hide melting away wherever it had been pierced. His mother spun agilely, slashing at the dying beast with her sword, cleaving it down the middle and putting it out of its misery.  
  
She stood triumphantly over her prey, poking at it with her iron-clad toe. She caught his curious, adoring eyes and beckoned for him to approach.  
  
He leapt nimbly to his mother's side, just as the remaining humans raced back to offer her their gratitude, each one throwing itself onto its knees at her feet.  
  
_"My lady!"  
  
"Oh, my Lady! Sesseika-sama!"  
  
"You've saved us! Again!"  
_  
The whining chorus continued as they each clamored unsuccessfully to gain her full attention.  
  
"Be silent." She ordered the humans back with a sneer, raising her hand in warning.  
  
"Sesshou-chan!" she suddenly shouted, her expression softening as she shifted her words and attention from the simpering humans to focus strictly on him again. "Get back into the trees, my sweet --- right now!"  
  
He obeyed instantly, turning back just in time to see her raise her sword again as she fell into classic defensive stance.  
  
Hahaue smiled proudly up at him, then rolled her eyes and turned back to the humans once more. "Get back --- all of you!" she cried. "There is ANOTHER one coming!"  
  
There was collective wail of terror and the feeble, frightened creatures tried to flee again. Just as before, the ground began to rumble and, within seconds, a second centipede demon slithered up from the deep hole in the earth. This one was larger, more heavily armored, and, judging by the shrill tone of its raspy voice, most definitely female ---  
  
The centipede demoness' gaze instantly fell upon the smoking carcass of her mate and she shrieked in pure, unadulterated hatred and fury. The nightmarish beast reared up into the air, hundreds of legs and sharp pincers waving madly, her many dull black eyes fixing exclusively on the one creature that remained exposed in the open --- his mother.  
  
"**Onore!** You bitch! You killed him?! You killed my mate!" She glowered down spitefully at the dog-demoness then shifted her heated gaze to the many cowering humans, presently covering their faces and trembling in the undergrowth. "And for what!? You killed him for attacking those whining, mindless animals?!"  
  
Hahaue laughed cruelly, staring up at the other youkai without the slightest trace of fear. "You repulsive thing --- you think I was ONLY defending these humans? I AM defending MY lands, komusume," she mocked sardonically, casting a rude jab at the demon's clumsy bulk. "The Western Lands and everything dwelling upon them are **MINE**. Your 'mate', that bloated dead fool over there, was trespassing! Trespassing just as YOU are right now!"  
  
The centipede demoness blinked in surprise, and then she roared insolently, revealing rows and rows of rotten yellowed teeth. "Trespassing? Your lands? You are --- Sesseika?!"  
  
Hahaue just smirked in response. "Though I would hardly think it possible, it appears your stupidity even overshadows your ugliness! I am the Lady Sesseika. You should **know** my name, afterall, you have been raiding our province far too frequently of late. Are you saying you had no clue that you have intruded on the lands of my great husband, Inu no Taisho?"  
  
"Feh! Inu No Taisho! Yes, I have most certainly heard of HIM!" the demoness smiled sarcastically. "Funny, that he should not be here with you now? I shouldn't suppose he is also out defending another ragged band these weak human creatures at the present? I wonder why? Perhaps, my lady, he sees something else entirely in them?" Her wicked gaze roamed over the frightened humans once more, becoming fixed on a pretty young human girl that lay sobbing weakly against a tree. "Yes, Inu no Taisho. Indeed, I have heard tales of soft heart and his --- ahem --- soft appetites!"  
  
Hahaue responded with a curt nod, but from his hiding place in the tree bows he thought he saw her face color in a mixture of embarrassment, disbelief, and pained suspicion. He gasped, utterly perplexed. Just what was that gross old demon implying?  
  
He didn't have time to ponder those strange words any further, in the next instant, his mother had simply vanished, to reappear directly in the mocking face of the laughing centipede. Her hand snapped forward in a flash of green and her claws plunged savagely into that awful grey, scabby flesh, raking out half of the centipede's beady, black eyes.  
  
The creature collapsed to the earth screaming, partially blinded and writhing in pain.  
  
"Be silent!" Hahaue screamed. "And be grateful as well! Afterall, I would have plucked out your lying tongue, if only you weren't half so foul!"  
  
"Forgive me, mistress! Mercy please, my lady!" the centipede moaned, begging for her very life and wriggling submissively along the ground.  
  
His mother sighed, slowly lowering her clenched fist. "Very well. Go now. But the day you ever set ONE foot on the boundary of these Lands again, that day shall be your very last."  
  
The creature hissed in anger and lashed her tail defiantly, causing the cringing humans to leap back again in fear. With one last hateful look, she began to slowly back away.  
  
Hahaue watched the centipede demoness go. Her lovely face was cold, impassive and emotionless. "**Sesshoumaru**," she barked out, suddenly snapping out of her contemplation.  
  
He jumped in surprise, not used to hearing her speak his full name in a manner so harsh. Her elegant eyebrows were furrowed together as if something were weighing greatly upon her and her dark lips were set into a grim line. He looked around in confusion, shifting his feet reluctantly, trying to remember if he might have done something to displease her. "Hahaue?"  
  
"Sesshoumaru, follow me. Now."  
  
His mother did not look at him, but strode steadily off, heading in the same direction the centipede demoness had fled. "There is something I wish for you to see, my love," she called out in that same icy, dead tone. He lowered his head and raced off after her, trying in vain to keep up with her swift pace.  
  
She appeared to be nothing more than a white blur as she wove through the dense screen of trees ahead. All he could smell was the retreating youkai, as its rancid blood and ichor formed a foul, heavy trail coating the ground. He had just come to the crest of a small canyon when he finally heard her call out to him again. "Stay right there Sesshoumaru --- do not come any closer!" She rushed back to his side, caught his pointed chin in her hand and forced his head upwards, fixing him with her piercing, withering gaze. "Do not come closer, but do **NOT** look away either! I wish for you to see what I must do now."  
  
With that she whirled around and resumed hunting her quarry.  
  
The final chase was over far too quickly. Bounding athletically from rock to rock along the wall of the ravine, Hahaue easily overtook the wounded beast within the next few moments. The centipede screamed as soon as it saw her lightning fast charge, but whether it was fear or outrage that prompted that terrible wail, he could not tell. The creature looped around to make its last stand, swooping low to engulf the dog-demoness in its slimy coils.  
  
"No!" he shouted, his golden eyes darting in absolute terror to fix helplessly on the place where she had stood. The hideous centipede youkai did not even seem to notice his cry at all, as she stared down in surprise at her seemingly vulnerable and powerless opponent. A great gurgling laugh issued from her throat as she gloated, thinking she had managed to destroy this threat. "Ha! To imagine I might have run from something so pitiful as you! Stupid bitch! The great Sesseika-**SAMA**, indeed?! You were all talk, weren't you, you arrogant hound ---" The centipede's words were halted in mid-insult and her face contorted in an unmistakable grimace of great pain. Her fat coils bulged outward, and her mottled skin ripped into shreds as a loud baying howl resounded through the air, echoing through the ravine.  
  
In the next instant, the creature's wriggling flesh exploded under a blast of tremendous youki and a monstrous white dog stood to tower over her.  
  
From his position at the summit of the gulch, he jumped back in shock --- he had seen his mother's transformation countless times before. But he had never seen her so frenzied in this, her altered state. The lust for blood had never filled her usually kind and loving eyes so completely. Hahaue's steely jaws clamped down upon her foe and she shook the centipede like it were nothing more than a pile of rags.  
  
When her jaws finally opened again, it was only to reposition her hold and to clench her sharp teeth around the miserable beast's throat. Her long talons tore at its already broken body and she threw her enemy down into the cliff-side with just the slightest snap of her great shaggy head.  
  
He closed his young eyes for one second, appalled by the slaughter and carnage, then remembered her sharp words and dutifully stared back at the battle. In that one instant he had looked away, he found his mother had transformed again, and was now standing on the field in her customary state. Her slender form shimmered with her power. Flawless. Faultless. Soaked in blood.  
  
The dying centipede screamed defiantly one last time.  
  
Hahaue advanced slowly upon it, her sword drawn and held at the ready. "**Odamari!** Shut up! Fool am I? You are the fool!" she mocked callously. "Did you honestly think **I** would be so easy to kill?" She leapt into the air and slashed the centipede's foul head from its shoulders with a single blow. That great bloated body shuddered one last time then fell still.  
  
Hahaue stood growling, and lowered her sword somewhat reluctantly as she stared down at her vanquished foe with absolute loathing. He approached her warily, his steps slow and unsteady. He felt more than a bit frightened and puzzled. His mother's eyes were the same brilliant red as the hot blood staining her claws, and the wide stripes on her cheeks had become ragged slashes of deepest violet that extended nearly to the corners of her full lips.  
  
"Hahaue?" he questioned in a small voice, rather intimidated by her uncontrolled fury. He was confused as to why she should wish him to observe such a violent, sadistic spectacle. But equally perplexing was the fact that she had promised this demon mercy and compassion, only to hunt her down with a brutality he had never before witnessed. "Why, Mother?" he murmured. "I thought you told her she was free to leave? I don't understand."  
  
She drew in a shallow, panting breath. "I know, my son. But this is not the first time she has invaded our lands. I could not allow her to escape. She had young --- I could smell them on her. One day, she might have returned with all of them."  
  
She glanced sorrowfully down at her dripping claws. "Yes, she would have returned again. Just as I would have done if anyone had harmed you," she whispered, her voice solemn and nearly inaudible. She took his small hand in her own.  
  
"Our lands, our lives --- the lives of those that we love --- you must always remember, Sesshoumaru, that others will take great pleasure in destroying them." She stared impassively at the smoking, mangled corpse of the centipede. "This creature would have returned with nothing but vengeance consuming her mind and hate eating away at her heart. She would have come back seeking revenge on US."  
  
Hahaue fixed him with a hard, unremorseful look. "What would I do if she returned seeking the life of your Great Father? And what if she tried to claim YOUR life, my treasure? You, the one I adore more than any other?" She tousled his wind-blown hair, and then cleaned her sword on the ground, wiping the gore on a tuft of grass. "That is something I would never permit. I will never allow anyone harm you."  
  
When she turned back to him again, the gentle warmth had crept back into her eyes and he laughed then. "Hahaue," he chided obstinately, as if he thought her fears were the silliest thing in the world. "No one can ever harm me! You are TOO fierce! Everyone is afraid of you! Sometimes even Chichiue, I think!" He paused with a look of deep consideration and then fixed her with a smug look. "One day I will be as strong as you!"  
  
She smiled and kissed the crest on his forehead. "That's right, my son. You will be strong. But remember --- **NEVER** reveal any weakness to your enemies. One day these lands will be yours. And I..." her next words were interrupted as the frightened humans she had rescued raced into the dry ravine. Once again, they surrounded the elegant taiyoukai, shouting out great sycophantic cries of thankfulness and appreciation.  
  
_"Thank you again, my Lady!"  
  
"You've saved us once more!"  
  
"Why, is that the young Lord!? How quickly he has grown! He looks just like his father! How handsome he will be!"  
_  
He backed up at the over-flattering words and actions of these strange creatures, finding himself rather sickened and unnerved by the way they stared at him so dotingly. The pretty young woman that the centipede had pointed out collapsed at his feet, babbling out weepy, incoherent phrases of gratitude.  
  
Hahaue growled menacingly, pulling the woman back a bit more fiercely than she probably needed to. For an instant, he saw the same look of confusion and doubt flash over her features as when her defeated foe had mocked her about his Father's intense interest in these humans.  
  
"Release my son at once! Show some respect to the future master of these Lands! And do not mistake the motives behind my actions," she shouted vehemently, whirling to face the small crowd, anger and hurt building in golden her eyes again. "I am not of the same disposition as my lord husband. I have been hunting that beast for months. You --- **ningen me**! You were all merely lucky this time."  
  
Suddenly, everything shifted and faded in a haze of white.

* * *

Bright sunlight and the din of raucous seabirds brought a rude end to Sesshoumaru's strange dream. That had been hundreds of years ago, he mused. Odd that he should remember **THAT** day now. With a low moan of protest, he burrowed further under the covers, seeking to simultaneously hide from the blinding glare, to drown out the piercing racket and to shift his thoughts back into the present. He turned slowly, and found himself snuggling closer to the delicious warmth at his side that was --- _his human_. His Rin.  
  
He jerked upright abruptly, rapidly blinking the sleep from his eyes. _That's right. Last night --- they had ---  
_  
Sesshoumaru looked down upon the lovely young girl, as if half expecting last night's events to have been no more than another strange, vivid dream as well. Rin's head was thrown back, one arm laying across her own forehead, the other still draped snugly about his waist. Those long-lashed eyelids were closed, and her breathing was measured and even.  
  
_Good, he had not disturbed her. The little thing was still fast asleep._  
  
He reached out to gently trace the contours of one smooth cheek with his claw. At the light contact, the young woman's eyes drifted open. Despite all that had transpired the night before, she appeared somewhat astounded to find him leaning over her and he heard her breath catch in her throat. A mere moment later, however, she had reached up to absently run her small fingers lovingly along his jaw ---  
  
As if suddenly taken aback by her own boldness, the girl tried to yank her hand away in embarrassment, but the demon was far too quick and caught her wrist easily. Propping himself up on his elbow, he stared down at her face curiously for another long moment. "Do not --- it is alright. You do not have to stop," Sesshoumaru finally mumbled in a hoarse voice as he sunk back into the blankets again.  
  
Rin cast him an adoring look as he released her hand. Delighted at his somewhat groggy words of encouragement, she cuddled closer still, reaching to trail her fingers along his lower lip next. "Well --- good morning to you too," she whispered sweetly.  
  
Sesshoumaru turned his head towards the window, and drew in a deep yawning breath that ended in an odd, rather animalistic, whine. "I should think good afternoon would be more appropriate," he commented matter-of-factly.  
  
Rin's grin widened, not sure what amused her more --- his flat, sarcastic comment or that strange noise he had just made. "Yes, I am sorry --- I guess I have slept-in late."  
  
"Quite late," he replied easily. "Though, I suppose this Sesshoumaru should be grateful that at least now it has stopped raining!"  
  
At that casual reminder of the weather, Rin merely grunted at the sun in annoyance and rolled to her side, great waves of her hair spilling carelessly over her pretty face.  
  
Most astonishingly, Sesshoumaru found himself smiling in response to her uncharacteristically irritated and charmingly lethargic reactions. "Was last night so exhausting? Do not tell me that you are still sleepy?"  
  
The young woman snorted in reply. "Rin is not sleepy --- Rin --- is just --- comfortable." One hazel eye cracked open just a fraction to glower at the bright sunlight again, as she heaved a lazy yawn.  
  
"This Sesshoumaru knows the perfect way to wake you up," he offered seductively, placing a hard kiss on her throat.  
  
Rin blushed profusely, even as her hands moved immediately to rest on his broad shoulders to draw him closer. She giggled at his lusty behavior. "My lord! You are --- you are terrible!" she teased.  
  
Sesshoumaru stiffened instantly. _Terrible?_ His thoughts immediately flashed to his words and conduct the night before. Though he knew the girl merely spoke in jest about his present amorous actions, those innocently spouted words were just too damn --- _too damn uncomfortable.  
_  
Rin felt him tense beside her and looked up to search his face in concern. "My lord, what is it? Did I say something wrong?"  
  
The demon's eyes narrowed. "No. It is nothing --- nothing." For some reason, his throat felt painfully tight. Sesshoumaru spared a quick glance down at the bedding, feeling a new surge of guilt as his eyes fell upon a small spot of blood staining the blankets. _Yes_, he would definitely have to tell her about his true intentions and his decisions for their future together --- and --- and soon.  
  
But **NOT** now when he was too thoroughly contented, and perfectly satisfied to just lay here with her strangely cool body pressed tightly against him. Perhaps he could tell her tomorrow or the day after that? Maybe?  
  
Sesshoumaru reached out to carefully clasp her chin between two long fingers, and pulled her in again for a lasting kiss. All thoughts and doubts were chased away as he felt her begin to tremble. "How --- how do you feel?" he asked when they finally broke apart several long minutes later.  
  
Rin stretched languorously and kicked at the tangled bed-covers. "I feel perfect!" she answered rather giddily.  
  
"Not sore?" the demon asked, fingers brushing over her thigh in the barest hint of a caress. Another shiver trailed down her spine and Rin smiled playfully, rather glad she had pouted and insisted that they remain in bed.  
  
"A bit," she replied in all honesty. "But --- but not enough that --- well --- if you REALLY wanted to do --- all --- that --- again, I mean, I could ---" She squirmed in embarrassment and stared blankly towards the wall.  
  
Sesshoumaru shook his head, and smiled tenderly, imagining how hard it must be for one so shy make such a blatant invitation. Despite himself, he couldn't help but feel captivated by her naiveté. _Listen to her! 'Do all that'?_ Even now, she was still so damn innocent and adorable. He moved to stroke his hand across her back, and pictured how fiercely she would blush when he finally explained the proper terminology of these new acts to her.  
  
Caught in the moment and slightly dazed by the intensity of his current expression, Rin quickly pressed a swift, chaste kiss to his lips. "Ummm, what now? What should we do today?"  
  
"We should do as little as possible," he answered vaguely, his eyes never leaving her mouth.  
  
Rin eyes widened at his far too hungry look. "That sounds --- nice. But I think I should like a bath," she declared, looking over her form with a small frown.  
  
The taiyoukai leaned closer, his words a breath of temptation across her face. "A bath? Then this Sesshoumaru will join you. Afterall, you interrupted mine with your deliberate, bold STARING last night ---"  
  
Rin blushed again, but felt no real need to protest. _A bath --- with him?!_ She shivered with delight at this thoroughly exciting prospect of further shared intimacy, and leapt animatedly from the bed.  
  
The taiyoukai followed her progress with his eyes. The girl was shouting out some utterly cheery nonsense song, while scampering around his room to retrieve her scattered clothing. Gods - what a difference a few hours made. Rin seemed perfectly relaxed and confident to be in such close proximity now --- she no longer appeared to be self-conscious of her body at all. Sesshoumaru inclined his head to admire the perfect view as she dropped her gown to the floor then turned to raid his wardrobes. She rifled through his old garments, singing to herself all the while.  
  
"What are you doing, Aijin?" he asked.  
  
"Nothing. Well, it's just --- these clothes are easier! It was kind of hard to move in that other thing!" She pointed at the discarded gown. "I mean --- it's beautiful! But how can I follow you through the woods if I'm constantly tripping on some long, trailing scrap of silk!"  
  
"Follow this Sesshoumaru?" he echoed. "Am I to understand that you wish to travel again?" He slowly rose from bed to stand behind her.  
  
The demon watched impassively as the young woman turned in surprise to take in his form for the first time in the full light of day. She blushed timidly, only for a second --- then, with increasing sureness, allowed her gaze to trail over the length of his body. When Rin finally met his eyes again, she was smiling as if lost in a rather pleasant memory. _Probably the same one he was recalling at that very moment as well,_ he mused.  
  
She shook her head slowly and licked her lips, trying to remember what they had been discussing before she had been distracted. "Well, what else would we do, my lord? We always wander! You, me, Aun and --- and even Jaken-sama! I wonder what we'll see together this time!" Her tone had taken on that exuberant, bubbling edge he hadn't heard in far too many years. He found himself turning to hide his own smile.  
  
"Yes," Rin concluded absently, not looking back at him. "All I want is to follow you again. And though the kimono are all beautiful, they're most definitely only for around here! And besides --- I kind of preferred wearing your old clothes anyway!" She resumed pawing through his belongings as if they were her own.  
  
The demon lord shook his head in wonder, silver hair rippling down to his calves. "Is that a fact?" he responded, finding himself amazingly caught up in her lighthearted mood. "Well --- this Sesshoumaru simply forbids you to traipse around the countryside in nothing more than an old haori."  
  
"Well, then perhaps, my lord, you would be so kind and generous to provide me with THIS outgrown hakama as well?" She blinked sweetly, holding up a pair that seemed like they might fit.  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled his eyes at her selection. _White, of course. Gods --- how old had he been when he could fit in that damn thing, anyway?_ He squinted at the fabric, amazed that he hadn't gotten rid of something so damn old_. He couldn't have been a day over twenty five when he was able to fit in those! _The demon was temporarily lost in thought as he was suddenly reminded about his peculiar dream. He couldn't dismiss the fact that his entire childhood extended for decades longer than this girl's **WHOLE** life span might have if she were still fully mortal.  
  
"Come here," he stated somewhat coldly.  
  
Rin blinked, wondering what had happened. Sesshoumaru-sama had been responding to her cheery mood so well. She couldn't remember saying anything that would cause this sudden look of melancholy or that frigid snap in his tone.  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama? What is it ---" She never got to finish her words as she found herself dragged back to bed and into the blankets  
  
"Things will be different now," he began sadly. "Things HAVE to be different now. If you wish to follow this Sesshoumaru again, you must make a promise."  
  
"A promise?"  
  
"When I give an order, you must obey. There can be no more of this sentimental foolishness. **No** displays of weakness. You have to remember that we have many enemies."  
  
"Weakness?" she echoed desolately, as if she hadn't heard his other words.  
  
"The --- affection --- you feel for this Sesshoumaru. You cannot allow it to blind you to danger any longer."  
  
"But, my lord, I-I think that is the whole point of being in love."  
  
"Never-the-less," he stated absently. "I would have your promise."  
  
Rin gulped, wishing that she knew how the mood had become so sour after all the joy and pleasure she had known the night before.  
  
Sesshoumaru's long fingers tightened about her upper arms, the sharp points of his claws digging into her skin just slightly. His beautiful eyes searched hers. "Onegai?" he whispered.  
  
That soft, small pleading word killed any further protest or argument she might have had. Her throat had gone strangely dry, but still she managed to choke her response out. "Y-yes, my lord. I p-promise. Y-yakusoku shimasu."  
  
As if oblivious to her halting, somewhat hurt tone, the taiyoukai flashed a quick, triumphant smile, perfectly satisfied that the matter was fully resolved. He sighed deeply. "That is it then. You will remain with this Sesshoumaru. These Lands are your home. You can take or discard whatever you wish --- but --- will you keep these? Always." Sesshoumaru reached behind the pillows and Rin smiled as he held out those two ornate silver combs. She gasped at the gesture. Though the combs had already been presented to her, the gift was suddenly so much more real, tender and poignant as she received it from his OWN hand.  
  
"Thank you --- of course, I will always wear these." The girl stared down wistfully at the jewels in her hand. "They are too beautiful --- they are almost too much."  
  
Rin felt the unmistakable building of tears and looked up to search his face again to memorize his expression. Sesshoumaru's smile was typically haughty and smug. But, though at first glance it would appear he seemed far too pleased with himself, she couldn't help but note that his eyes were soft and his lashes were half-lowered in shy, self-conscious embarrassment.  
  
Rin gasped. _Was that --- was that the same look she'd seen the hanyou direct at Kagome so many times?_ Sesshoumaru caught her contemplative gaze and quickly turned away.  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama, will you --- kiss me?!" she cried out, leaning in to him in invitation. He blinked and turned back to her, but the caring look she had been hoping to see again was gone, replaced by something darker.  
  
"Kuchizuke wo ageru zo!" he growled savagely, rolling her unto his lap.  
  
Suddenly, both their head shot up in alarm, as a loud, panting squawk came echoing down the corridor. "Sesshoumaru-sama!!!! Oh my lord! Come quick! This Jaken has looked everywhere! It is Rin --- Rin is **GONE**!!!"  
  
Sesshoumaru brushed his heavy bangs away from his eyes. His expression was utterly amused as his glance shifted from the girl above him to the toad's silhouette, arms now flailing frantically outside the door.  
  
Rin failed to see the humor in the situation; she was desperate and anxious about how the discovery of her presence here might play out. She covered her mouth to stifle her worried groan.  
  
Jaken waited outside his master's bedchamber, tapping his clawed feet against the wooden floor as he tightened his grip on the Nintojou. His lord was NOT rousing quickly enough! Perhaps he should convey the true seriousness of the situation. Perhaps he should confess that he shared some rather strong liquor with the girl last night! The tiny youkai clapped his three-fingered hand to his warty face, as visions of his indiscretion and the previous evening's sake drinking episode replayed in his mind.  
  
Damn --- even before Rin had begun drinking, she **HAD** been rather emotional and upset! What if the little ningen girl did something foolish in her addled state --- something utterly ridiculous like wandering off the cliffs or tumbling into the waves or skipping merrily off the grounds and into the jaws of some nasty youkai!  
  
Jaken scowled. Over the years, she'd proven herself prone to falling into those very situations anyway, even despite his best attempts to play protector and chaperone!!! He didn't even want to imagine what other forms of trouble she could get into while intoxicated! As his thoughts grew increasingly morbid, he suddenly pictured his master cleaving him in two with Toukijin, rather than the Tenseiga this time.  
  
"My lord!" the toad moaned in terror, banging his fist on the doorframe. "I went to rouse the lazy little thing but – but she was not in her room! In fact, her bed was not slept in at all!"  
  
He paced back and forth rapidly. _Still --- nothing. No signs of movement!  
  
_In a pique of frazzled nerves, Jaken yanked the screen open without waiting for further permission to enter, seeking to throw himself at his master's knees to plead for mercy. "It is all this Jaken's fault!" The small youkai's wails were ceased instantly by a shrill, piercing and obviously female shriek. His head jerked up to the horrible sight of his missing charge, naked and draped rather lewdly across his master's lap.  
  
"GET OUT!!!" Sesshoumaru barked in outrage, pressing Rin tighter to his chest and pulling the blankets up to protect her modesty. Both the toad and the girl had clamped their hands over their eyes in unqualified mortification.  
  
Jaken stumbled back, fumbling for the doorway blindly. "Oh dear! I mean --- I didn't know --- I mean you hate humans! Well, I mean I KNOW you don't hate this girl, but --- well, you do not like her more than she deserves --- " the toad stuttered. "I mean, I thought this might happen but ---"  
  
"**DETE IKE!!!** I SAID GET OUT!" Sesshoumaru bellowed once more.  
  
As the door slid closed again, Rin looked up sheepishly, suddenly afraid of how her master would respond to Jaken's flustered reaction. She didn't imagine THIS was the way he'd prefer his long time servant to discover the remarkable change in their relationship. In all honesty, the young woman wasn't exactly thrilled herself. She tucked the blankets around her chest and waited for her master to say something.  
  
When Sesshoumaru finally did speak, his first statement did nothing to relieve her amazement and shock. His imperious voice boomed out, his words directed NOT at her, but at the rapidly retreating toad. "Jaken!" he shouted. "Make yourself useful and draw a bath! Then begin moving this girl's belongings to this chamber. It is **hers** now as well."

* * *

Sango sighed in exasperation as Kaisei spit her food out in obvious protest. At the current moment, the taijiya mused, her child had MORE 'breakfast' on her chin then in her belly. _Kami --- the stubborn little thing was such a finicky eater!_ And, what was worse, her fussy behavior had grown to extend beyond her poor table manners and eating habits of late --- especially now that she sensed her parents were about to leave her again! Kaisei was a clever little girl, and Sango couldn't help but note that her large violet eyes were firmly fixed on the Hiriakotsu rather than the contents of her bowl right now.  
  
The weak, watery glow of the early winter sun filled the modest hut. They had hoped to leave at daybreak, but --- but daybreak had long since past. Things weren't quite so simple as when they had first embarked on their quest to regain the Shikon no Tama. There were so many more responsibilities and so many new things to worry about now. With a pained look, Sango hurriedly pulled her daughter out of her rumpled nightclothes. Kaisei continued to resist her, squirming and wriggling to get down to the floor where Kirara waited, sprawled on the cool stones of the hearth. The fire-cat mewled impatiently, hoping to receive the child's leftovers.  
  
"NO, no --- down!" the toddler cried grumpily.  
  
"Yes --- yes, down." The demon exterminator repeated with a sigh, silently cursing the day her sweet little girl had first learned the word '_NO_'. "But hold still, sweet! Oh, little girl --- where is your Father?"  
  
Kaisei turned towards the doorway, grinning broadly. "Touchan!?" she asked, gesturing outside with her chubby fist.  
  
Sango's mildly disapproving maternal look disappeared at that word and at the delighted look currently lighting her child's face. She brushed at her damp eyes, filling sick with herself for acting like this was all too much. The mundane 'drudgery' of domestic life was no burden, really. Afterall, this would be the last morning at home until --- until she just couldn't say. Within the hour, they would all depart for the Northern Lands, and travel to Kouga's domain, and --- and were they to really encounter Naraku, who knew when she would see her daughter again. If ever.  
  
The child smiled up at HER now, bored with waiting at the entryway for her errant father. As she tried to goad her mother into a chase, or, at the very least, a tickle fight, Sango was forced to turn her head fully to mask her many tears.  
  
_This couldn't go on much longer._  
  
Not just for her daughter's sake but --- but for Miroku's as well. Just how much time did she have left with her husband anyway? Sango numbly remembered how aggressively she had pressed Mushin in private with questions about the young priest's father and his tragically early demise. How old was HE when he was consumed by his Kazaana? How much warning did HE have?  
  
The one question she didn't have to ask was whether or not his death was quick or agonizingly slow. Afterall, by now, she had SEEN the answer on occasions too numerous to count and witnessed the horrible truth every time Miroku opened his own wind tunnel. How the enemy would fight and scream, resisting till the last of their strength was sapped, and they were shredded into pieces to disappear down into hell --- never to be seen again. It was pure, terrifying agony for the victim. And --- and if things did not change soon, SHE would have to witness that same fear in HIS eyes when he was ultimately consumed by his own curse.  
  
Her sinister thoughts were interrupted by a small groan behind her.  
  
Sango turned to look down at the source of the noise, eyes immediately fixing on Kohaku in concern._ Damn!_ She'd caught him wincing in pain for too many days now, and she watched in helpless frustration as he put down his own breakfast bowl to press his hands tightly against his temples.  
  
"Kokaku?" she questioned, as he slumped over by the fireside. She raced to his aid, brushing his hands away impatiently to press her own fingers against his burning forehead. "Kohaku? What's wrong? You're not eating? Are you still feeling unwell?"  
  
"Don't worry, Aneue. I'm alright," the boy murmured, staring morosely off into the east. He reached up and loosened the collar of his leather battle- gear, and pulled the tie free from his high, tight pony-tail, releasing his damp, sweaty hair to spill down past his shoulders. _Gods_ --- his back was killing him again, and he felt so drained, as though he had just raced for miles upon miles without stop.  
  
"What hurts?" Sango pressed on. She reached out again to tap her finger against his lightly freckled nose wishing to see him smile again, if only for a moment. "Can I get Kaede-sama to prepare some medicine? Or perhaps we can ask Kagome for some of the remedies from her own world?"  
  
Kohaku forced a small, fatigued grin. "No, no --- It's nothing. I'll be fine."  
  
"Alright," Sango answered uneasily, returning to inspect her weapons and poison shield. The apprehensive woman turned and noted the high position of the sun with growing dread. Any minute now, she would get the call and they would all be on their way. She folded her hands and babbled on easily, mostly just to make herself feel a little less wretched inside. "Inuyasha wants to depart for the northern mountains at once, you know. It will be an exhausting trip. Not just because of the length of the journey, but because when we arrive we'll have to listen to those two bicker constantly!"  
  
The young woman released her first genuine laugh that whole morning. "Honestly, despite **ALWAYS** possessing Kagome's heart and love --- the way our hanyou still gets around that wolf! I mean, that demon's been happily settled for years now, but Inuyasha will just never forget that Kouga FIRST had designs on HIS little miko --- before he accepted the rather _'insistent and aggressive'_ proposal of the Lady Ayame's clan, that is!"  
  
She cast another fond glance over their humble home, seeking to memorize every tiny detail, right down to the very grain of the polished floorboards, before continuing in her light voice. "Gods --- Inuyasha will never trust Kouga!" she repeated for emphasis, trying to snap her focus back into the upcoming journey.  
  
"Funny, _isn't it then_, that the half-breed should be **SO** careless as to trust me?" Kohaku muttered thickly under his breath. He ran a flat stone along the edge of his sickle blade with deliberate slowness.  
  
Sango looked up in sudden bewilderment, cringing slightly at the high- pitched, scraping noise of the sharpening tool. _Did her brother just say what she thought he said? Did she hear him right? Just now, Kohaku's voice had become so dead --- so empty._ Her eyes narrowed in unease as she observed that his hands were moving ever so strangely; they were trembling almost as if he had no control over them at all!  
  
"What did you say?" she finally gasped, completely taken aback by his rather gloomy, ominous words and odd actions. "Kohaku --- are you sure you don't want to go to Kaede's?"  
  
The young man shook his head with a start, his eyes and expression instantaneously clear and contrite. "Hmmmm? Oh – nothing, Aneue. I don't know where that comment came from, really," he mumbled. "Bad joke, I suppose."  
  
Sango rose to her feet and hurriedly finished packing her supplies, then moved to clear away the rest of the morning meal. She wiped off Kaisei's tiny bamboo spoon with an especially sharp pang of regret, and placed it in a small travel bag to bring to Kaede's home. _Gods --- how she envied every moment every moment the old miko got to spend with her child while she was off fighting._ With a small sigh, she grabbed a wet cloth and moved to clean the chubby toddler herself, pulling the little girl away from the now purring Kirara and into her own lap again.  
  
"I can't believe I have to leave her again so soon," she murmured, cuddling her daughter impossibly close. "Especially after all that happened last time."  
  
Kaisei stirred and looked up at her mother's soft words, reaching out to pat her cheek, while babbling happily about her 'kitty'. Sango lay her battle-scarred hand on the child's head, then ran her fingers through her glossy black hair.  
  
"Kaisei favors our family, doesn't she?" she commented. She nudged her brother's shoulder firmly, seeking to keep him from withdrawing again. Kohaku's eyes shot open in utter surprise, and she couldn't help but notice how strangely out of focus they appeared to be.  
  
"Huh? Oh --- un, but she has her father's eyes," he answered quietly. "The boys will chase after her one day."  
  
**"Boys?"** came a deeper, slightly panicked male voice from the doorway. "SHE will not be allowed near THEM until she is twenty."  
  
Sango's eyebrows arched as Miroku finally entered the hut. "Ha! Listen to these ridiculous rules coming from the most corrupt pervert of all time!"  
  
"Once again your words wound me, my beautiful wife." The handsome priest reached down to scoop up the giggling child dancing excitedly at his feet. With his free arm, he pulled Sango to his side, nuzzling his face into her fragrant hair.  
  
Kohaku grinned at their flirting and tender embrace at first, and then turned away as he heard a soft sob. He watched sadly as the houshi tightened his desperate grip around his sister's trembling shoulders. The moment was very bitter but, somehow, he found he couldn't help but feel so very happy for his older sibling as well, despite the grim outlook of her fate. In her late teenage years, at the height of her profession, he remembered how Sango had often been too serious, severe and grave --- _almost too damn joyless_. This irreverent young priest gave her so much love. Miroku had made her happy again, if only for a short while.  
  
Kohaku's look darkened. _Yes_, Sango had found happiness again, even despite all HE had done under Naraku's evil control.  
  
_Despite all he had done?!_ _**Come now, Kohaku,**_ a sinister voice in his mind suddenly whispered. **_What did you REALLY do that was so terrible?_  
**  
_What do you mean? I-I killed my own father_, he answered in shock.  
  
_**Yes, but wasn't Father always so harsh, so critical? Really, didn't he deserve to die?**_  
  
Kohaku cried out and dropped a simple earthenware plate with a resounding clatter. _What? Where the hell did THAT thought come from?_ He swayed on his feet and nearly swooned.  
  
In an instant, both Sango and Miroku were at his side.  
  
"See --- you are sick!" his sister chided testily. "Is that wound in your leg, the one from Sesshoumaru, is it still infected? Come here! I think you have a fever!" She cast a quick glance up at her husband for support. Miroku's eyes were filled with confusion and sincere concern as well. "Kohaku-kun," he whispered patiently. "Maybe Sango is right. Maybe you should stay behind. At least --- at least until you're feeling well enough to travel."  
  
Kohaku collapsed weakly into his sleeping pallet. "Yeah, I think --- maybe you're right."  
  
At that moment, Shippou burst past the reed mat covering the doorway. "You guys all set?" he questioned. The kitsune flashed a wry, sneaky grin and let out a conspiratorial whisper. "Afterall, WAN-CHAN NO OU-SAMA is ready to go."  
  
"Wan-Chan no Ou-sama?" Sango repeated. "The king of the puppies?"  
  
"Yeah," Shippou answered flippantly. "My new secret name for Inuyasha! Damn - he is in a foul mood today. And all because of the prospect of dealing with ---" The fox's deep voice trailed off and, in an instant, his shape shifted and he transformed into a perfect replica of Kagome. "All because prospect of dealing with ---- _Kouga-**kuuuun**_!" he whined in a falsetto voice, a perfect imitation of the miko's own. There was a loud resounding pop as he once again resumed his true form and flopped down next to Kohaku. "Ha! You would have loved it!" he laughed, nudging his friend in the ribs. "Inuyasha even got under Kagome's skin! She even tried to **sit** him once --- though the necklace is history! Between his nerves and her hormones --- bwa ha ha ha!" The kitsune's emerald eyes settled on his surprisingly silent best-friend. "Hey Kohaku-kun? What's the matter with you? You look like hell!"  
  
Kohaku smiled weakly then closed his eyes again with another soft groan. Shippou shot a rather worried glance up at Miroku and Sango.  
  
Sango's breath exploded in an angry huff. "He's not feeling well and he won't go to Kaede's like I told him to! Maybe **YOU **can talk some sense into him, Shippou-kun."  
  
"Is that true, Kohaku?" the fox asked. "Maybe, I should wait here with you --- for a few hours, at least."  
  
"No --- you go, Shippou," the young man rasped, readjusting his blankets about him and turning into the wall. "Please, I'll be alright. If Kouga is correct --- if he really knows where Naraku is hiding --- then you'd better get to him as soon as possible. It's fine. This probably is just another fever brought on by the wound in my leg." He sat up swiftly. "Just leave Kaisei with me. She'll probably be more comfortable here in our own home for the night. Tomorrow, when my strength returns, I'll bring her to Kaede's, and then I'll come after you."  
  
Sango knelt down beside him. "Alright, my brother, but please only follow us if you're feeling better? Do I have your word?"  
  
Kohaku snorted up at his overprotective sibling. _That condescending, stifling, coddling, little show-off --- always telling HIM what to do!! _He gasped in surprise at his thoughts, but managed to keep his next words calm.  
  
"Of course, Aneue --- **WE**, I mean --- I promise."

* * *

Glossary:  
  
The names of the MY mini-invented characters – Kaisei is 'sea star' (figured Sango's name means 'coral' so why not!?) Sesseika means 'life destroying flower' (Whatever!)!  
  
Aneue – honored older sister  
  
Chichiue – honored father  
  
Dete ike – GET OUT!  
  
Hahaue – honored mother  
  
Kuchizuke wo ageru zo! – I'll GIVE you a kiss!  
  
Komusume – translated as 'little girl' but very derogatory as in "little bitch!" (Sesseika is general implying that the centipede has a bit of a weight problem. Can't imagine any 'woman' would be happy with that insult!)  
  
Ningen – human (I've used this 70 million times, I guess we all know what it means now!)  
  
Onore – you (very disrespectful, like "you bitch!")  
  
Touchan - "daddy"!

Yakusoku shimasu – I promise.

* * *

THANKS NOTOES! THANKS MANON! 


	20. Chapter 19

Guess What! This story actually got 2nd place in the IY Fan-fiction Guild's Winter 2004 Competition for Romance: Alternative Pairing! I'm just shocked --- I never expected it at all. Anyway, thanks to anyone who was forgiving enough to vote for me!

Several stories have been yanked from fanfiction . net over the past month. If this srory should just disappear it's also at mediaminer . org, and soupfiction . net, and the Sesshoumaru: Killing Perfection site. I'm working on finding a few more places to post this story!

Thanks for reading and thanks for your reviews!

**WARNING: Adult language!**

Chapter 19: Kazoku no Machigai

Kagome wound her slender arms about Inuyasha's shoulders, clinging tightly and struggling to steady herself while he bounded swiftly through the snowy forest. She sighed irritably. With her advancing pregnancy --- and her rapidly growing belly --- these days, the hanyou was forced to carry her in his arms rather than astride his back whenever they journeyed over long distances. She was still not at all used to this new manner of traveling, and looked up longingly at HER bow and quiver. They were now practically out of her reach and slung over HIS back instead of her own. Gods --- she had never realized just how reassuring it had felt to carry a weapon until it had been suddenly taken away! Kagome pursed her lips crossly, and tried to remind herself that Inuyasha wasn't particularly fond of this new position either. First of all, with her body clasped tightly before him, his daring leaps were not nearly so fluid or balanced as before. And with his hands occupied, wrapped snugly about her back and under her thighs, he was robbed of the ability to mount an instant attack. Yes - Inuyasha was obviously feeling just as vulnerable and out of control as she was!

Kagome sighed again, trying desperately to remember what it felt like to be in command of her life, of her body, and most importantly, of her hormones. She shifted slightly in the hanyou's arms, attempting to stretch her cramped legs and find a more comfortable pose.

It didn't help. She was numb, she was nauseous, she was dizzy, she was tired ---

Oh --- cut it out! she chided inwardly. This new hold did have its advantages too! Her lips curled in a small, optimistic smile as she sought, as usual, to find something positive and encouraging in any situation. First and foremost, she realized playfully, being cradled in Inuyasha's strong arms WAS powerfully personal and intimate --- and --- AND it gave her a much better view of his current mind and mood.

Kagome bit her lip and risked another quick glance upwards --- and right now, her hanyou was most definitely NOT very happy.

Ever since that last violent skirmish with Sesshoumaru, she mused, Inuyasha was as watchful and fussy as a mother hen. It seemed she had caught those striking amber eyes studying her face nearly every other minute of this whole, grueling six day journey. And then, every five minutes he was asking how she felt! AND then, every TEN he was seeking to confirm whether or not she was truly being honest and was really, REALLY comfortable!

Inuyasha was always insisting that the group stop for long, frequent breaks --- all and all, seeming to be a far cry from the arrogant, irritable, pushy young demon she had first met all those years ago. Deep down, she suspected he just liked making camp so he could listen to the baby's heart-beat in the eerie, depressing silence that usually followed whenever they paused in their travels.

She turned to stare absently at the bleak, icy landscape as it blurred past. Inuyasha HAD really wanted her to sit this one out and go home through the Bone Eater's Well till he'd returned from the Northern Lands with Kouga's latest news. She had even debated respecting his wish for a short time! After all, Shougatsu was fast approaching and there would soon be a flood of additional visitors at the shrine. Plus, she had promised to assist Jii-chan with the bookkeeping, and Souta had asked her to help him study for his college entrance exams. AND --- and then she needed to lend Mama a hand with painting and preparing the new nursery!

But after all these years, and after all the countless sacrifices she had made, she couldn't go back NOW. She HAD to know the truth. Could it really be possible that Kouga knew where Naraku was currently hiding? And --- and how? She had so, so many questions and chewed at her lip thoughtfully as she tried to sort through and make sense of them all.

A few of the more ominous and troubling rose to the forefront of her mind. For instance, if that evil half-demon was finally choosing to let his presence become known, what horrors did he have in store for them this time? And --- and what about Kikyou? Was the undead miko still aiding him and did their uneasy alliance still hold? Kagome shivered in dread and worried expectation. She immediately regretted that small tell-tale action as Inuyasha peered down to search her face curiously. The miko patted his arm for reassurance and threw the worried hanyou a gentle smile, inwardly resolved not to let her doubts manifest themselves in her expression anymore. They all had enough to worry about without burdening one another.

She cast her gaze over Inuyasha's shoulder, focusing on the grim faces of Sango and Miroku as they galloped beside them astride Kirara. The usually cheerful couple had also become far too quiet and anxious of late. They were withdrawn and introverted --- completely focused on their own relationship. It was almost as if they knew their time together was growing short and they were trying to fill each and every moment with memories of one another. Whenever they stopped, Kagome noted that the somber pair would distance themselves from the rest of their companions. They would huddle close together in the shadows, arms around each other's shoulders, speaking only in the barest of whispers ---

Kagome swallowed hard, rather terrified for her friends and their future prospects.

Especially Sango.

Maybe the taijiya would feel a little better when her brother finally joined them? Thoughts of the young demon slayer stuck back at the village caused her to search out Shippou, Kohaku's current closest companion and partner-in-crime. She quickly found the fox a second later, relieved to see that he at least seemed to be in higher spirits than the others.

Unburdened by any additional weight, Shippou was currently racing nimbly ahead of the somewhat agitated Kirara, bounding along at a blurry, break-neck pace that now nearly rivaled Inuyasha's own.

Gods --- just look how tall and handsome he's grown! Kagome mused, glad to have found something happy to focus on for a change. She recalled that bright, long ago morning when she and Inuyasha had first stumbled across the fox --- orphaned, alone, and rather unable to keep clear of danger.

Well, to this day, that last fact hadn't changed, she thought wryly. He still had a habit of finding trouble. True to form, as soon as the fox realized she was watching him, he shot in front of Inuyasha, smirking back smugly at the fairly surprised hanyou.

"Damn, old man, you're getting slow in your old age!" he quipped, flashing his fangs. He playfully allowed a small streak of kitsune-bi to build about his form and increased his pace.

Inuyasha's nostrils flared, but surprisingly, he did not speed up in response to Shippou's clear and obvious challenge. "I haven't gotten slower, GAKI --- just wiser!" he countered with a sarcastic grin, leaping quickly into the boughs of nearby tree, just as Shippou crashed abruptly to the ground, sliding ungracefully across a hidden patch of ice.

"Serves you right, runt!" the hanyou snorted over his shoulder as he passed the downed fox. Kagome was pleasantly surprised to hear Inuyasha chuckle, and the welcome sound was soon followed by easy laughter from Sango and Miroku. For just one second, it almost felt like the old days! When they were younger, less jaded --- when they felt confident they could win ---

Her latest thoughts were suddenly interrupted as a series of loud howls began to echo up the snowy valley, and the miko whirled back around just in time to see many sinister, shadowy forms dart from the woods to encircle them on all sides.

Wolves.

"Keh," Inuyasha snapped irritably, his words directed to nobody in particular. "Nice welcoming party, huh?"

They continued to travel north in total silence once again as still more wolves broke from the tree-line to lope menacingly alongside them. The creatures' howls built to an astonishing crescendo, their calls an unmistakable alarm to their masters that outsiders were currently intruding into their domain. It seemed the wolves were attempting to herd them toward the rest of the pack, but judging by the glint of fangs and vicious growls, they did not seem particularly fond of the task. Kagome was certain that if the beasts were not under Kouga's strict command, they would have had a real fight on their hands.

Not that these creatures were any match for Inuyasha, she mused with pride.

She chanced another quick glance upwards. From the hanyou's grim expression and the obvious tension in his shoulders, she could tell he was entertaining the very notion of taking them all on right now.

There was another quick, clipped call from further down the valley. Without warning, their bristling escort vanished as quickly as they'd appeared, fading from view as they leapt up into the grey rocks along a frozen streambed.

In just a few more short leaps, the group cleared a frozen gully behind the retreating wolves, and together they all stared at the impressive sight of a towering frozen waterfall as it glittered in the fading sunlight. The wolves that had been tracking their progress were now gathered in a tightly-knit, snarling cluster, standing guard about a narrow crevasse leading through the ice.

Scattered groups of ookami youkai came flooding out from behind the falls --- the last to emerge being a strikingly lovely young woman with flowing auburn hair, sea-green eyes and a rather drowsy-looking infant curled contentedly in her arms. With an unmistakable air of authority, she surveyed her assembled pack, seeming to be rather perturbed by the clamor and commotion. At the sight of her new guests, however, her annoyance quickly faded and her lips parted in a wide, and very relieved, grin. "Oh! So you have come!" she called down to the assembled party. "Welcome!"

The miko smiled up at the woman in return. "Ayame-chan," she shouted amiably. Kagome pushed free of Inuyasha's suddenly rather constrictive hold and scrambled up the smooth rocks to clasp the taller woman in a firm hug. The wolf cub in Ayame's arms squeaked in mild protest in response to her tight grip.

"Oh --- sorry!" Kagome crooned, releasing the laughing demoness just as Inuyasha and the rest of her companions arrived at her side. "Ayame --- is this your new little one?" The young miko reached out in fascination, rubbing the sleepy infant's tiny toes, her mind still whirling over the fact that she would have a baby of her own to cradle in just a few short months. As if the wolf-child instinctively realized he was being admired, his eyelids fluttered open. Kagome gasped and smiled down tenderly. "Oh, Ayame, please let me be the first to say he's absolutely lovely," she murmured, rather taken with his piercing blue eyes. "Why - he looks just like his father," she added with another grin, stepping back so that the others could get a look at the cub. The wolf-demoness beamed conceitedly, while Inuyasha muttered a quick jibe that sounded suspiciously like, 'Poor little bastard." Kagome turned back at him and glared, but quickly returned to staring at the child, too excited to really acknowledge the hanyou's little comment.

Fortunately, Ayame paid little heed to the sarcastic remark either. "If you think this one looks like my Kouga --- wait till you see the rest!" she answered excitedly, still glowing with a mother's pride. "They've grown quite a bit since the last time you were here!"

"Keh," Inuyasha huffed, his tone much louder this time. "Perfect. Just what the world needs. An army of pathetic yase ookami running wild!" Miroku elbowed him in the ribs as several nearby wolf-demons began mutter angrily while throwing them rather sour looks.

Ayame held up her hand to silence her pack, and then whirled around to cast the hanyou a probing and somewhat frustrated look. "Ohhh. Of course, it's going to be like this again, huh, Inuyasha? Shall we all place wagers as to how many minutes will pass before one of you has a black eye?" She laughed in exasperation and exchanged a knowing glance with Kagome. "If anyone has a right to be upset --- it should be the two of us! And, if WE could let this whole mess go, why can't you boys do the same?" She wagged her clawed finger under his nose sternly, and rolled her eyes when his defiant scowl persisted. "Fine --- suit yourselves!"

The demoness couldn't take the old feud too seriously. After all, there was nothing to be resentful over --- this ridiculous fight and petty jealously were never really about actually winning the heart of a certain particular person. It was just some stupid thing between powerful men who had somehow never quite grown-up! Just as she always did in the past, Ayame had decided it was best to ignore the immature rivalry. In anticipation of this little visit, she had already moved anything too fragile or precious out of her den. All she could do now was hope that no one ended up too badly bruised ---

"Please, come out of the freezing air! Come inside!" she offered politely. "Like I said there are a few MORE people I'd like you to meet!" The demoness eagerly ushered the cold, tired group under the frozen falls. The narrow doorway opened into a large, domed cave, which turned out to be surprisingly warm, cozy and dry, in spite of its great size and strange location. Ayame escorted them to the furthest corner of the cavern, down jagged, winding tunnels, and then on to a large den screened off by the tanned pelts of numerous youkai and forest-animals.

Kagome paused and drew a deep breath. Regardless of whatever momentous news Kouga was about to reveal, meeting with him was always an adventure enough in itself! Just as they were about to enter the partitioned room, a familiar whine filled her ears.

"Kagome-neesan!"

Kagome turned and smiled at the jovial faces of two young wolves as they raced to her side. At least some things didn't change, and, even after all these years, it was refreshing to know that Ginta and Hakkaku still accepted her warmly as one of their own! She tried unsuccessfully to hide her laughter as both demons blushed at their mistaken choice of wording and looked apologetically at Ayame. But the demoness only shrugged her shoulders casually and let the remark slide.

"Welcome, miko-sama! Kouga's been waiting to see you all for so long!" Hakkaku exclaimed, as Ginta nodded in agreement.

"Correct, boys!" Ayame stated loftily, moving to open the skins before the rough door frame. "Now if you'll excuse us, Kouga HAS waited long enough!"

"Ummmm --- gomen nasai, we don't mean to interrupt but --- Lady Ayame, may we speak to you for a moment!" Ginta stammered uneasily. "Our wolves --- they've spotted another trespasser moving across our lands and --- it's --- they've returned --- I think ---"

"Not here!" hissed Hakkaku, nudging dramatically towards their curious guests. "Kagome-nee --- er, Kagome-sama has only just arrived! They don't need to hear about 'OUR' problems!" Ginta flinched and nodded contritely, as Hakkaku turned back to address his leader's mate. "Can we speak to you in private, my Lady?"

Ayame's eyes narrowed suspiciously, as she registered the stirrings of genuine panic in her cousin's voice. "Oh, of course!" She turned politely back to Kagome, Inuyasha and the others. "Please, all of you --- go on without me! Kouga's inside --- I'll return in a moment!" She cuddled her infant closer and then offered a graceful bow to all of her guests. She paused to affectionately tug on a lock of Shippou's long red hair as she passed, hurriedly disappearing down the corridor after her shaken lieutenants.

Alone again, the companions stood in momentary confused silence outside the large den, now unable to avoid hearing the rabble of familiar voices issuing from within ---

"Now, everyone --- pay attention, all of you!" thundered a deep, gravelly voice that was most definitely Kouga's. "Listen to Touchan --- for very soon you will all be face-to-face with the ugliest, stinkiest, most wretched youkai in all of creation --- an INU-YOUKAI!"

"Eeeewwww!" answered a piping chorus of children's voices in return.

"Yes!" shouted Kouga again. "That's right! A horrible Inu-youkai --- the most miserable monster of them all! A pathetic dog! Now --- who can tell me what a dog really is?"

"Ohhh! Ohhh! Me!" yelled a little boy. The whining, desperate edge in his voice disappeared as soon as he was apparently selected. They listened curiously in the doorway as the boy continued on in eager, practiced, sing-song monotone ---

"A dog was once a wolf! But its spirit was broken and now it's a yucky, yipping fake that begs for scraps and treats!"

Kouga's overly-enthusiastic voice bellowed out once more. "Ha! That's right, Kouki! You ARE brilliant, my son!"

Inuyasha's fangs ground together in poorly disguised anger and his hand clenched into a tight fist. "A yucky, yipping what?! Why that ---" He stormed forward with a violent gleam in his golden eyes.

Seeking to hold off this first inevitable fight for as long as she possibly could, Kagome sought to calm Inuyasha just as he was about to burst into the den. "Easy, sweetheart --- they're just children!" she interjected smoothly, glancing down and rubbing at her own belly, seeking to remind him that HE would be a father soon too.

"Just children?! Yeah! And Kouga is the biggest fucking child of them all!" the hanyou shot back moodily. With another growl, he charged into the room unannounced, setting off a collective gasp from a line of rather rambunctious and mischievous looking wolf-children.

"Temee --- Kouga ---" Inuyasha began angrily.

His planned outburst was interrupted as all of the children shot to their little feet at once, each fixing the annoyed hanyou with astonished glittering-blue eyes. "Look Touchan!" shouted the tallest boy, his thrilled tone clearly distinguishing him as the one who had recited on the 'nature' of dogs a few moments before. "You were right!"

With a near perfect imitation of his father's swagger, the boy stalked forward, glancing back to his younger siblings for support. "It IS an inu-youkai! GET HIM!"

"Heh?!" Inuyasha blinked in surprise. He backpedaled quickly, but tripped on the many toys and mismatched pelts scattered messily about the room. In the next instant, he was charged by the horde of snarling wolf cubs and dragged unceremoniously down to the floor.

Kouga clapped his hands together and smiled in unadulterated glee at the chaotic scene HE'D created. "Ohhh! That's it, Akukaze!" the wolf urged, as he watched his old 'nemesis' rolling on the ground in such an undignified position. "And, yes, Kousai --- that's daddy's girl --- BITE him harder!" There was an abrupt strangled yelp as the beleaguered hanyou continued to struggle to right himself under the wriggling weight of six, eight --- no, nine pups?!?

Kouga merely rocked backed on his heels, and happily allowed the pandemonium to continue to unfold. He smirked as one boy with distinctive striped-hair landed a rather good jab at the hanyou's gut. "Oh - that WAS a good punch. Hey --- wait a minute ---" The wolf-prince suddenly waded into the brawl to drag the freckled-faced child from the "battle". He pulled the snarling cub up to eye level by the scruff of the neck and quirked his head from side to side, staring intently into his face.

"Wait --- you're not mine --- are ya!?" Kouga asked brusquely, as he flipped the giggling child upside down. "Of course not!" the boy answered matter-of-factly. "My father is Ginta!"

"Ahhh! Oh yeah!" Kouga smiled, momentarily satisfied with his answer. The wolf's jaw dropped open as a new thought suddenly occurred to him. "Wait, BRAT! Then what the hell are you doing here at this hour!? I'M not feeding everyone, you know!" he shouted with an indignant stomp of his foot.

The child shrugged and then fought his way free, seeking to rejoin the rollicking pile on the floor.

At that very moment, Ayame returned, entering the room with Ginta and Hakkaku still following closely at her heels. The wolf princess' pale complexion flushed bright pink with embarrassment as she gasped in alarm at the frenzied state of her young and the disastrous condition of her den. It appeared that her children were currently engaged in another furious tussle and --- and at the bottom of the pile she caught the distinctive flash of red and white. Inuyasha?

"Hey --- what's going on in here?! Kouga, this is no way to treat our company!" Ayame cried, thrusting her infant into the arms of a bemused Miroku. She pushed past her still rather stunned (or, in Miroku and Shippou's cases, rather delighted) visitors and raced towards the children, dragging them back two at a time. "Choukyosei --- let go of his ear! Right now, young man, I MEAN it!"

Several grumbling whines (and a few light swats) later, she had forced them to release the sweating hanyou, and Inuyasha was finally able to roll back to his feet with a weary gasp. "Kouga! Real mature," he panted, readjusting his rumpled haori. "Siccing a bunch of ankle-biters on me because you're still too much of a coward to take me on yourself?! You fucking son of a bitch!"

The wolf merely smiled with feigned innocence, and picked up one tiny and thoughtful-looking girl --- the only child to have stayed at his side and out of the impromptu brawl. "Watch your language in front of my little ones, Inukkoro!"

"Little ones! I don't see any little ones! Just wicked little MONSTERS!" Inuyasha bellowed, glancing down at the row of suddenly way-too-innocent looking children that were staring back at him far too sweetly. At his petulant, angry words their toothy smiles faded, replaced by deep frowns and a chorus of hisses and diminutive growls. Inuyasha turned back to his companions and rolled his eyes. "Can you believe this crap?"

Kouga barked out a quick, sarcastic laugh. "Did you just call my precious little treasures 'monsters' --- why you ---" The wolf demon set his small daughter down, and gave the child a fond pat on her head, before marching forward to shove at the hanyou's chest confrontationally. Not willing to take ANY more abuse, Inuyasha shoved Kouga back and, within seconds, both demons were nose to nose and snarling ferociously in each other's faces.

"Ummm --- excuse me ---" Kagome interrupted, stepping daintily over a broken earthenware bowl and up to their sides. Kouga's throaty growl was cut off immediately as he finally directed his full attention to the miko.

"Kagome! Look at you!" he shouted excitedly, pointing at her belly. He clasped her hand in both of his, and turned her around to examine her at every angle till she blushed modestly. "I can't believe you came all this way! And I can't believe you let that bastard knock you up!" He let out a short, wistful sigh. "Your soft heart is still getting you into trouble, huh?! I know you only sleep with him out of pity! I just can't believe he would be so selfish as to drag you up here!"

Inuyasha stared at their interlaced fingers. Though he logically knew Kouga's action was meant to be a friendly, NOT flirtatious, gesture, enough was enough! Within seconds, his fangs were bared, and he had the wolf demon trapped in a powerful headlock.

Practical as ever, Sango patiently herded the wide-eyed children back a few paces as both Ayame and Kagome shrieked simultaneous warnings. Dashing forward, the wolf princess joined the scuffle, hands shooting out to catch her swearing husband by his pointy ear and to fist in his long ponytail. In much the same manner she had used on her rowdy little ones, she dragged Kouga back, shoving him towards Ginta and Hakkaku roughly. Meanwhile, Miroku and Shippou raced in to forcibly pull the kicking and clawing Inuyasha to the other end of the room.

"Now who's being MATURE, Inukkoro?!" the wolf prince jeered, as Ginta and Hakkaku pinned him to the wall by his shoulders.

"Stop this at once!" Ayame screeched in her husband's infuriated face. "Behave yourself, Kouga --- if you CAN! We need help! HIS help! Why are we all here in the North to begin with? Don't you remember what Naraku did to our home the last time he tried to take those wretched, worthless jewel shards!? We need to destroy that evil creature before he comes back! Before he comes to kill you!"

Kouga snorted and struggled to escape his friends' tight grip. "Naraku can't kill me, woman! That pathetic bastard --- I'm going to destroy him! Him --- and that bitch who murdered my kin so long ago! I almost had her last time ---"

Ayame winced in sympathy at her mate's anguish. She nodded her head solemnly, permitting Ginta and Hakkaku release him. "I'm sorry --- it's just," she whispered, "I don't want to lose you."

"Hmphhh."

Though the wolf-prince appeared to scoff at her simple, heart-felt words, his shoulders slumped noticeably and his aggressive stance vanished. With a dramatic sigh, he settled himself on a warm pile of skins in the corner and gestured for his guests to follow suit.

Still protesting under his breath, Inuyasha sunk cross-legged to the rough stone floor, as Kagome knelt primly beside him.

Ayame brightened at this sudden cooperative behavior. She needed to act quickly to get some sort of dialogue flowing between her pouting husband and the hanyou again.

"Alright --- Let's start over ---" she began breathlessly, ignoring the fact that Kouga had crossed his arms with a huff and was scowling belligerently into the far wall. "You'll have to forgive the little ones! We have so few guests!" She giggled nervously, pausing to nudge some old bones under a bulky fur with her toe. The demoness ushered her groaning children together to form a straggly line.

"Come on, all of you --- stand up straight --- and let everyone get a look at you!" To everyone's great confusion, she attempted to make quick work of properly introducing her many children.

"The handsome one here is Kouki," she said, patting the boy on the cheek. "Isn't he just the spitting image Kouga? And the sweetest thing ever!" As soon as his mother moved to the next child, the boy bared his small fangs and stuck his tongue out at Inuyasha. The hanyou's hand strayed all too quickly to Tetsusaiga's hilt, earning him a reproachful smack from Kagome.

Ayame continued, oblivious to the exchange. "And then right next to him, as usual, is Choukyosei! He's our smart one! As clever as his daddy!" Sango pinched Miroku's arm as the monk struggled valiantly to keep from giggling aloud ---

"And then our first set of twins, Koba and Akukaze, they're --- wait, some of these aren't mine!" She tapped a clawed finger against her lip as she studied the remaining children. "Anyone whose daddy isn't Kouga, take three steps forward --- NOW!" she ordered. Four giggling wolf cubs raced out of the line to dart behind the legs of the devilishly grinning Ginta and Hakkaku.

"Right," Ayame moved on, flipping her red hair back over her shoulder. "Now this is my second set of twins, Mieika and Kousai! My lovely girls! Such dainty little blossoms!"

Kagome smiled at the pair. Though identical in appearance, she swore she'd never seen a more contrasting duo. One little girl was rumpled and rough and tumble, her aggressive growls and insolent glare making her nearly indistinguishable from her older brothers. Her twin, meanwhile, somehow seemed far more composed and calm. The girl's keen, solemn, emerald eyes were currently fixed upon "the strangers" with a shy, friendly curiosity.

Ayame's excited voice caught Kagome's attention again. "And, of course, there's the baby! Kouga hasn't named him yet!" the demoness concluded brightly, finally offering to take her sleeping infant back from Miroku. For her children's sake, she hastily waved her hand over her guests once more.

"Everyone, these are --- Kouki, quit hitting your brother! These are friends of Touchan's --- mostly. This is Kagome, a powerful miko! She helped me jog your father's memory and win his heart! And here's Sango --- she's a 'taijiya' --- that means 'demon-killer'! So I want you all to remember her armor! Never, NEVER EVER wander too close to humans who dress like this! A-ha, sorry Sango!" She laughed airily.

"Whatever," Sango answered in an icy tone as she tightened her grip on Hiraikotsu, not really appreciating being vilified and used as a lesson. She couldn't help but feel slightly wounded as the children's angry, accusing eyes now came to rest squarely on HER instead of Inuyasha.

"And this is Miroku. He's a monk, and he's been cursed with a Kazaana! So nobody touch his right hand --- I don't care how pretty you think those beads are --- and that means you, Mieika!!! And Shippou here is much like us! He's a kitsune! And, well, I guess you've all met Inuyasha." As soon as the hanyou's name was mentioned, there was another round of hissing and growling.

"Little brats," Inuyasha mumbled angrily under his breath.

"Yeah, they look like quite a handful," Sango whispered in agreement, coming to stand behind him, her eyes wide as she peered down at all the wolf cubs. She quickly glanced back at her husband. This had been his DREAM after all! Sure enough, Miroku's face had taken on the same goofy look he used to sport when surrounded by a group of rather attractive young women in need of rescuing. Even though she was still a bit offended by Ayame's flippant comment on her profession, Sango's expression softened; after all, she hadn't seen Miroku smile in days.

Her dry amusement was short lived however. The taijiya soon noticed that her husband's eyes had moved from the children to his own cursed hand. Once again, all the worries and doubts she thought she had cast aside at their departure flooded back full force. Gods --- if anything were to befall him now, what would she do?

In talks with Mushin, she had learned that little Kaisei was the only daughter born to his family in many, many generations, even before his grandfather first received the Kazaana. Would Naraku's curse affect his whole line or did the wind tunnel appear solely on the males? She remembered how Miroku had once sought to father as many children as he could, in hopes of creating an heir to avenge his death and resume his quest if he should fall. But from the moment Kaisei was born, it seemed he no longer cared about heirs or his family honor, and he never asked her to bare him another child. He seemed determined that his slow torture should never pass to his own flesh and blood again.

Sango's breath caught at the look of guilt and pain that flashed across his usually cheerful face. With a forced smile, she reached out and grasped Miroku's hand, offering it a gentle squeeze. The priest looked up in surprise, violet eyes searching her face. "We'll end this soon," she whispered quietly, turning back to face the wolf-children. "I promise you."

Inuyasha interrupted with a snarl, focusing on Kouga, who was still sulking in the corner. "Fine, fine! Introductions are over!" he gritted impatiently. "Now hurry up and tell us what you know about Naraku, so I can get the hell out of here and wash this wolf stink off of me!"

"Wanna leave, wan-chan?" The wolf-prince dug through the children's toys scattered across the floor at his feet, and picked up a small pink ball. "Here, I'll make it easy for you!" He hurled the ball at the half-demon's head. "There, puppy --- GO FETCH!!!"

As the tension in the cave began to rise again, the bright-looking little girl that had held back during the first fray now approached the strangers bravely, ignoring the shouting that drowned out Inuyasha's next rude words. She wrung a tattered, obviously well-loved rag doll between her tiny clawed fingers and stared up at Shippou bashfully.

"Hello," she whispered.

The fox looked down in surprise. "Hi," he mumbled back, quickly returning his attention to the others, preparing to jump in at a moment's notice whenever it came to blows.

"Mama said your name's Shippou," the child stated quietly.

"Yeah," he confirmed absently, more interested in the impending fight, and the possibility of learning a few new colorful curses, than listening to the little girl.

The child took another step closer. "I'm Mieika," she continued in a bolder tone, undeterred and completely oblivious to the lack of enthusiasm in the fox's voice. "I'm four years old. I like butterflies and my dolls and rainbows and taking long naps and counting stars and when Touchan takes me racing very, very, very fast and when I grow up I'm going to marry you --- okay?"

Shippou's chin dropped as he stared down and tried to absorb all of the child's frenetic words. "Ummmm, sure, whatever ---" he stammered, shifting uncomfortably.

Pausing in mid-insult, Kouga turned from Inuyasha and looked up at the fox in shock and sympathetic horror. "Nooooooooooooo!" he shouted, leaping up to his feet and racing to the extremely flustered kitsune's side. "Don't promise her THAT! These wolf girls NEVER forget a vow like that! Believe me, I know! Damnit --- just look at what the hell happened to me!"

From where she was seated, reclining comfortably on a large white pelt, Ayame blinked in shock. "Oh, shut up Kouga!" she shouted, her lovely face going from scarlet to purple in her rage. "We all KNOW you weren't too happy when Grandfather 'requested' that you fulfill your pledge and become my mate, but it WAS for your own good ---" She looked desperately at Kagome and Sango, as if expecting automatic female support.

"For my own good? And requested? REQUESTED!? Woman --- they all tricked me --- those countless brainless, hairy brutes that you call brothers --- and --- and those two traitors over there!" Kouga yelled, whirling around to point an accusing finger at Ginta and Hakkaku as the pair laughed nervously and stumbled back a few paces. "You guys knocked me out and tied me up! You dragged me up here! And when I came to days later, it was all over!"

Ayame stuck her small nose in the air and turned away in a huff. "Well, Kouga, a promise IS a promise, and you were being unreasonable. You were trying to dodge your responsibility to your OWN people!" she countered practically, as she moved to stand between her husband and his two trembling lieutenants. "And besides, you LOVE me now and you KNOW it!" As soon as she uttered those words, Ayame was surrounded by her numerous children and together they all fixed Kouga with practiced pleading and wounded expressions.

"Arghhh! Not those eyes! Don't look at Daddy like that!!!" The wolf rubbed at his temples in exasperation, but anyone could easily see the warmth in his expression as he glanced both at his mate and the many little ones staring most desperately and hopefully back at him. "Well, I have to say it WAS a pretty good trick," he sighed, as he scratched his chin sheepishly. "Never saw it coming."

He cleared his throat, and glanced at Inuyasha again, offering a small nod of truce. "That's ENOUGH! Okay, anyone shorter than an icky toad demon has to go to bed right now! Otou-sama needs to talk to the nice doggie!" He clapped his hands to emphasize his seriousness and the children filed passed, groaning in their disappointment.

Ginta and Hakkaku quickly ushered their own cubs out as well, rather relieved that their leader appeared ready to be accommodating and reasonable.

"FINALLY!" Inuyasha shouted tersely after the whines died down, and each and every reluctant child had left the room. "I didn't come all the way up here for this! Enough wasted time, yase ookami. So, what's all this crap about Naraku? You found his scent or what?"

Kouga nodded again, and pulled Ayame into his lap, seeking to appease her after his last tirade. "Sort of --- not Naraku's scent," he corrected. "It's hard to explain. I think Kagome would understand better than you ever could. It's not a smell --- it's like a pull."

Kagome grabbed a fistful of Inuyasha's red haori. "A pull?" she echoed, her eyes lighting with interest.

"Yeah. Coming from the jewel shards in my legs, you know?"

"The jewel shards?" she asked, excitement starting to creep into her voice. "Does this pull --- does it feel like there's somewhere else you need to be?"

Kouga nodded vigorously. "YES! Way in the east, there's this strange ravine and --- and every time I travel too close to it, it's like --- like something's calling me. And it's not a good feeling at all. In fact, it makes my skin crawl just thinking about it." He scratched at his forearm furiously.

Kagome drew in a deep breath as everyone stared at her in expectation. "Yes," she whispered, biting her fingernails nervously. "That's kind of what I feel when I come close to a shard. Not exactly, but --- hmmmm." The miko exchanged a quick, knowing glance with Inuyasha, noting how tightly the hanyou's fist was clenched around the hilt of Tetsusaiga again. "Kouga-kun! Will you take us to the place? Onegai?"

"Wait!" Ayame shouted, shrugging free of Kouga's grasp and rising to her feet. "Before you all go racing off, these two have something to report." She nodded towards Ginta and Hakkaku.

The pair stepped forward slowly, steeling themselves for delivering what appeared to be bad news. "Yeah, well, when our wolves were out patrolling, they accidentally let someone cross through our lands --- someone they possibly shouldn't have ---"

"WHAT?!" Kouga thundered back in shock.

"It's not their fault though, Kouga! They didn't know --- they just knew we were expecting visitors and --- got a bit confused," Hakkaku hurried to explain.

"Take it easy," Ayame whispered encouragingly to him, placing her hand on his armored shoulder. "Just tell him ---"

Both the hanyou and the wolf-prince leaned forward impatiently, as the fretful demons continued to stare down at their feet in disgrace.

"Well, who the hell was it?" Kouga roared, after several minutes of stuttering had passed.

"Ummm --- it looked like that boy --- the boy who serves Naraku."

"The boy who serves Naraku?" Sango shouted in reflexive panic. Before Miroku could stop her, she had raced forward to seize Ginta roughly. "What boy?" she seethed.

The wolf fixed her with a bewildered look. "No, no! Not who you're thinking of right now! It was a youkai boy --- well, we think ---"

"Hakudoushi?" Inuyasha snapped. "Was that who you saw? What the hell? Why didn't you two say something earlier?!"

"Well, the demon was gone before anyone could really get a clear look! And besides we're not stupid!" Hakkaku answered defensively. "We've been putting up with you and Kouga for years now! We know how the two of you get! I didn't want to drop this on everyone from the beginning, before you guys had a chance to get your first brawl out of the way!

"And besides," Ginta chimed in, "We're not sure it REALLY was him to begin with! But whatever it was --- it wasn't causing trouble here! It was heading south!"

Sango paced in agitation. This latest news was doing nothing to settle her already frazzled nerves. "Wait --- it was heading south?! Let me get this straight, you saw a demon that might have been Hakudoushi, and he was heading SOUTH!?" Without another word, she hefted Hiraikotsu and stormed towards the door.

"What?! Where are you going, Sango?" Miroku yelled worriedly, chasing at her heels.

"I have to go back!" she cried. "Kohaku still hasn't joined us --- what if he ran into that --- that thing --- on his way up here?"

Inuyasha raced to Miroku's side, helping the priest block her path. "Sango, you've got to be fucking kidding!" the hanyou scolded. "I need you with ME! If this dumb ass is right and Naraku is at the bottom of some filthy hole --- it's gonna take ALL of us! Kohaku's not stupid --- he'll be here any day! He wants his revenge as much as the rest of us!"

Sango rubbed at her temples. But --- but Kohaku was acting so damn strange when she left! She spun around quickly to hide her frightened, puzzled expression from her husband and the half-demon. Maybe she should tell everyone some of the bizarre things she thought she heard her brother say the morning they departed for the North? The taijiya swallowed hard, and decided it was best not to distract the others any further. "Gomen," she whispered, "I'm just being overbearing and overprotective, I guess. As usual, huh?"

Shippou stepped forward and lightly grasped her arm. "Sango, relax. If it will make you feel better, I'll go back and see if I meet up with Kohaku."

"Really?" The demon exterminator smiled in relief and lifted her grateful eyes to the fox's.

Inuyasha growled in renewed annoyance. "Oi --- Didn't you hear what I just said!?! If this flea covered wolf is right about Naraku, I'm GONNA need EVERYONE and that includes YOU, you scrawny, sneaky brat!"

Shippou rolled his eyes. "Awwww --- you confidence and love for me is overwhelming! I know deep thought hurts you, but just try to remember about my powers and quit barking in my face! I'm not a kid anymore! I can be there and back in just a few days if I fly! We only traveled up here so slowly because of ---" he cleared his throat and pointed delicately at Kagome's belly, hoping he wasn't offending his surrogate mother.

Inuyasha's mouth clamped shut with a snap, suddenly remembering Kagome should be resting now. "Whatever, fine. Go check on Kohaku and get him to hurry his ass up here. If these morons are right and you do pick up the scent of Hakudoushi --- pay close attention to where it is so we can pick up his trail and chase him down if Kouga is wrong about this 'place'! He's taking us out there --- at sunrise. Aren't ya, yase ookami?"

Kouga grinned in anticipation, inspecting his long claws. "Only if you're fast enough to keep up with me, Inukkoro."

Kohaku awoke drenched in sweat, and winced in pain as another strange tingle snaked its way along his spine. He reached back to gingerly massage his shoulder blade, cursing as the awful sensation immediately flared again. His very skin seemed to be ablaze, his nerves firing in an excruciating burn that seemed uncannily familiar.

Enough was enough! This had been going on for far too many days now and he could no longer pretend to ignore it. The young man shifted in his bed and glanced around the darkened hut. His brown eyes fell upon his niece as she slumbered peacefully in her sleeping-basket a few feet away.

Another wave of pain hit him, this one more terrible and urgent than ever before, and his whole body shook with the effort it took to keep from crying out.

Stupid fool, he gritted in his mind, finally feeling the first stirrings of real panic. You should have listened to Sango from the start. Whatever the case --- it's time to seek Kaede out.

NOW.

With shaking fingers, Kohaku coiled his weapon around his shoulders, tucking the sickle blade carefully into his sash. He hurriedly moved to bundle Kaisei in warmer blankets, trying his best not to wake her. Heading out into the cold night air, he turned slowly, dimly trying to focus on the direction of the priestess' hut. The pain flared again and he stumbled in the dark, reaching out to support his weight on a moss-covered tree. The young man leaned back to rest --- only for a moment, he whispered to himself --- and stared absently up at the night sky.

He let his eyes drift peacefully closed ---

And snapped them open just as quickly to concentrate more intently on the sky again. Somehow, in some way --- it --- it just didn't seem right! The clouds were so damn low and they seemed fixed in place, even though the wind whistled harshly all about him. And --- they --- they seemed to be strangely murky and dark even though he could clearly see that the moon was shining brightly. Wait, were those even clouds at all? What the hell?! Kohaku blinked rapidly, hoping to clear his vision. He MUST be sicker than the others even thought!

With a pained grunt, Kohaku forced himself to run, tightening his grip protectively around the child in his arms. Several exhausting moments later, he came to an abrupt halt and looked around in sheer panic. Now what?! He was currently deep in Inuyasha's forest, a good mile from the village at least. How --- how could he have come this way? How could he have traveled so far in the wrong direction without being aware of it?

The demon slayer glanced up into the dark, leafless trees, pausing to catch his ragged breath once more. Strange, he mused, for some reason he felt a little better out here in the woods. He stumbled a few more paces, now seeking to re-trace his steps. A large twisting shadow filled his immediate path, and he was surprised to find himself staring up in fascination at the eerie, empty boughs of the Goshinboko as they danced in the wind.

The Goshinboko, he thought with a cruel smile. How beautiful. The place where the carcass of that fool Inuyasha should have remained, rotting away over the centuries. I wonder if his blood still stains its smooth bark ---

With a startled cry, Kohaku collapsed to his knees and pressed his fingers to his fevered forehead. Gods, he was losing his mind. Once again, it felt like his thoughts were being twisted and manipulated by someone else. He needed return to the village NOW, he needed to bring Kaisei to Kaede-sama, he needed to take whatever disgusting medicine she shoved down his throat and hope to get some rest ---

The young man struggled up from the cold ground, the small, routine movements seeming to require all his energy and concentration. "Shhhhh --- it's okay," he murmured as calmingly as he could when Kaisei whimpered and shifted fitfully in his arms.

He glanced about in astonishment. Over these past few moments, it seemed that the clouds had descended lower to swirl all about him, and the misty purple shadows played havoc with his senses as they caressed his fevered skin. His head jerked up as one peculiar shadow seemed to solidify and move to steadily approach him. His fist instinctively tightened about his weapon.

"Who?" Kohaku choked in a hoarse whisper. "Who's there?"

A small child in white stepped out from the inky shadows cast by the Goshinboku. "Who's there?" he echoed in a pleasant, all-too-familiar voice. "Me, of course! And just look what I've found! A pair of silly little fishies --- lost and alone! Just like Naraku said I would!"

"You!" Kohaku spat, glowering down upon the grinning form of Hakudoushi. "Get the hell out of here!" In his outrage and fear for his young niece's life, he somehow mustered the strength to assume a defensive posture. He spun his weapon in an easy circle, daring the demon to come within its range.

"There, there!" the wicked youkai crooned far too sweetly. "Is that any way to greet a comrade after being parted for soon long?"

"You loathsome little --- what the hell do you want?" Kohaku grated, taking several measured steps back as his enemy advanced threateningly. A battle seemed imminent, and he looked wildly around the glade for a place to shelter Kaisei.

"Oh, it's not what I want --- it's what WE want!" Hakudoushi continued conversationally as he ran a pale finger along the edge of his pike. "Our master desires your company again." The demon resumed stalking towards his prey until the young man stumbled over a root of the Goshinboko with a startled gasp.

He had no other choice. Kohaku laid Kaisei down in a boll of the great tree, and wrapped her blankets tighter about her frame with a regretful smile. He straightened and turned away, staring levelly into the cold eyes of his ruthless opponent. Wincing in great pain, he raced to attack the demon, hoping to end this quickly before he passed out from the agony. He released his sickle in a deadly arc to rake the spot where Hakudoushi had just stood mere moments before.

The laughing youkai re-materialized a second later, hovering languidly in the air just to his left.

"Listen here, you little worm," Kohaku screamed in defiance. "Naraku's not my master --- not anymore!" He prepared to strike the smug grin off that creature's face with his blade.

"Oh really?" the youkai countered with a self-satisfied chuckle as he quickly dodged that second, well-aimed blow. "If Naraku isn't your master --- then perhaps this is?"

Hakudoushi held up his delicate hand and Kohaku found himself breaking out in an instant cold sweat. He couldn't help but notice that a glowing black light had begun to seep through the creases between the demon's tightly clamped fingers.

"What the hell? What have you got there?" Kohaku's eyes widened in horror and he backed up quickly. He gasped in sudden understanding as Hakudoushi's malicious smile broadened. "No --- that can't be!?"

With a derisive snicker, the demon opened his fist, freeing the tiny jewel shard he carried. Powered by his dark jyaki, it hurtled through the night air, seeking to return to Kohaku's flesh. The boy spun quickly, racing back towards Kaisei, his thoughts focused solely on shielding his defenseless niece and escaping with her back to the village. As he turned, he felt a burning pain in his shoulder and knew impulsively that it was too late. With a strangled scream he fell to the ground. He struggled on his hands and knees to crawl the reminder of the distance to the child as a terrible blackness began to wash over him. Several long minutes later, he reached her side, his breath labored, his vision blurring. The toddler yawned, and opened her eyes with a start. With a look a terror, she stared past her uncle and tried to take in her unfamiliar, nightmarish surroundings.

She's such a pretty child, Kohaku mused, as he stared down at the little girl, wishing he knew some way to ease her fears. If only I could remember her name --- didn't it have something to do with the sea?

His eyelids rolled white and the young man collapsed again.

Hakudoushi sauntered over to his fallen adversary, a scowl of extreme dissatisfaction twisting his falsely angelic little features. "Tooooo EASY! So damn disappointing," he sighed, moving closer to inspect the seemingly unconscious boy.

There was a flash of cold iron and bone, and Hakudoushi leapt back, a choked gurgle issuing from his throat. His little hands came up to claw wildly at his neck, and he was shocked by the feeling of a hot surge of something wet and slippery. He pulled his fingers up to his astonished eyes for inspection and stared down in disbelief as he found them stained black with his own burning blood. He reached up again, surprised to find Kohaku's curved sickle blade protruding from his slender neck. That --- that little bastard! Still stunned, the youkai looked up at the demon hunter, his pale eyes narrowing in his wrath and pain.

"How --- how can you still be standing? How can you remember?!" he hissed, his voice little more than a strangled wheeze.

Kohaku didn't answer, but grinned haughtily, his dark gaze meeting that of his staggered foe with an expression of equal fury. "Disappointing, huh?" he mocked, still focusing all of his thoughts on fighting the shard's control. "Looks like you've all underestimated me once again!'

With a snarl, Hakudoushi pulled the weapon from his flesh, muttering bitter curses as his wound sought to heal itself. "Why you filthy little ningen --- you'll --- I'll make you regret that!" The youkai whirled in a neat circle, bringing his pike around. He swept under the slackened iron chain, fully prepared to cleave the insolent young human in half ---

As Kohaku moved to defend himself, he felt the jewel shard pulse again, and his body became immobile --- held frozen by some invisible force. He stared defiantly into his enemy's face, calmly awaiting the killing blow. But the lethal strike of Hakudoushi's spear was stopped as a smooth hand caught the gleaming blade ---

Sorry EVIL cliff-hanger again! Who could it be!?

Thanks to everyone who reviewed! Sorry I didn't get to answer everyone! Trying to get the next Chapter up in the next few days!

Essie – YEP, hold on to that baseball bat and crawl under the covers! The 'baddies' are back! Thanks so much for that hysterical review! It still cracks me up!

Ha, ha --- Melinda-chan! That was great! I know, I know! I'm getting back to the good stuff (I hope!) and sorry about the Sess/Rin mush! I had a hard time writing that last chapter, believe me!

Choco-choco – laughs even harder! Ohhhh – that's a disturbing mental image!

Jade Summers – Hi! Good news is that now I have some time on my hands and next chapter will be out in a few days! Really glad you like the story!

RabidAnimeGurl – Yep, and I'm afraid Naraku's up to a whole lot worse! I can promise you! Rin and Sess won't get much of a 'honeymoon'!

Not too much vocab!

Cattico – Thanks! I always wanted to give poor Sess a past! Think he'd have to deal with some heavy issues to become the character we all know and love!


	21. Chapter 20

**PLEASE READ:**

Due to the massive amount of stories that have been disappearing daily, I can't imagine Eien Ni is going to survive here for very much longer. I've tried not to include anything that you couldn't see or would be discussed in an R rated film, but it's so subjective --- who knows! Anyway, in case this **IS** goodbye, I've also posted the story on a few more sites --- JUST TAKE OUT THE SPACES: mediaminer. org, the Killing Perfection (even though the format looks terrible!), soupfiction. net, Inuyasha. net, Christy's very cool website: snowy. web1000. com/ index.htm and the site, Inuyasha Fanfiction: Guilty Pleasures: www. kokololio. com/ guiltypleasures/ iy.html --- This sucks because it's been so nice to 'meet' all of you, and I've really loved all the feedback and kind reviews. But, who knows, maybe I'm just over- reacting and things will be fine!  
  
**Spoiler Rant:** Ohhhh --- say it ain't so! Not Hakudoushi! Not wonderful, wicked, depraved, perfectly deliciously evil little Hakudoushi sucked into the Kazaana! Why? I wasn't ready! Ah, isn't fan-fiction fun --- when the real series kills off favored characters. (la, la, la ---- shoves fingers in ears, 'I'm not listening!') Well, **evil = death** in anime and the end is coming soon! But I'm okay --- just as long as Sess makes it! And Kagura too, wow! She's been kicking some Sengoku Jidai heinee lately!  
  
SORRY FOR THE TYPOS – I changed a few things after proof-reading. **THANK YOU NOTOES & JANE. AND THANK YOU RESMIRINDA!**

**

* * *

**  
**Chapter 20: Fukai Fuyu**

* * *

The two stunned fighters glanced upwards, each glaring into the darkness to identify this newest threat. Simultaneously, their astonished faces fell upon a tall, shadowy figure draped in white fur --- a figure draped in white fur, with waist length waves of ebony hair, and a pair of soul-less red eyes staring out eerily from behind a baboon skull mask.  
  
"Naraku!" Kohaku's complexion drained of all color, and he resumed his struggling in earnest, fighting in vain to free himself from his invisible bonds. "Naraku!" Hakudoushi's voice echoed a second later as he too recognized the interloper, and his look of alarm faded from his pale features to be replaced by a smug grin. His expression seemed overflowing with savage devotion and pride as he stared adoringly at his master.  
  
"Irasshai! Welcome, my lord!" he whispered excitedly.  
  
Naraku did not reply, but merely turned back to his servant with a bland look. Hakudoushi squinted up inquiringly, reveling in the feeling of all that dark power coursing wildly around him. _Wait_ --- the power --- _it just didn't seem right_! This being felt too damn weak to be the real Naraku! Which could only mean ---  
  
After a quick moment of deliberation, the demon boy shrugged his shoulders indifferently. "Fine, maybe not Naraku," he pouted in obvious disappoint. "Kugutsu --- eh??"  
  
Hakudoushi's fawning was taken down a noticeable notch the very instant it became apparent he was addressing a mere puppet. Feeling no need to waste his flattery on a meager imitation, he returned to concentrating the bulk of his emotion towards Kohaku, still held fast and trapped in place by the kugutsu's jyaki. Focusing an evil glare on the demon-slayer, Hakudoushi spit out a wave of foul curses, still rather incensed that the insignificant little roach had actually managed to draw **HIS** blood!  
  
With an irritable, impatient snarl, he wrenched his pike free of the kugutsu's light grasp. "Damn,'Naraku'! That brainless little fool nearly killed us --- nearly killed me!" he shrieked petulantly at the demon- puppet. "The Jewel shard you gave us is NOT working! Just look at him! That brat is fighting its influence --- even as we speak! What's going on?" he demanded, stabbing the blade of his spear into the earth, all the while wishing in frustration that it could be something else. _Something that would scream ---  
  
_"Calm yourself," Naraku answered icily. "After all, 'we' anticipated this. This child is fighting our control. His mind and body are healed. He is no longer a scared little boy hiding from his memories. After all, Kohaku has been reunited with his family for a little while. He has secrets to hide. There are people he loves --- and he longs very much to protect them."  
  
Upon hearing these cold, calculating words, the nearly exhausted Kohaku blinked in shock and outrage. _Secrets to hide? Oh gods --- there were so many!_ Naraku had been --- Naraku had been planning this from the beginning! He suddenly found the strength to jerk his arm free from the demon's icy, invisible grip. Shaking his head wildly to clear his mind, he grappled over his shoulder to claw violently at his back, crying out in dismay when he realized the corrupted shard was too far out of his reach. Naraku tapped his long claws together and smiled at him pleasantly, as if patiently waiting for him to realize his escape attempts were futile. "Fuck you!" Kohaku bellowed in outrage, abandoning his efforts to withdraw the shard to reach instead for a shiriken concealed within his sash. But before he could complete the action and grab hold of the hidden weapon, another powerful flare of jyaki exploded around him. The young man collapsed to the cold forest floor again, his body wracked with deep shudders.  
  
Naraku sighed in boredom and continued to converse blandly with Hakudoushi as if Kohaku hadn't even spoken or tried to resist him in any way. "Yes --- he's fighting. But not for much longer. This should do the trick." The demon puppet held up his hand to reveal a second shard of the Shikon no Tama.  
  
Hakudoushi smiled in gleeful understanding. "Mou hitotsu no kakera! Another shard, huh?" With a trilling laugh, he raced forward to deliver a well- placed kick to the demon-slayer's ribs and stepped down on the boy's throat, pinning him to the ground. "What if that one doesn't work either, Master? Then do I get to kill Kohaku?" Another piercing wail assailed his sensitive ears and his shoulders hunched in revulsion. He whirled sharply, turning to regard the little girl --- the child his enemy had been trying so desperately to protect. She was still sobbing in terror as she lay huddled at the base of the old tree. He released the gasping Kohaku and marched over to her with obvious deadly intent. "And what about this yowling human brat? Can I kill it too?" he asked, nudging her shaking form with his bare foot.  
  
The kugutsu laughed, and fixed the wailing Kaisei with a look of pure hate. "If Kohaku remains defiant after we give him this, kill him --- yes, by all means! But leave that infant alive --- noisy and pathetic as it might be! After all, when I kill her father --- that troublesome priest --- I want his last tortured thought to be about his curse passing on to her!" The foul creature stepped forward, reaching out to cuddle the screaming toddler in his arms. With a cruel sneer, he tore a ragged section from the white baboon hide to drape over her shivering body for additional warmth.  
  
As if she instinctively recognized his evil, Kaisei struggled to escape the demon's grip, her chubby arms flailing to smack at his pale face and rip at his white pelt. Naraku touched a long clawed finger to the terrified child's forehead and she fell silent at once, her eyelids fluttering closed as she slipped into unconsciousness. "When we're finished here," the kugutsu murmured maliciously. "We'll return this snot-nosed beast to the village --- alive ---" He raked his fingers through Kaisei's glossy black hair and then placed her limp form back among the knarled roots of the Goshinboku. "But for now, give this to the Kohaku --- at once!"  
  
Kohaku's momentary relief in knowing that his niece would be left alive and unharmed was short-lived as he now contemplated to his own twisted fate. _He thought the nightmare was over! Sango, Miroku, his friends --- what would become of them!_ His brown eyes widened in pain, and he could do nothing but stare in numb terror as Hakudoushi approached with that second corrupted shard. In his great fear, he couldn't even savor the satisfaction in noticing that the little demon's movements were a bit more cautious and not quite so over-confident this time --- and then ---  
  
Something blindingly hot was pressed into his chest.  
  
"Aneue --- I'm so sorry!" Kohaku murmured as his mind emptied, his vision held by that malevolent smirk as Hakudoushi bent over him ---  
  
And then everything was gone.

* * *

The two youkai watched in rapt fascination as the light in the boy's eyes seemed to fade, replaced by a dull hazy sheen ---  
  
"Now," Naraku leered, sauntering forward to lean casually on the weather- beaten abandoned well in the center of the clearing. "Tell me, Kohaku --- I must know! Where does that wretched half-breed disappear to on the night of the New Moon?" he inquired amiably. "Why can't I find Inuyasha when he is vulnerable --- when he is fully human?"  
  
Kohaku blinked, fighting to bring the spinning world back into focus. _Fuck - it felt like he had been asleep for ages and it was hard to concentrate on anything past the frightful ringing in his ears! _His eyes widened as if he only just realized he had an audience. _Damn - what was the question? And why did he not want to answer?_ _No, wait, he was SUPPOSED to answer --- this was **his** Master --- it was alright!  
_  
"Oh - Inuyasha --- he and Kagome, they go to the bottom of that well you're leaning on," he muttered thickly, swaying unsteadily to his feet. "They go down there and into a world with super fast carriages that have invisible horses! Where people trapped in little boxes tell you whether the sun is going to shine or not, and where there's enchanted food that comes in these tiny squishy bowls and when you pour water ---"  
  
Hakudoushi shook his head in wonder and threw his master a most derisive look. "I knew it," he scoffed with a soft chuckle. "You've damaged his already feeble human mind, Naraku."  
  
The kugutsu shook his head impatiently. "Nonsense --- we've seen these humans use more than one shard --- just like any youkai. Not too worry." His smile became increasingly evil and a red light sparked in his cold eyes. "Perhaps this Naraku merely needs to ask another question --- a question that is bound to spark our young man's fancy."  
  
The creature paced forward to lean over the seemingly raving young man, the moonlight casting eerie shadows on his already ghostly form. He clasped the demon slayer's chin tightly in fingers, causing the boy's eyes to water and flutter weakly. "Kohaku," he whispered melodiously. "The girl --- **Rin** --- what can you tell this Naraku about her?"  
  
"Rin?" Kohaku murmured in a drunk and dreamy voice. "Ohhhh --- Rin is v- very beautiful. Tottemo utsukushikute." His eyes brightened as he desperately searched his oddly uncooperative mind for facts about the young woman. "She l-likes to pick flowers and --- and her favorite foods are --- watermelons --- yeah, that's all I know about that!" He waved his hands in excitement, as he suddenly recalled a bit more. "Wait --- she thinks she talks too much but I don't care --- I like her voice. Ohhh, she can sing! Did I tell you she's very pretty --- she's very kind --- she's --- so trusting --- even with demons ---" The young man's brown eyes flickered for a moment with some forgotten pain or jealousy.  
  
With a snarl of impatience, the kugutsu slapped Kohaku across the cheek, sending the already dizzy boy staggering backwards.  
  
Hakudoushi tried to hide his smile, not sure what amused him more at the moment --- Kohaku's torture or watching Naraku fume at his own minor failure. "You see, my lord? You completely obliterated his mind!" he teased, sneering down at the demon slayer. "Would you listen to this drivel?! First a magic realm hidden in the slime at the bottom of an old well and --- and now a girl who --- what did Kohaku say? A pretty, pretty, pretty girl who sings about watermelons and enjoys presenting daisy chains to vicious demons --- I told you his mind is **GONE**!"  
  
Naraku growled in annoyance and raised his hand, and a glowing object rapidly materialized to his left. Kohaku's head's snapped up, and he shielded his eyes from the sudden brightness, while Hakudoushi huffed in exasperation, wondering if Naraku was going to keep giving out piece after piece of the Shikon no Tama till there was nothing left!  
  
"Please, master, you're not going to give him another shard of the Jewel!? It was such a tiresome bother to collect them ALL the first time around!" the little demon pouted, standing on his tip-toes to try and peek at who or what had REALLY appeared behind his master.  
  
Naraku frowned at Hakudoushi, his stern, warning look an unmistakable demand for immediate silence. He then beckoned for this newest intruder to approach. With slow, deliberate steps, the wraithlike form of Kanna made its way towards them.  
  
The demoness glided past her master without a word, stopping before Kohaku. She didn't seem like she could really be living, with her eyes black and vacant and her skin as ashy as that of a corpse --- but as she continued to tread closer, she raised her mirror up to his view. The glass rippled to form that shaky, frightened image of Rin --- the vision she had captured so long ago on that day Kagura had run across the girl, alone and unprotected in the forest.  
  
"Kohaku," Naraku whispered in a mesmerizing tone, as his prisoner stared ahead blankly, transfixed by the ethereal, wavering reflection. The demon placed his cold hand on the boy's forehead almost soothingly, as Kohaku slumped down with a small, weak cry. "You're free now, Kohaku. Tell me, what ails you? Does it have something to do with this young girl?" The evil demon smiled in false sympathy and took hold of the boy's wrist, urging him to reach out and run his shaking fingers across the young woman's fading image.  
  
"Rin is --- she's gone back to HIM," Kohaku sobbed brokenly. His face twisted in rage and hate as he now focused his attention on the second likeness held fast in the mirror's depths --- the pale, watery reflection of Sesshoumaru. His hand clenched tightly and he punched his fist into the trunk of the Goshinboku, causing the bark to crack and spray in a shower of small splinters. "HE sent her away, and I was happy! But then that --- that **DEMON **--- found out! HE found out she's tied to him --- that she draws on his youki!"  
  
Naraku could not disguise the victorious gleam in his eyes, and he nodded approvingly at Kanna as the demoness offered him a respectful, knowing bow.  
  
"Very good, Kohaku. You care for this little woman, don't you?" he whispered, forcing the boy to stare at the faces in the mirror once more. "Well, isn't that perfect. For all this Naraku wishes is for YOU to find her."  
  
Kohaku gasped. _His master wanted him to find Rin? It almost --- it almost sounded too good to be true!  
_  
Naraku nodded in response to the questioning, puzzled look in the demon slayer's eyes. "I just wish to meet this sweet little creature that has obviously won your heart. Find her and bring her back to me. Can you do that? I know you want to."  
  
The image wavered and abruptly vanished into nothingness, and the boy cried out with the loss. "Yes, I can find her, Master," he answered quickly. "I'll bring her to you!"  
  
Hakudoushi sniggered at the taijiya's over-zealous response, rather impressed in spite of himself that the kugutsu had managed to pull this latest scheme off. He supposed he shouldn't really be surprised. After all, his master's greatest power was his expert ability to turn people into pawns ---  
  
"I know you'll bring her to me, Kohaku. You can keep those jewel shards," Naraku lied sweetly, ignoring the sarcastic little youkai leering at his side. "I've recently lost a valuable servant, and I could use a strong, powerful, cunning warrior like you to replace her."  
  
The demon-slayer beamed proudly, acknowledging his master's flattery with a curt nod.  
  
"Go," Naraku urged, dismissing his re-captured servant with a casual wave. "Bring your Rin to me."  
  
Kohaku gathered his weapon, fisting the long chain in his hands. He raced from the clearing and disappeared into the dark forest --- his direction unmistakably westward.  
  
The kugutsu inhaled deeply, and then turned back to Hakudoushi, whose lavender eyes were full of derision and mistrust as they tracked Kohaku's path.  
  
Naraku smiled. "Follow him," he hissed. "And keep your eyes open --- he's stronger than before. And, much like Kagura used to be --- he'll be less prone to follow orders."  
  
The little demon leapt off in pursuit, only to be halted an instant later as his master called out to him once more. "And, Hakudoushi," Naraku growled. "If Kohaku does anything stupid or noble --- kill him --- **immediately**."  
  
"Of course, Master. Whatever you wish." The youkai boy grinned. _Finally --- there will screaming agai_n, he thought as he picked up his quarry's trail, vanishing into the dark night. _Soon --- very soon --- my hands will be covered in blood again!_

* * *

Quietly humming her old traveling song, Rin glanced at Sesshoumaru as he glided ahead of them in the snowy twilight. She felt Jaken fumble awkwardly behind her and sighed testily. The little toad was still trying his best not to touch her; apparently, he remained too deeply disgusted by the scene he had inadvertently witnessed a few days before. At least once an hour since they'd resumed their travels, he'd find some way to remind her that he was forever traumatized and mentally scarred by the hideous sight of her nauseatingly bizarre human physique. _Well _--- she realized, trying to imagine things from his point of view --- _he did have an entirely different set of aesthetics!  
_  
But while Jaken seemed revolted by her physical appearance, it was clear that he had NO qualms or resentment at this new bond between herself and Sesshoumaru. The young woman supposed she should have known he would have accepted this so easily though --- _after all, hadn't the small youkai even predicted that this deeper relationship was inevitable?  
_  
She shifted in the saddle, filled with genuine curiosity as to how he might have known. "Jaken-sama, ummm, I'm sorry about the other day. It must have been a real shock to you --- well, sort of."  
  
The toad looked up at her in surprise, actually seeming to be somewhat grateful for this chance to break the spell of silence. "Stupid human," he muttered. "I told you I knew it was bound to happen."  
  
Rin blushed, wondering how silly and desperate her long-standing infatuation with the taiyoukai must have seemed to those around her. But while HER heart and HER feelings might have always appeared so obvious --- _what about Sesshoumaru? Why on earth would Jaken ever make such a bold assumption about him?  
_  
She brushed a loose tendril of her long bangs behind her ear, and twisted further around to face the grouchy old toad, finally catching those puffy yellow eyes. "How did you know this would happen? And for how long?" she inquired, trying to keep any excitement from creeping into her soft voice  
  
With a most devilish smile Jaken decided to offer his reply quickly, realizing he could very easily sneak a few clever jibes (at Rin's expense) into his explanation. "Well, not from the start, that's for certain! Back in those early days, I don't know how our lord put up with you! I can't tell you how often I implored him to just toss you in some river and run like mad! But from the very beginning, you'd changed him --- somehow. I don't understand it at all." The small toad sighed and looked into the distance, as he swept a few building snowflakes from his fine robes. "But, whatever you did, as I've said before, this Jaken is actually quite grateful for it."  
  
"Grateful?" she whispered.  
  
"Of course," he answered smugly. "I know how to deal with you! We have our places --- and we are happy with them! Believe me child, if a powerful, ego- driven demoness came into this mix, we --- ohhhhhh --- we would all suffer!" Jaken shuddered uneasily. "So, like I said, I am rather thankful he has chosen you!"  
  
Rin turned away quickly to puzzle over these last words, all the while trying to disguise her scowl. With a small cry, she suddenly decided she was too deeply offended to hide her face or let that little remark slide unchallenged. She whirled around in the saddle again and, without warning, whacked Jaken on the skull with the blunt shaft of her naginata. "Why you -- - Jaken-sama, just what do you mean by that? Are you saying I'm weak!?"  
  
Jaken squealed in outrage, ripped off his crushed hat to rub at his lumpy head, and then raced across Aun's scaly back to confront her nose-to-nose. "Why you rotten little --- no, you idiot! I don't think you're weak! You have saved this Jaken, shed your foolish tears for him, and fussed over him!" He fixed her with a sly grin. "Of course, you have also taken years off his life as well, with your ceaseless, dull chatter, and your willfulness and disobedience! Like right now for example!" He glared at the still brandished naginata. "Why, I should break that thing in two right now!"  
  
"If you did, the Nintojou would be next, I promise you!" she threatened, raising her tiny fist in warning.  
  
Jaken marched back to the far edge of the Aun's leather cantle with a derisive sniff. "Hmnph."  
  
"Hmnph, yourself!"  
  
They settled down into sulking silence once more, each fixing the other with their most intimidating glares. Several long minutes passed before Rin's boredom overpowered her urge to pout, and, desperate for some answers, she rolled her eyes and attempted to initiate a new conversation. With an impatient huff, she reached over and poked the toad repeatedly on his bony shoulder. "Jaken-sama, alright," she whined, knowing full well that the wheedling tone was sure to annoy his sensitive ears. "I apologiiiiiiiize!'  
  
"What!?" the small youkai screeched while trying unsuccessfully to hide his triumphant grin. "This Jaken couldn't hear you!" He slapped at her small hand crossly. "AND --- quit touching me! Quit touching me or so help me I'll call our Master over here and he'll make this dragon stop so fast --- you need to settle down and STAY ON YOUR SIDE OF AUN!" Hefting the Nintojou, the irate youkai drew an imaginary line across the beast's saddle, daring the young woman to invade his staked 'territory'.  
  
Rin glanced ahead at Sesshoumaru once more. The taiyoukai was still diligently scouting the terrain below for threats, seemingly oblivious to both his companions and their latest row. "Call him then! I'd love to hear HIS thoughts on your little comment!" she giggled, her eyes filling with ruthless glee. "If I know Sesshoumaru-sama --- and I do --- he'll make you walk the rest of the way. And I promise, kaeru-chan, I'd laugh the whoooooole, loooong time"  
  
Jaken's eyes narrowed at her insult. "Little-frog?! How dare you --- you impertinent, insignificant---" His mind quickly filled with images of himself trudging through waist-deep snow. "Ohhh --- you think you're so clever!" he seethed. "Fine, you win!"  
  
Savoring her tiny victory, Rin reached forward to offer Aun's twin necks a few friendly scratches while the dragon rumbled his contentment. Out of the corner of her eye, she suddenly noticed Jaken was hunched up rather miserably --- as if her last comment had hurt him more than she'd intended. She bit her lip, suddenly seeing things from the toad's point of view again, and abruptly realized that the poor creature might actually be terrified that he was being replaced! That Sesshoumaru would no longer require his services or want his companionship now that she seemed to hold a more eminent position and role in his life! "Oh stop --- don't be mad at me," the young woman soothed quickly. "Jaken-sama! I'm sorry I was a bit rude!"  
  
The little toad looked up suspiciously, years of dealing with her quick wit causing him to be somewhat wary for her next inevitable, teasing joke. "Are you sorry about ALL the times you were rude?" he wheedled.  
  
She shook her head in exasperation, not willing to offer more of an apology than was necessary --- after all, **HE** had started this! "Please stop! Come on --- you're as bored as I am! I just want to talk!"  
  
In the next instant, they had fully resumed their squabbling. "You always want to talk!" Jaken roared. "Being silent for more than five minutes would actually be good for you!" Instead of brushing the snow from his brown robes again, he gathered as much of the powder as he could into his fist to hurl at her. "Besides, if you want to talk so badly, why don't you go talk to your precious Seccchoumaruuuu-chaaaaama!"  
  
Rin dodged the snowball and clapped her hands to her mouth to try to stifle her peals of bright laughter. "Because," she choked out as she tried to catch her breath. "Because he's not like that!"  
  
Aun suddenly swung to avoid a sharp current of driving air, and she drew her cloak tighter around her form to shield herself from the now stinging hail. The young woman stared into the distance once more, searching the sky for her master, her expression full of concern and longing. The demon lord was still gliding swiftly before of them, now scowling at the rapidly worsening weather. "And besides he's busy at the moment," she murmured in a more serious tone. "I don't ever want him to think I need him to coddle and pamper me every five minutes!"  
  
Jaken's brusque, confrontational manner all but vanished and he fixed her with a slow, approving nod. "Sometimes --- not often --- but sometimes, you are a very wise child," he mumbled under his breath.  
  
Rin gasped at this unanticipated praise. Recovering quickly, she simply repeated, "And sometimes --- not often --- but sometimes --- you are a very good friend and teacher, Jaken-sama."  
  
The toad grumbled again and turned away to hide his emotions, rubbing his tiny hands before him in attempt to restore circulation. Though feeling considerably warmer in his little heart, his body was nearly frozen! Due to that last plunge through the clouds they were now soaking wet and, in the failing light, the temperature was turning steadily colder with each passing moment. Trying to keep out of the gale, he ducked down behind Rin, instantly becoming aware of how hard the girl was shivering herself.  
  
"Jaken-sama, how much further do you think we're going today?" she asked, trying to keep her teeth from chattering as she leaned into the small youkai's back. "And --- where are we going? It's been a few days now --- did Sesshoumaru-sama say anything to you?"  
  
"No," Jaken replied glumly, pausing to break a large icicle off Aun's saddle-skirt. "I thought YOU would have asked him by now."  
  
Rin shook her head. "So much has changed --- and I guess I just want some things to remain as they were. I never asked him such questions before. I've always followed him --- no matter where. I've always trusted in our master. I always will. Does --- does that make sense to you, Jaken-sama?"  
  
"Perfectly." The small youkai answered promptly just as they spun through another thick, drenching cloud. "This J-jaken feels the s-same," he sputtered, wringing the excess water from his frosty sleeve. "So then, scrawny human, it doesn't really matter where we're going --- does it?"  
  
Rin bit her nearly blue lower lip. "Of c-course not! I-I was just curious, that's all! Gods --- even t-though I can't feel my toes and I have to ride along with boring, smelly, cranky, old you --- it's good to be w-wandering again, eh Jaken-sama?!" she teased, poking him once more, reveling in her ability to irritate him.  
  
The laughing young woman was forced to duck quickly to avoid the ensuing well-aimed swipe from the Nintojou ---

* * *

Sesshoumaru sped further ahead to hide his amusement at that latest little spat between his companions. Despite the wind and driving snow, he could make out every word of their conversation and he was actually quite pleased: the simple fact that Jaken and Rin had resumed their pointless bickering was the perfect indicator that life had returned to normal. The loneliness and unease of the past few months was already nothing more than a bad memory.  
  
They had departed from his ancestral home several days ago, easily falling back into the familiar rhythms of their old wandering lifestyle. _Yes_, Rin had NEVER asked him where they were heading. He supposed she could have and he wouldn't really have been affronted ---  
  
But --- but she didn't.  
  
The very same moment he had indicated he was ready to resume their journey, she had simply risen gracefully to her feet, collected her naginata and heavy winter over-robe, and moved to wait at the door, unable to mask the excitement in her hazel eyes. And then, once the gate of the shiro had closed securely behind them, she had merely flashed him another cheerful smile and taken command of Aun's reins.  
  
It was if nothing had changed and, even now, he felt a distinctive swell of pride just thinking about it.  
  
Rin, it appeared, had most definitely taken his words to heart and was obviously attempting to make good on her vow to him. Over these past few days, she had been distant and aloof, her behavior a perfect model of his own dignified aura. She knew him all too well, realizing almost instinctively when to grant him his space and when to draw near, purposefully seeking not to appear too overly clingy or emotional. But, he smiled wryly, while she imitated his reserved disposition as they traveled, it was quite another story when they rested. Sheltered in groves of evergreens, or cocooned under the warmth of his long, downy tail and away from prying eyes, their relationship continued much as it had in the West. She was still shy, apparently just as eager as he to proceed slowly and keep these changes a secret reserved between the members of his strange little following.  
  
On this day, they had begun their travels even before the sun had risen, and Sesshoumaru now suspected his companions were very nearly frozen and in desperate need of rest. Screening his eyes from the blinding glare of the snow and hail, he paused in mid-air and waited until they drew nearer, hoping to get a closer look at Rin. Though the taiyoukai had merely planned to sneak this quick glimpse to observe the girl for any signs of fatigue, at the sight of the young woman he couldn't help but pause a moment longer in admiration.  
  
_As always, she was truly lovely_ --- even more so now with her form framed by all those heavy storm clouds streaming wildly behind her. He sought to memorize everything about the girl in that instant --- from the way her hair rippled in the fierce wind, trying to stubbornly escape from the two silver combs pinning it, to the mischievous sparkle in her eyes, to how her figure seemed so helplessly lost in those damn clothes she'd raided from his room! Sesshoumaru shook his head as he noted Rin held Aun's long reins in a rather loose grip, a clear sign that she had been granting the beast the freedom to dive playfully in the strong air currents while she thought HIS attention had been focused strictly on the terrain ahead. In her other hand, he noticed, she clutched her naginata tightly to her side as if she were some formidable, hardened warrior.  
  
_Actually_, he mused, _between the intimidating weapon, her new confident posture and her rich attire, one could almost mistake her for a demoness_. _Well, almost_, he amended quickly. For despite her outward appearance, he could sense that her heart rate had fallen dramatically and, even from this distance, he could see her tremble violently from the cold.  
  
But though she was visibly uncomfortable, he could still make out her pleasant, gentle voice and he shook his head again in bemused wonder. Over the howling wind, he could very clearly hear the calming, lulling sounds of her singing quietly to herself.  
  
_Singing?_ _Yes, Rin was singing that old familiar song again_, and the taiyoukai sighed inwardly, realizing in dismay that the tune would now most likely become hopelessly stuck in his mind for the next few hours. Thankfully, the melody was quickly drowned out by familiar grumbling and he shifted his glance to stare back at Jaken. At the moment, the toad was definitely not as cheerful or as high-spirited as the girl  
  
"Sugu tomaru zo!" he called out to them, his amber eyes softening when they met Rin's. "We will rest soon." He turned quickly and resumed his flight, gesturing for Aun to pick up his pace.

* * *

Rin straightened at his words and pursed her lips, studying the snowy landscape below. Passing the time by guessing where he intended to make camp had always been a little game of hers. She burst into a broad grin as their 'mysterious' destination became apparent immediately --- the black, curling smoke rising from a tall mountain range rapidly growing on the horizon left little doubt. After all, that place had served as her temporary home for months, and she had spent week after week exploring those sharp peaks and wind-swept, craggy valleys! No doubt about it --- they were heading to Totosai's forge! Despite the whistling wind, she hastily tried to smooth her hair and straighten her travel-worn robes, but met with little success.  
  
Giving up on her appearance, but still full of nervous energy, Rin flexed her grip on the reins until her fingers went white. Though it had only been a few weeks since she has last seen Ojii-sama, so much had changed! She couldn't wait to show the old demon how happy she was --- to show him how well his cunning scheme had actually worked! And she really wanted to thank him once again for all his thoughtful care! She dug in with her heels, urging Aun to race faster still, looking forward to the prospect of warming herself by the fire with a cup of steaming, hot tea. And perhaps later, she mused excitedly, she could finally show her master all the curious treasures and weapons held within the forge! Surely, he would at least enjoy that!  
  
Rin watched as Sesshoumaru touched down gracefully on the rough outcropping of the tallest peak and, several minutes later, she arrived behind him, guiding Aun in small, ever-decreasing circles above the weather-beaten mouth of the cavern. Though Jaken squawked loudly in protest of her seemingly sluggish descent, the girl merely shrugged off his complaints; after all, if Momo was nearby she wanted to be sure the irritable old bull got a good look at the dragon so he wouldn't spook or be needlessly frightened. _That wouldn't be good_, she mused, stifling quick images of the two unusual beasts involved in some ridiculous territorial brawl. And --- and --- she wanted this unanticipated visit to be perfect! This was to be her first interaction with 'outsiders' since her whole world had changed, after all!  
  
When they finally did land on the wide ledge, she hopped excitedly from Aun's back to race to the waiting taiyoukai. She very quickly remembered herself and paused in momentary embarrassment before turning her pointed chin into the air and slowing her steps to march the remainder of the distance.  
  
Sesshoumaru threw her a perplexed look as she moved to approach him. She thought she heard him murmur her name, and looked up in time to catch his fleeting smile and approving nod as she made her way slowly, regally, to his side. _That's right! Try not to make yourself look like a silly little girl anymore_, she scolded herself inwardly. _Gods, how she wanted him to see! She wanted to prove to him that he had made the right choice! That SHE could be as subtle, refined and stately as any youkai woman!  
_  
"Well, well," came a scratchy voice from the darkness of the cave. "Look at you! Almost didn't recognize you, missy!" Totosai stepped out onto the wind- blown ledge, brushing soot from his brow as he regarded them curiously. The instant she caught sight of her old guardian, Rin forgot all about her concerns to appear polished and lady-like, and raced into his arms to wrap the old demon in a fierce hug.  
  
"Well, hello, my dear. I've missed you too!" he laughed, dragging the small girl around in a swift half-circle, her toes skimming lightly over the freshly-fallen snow. "You look lovely. This spoiled hound been treating you well, I hope?"  
  
"Oh, yes," she whispered, blushing profusely as memories of just HOW well Sesshoumaru had been treating her lately flashed most distractingly through her mind. "I am very happy." Rin nodded vigorously and offered another shy grin. Her grin died abruptly though, as she noted that the old man's beady eyes were no longer focused on her but were now resting squarely on her master and were filled with deep loathing, anger and disappointment. She shifted her own gaze back to Sesshoumaru, her face growing pale at finding him returning Totosai's glare with equal malice.  
  
Trying her best to ignore this completely un-called for, but rather **OBVIOUS**, tension, Rin cleared her throat, and offered the old man a reassuring pat on the shoulder. "It's been wonderful to return to the West," she continued somewhat uneasily. "To be home again, if only for a short time --- I ---"  
  
"Machinasai! Machinasai!!" Totosai abruptly shouted, interrupting her words as he noted her soggy clothes and damp hair. "Come on inside, before you freeze! You're soaking wet! How long have you been like this!?" He paused to throw another accusing glare at Sesshoumaru. "Come in and get out of this cold now! That means all of you!"  
  
The wiry demon ushered Rin deep into the foundry, holding her still shivering hand to help her pick her way through the maze of armor and weaponry, all in various states of completion and laying haphazardly amongst the rocks. Jaken followed close behind them, his mouth agape at all the power radiating from the many gleaming blades hanging from the grey walls. The toad screeched in surprise as he received a rather nasty shock when he foolishly reached for a half-finished kabuto. Sesshoumaru tracked in last, completely ignoring his tiny retainer's stupidity and pain. Though equally fascinated himself by the many terrible weapons, he was still focused on the rather rude greeting he had received from the sword-smith. He stared ahead at Rin as she chatted happily with Totosai, and tried not to grimace in disgust at the specks of soot that drifted through the stifling air to land upon his fine white robes and hair.  
  
They stopped before a rough workbench, and that bug-eyed, mad demon excitedly held up piece after piece of fang, bone and iron, explaining to HIS Rin where each pathetic bit had come from, what they would be crafted into, and --- and --- he was beginning to lose ALL patience.  
  
"This Sesshoumaru did not come to this stinking hole for a lesson in metallurgy," he stated, seeking to repay the sword-smith's initial contempt with equal venom of his own.  
  
Totosai drew in a deep breath, and, in the next instant, his strange, rather strained grin faded altogether. A deep bitter pain filled his eyes and he focused on Sesshoumaru with a cruel coldness Rin had never before seen the old man display. "Then to what DO I owe the honor, my lord?" he grated curtly, his entire posture becoming stiff and unwelcoming again.  
  
The taiyoukai glowered, and stalked forward to pull Rin away from his bony arms. Of course, this disrespectful fool would still seek to defy him, but for the girl's sake he would TRY to rein in his temper. "I wish to know if you have heard any news about a creature called Naraku, old man."  
  
"Naraku, eh?" Totosai scoffed, throwing one last forlorn glance at the young woman before moving slowly to the fireside and returning to his work. "Still all bothering with him, are ya? If you're so interested in finding him, why don't you go ask your otouto where he is?"  
  
The demon lord snorted arrogantly, now dragging the rather bewildered Rin protectively to his side. "Obviously your mind has still not improved. This Sesshoumaru would rather burn in the fires of the underworld than seek the aid of that miserable son of a ---"  
  
"Fires of the underworld, eh? How 'bout the flames right here? I can at least arrange that," Totosai quipped, pumping the massive bellows of the forge till the coals flared white-hot.  
  
The taiyoukai's eyes widened in absolute shock and then narrowed in unbridled anger. _Nobody spoke to him that way! Nobody! What right did Totosai have --- why was he being so _--- he suddenly caught the old man's glance as it traveled quickly over that telling mark on Rin's neck. _Of course!_ he seethed within his mind. _That was why the crazy fool was behaving in this manner! But --- that mark --- that mark was none of his damned concern!  
_  
As the heavy air began to fill with a distinctly floral fragrance, Rin raced forward to quickly position herself between the two angry demons. "Heh, heh, my lord," she soothed nervously, hoping to pacify her master before he lost all tolerance in dealing with the other youkai. "Ojii-sama is merely joking. Isn't that right, Ojii-sama?"  
  
But instead of letting his grim, confrontational attitude fade, Totosai's wrinkly expression became even more enraged and his eyes filled with great pity as he turned quickly away from her. Rin pressed her hand over her heart in cold fear --- _could she have accidentally done something to disappoint the usually kind old demon?  
_  
The sword-smith returned to his work yet again, pounding rather aggressively at an already flat sheet of iron with his long mallet. Somehow Rin got the distinct impression that he was currently envisioning her master's head under the hammer instead!  
  
"Hmmph." Totosai snorted, directing his scowl at Sesshoumaru once more. "Well, if you're really serious about tracking Naraku then you SHOULD seek out Inuyasha's aid because chances are your brother already knows where he is. Isn't that right, my little friend?" The demon's tone softened considerably and he waved absently towards someone or something in the corner. "Wait. Where'd ya go?!" he asked, blinking in great confusion.  
  
All at once, Rin felt a sharp sting on her arm. She let out a clipped squeak, and Sesshoumaru whirled around in surprise, hand automatically reaching for Toukijin as he angrily searched out the culprit behind her pain. Puzzled, he watched as she winced and slapped repeatedly at her own wrist. He relaxed marginally, quickly realizing the poor girl wasn't under any 'real' threat. "Myouga," he drawled in a bored monotone, correctly guessing the source of her discomfort. "I should have known." The taiyoukai's keen golden eyes followed the small, now flattened, flea as he floated down to the ashy floor. "I will only say this once --- Keep away from her."  
  
"C-certainly, my lord," the poor creature echoed submissively, as he struggled to right himself. "It won't h-happen again."  
  
Jaken sniffed in disdain, and glared condescendingly down at the undignified servant of the lowly hanyou. "Impudent little blood-sucker! Perfect, just what we need. **More** vermin." he quipped, staring pointedly from Rin to the tiny, groaning insect. The girl gave the toad a swift kick in the shins.  
  
"Vermin!" screeched Myouga, bouncing angrily into the air, shaking his many fists at the slur. "I'll have you know that** I** was the vassal of the Great Inutaisho! Not a miserable, dirt-scraping, foul, little ---  
  
His insult died as Jaken promptly squished him again under his scaly heel. Rin flinched in sympathy and shook her dark head.  
  
Grumbling loudly in his building aggravation, Totosai appeared at her side to guide her further away from the two shouting youkai. "Better step this way, my dear," he whispered. "If there's one thing worse than sibling rivalry, it's side-kick rivalry and I don't want you to get hurt right now." Trying to stifle her laughter, she followed her former guardian and together they edged closer to the welcome warmth of the blazing hearth. She couldn't help but stare back at Jaken and his miniature opponent with great interest, however --- _this could be rather amusing actually!  
_  
But the petty little squabble was never given a chance to escalate. "Jaken," Sesshoumaru stated quietly. "Leave him be." The demon lord stalked across the cavern, leaning over the momentarily grateful, wide-eyed and trembling little creature. "If he is clever and as loyal to my family as he claims, he will now tell this Sesshoumaru whatever rumors he has heard."  
  
"Well, young master," Myouga stammered, trying to avoid gazing into those predatory golden eyes. "I don't know much about Naraku, except that I delivered a message regarding his whereabouts --- to --- your --- brother -- - er, I mean Inuyasha --- oh --- please --- my --- lord --- please --- don't --- smile --- at --- me --- I'm nervous enough as it is ---"  
  
The taiyoukai's wicked, murderous grin only widened, as he reached down and seized the hapless flea between his thumb and forefinger. "Is that so, Myouga? Does this Sesshoumaru **frighten** you?" The orange glow of the flames cast him in a frightful light, as sinister shadows danced over his cold face in eerie, twisting patterns. He loomed closer ---  
  
Myouga squeaked in panic as green poison began to steadily build on the demon's long claws, narrowly missing him as it dripped down to sizzle on the cavern floor. "You will repeat this message --- **NOW**," the demon lord commanded. "Once again, I will only ask you once."  
  
From her place by the fire, Rin shivered at that soft, dangerous voice. The young woman's memories flashed painfully, taking her back to the night when Sesshoumaru had spoken to HER in such a cold, unfeeling manner. Her heart began to race, as she thought back to those awful, heart-wrenching moments when he had looked upon HER with the same hate and disdain ---  
  
_Gods, this just wasn't right!_ something in her mind protested fiercely. Though a staunch ally of Inuyasha's, this harmless little flea demon HAD served as a loyal servant to her master's great father! Surely, if they merely asked politely, Myouga would share the message and volunteer the information without delay. There was no need for this --- this torture! "Sesshou --- maru --- please," Rin gasped, her mind still swirling with images of being trapped underneath his powerful body --- trapped underneath his body as he laughed at her agony, shame and fear. But before she beg the great youkai to stop, however, Totosai's scratchy voice boomed out from behind her ---  
  
"Knock it off!" the smith shouted, racing angrily to Myouga's aid. "The only reason I'm even slightly tolerating your detestable presence in **MY** house is because of this young lady here and I won't have you threatening and terrorizing my other guests!"  
  
"No, no! It's alright!" squeaked Myouga, still dangling helplessly in the dog demon's claws. He whimpered, knowing full well that there was really nothing Totosai could do to save him if Sesshoumaru truly had it in his vicious mind to see him dead. "Inuyasha was given a message from Kouga of the wolf demon tribe! He headed up north, my lord, that's all I know! The young wolf-prince --- he said he might have an idea where Naraku is, b-but he left no clues in the message --- I swear it!"  
  
"Wolves, you say?" Sesshoumaru gritted in revulsion as he glanced at Rin. Just as he feared, the girl was pale and shaken, and her eyes were wild and panicked. But --- but he was almost certain it wasn't just from the mention of the ookami. Though he still knew her to be rather terrified of those loathsome creatures, the scent of her fear had flared before Myouga had even made mention of them! The taiyoukai stared down at his own sharp claws and he gasped in shock. _At this moment --- was she --- was she frightened of HIM?  
_  
Feeling slightly sick to his stomach at her obvious horror, he quickly dispersed his youki and within seconds, the acid at his fingertips evaporated into nothingness. He quickly flicked Myouga into the nearest wall and swiftly moved towards her, his expression softening in his unexpected deep concern. "Rin," he murmured. "Heeki???"  
  
"Yes, my lord," she answered, quickly coming back to herself to offer him a quivering half-smile. "It's nothing. Rin is just exhausted from the long day's journey and the cold weather."  
  
Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed as Totosai released a quick, disapproving snort. Obviously, he mused, the old man was perfectly aware of the way the young woman would speak when she had something to hide.  
  
"Poor little thing," the smith sympathized, not really referring to Rin's present physical condition. _She was so young and naïve --- so trusting. If only her could make her see!_ During those months she had stayed with him, she had finally begun to come into her own, and now ---  
  
_If only he had just a bit more time with her! Just one more night even!_ All at once, a rather brilliant plan began to form in his scattered mind and he reached out to pat Rin's pale hand. "I told you that you would always be welcome here, missy! You should get out of those wet clothes and rest in your OLD room tonight," he offered slyly.  
  
The taiyoukai looked up in surprise at this sudden suggestion. He had merely meant this visit as a means to discover any news about his enemies and then to continue on with his travels. After all, he knew of plenty of dry caves and sheltered valleys were they might spend the night, and he wasn't exactly comfortable with the thought of accepting any kind of aid from this insane old man who obviously had some sort of new grudge against him.  
  
"This Sesshoumaru has other plans." he answered curtly, seeking to squash any debate before it even started. He turned on his heel, his long, purposeful strides bearing him unmistakably towards the exit.  
  
"Right, well unless YOUR plans include using your Father's sword to revive your FAITHFUL companions again, then you'd better stay here." Totosai shot back sarcastically. "Another storm's already started --- you'll kill these two if you set foot out there tonight!"  
  
"Storm?" Sesshoumaru gritted airily, as he continued to stalk towards the mouth of the cavern. "I smell NOTHING." He stepped back onto the ledge, growling in pure shock and anger at the heaping drifts of snow already piled before the sharp fangs of the demon's jaw that formed the entryway to the forge. He squinted into the prevailing darkness, his white hair snapping wildly in the raging wind, the hail stones stinging at his handsome, now sulking face ---  
  
That old bastard had trapped him again.  
  
Adding insult to injury, he could clearly see the distinctive form of Aun, as the dragon slept, snuggled contentedly next to that obnoxious, old, fat cow in a fluffy snow-bank. There was no way they were moving now. The demon lord snarled in aggravation as Totosai moved to stand beside him with a smug, patronizing smile. "No offense, Wan-chan., but looks like your nose doesn't work so well in here. Though I thought I already **PROVED** that to you once before." He gestured over to Rin as she grinned up at him somewhat sheepishly.  
  
"Don't worry, Lord Sesshoumaru --- don't be embarrassed! Neither your Honorable Father nor Master Inuyasha can sniff things out properly while in this place!" Myouga supplied a bit too cheerily as he bounced excitedly on Totosai's shoulder. "It's not just YOUR senses that are weakened at this forge!" The lively little flea suddenly caught the full brunt of the taiyoukai's furious gaze, and quickly snapped his mouth shut to choke down his remaining words. "W-well --- p-perhaps weakened i-isn't the best w-word ---" he stuttered, swiftly hopping away in his renewed horror.  
  
With an exasperated sigh, Sesshoumaru conceded this minor defeat, and followed them --- **reluctantly** --- back into the warmth of the cave.

* * *

Soon after setting Jaken up on a small pallet in the weapons room, Rin returned to the main cavern, pausing for a moment in the shadows to stare wistfully at her master as he gazed into the bright flames of the forge with a faraway look.  
  
_He was so damn beautiful --- so damn breath-taking_. _And SO damn dangerous_, she sighed inwardly, suddenly thinking back to his heavy-handed approach in dealing with such a weak creature as Myouga.  
  
_Such a weak but TRICKY creature as Myouga_, she amended wryly, realizing that the small flea had presently snuck off to disappear somewhere unnoticed again. She glanced down at her bare arms, half expecting to feel that maddening little sting at any given moment. The young woman shook her head slowly --- _yes_, she'd definitely have to give her room a thorough inspection before she closed her eyes tonight. After all, she had no wish to turn into an easy meal as she slept! She giggled aloud at her own thoughts, and blinked in surprise as Sesshoumaru finally noticed her presence and fixed her with those striking eyes. Those striking, ancient and sad eyes. Looking at him now, Rin suddenly felt afraid again, though she couldn't even fathom the full reasons why.  
  
Without a word, she nodded her head shyly and beckoned for him to follow her deeper into the sloping hallways that branched off from the back of the main cavern. She had never realized how small and narrow these dimly lit corridors were until she had seen her master try to negotiate them now. His tall, imposing frame seemed to fill the whole space, his large shadow cutting off the flickering torch-light. Time and time again, she found herself pausing in her tracks to stare back into his strange, inhuman eyes, fascinated by the way they seemed to shimmer with a pale greenish-white glow in the darkness.  
  
Rin smiled nervously, as they finally reached her rough stone doorway "Ummm, this was mine --- when I lived here," she whispered, not really knowing what else to say.  
  
"I can tell," he answered quietly. "Your scent is strongest here." He reached out to cup her cheek and guided her closer to lean against his armored chest. "Tears. I smell your tears."  
  
The young woman inhaled deeply, not really wishing to remember the past few months. "Every night," she explained sadly. "Every night, I used to wish you would come back for me. I used to wish I could go back to that battlefield and do ---"  
  
She quickly hid her face from him, not sure how she was going to finish that last statement. She was going to say that she wished she could have done things differently that night, but --- _but that wasn't exactly true, was it_? _No_, she stated firmly in her mind, _it most certainly wasn't_. During that last battle, she still couldn't imagine herself waiting for him, pacing in the shadows, wondering if he was wounded or in pain or --- or worse.  
  
Rin felt a small tremor course down her spine at the morose nature of her thoughts. _What did the future hold? And what of that damn promise she made the morning after they made love? Her promise to obey him --- to stay out of danger?  
_  
She reached up to toy with a lock of his silver hair, still so intrigued by its soft, delicate texture, and wished all this doubt and confusion would just go away. "But --- we don't have to talk about that, Sesshoumaru! You'll lie with me here tonight, just like I dreamed of back then!"  
  
She felt him tense and the thought that had been worrying her since the moment the forge had come into view sprung into the forefront of her mind. "You WILL lie with me tonight, Sesshoumaru?" she asked, shuffling her feet on the dusty floor. "I mean, I know that other demons are here --- and --- and with me being human ---"  
  
The taiyoukai grasped her pointed chin, tilted her head back and pressed his fingers against her lips to silence her. "I will stay with you. This Sesshoumaru does not care about the opinions of some cowardly parasite and one lunatic old man," he responded, and for the slightest of moments, his lips twisted into a bored sneer at reminding himself of the utterly useless Totosai and Myouga.  
  
"But after them," Rin murmured despondently, suddenly remembering the coming journey ahead. "Others --- others will find out, won't they? These past few days, I have tried to be --- I've tried to --- I don't want to shame you." Afraid of what he might say, she broke away from his grip and quickly returned to focus to her own bare feet.  
  
Sesshoumaru choose not answer the girl's concerns, but merely reached for her again, backing her steadily under the threshold and into her old unlit chamber. The taiyoukai glanced around swiftly, still able to see in the inky gloom and finding himself moderately satisfied with the humble accommodations. _Well, more than moderately satisfied_, he thought, as he caught sight of that rather inviting-looking natural spring bubbling in the corner, and the cozily-small bed carved into the far wall. He smiled as Rin clung more tightly to his shoulders, reveling in the way that she was completely dependent upon him in these pitch-black shadows. "You do not wish to shame me?" he asked, eyes drifting shut at the sheer pleasure of having this sweet, engaging creature in his arms again. "Really? Is that the reason why you have been ignoring this Sesshoumaru then?"  
  
Now it was Rin's turn to be shocked. "Ignoring you?" she repeated, rather dazed that someone who acted as bored and indifferent as he would be disappointed by her lack of attention. "But I thought --- I thought you would like me better if I behaved more like some high-born lady rather than a ---" Her words were silenced in the best possible way. Unable to really see anything in front of her face now that his gleaming eyes were quite obviously closed, she was startled by the sudden feeling of his lips pressed against hers.  
  
Sesshoumaru broke away an instant later. "But that is not the Rin that I have come to know," he stated gently, his husky words breathed against the whorls of her tiny ear.  
  
_That is not the Rin I have come to care for. That is not the Rin I have come to love_, whispered that hideously sentimental voice in his mind again --- the one he still could simply not give voice to. He opted instead to cut off any further rebuttal with another quick kiss and merely whispered, "I would prefer it if you would be yourself."  
  
Rin bit her lip and stood on her tip-toes to thread her small arms about his neck, fingers reaching into the soft hair at his nape. "Hontou ni?" she queried, gazing into those glowing predatory eyes again. Without waiting for his answer, her soft, cool hands were moving again, trailing across the planes of his cheeks. She pulled the demon down to her, embracing him tightly in the darkness.

* * *

Sesshoumaru couldn't sleep. This place was too damn unfamiliar. Smoky and grey and wholly uncomfortable and --- and, on top of it all, there was that unearthly racket that insane old creature was making at this ungodly hour! _Why the hell did he ever agree to spend the night here in the first place? _He tossed irritably under the covers, and willed sleep to take him. He turned first to one side and then to the other, trying to calm himself by staring into the sweet face of the peacefully slumbering Rin.  
  
It didn't help.  
  
As he stared at her thick lashes and the gentle rise and fall of her chest, all he could do was shake his head in amazement at the very fact that she could sleep through this at all.  
  
_To hell with the storm ---_ he couldn't stay here. He sat up in the small bed with an edgy, building groan.  
  
Rin released a small sigh as he accidentally jostled her, and that small sound quickly snapped him back into reality. The girl needed to rest. If the disgusting little flea was correct, it was a long journey to the northern mountains and all of his companions would need their sleep to preserve their strength.  
  
He placed a small, quick kiss on the girl's forehead, and quietly rose, pausing to rearrange the covers around her frame. After all of Totosai's thoroughly angry stares and thoroughly provoking snide little comments, he had little doubt the old man was making this ghastly noise just to torture him on purpose. And worst of all --- ever since he had noticed the old man staring at Rin's throat, he knew the real reason for his anger and it riled him to no end. He paced back down the darkened corridor. If he was going to be stuck in this forsaken stinking hole for the night, there was no way he was going to allow that crazy demon to think he had outwitted him again. He was going to put a quick end to this.  
  
Sesshoumaru reached the main chamber and approached Totosai from behind, his movements leisurely and unhurried, his expression characteristically arrogant and smug. He was slightly surprised as the old man peeked over his shoulder, somehow managing to notice his stealthy advance despite the many acrid scents, and the ringing noises of the hammer and the rumble of the flames. Totosai turned to face him, his expression still cold and filled with lingering disgust. "Why are you awake? What the hell do you want?" he gritted through his few clenched teeth.  
  
He met the straggly demon's glare measure-for-measure, but remained motionless --- rooted to the spot. _For Rin's sake, try not to rip him into a thousand bloody pieces where he stands_, Sesshoumaru repeated over and over in his mind, attempting to wrestle down his building anger and remain at least somewhat civil. He raised an elegant hand and gestured absently towards the mallet and roaring fire. "The noise is enough to wake the dead, you fool."  
  
"Well, if you don't like it you can go sleep outside --- like the **DOG** you are." Totosai whirled fully towards the taiyoukai, his hands planted reproachfully on his hips, his expression full of scorn ---  
  
Sesshoumaru snarled in outrage and stomped forward to confront the old man face-to-face. "How dare you?!" he seethed. "I am not some pup eager to learn a new lesson! This Sesshoumaru is attempting to be lenient with you -- - but do not delude yourself into believing you can judge the Lord of the Western Lands! You will not speak in such an insolent manner simply because Rin cares for you! Her feelings will not save you from my claws if you insist on this showing this disrespect ---"  
  
The smith cut off the demon lord's next words with an angry tirade of his own. "Oh, shut up, flea-bag! I already know you don't REALLY care what Rin thinks. You've already made that perfectly obvious! That's why I'm so sickened by you now! Ohhhh --- I suppose you think you're very clever, don't you, boy!"  
  
"These fumes have obviously addled what was left of your powers of reasoning! I do not know what the hell you are raving about, you brain- damaged lunatic!" he snapped back, pausing to swat an un-tempered, sword from a cooling rack in his great rage. _There --- something was broken_. He felt moderately better ---  
  
Totosai raised his ragged eyebrows at that petulant, childish action and his shoulders hunched in annoyance each and every time the sword clattered loudly on the sharp rocks below. He waited till the rattling and scraping had stopped before continuing dramatically with his rant. "Oh really?! You're as terrible at lying as that young girl is herself! You know **EXACTLY **what I'm talking about. I'm talking about Rin and your intentions towards her. Or perhaps lack there of, would be more like it!"  
  
Sesshoumaru rolled his golden eyes and turned quickly, deciding it was best to return to bed before he tore a few more things from the walls in his wrath. "You wanted this Sesshoumaru to take the girl and now that I have, you are angry? Or perhaps you ARE truly senile and merely do not remember?" he goaded over his shoulder. "Whatever the case, I grow tired of you and I will retire back to that --- that pitiful excuse for a room ---"  
  
"Hey! I'm not finished with you!" Totosai hissed, coursing angrily at his heels. He leapt forward to stomp on the taiyoukai's trailing tail, causing the demon lord to choke a sputtered curse in his outrage and swipe out viciously with his poison talons. The laughing old youkai jumped back with surprising agility, pausing to regard the younger demon with a curious expression. "That got ya mad, didn't it! Well, not as mad as I am right now! After all, I didn't return Rin to you so you could turn her into your --- your tayu!"  
  
Sesshoumaru's nostrils flared at that word, as a sudden vision of the damn hanyou's mother flashed uncomfortably into his mind. The dog demon growled, spinning back to seize the old man by his smudged and dusty collar. "Tayu?! You have no clue what you're talking about! And 'return her to me'?! The girl was always MINE to take! Rin wants to remain with this Sesshoumaru --- EIEN NI!"  
  
"She wants to remain as your LOVE, not your --- not your --- I can't even say the real word," the sword-smith trailed off, shaking his gray head sadly. "She deserves more! She deserves more than a selfish, ego-driven, young fool!"  
  
"You ARE insane! First you insist that this Sesshoumaru take the girl and now you are angry that I have!" he bellowed, past caring that for the first time ever he had actually repeated himself in an argument.  
  
"But I thought you'd take more time!" Totosai protested. "I thought you'd sort through **ALL** of your feelings before truly making her your own! Her heart is so much greater than yours --- she IS more than you deserve!  
  
"What's going on?" came a sweet, sleepy voice from the far corridor. Rin padded groggily into the forge and fixed them in turn with her curious, apprehensive stare. "Is everything alright?" she whispered. "My lord? Ojii- sama? Why is everyone up?"  
  
"It's alright. Rin return to your room at once."  
  
"But Sesshoumaru --- daijoubu ne?"  
  
Totosai snorted and mumbled something under his breath that she could not hear. But whatever it was, it caused her master's cheeks to flame scarlet in renewed anger.  
  
"Return to the room! **NOW**, Rin!" he repeated more forcefully, his fine silvery hair swirling about his tall form as his power rose in response to some aberrant, unrestrained emotion.  
  
Rin's jaw dropped open at his odd behavior, and that harsh and strangely desperate tone in his deep voice. She continued to glance back and forth between the two demons in panic. _What was going on?_ Her lord and Totosai had been REALLY fighting again, of that she was sure. Her gaze came to a fixed stop on Sesshoumaru and she gasped, suddenly realizing what he had just asked of her.  
  
_He --- he wanted her to go away?_  
  
She bowed her head and nodded her assent, stealing one last quick glance back at the pair as she marched dutifully, unquestioningly, down the darkened hallway.  
  
_Gods --- she was too tired to deal with this anyway!_ the young woman fumed in unvoiced indignation. But one thing was for sure --- she had never seen Totosai so outraged. And she had never seen her master seem so apprehensive either.  
  
_You're such an idiot!_ she silently chided herself, kicking a stone loose from the uneven floor. _Why did you have to go and announce your presence?_ Sesshoumaru's senses seemed to be overwhelmed by the forge and she was fairly certain she could have snuck up upon them and overheard their whole argument --- if she had been more clever!  
  
Rin continued to curse her own actions as she back-tracked her way slowly down the winding tunnel. She walked numbly past the still blissfully snoring Jaken, successfully resisting the strong urge to knock him awake out of sheer spite. _After all, how the hell was SHE supposed to fall back sleep after this!_ She slunk back to her small chamber, still mulling over the stupidity of this whole situation. _She loved so few people in this world --- hell, she **knew** so FEW people in this world --- so why couldn't they get along if only for a few hours!?_ She hurriedly resettled herself in her bed, violently smacking at her pillows as she tried to cheer herself by remembering the many long nights she had wished for Sesshoumaru to come and find her here. All those fantasies were now realities, she reminded herself over and over. _She was his!_ She flashed a self-satisfied grin at the ceiling, biting her lip coyly, realizing that any minute he would be returning for her ---  
  
"Any minute now," she whispered aloud as her tired eyes drifted closed.

* * *

Rin stirred early the next morning, still feeling slightly dazed as she remembered the events of the night before. Sesshoumaru **HAD** returned to her bed soon after she had nodded off to sleep. He had roused her at once, his manner unusually stern and gruff. Though what had transpired between them had still been admittedly wonderfully, something was very wrong. Her master was demanding, frenzied and forceful, and, though it had been rather exciting to see him so desperate, somehow it just wasn't the same. Where he was always so tender, considerate and slow --- last night --- last night it seemed like his thoughts were elsewhere. She didn't mind his rough passion, but --- but she only wished she knew just what was bothering him so.  
  
With a low groan, Rin finally opened her soft hazel eyes to find her lord already awake, and sitting up in bed as he silently regarded her. "Ohayou," she exclaimed quickly only to be silenced by a fierce kiss. She giggled, trying to lighten his clearly still terrible mood, and twisted her head away as she struggled for breath. "My lord! Not here! Not again! Everyone's awake!"  
  
He merely snarled in response, his hands tightening possessively around her shoulders. He swept aside her long hair, lips moving enticingly over the hollow of her pale throat. She gasped aloud and then gave him a playful slap on the shoulder. "Stop! No --- no! Sesshou --- I mean it! Last night was bad enough! There are too many people here!"  
  
"They were here last night too, yet you did not object." he reasoned seductively, grabbing her by the knees and pushing her down into the kaimaki.  
  
"Yes! But they were asleep!" she argued, crawling forward to scoot agilely across the light blankets and out of his reach. _Why was he looking at her like that? As if she was something to be subdued and conquered?_ "Everyone's awake now!" she reasoned. "They might hear!"  
  
"Kamawanu. This Sesshoumaru does not care," he growled, advancing upon her again.  
  
Rin's face flamed crimson. "But I do," she whispered in a shaky voice. "It's --- it's --- embarrassing."  
  
"Embarrassing?" he echoed incredulously. The demon lord blinked in astonishment as the girl waited nervously, fervently hoping he wasn't truly angry with her. After a long, pregnant pause, he groaned in annoyance and rolled to the edge of the bed. "Come, collect your things," he whispered, bending to retrieve his swords and scattered clothing. "I wish to leave this foul place as soon as possible."

* * *

They made their way back out to the main cavern and Rin's steps faltered as many sets of eyes turned up from the crackling fire to scrutinize her at once. Myouga-jiijii, and Jaken-sama, and Totosai --- and even Aun and Momo, who had obviously plodded in sometime during the night to escape the frightful weather! All just sitting there, regarding her as if she had suddenly sprouted three heads! She shrunk back in deep mortification, wondering what they could all be thinking when they gazed upon her, standing so small and weak next to the towering form of the great Lord Sesshoumaru.  
  
After what felt like hours, they finally dropped their prying gazes, and returned to their breakfasts while conversing blandly with one another.  
  
For what seemed like the fiftieth time in this whole awful day, Rin found herself blushing scarlet as she took her place among them. She just couldn't help it. For despite whatever Tenseiga had done to her body and soul, the fact remained that she was a simple human girl lost and alone amongst powerful demons. And with their heightened, discriminating senses there were layers upon layers of subtle clues and messages flowing through this conversation that she could never even begin to be a part of! She glanced around nervously, suddenly acutely aware that she was essentially blind to half of this awkward exchange. In a single second, THEY could note a quick flash in body temperature, the tempo of blood as it rushed under the skin, the quickened cadence of an anxious heart, or the scent of fear -- -  
  
Or the thick scent arousal or recent mating, her mind whispered in dismay as she glanced down at her form. She rubbed her hands self-consciously on the pale silk of her white hakama. They clearly already knew she had become Sesshoumaru's lover but --- but this was a bit humiliating.  
  
Nevertheless, she forced herself to remain seated in the uneasy circle around the breakfast hearth, clasping her hands together tightly. Quite unexpectedly, her master sunk down to stretch out behind her and ALL conversation died.  
  
**No one spoke.  
**  
In fact, the only sounds now were the dull roar of the flames in the foundry, the slow drip of melted snow as it pooled by the arching entrance to the cavern, and Jaken, who, at the present, was smacking his thin lips and slurping rather loudly at his tea.  
  
Rin swallowed thickly, and glanced back up to her master. Sesshoumaru was so close behind her that she was nearly in his lap and his long clawed hand was draped possessively about her slight shoulder as if he was daring someone to speak to her! It seemed that when the handsome youkai lord wasn't glaring at the other creatures shifting uncomfortably at the fire's edge, he was scowling straight at the rough earthenware mug that had been set before him as if willing the simple piece of pottery to dissolve back into mud. The young woman chewed at her lower lip in her unease, her loyalties torn. Like those first few days when she had returned to her lord, this was another dangerous game, and she worried that she didn't have the experience or the tact to see it through. Everyone was either furious or frightened, and somehow, in some way ---- it had **EVERYTHING** to do with her.  
  
Totosai suddenly fixed her with his glance, his eyes narrowing at the way Sesshoumaru was currently tapping the claw of his forefinger against her collarbone in his obvious agitation. The ancient youkai cleared his throat, coughing up small puffs of dark smoke in the process and finally called out, "Where's that spear of yours, little one? Figure I can take a look at it before you head out on your way."  
  
At his unexpected words, the initially startled Rin leapt to her feet, grateful for something to break the ghastly stillness. She tried to ignore the way Sesshoumaru's hand clutched at her haori for the barest of moments as she rose. She raced eagerly to the entryway, and snatched up her pike with an accomplished smile, suddenly remembering how she had defeated its power and claimed ownership of the naginata at a time that now felt like an age ago. She spun the spear in a graceful, controlled defensive motion, giddily pretending she was parrying some imaginary blow, and abruptly realized that her master had never before seen her brandish it in this manner. Sure, he HAD seen her carry it and use it as a simple tool while they foraged along the white beach back home --- but she had never wielded the naginata for its real purpose. In his presence, she had never before handled as it if it were a weapon! She caught his dark, strangely apprehensive look, and wordlessly --- mutely --- handed the pike over to Totosai as quickly as possible.  
  
The old smith hefted her naginata in his chapped hands, expertly inspecting the shaft and the sharpness of the blade. "This doesn't look like it needs to be whetted or repaired at all. Looks like it's been lying idle, collecting dust in some corner, like it was when you found it! Young lady, have you been continuing with your practicing, or not?" he asked pointedly, his eyes still focused solely on Sesshoumaru.  
  
"Well, no," Rin mumbled, "I have not had the time."  
  
"And how bout your drawings?" The old demon inquired with feigned pleasantry. "Been working on any new designs?"  
  
"No," she answered just as sheepishly. "But, ummmm, I mean to! After all, Sesshoumaru-sama has just graciously provided me with all manner of supplies: parchment and ink and brushes --- I just haven't been able to use them. Well, we've all been too busy."  
  
There was another long, loooong, terrible pause.  
  
"Ahem, I guess that's alright," Totosai finally crowed out happily, as he gestured towards the rough stone workbench. "Luckily, I still have all of your OLD designs and templates lying around. And, well, last night --- I made something special just for you!"  
  
"You made something for ME?!" Rin repeated in disbelief, stepping lightly in the direction he'd indicated.  
  
Sesshoumaru followed the old man's hand as it waved over the varied pieces of armor hanging from the grimy walls. His eyes narrowed once more as they focused on a rather distinctive breast-plate. In an instant, he discerned it was crafted of hammered iron, not bone, which could only mean it was made for a human ---  
  
And, judging by its small size, the human it was intended for would have to be of exceedingly short stature and of astonishingly slight build.  
  
His dark eyebrows furrowed in indignation, and, just as he fully grasped the full situation, his thoughts were interrupted by a delighted gasp from Rin.  
  
"Mine?!" she cried, feeling completely overwhelmed as she ran her slim, feminine fingers across the cold, tempered metal. "It's beautiful!"  
  
Rin continued to stare in utter enthrallment at the finely-crafted piece of armor. It was very different from what her lord currently wore --- consisting only of a single shoulder guard of short, flat overlapping spikes and a simple, narrow polished band to cover the upper-chest. Her dazzling smile widened as she finally focused her attention on the embellished carvings adorning it. It **WAS** one of her designs --- the same motif, in fact, that ran along the silvery shaft of her naginata!  
  
"Sesshoumaru-sama!" she shouted excitedly, racing forward to allow Totosai to begin clasping the armor around her petite figure. "Can you believe this? Isn't it beautiful!" She turned excitedly, wishing there was some manner of looking glass here in the forge so she could admire her new appearance.  
  
Her exhilaration and fervor died as soon as she caught the taiyoukai's eyes again. They were burning with inexplicable anger. "What is the meaning of this, old man?" he snapped, ignoring Rin and rising to his full height to tower over the other demons menacingly.  
  
"I don't know what you're talking about," Totosai responded with an offhanded wave.  
  
"You mean to say you do not find this to be an inappropriate gift?" Sesshoumaru muttered, his tone becoming increasingly heated with each and every syllable. "Are you implying that this Sesshoumaru cannot adequately defend what is his?"  
  
Rin looked up in shock, breath rushing from her lungs, as she was momentarily stunned by both Sesshoumaru's words and the fact that Totosai had just pulled the buckles of her new armor tighter than he probably meant to. At her small squeak, Jaken fixed her with a worried frown, bulbous eyes darting back and forth between his master and the sword-smith. His lord's claws were flexed as if he were preparing to snatch the girl back again. For her sake, he fervently hoped this didn't rocket into some sadistic little tug-of-war! Though she could be a terrible pest at times, and most certainly DID deserve a sound beating now and then, he had no wish to see Rin really injured ---  
  
But the two hostile demons did not seem to notice at all and merely continued on with their bizarre battle for the young woman's 'well-being'.  
  
"Can't defend what's yours! I'm not implying that at all!" Totosai laughed out harshly. "My, isn't this ironic? I seem to remember a time when you were clamoring for my services! Begging like a common village cur! And now I freely offer my talents to your 'mate' and you wish to refuse me?" The crafty youkai's scowl deepened in undisguised resentment. "You selfish hound --- don't you want her to have all the protection she can get?"  
  
Sesshoumaru's nostrils flared. "Of course I do, you half-wit! But I am thinking about the girl's comfort as well. This Sesshoumaru travels quickly and light, and we cannot afford to be slowed down as she struggles in some damned ---"  
  
Totosai's cut him off, his ire growing with each passing moment. "Nonsense, yogoreta baka na inu me, I've crafted this to be especially delicate! It's not much really --- if you'll notice the iron merely shields the **heart**. And what could be more appropriate? After all, these days, that is where Rin needs the most protection --- wouldn't you agree, Inu no TAISHO???" he growled, as smoke began to seep from his throat again.  
  
Rin listened to the exchange with growing dread. _What was that? Protect her heart?_ She turned back to Sesshoumaru, not really surprised to see the strips on his cheeks had nearly flared to purple in his rage. She watched helplessly as the whites of his eyes began to flood with crimson, and cringed when a she heard his knuckles crack threateningly.  
  
"You decayed, senile, decrepit, scrawny ---" the demon lord snarled.  
  
Totosai allowed him to continue for a moment, his breathing hard and ragged. He stole another quick glance at Rin again, focusing on that new mark on her throat --- and something seemed to snap inside him. "You worthless **STRAY**! You evil, selfish, no-good, grasping, stuck-up, conceited, devious, heart-less, soul-less, conniving ---" he thundered, struggling to raise the volume of his voice above the taiyoukai's!  
  
Jaken roared in outrage, while Rin's jaw dropped in absolute horror and she cast a fearful look up at Sesshoumaru-sama. Her master's mouth was set in a tight, grim line and the walls of the cavern were starting to rattle in perfect sync with his building, resonating growl. _What was happening? Ojii- sama was SO angry with her master and seeking to provoke him on purpose. But why? She could still see no real reason_ ---  
  
Rin couldn't take much more. "Sesshoumaru-sama! Please!" She raced forward to seize a fistful of his billowing sleeve, hoping to calm him before this fight escalated beyond the point of no return. "I don't think Ojji-sama means for this gift to be an insult to you!" she cried, somewhat skeptically. "Please! It's wonderful --- and I love it! It won't slow me down and --- and --- besides, I think I know the real reason that you're upset." She grasped his hands tightly, just as his eyes flashed to blood red, not caring that the other youkai present were all staring at her in stunned silence.  
  
"I swear to you now, my lord, that I won't go out looking for trouble simply because I wear this! I remember my first vow!" she gritted desperately, as she brushed his cheek tenderly with the back of her hand. "Please! Let us accept this gift and --- and let us leave. I beg you --- let's continue on our way. Rin wa mou ikitaku natta."  
  
The red haze faded and Sesshoumaru's look softened at her practical words and her pleading eyes. He was being an ass. As much as he relished the thought of getting back at Totosai, it **WAS** truly beneath his dignity. Besides, by remaining here any longer and continuing this fight, the only creature he was REALLY hurting was Rin. She was obviously enchanted with Totosai's present and --- as much as he hated to admit it, the old demon was right. He did have many enemies and if he truly cared for the girl, he SHOULD accept anything that would aid her or add to her defense. But --- the symbolism of this armor was not lost on him and tore at his already guilty conscience. _Protect her heart, huh?_ He bristled at Totosai's observations --- _the old fool WAS wrong. **Again.  
**_  
His shoulders straightened and he nodded curtly at the sword-smith. "As it clearly pleases Rin, this Sesshoumaru will accept your gift --- 'gratefully'." The taiyoukai's last words were ground out in a deep, icy hiss. "Unconventional and unnecessary as it may be."  
  
Without another backward glance, he strode quickly towards the entryway, his hand straying to the hilt of Toukijin, fully prepared to disintegrate any obstacle in his path. He would not stay in this rank, smoky hole for a moment longer.  
  
Thankfully, the demon lord found the sky crisp and clear, and he stared wistfully into the north, wondering what he would be forced to endure next. It looked like he would be pursuing his wretched half-brother again, and, misfortune and aggravation **ALWAYS** seemed to follow whenever he tread that course. _Maybe_, he reasoned, he should just quit toying with the mutt, kill him, and get it over with.  
  
"Iku zo." Sesshoumaru stated softly, as he beckoned for Rin. She offered a small wave of farewell to Totosai, and hurried to his side, still seeming to be rather shocked that he had agreed to her request.  
  
"Thank you," she whispered. "Thank you so much." He turned to her, his face conveying no emotion in response to her quiet words. Yet despite his empty expression, he leaned closer and gently assisted her into the waiting Aun's saddle. Rin's breath caught at the simple, tender gesture. The taiyoukai knew she was not accustomed to the weight of her new armor and he was --- _he was taking the time to help her?_ But, even more significantly, he was taking the time to help her in front of an audience of astonished demons, each and every one of them gaping open-mouthed at his every move.  
  
Sesshoumaru stroked Rin's thigh fondly and glanced up into her giddy, devoted hazel eyes. "We should be on our way," he murmured. "If that spineless flea is correct, we have quite a distance to cover. Inuyasha's trail should be easy enough to follow though. Unlike us, that runt has never been smart enough to exercise discretion in concealing his trail."  
  
"Us?" Rin gasped, gazing at him in wonder.  
  
But Sesshoumaru did not answer, having already turned away.

* * *

**So, what did you think? Okay, okay – I know Sess is OOC. But I guess, I wanted to make him confused in this whole transition thing too. Kind of think, he'd be a little, well, a bit unpredictable and out of sorts. Have lots of drama planned for the poor guy and I wanted to make him a bit edgy at the possibility of someone dampening Rin's adoring opinions of him. Hmmmmm, could that be foreshadowing! Really, looking forward to the mayhem in Chapter 21 – evil laughter.  
**

* * *

Daijoubu – are you alright?  
  
EIEN NI – forever  
  
Heeki – is everything alright?  
  
Irasshai – welcome! (In an warmer way! Like if an old friend were to show up on your door!)  
  
Kamawanu – I do not care  
  
Machinasai! Machinasai! – Wait! Wait!  
  
Mou hitotsu no kakera – another shard!  
  
Rin wa mou ikitaku natta – Rin wants to go.  
  
Shiriken – throwing star  
  
Tottemo utsukushikute – very beautiful  
  
Yogoreta baka na inu me – you stupid filthy dog!

* * *

**J. Akane** – thank you very much! Nice to meet you! Hope you weren't too tired at work and glad you enjoyed the story!  
  
**Flames 101** – Thanks! I'll try to keep updating quickly! Next chapter is the one I've REALLY been looking forward to, so I'll try to hurry!  
  
**Hawkgal** – whoops, sorry! I know that was evil!  
  
**Total Otaku** – hi! Thank you for that long review! Yeah, can't beat the Sess/Rin pairing --- it's just too sweet and sad! And thanks for the compliment on the Inu/Kag thing. Sess will be having to do some thinking soon about his family plan and his future with Rin!  
  
**Melinda-chan** – falls out of chair laughing! Glad you liked the fighting, it was fun to write, even though I kept loosing track of Kouga's darn kids. Maybe I shouldn't have decided to make those stupid wolves breed like bunnies! Good guess on the Shippou thing, but sorry we're going full speed ahead back to the drama!  
  
**UglyDarkFaerie** – thank you very much! 


	22. Chapter 21

I WILL MOST LIKELY COME BACK AND ADD MORE TO THIS CHAPTER WHEN I HAVE TIME --- WRITING A DOUBLE-RATED STORY IS A PAIN!!! There's nothing too adult here, keeping with the "If I've Seen It In An R-Movie I Can Post It Here, I Think?!?" Rule --- subtle innuendo and a few kisses don't cross the line, do they? I can't tell anymore.

I just wanted to get this out there before next week's manga as Sesshoumaru is poised to become the lovely Kagura's knight in shining --- fluff?! And then I'll feel too warm and fuzzy to write angst. (Just don't let him die, think happy thoughts!)

Don't sue! Once again, I don't own these characters, just borrowing them for my own petty reasons! Thanks for reading!

Oh --- and please, please! If someone saw Episode 162: Together with Sesshoumaru-sama Forever, please tell me all about the Sess/Rin goodness! (I can't believe she gets kidnapped AGAIN, can't they come up with something else?!?) I just saw some screen-caps and I'm dying to know! I mean, I can use my imagination how it ends, but Sess sure looks insanely rampaging mad (you DON'T mess with Rin! EVER! EVER!)! Guess he's trying to get out of some kind 'o holy barrier.

THANK YOU NOTOES, and JANE (I'm so sorry I had to update now, I'm about to leave on a camping trip for two weeks! I'll add your corrections when I return! Thank you both for your time!)

And THANK YOU to Resmiranda, SmartyCat and Nokomarie the Snake. I so don't deserve that!

THERE WILL BE TYPOS, BUT IF I DIDN'T POST THIS NOW, IT WOULDN'T BE UP FOR ANOTHER 2 WEEKS.

Whew – I'm done whining! On to the story ---

* * *

Chapter 21: Setsunai Tabi

* * *

Aun did not seem fond of trudging through the deep snow at all. Whenever they paused for a moment, the great beast would alternately lift his scaly feet one at a time, trying desperately to keep them out of that horrible freezing powder. Rin made sure to pay especially close attention to the creature at these times, stooping down low to pick at the ice that accumulated painfully between the webs of his sharp talons. For the dragon's sake, she hoped they would return to the sky soon, but she understood the need to trudge across this icy plain. The moment they had crossed into the wolves' territory, they HAD to cease their flight in order for her master to search out clear signs and definitive proof of Inuyasha's trail.

"Mou," Rin pouted as she studied her ice-covered surroundings. The landscape was really quite dreary --- though the tall trees had seemed lovely at first, now it was just miles and miles of the same old thing! And she hadn't seen any wildlife for ages --- not even a single chattering bird or nervous little hare! Those fat, stupid, stinking wolves probably ATE them all! she seethed inwardly.

With nothing to really focus her attention on, there was no way to combat her boredom other than replaying the disastrous events at the forge in her mind. All that awful bickering! What had gone wrong? She still couldn't figure out why everyone was mad at one another but she had the distinct impression her master was rather worried about --- about something. Almost as if he was keeping some secret to himself --- a secret that somehow had to do with her?!

Walking about twenty paces ahead of girl, Sesshoumaru came to an abrupt halt, his senses honing in on her inner turmoil. "Are you cold?" he asked evenly, without so much as turning around.

"No," she exclaimed quickly (and truthfully). Even after all the years she had spent in his care, she was still amazed by his keen instincts and intuition. She hoped he would be satisfied with her clipped reply and not press her further for answers to what was truly weighing on her mind. For some strange reason, she wanted to keep her present suspicions hidden. Some impulse deep inside told her that this mystery was something she should work out independently --- relying solely on her own judgment.

But the taiyoukai was not to be so easily deterred. "What is it then, little one?"

He was just standing there, unmoving, as the snow fell lightly all about him. It was obvious he had no intentions of continuing on his way until he had her answer. Rin felt instantly contrite for distracting his attention from the task at hand. "It's n-nothing," she stammered. "It's just that it sure would have been nice if we could have accepted Totosai's hospitality a bit more, errr --- graciously. I would have liked to show you some of the other armor I helped craft!"

"There is only one thing this Sesshoumaru regrets we were not able to partake of at the horrible place. And I plan to remedy that right now." He inclined his head slightly and Rin got a small glance at his profile, surprised to find that his lips were curved in a strange, mysterious smile.

"Come." The demon lord dramatically altered the direction of his steady march and stepped off the open trail. He headed purposefully for a thick stand of mighty, wind-sculpted pines, ducking carefully under a few of the twisted, low-hanging branches.

Rin exchanged a puzzled glance with Jaken before heaving a persistent tug on Aun's reins, causing the beast to bellow out a reluctant growl before grudgingly following them into the woods. Striving only to place her feet in Sesshoumaru's widely-spaced footprints in the hope of avoiding the deep drifts, she made her way into a dark clearing. Rin smiled at the telling shimmer of glorious steam that rose up before her, and inhaled deep breaths full of that wonderfully familiar and most welcome mineral smell.

"A sping," the young woman sighed in pure, undisguised ecstasy. She dropped Aun's lead and collapsed happily on her back in the thick powder with a loud thud. "A bath! Relaxation!" she sang out, sweeping her arms and legs in the snow to create an odd star-shaped depression.

Sesshoumaru stood back in the shadows. His expression was perfectly bland, as if he was trying to project the attitude that he would find NO pleasure at this lovely place and that this stop was merely for the benefit of his exhausted companions. But as he continued to watch Rin's playful antics, he found it harder and harder to disguise his curiosity --- why the hell was she doing that? He thought back to his childhood, suddenly recalling a time when Chichiue had brought him to a poor ningen village. He could remember how Father had tried to push him into a circle of ruddy-faced human brats as they rolled in the snow in a similar fashion. Even now, he could remember his arrogant, vehement refusal, and his deep-rooted confusion as Chichiue had explained to him that they were merely playing and that HE should join them in their 'fun'.

Sesshoumaru was snapped back to the present as Rin squealed in wicked delight, having inadvertently knocked some snow under her own collar. How the hell was this fun? he wondered, just as he had all those centuries ago. He inclined his head to the side, wrinkled his nose, and bit his lip with a long fang. Well, humans WERE a frightfully strange race, prone to irrational displays and incredibly brain-less outbursts. But still ----

Thankfully, Jaken interrupted his musings, before the demon lord was even remotely tempted to sink to his knees and finally discover what he might have been missing.

The toad was currently cursing loudly, seeming to be rather perturbed by this idyllic location and the unspoken command to set up camp HERE. "Perfect," he scowled, staring from that far too intimate looking spring to Rin and then back again. "I guess this Jaken will not be welcome here this night! And besides, I wouldn't want to stay --- I've already been subjected to one trauma already, and that was quite enough!"

Rin threw him a patronizing sneer and then turned back to regard the moon, the stars and clear, crisp night air, her thoughts in a jumble at the obvious fact that she was most likely going to share yet another bath with her master. Nothing Jaken said would spoil her night! She was really looking forward for this chance to be alone with Sesshoumaru, and desperately hoped he'd be different than that severe and demanding creature he'd been at the forge. Her anxious fretting was suddenly interrupted as something flashed oddly in one quadrant of the heavens, capturing her full attention.

"Sesshoumaru!" she gasped, gesturing wildly with both arms while staring open-mouthed into the night sky. "Sesshoumaru! What IS that?!"

The taiyoukai's impassive gaze followed the direction of her frantic pointing, a faint smile creeping to his face when he recognized what she was so excited about ---

A portion of the dark northern sky was alight with dancing color. Broad patches of ghostly green blinked between faint smudges of nearly translucent violet. Quick explosions of red flared and then vanished in a haze, sinking back to midnight black as if they had never been there at all. And, most spectacular of all, each of these bursting colors were intersected by wavy, churning channels of purest white that arced and dipped across the entire dome of the sky.

Trying to hasten his response, Rin rose to her feet and raced to her master's side. The girl stumbled a bit as she refused to take her astonished eyes from the dazzling spectacle above her, and eagerly awaited his answer.

"That Rin --- that is the Moon's Rainbow. The aurora," Sesshoumaru replied quietly, savoring her innocent, awed reaction as much as he did the display of lights above him. "I have not seen them in a very, very long time."

Rin beamed up at the demon with obvious pride. "I just KNEW you'd know!" Her mind was full of questions and she rattled them out just as soon as they formed, not caring if it seemed a bit overwhelming. "What is it really, Sesshoumaru?! I mean, what MAKES it so?! Is it a youkai?! Why do we never see this in the western skies?! And how can they move so fast? What causes the colors to change? If it's called a 'rainbow' why doesn't it stay still so I can get a good look?! And if a rainbow only comes after rain --- does this only happen after snow!? Please, tell me everything! Everything!" she clamored breathlessly, wringing her fingers on the hems of her sleeve.

Sesshoumaru marveled at her eagerness to learn and paused to throw a warning glare at Jaken, who was once again shaking his head in disgust at the young woman's seemingly boundless excitement. Under that murderous stare, the small toad blanched to a noticeably lighter shade of green and hurriedly busied himself with removing Aun's tack.

Ignoring his shaking, and now thankfully occupied, servant, the demon lord closed the distance between himself and the girl. He reached to take her small hand in his and drew her onto a large snow-bank, pausing to enjoy the strange beauty of the night sky. "What are they?" he echoed, his face still expressionless as he tried to answer her many jumbled queries one at a time. "They just ARE, my Rin. They appear in the northern sky, but very, very rarely."

The girl was staring at him, hanging on his words with avid enthrallment. Sesshoumaru reached out to capture her pointed chin with his clawed fingers, tilting her head upwards to focus her gaze on the eerie lights once more. "Are they youkai?" he whispered, trying not to grin at the rapt fascination in her hazel eyes. "No, I do not believe so. Though there are demons and spirits that personify natural wonders, like the clouds, and the thunder, and the rain --- some things just --- happen. And even I cannot fully explain how. In any case, if it IS a youkai that causes that strange glow, then this Sesshoumaru has yet to meet him." Taking advantage of Rin's naive distraction, the taiyoukai leaned down to press a lingering kiss to her temple. He felt her sharp intake of breath, and her free arm came round to encircle his waist, and ---

"If you don't mind my saying, milord," interjected Jaken, as he struggled up the snowdrift to stand behind the pair, fully oblivious to the fact that he was interrupting what could have been a potentially romantic moment. "I KNOW what causes the lights in the sky! And it's not a 'him' --- those are 'her'! Those are tennyou!"

"Tennyou?" Rin giggled, swiftly releasing the taiyoukai and dropping her arm modestly back to her side. She stared up dubiously as another shock of violet burst above some of the forbidding mountains in the distance. "Jaken-sama, I did not think YOU believed in nonsense and fairy-tales! Aren't you a little old for that?"

"Old?! And fairy tales! I tell you I've seen them!" he screeched indignantly, slamming the Nintojou into the deep snow, and raising his fist in threat.

"Are you sure you weren't drunk at the time?" Rin quipped smartly, just a little irked that her dreamy interlude was fading as quickly as some of those winking lights up above! "That was sure a lot of sake you hoarded at the shiro last time!"

Choosing not to intervene, Sesshoumaru folded his arms across his armored chest, and marveled at the girl's fearless, teasing nature, and how her biting wit never failed to catch his grouchy vassal off-guard. How could someone with such a pretty, angelic face possess such obstinate courage and sarcastic humor?

"Why you! No --- tennyou exist, you rotten little --- " Jaken's scratchy voice died as he caught Sesshoumaru's eyebrows arching to disappear under his silvery bangs, expectantly awaiting the rest of the toad's insult. The small youkai released a nervous titter of laughter and quickly amended the rest of his delivery. "You sweet-little-clever-little-darling ---" he crooned, patting the girl on the hand.

Rin, of course, was still not convinced and she quickly whirled around to face her master again. "Sesshoumaru, have you ever seen a tennyou?" Her thoughts suddenly filled with jealous images of the handsome youkai lord reclining among petal-soft clouds, surrounded by a lustful host of heavenly 'maidens' all clamoring to tend to him. She quickly amended the distasteful little daydream by imagining herself arriving on the scene to tear each and every one of the fawning creatures away by their sleek, perfectly-styled, and perfumed ebony hair. Mechanically, the girl reached up to smooth her own ever-unruly, wind-blown tresses in self-conscious embarrassment.

Sesshoumaru blinked in curiosity, wondering what the twitchy movements and the envious, violent and somewhat self-satisfied light in Rin's eyes were currently all about. "No, Rin, I have never seen a tennyou," he confirmed. She relaxed visibly, allowing him to easily (and correctly) guess what had been making her so tense. Could it be that his sweet, gentle little Rin was jealous? "No, I have never seen a tennyou --- nor do I believe they exist," he added quickly.

Rin spun in a neat pirouette and stuck her tongue out at Jaken, knowing her master could not see the undeniably childish gesture. "Ha! If Sesshoumaru-sama doesn't believe there are tennyou, then I don't believe in them either!"

With that firm declaration, the rather odd trio slipped back into stony silence, each one of them content to simply stare into the starry night sky in wonder.

* * *

Having spent so many long years traveling together, setting up camp was a fairly routine, and speedily accomplished, chore. In no time at all, a small fire was blazing cheerily in the middle of the grove, Rin had staked her claim on a rather promising looking sleeping area, and Aun had received his thorough, and much appreciated, nightly grooming. Afterwards, Jaken and the young woman relaxed, leaning cozily against the exhausted dragon's warm flank. At some unspoken signal that came from years upon years of reconciling their utterly opposing personalities (and knowing the limits of one another's patience), the irritable demon and the little human put aside their differences to enjoy a small meal of toasted goma together. As usual, Sesshoumaru wandered off from the group for a short while, seeming more interested in coolly inspecting his great swords than partaking in any further conversation.

The demon lord never strayed too far though, and even now, Rin could see his formidable silhouette through the dense screen of fragrant pines. At the moment, however, her main focus was not so much on HIM, but, surprisingly, on Jaken. The girl kept her shrewd gaze trained on the tiny imp, just waiting for him to fall into sleep. She chewed at her fingernails impatiently, watching in anxious anticipation as his head bobbed drowsily and he heaved a great, noisy yawn. After several excruciating moments, she breathed out a small sigh of relief as he curled closer to Aun and closed his yellow eyes.

And what seemed like long ages later, HER own eyes took on a devilish glow as she heard that first deep, rattling wheeze and watched the Nintojou slip from his grasp. Wanting to be absolutely certain that he was TRULY asleep before she got her hopes up, the young woman crept to his side and waved her hand crazily in front of his flat face. But the toad merely mumbled incoherently, turned on his stomach, and continued with his now deafening snores.

Humming quietly to herself, Rin picked up her naginata (after all, she would take no chances in the territory of those foul wolves!) and hurried after Sesshoumaru. She burst through the bowed, prickly branches of the pines, and into the adjoining clearing --- but --- but he wasn't in the place where she saw him last! The young woman stared down at his large tracks in the virgin snow, shaking her head at the fact that they led unmistakably, clearly and directly towards the onsen. With a delighted smile, she turned and made her way stealthily towards the springs herself, laughing to find her master already standing at the water's edge, just waiting for her. Those amazing youkai senses again! she mused inwardly. Even though HE had been at least a hundred yards away, he still must have heard the exact moment Jaken had fallen asleep!

For the second time that evening, the stoic demon lord addressed her without so much as turning, merely muttering out the sarcastic quip, "This night, it took Jaken a rather longer time than usual to begin with those appalling snores. Would you agree?"

"Un!" she concurred, stabbing her weapon down into a deep drift and reaching up absently to remove the ornate pearl combs from her hair. "It WAS a tiresome wait, but, luckily, as you know, when Jaken-sama does finally find sleep, it is rather difficult to wake him!" She shook her head slowly, quite surprised that she still had the ability to think up that silly little jibe, transfixed as she was by the alluring sight of this peaceful, hidden spring, and the shining moon above, and those impossibly bright trees with their boughs weighed down sparkling ice and --- and him.

Rin steadily unlaced the ties of her haori and eased off layer after layer of fine silk, allowing them to pool carelessly at her feet. Hugging her own shivering form, she raced into the dark waters of the onsen with a resounding splash and an even louder shriek. Sesshoumaru watched her for a few moments as she dove to the bottom of the pool, still astonished by the way everything seemed to delight her. The girl resurfaced seconds later, and his amusement faded, replaced by a more immediate emotion. The youkai leaned against a fallen tree, finding it increasingly difficult to concentrate on the task of removing as his own attire as he continued to observe his lovely companion.

Rays of moonlight glistened on her pale skin, every curve haloed in that soft light. Her fragrant hair spilled in heavy waves over her slight shoulders and her jewel-bright eyes, framed by those dark, impossibly long lashes, lit up as soon as she noticed his attention was fixed squarely on her. "Speaking of Jaken again, the little toad might actually have been correct earlier. I feel that I could be gazing upon a tennyou right now," he stated in a husky whisper, still quite confused by this myriad of strange feelings unfolding inside him.

Rin looked up at those flattering words and blushed, as unaccustomed to receiving his compliments as he seemed in offering them. "I'm not like a tennyou," she murmured with an embarrassed, self-depreciating shrug. She stood on her tip-toes and watched with rapt interest as his hands worked at the many clasps of his armor.

"You are lovely enough to be one," Sesshoumaru countered, holding her gaze as he hurriedly tugged at the stubborn ties of his white hakama next. Rin's blush grew to extend from her cheeks down to her throat, yet she laughed idly, dismissing his praise.

Catching her mischievous giggle, Sesshoumaru shook his silvery head. "That was terrible, was it not?"

The girl nodded shyly. "A bit terrible."

The taiyoukai gave an elegant snort at her humor, as he laid his fine clothes and weapons in a neat pile next to the girl's. "That was the kind of drivel my dim, imbecile half-brother would probably say to impress his equally stupid woman, was it not?"

Rin ducked her head back into the hot water again, plastering her wild hair to her scalp, and then waded steadily to meet him as he entered the hidden pool. "I'm not sure about that! You'll just have to forgive me --- I'm still not used to ANY of this! Especially those far too kind words! And besides, I would have been a terrible tennyou, for you would not have to trap me," she breathed, grabbing his wrist and tugging him closer. "I would have given up the sky willingly if it meant I could stay forever with you!" She waited for Sesshoumaru to crush her in his arms or capture her lips in a dizzying kiss or --- or show her ANY sign of affection, but he merely stiffened uncomfortably and shifted away. She watched as he moved past her, heading further into the clear water, his long, beautiful hair fanning out behind him.

Rin tried to mask her confusion. For some reason, her sweet, encouraging words did not have the effect she had hoped!

Sesshoumaru swallowed hard and glanced back up at the sparkling night sky. Some foreign sentiment was haunting his conscience --- was this --- guilt, again? He remembered the pressing conversation he needed to have with the girl and realized he had put it off long enough. Damn Totosai, he chanted over and over again in his mind. And damn HER for her selfless nature and that childlike sparkle in her hazel eyes.

He drew near to the young woman and clasped her hands gently. She seemed so small and fragile. She was just staring up at him, her heart-shaped face so doting and optimistic. Why was he suddenly afraid he was going to hurt her?

"Rin, there is something I must tell you. Something I should have told you weeks ago perhaps." Astonishingly, the taiyoukai found himself struggling with his next words. And his scrambled thoughts were only distracted further as he watched a thin rivulet of water drip down from her wet hair to wind its way along those ragged scars on her throat --- both the old, and the one that he had inflicted himself.

Rin's brow furrowed and she broke away a bit, concerned by his rather displeased demeanor. In mounting trepidation, she watched as his eyes shifted to the markings on her neck and, pained by HIS strangely mournful gaze, she found herself hurrying to reassure him. "It's perfectly alright, my lord," she soothed. "I know what you would speak to me about."

"You do?" the youkai asked, somewhat surprised and feeling greatly calmed and comforted by the serene acceptance in her expression. Of course, he had been correct all along --- she WOULD understand this easily!

But Rin's response soon dashed his momentary respite. "Yes," she answered almost offhandedly, using her tiny fingers to stir up gentle ripples on the surface of the steaming water. "You --- you're concerned that I am afraid of the wolves and that my childhood memories will distract you from the mission at hand?" She bit her lip and looked up at him hopefully.

The taiyoukai blinked in shock. "Yes," he answered, not sure what else to say.

Rin offered him a breath-taking smile of relief, touched that he seemed so worried about her. It would appear he was not only concerned for her safety, but anxious about her peace of mind as well! "Please don't trouble yourself with me!" she exclaimed lightly. "I AM a bit nervous, but I will have you and Jaken-sama beside me! I trust you to protect me --- as you always have!"

Sesshoumaru turned to hide his scowl. Perfect --- why did that statement suddenly make him feel worse? Before he could return her attention to the REAL matter weighing on his mind, she captured his hand again, turning it to place a soft, chaste kiss into his palm. The demon lord opened his mouth to speak, but closed it just as quickly as the girl began to nudge persistently (and mischievously) at his ribs, guiding him to stand perfectly still before her. Continuing to fumble over what he should possibly say next, he decided to at least comply with her not-so-subtle urgings. Why the hell was this so damn difficult?!

Rin took a moment to admire the taiyoukai's form, from the solemn, fine features of his handsome face, to the planes of his chest, and on to those long legs obscured by the shifting water. Though still very embarrassed by his compliments, at least those fiery blushes no longer stained her cheeks when she looked at him like this! She was pleased to find herself fully relaxed in his presence and she smoothed her hands over his pale skin, running them along the cords of his neck, back down to his shoulders, and on to his muscular biceps. Offering special attention to his still-healing left arm, her fingers kneaded at those weaker muscles as they contracted reflexively. She found her lips twisting into a deep frown as she noted the strange difference in the complexion of that wounded limb. The skin was nearly translucent, appearing waxy and ashen, and there was a strange crimson band running just above his elbow. And --- that stripe wasn't like one of her scars --- it was even and smooth to the touch, just like his natural markings.

It was terrible.

It wasn't that she found her master flawed --- not by any means! She just HATED to be faced with such a tangible reminder of his pain and defeat. Wisely deciding to move on before she got too worked up with resentment at Inuyasha and the still continuing sibling feud, she stepped behind Sesshoumaru and took his heavy, silken hair in her hands. Humming softly, she began to weave it into a thick, single braid to keep it out of her way.

"What are you doing, Aijin?" he asked, his tone slightly apprehensive as he tried to crane his neck to see for himself.

"Fixing your hair," she answered matter-of-factly, her attention fixed solely on her handiwork, completely ignoring his uncertain expression.

"I suppose I should at least consider myself fortunate that it is not springtime. No doubt you would attempt to torment this Sesshoumaru by trying to plait in leaves and flowers!" he retorted with a wounded pout.

Rin snickered, trying to shake what the taiyoukai would definitely find to be a most unbecoming mental image from her mind. "I wouldn't do that to you!" she retorted, her eyes filled with feigned indignation.

He raised an eyebrow in amusement. "Why are you doing that anyway? I believe you once sought to make it perfectly clear that you preferred it loose." He reached up playfully to pull a few trailing locks back out of her eager hands.

"Yes, normally that's the case --- but right now it is in the way for what I plan to do next," she responded roguishly.

Sesshoumaru tried to turn quickly, almost forgetting that Rin had a rather tight grip on the majority of his sodden hair. His eyebrows disappeared under his thick bangs in shock --- gods --- this little thing was too damn innocent to understand how bold her words seemed for just a second!

Rin watched as something stirred in the depths of his golden eyes and struggled to hide her triumphant grin. That look was most definitely an unmistakable invitation to do whatever she wished! Though her pulse doubled in response to the heat of his gaze, she merely sighed in mock-exasperation, and pushed weakly at his chest. Using her toes, the girl kicked up a few small stones from the bottom of the pool, catching the grit and rolling it in her palms to chafe at the skin of his back. The taiyoukai sighed in contentment and let his eyes drift shut, losing himself in the simple pleasure of the hot water and her gentle fingers as they continued to massage and knead at his muscles.

"Ima dou? How are YOU feeling?" he asked, suddenly struck with some selfless desire to offer her the same treatment. After all, she was the one who carried an unfamiliar new burden now! "The armor Totosai crafted --- has it been any trouble to you?" he inquired, his voice a bit strained, still unsure of how the clever little thing managed to convince him to accept that utterly outlandish and offensive gift.

"Of course not. Ojii-sama did not lie," she quipped, reaching forward to draw one teasing finger across his striped cheekbone. "It is exceptionally light. In fact, sometimes I even forget that I'm wearing it, until I have to move suddenly."

Sesshoumaru scowled once more, suddenly picturing the girl as she had been in that filthy forge --- in that awful moment when she had gleefully brandished her weapon like some would be warrior. When she had performed that classic parrying motion as if she were pretending to fight off legions of attacking demons. For a split-second THAT image shifted, and he suddenly envisioned himself standing over her broken and lifeless body, holding the Tenseiga, desperately trying to understand why the sword's power wouldn't flare. Realizing, to his horror, that he was too damn late to save her, and she was truly gone and beyond his reach ---

"That weapon of yours," the taiyoukai bit out, his mouth seeming almost too dry to form words. He focused a mistrustful, accusing eye on the naginata, still sticking haphazardly out of a snow-bank at the edge of the hot spring with the rest of their belongings. "Did the old fool instruct you on how to use it?"

"A little," Rin answered modestly. "I think Ojii-sama might have been quite the fighter in his younger days!" She couldn't help but notice the sudden snap of tension in her master's frame --- quite obviously, the subjects they presently spoke of did NOT please him at all! Hoping to relax him again, she dragged her tapered fingernails down his spine, and tried to hide her amusement as Sesshoumaru rumbled out an inhuman purr and leaned further into her feather-light touch. "I used to practice all the time --- there was really nothing else I could do at the forge once the snow began to fall."

"I should like to see a demonstration," he stated in a flat tone, breaking away from her touch reluctantly. He turned to face her once more and stared down his straight nose as if issuing some royal decree. "Totosai implied that you have some skill, but this Sesshoumaru wishes to judge for himself. Perhaps tomorrow after we make camp again."

He was most definitely NOT making a suggestion, Rin realized with a wry grin. Those words, that tone --- this was a command, and NOT one she was inclined to protest! Finally, she was being offered the opportunity to serve him in a more substantial, specialized way. He would teach her how to fight and, in time, no one would question her relationship with him! She would no longer be so hopelessly dependent and her usefulness, strength, and skill would be apparent to all --- just like Kagome-sama and the powerful taijiya! "You will teach me how to fight?" she sought to confirm in breathless anticipation. She hardly dared to believe this could be true!

Sesshoumaru took a deep breath. The girl's eyes were impossibly wide, and as much as he hated crushing her enthusiasm, he had to put forth one small correction. "NO --- but, perhaps, I will teach you how to defend yourself," he stated vaguely.

The girl smiled happily, completely undeterred by that small amendment. Whatever, she could figure out the rest! With practiced ease, she floated up onto her back. She swept out with her delicate arms, drawing herself into a deeper section of the pool as her long black hair flowed all around her. There was a small break in the pines overhead and she cooed aloud. "I can still see the Moon's Rainbow!" she called back excitedly, urging him to follow her. "How long will it stay in the sky? Why is it only in the north? Is there anything else you remember about it!?"

Sesshoumaru moved to her side again, still able to reach the bottom of the spring, though Rin was now lazily treading water. He searched his mind, trying to recall anything that he could about the aurora, just wishing to keep that innocent smile on her face for as long as possible. "Humans have many idiotic superstitions about them," he blurted without thinking. "Apparently, they foolishly believe that a child conceived under their light will be exceptionally powerful and blessed with good fortune!"

Rin looked up at him in shock, choking on the hot water as she floundered momentarily, astounded by what her master had just admitted. Humans believed what?! How would Lord Sesshoumaru know about such a silly HUMAN superstition?

Realizing his own mistake, the taiyoukai gasped in EQUAL astonishment.

But Rin was not at all ready to let that little remark slide. "Humans believe WHAT?" she exclaimed aloud, her words echoing her own clamoring thoughts. "Sesshoumaru, how would YOU know something like that?"

The demon lord looked a bit queasy and remained silent, and then the answer became amazingly obvious, hitting her with the force of a landslide or a raging typhoon. "Of course, you --- you heard it from the hanyou's mother? Sometimes, it's hard for me to imagine all the loooong years you must have seen! But you KNEW Inuyasha's kaasan, didn't you?"

Sesshoumaru paused before answering, his entire posture tense again. "Yes. Before the hanyou was born, my Great Father used to bring that low, simple-minded woman to the West. At his command, she stayed at the shiro from time to time." For just a second, his eyes glittered with a most wicked light before he continued in a dangerous whisper, "I quickly found a way to bring a halt to those little visits, but not before I was forced to endure listening some of her inane beliefs and tedious prattle. At any rate, it WAS a long, long time ago."

Rin struggled to contain her excitement. What might have occurred between her master and his Great Father and HIS human woman?! Could Sesshoumaru be persuaded to reveal more about his younger days? Though her mind was brimming with countless curious questions about the past, she quickly decided to change the mood in hopes of avoiding another scene like the one at Totosai's mountain. She did NOT want this peaceful interlude to disintegrate under his dark and bitter brooding. Paddling back to his side, she slid her hands up his chest and around his neck, loving the fact that despite the heat of spring, he still shivered as her body came into intimate contact with his own. "Kono yakei ni wa yarusenai koto wo omoidasu nante imi ga nai. It's too, too lovely for sadness here," she murmured.

At her warm words, his expression softened again, his large hand came up to cup her cheek, and his full lips touched hers for one achingly-sweet instant. Once again, he held her so tightly, cradled her SO protectively close to his heart, that Rin felt confident she had earned her place there.

"I love you --- forever," she declared softly, wondering if THIS would be the night he would offer his own response.

But Sesshoumaru merely crushed her closer, offering a deeper, more thorough, and indescribably breath-taking, kiss. Rin's lashes fluttered closed at that incredible, mind-numbing sensation, causing her to miss the troubled look paining his golden eyes.

* * *

Dawn was edging the frosty grey sky with rosy pink. Skimming over the ice-encrusted tree-tops, Shippou made his way steadily back to the southern provinces, hoping to arrive at the village within the next few hours. The trip had been disappointingly uneventful as of yet. Though he was still glad he had volunteered to take this journey and give poor Sango some peace of mind, this was --- this was SO damn boring and Kohaku definitely owed him one! The fox bit his lip with a sharp fang, certain that by now Inuyasha and others were up to their very shoulders in all manner of adventure. And, who knew --- maybe it was all over already and that scruffy half-demon had already claimed Naraku's head? And maybe --- maybe, Kagome was purifying the tainted jewel at this very moment! His quick, triumphant grin died, and he shuddered and shook his bright head, knowing it couldn't possibly be that easy --- after all these years they were still going around in circles! But --- but he had to think positive, any other possibility or outcome was just too scary to dwell upon right now, especially when he was all alone.

Not much further to travel now, he mused. Though thick clouds and the threat of snow seemed to dog at his heels for the duration of the journey, the weather HAD remained cooperative for the most part and he had arrived at the borders of Musashi several hours earlier then even he had anticipated. The damn freezing winds suddenly gusted again, as if trying to remind him not to get so over-confident and he was forced to an abrupt, screeching halt. Those winds --- this time their drafts carried the unmistakable odor of blood. The fox's sensitive nose twitched as he tried to examine the foul scent some more. No doubt about it! That was most definitely human blood! And the distinctive, thick coppery tang was made even more horrible by the fact that he could recognize the particular human it belonged to ---

Relying purely on blind demon instinct, every one of his senses focused on locating the origin of that distasteful scent, Shippou wheeled sharply from the sky, crashing down through the tangled, dead forest canopy. The rough, dry branches tore at his blue haori and snagged his long red hair painfully --- but still he kept going. That scent --- it was Kaede --- he was positive! But why the hell would she be way up here? He quickened his pace as another unmistakable odor began to assail his keen senses. There was no denying it, he could smell another creature now --- A DEMON.

The fox broke into a snowy thicket, his whirlwind pace churning up a wave of fine powdery snow in his wake. "Kitsune bi!" he cried, not even allowing his opponent a moment's warning to mount a defense. His strong powers flared at his fingertips and he hurled a wall of blinding blue flame between the wounded, shaking old miko and her youkai attacker.

It was hard to tell what the beast really was --- it was covered with roll after roll of matted brown fur and it stank something like something decayed! Shippou quickly decided that he really didn't CARE what it was --- all that mattered was that he drive it away and quickly! He shifted the flow of his fox-fire, focusing the flames at the lumbering creature while willing himself not to gag at the smell of stinking and now singed fur! And now time for the final blow, the kistsune thought smugly, transforming himself into a towering blue oni much like the one he had once seen the wicked Sesshoumaru take command of all those years ago.

The ugly demon turned away from the miko and batted at his burned snout stupidly. It stared through the column of magic fire, blinking its tiny multiple eyes at the formidable youkai now suddenly looming above; its imposing frame dwarfed even the tall trees of the clearing! The dumb brute squealed in terror and bowed submissively to this far greater creature, apparently deciding its old, dried up prey was not worth a fight with something so menacing. Without further resistance, it slunk back into the woods with a frustrated snarl.

Flashing an arrogant smirk that rivaled Inuyasha's own, Shippou allowed his illusion to fade, shrinking back to his original form even as he raced forward to cradle the injured priestess in his arms. "Kaede-sama, are you alright!?" he exclaimed, fervently hoping that she recognized him and didn't decide to use any of her purifying powers as he held her so close. He really had no wish to discover what it felt like to be sealed --- however temporary it might be before she realized her mistake! The fox gingerly held up the woman's right arm, wincing at the deep gash that ran across it. He was afraid an artery had been nicked and he stared down at the snow of the clearing, noting the many scattered stains of red, clotted blood. Wordlessly, he took the hem of his sleeve in his pointed fangs and tore a fine strip of silk free to bind the wound as the priestess moaned in pain. "What happened?!" he bellowed, when she finally focused on him with a look of dumb astonishment. "And what the hell are you doing way up here?"

Though battered and bleeding, luckily, the old woman still seemed to be somewhat lucid. "Oh, thank heavens!" she cried out in the raspy tone of one whose voice had been burned by away by fierce winter weather. "There's no time, fox-child! You must listen to me! Is Inuyasha with you!? If not --- you must find him quickly! I fear he and Kagome are in great danger!" Shippou tightened his grip in reflexive panic as he stared at the priestess in growing shock. Kaede was always so stoic and calm --- now she was hysterical, her dark eye darting wildly over the clearing, her hands clenched with involuntary tremors, and her whole solid frame shivering uncontrollably in her great fear. "What the hell, Kaede-sama? What happened?" the kitsune shouted, squeezing her fingers tightly as he desperately tried to reassure her.

But Kaede merely shook her head stubbornly and wrenched her hand free. Though nearly overwhelmed by a wracking coughing spell, she reached into her outer robe to withdraw a small strip of ghostly white fur. Shippou's eyes widened in horror. He knew what THAT was in an instant. He KNEW that terrible scent at once --- after all, it even played a part in his worst nightmares!

"Naraku!" he gasped, gazing open-mouthed at that tattered scrap of baboon pelt. His fluffy tail lashed in agitation as he frantically tried to gauge what this might mean. "Naraku was in OUR village? Kaisei!? Kohaku!? Are they even alive?!" he continued, his voice rising in volume as his own panic grew to match Kaede's. He roughly shook the priestess, causing her eyelid to flutter weakly as she struggled to keep from slipping into unconsciousness.

"Gods --- I've got to get you out of here!" Shippou hissed, scowling at the fact that the woman's blood was still seeping through his makeshift dressing. The cut was so damn deep and, judging by the filthy appearance of the youkai that attacked her, it was sure to be infected! He needed to find a healer and fast! The young demon rose quickly, his tiny paws sinking into the deep snow as he hoisted the old woman into his arms. "Damn --- you're still heavy," he muttered, trying to keep them both calm by lightning the mood with an easy jibe.

But Kaede was not to be distracted. "No!" she cried angrily, struggling to recover her strength and fighting to escape his tight grip. "Forget about me, boy! You must return to Inuyasha and Kagome! They must be told! They are in danger!"

With a loud, rumbling growl, Shippou shot back into the air, ignoring her obstinate pleas. He hunched his broad shoulders to offer the woman some protection as he hurtled back up through the canopy and fixed her with his most intimidating glare. "Don't argue with me, baabaa! Tell me what happened!" The fox nudged the injured woman gently, as he resumed his rapid southward course. "And no sleeping!" he added. "I hate your snoring!"

Kaede offered a groggy half-smile at the young youkai's obvious concern and teasing humor, and leaned gratefully into his warmth. "Anyone can tell in an instant that you were raised by Inuyasha," she murmured wistfully. "Your bark is now just as bad as his!" She sighed in defeat and began her frightening tale, trying to keep her dizzy eyes from focusing on the rapidly blurring ground below. "Two days ago, I awoke late --- mid-afternoon, you see," she whispered, her throat tight with emotion. "To my surprise, I discovered the rest of the villagers still slumbered as well. I could easily detect the presence of strong shouki about the village, and I knew in an instant we had all fallen under the influence some strong demon. I glanced outside, perceiving that the force seemed to originate and flare strongest around Inuyasha's forest. You couldn't imagine my surprise then when I discovered Kaisei propped outside the threshold of my hut, cloaked in this foul pelt. The child was terrified --- too terrified to even move or speak for several hours."

Shippou cursed under his breath, his thoughts flashing to the already over-burdened and emotionally taxed Sango and Miroku. How was the couple going to react to this dreadful news?! "How is the little one now?!" he asked quickly, almost too afraid to hear to the answer. In his anxious fear, he nearly misjudged the distance between two large boulders as he tried to leap agilely across a frozen pond.

Kaede shook her gray head sadly, pressing her hand to her stomach to quell the resulting queasiness from their near plunge. "She is still frightened and does little but wail for her mother and father! Luckily, I was able to summon Hatchi, and he took her away. But, that is not the worst of it and is not Kaisei we should be too concerned with --- she is well-cared for and safe at old Mushin's temple."

"You ARE as stubborn as an old goat!" Shippou grated, interrupting the priestess as the full weight of what she'd stated so casually registered in his mind. "YOU should have stayed with Kaisei yourself! If you were able to find Hatchi, why the hell didn't you send HIM up after us! He could have made the journey in no time!"

Kaede choked out a dry, mirthless chuckle. "Do not take that tone with me, young man! And though I am old, do not mistake me for a fool! Believe me, I thought about it. But, no offense to that old tanuki, what would he have been able to do if he ran into enemies such as these! That shouki was SO strong! The wolf prince must be wide of the mark --- AGAIN! Naraku is NOT in the north! He's HERE!"

Shippou swallowed hard. Kouga was mistaken? It could very well be possible, he mused. After all, though quick with an insult, the ookami demon wasn't the brightest creature he'd ever come across. And, not only that --- this wouldn't be the first time Naraku had deceived and outwitted them by successfully drawing their attention away while he moved in on his TRUE targets. "Kaede," the fox whispered, ducking agilely under a wide branch. "You haven't answered my question about Kohaku? Is he --- is he alright?"

The old miko sighed and stared off into the clouds looming on the northern horizon, wondering how Inuyasha was going to take all this news. "I'm not sure, child. Kohaku is gone --- vanished without a trace. I fear that he has returned to Naraku. Either that or he was slain ---"

"Don't say that!" Shippou hissed between clenched teeth, cutting off her terrible words, not even wanting to consider the grim prospect that his young friend could be dead. "When I return you to the village, I'LL know for certain. I can try to locate his scent, and I'll know his fate then! But until that moment, I DON'T want to hear about the possibility that he was killed!"

"Aye," Kaede whispered, sighing in relief as the outskirts of the village and its familiar farms came into view. "We will know soon."

* * *

Inuyasha awoke to the most delicious sensation. Kagome's clever fingers were currently trailing in a feather-light caress, moving from the base of his furry ear and winding slowly to the delicate tip. He sighed drowsily and nuzzled deeper into his soft pillows, gasping in pleasure as her other hand reached up to twine in his long hair. And judging by those exaggerated, languid strokes, he felt confident it wouldn't take much persuasion on his part to urge her to move on to a few more thrilling places. Damn --- he wouldn't have expected her to be this amazingly adventuresome when they were so far from home and in such a strange location! But then again, he HAD set up their sleeping pallet in a hidden corner of Kouga's den and if Kagome was satisfied with their level of privacy then who the hell was HE to argue!

His yawning growl melted into a throaty, appreciative purr and he leaned into his woman with a seductive smile. "You naughty kitten! Asobitee ka? Saa, yasashiku oshieteyagaru ze ---" Inuyasha murmured in a hoarse voice, his breath catching once more as she continued with her merciless tease.

The half demon reached forward blindly, seeking to wrap his willing mate in a tight embrace, his lips parting to seek her sweet mouth ---

And his eyes snapped open in rude shock at the chorus of little giggles suddenly echoing all around him. He stared up in mortified disbelief, cursing in anger at the sight of one of those damn blue-eyed wolf whelps poking at HIS head with a long twig.

The hanyou rolled onto his back with a snarl, only to find that another child --- that quiet little girl who insisted she was to marry Shippou one day --- was currently weaving his silver hair into a jumbled mess of tight little braids. And still another of those little beasts was picking his runny nose and wiping the drippy mess on HIS fire-rat haori!

"Temeraaaa --- you little brats!" he screeched.

Kicking off the soft furs, Inuyasha jumped up with an animalistic bark, sending the children scurrying in all directions, and causing the REAL Kagome to sit up with a confused moan.

Several minutes later, he sat glaring at the smoky breakfast fire, trying to forget about ALL the bothersome things that had happened since he had arrived in this awful place. Even before his sleeping pallet had been invaded by that wild troupe of monsters that Kouga called children, he hadn't gotten much sleep at all anyway! Kirara had been choking on some nasty hairball for nearly half the night, keeping him awake as each and every one of her wracking, dry coughs caused an instant shiver of revulsion to course down his spine. Stupid cats and their disgusting habits! he thought, pausing to kick at a bothersome itch behind his ear with his toes.

And whenever he DID manage to find sleep, he was plagued by outlandish nightmares --- the most horrible being an awful vision in which he had never won Kagome's heart at all! The dream had gotten steadily worse from there, for in his frantic mind, the young miko had somehow ended up as Kouga's mate instead and --- and all those filthy, disobedient wolf runts were HERS! He shuddered again, and hurried to mask his ill-mood as the others began to rise as well.

Kagome, her face freshly scrubbed and looking as bright and optimistic as ever, moved to settle beside him and gently laid her hand on his shoulder. He flashed a quick, grateful smile at that unspoken show of support. But --- but she wouldn't be able to remain next to him for long, the half-demon of mused with a grouchy sigh. As soon as any cooking aroma filled the cavern, she'd become ill and he would be spending the next hour or so holding her long, damp hair back as she lay doubled over and fighting off that strange morning sickness. Poor girl was always so tired and sick these days --- funny, he didn't remember it being like this when Sango was pregnant. No doubt about it, they would be off to a late start this morning. But then again, it seemed they were ALWAYS off to a late start these days.

At that very moment, Kouga burst into the darkened room, kicking snow from his fur-wrapped feet as he dropped a dead, gutted boar on the hearth with a loud thump and a proud grin. Sure enough, Kagome took one look at the bloody carcass and raced out into the main hall, hand clapped firmly over her mouth. As the miko darted out into the main corridor, those damn pups charged forward, pouring out of ever corner and crevice, cheering their father's success and clamoring anxiously to hear all about their great 'hero's' hunt. The wolf-prince threw the beleaguered half-demon a rather haughty look. Great, Inuyasha thought, like this yase-ookami's needs anything else to add to his already out-of-control ego. Please, please, don't let them start howling together or something! He suddenly found himself experiencing a wave a nausea that most likely rivaled Kagome's.

But any thoughts of retaliation or taking that conceited youkai down a few pegs died as Miroku and Sango stumbled sleepily into the room. "So, when do we leave? I just want to get this over with," the taijiya muttered, her groggy tone unmistakable proof she had gotten little or no sleep last night either. And judging from her husband's bright eyes and overly solicitous behavior, the real reason had little to do with Kirara's hacking.

"Believe me, we're getting out of here as soon as we can," Inuyasha grumbled, valiantly trying to keep his eyes on ALL of those screaming, laughing, jumping miniature versions of Kouga. He had no wish to fall victim to another sneak attack. He rose to his feet, pausing to fix everyone with his petulant scowl. Without another word, the half-demon slapped at the thick pelt covering the door, and ducked into the damp stone corridor. He strode down wide hallways, desperately seeking out his poor mate's scent and trying not to sneeze at that awful reek of --- DAMN, DAMN WOLVES!

* * *

Shippou paced around the Goshinboku in agitation, kicking up clouds of snow, desperate to take his anger out on --- something! Anything! He cast a dark scowl at Kaede. The stubborn old woman's wound had been cleansed and tended to, and she had insisted on accompanying him out here, even though he had ordered her to stay behind and rest. He sighed in exasperation. At least the miko had been practical enough to accept additional aid. She was now supported at each elbow by a pair of strong, sturdy village men who had volunteered to look after her and help her return to the village when they finished inspecting Inuyasha's Forest.

The kitsune turned his attention from the priestess and inhaled deeply. He fought the urge to wretch as his nostrils were flooded with the foul scent of Naraku's shouki, and he searched desperately underneath it all, trying to find any trace of the young demon slayer ---

His emerald eyes widened with deep relief. "Kohaku IS alive," he murmured with finality, as he squinted into the dense screen of trees. "Or at least he WAS alive when he was taken from this clearing."

At the fox's confident declaration, Kaede's shoulders slumped and she poked at the frozen ground with her walking staff, trying to phrase her next words as carefully as possible. She fixed Shippou with a stern, motherly look that demanded all honesty. "Kohaku was taken from this clearing or did he leave WILLINGLY, my boy?" she asked pointedly. "Do your powers give you any means of knowing the answer to that?" The priestess hated causing the usually cheerful kitsune's eyes to fill with such sadness, but she had to know. Besides, she NEEDED to prepare the demon boy for the very real possibility that his closest friend may now have become a VERY deadly enemy ---

Shippou growled in nervous anger. "I can't tell!" he exclaimed, throwing his hands in the air. "Inuyasha's better at this then I am! Kohaku's scent is here! And it definitely leads westward though I have no CLUE why he'd be headed in that direction! And as for Naraku, I could detect his scent all over the well, but not in it. So I guess that's one thing we can be thankful for!" He rubbed at his throbbing temples. "Kagome's going to --- to put it in her words --- 'freak' when she hears about that little detail!" he muttered under his breath, his shape automatically shifting to form an imitation of the young miko as his thoughts centered on her for those few seconds. At that strange sight, the two village men backed up a step, still not quite comfortable with what they collectively termed 'tricky fox magic', even after all these years. But Shippou ignored their reactions, focusing his full attention on Kaede. "You were right," he sighed. "I have to leave at once and get Inuyasha back here. And I DO have to hurry! The way the weather is now --- there soon won't be much of a trail left to follow!"

"Be quick, Shippou!" Kaede urged. "And be careful!"

"Yeah! Don't worry," the fox shouted sarcastically over his shoulder. "These days, I'm becoming a regular messenger boy!" His youki flared once more, and his form popped into a fiery orange comet, the shape much more streamlined and far quicker than that ridiculous bright pink balloon he had assumed in his youth. In the next instant, he was gone, the only sign of his presence being a few fading and whistling sparks ---

Shippou squinted his emerald eyes through the brilliant glare of his own power, and groaned at the long distance he would have to race across --- AGAIN. His thoughts strayed to his missing friend, and he puzzled over this latest mystery. West? Why the hell would Kohaku head west?

* * *

Inuyasha and his companions had finally begun this last leg of their journey in the early afternoon, starting off at a swift pace to make up for their lost time. Kouga, of course, had sought to claim an enormous, exaggerated lead --- not out of any great rush to find his enemy, but mostly just to see Inuyasha's face darken in jealous rage. A fabulous brawl was the end result of his childish teasing, though neither the wolf nor the half-demon were able to claim victory before Miroku put a quick end to the battle with a few well-placed ofuda. Both youkai, in fact, were still struggling to rearrange their long bangs, desperate to hide the angry matching scorch marks that hadn't yet faded from their foreheads.

After that unavoidable fight, the hours continued to fly by. They gave up their hurried pace, and had begun walking over these past two miles, abandoning speed in the hopes that they would ALL arrive at their mysterious destination with the strength to fight. After all, despite his eagerness to find and kill Naraku, Inuyasha would take no chances with Kagome's safety.

They were trekking single-file down a narrow trail leading to a gloomy, isolated plain and the hanyou's soft ears flicked forward repeatedly. Those small, twitching actions were not to discover any hidden menace in the terrain ahead but actually an attempt to ignore the steady drone of children's names as his miko read aloud from that cursedly huge baby book again. Well, Inuyasha mused sourly, at least it was better than this morning. After Kagome had successfully staved off her nausea, she had spent the reminder of their time at the wolf-den holding up swatches of that carpet stuff that would soon be in his child's nursery. Together with Miroku and Kouga, he had stared in confusion at those far too similarly shaded scraps of fabric, while Sango and Ayame cooed in delight. He still couldn't understand what the big deal was --- it all looked like the same damn color to him! "This is eggshell, this is fawn, this is linen, this is ecru, this is mushroom, this is beige, this is taupe," the half-demon mimicked sourly. He tried to keep his voice low and his lips from moving too much, years of fearing the shrill cry of 'osuwari' at any given moment having taught him to remain wary. He focused on the miko's words now. Damn --- she was still in the 'A's'! This WAS going to be a long, exhausting day.

And --- and --- it was all the fault of that awful, ancient yellow back-pack! Fat books with names, bits of fabric --- what the hell else was in there?! He stared down at his razor sharp claws. Maybe he should have ripped the seams out of that cursed, seemingly bottomless contraption years ago --- when she wasn't looking! Then he wouldn't have to suffer like this! It would have been easy enough to do! he thought. Just as easy to destroy, in fact, as that rattling, squeaky old bicycle! Even now, he smiled at THAT particular ruse --- smashing Kagome's bike all those years ago so she'd have to cling to HIM. Gods, he was so fucking clever it was scary!

Even though the contents of the back-pack still gave him slight cause to panic, at least he didn't really have to worry about Kouga all that much any more. Surprisingly, after their last brawl, his greatest sympathy and support was coming from that yase-ookami. Judging by way Kouga would wince each time Kagome ticked off a new potential name, it looked like the wolf-prince was reliving similar experiences with his own mate. Still a bit wary of his rival's sudden shift in behavior, Inuyasha fixed the demon with a questioning glance. To his surprise, Kouga met his eyes and offered him an understanding nod.

"This is nothing, Inukkoro! Just wait till she starts craving things!" he whispered conspiratorially, cupping his large hand over his mouth to keep his words hidden. "When my Ayame is this far along, she's unstoppable!" The demon scrunched his nose in annoyance and tried to imitate his mate's angry voice. "I want some nice fresh venison! What do you mean to say all the deer are heading further inland to escape the snow! KILL me something NOW --- I don't care how far you need to travel! I don't care that it's the middle of the night! I thought you're supposed to be fast!"

Hearing Inuyasha's small snigger, Kagome looked up in annoyance. She merely chose to fix him with a warning glare and continued on with her book, dramatically raising the volume of her voice. "Ai, Aiko, Akako, Akiko, Akina, Asa, Aneko, An-na, Ami, Aya --- ohhh, I like that one! What do you think, Inuyasha?"

The hanyou threw her a rebellious smirk. "I don't know why the hell you keep on insisting reading through the girl's names!" He leapt back over the astonished heads of Miroku, Sango and Kirara, landing easily beside Kagome to pat her belly fondly. "After all," he whispered in a gentle voice. "This IS a BOY!"

"Can you really tell?" Sango questioned, her thin eyebrows arching skeptically.

"Keh. I just KNOW!" the hanyou bit back with smug confidence, flexing his biceps. "This is ME, here! Strong, powerful man means strong powerful sons! No offense, Miroku!"

The priest merely shrugged and continued walking, not at all interested in getting drawn into another inane little argument. Oh great, he mused, knowing what was sure to follow. Here comes another one of Kagome's rants on male chauvinism, the unjust repression of females, and the-evil-patriarchal-subjugation-and-unfair-exploitation-of-women. The priest decided to begin chanting some sutras to drown out the now all too familiar lecture. But his planned recitation died at a sudden squeal from Kagome. Much to his surprise, the noise was followed by shocked yelp from Inuyasha.

"Did you feel that!?!" Kagome was hissing, pressing the hanyou's clawed hand tighter to her belly.

"Y-yeah," Inuyasha answered, golden eyes wide --- his formerly sardonic expression now one of absolute awe. "Is he --- is he kicking?!"

Everyone crowded closer to get a better look and to feel for themselves. "Wait --- what the hell? This is MY moment!" Inuyasha barked. "And that means YOU especially!" He growled at Kouga, knocking the wolf's hand away as it reached for the miko far too eagerly. It looked like the temporary truce was over.

The hanyou sunk to his knees, pressing his cheek flat to Kagome's stomach hoping to feel that small flutter again. Judging by the half-demon's goofy, ever-widening grin, it was easily apparent to all those watched that the infant WAS continuing with its rather fierce assault on its poor mother's tummy.

Without warning, Inuyasha's clawed hands shot out to clasp the miko under her knees and about the shoulders, and with one mighty leap, he whisked her further down the winding trail.

"Inuyasha?" Kagome protested breathlessly, as she stared over the hanyou's shoulder, and a few wispy tree-tops, to watch her companions shrink into the distance. "What are you doing? Where are we going?"

"Shhh," he urged. "Show some patience! I just need to talk to you."

The young woman sighed, but didn't argue any further, choosing instead to burrow closer to his form. She pressed her cheek against the warm skin exposed by that deep 'v' of his collar and listened to the drum of his hammering heart.

When Inuyasha was adequately satisfied that they were far enough away from the others, he came to a sudden stop. They had reached the crest of a barren plateau, and looked down upon the empty, desolate valley sprawling beneath them. Inuyasha carefully set Kagome on her unsteady feet, and pulled her close. Tenderly, she reached out with her cold hand, tracing the curve of his jaw as she anxiously waited to hear whatever was troubling him.

Not knowing exactly how to begin, he stammered shakily, "Kagome, I ---"

"What is it?" she murmured, pausing to push back a few wayward tendrils of hair that escaped from her thick woolen cap.

"I love you, you know that?" he blurted. At his tender words, he miko relaxed visibly.

"Of course I know that! And I love you!" She rubbed at her belly with an exaggerated flourish, and corrected her own statement with a wide smile, "WE --- love you!"

Before she could say another word, however, she found herself crushed against his body, his next words breathed against the shell of her ear. "Please listen to me. You are everything that I have --- I don't know where we're being led, and I don't know what we're about to face! But I need you to ---"

"You're not going to ask me to go HOME again?" Kagome interrupted with a furious shriek, stomping her foot in the wet snow. "We've been through this hundreds of times! I HAVE to be here now ---"

"You drive me insane!" he bellowed, a tone of panic creeping into his voice. "Can you ever just SHUT UP for two minutes? Listen, until you came along, no one made me feel like I belonged anywhere! No one accepted me for what I am! If anything ---"

Though Kagome seemed to be making an effort to remain silent and listen to him now, Inuyasha would take no chances and pressed a claw tightly against her mouth. "If anything should happen to me --- I want YOU and MY CHILD to get out of here! I don't care if you have to steal Kirara --- I don't care if you have to knock Sango off of her to do it --- and I don't care who you have to leave behind! No heroics, no more Shikon no Tama --- just get yourself back to that well!"

He removed his hand from her lips, rather surprised that she didn't have a smart-ass retort ready to fling back at him. Her face was hidden by her bangs and he turned her chin up to face him, surprised by the tears in her brown eyes. "I'll do what you ask as l-long as you make me a promise as well," she whispered haltingly.

"What kind of promise?" he asked, his nose wrinkling in his suspicion. After all, he knew her only too well ---

Kagome's thin arms were wound around his neck in the next instant, and she buried her face in his fine hair. "YOU have to promise me that you won't put me in that situation. That YOU won't do anything too dangerous!"

Tightening his own embrace, Inuyasha snarled back, "Damnit --- you know I can't do that! Keh - I'm being serious here!"

"WELL SO AM I!" Kagome shot out snippily, tugging at his sleeve for emphasis. "Don't ask me to make ridiculous promises like that! I won't leave you --- no matter what happens! And I can't leave the others --- you can't ask me to do something YOU wouldn't do yourself!" Deciding that tugging at his clothes wasn't nearly dramatic enough to get her point across to someone so damn thick-headed, she wound her trembling fingers around a lock of his hair instead and yanked --- hard! "Pay attention!" she continued, as the hanyou yelped in astonishment. "You say I'm the only person who's accepted you! Well, here's a news flash, super genius --- it wasn't very hard to do!"

Kagome stared up into those striking amber eyes, surprised to see them so full of shock and confusion. "You're great, loyal, beautiful, courageous, kind, powerful, b-brave and --- and the only one who doesn't see that is YOU! I LOVE YOU! I LOVE YOU!" she bellowed, the words echoing down across the bleak, wind-ravaged canyon.

With a playful growl, Inuyasha dragged her down to the snow. Kagome stopped her awful, ear-piercing racket the minute his lips touched hers, instinctively sliding her hands over his broad shoulders and yielding to his rough-tender kiss. At her warm acceptance, a shudder ran through him and his slid his claws into that thick ebony hair, lifting her closer.

When he finally broke away long minutes later it was only to whisper 'ai shiteru ze' --- the adoring, tender words breathed against the pale skin of her throat.

* * *

Hurriedly readjusting their clothing, they returned to the others before the hour had past, and Inuyasha scowled when he discovered the distasteful nature of THEIR current conversation! Damn --- how he still missed the days when it was just him and Kagome!

"So, what's Inukkoro's evil son-of-a-bitch brother been up to these days?" Kouga was presently inquiring of Sango, as he slapped her on the shoulder to prompt her speedy reply.

The taijiya rolled her eyes, and edged closer to the growling Kirara. The demon huntress was still not quite used to the wolf's rough and tumble nature and not particularly fond of the subject he had chosen to bring up! "Sesshoumaru!" she snorted angrily, her tone dripping with scorn. "I guess he's still up to the things he excels at --- killing, maiming, and murdering, you know, that kind of stuff!"

Kouga heaved a deep chuckle at her obvious sarcasm, but then his expression became deathly serious. "Does he still got that noisy little mouse tagging at his heels?" he muttered, struggling to appear somewhat casual.

"Why do you ask?"

Kouga squinted at the grey sky and shrugged, "Some of my kind did --- something --- to that girl long ago. Now, from time to time, I can't help but wonder if Sesshoumaru will show up at our dens one day, seeking some kind of revenge. While that cold-hearted, overgrown hound doesn't scare ME --- I worry for Ayame and the little ones. Having a family --- changes everything," he muttered sheepishly, seeming embarrassed to be admitting this depth of feeling in front of an audience. The wolf demon blushed and quickly sprang a small ways ahead of the group to drag a mighty fallen cypress tree across a deep gorge cutting across the trail.

"We understand perfectly," Miroku chimed in brightly. He ran forward to catch up with the ookami and nudged at the makeshift bridge with his staff, trying to test it's stability before his wife crossed it. "We have a child as well. And I don't know what I'd do if anything were to befall her." Sango offered the priest a grateful smile, blushing at his tender concern. Feeling distinctly more light-hearted than she had in days, she decided to offer Kouga some additional peace of mind.

"Don't worry about it so much, Kouga! Yes, as a matter a fact, Sesshoumaru does still travel with that girl," the taijiya confirmed with a gentle laugh as she raced agilely across the tree trunk. "But trust me, she's not so little anymore --- and from what we've been told, I think HE might have fallen in love with her. So who knows!? Maybe I'm wrong and his thoughts aren't TOO much on revenge these days!" Sango turned back to the others, not surprised to find that Inuyasha's white ears were pinned back to his skull at all this talk about his estranged older brother --- maybe she should find away to change the subject soon, before another fight was underway!

"Sesshoumaru took that human girl?! Sesshoumaru-the-Lord-of-the-Western-Lands-let-all-who-see-me-fall-at-my-feet-and-tremble-in-awe-of-my-great-unmatched-power took that little, tiny human girl!?" Kouga choked, collapsing to his knees and pressing his hands to his belly as he sought, rather fruitlessly, to keep from laughing. Several minutes later, he seemed to regain his composure and called out to Inuyasha, who was still glowering and straggling at the rear of their strange procession trying to enjoy just a few more moments of peace with the beautiful Kagome. "Bet you had great FUN getting back at 'aniki' with that one?!"

The hanyou's thick brows furrowed, his lips turned in an even deeper scowl and he kicked at the snow in frustration. "Actually, that stuck-up bastard managed to find some way to cheat me AGAIN. I can't even really mock him on this human thing --- for something that grew up around HIM, the girl is actually kinda likable. Gentle and sweet and kinda brave," Inuyasha admitted grudgingly. "But there must be something wrong with her mind, maybe something you guys did, 'cause I can't figure out what she sees in someone as evil and stuck-up as him!" He tossed his long mane over his shoulder and sighed in general annoyance. "Yeah --- after all those years of inferior human this and 'know your station' that --- look at what he chooses! Typical Sesshoumaru, he always manages to find a way to screw me out of enjoying ANY victory or satisfaction in my life. I hate the bastard, but damn, I have to give him credit. That bakayarou always manages to surprise me."

"Well, take some happiness in this, Inukkoro!" Kouga snarled with grim satisfaction as he rose back to his feet. "Soon ONLY me and your brother will be your enemies! We're coming up on that place now!" He gestured down to where to trail came to an obvious end, branching off into a desolate wasteland of sharp, jagged rocks that sunk down into a dark, foreboding culvert. The rime-covered granite mirrored the clouds looming in the wolf-demon's eyes. "In a few hours, we'll both have our revenge and Naraku will dead, eh?!"

* * *

Another day gone. As usual, they had broken camp at dawn and it was now nearly time to seek out a new place to settle for the night. Sesshoumaru was rather pleased with the distance they had covered, especially since he had given the order that they return to the air. His musings were interrupted by a sudden shift in the wind, and he drew up sharply, scanning the horizon with a dark scowl. Something didn't feel right --- and had it nothing to do with Inuyasha.

He had found the hanyou's scent quite easily --- not that it was really necessary. His brother's foolhardy actions left just as many clues to his whereabouts as his foul, distinctive odor. There was very nearly ALWAYS some measure of destruction following wherever that wretched half-breed roamed. Even when Inuyasha was a wide-eyed pup and Sesshoumaru had trailed him from time to time out of curiosity (secretly hoping to learn what was so special about the creature that had come to push him from his Father's favor), most everything in that half-breed's path was left in smoking ruins behind him. With a feral smile, the dog demon supposed the same could be most definitely be said for himself, but at least the slaughter and destruction that followed HIM was much more thorough, precise and exacting.

The taiyoukai stared pointedly at a track of scorched earth that extended for several hundred meters across the ground. Measure of destruction indeed, he mused --- that was no doubt the result of some wayward blast from Tetsusaiga. He inhaled deeply. Many, many, long hours ago Inuyasha had obviously skirmished here. And his opponent had been --- that --- that gravelly-voiced obnoxious wolf prince. He took another deep breath. There was no taste of blood on the air and the two demons had apparently given up their fight rather quickly to continue on their way together, making no effort to conceal their trail.

Morons --- still behaving like clueless, immature pups, he mused. Fortunately, Lord Sesshoumaru did NOT make such telling and obvious mistakes.

Which was why he was currently stopped. There was something glowing faintly in the sky ahead, but it wasn't some distortion caused by the sharp glare of sunset. This --- this was some strange force of energy that demanded his careful examination.

Rin swung Aun to her lord's side, holding the obviously distressed dragon steady as they, too, regarded that strange shimmer. "Now what?" she asked curiously. "That's not the Moon's Rainbow again? I didn't think we would be able to see it in the daylight?"

The taiyoukai's cool gaze remained trained on that distant flicker of light. "That's correct, Rin. This is something else entirely," he murmured distractedly as the bizarre wall began to pulse faintly. What the hell was that? Could it be ---

Before he could even shout out a warning, the wall had snapped forward, rushing towards them at a pace that even took him by surprise.

Everything seemed to be a blur. Dimly, from the corner of his eye, Sesshoumaru watched as Aun was engulfed. The dragon bucked and pitched violently, trying in vain to escape, his two heads snarling and hissing in their agony. The creature twisted and rolled vertically, and the taiyoukai watched in horror as Rin and Jaken spilled from his foaming back with matching screams of terror. Cursing in fury, Sesshoumaru dove after them, the roaring wind and his pounding heart drowning out nearly any other sound. Dimly, he was aware of Rin's shriek as she cried out for him once more --- but a moment later, the pain-maddened Aun rocketed upwards, filling his entire field of view. There was no time to dodge as the enraged creature spun into him ---

Everything seemed to be in slow motion for Rin, too. She was hurtling through the air; there had been just enough time to scream as she tumbled from Aun's saddle, and now she stared beseechingly up at her master as he swooped down upon her. In the next moment, she saw that dark looming shadow that could only be ---

"Aaaauuuuun!!!"

A split second later she watched as Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in shock as Aun collided with him at full, blinded speed. She heard the taiyoukai's uncharacteristic grunt of pain as the breath was knocked from his lungs and he was sent spiraling toward the frozen ground himself. The girl screamed for the third time, not knowing how badly he was injured --- but the shrill sound was cut off as she slammed into some invisible barricade. Seconds later, before she could even pause to wonder JUST how she had been saved, Jaken crashed to her side with an unpleasant crunch. Her stomach churning in utter dread, she watched as her naginata and the Nintoujou went sliding past her, carried over a crackling current of air, somehow repelled by an unseen force.

Rin yelped as she and Jaken began to skim along the strange barrier next. To her continued confusion, she suddenly realized the toad seemed much further above her, as if he were floating --- as if he were being pushed aside! What? Instead of spilling across this strange wall of light, she --- she was somehow plunging through it! SHE was slowly being sucked down, while Jaken --- and their weapons --- were blocked! She was --- she was falling again?!

The toad valiantly tried to extend a stubby arm to reach her before it was too late. "Jaken-sama, please! I can't!" she shouted, her teeth gritted. The frantic little youkai was suddenly knocked out of the way with a surprised squawk as Sesshoumaru reached her again, an angry purple bruise marring his furious face, the sleeves of his fine haori in tatters from Aun's sharp talons. His clawed hand extended, reaching wildly to grab her hands, her wrist, her robes, her long hair --- anything --- to keep her from plunging further.

"Sess ---" she choked out just as the pull intensified and she felt herself slip through that freakish, crackling wall.

Sesshoumaru stared down at the now empty air with equal parts of burning anger and numb disbelief, and then pushed off into the cloudy sky to get a wider view.

Rin was nowhere to be seen: the girl had simply vanished. He could plainly see the snowy forest floor below, but it was empty, devoid of life ---

Sesshoumaru continued to glare down at the earth, struggling to make sense of all that had occurred over these past few horrendous minutes. The naginata, Jaken, the Nintojou, Aun and EVEN himself --- all of them had been knocked back! This was clearly some form of barrier that repelled demons and --- and Rin was still human and clearly did not hold enough of HIS power to be thrown out!

And, by the very fact that she was not visible in the clearing below, the enraged youkai quickly deduced that this barrier not only repelled youki, but was obviously designed to cast some manner of illusion as well! He brought up his hand to examine the faint pink aura that still sizzled around his burnt fingers. Yes, this was most definitely a purifying barrier and, in his experience, he had only encountered TWO creatures with the power to create one so strong as this.

A steady growl rumbled through his chest and throat, and he drew Toukijin, fully prepared to blast the damn barricade apart with one blow. With a pained gasp, Sesshoumaru reluctantly lowered the sword, his cool intellect and reason overriding that most desperate action. If this were merely an illusion, Rin WAS somewhere directly below him, and any shockwave of power strong enough to break through this cursed bit of magic would no doubt also tear through her as well.

The most terrible thoughts began to form in his mind. How far did she fall? Was she conscious even? He called out to the girl again, not really expecting an answer. To his surprise, Jaken, once again perched on Aun's back and keeping a healthy distance from the still flaring barrier, took up the frantic call as well.

* * *

Rin awoke with a start. She experienced a moment's worth of numb horror at the discovery that she couldn't feel her limbs, then released a shaky chuckle, realizing she had landed flat on her belly in a deep snow-bank and was currently numb from the cold! Keeping her movements slow and controlled, she pulled herself from the icy ground, only to discover she hadn't escaped ALL injury. A throbbing burn coursed along her left leg, and she rolled down her tabi to gingerly poke her fingers at her terribly swollen ankle.

Deeming the wound to be nothing more than a bad sprain, she craned her aching neck to take in the rest of her surroundings, and quickly discovered she was in a small wooded clearing next to a rushing stream. With a rueful smile, she thanked the heavens she hadn't fallen into the cold water! The stream's current appeared quite fast, actually breaking through the ice in several places. If she had fallen only a few meters to the right, she most likely would have drowned!

Wait?! A stream?

Dizzy and disorientated though she was, the fact that she was now next to water gave her the first cause for real panic. Rin whirled again for a second look and shook her head to try to clear it. But, unfortunately, the stream remained where it was. Nani! she shrieked in her mind. While in the air with Aun, she hadn't seen any creeks or rivers below her! Was this --- an illusion?!

She spun back around a bit too hastily, groaning in her dizziness, and now tried to search the hazy sky. Sesshoumaru, Jaken and Aun --- they were all gone?! Now what? She was lost, trapped, weaponless and alone, and stuck under some manner of barrier. And if she could not see her companions, could they not see her as well? As if he could hear her desperate thoughts at that very moment, Rin almost swore she could make out the sound of her master calling for her. But that noise wasn't as comforting as she'd hoped. His deep voice was faint and oddly muted, as if he were miles upon miles away!

"Sesshoumaru-sama! Help!?" she shouted back, her voice dying to a whisper as the words echoed strangely into the wind. Stupid girl, she chided herself. Just shut up! This barrier is here for a reason. And whoever cast it is most likely still about. No sense calling out for her master like she was still a frightened child. Sesshoumaru WAS aware of her plight and she would not stay missing for long. At any moment, HE would come for her. This strange wall was nothing to the taiyoukai, especially considering the look of vehement rage she had seen in his eyes right before her final plunge. No doubt about it, Sesshoumaru-sama would save her soon. Until then she should try to help him to the best of her abilities by trying to find the outermost edge of this damn thing!

Rin absently rubbed her freezing hands together to get her circulation flowing and continued to crawl hesitantly to her feet. She cautiously paced a few steps forward, trying to will herself to ignore the pain shooting up her leg. Her progress was agonizingly slow, for she was hindered not only by her injury, but by deep snowdrifts as well. The girl tried to keep her spirits up with thoughts of her nice, warm, large bed back home and a full plate of steamed dumplings, but an eerie sense of foreboding had come over her. Something just didn't seem right, and she had the uncanny feeling that she was being watched. No sooner did that thought cross her mind then she heard the startling sound of light feminine giggle from the trees ---

Those tinkling peals of laughter died an instant later, only to be followed by a clear, even voice. "Well, that was interesting."

Rin whirled around again, not knowing exactly what to expect. That voice --- it was too damn familiar! She scanned the surrounding woods frantically, cursing her own stupidity, and wondered how long this mysterious person had been observing her. A patch of brilliant red caught her eyes immediately, the flashing color so out of place in all this white snow. She gasped in shock to find that a pale and stately woman with was staring intently back at her, as she reclined lazily on the wide limb of a twisted dead cherry tree.

Kikyou?

"Miko-sama! You!" Rin exclaimed. Of course! That wall in the sky! Just like at Mount Hakureizan! She just must have fallen through some kind of holy barrier! She stared curiously at the priestess, trying to discern if she posed any threat, but was temporarily struck dumb by the woman's classic beauty. Gods --- somehow Kikyou had never seemed more lovely! Her smooth porcelain skin was covered with a fine shimmer of ice crystals, only adding to her ethereal, ageless appearance. And her fine trailing hair seemed so soft and perfect, looking just as glossy as a raven's outstretched wings. But what drew Rin most were those cold eyes! They seemed so wise, but, at the same time, they were as dead and bleak as the landscape that surrounded them.

"Well, hello --- Rin, isn't it?" Kikyou greeted slowly, her face full of keen interest. "My, just look at you!" Her glance flashed to the brilliant sunset above, and her elegant, sculpted brow furrowed in amused suspicion. "It certainly took you QUITE a while to fall through my protective barrier, did it not?" The woman paused to examine her long fingernails causally. "Which IS rather interesting --- after all, an ordinary HUMAN should have had no trouble entering here."

Rin blanched, feeling increasingly uncomfortable with this woman's shrewd gaze and the pointed nature of her observation. She felt a cold sweat break out on her nape as she suddenly realized her secret connection with Sesshoumaru was in very real danger of being discovered and --- and by someone that HE would most definitely consider to be an enemy! "I don't know what you mean, Miko-sama," she replied squarely, trying to remain outwardly calm. The young woman brushed some melting snow from her hakama and began to back away. "But, whatever the case," she added, offering her most friendly and disarming smile. "I did not mean to disturb you and I-I will be leaving now."

Kikyou inclined her head and grinned back, though her own smile seemed absent of ANY goodwill. "What's your rush, child? After all, I AM pleasantly surprised to see you --- alive, that is. As I recall, the last time we met YOU were in a rather dire situation indeed. But it appears you managed to survive Naraku, after all!"

The miko paused for a moment, and her narrowed eyes roamed over Rin's form, scrutinizing the girl's fine new armor, rich clothing and precious jewelry. "And --- my! How things have changed for you! You ARE a far cry from the noisy little urchin with the runny nose that I rescued so long ago." Kikyou laughed smugly, as if she had just told the most wonderfully amusing joke. "Yes - all grown up ---- but still his little toy, eh? The dutiful mekake of a youkai lord?"

Rin jolted back as if slapped, and her eyes narrowed as well. She knew that word, she had heard it long, long ago, and she bristled in anger now. What? Mekake? Mistress!? Some low status whore!? Just what was this priestess implying?

"Nani?! Nante yobu na no, atashi no koto! What are you talking about?!" she grated in a violent tone. Once again, Kikyou's eyebrows arched mockingly and Rin fought to regain her composure, her palms itching to slap that condescending smile off that undead woman's all too pretty face! But she HAD to remain calm. The priestess was merely testing her --- just as Kagura had done. The young woman blinked, thoughts suddenly focusing fully on that bold, abrasive demoness. Yes, Kagura was perfect! she mused. Just try to imagine how the wind-witch would respond in THIS situation.

Rin straightened abruptly and gave a light, confident laugh of her own. "Believe what you will and say what you will about our 'relationship', Miko-sama. It makes no difference. For as we speak, Lord Sesshoumaru is searching for me. He'll be here any minute, in fact," she concluded with a self-assured nod.

"Is that so? Well then --- what would you have me do?" Kikyou replied with a sarcastic chuckle.

"What should you do?! I should think it would be obvious --- either you should leave NOW or allow ME to do so as soon as possible." Rin eyed Kikyou warily then stared down at her empty hands. She fervently hoped those confident words would be enough and wished she had been able to experience just one of the lessons in self-defense her master had promised her! But she supposed it didn't really matter that she had neither her weapon nor her additional training --- after all, the naginata wouldn't be much help against an opponent armed with a bow AND holy spiritual powers as well, she mused dryly.

But Kikyou merely scoffed at Rin's veiled threat once again. Her clever eyes were trained on the girl's more subtle reactions, shrewdly noting that unsteady stance and those increasingly frequent skyward glances. "I must say, your devotion is rather sweet, child. You STILL have every confidence in him, do you?" the miko queried blandly. "I understand only too well, you know. After all, I too used to feel the same about --- someone." Her voice trailed off into doleful silence, and for a moment she seemed lost in another time and place. As if too many memories were sweeping her back to a happier time when she had been ---

Rin's eyes widened and she backed up reflexively, as countless wraithlike, white snakes suddenly materialized in the heavy air to twine about the priestess, offering her some form of vaporous blue energy. Upon receiving their gift, Kikyou seemed to snap back to the present, smiling to the ghostly creatures in gratitude. Feeling refreshed with new power and filled with deep curiosity about her unexpected little visitor, the undead woman finally chose to leap down from her perch high in the twisting tree limbs. She stalked forward to pursue the frightened girl with the fluid grace of a hunter on the prowl.

Kikyou kept her pace purposefully slow, observing Rin's steadily retreating steps with a bitter scowl. The child's leg was plainly injured and it would be SO pitifully easy to overtake her should she really attempt to flee. "Stop jo-chan," she ordered, as she tread delicately through the soft snow. "You have no reason to fear me." The miko walked around the young woman slowly, running her slim, tapered fingers along the taunt string of her bow. "Hmmm --- somehow --- you're like me," she observed in dry amusement. "Are you not, Rin? I never perceived it before. But then again, I've never had you all to myself without 'Sesshoumaru-Otousama' hovering over your shoulder."

Rin's teeth ground together in fury and shame at what was implied in those seemingly pleasant words, and her cheeks flared till they were very nearly the same bright red color as the miko's hakama. "He is NOT my father," she responded curtly.

"No --- no, of course not." Kikyou sang back, her words far too quick and her full lips presently quirked in a sardonic pout. "Very careless choice of wording on my part --- forgive me. Onegai?"

Rin's nostrils flared and she backed up another a step as the miko advanced once more. The girl cast another fleeting glance at the sky. Gods --- where the hell was Sesshoumaru-sama? What was taking him so long? What if this woman really intended to do her harm?

Almost as if reading her mind, the miko softly murmured, "Do not run away, Rin. I am not going to hurt you. I just want to understand better. I feel you are not entirely human --- but by no means are you youkai either." A lone Shinidamachuu curled its snakelike body around her shoulder, and the miko extended a pale hand to offer the otherworldly creature an affectionate pat. "Somehow you feed on the spirit of another. Like me."

"I am NOTHING like you," Rin bit out heatedly, searching frantically for a way to escape. She desperately wanted to run, but --- but something told her not to turn her back on this powerful woman. But while she trusted her intuition in THAT respect, she decided it was time to forgo her initial impulse to remain somewhat civil and friendly. She would NO longer control her temper when it came to reining in her tongue, no matter how much trouble it caused her!

She swept her soft hair out of her face, balled her hand into a tight fist and then raised it in warning. "ANTA ---now if you won't show me the way out," she shouted. "then stop following me!" Her hazel eyes fell on the cold, winding stream as she struggled in vain to forget about Kikyou, and her maddening words, and focus on all of her survival skills. Just follow the water, she chanted over and over. Just follow the water and find the edge of the barrier! Though that fall through the holy energy had been painful, having experienced it once, she was prepared to do it again --- she NEEDED to get out of here!

But the priestess persisted in following the girl as if she hadn't spoken at all and merely continued with her former line of reasoning. "You're not like me!?" she laughed. Kikyou trailed at Rin's heels, as the determined young woman tried to keep her balance on the slippery stones at the water's edge. "How amusing! Dear-heart, don't you see? You BECOME more like me with every day that passes. With everyday you let him take you!"

"Let him TAKE me? I don't see how that's any of your concern!" Rin bit out in revulsion, completely disgusted by the personal nature and unexpected twist in this conversation. She was so shocked that she momentarily lost her footing, slipping into the cold wet slush at the water's edge.

Surprisingly, Kikyou extended a white hand to help her rise. "Not my concern! Look at you, the whore of a monster --- for how long? Since that battle or did it begin before? Or perhaps he truly is a beast and has been taking you all along?"

"Shut up! Kiesare! I said that's none of your concern!" Rin bellowed, pushing that offered hand away. Why the hell was the miko saying these awful things?! Her pride was stung by these hideous, sickening accusations. She wanted nothing more than to retaliate, but she had NO wish to mistakenly divulge that the relationship with her master was so --- so new. Or that the taiyoukai had ever grown angry with her and even sent her away in the first place! Just get up, just get up, just get up, she sang over and over within her mind. With a weak groan, the girl stumbled back to her feet and staggered a few more paces along the frozen bank.

For just a moment, she thought her harsh words had succeeded AT LAST ---

"Well, I suppose you are right and it does not matter anyway," Kikyou intoned, coming to an abrupt halt, and suddenly seeming way too obliging and cooperative. She folded her pallid hands demurely and bowed her dark head. "But one can not help but notice your belly is not fat with his 'child' --- still that IS to be expected though," she added slyly.

Rin stopped in her tracks. She had nearly made from the open clearing to the peace and safety of the dark woods. Besides the tall trees, just ahead there was tangled patch of dead yamaibara extending as far as her eyes could see. With her injured leg she couldn't really run, but she could most definitely shake the miko off her trail in those thick brambles! But --- WHAT was that? WHAT had Kikyou just said?! Why would not being pregnant 'be expected'? Part of her mind screamed at her to keep moving, to race into those twisted thorns, to disappear and just ignore this jilted woman who was only spreading malice and mischief. But --- wait, Kikyou was trying to imply that the love she had for her master was something horrible and wrong. She was suddenly full of the need to defend herself. To defend Sesshoumaru --- the man who protected her and kept her safe from ALL harm.

The young woman turned defiantly and stood her ground. "Since you won't stop your prying, I should tell you that there will be no child until his lands are completely secure. He has many enemies," she grated, putting special emphasis on the word 'enemies' as she glared at the still smiling miko. "The Lord of the Western Lands can afford to wait." Satisfied she had shut that horrible priestess up once and for all, Rin sighed heavily and took a few more weary steps toward the shelter of the trees.

"Please --- afford to wait?!" Kikyou snorted, marching to the young woman's side just as Rin began snapping loudly through the dry undergrowth. "Honestly, child, your feeble little mind is lost among the clouds! It has nothing to do with that! Did you not even consider the possibility that your 'Lord of the Western Lands' is simply not ready for young from YOU? He may claim to care for you ---" The miko's words paused as she ducked to avoid a few low hanging boughs, still weaving her way steadily through the frost-covered pines with the girl ---

"Well, in his own way of course," she continued on conversationally as she effortlessly cleared the obstacles. "That is to say as much as any foul, dark-hearted youkai beast really can. But he doesn't care for you enough to have you bear him children --- HANYOU children."

Rin's forward progress came to a sudden halt and her violent mood vanished at hearing such cutting, confusing words.

Kikyou nodded encouragingly, yet her voice continued in the same dry, bland and practical tone. "Did you honestly think Lord Sesshoumaru would spawn mixed whelps? Why --- he reviles his only brother --- his own flesh and blood! His only remaining kin! Surely, you did not think he would taint his bloodline further for you, an unremarkable HUMAN girl of NO importance! A human girl with no position, power OR respectable heritage!"

Rin took a moment to absorb those sickening words. An unremarkable girl? That wasn't how Sesshoumaru saw her, was it? She was special to him --- even Jaken-sama said so! Everyone told her that Sesshoumaru cared for her! Everyone --- except --- Sesshoumaru himself ---

"But --- but he --- loves me," she hissed, more for her own benefit than as a reply. She was staring into the forest but not really seeing anything, her thoughts suddenly filled with scattered memories of her master and the wonderful times she had shared with him.

Kikyou peeked around the small girl's shoulder as she stood stock-still. Though the child's tone had been passionate, her face was full of wounded fear and doubt. "Has Sesshoumaru ever told he loves you?" she asked pointedly, leaning against a wide tree trunk.

Rin looked absolutely horror-struck. "He LOVES me," she repeated in a fiercer tone, eyes darting back and forth in newly awoken suspicion. She was so frightened she could no longer keep up the façade of appearing calm and collected. Her every misgiving manifested itself on her color-less, stricken face and --- and she was powerless to stop it.

Kikyou reveled in this turmoil she'd created and let out a light laugh that seemed all the more ugly for its sweet tone. "Wait!" she snickered, crossing her arms in front of her chest. "HE doesn't even tell you he cares for you, does he? You are so pathetic in your devotion that Sesshoumaru doesn't even need to deceive you with sweetened words of love? I AM correct. Your face reveals everything!"

Kikyou rubbed her fingers against her temples and shook her head in deep sympathy. "Oh Rin --- you are even more like a dog than he is! Simpering, obedient, fawning and faithful even in the face of horrible abuse!"

Rin was almost at her breaking point. "You're wrong! You lie!" the young woman screeched back, her face darkening to a furious shade of crimson in her growing rage and pain. "YOU don't understand at all!" Automatically, her small hands shifted for her collar, trembling fingers reaching automatically to trace that newly healed wound at the base of her throat trying to console herself with more memories of her master. Don't think about him throwing you away, think about how tightly he'd holds you, how he looks when he smiles, how warm and tender ---

The miko's dark eyes narrowed once more at the girl's telling action and she laughed aloud again. "Oh no!" she cried. "I understand only too well! What are you reaching for there, little girl? Do you bear a scar from his mating? Did you think that he'd claimed you for all time?"

Kikyou reached up with one pale, slender hand and brushed her dark trailing hair aside, revealing a similar ragged mark on her own graceful neck. "Look, you fool --- I bear such a scar as well. And now you know it means absolutely nothing. ANY human woman bedded by a demon bears such a mark --- it's an accidental show of passion, a loss of control in the heat of the moment! Did someone tell you it meant something?"

In the fading light, Rin nodded mutely, too stunned to speak.

Kikyou shook her dark head and laughed incredulously. "You have been BADLY misinformed. Did you not even pause to think about it?" she chided in a sing-song voice. "A mark such as this would NOT even remain on a demoness! Think of their healing powers!" She flicked Rin rudely across the temple with her long, cold fingers. "That scar is not some ritualized claim --- it's just some disgusting act of dominance really! Like a filthy animal!"

Without warning, the miko's mood shifted and she pressed her hand tightly over her own throat. "Inuyasha gave me this wound --- long ago." Her eyes drifted closed, full of anguish and pain. "He was everything that was dear to me. I would have died for him --- I DID die for him." An instant later, her eyes snapped back open again, as if she just relived her betrayal and recalled her purpose.

"And for what?" Kikyou seethed, unexpectedly closing the distance between them and grabbing Rin by her shoulders. "For HIM to find happiness with a weak-willed shadow of myself?" She shook the already frightened girl, forcing her mournful hazel eyes upwards. "And remember this, Rin! At least, I can console myself with the fact that the girl Kagome reminds him of ME. But what will you endure, child? Who will replace you? A demoness with powers to defend his lands, his holdings and, yes, his heirs. A youkai woman who will be a part of his life in ways YOU can never dream of!"

Rin seemed to be gasping for air. She pushed herself free from the miko's grasp and her hand flailed out as she sought to support herself by leaning against nearby boulder. This couldn't be true!

Kikyou seemed to perceive her victory was close at hand and circled the trembling young woman, keeping her words deliberately slow. "It will start innocently enough," she drawled matter-of-factly. "HIS promises, the declarations that the 'feelings' between the two of you will never change. You will try your best to please him --- but your jealously will eat away your heart!" She stared into the distance with a sad, faraway expression. "As time goes by, he will seek you out less and less, for the bitterness and hurt in your eyes will only remind him of his own failures! And soon YOU will be nothing more than a forgotten memory. Nothing more than a pretty little nursemaid to THEIR children!"

"It can't be true!" Rin hissed, spinning around, and trying to stand up straight. She stumbled forward blindly, dragging her injured leg as she searched the miko's face for any hint of a lie.

"Little girl! I am a priestess!" Kikyou cried, seizing her by her shaking shoulders once more. "For years I was the SOLE guardian of the Shikon no Tama and in order to defend the Jewel I have learned a thing or two about the evil ways and nature of youkai!"

Unexpectedly, she drew Rin into a tight, sisterly hug, trying to console the devastated young woman. But the miko's next words were like acid on her already ravaged heart. "Try not to despair too much, little one," she crooned, stroking the girl's damp hair. "That mark may turn out to be a blessing actually. After all, youkai are so covetous in nature and Sesshoumaru's name IS renowned far and wide. If HE ever tires of you, you can at least rest assured that some other demon might willingly take you in. The strength and power of Lord of the Western Land's is legendary, and there are those who would find some status in obtaining some pretty little toy that HE once favored."

At those words there was a huge explosion of power that destroyed the wintry stillness of the glade and shook the snow from the very tree-tops. In the ensuing wave of burning heat, trees were shattered and splintered, and the melted ice rose up in a haze of steam. And through that swirling mist charged an ominous shadow --- the enraged Sesshoumaru.

Kikyou looked up in surprise and abruptly released Rin, who collapsed to the ground, too stunned and weakened to react. In a smooth motion, the miko had reached for her light bow.

"Kisama!" the taiyoukai challenged, his gaze shifting from his brother's old lover to his motionless ward. "Get away from her! I will KILL you!" His demon eyes flared scarlet in his fury and he raced towards Kikyou, his handsome features twisted with his unbridled loathing and malice. Toukijin was already in hand and his wrist snapped back one more, preparing to deliver another blow ---

But an arrow was nocked and the miko's bow was drawn in the next instant. The shaft was loosed and headed straight towards the taiyoukai, only causing him to sneer in contempt at her power and increase his pace. At the last possible second, he dodged and rolled away, reaching up to seize the weapon in mid-air and melting it in his poison grasp.

Kikyou's eyebrows arched appreciatively, clearly impressed with his skill. Recognizing the need to make her exit from this suddenly far too dangerous place, she allowed her Shinidamachuu to build about her once more to lift her into the twilight. "Just remember that I am right and you will learn, Rin," she called out below her, as she started to drift away. "You will learn that there is NOTHING so twisted and terrible as the hate that comes once true love is betrayed. Try as you might you can't stop it --- it is desperate, all encompassing. The feeling is relentless and it will grow more and more monstrous with every passing day. That hate will replace your passion and in time you will long to see this monster broken --- weak, feeble and beneath your pity."

Unable to take another word, Rin drew her knees up and curled into a tight ball, sobbing in the snow. Sesshoumaru stood frozen, absorbing the miko's cruel monologue with a look of sheer horror. He broke off his planned attack, racing to Rin's side to brace her fallen, trembling form. He inhaled deeply, searching for injuries --- but all he could smell were tears, plenty of bitter tears.

"What happened?" he urged. "Rin --- that woman --- she did not harm you?"

"Harm her?" Kikyou called back, taking him by surprise with her audaciously slow and intentionally provoking retreat. "No --- I did not hurt her at all, Lord Sesshoumaru. Unless, of course, you consider telling her the TRUTH to be 'harmful'!"

Sesshoumaru glared as the holy barrier collapsed further and the miko was carried into the distance by those writhing, soul-stealing snakes. "WHAT?!" the demon lord choked out. "What more did you say to her? What have you done?" Why the fuck was he even speaking to this walking corpse anyway?! "Zutazuta ni shiteyagaru zo! I WILL rip you to pieces!!!"

He was in the air in wild pursuit in an instant, nothing but thoughts of murder spinning through his mind. Through a fog of his own building youki he saw Kikyou make ready to fire another arrow. But this time, the taiyoukai realized, she was not aiming at HIM, but at the unmistakable forms of Aun and Jaken as they bounded into the clearing behind him. He caught the miko's look of sheer scorn as this second arrow was loosed, whistling through the sky towards his companions with deadly accuracy. There was NO way they could withstand her attack, and spitting out a muffled curse, he swiftly raced to defend them. With one final explosion of power from Toukijin, the arrow burst in a shower of pink light, causing his servants to stare up at him with hopeless adoration, all except ---

Rin.

The girl's face was still buried in her hands and she lay crumpled in the icy-sludge by the riverbank, as if oblivious to the cold. He gave up his pursuit of Kikyou, choosing to rush back to HER side instead. Sesshoumaru sunk down to his knees, seeking to gather Rin up and discover all that had had transpired before he arrived. If the miko's last words were any indication, he had a pretty good idea of all that had been said and it --- it both terrified and sickened him.

But the tighter he gripped at her, the more the intense the scent of tears became and Sesshoumaru suddenly realized Rin was shoving away from him. Her whole body was stiff, and she cowered as if she were afraid he'd hit her. He stared down in near helpless bewilderment. Suddenly, Jaken and Aun trotted to his side, the nervous pair appearing equally shaken and concerned with the girl's odd behavior. Sesshoumaru directed a growl at his servants, the sound an obvious warning to keep their distance.

The taiyoukai refused to let go and tried to turn the frightened young woman towards him. "Rin --- Aijin?! Speak to me!" he demanded. "What --- what happened?" For the first time ever, she did NOT answer him immediately and, in a panic, he seized her roughly by her slim shoulders. He drew her closer still and brushed back her hair to search her eyes.

But her slim shoulders only hunched further and she continued to try to squirm away, turning in his hold and remaining eerily silent. He watched as she drew her shaking hands to her cheeks to hastily wipe her tears away. Finally, after an agonizing wait, the young woman looked up at him and he almost could not recognize the voice that came from her throat.

"Sesshoumaru --- Rin will never be your bride?" she asked quietly. She kept her face slack, her expression calm and resigned --- for in her heart she knew the miko was right. It all made sense. She knew his answer even before she heard his words.

Sesshoumaru found he couldn't swallow. "No," he answered, his tone just as quiet and even. He saw the girl let out a slow breath and her eyes suddenly became as lifeless as they were on that fateful day he found her bloody corpse in the forest. Why didn't he tell her sooner? Before she found out like this? He'd had SO many damn chances. But it was still alright, he just needed to explain ---

Before he could form any words, however, her empty voice cut through the awkward, aching silence once more.

"And --- and Rin will never be the mother of your children?" she whispered in the same dead tone, desperately trying to keep the humiliation and heartbreak out of her voice.

"No, Rin. You will not." He watched as the girl's lashes fluttered closed, his amber eyes tracking a solitary tear as it made its way slowly down her pale cheek.

Rin continued to crouch in the frozen brash at the river's edge, trying to make sense out of all that had just happened. So this is it, she thought bitterly. She was supposed to love him, but ONLY when it was convenient. She was supposed to follow him blindly, and in times when he was bored she was there to amuse him. When he was frustrated, she was meant to boost his ego. And --- and whenever the desire struck him she was meant to spread her legs. She wrapped her hands around her stomach, sick with herself for her own gullibility.

"Rin wishes to go ---" Her words trailed off into an anguished growl as if she had only just become aware of her own timid and childish manner of speaking. The young woman shook her head fiercely. "I --- I WANT TO GO HOME! NOW! NOW!"

Though a bit dazed by her heated tone, the taiyoukai knew he simply needed to reason with her. "Rin --- you will listen to this Sesshoumaru." He shook his head sternly and held up his hands in an obvious order for her to calm herself. "It was not my intention for you to find out like this ---"

Gods --- every word felt like a knife in her gut. "Stop --- damattete," she moaned, clamping her hands firmly over her tiny ears.

Before Sesshoumaru could react to the fact that someone other than Inuyasha had just commanded him to shut his mouth, Rin finally looked up to meet his gaze. He stepped back in shock. Her beautiful eyes, he realized with a sharp stab of pain --- her beautiful eyes were no longer soft or shy, but cold and hard and accusing instead.

"My LORD, if it's all the same, I-I'd really rather not listen to you," she choked. "I-I would like to be alone."

The youkai gasped, still completely unused to her hearing her voice in such a bitter, empty tone. She sounded just like --- just like the damn miko herself! He lowered Toukijin, his hands falling limply to his sides. Without another word or so much as a backward glance, Rin spun on her heel, limped steadily towards Aun, and pulled herself onto the creature's saddle.

A myriad of emotions played through Sesshoumaru's mind. Guilt, doubt, fear, sadness, loss and then --- much to his relief, his most comforting and familiar emotion --- ANGER. What? How dare Rin just dismiss him as such? How dare she think she could order him around? He gave her everything! He gave up so much for her --- she had no right to be this way! She was --- she was supposed to pleasantly accept this --- like she pleasantly accepted everything! He had a perfectly logical, reasonable, rational, and sound explanation! Any sane demon would understand!

"JAKEN!" he barked out, not even knowing what he was beckoning his small servant for. He was just filled with the intense need to see something, anything bow to his will. But there was NO reply. Sesshoumaru turned impatiently, utterly surprised to find he was alone in the devastated and smoking clearing. He belatedly cast his eyes skyward, unable to mask his shock and confusion. Even from this distance he could clearly discern the unmistakable stunted form of his 'loyal' retainer on Aun's back, departing with the girl. And to make matters worse, Jaken currently had his stubby arms crossed in an obvious huff, and those bulbous, yellow eyes were regarding him with a look of profound disappointment and disgust as they ALL flew away. Sesshoumaru stared up in helpless, outraged betrayal. Those --- those traitors! The ungrateful, wretched, miserable TRAITORS --- his 'faithful' companions whom he had protected and overindulged had all risen up and bitten him like a nest of baby vipers! How --- how dare they!

* * *

Total Disclaimer: (Actually this could be a whole chapter in itself!)

I have a new e-mail address. I am still keeping the old one as well, but I have joined a doujinshi translating project and I needed more space in the in-box.

Regardless of what is I did in this chapter, I have to say now that as I AM a Kagura fan, I AM an extreme Kikyou fan as well (even though it doesn't seem that way in this story, I know!!). I don't like to see them bashed needlessly --- that's why I've tried to put some real motives behind their actions in this story (ie: Kikyou trying to drag Inuyasha to hell while simultaneously trying to purify the Jewel and Naraku; and with Kagura letting Rin escape!). Get your heart broken a few times and you'll realize why those two are such amazing characters! And yes, I know Kikyou and Inuyasha never did THE DEED, but it's so much more deliciously sorrowful and drama-ridden to suppose they might have. Ah, torment and doubt is good!

I've been LUSTING over the chance to write this part since I had sweet, innocent little Rin and the meanest-junkyard-dog-this-side-of-Tokyo hook-up. What can I say --- I warned you I was a fan of the angst! Sorry for the sucker punch with the bright and breezy stuff at the beginning of the chapter, and I'm sorry for jumping around (I scattered all the characters so far and wide that I hope this isn't too confusing!). My writing style is not very descriptive and I tend to picture this all like I'm reading the manga or watching the anime! And -- I apologize if this is a bit slap-sticky (is that a word?!) at times. Once again, it's my love for the silliness that sometimes creeps into the original series popping up!

And I don't claim to be a real author at all --- this is just a fun way to pass time while I wait for the series to end and I'm glad some of you guys like it! A random clue though --- this is outlined and I still know EXACTLY where we're going --- if I've mentioned something, or repeated myself, it'll come back into play with the story. Even if a few chapters go by, chances are things are going pop back up to haunt some poor, hapless character! TRUST ME!

Yeah --- and the Moon's Rainbow name thing: stole it from what Kouga calls it in Episode 83!

Vocabulary:

Ai shiteru ze – I love you (the 'ze' makes it more masculine!)

Anta – derogatory form of 'you' (feminine speech!)

Asobitee ka? Saa, yasashiku oshieteyagaru ze – "So, you want to play, huh? I'll be gentle. I'll show you what happens ---" (Frisky Inuyasha!!!)

Bakayarou – ass#$

Damattete - just shut up!

Ima dou – How is it now?

Jo-chan – little girl; honey

Kaasan – Mother

Kiesare – Get out of here!

Kisama – derogatory form of 'you' (masculine speech)

Kono yakei ni wa yarusenai koto wo omoidasu nante imi ga nai – It's meaningless to recall such unpleasant things on this night!

Mekake – lower-class mistress, common prostitute (ouch!)

Mou – noise of pouting

Nani?! Nante yobu na no, atashi no koto! – "What? What is that you're calling me?!"

Sesshoumaru-Otousama – Daddy Sesshoumaru (another ouch!)

Tayu –courtesan or concubine of a higher-class lord (forgot to include this word last time because I am an idiot!)

Temera – you guys! (not very nice, more like 'you bastards!')

Tennyou – heavenly maiden

Zutazuta ni shiteyagaru zo! – I'll tear you to pieces!

Thanks to EVERYONE who reviewed! I really love getting the feedback and hearing your opinions about the real series and your favorite characters! I wrote this all really fast so I hope it makes some sense. Warning – typos ahead!

Maven – Here, Here! Kaze no Kizu's all around again! You're right --- he's about as bad as a spoiled rich kid who didn't get the Corvette for his sweet 16 in a John Hughes movie. Sorry, bad joke. I'm tired. Thanks for cheering me up with those awesome comments on the OOC thing! YOU have Sesshoumaru down to a T! And that was NOT an over the top review, that was the truth! Go out there and get published!!!! (and thank you for reviewing 'Mine to Give' --- I haven't gotten much feedback on it so I didn't know if it was any good or not --- or if most people are still into the Kagura = evil villainess!) If you ever had the notion to set up a Sess/Rin fanfic website where no one could censor you, I'd be willing to help out! And, like I predicted, I didn't have to do the seconding thing --- someone beat me to it already!

Raina1 – Wow. Wow. Thank you for your time! That was far too kind and I'm still doing the dance of joy! Glad you like the Japanese too --- I never know if that annoys the hell out of everyone or not! (zip down to the bottom of the page, "what the hell" did Sess just say?!, zip back up!) Yep, that's what I was going for with Rin and Jaken, 2 jealous kids fighting for the spotlight --- I love the way they interact in the real series! Especially when Jaken tries to be an ultra-jerk and Rin hits him from left-field with a sweet comment and the old frog just melts!

Bloomz-baby – Hi! Glad you like the Inu/Kag stuff --- hope you enjoyed it in this chapter too! Finally decided to show some mercy to the totally deprived Inuyasha (he's been abused enough!) and get him some lovin'! (which the poor guy has missed since like Chapter 3!?)

Dalpengy – Never fear! I have not forgotten about chapter 17! I've been working to this point to make the truth especially awful (because I'm quasi-evil)! Wicked laughter rings out full-on Naraku style! And I SWEAR I won't turn her into 'Rin Warrior Princess' --- I DON'T like that either! The main thing that draws me to Rin's character is that she's just a full lovin', gentle, normal girl! She has nothing that Sess would ordinarily want --- no power, she's not a demon, etc., but he takes her under his wing and nurtures her all the same. So, I cross my heart ---no obnoxious, trilling battles cries in the feudal era, I promise! I mean, Rin might fight, but she's not gonna turn into Sango in an eye-blink!

Nema – Thank you! Hope this chapter isn't too disappointing! It's kind of depressing, I know!

Icy Discordia – Thanks, that's an awesome compliment! Believe me, that's the thing that freaks me out most: turning poor Sess into a sentimental wuss! Ayame comes into the story in Episode 83, I think?! I really like her character too --- I thought she would be awful, like most 'made-up' characters invented strictly for an anime are! She's actually quite cool --- let's see what they do with the poor 'girl's' English voice on Cartoon Network though!

Melinda-chan – Yes, I know. I have abused poor Kohaku something fierce. And things aren't going to get much better for him for quite some time! Hangs head in shame for picking on the little guy.

Rabid-Anime-Gurl – Another surprise update! I hope I didn't disappoint, and, YES, there IS another Inu/Sess confrontation looming! You're right too --- your comments about the OOC stuff really made me feel better! I was nervous about that!

AphroditeMe – I hope this chapter came out okay! If you want a certain word or phrase translated, just let me know! Lemons! I'm still thinking! They're so scary to write, especially now with everything getting banned! I have a naughty, naughty idea though ---

Mano – I know! I know! Oh where, oh where the hell has KOUGA gone!? The manga is getting just a bit too convenient and predictable (Though the Hakudoushi thing took me by surprise! Argh!) Yes, you are correct! There is angst aplenty on the horizon! Yep, I agree again --- Sess and Kagura will be picking out curtains for the shiro in the western lands or else dying for one another.

UglyDarkFaerie – Yes, writing Totosai in a fight is great fun! He's just goofy enough to get away with the craziest stuff! Some of the 'bit-part' characters in Inuyasha are so great and I wish there was more with them!

Flames101 – Yeah, I know they're disappearing day by day! I hope you were able to find alternate links to those stories you liked!

Cattico – Yes, poor Kohaku. It's not that I DON'T like his character, it's just fun to torture him. Maybe this is my subconscious rage at him for being 'paired-up' with Rin in the manga! And Poor Rin now --- I really abused her in THIS chapter, didn't I?

Total Otaku – No, THANK YOU again! Doumo Arigatou Ne! Yep, I'm still posting and will continue to do so until they decide to take down my account!


	23. Chaoter 22

**Wow --- Wicked-Oni lives!**

Sorry for the 6 month delay. I have had **NO** computer for ages now and then we had a family emergency --- needless to say, typing wasn't that high of a priority (or even possible most of the time, even if I wanted too!).

I've really wanted to write this chapter for ages and you guys are either going to like it or hate it. This story was all outlined last February, so certain very, **VERY** dead characters will be reappearing soon (hint – the amazingly wonderful Kagura!), even though it's totally anti-canon. Thank you to everyone who wrote to me and offered great advice when my computer crashed! Thanks to **Urd-chan**, **Jane** and **Notoes **for keeping me posted on what's new with the IY world in my six months of Takahashi withdrawal. If it weren't for them I wouldn't even know what was going on!

And **thanks** to **Jess H.** for always keeping my spirits up and checking in on my progress! Seriously, I was feeling pretty damn bitter after that infected e-mail got my computer, and if you didn't write to me or keep encouraging me, I would have totally scrapped this whole, stupid thing. When that person sent me that virus, I was so disgusted and jaded with the fandom universe for awhile and people like you make it all worthwhile! **This chapter's ALL yours!** Really hope I don't disappoint you!

I don't own any of these characters. This chapter is a STRONG **R**! Once again --- the more detailed version can be found on Mediaminer. org. (Though the format there will most like be messed up!) Here goes!

* * *

**Chapter 22 : Natuskashii, Atarashii Akumu (Old Dreams, New Nightmares)**

* * *

Inuyasha's nose twitched as he stared into the impenetrable blackness of a seemingly bottomless pit. "What the hell is this place?" he breathed, nudging his elbow into Kouga's ribs as the wolf demon crowded too close beside him. The stupid creature refused to move over so he shoved again, a bit more roughly this time. "Bastard," he added under his breath for emphasis.

But Kouga still didn't budge or offer any protest, his pale blue eyes glowing eerily as he too stared into the endless darkness below. "I have no clue what this place is," came his slow, gravelly reply. "I just know it doesn't feel right here. This place isn't ---" The wolf paused, scowling as he seemed to be searching his mind for the appropriate word. "It's not --- natural. There's something very powerful down there."

Inuyasha didn't answer, his attention temporarily diverted by the arrival of his very out of breath companions as they scrambled and slid down the rocky slope behind him. Together they all collapsed at his side in a heap --- Kagome, followed by Sango, and then a very sheepish-looking Miroku. He rolled his eyes in annoyance. _So much for all of them staying hidden while he and the brainless wolf investigated._ Obviously, the women had wheedled and argued until the monk had agreed to bring them closer. _Gods --- why was he even surprised anymore? When the hell had Miroku ever been able to say 'no' to a woman's pleading? And, besides that, when the hell did his companions ever listen to an order HE'D given anyway?_

The half-demon's brow furrowed in concentration, and he shifted, returning his gaze to focus on the yawning depths of the great black chasm spreading out before him. For one of the first times EVER, he suddenly found himself in full agreement with Kouga. The wolf was right and it WAS plainly obvious --- something big was happening here and hundreds of feet below him, he could definitely feel the unmistakable weight of some form of barrier. _But was it really Naraku or the Shikon no Tama?_ He gently touched Kagome's shoulder and offered her an encouraging glance, anxiously awaiting her opinion.

"I **THINK** I feel jewel shards down there," she muttered in response to his unspoken query. But her tone was odd and full of doubt, her words seeming clipped and confused. "I can't explain it," she continued, "it's --- it's weird. It's n-not like it usually is." The miko trailed off without offering further explanation, and it suddenly appeared as if her thoughts were lost elsewhere.

Inuyasha held his breath and studied the young woman for a long minute. Kagome just wasn't acting like herself these past few days. _Sure she was cold and tired and very pregnant and definitely over-exerting herself here in this frozen wasteland, and, not for the first time, he really was asking too much of her!_ But --- but he couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more to it.

His worried eyes met with Miroku's for a brief moment. The monk seemed to be examining the miko just as critically, his face full of the same apprehension. So, he mused, it looked like HE wasn't the only one who noticed the distraction in Kagome's manner and tone ---

"Don't worry, Kagome-sama," Miroku soothed, offering a knowing nod, as he crouched at the priestesses' other side. "You must be tired. And even if the jewel shards feel faint to you, I can definitely sense the presence of very strong jyaki." The monk stretched out on the ground and peered further over the ledge. "Hey, look at that!" he hissed. "There's a path over there and --- stairs!"

"Well, yase-ookami, how does it feel to possibly be right about something for a change!?" Inuyasha sneered, his golden eyes traveling in the direction Miroku had indicated. "Let's go! Hurry up!" he urged, ignoring the wolf's steadily building growl as he gathered the still preoccupied-looking Kagome into his arms. Pausing neither for a backward glance, nor waiting for Kouga to even the score with a quip of his own, he merely leapt further along the ridge to get a closer look.

* * *

Sesshoumaru stared up at the sky, utterly dumfounded --- in the hundreds of years of his long life, he had never been taken so utterly by surprise.

_The miko._

_Her words._

_Rin's halting questions, and his cold admission of a truth he perhaps should have told her long ago._

_Just how did all this happen anyway?_ he wondered. He had always prided himself on being prepared for anything, on being ready to fend off and defeat any adversary. He had not, however, anticipated crossing that undead woman's path. _And how could he have predicted her cruel interference? And what the hell?! Just what kind of interference was this anyway?!_ For years, he had defended his companions from attack --- but --- _but how did one shield them when the assault was against their minds and hearts and meant to test their very loyalty?!_

He found he was not at all ready or prepared for this sick chain of events that were unfolding all around him. And now --- now he could do nothing but stand frozen, alone in the snow, wondering how he could have miscalculated so badly. That final image of Rin standing alone in the clearing --- her face pale, her expression utterly betrayed, her shoulders slumped and broken --- clouded nearly every thought in his mind. A weighty feeling of foreboding washed over him, and he was suddenly unsure of how to keep this unsettling situation from spiraling further out of his control. The demon stared up at the darkening sky with narrowed eyes, not knowing what course of action to take. Growling quietly, he considered over his two most obvious options:

_**Alternative one.** Chase down the rapidly retreating Rin and force her to listen to his explanation. Then, after she had accepted his words and her eyes were once again filled with their soft admiration, knock Jaken from his lofty perch, and stick him face-first into a snowdrift as retribution for his rather shocking insolence. All of his uncharacteristically defiant followers would come gratefully to heel and life would continue as normal. **End of story.**_

_**Alternative two.** Hunt down that self-righteous bitch whose foul meddling and vicious words had just turned his whole perfect world upside down. Tear her to pieces for causing him these moments of humiliation and doubt. Crush her back into dust for forcing him to waver and for causing him to stand here so indecisively in the freezing cold. Kill her for trying to take away the only sweetness and joy he had ever known since ---_

Once again, a quick vision of Rin flashed before him and that same strange pain flared in his chest. Slowly, automatically, he turned in the direction she had fled. The taiyoukai took only a single step before pausing, images of the girl's devastated face suddenly fading from his mind to be replaced, rather unexpectedly, with an image of his half-brother.

_His mongrel half-brother, of course,_ he mused.

_Did this Kikyou bitch know about the happiness Inuyasha and his new woman seemed to be enjoying of late? Did the miko know that she had TRULY been replaced by another?_ His lips curved in a bitter, crooked smile. Surely he could kill the priestess easily, but not before repaying her vindictive words with some interesting information of his own.

A wicked idea began to form in his mind and suddenly, in some strange way, he found himself enjoying this unexpected new challenge. After all, no one had really dared to manipulate him since Naraku had offered that temporary arm and jewel shards in exchange for killing Inuyasha. The demon lord cast one last look at his companions, now no more than dark shadows fading on the western horizon, and he sighed. He could still reach Rin in a matter of seconds, but really --- what ---

_What on earth could he say to her now?_

His decision made, he turned around and set off in pursuit of the miko.

* * *

Inuyasha, his companions, and one rather smug-looking wolf demon now stood before a steep staircase, just staring at one another in blank indecision.

"Aho me! Moron, I told you this place was messed up!" Kouga beamed, gesturing down at the now glittering shards in his legs. "But you never listen to me." He shifted unto his heel, crossed his arms and offered a wide, haughty grin. "Don't know why that's so hard for you to do, Inukkoro!" He pointed a clawed finger at the hanyou's white ears, his toothy smirk dying a bit as Inuyasha just disregarded him. "Get it?" he prodded obnoxiously, "I mean, that it SHOULDN'T be hard for you to hear me --- you know, with those huge, ugly, fuzzy, stupid things sticking out of your fat head and all, I mean --- "

"Yes, we get it! We **ALL** know what you mean!" Sango suddenly bit out, interrupting Kouga from taking the insult any further. She turned to Inuyasha, ignoring the now obviously disappointed wolf prince and the odd, flickering light radiating from his jewel fragments in his calves. "So, now what?" she asked quietly, moving closer to the stairs and sliding Hiraikotsu off her shoulders. The demon slayer held the weapon before her, ready for any confrontation.

"I'm not sure yet," Inuyasha muttered thickly in response. Truth be told, he had actually been a bit grateful for Kouga's teasing, as the moments wasted by those childish jibes gave him a chance to adjust to this awful place. It was so bizarre. His head was spinning and his senses were reeling. He thought he smelled Naraku one minute, but in the next everything changed and the scent was completely gone. The hanyou craned his neck to stare further into the darkness of the chasm once more. _Wait a minute ---_

He was sure the stairs had been winding down in a different direction a mere moment ago but --- but now ---

They were different.

_So, it wasn't just the scents that were shifting,_ he realized with a low growl. _The whole damn place was moving._ He felt slightly dizzy and a little sick. He pulled Kagome more tightly against his frame, and raised his trailing sleeve to cover his nostrils, trying to stop the assault on his senses. Briefly, the scent of rotting meat filled the air, but then it was gone, replaced by the calming fragrance of spring meadows. That too disappeared, and soon it was the metallic bite of a thunderstorm, followed by the searing wind of the desert, and the smell of cool, damp leaves littering the forest floor --- it made no sense. "Just let me think," he whispered, shaking his head and rubbing at his temple as the others looked on anxiously.

Kouga offered a knowing shrug and merely waited as the half-demon adjusted. Watching Inuyasha, he was suddenly reminded of how he had inadvertently stumbled upon this sinister gorge and his first uncomfortable experiences with this ever-changing place. He knew exactly what the hanyou was feeling right now and, surprisingly, he felt a small welling of sympathy. Only too well, he remembered the lightheadedness, the smell of death, and --- and those damn shadows moving at the edges of his vision and those little whispered voices calling from the dark.

Several long minutes passed, and even though it looked like Inuyasha was gaining control of his senses again, he STILL just stood there, doing nothing, as if he was stuck to the damn floor. Thoroughly bored with this latest delay, the wolf simply picked up a stone and dropped it into the abyss, hand cupped over one pointy ear as he listened to it rattle and crash to the bottom.

"Nice," Inuyasha snapped with all the sarcasm he could muster, finally coming back to himself. The half-demon's own ears flattened to his skull, and his shoulders hunched at the clamor echoing up from the depths. "As usual --- you're fucking brilliant!" Rolling his eyes at Kouga's unbelievably noisy course of action, he finally released the pensive Kagome from his hold and stepped forward to prod at the uppermost stair with the tip of Tetsusaiga.

_Nothing moved._

_No mass of demons rushed up from the depths to challenge him._

_No buzzing hordes of Saimyoushou, no blasts of lethal miasma ---_

_Nothing._

Still not satisfied and most certainly not liking the way the stairs were still DEFINITELY moving in the darkness far below, he took another step forward, finally testing his full weight on that first landing.

Once again, nothing happened.

"Well, now I guess we climb down now," he muttered absently.

"Climb down --- are you insane?!" Kagome seethed, unexpectedly snapping out of her lethargic trance to stride forward and join him on the stairs. "Or have you taken one too many blows to the head?!" She punched weakly at his chest.

"And just what the hell is that supposed to mean?!" he retorted, his voice rising in pitch as he caught her hand just as she prepared to smack him again.

Kagome let out an exasperated huff. "I mean you don't stick your head into a viper's nest, you wait for it to come out! Don't you?!" She looked to her troubled companions for support. "I mean, come on, doesn't this feel a little suspicious?" The priestess suddenly swayed dizzily and nearly collapsed.

Inuyasha closed the distance between them with one quick step, cradling the girl against his shoulder again. "What is it?!" he breathed. _Of course,_ he realized, _that really had been a stupid question. If this place had such an adverse effect on him, just how the hell was Kagome taking this?!_ He pressed his palm against her forehead. She wasn't fevered, but her hair was damp and plastered to her brow, and her skin felt clammy, much warmer than usual. He shot Miroku a furious look and pointed a clawed, accusing finger back towards the trailhead. "See, this is why I wanted you guys to stay way back there!"

"It's alright," Kagome answered peevishly, fighting his hold. "I'm fine --- it's just this place, or morning sickness, or something --- whatever!" She pushed free from his arms and marched off to lean on Kirara, her lovely face seeming far too drawn and pale.

With too many days in the cold, too many days of fighting, too many days of being hungry and tired and of not being able to predict their own futures, **EVERYONE** was poised on the breaking point of their tempers ---

"Inukorro," Kouga whispered conspiratorially into the hanyou's ear, watching as the miko took in several deep, calming breaths and rubbed soothing circles on her belly. "This place is kinda weird, but it's not THAT bad --- we're fine now and the other humans look alright. But --- but Kagome looks pretty damn sick. I meant to ask you again --- just how far along is she?"

"That's none of your fucking business."

"It's been about four and a half months," Sango supplied in a low voice, stepping forward even as Inuyasha glared at her to be silent.

"Hmm --- kinda strange, my Ayame was also over feeling sick by that point and she never got that dizzy or turned so white!"

"Me too," Sango agreed, standing somewhat supportively at the wolf's side. "I was never that sick. Ever. I keep telling Inuyasha the same thing. And no, I don't know if this place has anything to do with it --- she's seems to have been getting weaker ever since ---"

"You! Shut the hell up!" the hanyou bellowed back, now pointing his clawed finger at the taijiya's reddening face.

Miroku bristled in anger, coming to stand protectively between Sango and the half-demon. "Wait a minute, Inuyasha --- you can't talk to MY wife like that!"

"Well, if I can't talk to your wife like that, would you do me a favor, houshi, and tell her to SHUT THE HELL UP for me!" Inuyasha's furious shout echoed wildly down into the darkness, causing everyone to cringe.

"Oooh, real smart. Now who's fucking brilliant?" Kouga quipped in the background, as the noise reverberated along the canyon walls. "Nice one! Calm down! Kakka surunja nee ze!"

"Stop it --- all of you! Quiet everyone!" Kagome shouted, not knowing what made her more furious: the fact that their bickering was giving away their position and distracting them from any real danger, or the fact that they were talking about her as if she weren't present at all. "Don't you guys hear that?!"

"Hear what?!" several irritated voices snapped back at her at once. "The echo?"

"No, not that! **THAT!**"

A faint cry, and then a weary shout, both in a VERY familiar voice suddenly sounded from high above them --- one repeated word of distress that ricocheted from the canyon walls, bringing an abrupt end to any further bickering.

"Machigare!!!!" the voice called out again. "Stop!!!"

A twisting shadow glided overhead in the next moment and Inuyasha looked up in alarm. He raced forward automatically, catching the exhausted Shippou as the kitsune suddenly popped out of his transformation and plunged from the sky. "What the hell, runt?!" he breathed, his gaze traveling worriedly over the younger demon's shivering form. "What the hell happened to you?!"

"Shut up, Inuyasha! Listen to me!" the fox hissed, just hoping he could deliver his news before he passed out. His face was red with exertion and his bright eyes seemed impossibly wide. "Kohaku's gone --- gone back to Naraku, I think." At those chilling words Sango raced closer, knocking Inuyasha bodily aside.

"Kaisei?" she bit out, trying to blink back her shock. She grabbed fistfuls of the fox's green haori as he sank down to the ground.

"Kaisei is fine --- just a little scared," he replied, his breath rattling. "Naraku didn't harm her --- in fact, Naraku went out of his way to make sure no harm came to her. She was found wrapped in this." Shippou reached into his sleeve and held up a tattered scrap of baboon's hide as the taijiya burst into wracking sobs.

At the sight of that all-too-familiar white fur, Miroku exploded in instant fury, throwing down his staff and racing forward to rip the pelt into shreds. "I'll kill him!" he hissed, charging straight down the strange stairway and disappearing into the darkness in a maddened rage.

The monk reappeared a mere second later, racing back up the stone steps as he seemed to remember his first and most important obligation. He quickly made his way back to Sango, bending wordlessly to help her hoist Shippou back to his shaky feet. Together, they made their way to the patiently waiting Kirara. "Where is my daughter now?" Miroku asked quietly, steadying the kitsune by his shoulder.

"Hatchi --- Mushin --- temple," Shippou grunted, hoping that was enough. He closed his eyes and leaned gratefully into Kirara's warm fur. The flames around the firecat's paws built and in the next second they were all in flight.

Kirara had only glided a few yards, when a whispered word from Sango caused her to stop, and they turned in mid-air to hover above Inuyasha and Kagome. "You don't know how sorry we are," she called down to the pair, resting her head against her husband's shoulder. "But you know we have to go." With that they wheeled around again, speeding steadily towards the south.

Inuyasha didn't answer or argue, shifting to stare longingly into the darkness before him as his friends disappeared into the sky. His mind was still in shock. _Kohaku gone? Was the boy the REAL target all along? Was this place just another damn diversion?! They couldn't have traveled all this way for nothing!_

Once again, Naraku's foul scent suddenly shifted up about him, interrupting his thoughts. Kouga had to be at least partially right --- at one time or another in the recent past, Naraku HAD been hiding here. _But where the hell could he be now? That bastard had shown up in HIS village? And if Kohaku was gone that could only mean ---_

"The well! My family!"

Kagome's sharp wail cut off his musings, destroying any final temptation to see who or what might be waiting at the bottom of the abyss.

"My mother," she continued to sob. "Ooh, Inuyasha, think of it --- Kohaku knows about the well! Think of ALL the other things he knows, too!"

The half-demon's mind filled with thoughts too horrible to dwell upon, and his arms snaked out and he grabbed the panicked girl, holding her against his thundering heart as he raced back down the trail in Kirara's wake. _Gods --- how many long miles would they have to cover tonight?!_

He slid to a stop as a tremendous cyclone of cold air suddenly tore though the icy ground before him, blocking his path. As the rush of wind and snow died down, he lowered his hand and looked up in annoyance in time to see Kouga strut calmly from the center of the whirlwind. "I don't want to hear any arguments, mutt," the wolf-prince snarled, his fists placed arrogantly on his swaggering hips. "Maybe I was wrong about Naraku --- fine. But if the fox says that son-of-a-bitch was at your village --- then I'm coming with you!"

"Damn straight you're coming with me!" Inuyasha sneered in return. "I can't chance another thing going wrong --- and if all Naraku has to do to get the entire Shikon no Tama is kick your sorry ass, then there's no way I'm letting you out of my sight!

"Yeah, hey --- fuck you!" Kouga snarled.

* * *

Sesshoumaru found he did not have to trail the fleeing priestess for very long.

The very moment Kikyou was aware he was pursuing her, the writhing Shinidamachuu faded from her side, and she unexpectedly plummeted from the skies, disappearing into a tangle of dark trees. An instant later, he landed near the spot where she had vanished, pausing at the uncomfortable sensation of another holy barrier shifting up before him.

He glared at the shimmering wall. Though this new barrier caused every primitive demon instinct within him to scream in silent warning, reason told him that this woman really had nowhere near a level of power to threaten or defeat him ---

_But still, it was an obvious trap,_ he mused.

Horrified to find himself facing another moment of weak indecision, he merely drew Toukijin and waded into the barrier to flush his prey out. Once inside, he found himself resentfully admiring the miko for setting up this simple, clever defense. Within the rippling sphere of her power, he found that her scent hung everywhere, and each breath of air he took into his lungs was laced with the heavy, suffocating smells of wet earth, bleached bones, and --- something else.

_Bitterness, betrayal and tears._

And just as it had been at Totosai's forge, these overpowering odors besieged his delicate senses, making it entirely impossible to detect his enemy's exact location. Actually, he scoffed inwardly, allowing his own power to build, the miko didn't really deserve ANY of his admiration --- she was only hiding, like a pitiful coward. And this flimsy barrier wasn't a clever defense, he corrected in his mind. It was the only defense --- the **LAST** defense --- she had left.

"Orokana musume --- you pathetic walking ghost," he challenged aloud, as he silently glided over the dry undergrowth. "You have decided not to run?" He was rapidly losing his patience with her spineless attempt to conceal herself and his slit-pupils sifted through the mottled shadows, seeking to pierce the gloom for even the barest hint of movement. "Do you think you could plead for mercy from this Sesshoumaru? You are more foolish than I ever suspected."

"And you are even more of an arrogant, egotistical ass than I EVER suspected!" came a haughty, disembodied reply. "Do you think I NEED to run from you, demon? Do you think your power REALLY frightens me?"

Sesshoumaru smiled as an arrow suddenly streaked towards his chest, and watched with mild interest as it merely splintered and shattered against a shield of his own great power. He showed no visible reaction to the attack, but his penetrating gaze traced along the path of the shot, and he subtly altered his course to move in the direction of the arrow's flight.

Without warning, he suddenly vanished, reappearing a mere second later in the only place the arrow could have flown from. He paused, refusing to blindly strike out with Toukijin --- after all, he already knew that his hidden assailant was gone. Masking his disappointment, he lowered his sword and resumed his hunt.

"Could it be that you really wish for death to claim you again?" he goaded, trying to force the woman to reveal her position again. He nudged at some tall, dry grass with the edge of his sword before continuing on, "Is that why you have heedlessly provoked this Sesshoumaru?"

"You ask if I wish for death?" came the laughing reply. "It might be preferable to living in this waking nightmare. But, no, I do not wish for it now --- there are a few tasks I must accomplish before I finally return to the earth."

Kikyou suddenly stepped out from behind the gnarled roots of a downed tree several yards to his right and the demon's over-confident smirk faded for a moment. The miko was not quite where he would have anticipated her to be. And not only that, but she had advanced much closer to him without drawing his attention than he would have thought possible. _But no matter,_ he reasoned. Now she stood unguarded and unprotected, waiting patiently in the open, just favoring him with a serene and thoroughly irritating smile.

"Here we are again, you and I --- just like all those months ago." She released a light chuckle at his threatening expression. "I am **NOT** the villain here," she stated practically, holding out her hands and infuriating him anew with her pitying expression. "This is a situation of your own making. You have no one to blame but yourself. I merely told Rin the truth."

At the mention of the girl's name, any remaining color vanished from Sesshoumaru's already pale face. "Do not speak of her," he growled, bringing up Toukijin in threat.

Kikyou shook her head sadly. "But I forget myself --- you are never to blame," she continued in a teasing voice, ignoring both the demon's demand and the steady build of dark power collecting along the blade of his sword. She continued to circle closer to the youkai as if they were old friends rather than combatants. Suddenly her lovely face twisted and she bit out, "That's why you were so cruel to HIM! You're the one who made Inuyasha the way he is!" With those unexpected words, a flash of white raced from her fist, her holy powers testing his defenses, seeking to find any weakness she could exploit ---

Sesshoumaru leapt forward, pushing back her power with very little effort "Ano yarou? Him --- your precious half-breed?! That is what this is all about?!" _This was actually becoming more amusing by the moment,_ he reflected, still trying to forget about the wounded look on Rin's face as she turned away from him. _These ridiculous humans and their insane emotions!_ "You are defending my wretched half-brother now?" he questioned incredulously. "Very peculiar --- that last time we met you were trying to kill him!"

Kikyou's tired eyes narrowed and she stumbled back a step as her spiritual energy, so easily rebounded, came crashing back all around her. "Kill Inuyasha?! Never!" she panted, spinning away to avoid a shockwave from Toukijin. She readied herself to deliver a fresh assault of her own. "Force him to see the error of his ways and return him to where he belongs --- yes!"

"And I suppose he belongs in hell?" Sesshoumaru questioned mildly, leaping into the air to avoid her pitiably slow attack. He showered her rigid form with a second blast of youki as he passed overhead, and scowled as the wave was fractured away from her body at the last possible second. "You still believe Inuyasha belongs with you, of course," he leered in contempt, landing smoothly before the base of a tall tree. "Tell me, does it pain you terribly to know that the hanyou has chosen another path?"

The miko gasped, unable to hide her despair. Upon hearing that pointed question, her defenses faltered for a moment, causing the end current of that last wave of youki to rip through her shield. The menacing heat sent up billows of steam as it melted the snow and ice at her feet, partially obscuring her reeling silhouette. Offering no mercy or moment of respite, the taiyoukai simply hurled another burst of power her way. Kikyou was thrown off-balance and knocked backward, crashing into the hard, frozen ground.

Sesshoumaru rocked back on his heels, his eyes glowing with self-indulgent pleasure at his impending and wholly anticipated triumph. Not only had he just discovered the extent of the miko's holy powers, but the stupid woman had also just confirmed where her true weakness lay and just how deep and all-encompassing it was. As usual, he had read his opponent correctly, and it was through this human's emotions that he would find the perfect way to exact the perfect vengeance. He lowered Toukijin, and strode forward, still wisely maintaining a safe distance, but quite unable to resist gloating over his downed and dazed opponent. After all, this woman deserved nothing less than the same hurt and humiliation she had unfairly heaped upon HIS Rin.

"Yes, as I was saying, Inuyasha has chosen another path. This Sesshoumaru greatly wishes to know --- have you seen your dear hanyou of late?" he inquired quietly. "Or rather, have you seen the girl who has taken your place at his side?"

The miko's eyes clouded over, and it didn't take a demon's keen vision to see how her body now trembled at his words. She recovered rather quickly though, her slender hands tightening around her bow as she struggled back to her feet. "And **'your'** Rin," she countered, leaning heavily upon her weapon, her breath starting to slow as she fought to gather the last of her strength. "Your little human doll, your plaything --- you would abandon her one day as surely as Inuyasha has abandoned me." She straightened proudly, sweeping her wet, disheveled hair from her face, and fixed him with her most defiant glare. "So, demon, do you enjoy seeing the pain in my eyes? Then remember it well --- because you will soon see it in **HER** eyes, too! **YOU **are turning that gentle girl into what I have 'become'. But that is what you excel at most of all --- killing love, destroying dreams and hopes, and changing others until even they CANNOT recognize their former selves!"

Sesshoumaru glowered at the woman, his brilliant plan disintegrating before his eyes. He tried to remind himself that it was always like this whenever he took a life. There was always the pleading, the cajoling, the empty threats. But somehow, something about these words caused him to pause. _Maybe --- maybe because somewhere inside, he knew they might be too close to the truth. What if this miko was right? Could his Rin's heart ever be as empty as this woman's?_

He raised Toukijin one last time, just wanting to get this all over with ---

"Of course you'll destroy Rin! Just look what you did to Inuyasha! Yes, I know **ALL** the things you did to Inuyasha!" Kikyou screamed furiously, her eyes trained on the demon's wavering sword, her hands coming up to defend herself. "I know how you ruined his mother's noble house! How you forced her line from your lands when your Father died! Not only did you deny Inuyasha and his mother your protection, but you took away or frightened off any other kin who might have offered them sanctuary! You burned their villages, poisoned their rivers and fields, killed their soldiers, and slaughtered their stock and game! Bad enough you didn't take responsibility for your own brother --- but to take away everything else that might have been dear to him! To murder anyone else who might have protected him! Forcing his mother to beg from other houses --- a tainted woman, a low class mekake pleading for the charity of others! What a proud tale, the great Sesshoumaru --- just a pompous, spoiled brat waging war on a broken human woman and half-breed child ---"

"**Silence.** You know nothing," the dog-demon answered coldly. "Damatte ni shiro. Samonai to, kono Sesshoumaru ga kono tsume de kisama no seinaru kuchi kara ano amai shita wo kirisakeru zo! Still your tongue or I'll rip you to shreds where you stand." He brought down Toukijin and the resulting blast of youki exploded through the miko's barrier with devastating effects. She screamed in pain as blue flames erupted all about her, and pitched forward to collapse on all fours. He charged her then, moving in to deliver the killing blow. To his surprise, however, his great weapon bounced harmlessly away, deflected by a pink light that surged from and encircled her chest at the last possible second.

But he knew it was over.

This Kikyou was dying --- even though she alone seemed oblivious to that fact. Those damn demon snakes that served her were gone and in this frozen wilderness she had no chance of refreshing herself with new souls.

Yet still she rose once more to fire her bow at him, and he snarled in choked anger as one arrow finally managed to graze his shoulder.

Kikyou watched as the taiyoukai prodded at his wound, his look of arrogant disbelief somehow making her own pain seem more bearable. She slumped down into the snow and quickly counted her remaining arrows, fully prepared to fire until each one was spent. Sesshoumaru, she noted sourly, did not appear to be affected by them at all, but only seemed to grow swifter and more graceful with each attack. She was running out of time.

Her attention was suddenly drawn to a long tear in the sleeve of his haori. Even in the wavering light, she could see that the skin beneath had an opaline shine and was cut by a straight red band that sliced clear across his muscular arm.

_His old wound. Of course._

She suddenly knew what was needed to defeat him and realized that she would only have one chance. The priestess closed her eyes and swallowed noisily, trying to ignore the similarities between this heartless creature and his younger brother, trying not to watch the way all that lovely silver hair shone against the sunset. Trying to avoid looking directly at those golden eyes, should her nerve disappear and she forget herself and not have the strength of will to fire.

At the next instant, Sesshoumaru charged again. Kikyou saw the boredom in his haughty face, and she dimly realized this would be his last attack. With a fluid motion, she raised her bow over her head, smiling as the weapon began to pulse with a faint light that beat in time with her racing heart. Searching within and gathering the last reserves of her power, she staggered a few steps to meet his charge, swinging her bow in a downward arc.

If not for the sudden surge in energy building all around him, Sesshoumaru would have laughed at her attempt to use so pitiful a weapon to ward off Toukijin. But somehow, the seemingly fragile bow caught the edge of his blade, knocking it away from his hand and sending it spinning into the darkness. Though embarrassingly robbed of the sword by a weak, dying priestess, he merely smiled. He had other means by which to kill a woman.

Kikyou saw the taiyoukai flex his poison talons and caught the reflected glint of dying sunlight upon them. They flashed for the barest second, their edges rippled and sharp, and then they dragged over her chest. Sesshoumaru's blinding momentum continued to carry him well past her, but she could no longer watch his progress. She could do nothing, in fact, but stare down at her own body in morbid fascination as a hazy glow seeped from a five-tracked wound extending from her shoulder to her belly. As it had been nearly sixty years ago, the wound was inflicted far too quickly for there to be much pain. Now there was just dust, and the strange resistance and unpleasant cracking of her false clay flesh.

She continued to gape open-mouthed as a steady stream of gathered souls began to run from the gash in her chest, and only now did she realize she how near she was to death. But --- but --- she needed to get Sesshoumaru close again.

_Closer. It was the only way to save herself._

"You pursued me --- when you should have been chasing Rin," Kikyou wheezed, struggling back to her feet.

Sesshoumaru turned around and blinked in disbelief and annoyance. "Your grief for the hanyou has truly driven you mad," he breathed, amazed that she could still stand, let alone form words.

"Tell me, Sesshoumaru, would it really be so humiliating to father a hanyou? Is it all half-breeds you hate or just the one you've **NEVER** been able to defeat? The hanyou who carries the precious Tetsusaiga, the hanyou who maimed you --- Inu no Taisho's favorite son born of the woman he GAVE his life for! Your Father's favorite child who's succeeded everywhere you've failed, despite all you've done to stop him, to break him, to ruin him --- " Her words were cut off, for as she had hoped, Sesshoumaru was hurtling back towards her, his face twisted in madness and rage. He was racing low along the ground, his claws extended, aiming for the juncture of her throat and shoulders. But instead of tearing into her again, he seized her by the neck, lifting her into the air to fix her with a hate-filled, murderous gaze.

Kikyou's face flushed and sweat beaded her brow as she gasped to take in a breath, forcing herself to remain outwardly calm. "Y-you mindless animal! Filthy dog!" she rasped, hands dangling limping at her sides. "Think hard before you kill me! You w-will ALL need my help to defeat Naraku!"

"You think **I** need your 'strength' to defeat Naraku?" Sesshoumaru questioned blandly, wondering just how much he would need to tighten his grip before this clay body splintered into nothing more than fine powder and a few mismatched shards.

"Well, my lord," she choked in sarcastic reply. "N-naraku **IS** another half-demon --- and --- as we all know, y-you seem to have trouble with them!"

With a snarl of outrage, the taiyoukai pinned the helpless woman against the trunk of a tree, grinding her into the rough bark. "My feeble brother who you 'love' so well might have needed your strength --- once," he hissed. "But do you think this Sesshoumaru has ANY such weakness?"

"No, my lord, you do not have one w-weakness," Kikyou answered with a gurgling laugh. "You have THREE, and you have s-shown them all to me n-now."

"Three weakness? You honestly believe so?" he sneered, slackening his grip, furious at her bold assumptions. He had wasted enough time and energy on this bitch. He drew back one hand and allowed his poison to drip from his fingertips, watching as the miko's eyes seemed to widen in horror.

"Three weaknesses," Kikyou stammered hurriedly, her gaze fixed on his claws as a vaporous green glow began to build around them. "The f-first is thinking you have no weakness, the second is the your sweet girl, your Rin ---"

"And the third?" he interrupted impatiently, seeking to be done with this, only wishing to send her back to hell.

"T-this is the third!" the miko gritted. Instead of trying to pry his iron fist from her throat, her hands shot out to clamp about his wrist --- _his left wrist_ --- he realized belatedly. But it was too late, her cold fingers were already digging into his skin and a wave of holy purifying power was coursing into his body.

Sesshoumaru swung his free arm, aiming to strike the woman's mocking mouth, but she ducked and with a similar movement reached out to him again, her greedy hands scratching and scrabbling up his still healing left arm. He felt her power gather again, but had no time to react before a second current of raw purifying energy rushed through his veins. In the next instant, his knees had buckled from the shock; the miko collapsed with him and they continued their struggle in the snow.

Kikyou relinquished her grip with one hand, her fingers searching frantically through her quiver, trying to draw her last arrow. The minute her fist closed about the shaft, she twisted in the demon's grip. She turned to plunge the weapon weakly into his skin, the bright stripes on his forearm presenting her with a target that was difficult to miss. Sesshoumaru hissed in rage and tore at her wildly, but she knew she could not let go. She had to hang on for just a few more moments if she had any wish to come out of this battle alive. "Do not fear, my lord," she crooned, a bit terrified at how her power was already transforming him. His face, just a few inches from her own, was shifting, those marks on his cheeks were growing and splitting apart; in fact, she realized numbly, it looked like his whole body might split apart, too. "I will not seal you as I did Inuyasha," she whispered, more to herself than to the snarling creature that was fighting to break free of her hold.

At her words, the demon released a cruel laugh, and turned his face upwards, his eyes crimson and his mouth full of far too many jagged teeth. "You could **NOT** seal this Sesshoumaru if your life depended on it," he thundered in an echoing, unrecognizable, and wholly inhuman voice. "Which in fact, it does."

Kikyou scrambled a few quick steps back, years of experience in slaying demons preparing her to expect the worst at this point. Sesshoumaru seemed to be growing taller before her, his talons were lengthening, and his imposing form was encircled by a rippling red glow. She steeled herself for the inevitability of death. But suddenly the frightening changes in the youkai's appearance dissolved and he was back to his customary form, cursing and writhing on the ground in pain. Desperately afraid he would start to revert back to that truest manifestation at any second, Kikyou sent a third wave of purifying power towards him. The flaring energy struck the wounded demon even as he struggled to recover from the first assaults.

Sesshoumaru could simply not believe what was happening. _He had been tested against this manner of power before ---_ _hell, he had been tested against far greater powers_ _--- but never so directly against such newly healed flesh!_ At the moment, he could do nothing but tear off what was left of the billowing sleeve of his haori, shredding his own white skin with his claws in his haste, anxious to see the damage the miko's powers were causing.

Kikyou crept closer to his convulsing form, fully prepared to flee should he make any attempt to rise. His chest was heaving, and he seemed to be in shock, but it was clear his mind was still sharp --- for there, in his dazed expression, she could still see the bewilderment and embarrassed male pride.

Confident Sesshoumaru would not be foolish enough to move --- at least for a few minutes anyway --- she inched closer to him and forced his chin up with her bow. She gazed into that perfect face, and could not help admiring the deep gold of his eyes, and their fierce, hate-filled glitter. For a moment, she was reminded of another pair of eyes. She smiled ruefully, and supposed she should get used to seeing such malice held within them. _No doubt that same cold revulsion would rest in Inuyasha's eyes as well when next they faced one another._

Through the agony of fighting back the purification spell and the haze of his strangely wandering thoughts, Sesshoumaru caught her appraising stare. "Of course, Inuyasha has chosen another woman," he panted in revulsion. "Even that weak, simple-minded Kagome is better than an empty vessel like you. You --- you would not even be able to summon a tear to weep for him with that false body."

"Nor can I summon any tears for to weep for you my lord," Kikyou stated icily, pulling her bow away and turning to leave. "But all is well, because your Rin will probably shed enough tears for both of us on this night."

"Bitch!" he roared, forgetting himself and releasing his injured arm to swipe after her with his claws. The holy arrow in his flesh seemed to burn hotter at his temporary distraction and its power lanced further into his body. He hissed in fresh agony, slumping back to the ground.

Kikyou stared down at the demon lord, lost in the past. Somehow, she was not at all surprised to find out exactly how passionate and intense Sesshoumaru really was behind that careful, smooth façade.

_Why, it was almost like watching --- Inuyasha._

_No wonder that poor child Rin had lost her heart to this creature._

She was abruptly distracted from her thoughts by a low, pained growl, and she shifted her gaze to the many droplets of green acid and dark blood currently staining the snow. Sesshoumaru was fighting to remain conscious, and he was recovering much quicker than she would have anticipated. He was currently using the power of his own poison to not only burn away her arrow but whatever flesh had been tainted by her powers as well. "It seems you were right, my lord," she whispered with just a hint of admiration in her reflective voice. "I cannot seal you. But I cannot allow you to cause me further delay either. When you finish here, you should go to your little girl. Go to her and think hard about hurting her again." She retrieved what few arrows she could find from around the clearing and began to chant softly in prayer. She knocked one to her bowstring, drew the fletching to her pale cheek and fired, pinning the injured demon's left shoulder to the tree behind him.

Sesshoumaru snarled as the second arrow pierced his flesh, his eyes red-rimmed, his body feeling torn in two. His vision continued to darken, his form kept shifting against his will, and his every muscle, bone and sinew were tensed and fighting the purifying influence streaking in painful currents up his arm, seeking to end his life.

"As you leave me to my thoughts, miko, I leave you with yours," he called out blearily, smiling with dark satisfaction as he watched her limp slowly from the clearing. "You are so concerned with spreading tales of love, of heirs --- then you should already know --- Inuyasha will **NOT** follow you to hell. You have failed. You have lost him forever. Your replacement, Kagome, carries his child."

Kikyou's shoulders shook, and she turned back to the youkai, a sudden, helpless mixture of sadness and anger burning in her eyes. "So --- it is true?" she asked, speaking in a much higher pitch than she wished.

Sesshoumaru laughed again. "Ahh, perhaps you did n-not know?"

"I knew," she whispered, continuing on her way. "Kagome is part of my soul and --- I knew."

"Then you know he would die for his simpering Kagome. But for you? Now, perhaps, I think Inuyasha will be the one to kill you."

"You heartless, hateful monster! Why do you tempt me?!" she cried out, whirling to face him again and drawing her bow back so far that he thought it might snap in her hands. "You look just enough like Inuyasha to make this worthwhile! Gods, the only reason this arrow does not fly ---"

"Suki ni shiro! Do it!" he bellowed back in challenge, increasing the pressure against his bicep as another curling thread of power sought to bore further up his arm. "And this Sesshoumaru will teach you what true power is!" The air shimmered in a sudden, angry heat and the arrow protruding from his shoulder began to smolder and smoke.

He grinned in contempt and leaned forward, pulling the arrow's head free from the tree's bark. Slowly, he began to rise to his feet ---

Then, without any further warning, his whole form tensed and he gasped.

Kikyou bit back a gasp of her own as she watched those ragged purple lines of sacred power spread up his shoulder. They moved to disappear under the fabric of his haori, and then reappeared again on his chest, blistering his skin. "Gods, you arrogant beast, why didn't you just stay still?" she shouted angrily, as they fanned upwards and out across his throat and jawbone. The taiyoukai's golden eyes flew wide in confusion at her sudden concern, but only for a moment ---

Sesshoumaru's head nodded limply, his eyes fluttered closed and he fell back, feeling the reassuring rhythm of Tenseiga's power as it stirred at his side. For some reason, the small currents of holy energy did not seem quite so painful anymore, and a feeling of peace and security stole over him. The hard bark his back was pillowed against wasn't quite so rough, the freezing snow was so cool and smooth beneath his neck, and dreams were beginning to wash and color his mind ---

Kikyou returned to the demon's side, anxious to reassure herself that he would survive this experience with no lasting effects other than a bruise to his own lofty self-image. She ran her hand lightly over his perfect face, then into the indent of his neck. Pressing her fingers against his skin, she held her breath, not moving until she felt the slow beating that was his heart. Though somewhat curious to wait and see how long it would take for such a powerful youkai to fight off her spell, she knew it was suicide to linger here.

"Odaiji ni. Take care of yourself," The priestess whispered, smiling down at her sleeping opponent before turning to continue on her lonely journey. Humming quietly to herself, she disappeared into the darkness, feeling strangely compelled to wander further north.

* * *

_Everything was spinning in a fog, and when the world resettled itself, Sesshoumaru found himself staring into the shallow depths of the shimmering garden pond._

_He was no more than a boy, and he smiled down proudly, admiring himself. Over the past few seasons, he had grown a bit taller and his silver hair now trailed down to the small of his back. Though he appeared willowy and pale, he was strong --- a perfect reflection of his noble heritage. Known for his quick intellect and inquisitive nature, he was full of confidence and already quite sure of his station. He could explore the wide beach and march in and out of the shiro as he pleased, his booted feet beating in a dominating cadence as they echoed through the large halls._

_And --- as long as he was in the company of one of his parents --- he could now travel anywhere in the whole Western Lands._

_More often than not, though, it was Hahaue, not Chichiue, who would escort him on such extended journeys. She always watching him now, demonstrating that quiet, cold pride that made her seem a bit difficult to know._

_Well, difficult to outsiders at least._

_But, he knew her differently, and all the love and affection in him went to her._

_After all, only he understood how lonely she was these days._

_He kicked a small stone into the pond, scowling at his reflection as it rippled with the disturbed water. Yes, these days it was always Hahaue, who would join him in the training rooms, teaching him the sword and helping him hone his growing powers._

_But they couldn't train as hard as he'd like anymore --- after all, Hahaue WAS carrying his little brother! Or sister, he reminded himself, running his tongue over a fang that was coming lose. His eyes widened in expectation and he smiled at the knowledge that in just a few shorts months there would be someone for HIM to look after. And, maybe, when this new little one came, Chichiue would pay more attention --- to all of them._

_He heard the sound of bright laughter and music coming from within the shiro, and made his way inside to investigate. He found Hahaue leaning casually against the front alcove, her posture tense, her expression far away. Beyond her, he could see that once again, the genkan was full of all manner of humans who had come seeking audience with his Father. There were greasy merchants, chanting priests and puffed-up soldiers. There were servants, scholars, and bodyguards that he now knew he could snap in two with a mere flick of his wrist._

_And once again there were also those hordes of frail, adoring women, each dressed in layer upon layer of vividly-patterned silk, each one hopelessly vying to catch his Father's eye._

_His amber eyes grew guarded and surly._

_He wondered how Chichiue had patience for any one of them._

_It was no sooner than his thoughts turned to Chichiue when the man himself hailed him in a deep, kindly voice that rang out across the reception hall. His Father now stood at the top of the three low stairs of the wide dais, looking as regal and collected as ever. The great demon lord was currently smiling at him --- offering a lop-sided grin that spread from his mouth to his golden eyes, a grin full of approval, mischief and warmth. And, though HE tried not to answer that smile, though he tried to remain angry and aloof, a great pool of happiness came welling up from inside him. He smiled back at Chichiue in return, instantly forgetting about the humans as he recalled the exciting news he had to share._

_He felt a soft hand on his shoulder and knew without turning that Hahaue had stepped forward to stand at his side. He followed her lead as she marched further into the hall, joining her as she bowed respectfully to his Father._

_"You two!" Chichiue laughed, beckoning for them to come closer still. "Why do you stand like strangers in the doorway? Come --- join us! There is something I wish for you to hear!"_

_"And I have something I wish to tell you too, Chichiue!" he declared proudly, straightening quickly and slipping into his tale without delay. "We heard there was another oni that crossed our borders and it was killing some of our game and ---"_

_"I must speak first, Sesshoumaru," the taiyoukai replied softly, golden eyes twinkling in amusement at his son's youthful enthusiasm. "After all, what I would like to discuss has much to do with your patrols. From this day forward, you and your Mother will not have to travel so far or put yourselves in such danger. I have formed an alliance with this ningen family. Of any humans I have ever known, the daimyo Saneyori of the clan alone strives for real peace. Saneyori does not seek only power, but the wisdom to wield that power justly. So from this day forward the Katsumata clan will join us in securing and protecting the Western Lands. In return, I will help them win back some of their own territories, lands that were brutally stolen from them only recently. So --- I will be leaving with them --- but only for a short time."_

_Stunned by this unforeseen declaration, he and Hahaue remained silent, standing frozen in their surprise. He cast a quick look up at his mother, sneaking a glance from the corner of his eye, and knew in an instant that she was not at all pleased. At that moment a tall, battle-scarred ningen male, who he could only assume was this Lord Saneyori, came forward. The old warrior bowed deeply to them, his square chin and rough beard practically scraping the floor. The human then turned swiftly back to Chichiue, unrolling a long scroll that had been held in his sash._

_"My house will serve you, Inu no Taisho," Lord Saneyori read in a slow, sycophantic voice. "We will serve you, my Great Master, and your heirs, for as long as you watch over these Western Lands. We thank you for bringing order to our provinces, for keeping us safe, and for helping the Katsumata clan flourish and prosper. In return for your mighty protection, I humbly offer you the treasures of my house. Our armies, our crops, our laborers, our artisans, our musicians, anything you wish from us ---"_

_Listening to this human's pointless sniveling speech, he stayed frozen where he stood, his small fists clenching and unclenching at his sides. He shook his pale head, hardly daring to believe what was happening! Had Chichiue really just agreed to SHARE their lands? He crossed his arms and shifted his weight from one foot to the other in agitation, as Lord Saneyori kept reading that inane little proclamation. Somehow, he knew instinctively that the human's toadying speech was only going to become even MORE long-winded and dull as it went on. He tried his best to close his mind to the incessant drone ---_

_His sharp, amber eyes suddenly fell upon a slim, young woman who stood directly across the hall from him. The girl was peering out from behind a paper fan adorned with sakura blossoms, standing precariously on the tips of her toes, and craning her neck to look over the gathered crowd. She was wearing those ridiculous high sandals that those human women seemed so fond of and her tiny feet were slipping through the bindings. But she was SO intent on getting a better look at the main dais that she didn't seem to notice._

_He smirked to himself at her stupidity._

_The very minute the crowd shifted, that little fool would end up on the ground! But what was she looking at anyway? What could have drawn her interest so deeply that she was now poised for certain social disaster? His curiosity piqued, he followed the girl's gaze, wondering what held the silly creature so enthralled._

_To his great surprise, he found she was staring straight at his Father with a kind of fascination --- almost as if she couldn't look elsewhere, even if she wanted to._

_Sure enough, at that very moment, the bright crowd suddenly parted as the humans noisily clapped their hands when Lord Saneyori finally came to the conclusion of the speech. The young woman lost her balance and tripped into the open, sprawling across the polished floor. Her fan fell from her hand with a noisy clatter and the crowd gasped its surprise in near perfect unison. From her prone position, the girl pressed her hands to her face in mortification, looking around wildly as she struggled to regain her composure._

_It was then the he got his first really good look at her._

_The girl's face, no longer concealed behind the fan, was startlingly, indescribably beautiful. She was graced with large, expressive eyes and a teasing, sweet red mouth. All of her features were so balanced, it seemed more likely that she had been carved by a sculptor, rather than born to a lowly, miserable mortal! Her robe was ornate and flowing, its hue the brilliant orange-gold of a sunset. And crowning and perfecting her look was her glorious hair. It was woven with white, new spring flowers and fell in long, ebony waves reaching past her knees. Though now a bit tousled from her unexpected fall, that soft mass swept against her flawless skin, fanning and framing her rather becoming blush. Still quite surprised to find herself in her current position, she rose to stand before the assembled throng, and bowed demurely to Chichiue._

_Maintaining his impassive vigil, he watched as the taiyoukai gazed back at the woman in return. He couldn't fail to mark how his Father also stumbled and took a small step to steady himself as a spark of --- something --- flared in his golden eyes. But, whatever that look was, it died rather quickly, as Hahaue abruptly crossed the hall, leaving his side without a word to go stand at his father's._

_The human woman's blush now flamed to the same shade of crimson as her kimono, and she bowed again to both of his parents. Lord Saneyori released a nervous laugh at the girl's actions and smiled apologetically. "Please forgive my daughter, my lord," the old daimyo mumbled, sinking to his knees while wringing the sleeves of his fine robe. "She has been most anxious to meet the Inu no Taisho. All her life, she has heard many stories and tales. So, my Master, my lady, my young lord, may I present you with the princess Agemaki."_

_He continued to analyze this whole introduction carefully and remained rooted to his spot, staring over Chichiue's flushed face to focus fully on this Agemaki creature. He quickly measured her against his Mother, not sure he had ever seen two women so opposite in nature and appearance ---_

_Hahaue was a thoroughly imposing figure, her tall frame splendidly sheathed in finely polished armor and jewels. Her hair, though as long as the princess', was bound and plaited in a thick braid, each ivory strand of its soft mass in its perfect place and shining more brightly than the silver band circling her forehead. Her skin was as pale and white as the moon, and her slit-eyes full of fire and confidence._

_The ningen girl, while equally beautiful, was almost dark by comparison and about as thin as one of the reeds framing the garden pond. And as for imposing? All and all, he sneered in his mind, Agemaki was as threatening as a butterfly newly hatched from its cocoon!_

_So --- besides her clumsy little fall, what was it about her that caught Father's attention?_

_She was nothing._

_What power did she hold?_

_She didn't even seem have the ability to hold herself upright, he snorted inwardly, watching with interest as Chichiue politely helped the girl to her feet. As her small hands met his Father's, he continued to assess the young woman, from the filmy, drifting layers of her clothes, to her shining, fragrant hair, to the slightly provocative angle of her almond eyes. Besides being strikingly pretty, he had to reluctantly admit, Agemaki seemed to have at least SOME intelligence. It was obvious that she, TOO, had perceived that sudden change in Chichiue's expression. She HAD obviously seen the taiyoukai's profuse blush and noticed the quickened rhythm of his breath, for she was now responding in kind._

_Agemaki smiled up at Chichiue gratefully, and now that her own lord father had delivered his hastily stammered introduction, her whole demeanor seemed to change. She straightened and strode forward with all the grace of a dancer, pressing her frail hands together. "Inu no Taisho," she said in a musical voice, raising a little hand to coyly hide her full lips behind her palm. "My Father's proclamations and speeches can go on for days if you do not interrupt him. I am truly sorry for ruining the ceremony of this occasion, but I have my own thanks to offer."_

_Chichiue seemed to be having difficulty finding his voice. His Father was now staring back and forth from the Lord Saneyori to the young woman incredulously. "This is --- this your daughter?" the taiyoukai stammered. "This is Agemaki-hime? S-she is the very image of her mother."_

_"That she is," Lord Saneyori agreed with a wistful sigh. "And both would have died long ago if it weren't for your honored wife, the beautiful Lady Sesseika." The aged daimyo smiled and bowed deeply to Hahaue, while Chichiue cleared his throat quickly, as if he had temporarily forgotten his wife had been standing so close._

_Hahaue seemed unfazed by Chichiue's obvious discomfort. She stepped up to Agemaki, looking down her long nose as if examining an insect, her great height and commanding stature forcing the suddenly far too uncomfortable young woman to back up several hasty steps. The princess almost fell again in the process, this time tripping over the trailing hems of her costly gowns._

_"Sesseika?" His Father pressed curiously, obviously trying to get any form of conversation flowing again. "What is this tale? You saved them?"_

_He heard Hahaue sigh in resignation and watched her flash a brooding smile. "Yes, it does not seem all that long ago, but, they were attacked by a pair of --- c-centipedes." Her voice trailed off quietly, as Chichiue led the beaming princess up the stairs to the low table prepared on the dais._

_He blinked his honeyed eyes up at his Father, completely taken aback. The girl followed the taiyoukai readily, moving with delicate, mincing steps, her face fairly burning with pride. She settled herself comfortably beside the great demon, sinking into the silk pillows and cushions in one graceful movement. Then, as dutifully and meekly as a slave, the princess began to serve Chichiue, offering him that strong drink that humans were so fond of, and inviting him to sample the other strange dishes they had brought. The lord and human woman smiled at each other, and fell into easy banter, laughing as if they had known one another all their lives. The supposed formality of their setting seemed to fade from their minds --- in fact, it seemed that they forgot there was an audience surrounding them altogether._

_Presently, Chichiue turned back to Lord Saneyori. "Tell me," he asked. "How did my Sesseika save your now departed wife? Lady Izayoi --- that was her name, was it not?"_

_"Yes," Lord Saneyori answered solemnly, his eyes seeming to mist at some memory. "It was nearly twenty years ago, when my late first-wife, Izayoi, came to live with the Katsumata clan. Our marriage had been arranged since nearly before she was born, for she had lost most of her own great family to war. Her own house was far to the east and she knew no one among my people. She was young, and bored, and prone to foolish stunts to pass the days. Much like this one here," the grizzled daimyo paused, offering Agemaki an affectionate nod while the girl pouted prettily. "We had been joined for several months, and we were expecting our first-born when she foolishly decided to sneak from the compound, choosing to join our servants collecting firewood in the forest. Their party was ambushed by a monstrous centipede youkai and Sesseika-sama, along with your young heir, saved them ---"_

_Upon hearing that small reference to himself, he finally decided to cross the main floor, and joined his parents and the humans at the table. Seating himself quickly, he watched as Hahaue shifted in obvious tension as the story continued to be told, noting how her glittering eyes never left Agemaki's face. What was going on?! If Hahaue's expression and the rigid set of her shoulders were any indication, it would appear that she thought this little creature was dangerous for some bizarre reason!_

_"Hnnnnn, seems like the Lady Izayoi was in need of quite a few rescues," Hahaue muttered dryly, turning to Chichiue. "Danna, if I am not mistaken, didn't you have to save her once or twice as well?"_

_Chichiue let out a small laugh, and threw Hahaue a loving and patient smile._

_Now in much closer proximity to his Mother again, he could clearly see that she was not at all appeased by Father's actions --- after all, the demon lord never did answer her query, choosing to return to his meal instead of replying._

_"Tell me, Lord Saneyori," Hahaue questioned blandly, lifting a fine porcelain cup to her full lips. He observed how she cleverly paused then, stopping to take in a few deep sips of sake and forcing the daimyo to wait expectantly for her next words. When the tension was almost unbearable, she finally continued on in a sweet tone, "Why is it that you humans do not teach your females to fight? After all, I believe there should be more to a woman than beauty and a willingness to walk meekly in the shadow of her lord."_

_No one seemed to want to challenge the clear, sarcastic edge in her deceptively gentle voice._

_"Yes, aaaahhhh --- I am not sure how to answer that, my Lady," Saneyori stammered, shifting to stare up at Chichiue quickly. "We live quite differently from y-youkai. A-anyway, my lord, back to the story --- my good, departed wife and my sweet daughter were ultimately saved from that merciless beast and, as you can see, Agemaki is now a woman grown. She will soon to be married herself ---"_

_Sitting just a few feet away, his wide child's eyes caught how Agemaki trembled at that rushed announcement. And though he clearly felt the tell-tale skip of her frightened heart, Saneyori continued on, seemingly oblivious to his daughter's sudden fear._

_"Next spring I will take her to meet the man I have chosen for her," the old warrior rattled on._

_Agemaki's eyelashes fluttered closed at that final statement and she sighed heavily. "Then I hope that the winter lingers forever this year," she muttered under her breath. Until that moment, she had been smiling sweetly, but now it appeared she might lapse into uncontrollable tears at any moment._

_"Do not look so sad," Chichiue said softly, taking note of the girl's anxious and vulnerable expression. "You should smile," the taiyoukai added kindly, turning Agemaki's stiff chin up with a cupped hand._

_His Father's fingers drifted upwards, fleetingly catching on the flowers woven through the princess' shining hair. "And --- and you should always wear flowers like these. They suit you."_

_Agemaki looked on, her face full of despair and scarcely veiled longing, and he could hear the swift, sensual breaking of her breath. "But I am afraid, Inu no Taisho. I-I do not know this man that father has chosen for me," she whispered. "And I shall have to leave everything I know. Everything I love."_

_At the girl's halting admission, Hahaue suddenly leaned forward and grinned ferally, her crimson lips in perfect dramatic contrast from her even white teeth. "Come ojousama, do not despair," she chided in the very same voice she used when she helped gentle Aun. "After all, my own marriage to the lord of these Lands was arranged." Her thin, black eyebrows arched to disappear under her wispy silver bangs and she raised her cup again, this time in a dismissive salute. "Perhaps, my dear Agemaki, you too shall be as blessed as I to find a husband you can love. A husband of your very own."_

_The girl nodded dumbly at Hahaue's seemingly sincere wish for her fate, and then she turned her strange, mournful smile back to Chichiue. "Maybe, my lady," he heard her whisper after an exaggerated break. "But I still should have liked to have been the one to choose my husband. Maybe someday --- my own daughters will be so fortunate." Her soft brown eyes were clouded, and in her distraction the trailing edge of her sleeve pulled a sake tokkuri from the table. The earthenware jar was up-ended, splashing its contents across Hahaue's beautiful pastel robes. "Oh, noooo!!!" Agemaki bleated, utterly distressed. "Oh, I am so, so sorry, my lady!"_

_"It is alright," Hahaue stated graciously, as she regarded the wide stain blooming across her hakama. Though her expression seemed soft and forgiving, her grin was no longer brightening her amber eyes. She wiped at the horribly ruined silk to no effect._

_His annoyance mounted as he watched Chichiue politely take Agemaki's hand to help the girl around the table. Well, at least he could take some satisfaction in the fact that his Father now looked extremely out of sorts as performed this simple, common courtesy. It appeared that the mighty Inu no Taisho, with his kind soul that always looked for the good in any creature, and his always honest intentions, was finally beginning to realize that this foolish ningen's feelings went far beyond mere devotion to her lord ---_

_Agemaki didn't seem to want to let go of his Father's hand, even as she bowed to Hahaue, apologizing profusely. "I am so clumsy!" she whined. "Please, let me make amends! As my father said --- we will give you the best that our family has to offer! And --- and we much have finer silks than these at our shiro!" The girl bit back a gasp and hurriedly raised her fan to hide her red lips. "I mean, I realize you d-dress in this manner because you are nearly always in battle but ---"_

_From where he sat stunned, he saw Hahaue's spine stiffen and he found he could not stop the rumbling growl that was building in his chest. He decided he did not like this Agemaki AT ALL. As far as he could tell, she was nothing more than an empty-headed little upstart with a few bold dreams. Bold dreams that quite obviously included gaining some measure of admiration and affection from his Father._

_But Hahaue had gone back to ignoring the young princess, turning her full attention to Chichiue again. "All this talk about defending ningen villages and wayward ningen girls and you have yet to ask about your son," she stated dryly, dismissing Agemaki's thinly veiled insult and changing the subject once more. "As I keep telling you, Sesshoumaru is exceptionally powerfully for one so young ---"_

_Hahaue's golden eyes were now practically burning in her pride and fierce delight. "When we were attacked by those miserable oni --- a --- band --- a whip of poison --- burst from Sesshoumaru's claws! It was amazing and far greater than my own skill! It was swift as a storm wind and just as powerful as the strike of lightning! Nothing could come near us!"_

_He watched as Chichiue's face and form seemed to tighten for the slightest of moments, but the tall taiyoukai did not say anything at first, obviously trying to mask vast displeasure. Unconsciously, from where he sat, his own small shoulders hunched in reaction. He knew precisely why his Father so was upset ---_

_Chichiue believed he was still too young to fight._

_Not only that, but his Father had had specifically asked his Mother not to look for trouble and to cease all needless combat until the new child was born._

_But Chichiue would never dare correct Hahaue in the presence of all these humans, no matter how much leeway or favor he appeared to give them, and so now they all sat in a tense, awkward hush. As long minutes dragged on, the only noises he could hear were the tinkling of fine porcelain and the cries of the gulls flying outside._

_"But I should not be telling this story!" Hahaue finally stated loudly, startling him and nearly everyone else at the table with her fervor. He saw her calculating eyes moving appraisingly over the many humans of Lord Saneyori's retinue, noting how she focused a lazy sneer on the many bodyguards standing at attention along the hall. "Sesshoumaru, my treasure, YOU tell your Father what you have done!"_

_"Sesshoumaru, what is this power of yours? Show me," Chichiue asked, his handsome face finally softening and filling with intense curiosity as he met his gaze._

_At his Father's mild command, he immediately rose to his feet and tread closer to the demon lord, padding under the warm glow of the lanterns. He knelt at Chichiue's side, torn half-way between a child's resentment and blind, adoring worship._

_And --- and he wasn't sure what to do next._

_As his mother had a scant minute before, he allowed his gaze to drift around the hall, eyes traveling over the faces of the many ningen eagerly awaiting their own audiences._

_In that moment, his bitter jealousy and anger instantly won._

_"Hahaue and I were patrolling the borders," he began in his most imperious voice. "Even though you asked us not to. And --- and I found out I can do this ---" He held up his right hand as a faint green glow built around his talons. He let his youki spark and writhe until it formed into one thin stream of power. But then he let it die out, the indignity and weight of it all becoming too much to bare._

_"I can --- I can do ---" he let his words die like his youki, trailing off with a disappointed sigh. "It does not matter what I can do. I killed another weak, pathetic demon, that is all. And then Hahaue and I looked for some more. But we found nothing. Nothing ---- but more of these worthless humans trying to set up a new settlement on OUR lands!" Now his words were flowing in a torrent, and he found he could not stop them from continuing. "More ningen come to the West everyday, for they --- they will be s-sheltered here and they multiply like filthy rats, knowing they will be cared for and protected like spoiled children!"_

_At that moment, he felt a building rise of outraged youki radiating out front of him --- but, strangely, it did not originate from Chichiue. The taiyoukai was just sitting before him in shocked silence, his big clawed hands frozen on the table, his usually up-turned mouth now thin and closed as tightly as a trap._

_His keen senses prickled again, and he looked past Chichiue's dumb expression of hurt and sadness to focus solely on Hahaue instead. The spike of power he felt had erupted from HER form, and her usually stoic expression was now one of utter bewilderment. And --- and she was crying?! He watched in astonishment as a single tear drifted down the planes of her noble face. Her eyes narrowed when she met his gaze and she quickly reached up to swipe at her damp cheek, destroying the evidence of her deep pain before anyone else could notice._

_He glanced away from her and tried to press on quickly with what he needed to say. "Ummm, Chichiue, what I mean is --- Hahaue and I WOULD like some assistance --- but we do not want or need help from these ningen --- why can we never find you any more?"_

_"Sesshoumaru," Hahaue interrupted in a voice that was flat, dangerous and meant to be instantly obeyed. "Now is NOT the time for such talk."_

_He raised his stubborn chin in rebellion. He didn't understand why his words were hurting his mother. And he didn't understand why she was getting mad at HIM either, after all, in publicly shaming his father he was only hoping to defend her. Maybe Chichiue didn't realize just how alone and ignored they felt! He glanced back at Hahaue again and thought to give it one more try. "Ahhhh, Chichiue, what I mean to say is --- that --- that is harder for me, your son, to gain your audience than it is for any one of this swarm of whining ningen ANIMALS!" He slammed his fist down on the table, as the humans seated around him jumped and shivered in instant fear. He took no small measure of delight in the fact that princess Agemaki seemed to be the most distraught of all. He fixed her with hard, sullen eyes, hating everything about her. The girl hid her face behind her pretty fan and shrank back submissively. He offered her one last sneer of disgust and then turned away, anxiously awaiting Chichiue's reaction._

_But there was none. His Father was still completely stunned --- absolutely speechless and mute. His Mother, apparently, was NOT._

_"**SESSHOUMARU!** Back into the gardens --- NOW!" she hissed icily._

_The next snide remark he had been planning to spit out choked in his throat as he watched Hahaue's look of simple anger give way to a one of barely controlled rage. (Which was a shame really, he thought. His next comment would have been a particularly clever and cutting one about the stupid Agemaki's scent and it probably would have sent her fleeing from the hall with big, fat, tears flying in every direction.) His mouth snapped shut though, still not understanding why his Mother was so furious. She SHOULD be grateful to him. His words were putting those greedy, grasping humans back in their places and, more importantly, they were alerting Chichiue to the fact that they felt neglected, ignored --- forgotten._

_With another growl, he pushed away from the table as violently as he could, upsetting a few more fine porcelain bowls in the process. Stomping his booted feet dramatically, he followed Hahaue out to the gardens, not really sure of what would happen next._

_She walked along the narrow, winding path before him, her head held high. Only when satisfied that they were far enough from the main house, did she turn slowly to watch his approach, her expression still brimming with fury._

_But he could also see a measure of sadness there as well. He could smell the distinctive floral scent of her power, as if she was using the Dokkasou to mask her tears. With a clipped gesture, she motioned for him to sit at her feet, her eyes never leaving his face._

_He suddenly found he was pressing his white hands to his knees to hide their shaking. He had thought his plan was brilliant, but he had displeased her greatly --- gods, he NEVER displeased her._

_"Sesshoumaru," she spoke at long last, and, despite preparing himself for a rebuke, he still jumped at the harshness of her tone._

_"Hai, Hahaue," he mumbled under his breath. Gods --- he hadn't heard her sound like this since long ago with the centipedes!_

_"My son, on this day I am going to teach you another lesson. One I pray you will NEVER forget."_

_He fidgeted uneasily, wondering if he was actually going to be punished. Maybe Hahaue would insist that Chichiue take Aun away from him! He didn't even want to think about it, especially after all his hard work in taming the dragon! He was suddenly distracted from that very dismal thought by the return of music and laughing voices chiming from within the genkan again._

_The festivities, the awful celebration --- everything was continuing as if nothing had ever happened!_

_Another small growl built in his throat and then he was silenced as Hahaue's white hand snapped forward, catching him by the chin. He swallowed noisily, withering under the piercing glow of her gaze as her slit-pupils bored steadily into his._

_But she did not scold or yell next, even though he half expected her to. She merely cleared her throat and began to speak in a low, soothing voice. "Sesshoumaru, please realize that there is not one single moment on any single day that hundreds of creatures, both ningen and youkai alike, do not know where your great Father and I are, or what we are doing. For when we issue a command, all of these creatures rush to obey us. And when we are silent, they ALL tremble and shudder in fear. Our names are caught on the lips and buried in the hearts of all who live in these Western Lands, for our favor means life."_

_She sighed heavily, released him, and drew her sword from its thin, lacquered sheath. Turning the weapon over and over in her hands idly, she continued with a half-smile. "And our wrath, Sesshoumaru, it brings instant death. We are powerful taiyoukai and we have many powers and strengths. But there is ONE strength that is greater than all others and, surprisingly, it is something that any creature can possess."_

_"Any creature?" he breathed, completely intrigued._

_"ANY creature," she confirmed with a small nod, re-sheathing her curved sword. She took him by the shoulders, and turned him to face her fully. "Any creature, from the mightiest demon to the filthiest human beggar. And this strength is the most powerful weapon of all, and it is something no enemy can ever reach --- well, at least not unless you allow them to."_

_"What is it, Hahaue? Tell this Sesshoumaru about this strength!" he demanded, suddenly forgetting his fear of punishment. In fact, it looked like he wasn't to be punished at all! He leaned closer and tugged demandingly at her sleeve, eager to learn whatever hidden secret she would impart._

_"It is our inner-most thoughts and our hidden pain, my son," she murmured, her hand gently tracing the crescent moon on his forehead. "Never utter ANY word without giving it the greatest deliberation. This is something we all must learn and I would rather you learn it now, today, than on a field of battle. I always weigh my decisions carefully before I speak for I know that once I HAVE spoken, each and every one of my words will most likely be repeated all over our lands. So, you must never foolishly display your clever inner mind or reveal too many of your bright conclusions in front of anyone --- oh, here," she broke off unexpectedly. Her hands clasped his and she pulled them to her belly allowing him to feel the trembling movement of the baby within._

_"You must never so casually reveal your most secret thoughts or allow others to discover what ails your heart," she repeated slowly, stroking his hair as he leaned to press his cheek to her armor, listening to the lulling rhythm of two strong heartbeats._

_"But ---" he sputtered, his thoughts flashing out of his meditative peace and back to the many humans in the genkan. "This Sesshoumaru had to say something! T-This is not right!" He pulled away from her stubbornly, stomped away and leaned heavily against the garden wall. "Hahaue, I would have waited until Chichiue was alone, but he is never alone anymore, is he? And that stupid woman. Agemaki --- so --- so disrespectful."_

_Vaguely, he realized some poison had seeped from his claws during his short outburst. He quickly shifted his position, trying to hide the fact that two basins of acid were burning into the rocks where his hands had rested._

_Hahaue sighed in exasperation. "Amaenbou --- spoiled little thing."_

_But he could feel her underlying gratitude, and knew without a doubt that she was currently trying to disguise her real emotions almost as desperately as he was trying to disguise the damage he had just caused to the garden wall. He knew instinctively that deep inside she was quite touched that he had defended her, but --- but she was right, of course._

_He should have found some way to speak to Chichiue ALONE, just as she was advising him now._

_Gods --- all of his lessons seemed to come from Hahaue these days. What was wrong with his Father? What was so damn special about these human creatures anyway?_

_Agemaki!_

_Who the hell cared that she had the same face and 'adventurous spirit' of her mother!_

_Adventurous spirit?_

_One woman who ran straight into the jaws of youkai! And another who insulted his own Mother batted her long eyelashes at Chichiue!_

_There was nothing adventurous about either of these actions --- they were brainless, rash, and impulsive. And THAT was what they said all the women in their line were like?! It was a wonder they weren't all dead already!_

_As distasteful as it was, he forced himself to remember the long ago day in the forest with the centipede demons more clearly and that simpering creature's mother, Izayoi, when she had been no more than a mere girl herself. Now that he thought about it, the two women did look strikingly similar. He recalled how Izayoi had groveled at his feet, babbling incoherently._

_Now it came as no surprise now why she had clung to his knees so desperate, so relieved!_

_As the lord Saneyori had said, Hahaue had not only saved her that day, but the unborn Agemaki as well. And then Izayoi had lived on to become the honored matriarch of her pitiful clan, she had aged, she had grown weak and frail, and --- she had died. But, as those long years had flown past, his own mother had remained ever-young and beautiful, and he was still no more than a boy._

_Years? Who needed to count years?_

_Agemaki, with her shy looks that were every bit as fawning as Izayoi's, was a woman now. As her pathetic father had announced in the hall of the shiro, she would soon be traded-off to some other human clan. The girl would wed and have daughters of her own, and then they would have daughters and so on, and so on. What did he care if every one of HER stupid offspring had that same stupid smiling face for all time! That face would never haunt him! He stiffened in anger, his full bottom lip sticking out mutinously ---_

_Hahaue patted his cheek to snap him out of his brooding, and laughed lightly as he jumped in surprise. "My goodness! Do not scowl so, my treasure!" she chided. "And do not worry about your Mother, she can fight her own battles and take care of herself!"_

_All at once she grew serious again. "But please, Sesshoumaru, think very hard about what I have explained to you today. Do not EVER speak your true mind, except perhaps to those you take as your most trusted friends. But, I must warn you, in your life there will be very few you CAN take as friends. For if you wish to surpass your Father and I and reach the height of power you were born for, you will be truly alone. There will be no one you can turn to. Except maybe to Inuyasha, of course."_

_"Inuyasha?"_

_She rubbed her white hand along the curve of her belly again. "Inuyasha," she repeated with loving grin. "That is the name I will call this one if it is a boy."_

_"Is it a boy?" he asked eagerly, his mind filling with images of the mock-battles and games, of competition and sport, and all of the other countless adventures a younger brother could provide._

_"I am not sure. But your Father seems to think so," she replied. "He chose the name, after all. Do you like it, Sesshou-chan?"_

_He repeated the name over in his mind and decided he wasn't exactly sure. "It's alright." He proudly pondered his own name for a second. too, partial to its dignified and deadly meaning. He shrugged noncommittally. "Inu ---yasha. Doesn't sound very --- noble --- at all."_

_Hahaue's laughter chimed out. "No, I suppose not. But Chichiue says it will be quite easy for the ningen to remember when they need ---"_

_The happiness of the moment vanished once more. "All for humans?!" he blurted out heatedly. "Again? We are making it easier for them again? Even with a stupid name?!" His arm shot out, and there was a flash of light as he impulsively decided to unleash the power he had been unwilling to demonstrate for his Father in the great hall. In the next instant, one of the stone cochin in the garden was reduced to a molten pile of sludge._

_"Sesshoumaru! What has gotten into you?" Hahaue scolded, throwing her hands in the air as she surveyed the damage._

_His Mother caught him quickly, as he tried to flee, just wanting to sulk alone in his quarters. "Yes, humans, Sesshoumaru!" she barked, gripping him tightly by the arm, as he struggled to get away. "Cease these tantrums at once! Have you heard nothing I have said this afternoon? Understand, my son, that before long those words you spoke to your Great Father, though you believe he deserved to hear them, will be repeated over and over throughout the courts of those whining humans! The lords will whisper among themselves. And then their gossip will reach their fragile, little women --- those very same painted birds who flock and preen and try to catch your Father's pretty eyes. Next it will reach the ears of their servants, as they prepare their master's meals, curry their horses, and draw their baths! And so on, and so on!" She knelt to his level, her face beseeching, giving him a moment to absorb all of her patient words._

_"And very soon," she murmured, watching the understanding bloom in his young face, "very soon every great sweaty peasant in every great muddy rice-field will know that their Master's heir is unhappy. They will know that so well-born, noble and powerful a youkai lord envies even the poorest farmer for the time and attention of his Father! And THAT, Sesshoumaru, will give them terrible power OVER you!!!"_

_He fell back with a gasp, and worried his lip with a fang as he watched her, marveling at her simple wisdom. Once again, it seemed so embarrassingly obvious and he wondered now how he could have been so careless. All because of a few pitiful humans --- why ever did he allow such insignificant creatures to drive him to such outbursts?_

_Hahaue looked away and up into the sky, the sunlight filtering through the heavy ocean clouds casting her in a warm glow. "And the time is fast approaching, my son, when such carelessness can cost us quite dearly. Your Father does not leave us because he has any greater love for these human creatures, no matter what whispers and petty rumors you might hear! The real reason your Father must go is because the humans have been attacked by a terrible demon. It seems Ryukossei has returned to our lands and ---"_

_"Ryukossei? Who is Ryukossei?" he asked. Ryukossei? A dragon? He eagerly awaited her response, intrigued by the seriousness in her tone._

_Hahaue sighed. "He is an ancient demon, a great taiyoukai like us. But he is strong and cruel and far too clever and greedy for his own good! For months now he has been stirring up the trouble, and attacking the lands that border our own. He has been making pledges and forging pacts with these human warlords and daimyos --- just as your Father has! Though unlike the Inu no Taisho, Ryukossei will most likely devour his loyal subjects when he is through with them!" She barely concealed her sardonic laugh. "That monster wants OUR lands for himself and he has been killing our kind since --- long, long before you were born. But your Father and I will put a stop to him this time, though it will not be easy. After all, neither of us have waged war against so powerful a rival."_

_He found he did not like to hear her voice so full of doubt and, wait, there was some other scrambled memory creeping in --- Ryukossei? Didn't he already know something about that demon ---_

_Didn't something happen with him? Something awful?_

_Enormous red-slitted eyes flashed in his mind. Then an image of bright flames and crooked rows of needle-teeth stained with black blood. What!?_

_Everything in his mind shifted, months flowing by, scenes and memories snapping and changing all around him ---_

_It was suddenly night, and he awoke with a start, his eyes blinking sleepily at a strange orange haze coming from beyond his window. Confused, he rose from the comforting warmth of his bed, and moved to look outside, staring not out over the sea as he usually did, but up into the dome of the sky instead. Sweeping his tousled silver hair out of his eyes, he dimly noted that the full moon now hung at its highest point and not a single breeze was stirring from the bay. In fact, he realized, the air was incredibly --- almost unnaturally --- still. He inhaled deeply, surprised to take in the scent of smoke coupled with the scent of --- another --- another demon? He had just begun to ponder over who the intruder might be, when the eerie quiet was suddenly broken by the frantic pounding of running footsteps in the hall._

_The door was flung wide and in the next instant, Hahaue had caught him round the chest, knocking him to the ground as the wall he had been leaning against erupted into an explosion of flame. Before he could even regain his breath or comprehend what had just occurred, she was snatching him up to his feet. She dragged him out through a fractured hole in the ruined wall and down the twisting corridors._

_"Hahaue!" he choked, squinting through the deadly glare of flames. "What's happening?!"_

_"The demon --- R-ryukossei!" she panted, shielding him under her armored shoulder as long, burning ceiling beams crashed down around them. "Come on!"_

_He heard an uncharacteristic rattle of steel as she fumbled_ _with her scabbard and he realized her hands were trembling as she drew her sword._

_At that moment, his confusion vanished and he felt his first taste of fear. Hahaue was --- shaking. She was frightened. And if his mother was frightened, there had to be good cause. He spun around quickly, suddenly noticing that all along the corridor, the tall, wooden screen doors were inching open, and the very walls of the shiro were creaking in strain. The main house was bowing and cracking, collapsing under the weight of some enormous creature that was clearly hovering above them. His eyes were burning from all the smoldering ash in the air, but he told himself to remain silent and calm for Hahaue's sake._

_Together they continued to move through the ruins of their home, each and every footstep careful, quiet and furtive. When they finally reached the once bright reception hall, he stared up in disbelief at what awaited them: the entire ceiling of this part of the shiro was gone, and, beyond, he could see that the high walls and gate of the courtyard were nothing more than scattered, twisted debris. They moved to turn back again, to retrace their path, but the flames had built and now the main corridor was nothing more than a deadly sea of fire. Crossing the great hall was their only option, but that would leave them exposed --- helpless in the open._

_They retreated as far as the growing blaze would allow and rested momentarily, pausing in the entry way of the shrine. Staying as close to the floor as possible, they fought to find good, clean air and tried to catch their breaths._

_"I had heard so many stories --- but I ---was --- not ready. I have never before felt p-power like that," Hahaue whispered in between a hoarse spell of coughing._

_He nodded at her absently, his whole attention focused on a plume of incense that wavered in an odd, sudden draft. A mere second later, the armor and weapons on the walls began to rattle. There was a loud crack, and their horrified eyes became fixed on a ragged split snaking its way through the far wall._

_"MOVE!" Hahaue shouted and together they raced back they way they came._

_All too quickly, they arrived back at that destruction that was formerly the great hall. His Mother caught his doubtful look as they both stared across the empty expanse stretching before them. "We have no choice," she whispered, ducking behind a split column and motioning for him to do the same. She pushed a few loose tendrils of her sweaty hair back over her shoulder, her nose twitching as she scented the air. Appearing somewhat satisfied with the danger level, she prepared to step out into what was left of the room, grabbing his hand and squeezing it tightly. "Are you ready?"_

_He nodded, his stomach rolling with nausea, his head reeling from the overpowering smoke._

_"Good! We have to find your Father! I am no match for this worm."_

_An unfamiliar laugh suddenly rang out high above them. "That is correct, my Lady, you are no match for me."_

_He cried out in alarm as a shifting beast reared up from where it lay hidden in the shadows, the sheer magnitude of its bulk blocking out the sea and stars. In all his life, he had never known such a demon existed --- it even dwarfed Chichiue in his truest form! He found he could not move, even though his senses began to clamor wildly within him, and every demon instinct he possessed screamed that he should flee._

_This Ryukossei WAS a great dragon: all claws and armored scales, and a great leering mouth. The creature was grinning down at them, exposing rows upon rows of jagged teeth that glittered like slivers of diamonds, so cold and hard in the fire's light. In the middle of the beast's forehead, he saw there was another face, this one ghostly and cruel, with skin that was a deep, wild blue. Seated deeply within that second face, were two eyes that were fierce and glowing crimson. And somehow, for some reason, THOSE cunning eyes were a thousand times more terrifying than the reptilian eyes of the dragon beneath them._

_For one long, frozen moment, this monster glided towards them with a sickening slowness, and he glanced up at his Mother, surprised to find her gaze fixed firmly upon HIM instead of upon the advancing predator. She offered him a small, sad smile and then there was an echoing boom as the last of the wooden rafters above them splintered into pieces. What little remained of the charred ceiling came crashing down upon them, leaving them no choice but to leap forward where there was nowhere left to hide._

_When the dust and ash cleared, Hahaue pulled him tightly against her side. "Are you hurt?" she asked quickly, her sword held at the ready, her arm no longer shaking. He shook his head quickly, and together, they advanced forward in a slow march._

_Ryukossei beamed at their wariness, their hesitation. He waved a clawed hand in a surprisingly cordial gesture, inviting them closer and then that voice boomed out again, "Trying to sneak away so soon, my lady? Tell me, if you are not up to the challenge of facing me yourself, then where is your great lord husband this night?"_

_He felt Hahaue's arms tense about his shoulders and then she pushed him behind her forcefully. "You brute --- you should be grateful the Inu no Taisho is not here," she shouted defiantly. "You do not strike me as the type who wishes for a fair challenge!"_

_"A fair challenge?" Ryukossei questioned in return. His bright coils whipped around to encircle them, cutting of all possible escape routes in the span of an eye blink. "Tell me, will it be a 'fair' challenge when you stand by your husband's side to fight me? Or would it be 'fair' when that little whelp behind you would join in the hunt as well?" The dragon's tongue flicked out to scent the air, all those eyes focused squarely upon HIM, and that strange face smiled with glee. "Yes, there he is! The noble young lord! I have heard much of him. Of how strong he grows with each passing day! My --- how precious he looks! How innocent. How --- tasty. You can run along now, Sesseika, run and live --- but your son is my prey."_

_"Bastard!" she shrieked, drawing herself up to her full height, her eyes filled with rage. "How dare you! Do you think I will let you touch him?!"_

_The dragon cut off her words with an echoing laugh. "Then shut your pretty mouth and save your strength for fighting, my lady. You inu-youkai never learn. I knew you would not abandon him, but I was curious all the same."_

_Ryukossei's monstrous form wound further around them, and all of the dragon's pent up hunger, ambition and anger seemed to break forth in his words like a wave. "After all, I cannot allow YOU to live either, Sesseika," he jeered. "For even if I kill THIS particular pup --- your belly is still swollen and fat with another! You will just keep spawning new enemies for me to stand against, won't you, bitch?"_

_The beast's grin stretched so wide that it looked like his face might split in two and he continued with his sadistic taunts. "It is a shame that you can not transform, isn't it, my dear? After all, you won't make a mouthful for me as you are now! Besides, it might have been interesting to learn the feeble extent of your powers!"_

_Ryukkossei snapped forward so quickly that they almost couldn't register the motion, and the monster's hot, stinking breath whistled past their stunned faces. "Ohhhhh," he hissed down upon them in mock pity. "But how can you transform, Lady Sesseika, without killing the unborn pup within you and trampling that other one under foot?" He reared back into the sky, laughing wildly at his own humor._

_Hahaue began to growl. "When I tell you, Sesshoumaru, I want you to run," she grated, trying to keep her lips from moving too much._

_He stared back up at his Mother in shock, hardly believing that she would dare to suggest such a thing. "No," he bit out vehemently. "Never!"_

_High above them, Ryukossei called down, "Very good, boy, it seems you are not so pitiful as you look." Smiling at the pair's obvious surprise that he had been able to make out every word of their brief exchange, he added, "Yes, fools, I can hear your fearful whispers. I know your pathetic thoughts. And I can assure you, Sesseika, that if that scrawny pup were to obey your command and take one single step from the 'safety' of your side, that move would be his last."_

_"Coward!" she shrieked._

_The dragon's creeping, seemingly shapeless coils flowed ever closer and he nudged his Mother's elbow gently, closing his eyes as he tried to reign in both his outrage and building fear. "Please go, Hahaue," he whispered, suddenly finding a strange sort of pleasure in the knowledge that Ryukossei could hear him. Though a cold sweat was drenching his night clothes and running down his bare chest, he would not cringe before this ugly beast. He would not run. "You can --- f-find Chichiue. Chichiue can save us from this foul thing!" He stood motionless and looked up at the demon defiantly, and waited ---_

_With a sudden sweep of his tail, Ryukossei sent him sprawling for his insolence. He flew backward and skidded across the broken slabs of the floor, stunned. There was a steady stream of blood trickling from his nose and he blinked in disbelief as those two set of evil eyes bored into him as if they could set him on fire with their gaze._

_"I SAID YOU WILL NEVER TOUCH MY SON!" Hahaue screamed, racing towards the dragon. "Sesshoumaru!" she called over her shoulder. "Listen to me now --- Get up! RUN, LIVE!!!" She was bounding in great leaps, her long tail billowing out behind her, her curved sword flashing ---_

_But Ryukossei only chuckled deeply at his enemy's words and actions. His vast bulk shifted with blinding speed, and Hahaue's charge came to an abrupt halt as she ran straight into a wall of diamond-hard scales. She fell to the floor with a feeble groan._

_"Tsk, tsk. Are you always this pathetically slow, my lady?" Ryukossei inquired without pity. "Or perhaps it is all the strain of carrying a little one?" The dragon's great talons shot out and he captured his two dazed opponents easily, dragging them unceremoniously into the air. Clutching his helpless prisoners in his powerful hands, he lumbered down towards the beach below._

_For a few long minutes, Ryukossei seemed content just to hold them, forcing them to watch as he directed furious waves of flame at what remained of the shiro. Only when the raging fires spread to the surrounding forests, did he seem to grow tired of his sport, and at last, he spoke, "Sesseika, my lady, can you guess what I am doing right now?"_

_"I can not even begin to imagine, you disgusting snake!" she seethed, snarling and struggling to free herself from the creature's iron grip._

_"I am granting you one last chance to look over these lands you hold so dear," Ryukossei replied pleasantly, ignoring her curses and thrashing. "Your time has come to an end. The death I bring is swift and certain. So, before I devour you and your son, I will remove your heads from your bodies and leave them here for your dear Inu no Taisho to find. For when he returns --- if he returns --- I wish for him to know what it means to defy me."_

_Hahaue twisted in the dragon's grasp and tried to spit at his painted face._

_The great demon's lips twitched in a bored sneer, and he merely watched as the spittle evaporated against the burning heat of his scales. There was a rush of energy and wind as the dragon prepared to spray a final volley of flame at them ---_

_Trapped in the monster's stinking palm and fighting just as desperately as his Mother, he was suddenly blinded by a searing flash of green light and, in the next instant, both Ryukossei and Hahaue were crying out in pain. The dragon's talons unexpectedly opened, and, in the next instant, they were all plunging back to the ground._

_He hit the wet sand and rolled, temporarily stunned again, his dizzy mind trying to sort out just how the hell they had managed to escape those dreadful claws. Hahaue seemed to be wasting no time with such thoughts, and was scrambling to her feet and rushing to his side again. "Hashire! Run!" she shrieked. "The cliffs!" They began another desperate sprint and he turned in surprise as she suddenly staggered and fell._

_Her movements were so strained, so uncoordinated, and only now did he realize that she was covered in blood, her skin pierced with her own poison darts. He glanced up, belatedly noticing that Ryukossei's clenching yellow talons were also coated with a fine line of quills. So, that was how they had escaped that crushing grasp. Hahaue had released her poison, but with her hands held fast at her sides and with no room to hurl her own youki, the darts had been buried in her own skin as well. He reached out to support her, marveling at her force of will, wishing she would just run --- and leave him to his fate._

_But there was no time to argue or plead. They were still surrounded. There was no where to go, and now, assailing his sensitive ears and adding to his agony, were the deafening sounds of the dragon's furious roars. He could barely even think as Ryukossei continued to writhe in pain, his slippery coils eddying and swirling all about them. An opening suddenly appeared, and he wheeled Hahaue around and charged towards it. But his mother realized his intentions instantly, and wrestled away, using all of her strength to push him through the breach instead, even as he yelled and fought her in protest._

_"I will not leave!" he shouted, turning and lashing out at the flailing dragon with his own power. He watched with satisfaction as his acid ate away some the youkai's brilliant scales. "I will not leave you!"_

_"What did I say --- amaenbou! You will do as I TELL you!" Hahaue shouted back firmly, dodging to avoid a vicious swipe from Ryukossei's claws and launching another volley of poison quills into the air._

_The dragon's massive tail smashed down again, forming a wall between them and he lost sight of her for a brief second. When he found her again, she was nimbly racing along the monster's rolling body, swinging her sword in a glittering arc. With a shriek of triumph, she brought the blade down, burying the weapon deep in Ryukossei's foul heart. The creature's four eyes blinked in dumb surprise and wonder as he gaped from her, to the ridiculously puny sword sticking out of his armored chest, and then back again. He spit one last blast of flame into the sky, heaved one last violent shudder and then crashed back into the cliff side._

_"Sesshoumaru! Look out!" Hahaue shouted, jumping out of the way as the black rock of the sea wall rained down upon them._

_Several long minutes later, when the destruction was over and the world had stopped shaking, they pulled themselves from the strewn debris, their faces black with grime. "Kono uneuneshi mimizu me!! Ryukossei is finished!" Mother's voice was hoarse with emotion, but clear and strong, even over the loud noise of the flames and sporadic shattering of a few last tumbling boulders._

_At her confident words, he staggered weakly towards her. "Is it dead? Is it really dead?" he asked, eying the fallen creature dubiously._

_Hahaue didn't reply at first and just paced in an aimless line, rubbing at her swollen belly and humming softly to herself --- or to the baby, or maybe even to him. He couldn't really tell. "Hai," she finally answered solemnly._

_For some reason, he was not satisfied, and he approached the dead dragon slowly, snapping his wrist forward one last time. His power cut deep into the creature's scales, and he watched in nervous anticipation, alert for any signs of movement._

_There was none._

_He let out a shaky, exhausted breath and sank down in the sand, hugging his knees to his chest to stop their shaking._

_After what seemed like an eternity, he heard the soft rustle of silk and he lifted his head to watch his mother as she moved to retrieve her heirloom sword. She leapt agilely back up that huge lifeless body, and bracing her booted foot against Ryukossei's tough hide, tugged back savagely to free her bloody weapon from his heart. Gods --- Hahaue was incredible, his mind clamored excitedly. To have killed this unbeatable monster who was threatening their lands and lives!_

_Such honor and bravery!_

_And he had aided her! He alone had stood boldly at her side!_

_He felt almost giddy with relief and self-satisfaction. Legends of this deed and her vast power would be whispered among all great demons for hundreds of years to come! He flopped onto his back in the sand, staring up at the stars with a wide grin._

_When he finally looked up again, it was simply to search Hahaue's stern, noble face. He just wanted to watch her now; he just wanted to memorize everything about her in that very moment._

_The sight that greeted him, however, caused his blood to freeze like ice in his veins and he wished he had only risen just one second earlier ---_

_He was desperate to block out this new nightmare world. Beyond his Mother's form he could see Ryukossei's deep wound was gone, and that his snakelike head was slowly rising. And right now, the folds of that pale, glittering throat were expanding as it prepared to spew another blast of molten fire._

_He screamed in warning --- but his cry was too late._

_Hahaue tried to react, tried to throw herself from the center of that white jet of flame, but it ripped through her side, instantly melting through her armor, flesh and bone. And he could do nothing at all._

_He could not look away._

_He could not shut out the sounds of her agony._

_He could not even slow his rapid breathing, nor calm the racing of his heart, no matter how valiantly he tried._

_The streaming firestorm faded, and Hahaue stood in numb disbelief, her fingers trembling as she hesitantly touched her wounds. Her sword was gone, as was most of the arm that wielded it. As soon as she became aware of that fact, it seemed that all that was left of her courage and will faltered, and she paled._

_He slid to her side just as her knees buckled and she collapsed. Groaning under her limp weight, he tried to drag her away. The only places left to hide were among the boulders that had fallen when the dragon had smashed into the cliffs. With no other option, he pulled her behind one of those, shielding her stunned face with his hand as Ryukossei's fire sizzled towards them again. When the blinding light and heat had passed, he opened his watering eyes and stared in renewed horror at a ragged tear in her chest. He tried to ignore the sickening smell of charred flesh and the way the edges of her wounds were still smoldering. He tried to ignore that oozing stump where her strong arm had been and the way he could hear a rattle of air escaping her lungs each and every time she sucked in a slow breath. Most of all, he tried to ignore the fact that her heart's rhythm was so slow it was nearly inaudible, and that the quick fluttering sound of the baby's heart was already gone._

_"Tada no yume da kitto yume da. Only a dream," he murmured aloud._

_With a snarl, Ryukossei had knocked away their makeshift shield and stared down upon them in wicked delight. Hahaue lifted her tired, golden eyes to the dragon's and they merely looked at one another for a long moment, facing each other in a deadly vicious silence._

_"This is your last chance to run, my Lady," Ryukossei mocked. "While you still have two legs to carry you that is ---"_

_He was just a child, no match for this creature at all, but, at those cruel words, he choked in a frenzy of rage and rose to defend his mother. But the woman was already gone. He looked up in surprise as a second shadowy figure now towered above him --- that of a massive white dog._

_"I was waiting for this," Ryukossei snarled, taking in his foe's altered form with a perverse sort of admiration. "Perhaps now I will have a 'real' fight on my hands." Hahaue's long fangs ground together, and she howled in fury. She tried to attack one last time, shuffling clumsily on her remaining paws. But the dragon simply wheeled directly towards her maimed foreleg. She struggled to turn out of the way, simply trying to protect her gravest injury, and stumbled, falling heavily unto her side._

_In the next instant, dripping jaws closed about her vulnerable throat, and her feral growls became smothered whines. Then there was the sick, wet snap of bone and then the triumphant dragon dragged her limp body the length of the beach, as blood poured from the deep gashes in her neck and breast to stain the white sand. Only when the beast was satisfied that his prey was no longer any threat, did he finally release his hold to vanish into the sky, lost among the dust and stench that rose from the clouds of flame and smoke._

_He raced towards his Mother, staring mutely at the awful spectacle. Her blood soaked the ground, flooding into gruesome little pools or covering the span of the dunes in long, gory spurts. On the cliffs above, the shiro was nothing more than splinters. The land was burning as far as his aching eyes could see. But --- but --- through all the chaos he swore he could hear her voice. Hahaue was somehow still alive and she called out to him faintly, still begging for him to flee._

_Through the haze he finally found her, and though her body was fighting to mend itself, it seemed her strength and youki were fading faster than she could heal. She had reverted to her customary form --- a beautiful, elegant woman lying broken in the dirt, the gritty, wet sand clinging to her shredded silk garments and melted armor. Sweat and blood were running down her torn throat, and her lovely face was streaked with ash. Yet still, she raised her fist and waved it at him in annoyance. "I t-thought I told you to run away, spoiled boy," she wheezed, her voice rough and unfamiliar with strain. She stared at him for one more moment of contrived anger before attempting to smile._

_He collapsed to the ground and cradled her against his chest, arranging the fluffy weight of the white fur over her shivering shoulders. "Hahaue, shinanaide! Shikkari shite! Stay with me! Hold on!!" he choked, not even recognizing his own weak voice._

_Her burned hand reached up and she gently touched the crimson stripes on his cheek. "It will be alright," she murmured. "In the hundreds of years it took for this Sesseika to rise to power and to rule, the love I had for your Father --- and all that time I struggled to hold on to what was mine --- in the end, I learned there was nothing. Nothing but you. And I am very proud of you."_

_His eyes were full of tears and he buried his head against the warm pelt surrounding her shoulders. "You should not speak," he scolded, catching her hand and squeezing her long fingers tightly. "Chichiue will be here soon. This Sesshoumaru knows it."_

_"It is too late," she answered practically. "I am not afraid of going to that other world." She pulled her hand free from his and pressed it against the curve of her belly. "I will not be lonely, you know. And --- for a true demon there is no better death than this. It is far better that my days be ended in battle --- but --- please --- I just need to know that you will live." Something above her seemed to catch her glazed eyes, and her white face became full of horror and fear. "Iya, onegai --- noooo," she moaned into the sky. "Too late." Her body trembled one last time, and then she was gone. He craned his neck, turning his head up to see what he caught her final gaze. Seeking to find what had stolen her last words from him ---_

_Almost before he knew what was happening, there was another rush and Ryukossei was upon him, the sheer weight of the wind plowing him down and churning him into the cold sand. Somehow, he managed to break free from the force, scrambling on his belly. Pulling himself to his feet, he stared up at the grinning monster and could not keep silent for all he saw were its claws wet and dripping with Hahaue's blood. With a feral scream he charged, sending every ounce of his power into his attack. The band of green acid slashed forward, winding itself around the dragon's already damaged talons._

_"Well, well, for one so damn small --- you can sting a bit," Ryukossei bit out with a callous chuckle as he inspected his burned claws. "I can only imagine what a nuisance you would have grown to become if I were to allow you to live." The beast sighed in mock-disappointment. "You certainly would have provided more of a challenge than your mother. But then we'll never really know --- will we?"_

_With that taunt, that cruel dishonor, he felt his youki flare about him. Something in his will was causing his claws to lengthen and his jaw felt far too tight. His skin suddenly felt painfully small for his frame and his heart burned with single-minded desire to rip this creature into unrecognizable pieces with great, bloody savagery. There was stretching and ripping, and he felt as if he were being pulled in a thousand different directions at once, and then --- just as unexpectedly as it started --- it stopped._

_There was nothing, no energy left to draw upon._

_He collapsed back to the soft sand, utterly exhausted, as the cool ocean waves licked at his feet. He gasped in pain. There was nothing. Nothing but one humiliating realization --- his power was not enough._

_He felt the dull, rumbling stomp of massive footsteps and weakly rolled onto his back to find the dragon looming over his prone form, both pairs of its eyes alive with glee. "So you seek to threaten me?" Ryukossei snarled. "You are in not any position to do so, pup! Not even old enough to assume your true form! How sad! Your reckless courage has only hastened your own death."_

_He tried to growl out a suitable curse, but he didn't even seem to have the power to form coherent words. An instant later, he found it didn't matter anyway for he was being dragged across the ground and into the air. Sputtering and coughing, his mouth filled with salt and sand, he fought weakly, and having no other weapons, he bit down with his teeth and clawed with his hands. His poison ran freely, and the whip of light and acid snapped at anything it could reach, growing fainter with each strike ---_

_Without really aiming, the line suddenly struck the dragon's snout and he heard a pained snort. He looked up in surprise, and laughed madly at the bright weal stretching across the beast's muzzle._

_Ryukossei's sharp claws pierced his flesh in instant retaliation. He tried to wrench away, but those barbed claws only sunk deeper, impaling him and holding him immobile._

_"Mou sonna ni okaachama ni aitaku natta no ka ne? Missing your mama already, little boy? Have no fear --- remember, she's not alone in that other world. She died with her child. Let's honor them together, shall we?"_

_The dragon tightened its grip until he was sure his lungs would burst and it lumbered to stand over Hahaue's corpse. "Should we have a little pyre??" Ryukossei asked in a sickeningly sweet and sympathetic voice. There was a sudden rush of flame, and he screamed as the dragon's fire devoured her fallen body. The flesh peeled back and raged into red coals scattered by the wind, as if she never existed ---_

_"This Sess --- I will kill you," he sobbed, still finding he could barely control his own voice._

_But Ryukkossei only smiled broadly and with a snap of his wrist the dragon had dashed him hard against the sea-cliffs, silencing him again._

_"Hush, little one," came that high, cold voice again. "I am thoroughly bored with you and --- and I am quite hungry now. Time for you to join the rest of your family, onii-chan!"_

_Ryukossei's claws shifted once more, he heard something tear, and the pain was so intense he realized he would have pleaded for death, if only he could remember how to speak at all anymore. There was another tear and, though he could not speak, he suddenly found he could scream. In the agony of his dying, he continued those screams, and, though he hated the sound of his own failure and despair ringing in his ears, he found he was unable to silence himself. Blessedly, his humiliating cries were suddenly strangled as a choking rush of his own blood filled his mouth. His body convulsed in shock and Ryukossei suddenly threw him aloft, laughing maniacally at the shame and suffering that must have been etched so deeply on his face._

_So, **HIS** death would be nothing more than a cheap game for this creature too, he mused._

_But he was past caring anymore. He was only grateful he could see the heavens again. For a seemingly endless moment, he was floating and he saw that the dark sky was still strewn with its lovely silver stars, the perfect, shining moon ---_

_**And something else too.**_

_Something was streaking across the sky. Something ghostly white and huge and --- and --- he thought he heard Chichiue crying out his name but he could not focus anymore ---_

_He was only vaguely aware that he was tumbling down towards the earth again and could sense his own soul leaving his broken body to sink off into some deeper, wider emptiness. He welcomed that awful feeling, closing his eyes as Ryukossei's cruel, yawning jaws snapped up to devour him ---_

* * *

Sesshoumaru knew in that instant that he was merely reliving the old nightmare again. For some strange reason however, he felt quite unwillingly to open his eyes, even though something in the deepest recesses in his mind warned him it was desperate that he do so --- **NOW**. Yet despite all the prickling in his subconscious, he chose to linger in his dreams, his only wish to drift back into sleep once more. Wrapped securely in the fur of his tail, he growled in protest and allowed the welcome warmth of the afternoon sun to play on his upturned face.

_The sun?_

_And wait --- he wasn't really comfortable and warm. He was cold. Damn cold!_

_Why the hell was he cold?!_

With another growl of protest, he bundled the soft, thick pile of white fur firmly under his chin and rolled onto his side only to scream out in very UNIMAGINED agony this time. His golden eyes finally flew open and he stared down in shock at his bloodied left arm. The reality of his situation and the events of the past few hours came crashing down around him and he felt a wave of revulsion as intense as the stuff of his recent nightmare.

_Just how long had he been lying here? How long had he been combating that miko's purification?_ His thoughts were lost in a sudden, mad scatter as he speculated upon the wasted hours that must have flown by as he lay in that senseless stupor.

He reached up, fist closing around the arrow protruding from his shoulder. Within seconds, it had dissolved into nothing. He swayed to his feet and quickly took back to the sky, cradling his injured arm to his chest. _So, that was a miko's true power,_ he mused. _That was what it was like to be sealed._ For a brief instant, he found himself wondering what horrors Inuyasha had dreamt about all those years he remained pinned to the Goshinboko.

_And --- and just how great a role had he played in his half-brother's most desperate visions?_

But he couldn't think of these things now. His only wish was to return to the west as quickly as possible and discover whatever had become of Rin.

* * *

Too numb to really think, Rin had simply let Aun carry them back into the west, and now, after countless hours of flight, she called an end to the day's travels before either she or the exhausted Jaken could fall from the dragon's saddle. They touched down on some craggy cliffs and wordlessly set up a hasty camp. Crouching on her knees and staring off into the distance, she was suddenly surprised as her normally gruff youkai companion threw a soft blanket over her shoulders.

"Jaken-sama," she whispered gratefully, wrapping the blanket more snugly about her. "It's alright. You can go back to our Master now. I don't want you to get into any trouble."

"Why do you think I'm here in the first place?" he snapped in irritation. "This Jaken would be in a lot **MORE** trouble if anything were to happen to you."

"That's debatable," Rin snorted, crossing her arms over her chest. "You still have time, you know."

To her surprise, the toad just patted her hand. "Just this once, this Jaken will not argue with you. Try to sleep. I've never claimed to know what is going on in his great mind, and I do not really know what just happened back there, but he --- he does favor you. Sesshoumaru-sama has changed --- so much --- perhaps more can be expected. All things ---"

"All things in time?" Rin finished for him. "Totosai said the same thing to me once --- but can time change him?" she asked longingly, digging her toes into the rough gravel of the slope. "More likely it will change me first, just as the Miko said." The girl fell into a wistful silence and quickly scanned the eastern sky.

_All those lonely miles they had covered and --- and Sesshoumaru-sama had not followed them._

She wasn't sure what that fact alone even indicated. And she couldn't decide how to really react to it either, whether she should be grateful, or seething in anger, or weeping with self-pity. The girl buried her face in her small hands. She felt as timid and unsure as a helpless fawn at the edge of an open meadow and --- and she hated herself for it.

"We should sleep. It's a long journey back to the shiro," Jaken stated, a bit more forceful with his tone this time.

"The shiro?" Rin echoed blankly.

"Well, err --- that **IS** where we're going right?" he asked worriedly, watching as deep shivers wracked her frame.

Rin rose, and moved to huddle in the crook of Aun's massive forelegs. She snuggled tightly against one of his necks for warmth and petted him gently, finding that the action was as soothing and comforting to her as much as it probably was to the dragon. "I suppose," she answered. "I haven't really been thinking about where we're going. Maybe Totosai would know."

"Totosai?!" Jaken screeched, flailing his arms wildly. "We are **NOT** getting that disrespectful, old lunatic tangled up in this anymore! I am escorting you back to the shiro! I don't know why Sesshoumaru-sama hasn't stormed into this camp already --- but he'll be here soon. Mark my words!" He scowled at the dark circles under the girl's eyes, and then gestured at her torn, filthy robe and the dusty rock-face on which they were perched. "Is this the way you want Sesshoumaru-sama to find you again? Hiding in the ash and soot? Let's go home, jo-chan."

Rin's jaw dropped open as some strange dawning of awareness and self-discovery flooded into her. "You're right, Jaken-sama," she answered quickly, her eyes lighting with a strange inner fire, as she scrambled awkwardly back to her feet. "I have to speak with him! I think --- I think I'm entitled to a full explanation!"

Jaken dropped the Nintojou with a squawk. "**An explanation?** Rin, are you mad? Ask Sesshoumaru-sama for an explanation?! That's not what I'm saying!? I just think we should go home and put this all behind us! Pretend it never happened!" At all the noise and commotion, Aun's sleepy eyes blinked open and he raised both heads in concern, whining mournfully in response to the building tension in their make-shift camp.

"Pretend it never happened?" Rin choked. "You mean let this go? I can't! Not this time!" She spun on her heel and paced as frantically as her sprained ankle would allow. She gave that up rather quickly though --- quick motion, she discovered, much like the very act of quick thinking, just hurt too damn much at this particular moment.

"Do you want to wind up dead?" Jaken stammered, watching the girl as she stared off blankly into space. He turned his back on her, dismissing her crazy words as a simple by-product of her grief. But the little human would come to her senses soon --- she always did! "Ask Sesshoumaru-sama for an explanation --- really! I don't think that's such a great idea! Toroi --- even you aren't that dumb!!" he chuckled.

"Sesshoumaru won't hurt me," she retorted, ignoring his insult. In truth, she did not really feel great confidence in her own statement, but she pressed on. "Besides, I don't fear death anyway." Her fingers traced over a few of her scars and she smiled ruefully. "I've already experienced about one of the worst you can imagine!"

Jaken shuddered once in hearty agreement, and then tried to ignore her again, hoping the raving girl would fall into sleep.

But Rin would not settle down. "I was SO stupid," she whispered aloud, slipping back into the past. During those first few days back in Sesshoumaru's care, there had been a several tense, accusing moments when she could have pressed him further, or could have renegotiated a new understanding for how she expected to be treated.

There had been moments when she could have demanded some clarification of what her true role in his life would be ---

Last time, she had been so happy to return to her Master that she had never really challenged him for throwing her away in the first place. For choosing her fate without a single thought for her wishes or decisions. "I was so, so happy just to get my old life back that I never really held him accountable for hurting me," she added a moment later with a sad laugh.

Try as he might, Jaken couldn't ignore her anymore.

"Hold h-him accountable!?"

The toad's knees gave out and he collapsed to the ground, wondering if he had really heard her correctly. "Rin --- kurutteru no ka?! Are you crazy?!" he screeched, overlarge eyes shifting back and forth in panic. "Oh no! It's too late! You HAVE spent too much time with Totosai --- you're as insane as he is now!"

The little youkai suddenly ended his building tirade with a muffled yelp. He stiffened and whirled around, racing to the cliff-side to peer down into the edges of the woods far below.

"What is it?!" Rin breathed, instantly recognizing that he was deeply afraid.

She hobbled over to join him at the ledge. Not a noise could be heard in the snowy forest stretching before them. Everything was deathly still and eerily silent in that most dreadful manner that experience had taught her meant only a demon, and not a natural predator, was stalking close at hand. Her eyes were panicked as they searched over the dark pine boughs as she half expected to them to meet with two pinpricks of golden light staring back ominously from the shadows. "He's near, isn't he? Sesshoumaru-sama is coming?"

"My senses aren't like his, you know," Jaken answered haltingly, squinting and scanning over the wintry landscape. "But something is definitely watching us."

Rin's head swung up in alarm at those words, and she swallowed, too confused and numb to speak for nearly a full minute. Jaken's next words didn't make it any easier for her either ---

"Whatever it is --- it has great power and it's been wounded." The toad banged his head against the worn shaft of the Nintojou fretfully, his mind lost in imagining what terrifying new forms of torment and persecution Sesshoumaru-sama held in store for him.

"Wounded, you say?" Rin asked hesitantly, clutching her naginata tightly in her hands as a cold fear touched her heart.

But Jaken was no longer listening to her, choosing instead to mumble neurotically to himself. "Perfect --- if it IS Sesshoumaru-sama, if he IS wounded, he'll be in a wicked temper! This Jaken had better prepare his most sincere and humble apology. Sesshoumaru-sama, Lord of the Western Earth, Skies, and Seas --- no, err, My Most Exalted Master, Ruler of All He Surveys, No!" His most wishful and desperate thoughts began to bleed into his chosen titles. "Oh, My Gracious Prince Who is Nobly Striving to Improve His Patience and Mercy In Dealing With Ungrateful, Useless Followers ---" He broke off with a pathetic whimper and rubbed his head, already envisioning it being crushed by a booted heel as Sesshoumaru-sama simply walked over him, flattening him where he stood..

Rin released the breath she had been holding and turned so abruptly that even Aun started in panic. "Oh, stop that whining, Jaken-sama!" she seethed. She picked the still babbling toad up by his collar and hefted him unto the dragon's back as if he were a sack of rice, ignoring all of his shrill protests.

She needed to get home and quickly.

Though most certainly not his intention, Jaken's words had awoken something in her blood. A wave of embarrassment washed over her as she DID vividly recall the first time she had seen Sesshoumaru after being sent away, of how she had cowered in the dirt on the floor of Totosai's forge. If that mysterious creature Jaken was sensing truly WAS her Master, she suddenly realized she had no wish to be found cringing in the dark again, just lying here helpless, awaiting his decisions and command. She pulled herself back into Aun's saddle with little difficulty despite her painfully throbbing ankle, and wrestled the reins back from her still cursing youkai companion. Clicking her tongue and jabbing with her uninjured leg, she guided the dragon back into the night wind, hurrying straight towards to the Western Lands.

Unnoticed and far below the girl, a dark figure emerged from the tree-line. Following her path through the sky with a longing gaze, it leapt through the trees in careful, patient pursuit.

* * *

The freezing rain came down in great glassy sheets and a heavy cloak of snow shrouded the garden, adorning the bare tree branches and trimming the high compound walls. The ornamental pond was covered with a thick skin of ice and the great rocks and stone cochin were blanketed under piles of white.

Side by side, Rin and Jaken walked through the imposing iron gates of the shiro, making their way slowly, steadily through the courtyard. Trembling from head to heels from the vicious cold and the exhausting pace of their flight, they finally stumbled into the great house. Too weak and exhausted to move, their joints stiff from the cold, they collapsed together on the floor of the entry way and slept.

Rin finally awoke hours later, feeling just as hollow and dead inside as she had when her eyes had drifted closed. Mechanically, she dragged herself back to her feet and gently nudged the small youkai snoring beside her. Her mouth was disgustingly dry, and so she made her way straight to the kitchens, with the yawning Jaken tripping closely at her heels.

She prepared a small, hurried meal for them to share and then ate without tasting, chewing her food slowly, as her hands glided over the old wounds on her throat. A sudden, pressing question popped into her mind and she drew back her still damp hair, exposing the complex web of shiny scars. "So --- this --- this mark means **nothing**, eh, Jaken-sama?" she asked quietly.

Jaken fidgeted nervously, clearly very embarrassed. With a sidelong glance and a sigh, he stared at her blemished flesh, focusing on one wound in particular. "Well --- s-sometimes --- a mark like that means nothing."

Rin let out an exasperated huff and slammed her hand down on the table's surface. "I'm SO sick of half-truths! I'm so sick of silence and brooding! I'm so sick of walking around like the earth is about to be ripped out from under me at any moment! Can someone give me a straight answer --- for once!?!"

Jaken pursed his lips at her shrill, sudden outburst and tapped his blunt claws together in an annoying tempo, not knowing where to begin.

"Well, sometimes a mark like that means nothing," he muttered haltingly, shifting to stare up as if deeply interested in the construction of the high ceiling. "But to the woman he'd share his life with --- to the woman he'd stay with --- of course, to her it would mean something --- but then again ---"

"I don't get it!" she shouted, throwing her hands up in frustration. "I'm NOT a demon, as you all love to remind me! Speak plainly!"

Jaken snapped back to attention and quailed under the furious gleam in her over-bright eyes. "Well, you have to try to understand, marks like that don't remain on demon woman --- it's more of a scent really! And he's been with lots of women so ---"

"How **many** women?" Rin blurted out, unable to help herself or contain the sudden storm of envy that crashed over her heart.

"I don't know!"

"I thought that was your job as 'minister' of his mighty 'empire' --- to keep track of all his conquests?!" she spat out derisively.

"I don't keep count of those kinds of conquests!" Jaken stammered. "I don't think he does either --- besides I'm sure he'd have lost track by now ---"

"Disgusting," Rin muttered, her cheeks flushing crimson in her jealously and humiliation. She quickly released her dark hair and allowed it to fall free, covering her throat and that awful mark once more. _Gods --- the miko was right. It WAS only a sign of possession, not a symbol of enduring love._

_Everything felt so different now._

Even now she could hear his words in the clearing, telling her beyond a doubt that though he had chosen to offer her his companionship and his body, he still did not deem her worthy enough to deserve his respect or his heart. _But,_ she realized,_ her final fate wasn't decided. Not yet anyway. Not until she had something to say about it._

Without another word, she pushed away from the table and marched slowly from the kitchens, leaving her pottery bowls on the table in a great cluttered heap. She dropped her sodden outer clothes absently in the halls as she passed.

Jaken trotted at Rin's heels again. Even though she walked with a pronounced limp, he could barely able to keep up with her surprisingly quick strides. His initial relief at finding himself home was fast disappearing, and he now stumbled in her wake, trying to tidy up her mess as he went, staring up at the girl in mounting concern.

Within moments, Rin had reached the door to Sesshoumaru's great room. _What did this all mean?_ she chanted over and over again, her mind still too uncooperative and numb to supply a decent answer. _Just as it had been when she first returned to the shiro, in that clearing she had been too devastated to ask the taiyoukai for the full truth. For the hundredth time she had squandered a perfect opportunity to discover his intentions!_

_So --- what would become of her now?_

_What was it that he expected from her?_

She touched the door-frame with a timid hand. "You let yourself be deceived by your own pitiful fantasies and dreams. You accepted his 'apology' for abandoning you without even realizing he **NEVER** really offered one," she half-laughed aloud, shaking her head in shame. "You are so stupid."

"Huh? What did you say?" Jaken asked behind her, his fear increasing by the second.

Rin ignored the old toad, choosing to continue with her musings in silence now. In light of her changed relationship with Sesshoumaru-sama, in light of the unexpected joy of being taken to his bed, she had just let things continue as they always had. She had been too blinded with silly notions and bashful, girlish longing --- she stared around the demon's room with a heavy scowl --- _too blinded with awful, meaningless presents!_

In a sudden flurry of excess energy, her tiny feet carried her to his large mono-oki. The girl yanked out a voluminous kimono, relieving some of her frustrations by crushing and wringing the pliant fabric in her hands. With some satisfaction, she noted that it was one of the billowing outer layers of uchiki she had worn on the night they had first made love. She flung the pretty gown onto the floor with a small noise of disgust, kicking and stomping at it until it was spread wide. She then proceeded to collect the rest of her new belongings, and deposited them onto the delicate creases of the robe, muttering angrily to herself all the while. When everything was somewhat organized into a large pile, she folded the corners of the uchiki over one another, forming a large makeshift sack. She wiped the sheen of sweat from her furrowed brow and slowly, defiantly began to drag her possessions back down the wide corridors, moving steadily towards HER old room.

Jaken stared in slack-jawed amazement as she struggled past. "What the hell are you doing?!" he squeaked, stooping low to pick up some items that had fallen from her pack along the way.

"What does it look like I'm doing?" she snapped back. The youkai hunched his shoulders at her icy tone, eerily reminded of the night his master had rifled through her belongings in much the same manner. Rin caught his frightened look and instantly regretted her outburst. "Jaken-sama," she whispered, staring blankly towards the end of the long hallway. "I plan to return to my old room --- a-and I need to ask you a small favor ---"

"You're not going to ask me to burn that? Are you? After all, that's what **HE** did the first time," Jaken mumbled fretfully. He tried to hide the Nintojou behind his back, with very little success.

"No," Rin answered sadly, suddenly reminded of all she had lost. _Gods --- it was just another thing she had dismissed from her mind! In her excitement to be back in her Master's favor, she had also neglected to mourn all those simple treasures HE had so thoughtlessly destroyed! All of those herbs and seeds and flowers and pretty seashells she had collected over the years! Even that first dainty little orange kimono he had ever provided for her! Everything she had prized, gone in an instant --- taken away callously all in one fit of HIS sour temper!_

She turned away from Jaken, trying to conceal the building resentment in her eyes, not wanting the little youkai to think any of her ire rested with him. After all, Jaken may have claimed to have accompanied her strictly for her Master's sake, but deep down she suspected there was another force behind his actions. Something that the toad would never, ever admit to feeling for her even if Sesshoumaru was threatening him with Toukijin ---

_Friendship._

Rin knelt down to his level. "Last night, Jaken-sama, you said something was following us. Well, if it was Sesshoumaru-sama, then HE knows where we are." She suddenly found it difficult to swallow. "He'll be here soon --- and I don't think YOU should be around when he arrives."

Jaken's face paled from a deep moss to a distinctly lighter shade of green. "W-what the hell are you planning to do?" he choked. "You're not still thinking like you were last night?"

Rin rose back to her full height, shrugged her shoulders and then resumed her slow march down the airy corridor, dragging the heavy bundle of gifts behind her. She suddenly noticed the bag was becoming increasingly harder to tow and she turned around in annoyance, not at all surprised to find that Jaken was tugging in the opposite direction.

"Hey! Cut it out, Jaken-sama! Yamete!" The girl wound the edges of the uchiki around her fists, pulling the small youkai off balance and dragging him across the floor. "Let go!" she yelled.

"No! **NO**!" the youkai hissed back. "This is the stupidest thing I've ever seen you do, and, believe me, I've seen you do a lot of stupid things ---"

With an exasperated sigh, Rin limped back around the pile. "I'm warning you, LET GO, Jaken-sama!" she threatened, pinching at his warty hands as she attempted to pry his claws free from the silk. She cursed most unbecomingly as only Jaken pinched back. Their building scuffle ended abruptly as they were both distracted by a sudden rustling noise and a tiny flash of white. Rin glanced up with a frightened gasp ---

But that flash of movement had been nothing more than a little piece of bleached parchment that had been blown from a stately pedestal from within the family shrine. She stepped into the room, staring mournfully at that bit of paper lying on the floor. She knew what it was in an instant, just those three shaky characters forming his name, scribbled in her weak childhood script. She found she had no desire to pick it up and restore it to the place HE had chosen.

Her hands flew instead to her armored chest, and a sudden tightness snapped through her as Totosai's words echoed in her mind. "Protect my heart, huh?" she mused aloud, still not quite used to the feeling of all that cold iron under her fingers. "So, that's what you were trying to say, Ojii-sama? Well, your gift didn't do much good."

Mechanically, she worked at the lacings at her side and removed the armor, placing the delicate band of hammered metal against the wall with the other weapons.

"I'm going to do what I SHOULD have done when I first returned to the West," she swore in a low voice, not really knowing who she was speaking to. She bent her head, hiding her face behind her bangs, as she offered a silent appeal to the heavens that she would somehow find the wisdom to work through this latest crisis. In secret, she hoped Sesshoumaru-sama's great ancestors were not ALL like him and that they wouldn't be TOO terribly offended by a simple human praying in their final resting place. Thinking suddenly of the taiyoukai's mother and of her great sacrifice, she cringed miserably. Doubtlessly, **THAT** particular member of her Master's family tree would not be aiding in her plight. Somehow, she still very much doubted such a strong and proud woman would ever accept such a lowly creature for her precious first-born son. "Anyway," she concluded with a resolution she really didn't feel. "I am going to try to question Sesshoumaru on ALL of his plans for my future. And --- if his answers aren't the ones I'm hoping for --- I --- I will be leaving."

"A-are you insane?!" Jaken squealed shrilly, breaking the peace.

"I can't live like this!" the girl shouted back, sinking down to the floor. "I can't live knowing that at any moment I might be thrown away and forgotten again!" Her sorrowful eyes drifted over the untidy piles of costly silk and riches she had so hastily gathered from his room. _Here it was --- her whole life wrapped and tied in this one messy bale. All ready for her to drag off to a very uncertain future! But, Jaken was right --- Sesshoumaru might get very angry! Or worse, maybe --- maybe he wouldn't care at all! _A chill ran down her spine and she suddenly felt as helpless as she did on that day she had been beset by wolves.

The girl and the youkai sat opposite one another in the hallway for several long minutes, too deeply lost in their own thoughts to continue their argument. As the painful silence stretched on, Jaken took a long moment to study the noisy, irritating creature who had always plagued him to no end, who now looked so small and fragile. _Yet for some unknown reason,_ he mused, _this slip of a ningen girl had managed to draw and hold his Master's fascination. She was a nothing, a scrawny little brat, a human --- but somehow she had confounded and altered the hopes and ambitions of a VERY powerful youkai lord._ He scratched a claw against his chin thoughtfully. Though Rin still flinched at the mention of Sesshoumaru-sama's name, she WAS struggling to control herself. And at the moment, though the scent of tears clung heavily about her, she sat with her spine straight and her pointy chin held high. As was usually the case, the little youkai suddenly found himself reluctantly admiring the human girl's unwavering spirit, though --- though it might FINALLY mean her death this time.

Rin looked up at the noise of sharp claws clicking against the lacquered floor.

"Fine --- I will not try to stop you," Jaken said, turning his face from her with a small snivel. "I will do as you ask, baka na ningen me. If you should need my services, I will be wisely hiding in the stables with Aun. And I'll leave room for you too, should you come to your senses and decide to hide as well."

Rin sniffed miserably, "I'm really sorry that I got you into trouble with Sesshoumaru-sama --- again."

* * *

Sesshoumaru stormed into the shiro, ignoring the shrill squeaking of the high iron gates as they rattled in the fierce ocean wind. He crossed the dark courtyard in two quick leaps and heaved the front doors open a bit more forcefully than was really necessary, causing another searing pain to arc from his fingertips to his shoulder blade. As soon as those fine doors slammed shut behind him, he tore carelessly at the bindings of his o-yorai, allowing the comforting weight of the armor to slip from his frame. It clattered to the cold floor in a messy heap. A second later, he was kicking off his boots impatiently, stooping low to throw one across the genkan in a fit of wild temper. He cast a dark smile into the shadows when he heard something crash and break, instantly locating the object that had been destroyed, even in the blackness.

Lying in a splintered pile on the polished floor were the remains of a fine porcelain vase. The ancient heirloom had been filled with those garishly bright weeds --- those --- those stupid azalea flowers. _Wonderful._

The sudden snap of silk above him drew his attention away from the broken shards and scattered petals, and he paused to glare at the high wooden rafters of the ceiling. A large tapestry billowed wildly there, caught in the untamed wind. His eyes narrowed as he stared impassively at the watery image dyed into the cloth --- just another tattered portrait of his great father in his truest form.

"Have you any wisdom to offer on my predicament, Chichiue?" he sneered at the faded likeness, trying to forget what the real man had been like. _Powerful, commanding, wise, kind, patient --- loving._ His lip curled in disgust at the bitter irony of it all. "Of course not," he laughed, deciding to answer his own mocking query. "You would not have gotten yourself into this state of affairs, would you? You had no problems spawning some mixed brat. If everything was about love --- why weren't you thus enlightened when it came to Hahaue and myself!?"

In a measured outburst of power, a green glow burst from his fingertips, followed by a thin band of light that snapped up at the image, burning through the linen ties anchoring it to the wall. He watched as the old painting was snatched up by the gale and blown to the far end of the room, drifting into a crumpled heap on the floor.

His thoughts immediately returned to center exclusively on Rin. Surely she had settled down by now. Though her eyes had been filled with such pain in the forest, she HAD returned directly to the shiro. _That meant --- something._ He had been half-expecting to have to track her down and drag her out of Totosai's forge. So her very presence here was a rather encouraging sign in itself. Perhaps the little thing was already over her momentary outburst of temper and would now be willing to listen to reason.

Without a backward glance, he proceeded down the rich hallways, bursting noisily into his room, fully prepared to confront the wayward, disobedient girl and make her understand his will. _It was fine,_ he reasoned. _It wasn't too late._ _After all, if a foul-mouthed, sputtering ass like his half-brother could make that stubborn, slow-witted miko understand his mind, surely **HE **could reason with Rin. She was such a rare and gifted little spirit and he was intelligent, rational, collected --- surely it wouldn't take much to make her understand his point of view?_

_Gods --- he just couldn't wait for this whole messy ordeal to be over._

Massaging his still throbbing arm, he padded softly across the wooden floor, turning into the far alcove and drawing back the sheer netting that sheltered the sleeping area ---

"Rin! Wake up! **Okiro!** This Sesshoumaru wishes to speak to you now!" he began, his words dying in a sudden shock.

He never got to sink to his knees or nudge gently at her sleeping form. He didn't have to tug at the rich covers to draw the girl out, she was ---

At that instant, his senses alerted him to the most embarrassing, and inexorable truth --- _she was --- **NOT** there_.

Sesshoumaru kicked at the soft nest of pillows hardly daring to believe what he was seeing. Rin was NOT here in his bed as he fully expected her to be. He stared about the room in growing astonishment, keen eyes scanning through the shadows. With a jolt, he belatedly realized not only was the girl gone --- it appeared ALL of her possessions had been removed as well! And removed rather hurriedly at that, he noted, as he picked up the shape of one impossibly tiny little sandal lying forgotten near the doorway.

But her scent was still strong. She was still here in this house and he knew exactly WHERE in an instant ---

He pounded angrily down the winding hallways turning toward her old quarters. _HIS old quarters,_ he corrected, memories of centuries past still surging fresh in his mind. A rage burned within him and he was so angry at her simple defiance that he it didn't even occur to him to simply appear in that miserable little room at will. He arrived at her door, yanked the sliding screen off its track, and stepped inside, only to crash immediately into a low dresser that had been pulled across the threshold. He hissed at this latest unexpected pain, rubbing absently at his knee, staring down in utter astonishment. The dresser, the benches and tables --- all of her fine furniture and gifts, in fact, were piled in front of the doorway to form a pitiful screen to block his path! He gaped in slack-jawed amazement, utterly dumbfounded that Rin should set up such a pitiful barricade against the likes of him. _She knew what he really was! Of all the stupid, puny defenses ---_

A slow blush crept up his throat and into his cheeks. _A stupid, puny defense --- but --- but look at who the hell had run right into it! **What was happening to him lately?!**_

"What in the name of hell!" he gritted, hoping, somewhat fervently, that the darkness concealed the embarrassed flush of color blooming on his face. "What is the meaning of this?!"

Rin merely looked up at him from her own childhood bed, and regarded him with a bland look. "Oh --- nothing, Master," she stated rather coolly. "I have merely returned to my own room." She dropped her gaze and resumed idly sketching on a roll of parchment that spread across her covers. "I have only returned to where I belong," she added under her breath, knowing full well that his sensitive ears would have no trouble picking up that casually whispered remark.

Sesshoumaru's eyes narrowed into slivers of molten gold. Though Rin's words were composed and even, her eyelids were swollen and puffy, as if she had been crying all night and all day. And, just as it had been in the forest, he could still hear that raw edge of desperation in her lilting voice. Though they had NEVER fought before, he knew in that instant that it wouldn't take much for her emotions to explode or his own temper to snap. He watched in growing horror as the girl's glance shifted back up, her gaze resting pointedly on the many items she had used to create that crude barricade before the door. "Now, please leave, my lord," she ordered, her curved eyebrows arching to disappear beneath the thick fringe of her bangs. "As you can see, you have NOT been invited."

Sesshoumaru shook his head in shock and building outrage, hardly daring to believe he heard her correctly. Bracing his palms on the fine dresser and digging in with his sharp talons for sheer spite, the taiyoukai vaulted over the ridiculously crude blockade, and stared down upon her with a look of unparalleled disbelief. "**What** did you just say to this Sesshoumaru?" he gritted.

In the next instant, her serenely vacant expression had vanished. "Rin --- said ---" she began slowly and sweetly. Her words suddenly died and her voice built to a piercing shriek. "GET OUT!" she snarled in an unfamiliar tone that was as intense and dominant as any youkai woman's. "After all, I have fulfilled my sole duty to you several times already this week! Surely, you do not require my attentions yet again, MY LORD?!"

"Do **NOT** call me that!" he barked, knocking another small table out of his path, working his way steadily towards her.

Rin threw back the quilted kaimaki and rose from bed. She couldn't help feeling absolutely stifled by the past and by the future. But --- most of all, she couldn't help feeling stifled by this --- this impossibly arrogant demon --- this impossibly arrogant demon that she adored more than anything and was now looming over her like a dark storm cloud! _Ask him what his intentions are,_ that annoying inner voice chorused in her tired mind. _Ask him what you mean to him._ As she fought to organize her next words, she allowed her eyes to travel over his body for the first time.

She was unable to muffle her frightened gasp.

Sesshoumaru's arm --- his left arm --- was a burned and bloody wreck. The once pale skin was now a lurid purple and a fine web of angry red and black wheals were woven across his flesh. Despite her anger, she couldn't hide her automatic concern and she found her eyes watering as she searched over these terrible wounds. _What could have hurt him so? Had it been the miko? _Her heart ached to comfort him, and she suddenly found herself wondering if he was in much pain, and what she could do to ease his suffering ---

_Damn you,_ shrieked some corner her mind. _Why?! Who cares how HE feels right now? What's the matter with you, you fool?!_ She shook her head to clear all the echoing voices and took a small step forward.

Sesshoumaru watched her slow approach with a wary eye. He had caught her look of reflexive fear and pity as she stared at the bloody mess of his burned arm. But in the next instant, any and all tenderness had vanished from her expression. Her shoulders were squared and she limped over to confront him, her rage seeming to build with each unsteady step she took. His dark eyebrows furrowed angrily, noting how the girl tucked her robe tighter about her frame, smoothing the material dramatically over the legs as if he had NO right to view any part of her pale skin.

"Why shouldn't I call you that, Sesshoumaru-SAMA?" she screeched. "That is your due title after all! And that's all that seems to matter to you!" She paused and leaned back against the wall, nearly out of breath. "So --- then, if the miko is correct, in the future, after the LORD of the Western Lands is finished with me at night, shall I spend my days serving the 'Lady' of the Western Lands as well? Will I be expected to mend her kimono, prepare her meals and amuse her with my stupid human follies and silly banter?"

Sesshoumaru's jaw snapped open as if he meant to answer, but Rin merely continued on, not particularly interested in his reply. _This was ALL too much! She had served him loyally for so long, she had endured his moods, his will, even his cold-hearted abandonment --- why didn't he tell her his full feelings? Why was he still leaving her with no choices!? She had never spoken like this to anyone --- least of all him --- but gods, it felt so good!_

She paced the length of her fine childhood room to stare out the window, just seeking to avoid his burning eyes. She was starting to lose focus of her carefully rehearsed argument, her questions about her future prospects being replaced by questions that betrayed her nagging jealousy and her doubts about the past. "And just who shall it be, MY LORD!?" she persisted. "Kagura perhaps? And why not --- you've already **HAD** her, after all, haven't you?"

"What are you raving about?" Sesshoumaru shouted as he raked his claws across the wall, his temper wildly out of check at her bold outburst. "Kagura?!? What?!"

"Ooooh --- I know ALL about it," Rin countered airily. "It's just another lie." She limped back across the dark room to stand before him, trying to forget how he towered over her slight form. "Ah - I'm sorry, my lord's great honor prevents him from lying," she bit out in a cynical, sing-song voice. "Is it just another fact you've chosen NOT to admit, huh!? Well, I've KNOWN all about it --- **SHE** told me everything weeks ago!"

Sesshoumaru blinked in surprise and stared down at the rampant girl in matchless confusion. _Nani? Kagura had told Rin that he had taken her --- wait --- what --- when the hell did Rin SEE Kagura?!_

Rin's cheeks grew even more flushed in her envy and wrath as she watched the confusion wash over Sesshoumaru's pale, perfect face. "Yes! I saw her --- yes! Yes! **YES**!" she cried in exasperation, stomping her bare foot on the floor, not caring that the childish action pained her swollen ankle like the fires of the deepest level of hell. "You and Kagura --- that disgusting demon! T-that disgusting, filthy demon woman who's stolen me and hurt me and handed me over to your enemies! And you t-took her anyway! She told me how you and she --- she ---"

"**Be silent this instant!**" Sesshoumaru shouted imperiously, his mind still trying to grasp the all the implications behind Rin's charge. _Sometime over the past few months, she had run across the path of the wind-sorceress? How did she escape without injury? And ---_

"WHEN the hell did you see Kagura?" he barked out. "How? Where? What did she want? And what the hell did you say to her?" His eyes were hard as he demanded too many answers at once and with one step he closed the distance between them. He seized her roughly, his claws accidentally digging into the already bruised skin of her upper arms.

Rin barely felt the pain of those sharp claws as she choked in a fit of jealous fury. All attempts to be rational and work her way back to the subject of her fate faded as quickly as summer flowers after a frost. _Just look at her great master now!_ she seethed inwardly. _He didn't care about what Kikyou had said to her! He didn't care that she was terribly hurt! He didn't care that her heart was breaking! Right now Sesshoumaru was so anxious, so damned concerned, but only about that loathsome demoness, Kagura!_

_It WAS true then!_ _Sometime after he had abandoned her, he had taken that woman! While she had been sobbing alone in the darkness of the forge, inconsolable over that fact that she had lost him from her life forever, he had been ---_

She found herself imagining the two beautiful youkai clenched in a heated, passionate embrace, the soft brush of flawless bare skin against skin, the gentle murmurs in the darkness, the --- wait! _It wouldn't be like that --- would it!?_ her mind continued to scream in bitter betrayal._ It wouldn't have been slow and sweet, but all consuming, wild and fiery! And --- oh gods --- did he --- because Kagura was like him --- a true demon --- did he give her ALL of himself in that way she would apparently never know?! _Rin doubled over and slid from Sesshoumaru's grasp. She clamped her hands tightly across her belly, fighting the urge to be violently ill.

Though still anxious to know what had taken place with the wind-witch, and **VERY** concerned that his greatest enemies might have found out about his new connection to the girl, Sesshoumaru was unable to stand Rin's pain any longer. He took another step forward, attempting to pull her into his tight embrace again. His head absolutely pounded, both from the strain of his fighting his injuries and in trying to anticipate her next move. "Rin, this Sesshou ---"

But the girl merely growled, her shoulders hunching in obvious revulsion at his touch. "Of course, Kagura's perfect for you, isn't she?! You BOTH have **NO** heart!" she cried out in disgust. He shook his fair head at her icy accusation, completely at a loss and unable to understand her rapidly shifting moods and emotions. "That is not ---" he began to state, but his words died as the girl abruptly ceased pushing him away. She was clinging to him now --- drawing him close, her cool hands winding around his nape.

"Is SHE what you really want, my lord?" Rin cooed seductively. She stumbled into his body and he jerked back in surprise. Her lithe fingers twirled around a long tendril of his hair and she yanked down harshly, pulling him to her level to kiss him passionately. He found he was unable to prevent a soft gasp from rushing past his lips as they parted in surprise to her bold actions. He was equally unable to stop the strange startled sound that was drawn from his throat at that first scrape of her tiny fingernails against the angle of his jaw.

"Is **that **what you really like?" the girl asked savagely. "I mean --- between two youkai --- is it like this? Is it better when there's no tenderness, no love?"

While Rin spoke, she continued assaulting him with violent kisses, sending waves of pleasure crashing through his weakened body. Each kiss somehow seemed more disturbing then heartening, it all felt so wrong, but fierce need raked through him, threatening to slice away all his self-control. Her pale, slender hands were stroking at him, tripling the torment as each touch forced more sounds of rough hunger from deep within his chest.

His breath caught again as Rin's kisses slowed. Ever so carefully, she took his lower lip between her white teeth, and then lightly drew her tongue across it. Almost as soon as that bold caress began, the girl retreated, leaving him with only the barest hint of her enticing taste.

Sesshoumaru's amber eyes fluttered closed in attempt to disguise his feelings of great loss. _What had he done to her? Who was this creature standing before him?_ He pushed Rin back and watched, in growing alarm, as his sweet girl flashed a bleak, unloving smile and seductively traced the tip of her tongue across her own lips, as if savoring his taste, too.

All his nerves and muscles clenched painfully, hardening his whole body as he fought against emotions that were rapidly spinning out of control. He had learned to expect many things from Rin but --- but not this ---

Her eyes seemed to be those of a stranger's and they glittered fiercely as they roamed over his body filled with a smug, disdainful fire. That cold, new smile of hers was equally unfamiliar to him, seeming nothing more than a grim slash of self-satisfaction --- as if she saw him as an enemy. An enemy who could be easily defeated and --- and then promptly forgotten. She was shaking her head as if he were something to be pitied and he could do little more then stare back in stunned silence, gasping as she brazenly licked her full lips again. As if she had tasted something sweet. As if his current state of horror, bewilderment, and pain was something delicious.

Rin reached up to him and he made another startled sound as that sweet, pink mouth brushed compellingly against his once more. With deliberate slowness she flicked the tip of her tongue across the seam of his lips, seeking entrance, and despite feeling increasingly unsure of all of her uncharacteristic shifts in behavior, the call of her willing body and its temptations were too great. Against his will, something snapped in his blood and his lips parted fully of their own accord. His breath panted in a warm rush, and his involuntary cry was silenced as she slid her tongue deeply into his mouth. She tasted him fully, and with a hoarse whimper he welcomed her invasion, offering her his own tongue with embarrassingly little resistance.

His shock and confusion continued to build as he felt Rin's small, cool hands drifting lower over his fevered skin. Her fingernails were easing from his throat, scraping downwards along his heaving chest, tracing in a straight, certain lines to his trembling hips. Her hand suddenly shifted away and the demon gasped in relief, thinking she was finally coming back to her senses. That relief proved short-lived, however, and he groaned as the girl's hand suddenly returned, her flat palm pressing forcefully against his rigid arousal. He swore he heard her mocking chuckle an instant later but could do nothing more than groan as the pressure of her hand increased, moving up and down that hardened ridge of flesh. Even dulled by layers of silk, the sensations were enough to make his blood pound as if his heart were about to burst. But it just wasn't right --- especially considering the emotional upheaval of the past few days. "Do not," he murmured. "Yamero."

"Kawaisou na Danna-sama. Oh, my poor Master," Rin sighed, as Sesshoumaru's body sagged weakly against hers, his sweaty forehead pressed against her own, his breathing harsh and irregular. "Here's one thing you can't lie about, I suppose. Your body can't lie, can it? Does it worry you --- what other youkai will say, I mean? Will they all talk about how you, too, have humiliated yourself bylusting after a human! And not even a rich, well-born hime, like your great father, or a powerful miko like your half-brother. Will they all whisper that you've fallen into disgrace over some lowly orphan? An unwantedpeasant brat?"

With a savage, strangled curse, Sesshoumaru's amber eyes flew wide and he tried to force her away again. But Rin merely grabbed his large hand and, one by one, took his fingers into her talented mouth, kissing and sucking at his fingertips passionately. "W-why are you doing this?" he hissed. "Do not ---" A strange mixture of profound sadness and blistering pleasure caused his throat to tighten suddenly and his next words were choked off as her greedy hands tugged aggressively at the long ties of his white hakama. His sensitive ears caught the soft whispering of silk, and he released a stifled moan as those fingers continued to skillfully ease the ties of his clothing free.

"Please, you don't pretend for **MY** sake any more," Rin chided in a patronizing tone that seemed a blatant imitation of his own aloof manner of speaking. "After all, it's not like I'm suddenly reminding you that I'm not worthy of your love. You've NEVER forgotten that fact, have you?" Her deft motions had opened his fine clothes enough to release him from the suddenly painful confinement of his hakama. "You still feel that way --- even now," she continued, her soft voice still as foreign as a stranger's. The girl fell into silence once more, all her concentration seemingly engaged on forcing his body into further response.

"Is this how Kagura touched you?" Rin whispered hatefully, unable to help herself. The taiyoukai released a feral growl at the fiery brush of her fingertips against his bare, heated skin, and her smile broadened. The way his hands now clenched convulsively at his sides, the helpless drive of his body against her hand was --- fascinating.

"So fine. Especially right over here," she teased, fingers dragging repeatedly over one particular spot, drawing a rising plea from him. "Koko ni? Yes, so perfect," she continued. "Just like all that pretty silk you used to blind me. Was that you wanted? Is that what love means to you?"

"S-stop," he bit out between clenched fangs, fighting to get back to his senses.

_Didn't she know what she was doing?_

But Rin continued to ignore him, pressing a quick, nipping kiss against his collarbone. A searing bolt of sensation, both from her actions and the unexpected cruelty of her words, ripped through him, and for the space of a heartbeat he balanced at his breaking point, glowing crimson staining the whites of his eyes. As it had been while he fought the miko's spell, he felt torn in pieces, but this time his body was caught between the burning need to throw her down and take her, the need to shove her away, and, fiercest of all --- the driving need to pull her close. _Some strange, insistent desire to hold her in his arms, to shelter, console and comfort her. To beg for forgiveness and ask her how he could make her happy again._ He could feel an icy sheen of sweat glazing his body as he fought to drag all these opposing feelings under control.

"Never like this," he finally bit out on a long shuddering breath. "For us --- I do not want this. Kono you ni kesshite nidou to suru na. **Never** in this way."

"You spoiled creature," Rin giggled shamelessly, her words breathed against the tensed planes of his chest, as she used her chin and lips to push his haori aside. "It's always about what you want. Perhaps, my lord, just this once, you could maybe try thinking about what I want?"

With a warning growl, he pulled away from her in revulsion. He heard Rin's low laughter and she merely reached out to recapture his retreating hand, dragging it up to her warm breast. "Aren't you going to call me Aijin, my love?" she hissed, guiding his splayed fingers under her embroidered collar to rest against her broken heart. "What's wrong, Sesshoumaru-SAMA? It can't be that I'm touching you the wrong way? After all, you've taught me only too well just what exactly you prefer." Her hazel eyes gleamed like a hawk's as they met his in unmistakable challenge, and she shifted closer, clever hands searching through the folds of his hakama once more. "You've instructed me **so **carefully --- as you always have."

Those vile, accusing words slashed through Sesshoumaru, ending the spell of seduction like nothing else could. "**ENOUGH** --- yamero!" he bellowed throatily, fully expecting the girl to cringe and recoil at the naked threat in his tone. He felt like he clung to his sanity by the slimmest margin, and he glanced down at his hips, at least somewhat grateful that he had only managed to surrender only a small drop to her practiced stroking.

But Rin still chose not to obey him, and her soft lips merely curled upwards in a cat-like smile. She gazed up at his face in malicious speculation. "Go on, my lord," she urged sweetly, only moving to increase the pace of that sensuous, dizzying glide of her hands. "After all, you don't have to worry about any hanyou offspring if you spill yourself like this."

Sesshoumaru's eyes widened in disgust and pain and before Rin could say another hurtful word his hands flew to her slight shoulders. There was a soft ripping sound as he shoved her away with unrestrained strength.

Rin's breath exploded in a sharp cry of surprise as she stumbled and fell to the hard floor. She looked up at Sesshoumaru, her face as white as the sea-salt left behind by the tides on the beach below. Her practical mind screamed that she should feel terrified and defenseless right now. But, for some reason, at that moment, even though he had struck out at her, even though he had forced her back, she had never felt more powerful or more desired. At that moment, she KNEW there was nothing in his thoughts but her. And --- at that moment --- HE was the one who was really frightened.

"A-are you hurt? Kizu tsuketa ka?" Sesshoumaru gasped, straightening his clothing as he hurried towards her, the stripes on his cheeks flushed with concern.

"Nothing you do can hurt me anymore. Not after hearing the truth," she snapped out caustically, stubbornly refusing his aid.

Sesshoumaru took a step back, hating the sudden, ruthless looks that kept snapping into her lovely hazel eyes. It wasn't supposed to be like this. He had already discovered how deeply it grieved him to see her frightened or sad, but seeing her like this, he decided --- seeing her so twisted with bitterness and fury --- was unbearable.

"So what is it to be then, Master?" the girl whispered, tucking her wild bangs behind her ear. "If not my hands, then perhaps you would prefer ---" She bit her lower lip as she crawled weakly to back to him, kneeling submissively at his feet. He called out her name as she began pressing demanding kisses up his now shaking thighs ---

He wasn't sure what wounded him more, the hostility of her callous words, or the lewdness of her response.

At that very moment, Rin felt equally disgusted with herself, even as she clung more fiercely to his body, pushing him off balance so they tumbled across her small bed. She felt the wooden frame snap beneath them, and she dragged her mouth up to his. She heard his growled protest, and in the next instant he struck out blindly again, forcing her back as they flailed in a tangle of bright red blankets, fighting to be the first to get back upright.

**"I SAID NOT LIKE THIS!"** he bellowed, reaching to straighten his clothes once more, and struggling, rather unsuccessfully, to do the same with his wounded expression.

"Gods," Rin sobbed, finally seeming to come back to her senses. "The miko was right --- I will be nothing more than a bitter whore! Please! Just go!!! I don't know what's wrong with me! This isn't me --- but I can't stop! It hurts too much! What's wrong with me?!"

"Nothing is wrong with you, Rin," he answered softly. "But you must get control of yourself now. How many times must this Sesshoumaru say it!? It can **NOT** be like this between us! You will calm down and listen --- **immediately**."

Rin fixed him with dazed eyes. "You --- you can't --- you can't tell me what to do now, my lord," she replied sadly. "You can't --- because --- you're the one who's hurting me! Don't you see? I love you, you've given me everything, I should be grateful but --- you're ripping my heart to pieces! Why can't I be good enough for you? Why did you take me if I'm not good enough for you?"

"Rin," he ordered, appearing unmoved by her passionate appeals. "You will control your ridiculous outbursts, you will listen now!"

Tears built at the corners of her eyes and without another word, she reached up and tore one of the jeweled combs from her hair to hurl it into the darkness. The precious gift struck the near wall, smashing in a shower of tangled silver chains and crushed pearls that rolled noisily across the cold floor.

At her action, Sesshoumaru's expression became positively murderous, hard, cold and evil. He shook his head in denial, and then vanished into nothingness.

Now sitting all alone in her dark room, Rin collapsed back into the broken mattress, wondering how everything had gone so wrong.

* * *

Yes, I know Rin is wildly out-of-character, but I'm going somewhere with this. Sorry this chapter is a bit jumpy at the last part but I needed to edit. I will also come back later to fix any mistakes...It's very late at night here!

* * *

Kakka surunja nee ze – don't get your panties in a twist!

Orokana musume – foolish girl

Damatte ni shiro. Samonai to, kono Sesshoumaru ga kono tsume de kisama no kuchi kara ano amai shita wo kirisakeru zo! – Be silent! Should you not, this Sesshoumaru will tear your tongue from your mouth with these claws!

Machiyagare – Wait!

Mekake – low class concubine

Suki ni shiro! – Do as you wish

Odaiji ni – Take care of yourself

Daimyo – warlord

Hahaue – Mother

Chichiue – Father

Ningen – human

Hashire – Run!

Amaenbou – spoiled child, pampered child

Kono uneuneshi mimizu me – You wriggling worm!

Tada no yume da kitto yume da – It's only a dream, it's got to be!

Hahaue, shinanaide! Shikkari shite! – Mother, don't die! Hold on!

Mou sonna ni okaachama ni aitaku natta no ka ne? – Do you miss your mother already?

Iya, onegai – no, please

Onii-chan – 'big brother'

Yamete – stop

Okiro – wake up!

Yamero – stop

Koko ni? – Right here?

Kono you ni kesshite nidou to suru na – never do that in this manner again!

Kizu tsuketa ka – Were you injured?

Kawaisou na Danna-sama – Oh my poor Master!


	24. Chapter 23

**What can I say about the long delay again? I've had some other stuff to deal with, lost something very, very important to me, life just generally being sad and evil.**

**This chapter isn't finished with being proofread yet…but I just got a bit sick and tired of staring at the thing (come on, it's been like eight months!). The earlier chapters are being fixed as well…I go back to the beginning sometimes and can't believe what a rush job I did! So think of this as a test run with getting back into the swing of things! I know it's annoying to have things constantly revised and updated, but come on…I'm a fanfic writer not an AUTHOR like so many others out there! And no, I don't just say stuff like that so people can tell me otherwise. I'm in the C/B- stage of storytelling!**

**Thank you to Notoes (you ARE a great friend!), Jane, and Mmoirai for volunteering your time to find my glaring mistakes.**

**I've also jumped on the bandwagon (late as usual) with the Deviant Art account and am slowly starting to put up these drawings I've been working on. Will put the edited story up there, too! Just take out the spaces: wicked-oni. deviantart. com **

* * *

Kakko Kara no Kioku – Memories of the Past

* * *

She had not seen her Master for three days --- three days seemed to stretch on for a thousand years.

Lost in her memories, Rin stumbled through the dead, wintry garden of the shiro, her face nothing more than a blank mask. She stared up at the bleached, fortified walls, and recalled how she had played freely within this high circle of stones during the carefree days of her childhood. Her carefree childhood, her carefree youth, those countless days of high adventure that were now nothing more than a few scattered images in her mind ---

She had felt so protected then.

Now, it seemed to her that her whole life was as barren and unfeeling as the snow all around her. She felt trampled, beaten into submission, stripped bare. Vulnerable and alone, just like the stunted grey trees that lined the dunes, all bent and withered under winter's fierce power. The young woman paused and dragged a finger against the crust of frost trimming one of the lanterns that flanked the long walkway.

She felt --- _cold_. _Empty. Dead._

Rin watched dispassionately as the ice crystals melted away under her touch.

On impulse, she decided that she simply needed to forget. But as swiftly as that one practical piece of advice came into her mind, bright images of the past coursed into her thoughts to replace it. Against her will, she made a small noise, a clipped combination of a sigh coupled with a sob.

_When was it that she surrendered her pride?_ she wondered, angry at herself for her momentary slip. _When was it that she lost such sight of her own self, her own sense of self-worth? And --- gods --- when did she become this sniveling and pathetic! _Rubbing her knuckles against her damp, reddened eyes, she fought a quick inward battle to silence herself once again.

_Forget everything._ _Yes_, that would be best.

Once again, she counseled herself, she just needed to let go of the past. When her mother and father and older brother were killed, she had been forced to move on. Back then, her very survival itself had depended on letting go. When the villagers had begun their campaign of abuse, she had learned not to question their motives and most certainly not to linger in their presence --- she simply learned to find new means to take what she needed and to get out of their way as quickly as possible. And --- and when she had first found herself abandoned by --- _HIM_ --- she had been slowly teaching herself to do the same.

Apparently, NOW the act of letting go was just going to take a little more time.

The girl let out a defeated groan.

She just needed to forget all the lazy summer nights she had spent in this sheltered garden, chasing fireflies and crickets, and watching the long-whiskered koi glide through the still waters of the ornamental pond ---

She just needed to forget all those seemingly endless hours spent wandering through the woodland trails, studying the habits of the wild creatures, from the little birds and the graceful deer, to the nervous squirrels and painted butterflies ---

She needed to forget the countless hours of picking arm-load after arm-load of brilliant flowers. All those soft crimson roses, curling white lilies, and blushing peonies --- no blossom used to escape her notice or her grasping fingers! She would find excuses to squash even the straggliest and most stubborn of weeds into her colorful bouquets! Rin balled her hand into a tight fist and spit out an unfeminine curse. Why was her mind so unfocused? Why was she ranting on and on about butterflies and flowers! She wrinkled her nose in disgust, annoyed with how quickly she had become distracted again. Truly, she was an over-sentimental idiot.

Shaking her head, she tried to hurry along the winding stone trail, only seeking to return to the house and escape from the harsh winter wind. But as she limped past the great yanagi (weeping willow) tree near the main doors, she suddenly found herself pausing, wishing that spring would hurry along so she could see it green and growing once more. At that moment she was poignantly reminded of all the times she had hidden beneath the cool screen of all those trailing leaves, just a grubby little girl with skinned knees, filthy hands, and no cares. Even now, she could remember blissfully ignoring Jaken's rude scoldings --- as she silently watched ---

_Sesshoumaru._

The distant crash of the ocean seemed to sound in time with the flood of emotions that rushed through her mind. In that moment, there was no more pretending. There was no letting go of the past, no denying the betrayal in her present and, worst of all, no avoiding the heartache and separation that seemed to be destined as part of her future ---

He did not love her. He could not love her. He was --- he was --- meant for another. A woman whose name she did not know, a woman whose face she could not see, a woman who she already despised. Rin shook her head quickly, trying to push away the pain and the truth she had already begun to accept.

After all, perhaps --- perhaps she already did know the name and face or that woman very well.

_Kagura._

Beautiful spirited Kagura.

Beautiful spirited Kagura who had stolen her once and then saved her once on a mere whim, proving that she, Rin, was nothing more than an insignificant human, a helpless pawn --- youkai's plaything. Beautiful, spirited Kagura who commanded the very wind and caused the dead to dance, a ruthless warrior with powers every bit as mysterious and formidable as Sesshoumaru-sama's. All the demoness needed to do was to break the chain tethering her to Naraku before she was free to finally join with the Lord of the Western Lands ---

Forever.

And, Rin realized mournfully, SHE might find herself doomed to watch the two of them together forever. Trapped by the strange connection forged by the Tenseiga that now ruled all of her borrowed days, imprisoned by unrequited love and the mystical tie that kept the length of her life bound to that of Sesshoumaru's --- for all time.

Rin gritted her teeth and collapsed to the cold steps. There, she wept until her heart and soul seemed even more empty and dry, and just as frozen then the world around her.

Watching from the veiled window of his room --- the room he had briefly shared with her --- Sesshoumaru turned away from the sight of her shivering form.

All those nights ago, Rin had been correct about one thing, he thought bitterly. He could not help her now ---

Not when he felt more like a forgotten ghost, a fading shadow, than a living thing.

But this terrible feeling would fade soon, of that he was sure. _And TONIGHT_, the taiyoukai planned, forcing himself to turn away from the window, tonight he would stay away from the girl yet again. He strode out of his rooms and into the silent halls, knowing full well that in making that vow he was lying to himself.

He knew he needed to confront her.

Sesshoumaru raked impatient fingers through his long bangs as he reached the back doorway. These wretched thoughts, these wretched thoughts that still weakened him --- they had to be an effect of that damn connection caused by the utterly useless Tenseiga! Rin was somehow in his soul just as surely as a piece of himself was trapped in hers. Perhaps that was why he was having such --- _difficulty_ --- in resisting her. She held him fast, drawing him in with some invisible force that seemed to be just as strong as whatever mysterious power pulled the tides back unto the beach each day.

_No, that wasn't it._ This had nothing to do with the worthless sword.

_This was all love's fault again_, he mused sourly, an acid scowl twisting his features. Only love would explain why he had allowed her to show him such disrespect. After all, no one dared to refuse him. If they did, they met with such a furious wrath and a terrible vengeance that they ---- and --- and _wait_, no one was supposed to speak to him the way she had that night!

_Gods_, he cursed inwardly, digging his sharp claws into the fine-grained magnolia door frame, _it HAD to be love_. He decided he loathed, hated and detested everything about the word, its meaning and **ALL** the awful feelings it inspired.

Sesshoumaru stepped out of the house, hunching his shoulders in the fierce wind as he debated just how to waste the long, boring hours of the afternoon. He marched down the shallow-planked stairs, his boot heels echoing hollowly behind him. Without wasting a second thought, he immediately veered away from the front gardens. Though he already knew he would have to confront Rin again, he found he was in no mood to deal so closely with her grief right now. He didn't need this new, ever-present, and cursedly annoying burden of --- _damn, was this --- could this be --- guilt_?

_No matter_, he just needed to stretch his legs and think.

And so the taiyoukai paced. He paced and considered and then paced some more.

_Love._

_Maybe this wasn't love's fault after all,_ he reasoned. After all, even though he could not bring himself to admit his feelings TO the girl, he had at least admitted them to himself. _Truly_, he loved her, but --- _but why should he have to lower himself to speak the words!_ He would not allow his need for the girl to surpass his own sense of dignity, his adherence to the code of honor and pride that all demons shared. _Well, the code of honor and dignity that most demons shared_, he revised, trying to brush away images of his Father and half-brother. What more was Rin searching for? Was this just yet another example of the idiosyncrasies of the human heart? Surely --- surely this could not be entirely his fault! He should not feel this out of sorts, should he?

He shuddered. Was it time to end this foolishness? Should he forsake this woman he loved --- again?

_The woman he loved!_ He halted at that plain admission. Why did he have to fall in love NOW? It suddenly occurred to him that he'd never sought the emotion before in any of his many, many dalliances with other demon women. But though he had never sought it, he had never really tried to avoid it either. In truth, he simply hadn't wasted the time to think about the possibility of love. After all, there were far more important pursuits to engage in --- killing, revenge, building his own mighty empire. But --- but look what had happened! When he hadn't been paying attention the most unlikely of women had stolen unawares into his heart! That thought filled him with new wonder and, quite unbidden, countless memories of the girl came pooling into mind. Behind his troubled eyes he saw Rin as a tiny child rolling in flower fields, singing songs and inventing games. He saw her as a gangly adolescent, climbing down through the tree boughs, the harsh rise of bee-stings marking her thin arms, her grin toothy and triumphant, and her fists sticky with wild honey she'd plundered from some hive. He saw Rin squealing with delight as she dragged fresh fish out of the mountain streams, her kimono hiked well past her scraped knees, her ponytail crooked as ever and plaited with trailing ribbons of ivy. He saw her as she had matured, growing bold and beautiful, thriving under his care and protection. He now recalled the obstinate young teenager, furious, blotchy and red-faced, standing on the tips of her toes to bellow down at Jaken ---

And then, of course, there was the woman she had finally become. The lovely young woman who shared his bed and surrendered the precious gift of her own virginity. He couldn't help but picture Rin as she had been on that night, laying naked and slick with sweat beneath him, so trusting, so devoted, so ready and ---

That particular memory suddenly disappeared, replaced by the vision of the girl in the very instant he had told her she would never be his bride, that she would never bear his children ---

He didn't want to picture her anymore.

_Gods_, it seemed Rin had been with him forever. She always seemed to love the thought of belonging to him! How passionately she had always responded to him! And now how passionately she denied his very possession! Not speaking, moving back to her own chambers, wandering aimlessly through the gardens and --- and avoiding him! The demon lord was suddenly reminded of the circumstances at the center of their problems, the things she wished for, the things she hoped for ---

And --- and how she had initially interfered in his battle with Naraku, how she had presumed to be his equal, how she had been prepared to trade her life for his own safety, how she had made him helpless --- _how she humbled him._ He allowed his confusion and despair to turn to blackest fury. _Well,_ he decided, the girl would never, ever humble him again. Not ever.

_Never again._

At that childish statement, some small, whining part of his mind spoke up in sudden protest, fighting to defend Rin. It pleaded with him to listen to reason, logically arguing that the girl would never truly wish to see him ashamed and dishonored. Well, not purposefully anyway ---

_Love,_ the taiyoukai thought bitterly. There was no doubt about it. It truly was the cruelest form of disease.

Sesshoumaru paced several steps forward, thinking the matter was quite close to being resolved, quite certain that some conclusion would be forthcoming. But, strangely, no new ideas came to him and he found the ONLY thing occupying his mind was that **ONE** weak declaration he couldn't imagine saying aloud, those three little words that revealed the true depth of his feelings ---.

By all the cursed and endless levels of hell --- _maybe he should just march up to Rin and say it!_

Maybe the words weren't a sigh of weakness. Maybe --- judging by the way he was dreading it so --- maybe saying them might be his bravest victory, his proudest accomplishment? The demon lord straightened impulsively, surprised to find that his hands had been shaking, and quickly came back to his senses. _What the hell was happening to him?_ His will was fading under a veil of longing, his pride crumbling under the weight of indecision, his self-confidence caving-in under an avalanche of soppy, romantic drivel. Soon he would be no better than Inuyasha himself. _How very repulsive._

As he thought, his long strides continued to lead him first to one end of the courtyard and then back to the other, but in every instant his impatient pacing was cut short sooner than he would have liked.

The iron gates and defensive walls enclosing the shiro rose up before him, the whole damn thing just looming in his way --- as if purposefully mocking him. The stones were so jagged and jumbled, and for an instant, all those sharp angles reminded him of Ryukossei's ugly yellow teeth.

_Of course,_ he suddenly reminded himself, that strange nightmare brought on by the miko's spell. Those shades of the past he had been forced to confront --- they were the real reason he was so damn shaken and upset. Those memories, those images that should have stayed long buried and forgotten --- _THEY_ had to have been the real reason he had allowed that last encounter with Rin to spin so wildly out of control.

One corner of his mouth twitched in what seemed to be the start of a small smile of relief. That smile never had the chance to grow any wider. With animal ease, the taiyoukai turned and vaulted over a tall section of the outer wall, heading towards the familiar cliff trail, welcoming the growing shadows of night and the anonymity they would bring. A shifting white haze obscured his form, setting his long hair flowing about his face and his great power built, swirling comfortably about him. A shudder of pride rippled down his spine. As always, the familiar force of his own power caused the void inside him to feel less empty, and banished a few of his more pressing doubts.

_This feeling_ --- this was all he needed. This was all he wanted, he told himself over and over ---

In the end, the only thing that mattered was power. The power to take whatever he desired, the power to destroy whatever he deemed unworthy. The power to make enemies throw down their swords and cower in terror at the mere mention of his name.

The power to keep what was his.

He decided then that he would most definitely wait a little longer before dealing with Rin. He would let her come to realize her own folly. After all, just as Hahaue had wisely instructed long ago, in declaring any of his true feelings, he would surrender too much of his own control.

That settled, Sesshoumaru stepped into the air, intent on filling his time by exploring the moonlit dunes, instead of stalking the stranger that was currently weeping in his garden --- the stranger that was masquerading as his Rin.

* * *

_Not much farther now_, Inuyasha thought as he raced along the familiar banks of a twisting river. If he hurried faster and forced the others to increase their pace, then he and his companions could all be back in the village in less than a quarter of an hour.

_Well, not all of his companions,_ he reminded himself.

Several hours ago, Sango and Miroku had split off from their group with a quiet farewell. There had been no need to ask them where they were going. They were speeding towards Mushin's temple, needing to see with their own eyes that no harm had come to their daughter. But Inuyasha knew they wouldn't be gone long. Shippou had already assured the couple that Kaisei was alright, so they had only asked for one night alone to comfort the little girl, one night alone to feel like an ordinary family, with the promise to double back and rejoin their friends at dawn.

The hanyou ducked agilely under a low branch and then leapt over the frozen creek-bed, still lost in his own thoughts. Long ago, he knew he would have pitched a healthy, barking tantrum at a delay such as this. But time had changed him and gone was the half-breed boy who was always trying to prove himself to a world of demons, always trying to find himself in a world of humans.

Of course, the monk and the taijiya would be back soon --- after all, they felt the same sense of urgency now, they all faced the same fears. Miroku and Sango **NEEDED** to return quickly, especially considering that the demon slayer was once again faced with the grim responsibility of hunting down her younger brother. In a desperate moment of self-doubt, the hanyou only wished he could reward the unspoken trust his friends were placing upon him; he hoped he could pick-up Kohaku's trail for their sakes. It shouldn't be too damn difficult of a task, he reminded himself, trying to boost his own lagging confidence. After all, now there were three youkai in their party. Surely, if he couldn't find Kohaku's scent, maybe Shippou or Kouga could. He scowled and fervently prayed it wasn't Kouga. _Damn,_ he would never hear the end of that one.

The forests grew thinner, and Inuyasha felt Kagome shiver in his arms. He wrapped her tighter in his embrace, pressing her red, wind-burned cheeks against his chest for warmth. But he knew it wasn't really the cold that set her to trembling. He couldn't help but notice that her shivers had been growing more and more violent the closer they got to their destination. He understood her reactions perfectly, though --- after all, Kagome still had questions about what secrets Naraku might have uncovered during his latest, unexpected call. And the poor girl was obviously terrified about what the answers to those questions would be.

They finally reached the shabby, scattered farms that framed the outskirts of the village and still they kept running. Soon, they were streaking through the deep-rutted track that was the main square. Villagers were forced to scurry out of their way, fleeing before them, leaping this way and that, dropping their goods and crying out in surprise. Dimly, Inuyasha heard Kaede's startled shout as they shot past her hut, crunching the old woman's winter garden underfoot in their haste. But still they did not stop, continuing the last mile of their breakneck flight towards the Bone Eater's Well ---

They could not pause now.

There was still that first, pressing discovery to make, that unknown possibility that was causing Kagome to cling to him so desperately, peering out over his arm with the eyes of a child left alone on a dark night ---

After all, there might not even be a well anymore.

_What if Naraku had ventured within and discovered its purpose?_

Inuyasha could feel a cold film of sweat break out along his spine. Over all these years, they had never truly managed to unravel the well's mystery --- _so what if that evil monster somehow did? Or what if that damn thing could be broken? What if it simply didn't want to work anymore? Then what? How did one find another hole in time?_ He tightened his grip about Kagome's shoulders, already offering her comfort should they come to realize one of their worst fears.

Up ahead Inuyasha could see even more breaks in the frozen tree-line and the brightness shining from the clearing beyond and then --- finally --- the oppressive shadow of the Goshinboko. That cold sweat gilding his back seemed to expand upwards, blooming along his neck and face, and he felt sick just looking up at the gnarled, old tree, the place that had been his prison for fifty long years. But he remained in control and kept his feelings hidden. Those feelings were quickly overtaken anyway, erased by a dizzying final rush of adrenaline and a patch of orange fluff ---

_What the --- !_ _An orange patch of fluff_! Inuyasha started in surprise as the orange fluff gave way to a shifting blue comet, a comet that trailed sparks and steam and all the whistling noise of a spent firework.

_Fucking kitsune-bi._

It was Shippou, of course, darting forward to his left, circling outwards to disappear back into the woods. The young fox was charging out to flank any enemies that might be laying in ambush, just like he'd taught him over all the years. _Clever kid,_ Inuyasha thought with grudging pride. _Guess the little brat had been paying attention to him all along!_

_Okay, so one ally was in position, but where the hell was the other one?_ Out of the corner of his eye, Inuyasha quickly caught sight of a glowing green whirlwind. A glowing green whirlwind that was advancing menacingly upon him, churning up the snow drifts and snapping the boughs from the tree-tops and showing absolutely NO signs of slowing. Cursing angrily, he wound his arms tighter about Kagome's shaking form and prepared to dodge out of the way. Though it wounded him to yield to the wolf, he would not put his mate or his child into jeopardy over something as pointless as his own pride. Just as he was about to spring, and only at the **LAST **possible second before impact, did the vortex finally fade, scattering to the four winds. In the next instant, the ookami prince spun free, spiraling easily down to his side. Kouga's fists were raised, his knuckles clenched, his deadly claws flexed and held ready. His expression was positively feral, with a wolf's leer set so strangely in a man's face. The youkai was snarling, ready to take on anything they might encounter ---

It was worse than Inuyasha imagined.

Like the pages of a scroll, the little clearing told its tale, painted not in ink but in blood and shouki. The blackened patch of charred earth around the Goshinboko spoke of torture, swift, merciless and terrible. Whole sections of its bark had been peeled away, striped bare by the slash of steel or the touch of poisonous miasma. The dry, yellow grass straining up under the snow trembled in the breeze much as Kagome had trembled in his arms, and wore a garish crimson stain that could only be blood.

Inuyasha brought his fist up to his nose, still revolted by that rusty odor and the smell of lingering terror and pain that always accompanied it. He hated the foul taste of human blood on the air, ever so much more when it was like this --- when it was the blood of a friend and ally. The stink seemed to coat his tongue and sink into his pores and get trapped in the tendrils of his long hair, making him want to fall to his knees and retch. But he remained composed --- he had to.

The hanyou eased to a slow jog before coming to a halt, his ego returning a bit to force him to hold his breath and keep from panting (or, ten thousand times more humiliating, to keep from vomiting) in front of Kouga. The wolf drew to a stop alongside him. "Damn," Kouga gasped, leaning over and bracing his hands on his knees. Despite the situation, Inuyasha fought to contain his sudden glee. It appeared Kouga was just as winded as he himself was. And apparently just as unsuccessful at trying to hide it! The wolf's eyes were clamped into tight black lines, and his nostrils were flaring rapidly to pull in any breath, when it was quite obvious he just wished to open his big mouth and suck in great gulps of air. It was also quite clear, judging by the look of disgust that was plastered on his face, that the ookami was also not having much luck in disguising the fact that his senses were overwhelmed by the carnage, too.

At that moment, Kouga noticed the half-demon's keen gaze and turned his head, trying to conceal his flushed face behind the jet of dark hair cascading from his long ponytail. As the wolf fought to recover both his breath and his lurching stomach, his frosty eyes came to focus upon a particularly wide swath of gore as it trailed across the snowy ground. "How could that kid even move after taking a wound like that?" he exclaimed in a tone that was, as usual, absent of any trace of tact. "I didn't think a human even had that much blood in 'em!"

Inuyasha scowled at his old rival, inwardly cursing the loathsome creature's abysmal lack of delicacy. He prepared to let a rude comment fly, a rather cunning one, in fact, attacking not only the wolf but whatever poor ookami demoness suffered the misfortune of spawning so brainless a creature as well. But he never gotten a chance to deliver his insult for another voice quickly interrupted ---

"Jewel shards," Kagome whispered, surprising them all with her calm, matter-of-fact tone. "Kohaku must have been given jewel shards. I can still feel them --- sort of." The miko trailed off, sounding so very lost and confused.

"**Sort of!** What do you mean?" Inuyasha asked, his own words coming out in a pitch that was a bit harsher than he intended. He leaned back on his heels, awaiting Kagome's prompt reply. But the priestess did not answer, and merely shifted uneasily in his arms, staring at the fringe of the clearing with empty eyes. Inuyasha cleared his throat, trying to prompt the girl to speak. He gasped in surprise (and no small amount of annoyance) as Kagome merely continued to ignore him. First, she fidgeted with the zipper of her winter coat, and then she chewed her lip nervously, and then became far too fascinated with brushing the fallen snow off her own knees! _What the hell!_

Kagome shook her head and fought to compose her words, not knowing if she could answer Inuyasha's question, even if she really wanted to. "Well, jewel shards still feel so strange to me, but I think I can sense them --- moving." She could hardly breathe as she pointed one shaky hand to the west, her other hand now pressed tightly to her heart. "That way ---I think," she concluded sheepishly.

Inuyasha arched a dark eyebrow as he searched her face._ Awwww, he didn't need this shit now! He didn't need her getting all girlish and secretive! It looked like Kagome was hiding something from him --- something important! So, what was happening? What was going on with the jewel shards?_ She had mentioned having the same difficulty in the north, complaining that the jewel somehow felt different to her. _What was it --- could she NOT sense the Shikon no Tama properly anymore?_ Inuyasha frowned, suddenly remembering something Kikyou had once told him so very long ago. It had been such a simple statement, just another item she had casually added to the long list of reasons he should give up his youkai blood to become fully human. At the time he had merely discounted her words, believing them nothing more than silly human superstition ---

_Did you ever notice that there are so few hanyou, Inuyasha?_ she had whispered so very ominously. _Have you never wondered why so few are born?_

He shook his head to clear the miko's lingering voice. _Damn_, even when he and Kikyou were supposed to have been so lost in their love for one another, her tone had always been so solemn, so sad. Like she somehow already knew they were doomed from the start. He remembered now that he had stammered out an uneasy guess to her query. Well, actually --- he amended --- it hadn't really been a guess.

_Not entirely._

After all, for years, both demons and humans alike had been taunting him with that very same accusation, that very same heart-wrenching charge. It was a claim he had originally ignored as a rival's last ditch effort to make him suffer, to make him feel even more lowly and miserable than he already did. It was a claim that was always silenced by his claws ripping through flesh and bone, rendering his foolish opponent into a heap that resembled nothing more than a pile of wet, bloody rags. _But --- could that be it though? _Inuyasha wondered, staring down at Kagome's flaring belly. _Was the hanyou baby inside her interfering with her holy powers? _Or worse, just as Kikyou had finally suggested, was the youki in his growing child tearing at Kagome from within, pulling at and feeding off her fragile human soul?

At that very moment, Kagome inclined her chin, tilting her head up to finally notice his brooding expression. Having no knowledge of his true worries or his newly awoken suspicions, she seemed to take his dark look of fear as one of anger and annoyance. In the next instant, she had shot him a warning look of her own, and Inuyasha fell back a step, one hated word ringing over and over again in his mind. _Oh, fuck_, he cursed to himself, just how many centuries would it take before he forgot the confining weight and the sharp pull of those stupid prayer beads!

Kagome felt the stiffening of the hanyou's spine and the instant snap of tension in his forearms. As if he were mentally preparing himself for a rude, face-first introduction with the frozen ground. But he needn't worry. After all, that particular punishment was just another part of his past. To demonstrate that fact and calm him down, she ran her fingers across the oily black beads now encircling her own neck. As he watched her wind the loathsome necklace around her pinkie, Inuyasha let out an audible sigh of relief and seemed to relax a bit, that strange, tight expression vanishing from his face.

Still convinced that Kagome was not being entirely honest with him, Inuyasha forced a scowl at the girl. She was looking up at him now, studying him closely even as he stared back, just trying to interpret the confusion in her voice. _Why was she this uncertain?_ he puzzled. _Could Kikyou have been right? Could Kagome really be having trouble using her powers? Or worse, could she really be sick and in danger?_ He watched as the miko's eyes flashed away for an instant, darting over to the dry well. Inuyasha smiled patiently, years spent at her side teaching him how to interpret her silent messages as if she had spoken aloud. No doubt about it, he thought, Kagome was urging him to find what he was looking for, to hurry up and come away with her.

_Now. Right NOW. THIS INSTANT._

He turned his chin to hide his grim smile. She needed him --- she needed his help to investigate the well, that weather-worn pile of ancient timbers that was her one link to her future and her family. And she didn't want to do it alone. She was still obviously terrified of what she might find on the other side. Well, so was he for that matter.

With a sigh, he set the priestess down on her feet, trying to ignore the girl's fearful gaze. He paced away, joining Shippou and Kouga at the base of the Goshinboku. Together, they moved to focus exclusively on the tracks surrounding the old tree, the tracks and the shifting layers of scents still hovering heavy in the air. The scent of Naraku's power was definitely the strongest and Inuyasha could not contain his loud, instinctive growl. It seemed Naraku had done nothing to mask his presence and the hanyou grimly wondered what this new arrogance could possibly mean. _What did that wicked bastard have in store for him this time? What next?_ He tried not to dwell upon those thoughts, simply turning all of his attention back to the torn ground. Besides recognizing the presence of his greatest enemy, he could also sense that one of his minions had been here, too. There was a subtle shift in the auras that clung to the clearing, a slight change in scents that clearly indicated --- _Hakudoushi._

Inuyasha was only dimly aware that Kouga begun to echo his own growl and that Shippou was dabbing at his emerald eyes, his fiery head hung in sadness. He still couldn't believe that any of this was even really happening. After months and months of peace he had somehow stumbled back into the same old nightmare. _How could he have been so damn blind?_

"So, what do you think, yase ookami?" Inuyasha asked impatiently. Even as the words left his mouth he realized he was not particularly interested in learning the wolf's assessment: he just wanted to dispel some of the eerie quiet in the clearing.

Kouga's growl more grew a few decibels in volume and doubled in intensity in response to the hanyou's quick slur. "Well, it's pretty damn obvious, don't you think?" He sneezed in disgust, wiping the back of his hand clean on the Goshinboko. "Naraku's stench is everywhere --- and if that ain't bad enough, this whole place reeks of **you**, too! Forget scents, mutt, I'm looking tracks!"

Shippou listened to the exchange with growing annoyance. He rolled over-bright eyes and threw his hands in the air in exasperation, wondering if he had the strength to break up the pair should an impromptu wrestling match break out. "Honestly --- I've grown up, why can't everyone else do the same!" he complained.

Standing a safe distant away, Kagome watched as the curious spectacle continued to unfold. Marginally embarrassed by Shippou's small quip, the youkai concluded their argument before it ever really even started, and then spread out to search. Soon the strange assortment of dog demons were all sniffing at the air and pawing at the ground in a manner she still found most uncanny and strange. A quick image of puppies playing in the park near her old schoolyard flashed through her mind and if the situation weren't so grave, she might have even laughed aloud.

It would seem that there was much for them to make of the jumbled tracks scattered about the clearing and for that she was truly grateful. She waited, feeling a small stirring of hope, as the trio studied the dirt, and scratched at the ash beneath, whispering to one another, occasionally trading insults as they began to form some kind of order to the assault.

Inuyasha was the first to report his conclusions out loud. "Poor kid," he breathed, nudging Kouga out of his path with a grunt of disgust. "Got cornered by the two of them. Never even had a chance. But he tried to fight --- here, look at this." The hanyou poked at the ground with a broken twig, stirring something metallic out of the burned earth. The object came free easily and he turned it over and over in his hand. It was a throwing star, twisted and cracked, its iron dulled to a chalky grey from age and use. "Yeah," he mumbled, shaking his bangs out of his eyes and tossing the weapon over for Kouga to inspect. "Even though he was outnumbered and overpowered, Kohaku most definitely did not surrender without a fight. The poor bastard."

Kouga said nothing but merely stared down at the damaged weapon cupped in his hands. The star might have been small but it was wickedly lethal. _Well_, the wolf corrected, _wickedly lethal to a human opponent, but most certainly not to a youkai._ Though the star's use in battle would most likely take an attacker by surprise and cause a searing flash of pain, it was simply not enough to bring down anything but the weakest of demons. Most of them healed too damn fast!

_Yes_, he knew ALL about this type of weapon. For so many years now he had been tasked with protecting his pack, charged with defending his comrades, his mate and his children. Every so often the ningen villages in his province would hire mercenaries, thieves or rogue exterminators to try to drive his clan out of the mountain passes. Having faced such foes in battle on far too many occasions to count, he knew firsthand that this kind of weapon was nothing more than a last resort in a slayer's arsenal. Its use in a fight with a youkai was nothing more than the final, hopeless effort of a warrior who already knew he was soundly defeated! That kid Kohaku must have been REALLY desperate if he tried to use so pathetic a thing on a creature as powerful as Naraku! Kouga sniffed at the star gingerly, his belly churning and his face turning in instant revulsion. "Well, I'll be damned. Your friend got one of them --- Hakudoushi, by the scent of it. Wherever that creepy little bastard is, he's bleeding good. Heh. That'll piss him off! And at least that slayer woman you travel with will find some comfort in the fact that her brother fought and didn't betray you guys on purpose," he concluded sadly.

Inuyasha snorted his agreement back at the wolf and brushed his soot-covered palms on his hakama. Standing quickly, he let the breeze wash his face with the cold breath of winter. Nose twitching, he searched the wind for Kohaku's scent, hoping the course the boy had taken would give him some insight into Naraku's next scheme ---

A deep scowl spread across his features. _**Westward?**_ Kagome hadn't seemed all that confident when she pointed out the direction of the jewel shards, but ---_ damn it --- she was right! _Kohaku was heading west.

Inuyasha was only dimly aware that Shippou and Kouga had begun a dispute over who had drawn first blood in the fight, the demon slayer or the demon. He ignored the pair, refusing to be distracted from his own thoughts.

_Yes,_ Hakudoushi had been here, he restated in his mind, and, yes, that little son of a bitch HAD been wounded. It wasn't just Kohaku's blood staining the clearing. The evil little youkai would be murderously angry, and --- and now, by the scent of things, it looked like he, too, had set out after Kohaku. But Hakudoushi was obviously not hunting the taijiya down to finish their match or restore his damaged pride. Hakudoushi's pace was too slow, too measured, too careful --- as if he was keeping his very presence hidden from the boy he was following.

_Why? Why? WHY?_

A sudden shadow swooped overhead and Inuyasha whirled around to face the new threat. He quickly discovered there was no threat, for the shadow turned out to be nothing more than a large crow drifting in lazy circles above the Goshinboko. The crow cawed down at him in loud protest, obviously angry that the clearing was being so rudely disturbed. Inuyasha wasn't normally superstitious, but even he had to admit that black silhouette hovering above his head wasn't the best of omens. Biting his lip with a sharp fang, the hanyou ignored the noisy bird, and glanced at his still arguing companions. He let the sound of their bickering fade along with the crow's impatient calls, crossing his arms into his sleeves and turning to watch the clouds gathering in the western skies.

The peaks of the distant hills were already capped with a gray blanket of a freezing rain showers. A heavy fog clung to the tree tops, the thick trail of vapor making everything seem positively ---_ ghostly_. But even through the dense fog, even over the great distance, the half-demon found what he was looking for. Almost immediately, his keen eyes settled on a set of footprints captured in the melting snow. His narrowed gaze followed the tracks as they disappeared, fading directly into the woods. Much to his surprise, he found them again moments later, picking the tell-tale marks up on the next snow covered rise. It wasn't too hard, he mumbled to himself --- after all, they were moving in a straight line.

Inuyasha blinked in confusion, almost doubting the scene before him. He rubbed his knuckles against his disbelieving eyes, half-expecting the vision to fade. _Huh! The tracks! _They WERE straight as an arrow shot from Kagome's bow! There was no zig-zagging, no meandering, no sudden switch backs to throw off a pursuer. Kohaku knew where he was going and he --- and he was in a damn hurry to get there.

_Wait a minute._

Standing there, Inuyasha tried to piece everything together as quickly as possible:

_One_ – last week Kohaku had been just another companion. Now he had returned to being just another deadly enemy, and all the more lethal because of the trust they had bestowed upon him and the countless secrets they had shared. The boy had run --- no, the boy had sprinted --- from this clearing, apparently quite eager to do his new master's bidding.

_Two_ – Hakudoushi, though keeping his distance, was trailing ever so patiently in Kohaku's wake. He was biding his time, poised for the strike, just like a viper looming over an unsuspecting mouse.

_Three_ - true to form, Naraku had simply strolled away, his presence vanishing after a few teasing steps. He had disappeared into nothingness, melting into the night, quite confident that his latest plan was successfully set in motion.

It was SO clear in the hanyou's mind --- the jaws of the trap had been baited. Kohaku and Hakudoushi HAD both been given their orders. They both had a purpose. Naraku had dispatched his servants, sent them on some devious new mission, and that mission WAS leading them westward.

For some reason that thought alone filled Inuyasha with a deep sense of foreboding and an icy chill of fated-ness. He tried to swallow but found his mouth had gone far too dry.

The west. _Why, why, why would they go THAT way?_ he chanted in his thoughts. _After all, what about --- what about --- the north!_ That canyon they had just visited in Kouga's lands, that awful hole in the earth that looked like it might even extend all the way into hell itself --- that had to be a new stronghold of some kind! _So why didn't Naraku and ALL of his minions return up there! What was it in the west that held Naraku's interest?_

One very possible answer dawned on him with shocking clarity. "It fucking can't be," he stated aloud, earning more than a few puzzled looks from the rest of his companions as they stopped their fighting to stare at him.

But Inuyasha paid them no mind and merely walked to the edge of the clearing. He stared down at the tracks again, at footprints trailing away, racing towards the promise of much, much more violence to come. His puzzled gaze drifted back to the distant hills, and in his mind he suddenly conjured a place of magnificent emerald mountains, of cool, towering forests teeming with game, of pearly clouds and lush, sweeping valleys ---

It was a place he'd traveled to only once in his youth.

Only once and then **never** again.

But though the years of his life had been long and his time THERE painfully brief, he could never forget the memory of its splendor. It had been burned deeply within his mind, haunting both his dreams and nightmares alike. Behind his golden eyes that clear picture of the wondrous beauty of the Western Lands continued to form. Inuyasha suddenly remembered a white fortress, rising so proudly from tide-worn cliffs, its banners and silks tossed by the wind, the setting sun glowing upon its tiled arches. He remembered a wide silver beach lined with great black stones and the bright unnamed sea stretching out beyond it ---

Inuyasha clamped a fist against his temple, wishing the visions would fade. But the dull ache in his head only seemed to grow, pounding in unison with the drum of his heart, and with each second that passed new memories continued to spring forth. _Yes_, there had been a proud fortress and a wide beach and a seemingly endless sea, but there had also been a tall, stately demon. A tall, stately demon, standing before him as he walked hand-in-hand with his frightened mother. A tall, stately demon that moved --- ever so slowly, ever so elegantly --- to block the stone path leading to a cool garden and the warm promise of home and security. A tall, stately demon whose costly white robes could not compare to the flowing silk of his hair, a demon whose scent was a strange blend of magnolia blossoms and bitterness. A demon who was unmistakably outfitted for battle, waiting, just staring down a long, narrow nose at them, marking their timid approach with eyes that were the same polished amber as his own. Now he remembered how those eyes had bled to crimson, a shade darker and more liquid than spilled blood. The fire contained within those eyes had burned him, seared him with their terrible heat and hatred. They had scorched the last trace of innocence from his childhood, a childhood that had already been so lonely, so empty. All at once, he could hear it all clamoring in his mind again --- the savage snarls and the high-pitched screams, his mother's tears and her pleas for mercy, the acid sting of claws and the sharp bite of the whip. And those words --- those words in that rich, terrifying and wholly detached voice ---

_Whore and --- and filthy hanyou. Lowly half-breed._

Inuyasha squeezed his eyes shut. His skin felt too tight, his fangs were clenched and his jaw ached terribly. But in his heart he felt nothing now --- nothing but vengeful anticipation and more than a little dread. It was ever like this, he reminded himself, trying to calm down and fighting to draw in a deep breath. Throughout his life all of his visions and memories had been sullied, all of them ruined in the whisper of one name. It was the name of the creature that had driven him away, the name of the creature who had forever despised him ---

"**Sesshoumaru**," he breathed. "I think --- I think Naraku is going after Sesshoumaru."

* * *

Five minutes and five hundred years later, Inuyasha and Kagome made the slow climb out of the Bone Eater's Well and into her family's shrine. Though the age-worn planks of the well had been charred by noxious miasma, Naraku's scent had faded away as soon as they had leapt into its depths, the stench disappearing entirely just as they were engulfed in the eerie blue light that signaled they had fallen across the boundary of time.

Even though Inuyasha had assured her the very second Naraku's scent had vanished, Kagome still thought the shrine still felt --- tainted --- somehow. The air felt cold and oppressive to her, and never before had the place seemed more haunted, as if it were truly ruled by ghosts and darkness. But the priestess didn't have time to dwell on her feelings for all at once her mate was extending his hand to help her lever herself (and her ever widening belly) over the ledge of the well.

Together, Inuyasha and Kagome made their way out of the dusty shrine and scurried across the concrete courtyard to the main house. They raced past the Goshinboko, standing so menacingly, with its winter-thin branches looking as dead and neglected here as they did in the Sengoku Jidai. They sprinted by Mama's small garden, now full of nothing but the dried up forms of last summer's flowers. They passed it without giving it so much as a second glance. Finally, they came to a halt on the terrace, staring breathlessly at the sliding glass doors that led into the kitchen.

"**Mama!"** Kagome shouted, simultaneously attempting to wrench the door open. But the door proved to be locked from the inside and would not budge, and, if not for the clawed hand that snapped out to brace her, the young miko would have fallen directly onto her backside. Feeling more than a little bit shaken, and a trifle embarrassed, too, Kagome paused to exchange a worried glanced with the half-demon at her side.

The Higarashi family's door --- _her door_ --- was never locked.

And not only was the door locked, but she suddenly became aware that the curtains --- _ALL of the curtains_ --- were drawn tightly about the windows in a very unusual way. It looked like not even the smallest sliver of sunlight could get past them.

Hopelessly, Kagome tugged on the sliding door again, almost as if she believed there had to have been some mistake in her first attempt to throw it wide. When it still failed to open she called out for her mother once more, this time much louder. When that yielded no results, she shouted for her grandfather instead, beating on the glass with her fist for good measure. The noise only seemed to echo back hollowly --- as if the entire house had been gutted from within. Kagome cursed and stomped her foot impatiently. As with the curtains, the blinds had been drawn tightly against the door. But the young miko suddenly noticed there was the smallest a crack in the corner and though she could see a little beyond it, it was enough to let her know that the house was unnaturally dark. Kagome pressed her face tightly to the glass, knowing full well that she looked like a squashed-cheek, chibi little troll doll, but she was past caring and desperate to know what was going on. From her angle she could peek down the main hall, seeing just a small bit of the living room and the lower corner of the family portrait that hung on the wall.

There was nothing. No movement.

_Geez, don't panic!_ she scolded herself. Mama could be out --- shopping --- but --- but she always left such cute little notes tacked to the well-house door whenever she went on an errand! And --- and never mind that --- Jii-chan was always home these days! Grumbly old man couldn't be away from the shrine for five seconds any more! Souta's absence she could understand, after all he had just started his first semester of college in the fall --- but still ---

_What if something had happened? What if Kohaku had told Naraku about the well's strange powers? What if Naraku was able to come through?_

Kagome felt a sudden wild frenzy to get into the house --- _**NOW**_. She kicked petulantly at the door, giving an instant yelp of pain and cursing her own stupid action. She turned to Inuyasha for help. He was just standing there, staring down at her, looking at her as if she'd gone mad.

"Hey, can you --- can you --- I mean, break it down or something!" she pleaded, not understanding how he could remain so relaxed in this situation. This was too bizarre and she was growing more frantic by the minute. "You know as well as I that this isn't like my family!" she shouted, waving her arms for emphasis. "What if you're wrong? What if HE was here?" To her surprise, Inuyasha didn't even react to her not so subtle reminder about Naraku, nor did he immediately comply with her raving requests. He just stood there, watching her thoughtfully, his lips pursed in concentration. Then, without a word, he turned and walked away, marching towards the little storage shed. "Inuyasha," the miko called out shrilly to his retreating back. "Do something! Wait --- where are you going? What are you waiting for? Break this door down, will you!" She sunk to her knees in fear, confused by his complacency and silence, not understanding why he simply didn't shatter the glass with his fist or rip a hole in the masonry with the Kaze no Kizu!

At that very moment, Kagome suddenly noticed that the window above the kitchen sink was hanging slightly ajar and felt very, very, very --- stupid.

Inuyasha disappeared into the shed and reemerged just a quickly, humming a light tune and carrying a large wooden crate in his hands. He reached her side and up-ended the crate, spilling its contents (an assortment of rather pungent dried radishes and himono) unceremoniously onto the ground. Throwing his miko a pointed look, he eased the little window open a bit further with a claw, squeezing his nimble fingers into the widening crack. The window came open with a pop and, still humming, the half-demon stepped up onto the box, swinging a long leg over the sill. He met a very embarrassed Kagome at the now unlocked door a moment later, wearing the naked blade of the Tetsusaiga slung over his shoulder and a rather sarcastic grin on his face. "Sometimes even I know when situations call for practical thinking and delicacy, **Kaa --- go --- _meee_**," he sang out, riling her further. But in the instant the young priestess charged across the threshold, he became deadly serious again --- the time for teasing was abruptly over.

Now that they were both inside, they discovered that the terrible stillness only continued to creep throughout the whole house. The kitchen seemed so empty and small, and was not entirely clean. Little siftings of flour were spread all across the table, blown into odd patterns from the draft coming from the window. The sink was overflowing with all manner of plates and pans, while the counters were covered with bags of groceries that had yet to be put away.

Inuyasha frowned. It was not like Kagome's mother to be so untidy. Now HE was starting to get a little worried.

The hanyou listened closely, ears pricked forward and straining to pick up the smallest noise. He filtered the annoying buzz of distant traffic out of his mind and tried to ignore the echoing sounds of the dripping faucet as it ticked away agonizingly long minutes. Beneath all that he could make out the quickened thud of Kagome's heart and beyond --- now he could hear --- the barest scratching and scraping. A sharp scratching, he thought --- like an insect. And it was coming from --- the living room.

Kagome was suddenly at his side again, clinging to his shoulder. "Mama? Jii-chan?" she out called, her tone tentative and shaky, her face growing increasingly pale.

But still no one answered.

They moved down through the darkened hall with their weapons drawn, fanning out when they finally reached the living room. As Inuyasha charged into the room, diving for cover behind a bookshelf, Kagome tried to squeeze herself behind the grandfather clock. The hanyou stared back at her in patent disbelief, rolling his eyes at the fact that her belly was sticking out far beyond her chosen hiding spot. Kagome caught his look and shrugged, throwing him a sheepish grin of apology. It wasn't her fault that she needed more space to conceal herself these days, after all, if memory served her correctly HE had played a clear roll in getting her into her 'present condition' too!

Inuyasha suddenly looked as if he had sighted something of great interest. He mouthed frantic instructions that she could not quite understand and pointed furiously with a long claw. Kagome squinted in the direction he had indicated and then, she saw it, too. Behind the old couch, a dark shadow was steadily moving. Something or someone was trying to stay hidden. Her eyes narrowed and she nodded in unspoken agreement, watching as the half-demon readjusted his grip on the Tetsusaiga, drawing the sword over his head as he began a countdown. Kagome sucked in a calming breath and slowly, soundlessly drew back upon her bow, waiting for his lips to silently shape the number 'san' (three).

**"SURPRISE!"** Mama, Jii-chan and Souta all shouted in unison, as they exploded up from behind the couch.

Many things happened at once.

Kagome shrieked and knocked into the clock, sending the antique to the floor in an explosion of mahogany, gold chains and greasy gears. The clock chimed out one last discordant toll and then was silent forever.

The Tetsusaiga went whistling through the air, coming to a stop with a noisy thunk as it pierced the wall above the mantle. There it hung, vibrating from the force of its impact like some musical instrument badly out of tune.

Inuyasha lay sprawled on his back, growling from the rug where he had fallen after tripping backwards over the ottoman. His bare feet stuck up at odd angles over the upholstery, poking into the air. He alternated his snarls with moans, curses, and a few loud complaints of grievous injury, but it would appear the only real damage he'd sustained was to his pride.

"Oh dear," Mama whispered, pressing a tight fist to her mouth as she surveyed the chaos that was formally her well-appointed living room.

"My goodness, you people sure are jumpy!" Jii-chan added airily, shuffling forward. With an obnoxious cackle of laughter, he jabbed his wooden cane at the downed hanyou's ears.

"You see, Mama, I **told **you a surprise was a bad idea!" Souta concluded. He hurried to Inuyasha's aid, herding his grandfather away from the hanyou before the limits of his notoriously short temper were reached. With a soft chuckle, he extended a hand to pull the upside down youkai right-side up again.

Inuyasha reluctantly accepted his 'rescue', muttering with embarrassment. Sometimes, he thought as he allowed Souta to drag him back to his unsteady feet, sometimes it was still hard to believe that --- that --- this young man --- before him was once the same sniveling, often cowardly brat that was always clinging to Kagome's skirts. But as the long years had worked to change him, they had inevitably changed Souta as well. Though still a bit on the sensitive side, there was now an easy confidence to the boy, an easy confidence that Inuyasha proudly felt he had played some role in developing. And, much like it was with Shippou and Miroku, over time Souta had grown closer to him, becoming like the brother he never had. _Correction_, Inuyasha added, a few of his thoughts still centered uncomfortably around Sesshoumaru, _make that the brother he WISHED he had_.

Straightening his rumpled clothes, he smirked as he stared into the boy's face. Even though those annoyingly round cheeks were long gone, Souta still had those same warm, brown eyes, and a small smattering of freckles remained to dot his cheekbones. He had the exact same uneven bangs, teasing grin and easy laugh as his sister. And, much like Kagome (well, before pregnancy, Inuyasha corrected with a silent laugh), the boy's frame was lean and tall. Really tall. In fact, adding insult to injury, the damn kid actually stood just a hair taller than he himself did now.

_Gods, he fucking hated looking up to anyone!_

Now that Inuyasha was vertical again, he promptly reached out to catch his unsuspecting rescuer in a vicious headlock, hoping to recover a small measure of what little remained of his dignity. His poor, ambushed captive clawed helplessly at his shoulders and punched at his ribs, cursing rather colorfully. Inuyasha's depraved smirk grew and his ears cocked forward in rapt attention. A few of the phrases Souta was spouting were rather imaginative, original --- and extremely wicked. _Make that downright filthy!_ he corrected, releasing a low whistle of admiration at one particularly vile insult. In fact, the hanyou decided, he might have to commit THAT new expression to memory to unleash on Kouga later.

Kagome rolled her eyes at the sight of her hapless brother struggling and sputtering against Inuyasha's tight grip, all to no avail. Really, she didn't have time for any of this foolishness now. _Why were boys so --- so weird?_ Wisely deciding to ponder the idiosyncrasies of the male psyche on another day, she left her poor brother at the half demon's mercy. Carefully picking her way through the scattered remains of the broken grandfather clock, she moved to stand before her flustered mother. "Mama," she demanded firmly, her stomach still in a knot from her initial scare. "What is going on! Why didn't you answer me when I called you? We were so worried! Just what's going on here!"

Her mother's expression brightened and quick as could be the woman turned, reaching behind the couch to pull forth an obnoxiously large present --- an obnoxiously large present wrapped with obnoxiously loud paper and adorned with an obnoxiously loud bow. "Why, Kagome --- don't you see? It's a baby shower!" she responded lightly, as if her answer was the most obvious thing in the world.

"A baby what! What the hell are you people going to do to my ---" Inuyasha interrupted, his pitch high, his tone filled with an equal mixture of horror, outrage and intense curiosity. "Wait, fuck --- owwww!" he snapped a moment later, sliding back to the floor again. In his confusion, he had loosened his hold on Souta, allowing the young man to accidentally land an unchecked kick to his groin.

Kagome winced and heaved a small sigh of sympathy. In truth, she was not sure who she felt more sorry for at the moment: the obviously agonized hanyou writhing on the carpet or the little brother who was more than likely about to have double the torment revisited upon himself once said hanyou recovered. Still unwilling to waste any time dwelling on the actions or immaturities of boys, she pursed her lips and fixed all of her attention squarely on her mother. "A baby shower --- right now!" she squeaked.

Mama inclined her head to the side and favored her with a soothing smile. "Why do you sound so upset, dear? I thought this would make you happy! Are you both alright? Did something happen back there? Back in the past?" As she waited for her daughter to reply to her many questions the woman shook the present in her hands, rattling its contents in attempt to further entice the girl.

But Kagome would not allow herself to be tempted so easily. She crossed her arms and tapped her toe to the floor in an impatient cadence. The past few days had been filled with so much strain, so much anxiety. There were so many unanswered questions. She felt like hell, and, as she brushed a lank strand of hair over her shoulders, she had a sneaking suspicion that she didn't look that much better. "Well, yes, thank you so much for all --- this --- but --- wait --- that's not the point," she stammered. "I mean --- a baby shower? The baby's not due for five months, and --- and how could you have even known we'd be home **right now**?"

"Right now?" Mama repeated hollowly, a small spark of panic appearing in her usually warm eyes. She looked shaken and distracted, and suddenly seemed way too interested in re-positioning the arrangement of dried flowers that rested atop the television set.

Kagome gasped inwardly at her mother's actions, having used much similar tactics on Inuyasha when she didn't care to answer one of his demands. Her mother was obviously trying to distract her! Her mother obviously hiding something! "**Yes**, Mama! Right now!" she continued hotly, unable to escape the cold press of her returning doubts and fears. "How did you know we'd be here? Be here right this day, right this minute, right this second! And, YES, something bad happened in the past! We wouldn't even be here right now if it wasn't for --- oh, never mind! Mama, **DID** you know we were coming or is this all just a lucky guess!"

From his place at the doorway, Jii-chan suddenly released a loud, deliberate cough. The harsh noise seemed to have more of an effect on Mrs. Higarashi than any of her daughter's impatient questions, for in that instant the woman suddenly relaxed, seeming to return to her old self again. She giggled easily and she strode forward to press the present she carried into Kagome's hands.

Kagome accepted the offering with a grateful grin, but her body language remained tense. Even as she tore into the present, she kept herself on guard, still feeling so awfully skeptical. Much of her thoughts were still centered on the trials that awaited her back in the past and she felt --- so --- so drained. At that moment, as if sensing her need, her mother reached out and pulled her close, dragging her into a tight, and very, very welcome hug. "Mama, it's been ages --- just however DID you know I'd be here?" the miko repeated, her stubborn will demanding that she make one last attempt to draw out the truth even as her tired eyes fluttered closed.

"Ohh, I don't know!" the woman whispered into her ear as she soothed her dark hair back from her forehead. "Call it Mother's intuition --- _maybe_."

From his place back on the floor, Inuyasha watched the quiet exchange with a wary eye, the strangeness of it all causing him to forget his temporary pain and his need to even the score with Souta. Kagome's mother did not seem to be herself at all, and, for a moment, the look of misery that passed over her face as she held her daughter was so raw, so intense that it marred her beauty. _Now what the hell is going on? _he wondered. The half-demon scratched at his ear, feeling torn into every different direction at once. He looked away from the two women, his thoughts lost and jumbled in far too many intrigues to keep track of anymore.

_First Kikyou wanted him dead! And --- and --- now he was being forced travel with the obnoxiously arrogant yase ookami! On top of it all, he was going to be a father!_

_And --- and Naraku had just re-emerged to try and ruin it all, strolling out of whatever greasy hole he had walled himself into for the past few months! And there was a missing Kohaku to find! Correction, a missing Kohaku to find, catch and slap till his senses returned!_

_And, most disturbing of all, Kagome was keeping little secrets from him, and her powers seemed so spotty and unpredictable --- and, damn it, she was barely eating! These days even he had to admit she sure didn't look all that healthy!_

_And --- finally--- now his enemies seemed ready to challenge Sesshoumaru one more time, seeming about to commit the gravest of insults by actually marching right towards the borders of his lands, and who the hell knew WHY?_ Whatever the reason or result, nothing good ever came of Naraku getting tangled with Sesshoumaru. In fact, in the past such plots and schemes usually only served to piss the already insufferable taiyoukai off, only causing the stuck-up son-of-a-bitch to blame ALL interference out on **HIM**, and not the real culprit! And now here he was, unable to do anything about, well --- anything --- stuck in an outlandish future, a future where Kagome's family was currently behaving even more bizarrely than usual!

_Truly_, Inuyasha thought, he was fucking cursed. Rolling his eyes, he picked himself up off the carpet and marched across the room, straining to draw the Tetsusaiga from the skewered mantle without causing any further damage to the living room wall.

* * *

It had taken some coaxing, but Mrs. Higarashi had finally managed to convince her wayward guests to prolong their visit and stay for dinner.

Now she raced to pour more batter into a skillet, and while the okonomiyaki curled brown at the edges, she burned her hand. She ignored the injury, and merely popped her fingers into her mouth as she hauled a pot of steamed broccoli off of the stove. She carried the vegetables to the table and then up-ended them into a bowl, hurrying back to the range to salvage the rest of her now 'extra-crispy' meal.

"Mama, can I help you?" Kagome asked trying to keep up with the woman's harried pace. She still couldn't figure out what was making her mother so agitated, so scatterbrained. She had the distinct impression Mama wasn't paying attention to ANY of the dishes currently being charred to black ash on the stove-top. In fact, it looked like her mother was merely directing all of her focus into sneaking peaks at HER --- again! Kagome frowned, completely baffled. Yes, she wasn't imagining things. Every single time she had glanced up while un-wrapping her wonderful presents, she couldn't help but notice that the woman had been watching her. Mama's gaze had been hovering heavily over both her and Inuyasha, as if she were closely studying them ---

And --- and her eyes had been damp and miserable, her expression far-away.

"M-mama?"

Mrs. Higarashi had nearly tripped in surprise at hearing her daughter's voice. "No, sweetheart, I can manage. You just relax and enjoy yourself!" She looked around for something to occupy Kagome while she finished preparing the meal. She immediately searched for Souta, thinking to put him on charge of entertaining his sister, but, as usual, the boy had run off with his 'Inu no nii-chan'.

Mrs. Higarashi sighed in resignation. More than likely Souta was showing the half-demon his new car. She suppressed a small shudder, remembering how many of her daughter's bicycles Inuyasha had somehow managed to destroy. She couldn't imagine what he could do to an automobile. Though Souta's car was especially old and clunky, purchased lovingly with every last dime from a summer job, she still could imagine that the half-demon could most certainly find some creative ways to add a few more dents to the hood.

"Mama?" Kagome prodded again, snapping the woman out of her musings. "Are you sure I can't help you?"

"Oh, ummm, if you really want to help, I suppose you can set the table, dear." Mrs. Higarashi waved absently at the drawers and turned back to the food that was now smoldering on the skillet.

Kagome pursed her lips in frustration but obediently moved to carry an assortment of serving ware to the table. Her mother was being so – **so bizarre**. A quick glance over her shoulder revealed that the woman was now opening and closing the sliding doors, fanning her white apron, and letting the fierce winter wind gust throughout the room, blowing the napkins she had so carefully laid out to the floor.

A small muscle in the miko's temple twitched against her every effort to control it. "Mama," she asked slowly. "I know I haven't been home for awhile but isn't it customary to --- ummm --- CLOSE the kitchen door when the weather is this --- ummm, unpleasant?"

"Ahhhhhh, its all part of my strategy!" the woman giggled, casting a mischievous look over her shoulder. "It IS the best way to get HIM to the table, after all!"

Kagome sulked at first, wondering if her mother was having a bit of fun at her expense. But she understood completely when Inuyasha appeared at the doorway a mere second later, looking over the table to stare pointedly at the oven. Though he tried his best to appear nonchalant, his twitching nose and wide, longing eyes gave him away ---

"Steak? Did you --- did you cook me a steak?" he asked hopefully, his expression fixed and pleading and downright --- adorable. A look of unbridled ecstasy passed over his features as Mama nodded in sly confirmation.

Kagome couldn't keep from laughing and shook her head at her mate's distinctively canine sensibilities. She imagined that if he possessed a tail it would be wagging ferociously right now. Moving to the table, she took her seat at her usual place just as Souta came through the door. The young miko couldn't help but notice that her brother was currently flashing one of those goofy grins all men seemed to wear when they've been bragging about a fabulous new toy or possession. _Well_, she amended slyly, the same goofy grin men wear either when they've been bragging about a fabulous new possession OR after they'd been WELL pleased by a woman.

_Arghhhh, men!_ she laughed to herself as she pushed a bowl of edamame (snowpeas) away from her plate. And, not too mention --- _Arghhhh! All these stupid foods, all these overpowering scents! _They were wrecking havoc on her poor stomach!

But she didn't have long to dwell on her aching belly, for at that moment, Souta passed behind her chair, reaching out with a careless hand to mess her bangs. Already on the edge, her nerves close to abandoning her for good, Kagome released a rather impressive growl and tried to arch out of his touch. She wasn't fast enough though, and as her hair was teased into a spiky riot, she found she could do nothing but wish for the long ago days when Souta hadn't been tall enough or strong enough to inflict such torture upon her. _**Arghhh, men!**_ she repeated in her mind again, sagging in defeat. _Men and the joys of little brothers who weren't quite so little anymore!_

Souta seemed to reading her very thoughts for he cast her wicked smile that clearly invited her to bring on a sibling brawl. For a moment, Kagome forgot her exhaustion and her nausea, and her eyes sparkled in obvious challenge. But just as she prepared to thrust a slim ankle out from under the table to trip him, her insides seemed to twist, her strength falling sharply away. She gasped, drawing her leg back quickly, and curled down into her chair with a small noise of shock. For a long, tense moment she fought to keep from getting even more nervous, most certainly not needing Inuyasha to notice her discomfort! After all, he had so much to worry about already! And this was really nothing to get excited over! _Maybe---_ maybe she had just pushed herself too hard over the past few days! Taking in slow, steadying breaths, she massaged tiny circles into her temple with the pads of her fingertips, and waited patiently till all of the odd feelings left her. Within moments she felt just like her old self again, and sighed in relief. She straightened, glancing up just in time to catch Souta as he flashed her a smug smirk of victory.

Now it was time to share a triumphant smirk of her own.

Clearly, she HAD succeeded with her little ruse --- she HAD kept her feelings well hidden, for all her brother could see now was that he had somehow managed to escape his 'big' sister's wrath. And --- more importantly than that, she realized happily, she had managed to keep from alerting Inuyasha to her distress as well. After all, the hanyou was still standing guard over the oven, watching his steak sizzle as if hypnotized, and not racing to her side in blind, screaming panic.

Inuyasha quickly turned away from the tempting sights and scents coming from the stove, certain he had sensed an abrupt spike in Kagome's heart-rate. He fixed the girl with a shrewd gaze, searching for signs of anything out of the ordinary. But the miko appeared just fine; her eyes were amused and bright, and a contented smile was painted on her pink lips. For a moment, he couldn't help but wonder if he was finally starting to crack after all these years. Still, he just couldn't shake his underlying feeling of dread, that he was missing something --- something huge. Surely, Kikyou _couldn't _have been right ---

In spite of his worries, Inuyasha smiled as he watched Souta continue to tease Kagome, taking in their exchange with a curious sort of amusement. He immediately wondered what it would be like if he dared such carelessly playful actions with his own brother. The half-demon cringed instinctively, shoulders bowing inward, another chill streaking down his spine. More than likely anyone stupid enough to drag so much as a pinkie finger across Sesshoumaru's perfect locks would suffer the gruesome fate of being beaten to death with one of their own dismembered arms. He could picture it now ---

Luckily, a round of Souta's noisy laughter snapped him away from the rather bloody image that was currently half-formed in his head. Inuyasha shrugged and moved to take the chair on Kagome's left, reaching down to capture an unsuspecting Buyo. He flipped the yowling, old cat upside down and pulled him comfortably into his lap.

Even though the mood had gotten a bit lighter, Kagome couldn't remember a time when her family was this quiet at the table. Mama hurried to serve everyone, finally placing one large, VERY rare steak in front of Inuyasha. The miko watched his as eyes expanded till they seemed very nearly the same size as the plate that his meal was resting upon. Alright, so it appeared her hanyou could be bought for a price, but she remained unconvinced. She knew her family and she still thought that something fishy was going on! Her speculations ceased abruptly as her mother swept several outrageously large spoonfuls of rice onto her plate. And it didn't stop there! Somehow, in the next few moments, monstrous portions of every dish featured on the table were ladled out before her, with no end in sight. And she could do nothing to protest. She could do nothing at all, in fact, but bow her head, grit her teeth and attempt to breathe through her mouth. Slowly.

This time, Kagome realized with dismay, there was no fooling Inuyasha --- he was too close to her now and his steak was already mostly devoured, shredded right down to the bone. With nothing left to distract him, he picked up on her distress on the spot, and fixed her with a cold, probing look.

"What's wrong, Kagome?" her mother asked suddenly, honing in on her discomfort almost as fast as the demon did. "I've tried to fix your favorite foods? Is everything alright? Can I make you anything else?"

"I guess I'm not very hungry just yet," Kagome mumbled softly, poking her chopsticks into the fluffy mountain of rice on her plate, wondering if she could sneak some back into the serving bowl when no one was looking. "I have the distinct impression my appetite will suffer as long as this little one takes up residence here!" She gave her wide belly a fond pat. "Don't worry --- I'll come down and raid the fridge later tonight!"

Inuyasha's quick, side-long glance was almost as deadly as a dagger. "No, Kagome, you'll eat now --- there won't be a 'later tonight'! We have to leave here as soon as possible!" Without another word, he scooped up another a helping of rice, and doled it onto her plate. Kagome felt her stomach drop again and stared at her dish in numb amazement, quite unable to meet his eyes. "Not only will you eat now, but you'll finish every single thing here!" the half-demon added, his domineering tone making her feel even more nauseous than ever.

Kagome groaned aloud. She knew what was coming. She'd heard this same little speech countless times before. The faces of the people giving the lecture might change but the words and message were always the same --- _**EAT!** Ohhh, like she wasn't trying!_

As her mate and her family launched into a scathing sermon about her general health, the miko withdrew into her own thoughts, wondering what could possibly be wrong. One thing was for sure, the little thing inside her seemed to be just as picky and stubborn and OBNOXIOUS as his or her father! These days nothing in her stomach seemed to want to remain there for very long. _It wasn't fair!_ She was starving, but the prospect of choking down an actual meal made her want to retch; she was so weary but there was no time to sleep; she was so frightened, but there were too many things to focus her fears upon; she was supposed to locate the stupid Shikon no Tama, but these days her senses were so scattered she feared the only way she'd be able to notice the jewel's presence was if Naraku lobbed it at her head; she was just ---

"Everyone seems so anxious to remind me about what I already know!' Kagome shouted, nearly exploding up from her chair. "What do you think! Do you think I **want **this child to be unhealthy!" The miko cringed and clamped a trembling hand to her lips, ending her hysterical outburst just as swiftly as she'd started it. She didn't need to look up. She could already FEEL the startled expressions of hurt that were displayed on everyone's faces, and she was so mortified by her own behavior that she simply wanted to race from the room and cry. How could she raise her voice in anger --- especially after all of the thoughtful things her family had done for her on this night?

Kagome cleared her throat and quickly sat back down. Even to her own ears her words had so sounded petulant, so selfish and immature. She waited for Inuyasha to begin a furious rant of his own or for Jii-chan to insist she leave the table as if she were still a child. _Gods_, she sure was acting like a child! To her great surprise, no one in her family said anything at all. They simply nodded and exchanged knowing glances with one another, continuing on with their meals as if nothing had happened. Kagome tried to look to Inuyasha then, certain that at least HE would be fed up with her actions, but she quickly found he was no longer at her side. She blinked in confusion, finding that the half-demon had slipped over to the sink and was currently running a small kitchen towel under the tap. His eyes met hers briefly and then he hurried back to the table to press the cool, damp cloth to her temple, his free hand sweeping over her spine in a soothing caress. Kagome sighed, his tender gesture leaving her both grateful and surprised. Obediently, she brought her chopsticks to her white lips and all that was left of her irritation fled, to be replaced instead by reluctant acceptance. She chewed slowly and deep inside her, felt the baby lurch painfully against her diaphragm. _Spirited little thing!_ she commented in her mind. _Using Momma's spine as a springboard, are we?_ At that silent question the infant only leapt again, and Kagome could clearly feel the kicking of two tiny feet --- two tiny feet that seemed to enjoy practicing acrobatics against her rib cage. She fought to swallow a mouthful without wincing.

"I'm **so **sorry," she whispered, her words directed to no one in particular. She decided to alternate her apology between gulps, hurriedly wolfing down as much food as she could before any strange pains returned. "I'm t-trying. It's just that --- lately ---" The priestess sighed again, wishing she could explain everything she was thinking and feeling.

"You don't have to say anything, Kagome," her mother replied, reaching out to grab her hand tightly. "We just worry ---"

"Yeah, take it easy, Kagome," Inuyasha echoed, dragging her dull hair over her shoulder and away from her face. "Just relax. In fact, don't worry about anything. I guess --- I guess we will stay here tonight after all. We've been running for a week here." At the hanyou's unexpected announcement, Mrs. Higarashi suddenly looked up, seeming so relieved. She turned away once again to slant what she thought was a secretive glance at Jii-chan.

But Kagome caught the look and blinked in confusion, now certain that her mother and grandfather were definitely --- plotting --- something. She paused in mid-bite of a mouthful of vegetables, groaning aloud. "But we need to get back," she argued. "And as quickly as we can!"

"Keh. You've never been in a hurry to find the jewel before, so what's your rush now, priestess?" Inuyasha teased, his tone overly light. "I mean, Miroku and Sango will be spending the night at the temple. We wouldn't even begin tracking until the morning anyway."

"Please, Inuyasha! I feel better already!" Kagome pleaded rather unconvincingly. "We can't just relax here! What about poor Kohaku! He's got a huge lead on us!"

Inuyasha bowed his silvery head. "It's not that I don't care about what happens to the kid, but it's just --- this means more. A **lot** more," he explained softly, pressing a clawed hand firmly to her belly.

"Baka! I don't believe what I'm hearing! You KNOW we can't stay here," Kagome returned, her teasing statement made with sufficient kindness and sincerity to douse the quick beat of annoyance that sprinted through him at her continued resistance. "Inuyasha, you can't stay here tonight, and then figure out what Kohaku's up to and then get back here in time before the New ---" she trailed off, clearly wanting to speak of his monthly curse as little as possible. Her tone was abrupt now, not in a rude sense, but with the fear of having to watch him go through another night in his human form. Another night when he would be mortal and very vulnerable to Naraku's power and malice.

"The New Moon," Inuyasha finished for her in a sad whisper, already knowing the full scope of her worries. "Kagome, believe me, I NEVER lose track of the night of the New Moon. I know what I need to do. And I know how much time I have ---"

All the while, Mama watched the tender exchange, thoughtfully stroking her chin. "Of course, you'll stay here," she interrupted, her statement made more forceful by the accompanying quick wave of her hand. "At least for the night. Besides, Kagome, your friends --- they need time alone with their own little one, and you two need time, too. Who knows when you'll get a chance to rest again?" Before the young priestess could dismiss her mother's logical argument the woman quickly continued, "You'll need to gather your strength, Kagome. You too, Inuyasha. You look very worn out, my boy, so tired ---"

And that was it.

In that moment Mrs. Higarashi knew she'd won. After all, her daughter was absolutely selfless, giving to a fault when it came to the hanyou. She was always putting his comfort and safety above her own. If the girl thought Inuyasha needed the rest, of course she would instantly agree to stay.

And, at the very same moment, Kagome **knew **she had been soundly defeated. She had the distinct feeling she **WAS** being expertly manipulated and tried to come up with one final objection, but still she hesitated so long that her mother was leapt back into the breach to shut off further debate with the cruelest, most unfair parting shot of all ---

"Who wants cake!" Mama suddenly sang out. Once again, Inuyasha's eyes widened to comical proportions and his hand shot into the air like an over-enthusiastic child in a lesson.

Mrs. Higarashi waited, maintaining her enthusiastic grin. But inwardly, she held her breath, fearful to hope, studying the considering expression in Kagome's face. _Oh kami,_ she prayed earnestly, _please, please let them stay ---_

There was a long silence before the miko finally broke into a light grin.

Inuyasha, who was currently observing Kagome just as carefully as her own mother, watched as the girl's tired eyes warred between the intense need to know what was happening in the past and the desire for one night of peace. He knew in an instant which desire had emerged victorious ---

Kagome heaved an exaggerated sighed and leaned back into her chair. "Yeah, I guess it'll be good to stay away for one night." She quickly wagged a scolding finger under Inuyasha's nose, always wanting to have the last word. "But I'll say it again --- I'm REAL worried about Kohaku."

"Keh, we'll get him back," the hanyou snapped. "The only thing you should be worried about right now is Kouga! I don't even want to imagine what HE'S doing in our village right now! I sure hope Shippou's up to the task of keeping him out of trouble." Inuyasha's words and worries suddenly died out as Mrs. Higarashi suddenly stacked a large piece of cake on his plate.

The older woman laughed brightly at his reaction. "Stop arguing! You eat too, young man! You're still so skinny," she chided, pinching the demon's cheek before hurrying on to serve Souta.

Kagome's eyes narrowed in speculation. For some reason Mama's gesture did not seem as funny as it should. Instead it seemed rather --- forced. The woman's eyes were sad, brimming with memories as she stared down at the hanyou, as if she were memorizing every detail. But still Kagome made herself laugh because she knew her mother expected her to be amused.

"Not as skinny as your daughter, here. Give her some of that! Make HER eat at least something," Inuyasha bit out with a scowl, rubbing at the reddening mark on his face. "And, YES, Kagome, we won't be getting too comfortable --- we're leaving as soon as the sun rises! One night --- that's it!"

"You drive me insane, silly wan-chan," Kagome mumbled, giving his ear a playful tug. For all her rounded girth, she still managed to avoid his outstretched hand and the quick slap aimed at her backside. The hanyou sighed in mock exasperation and then returned his focus to his dessert.

The miko knew she would not be presented with a better chance for escape. "I'll be back in a minute," she lied, her tone full of friendly reassurance as she rose from the table. Truth-be-told she was completely exhausted, only wishing to collapse into bed, and had no intention of returning downstairs whatsoever.

Inuyasha merely snorted around his first mouthful of cake, not really hearing her.

As Kagome stole from the room, she cast one last look over her shoulder to search her mother's face. Mama's expression bore such a strong a resemblance to pure despair that it actually hurt to look upon her for too long.

She looked like --- like a stranger.

She looked tired. She looked old.

Frightened, Kagome turned and fled down the hall.

"Hey, isn't this supposed to be a party!" Ji-chan shouted, ignoring his granddaughter's rapid departure. He rapped his bony knuckles against the table loudly, forcing all the faces at the table to make the sudden shift towards him.

Almost against his will, Inuyasha smiled at the old man, grateful he had found a way to lighten the mood. Somehow, he thought, Kagome's grandfather was the kind of person that looked better when you weren't looking straight at them or examining them too closely. Even when the crazy old creature was young, the hanyou reflected, he couldn't have been what you would call handsome. In fact, Inuyasha thought, staring at a yellowed picture over on the now cracked mantle, Ji-chan had the pug-nosed kind of ugliness that a young man like him actually found impressive.

It was the same repulsive kind of impressive as getting fabulously dirty, or lifting a rock to find a particularly fat grub or snail, or getting fish slime on his fingers, or plunging his fist through the guts of a screaming demon opponent.

_Men stuff._

_Or maybe,_ he corrected, fidgeting with the hilt of Tetsusaiga, _maybe it was just DEMON men stuff?_

_Whatever._

Not caring to pursue the real answer, he simply returned to examining Jii-chan. Though the old man's figure was short, he was very wiry and rugged. His face was actually a lot like old Totosai's, all lined and pitted like a mucky riverbank. At nearly eighty, his hair was dull white and sparse, but somehow his eyebrows had remained black and horribly shaggy, like two fat caterpillars had landed upon his temples and decided to settle there. And on his chin there was a large brown mole from which --- the hanyou paused to count --- four, no **FIVE **hairs emerged, bristling forth as sharply as a porcupine's needles. And though Jii-chan's eyes were small and full of mock-disapproval, they were so bright and ageless none-the-less. Those eyes actually reminded Inuyasha of the eyes of a fledging owl he had once run across. It had been ages and ages ago, back in his boyhood. As he recalled, he had been only recently orphaned and was seeking out a cave in which to hide out the night. Just when he thought he had found the perfect spot in which to shelter himself, he discovered --- too late --- that it had already been occupied. The young bird had taken him by surprise, hopping out from the dark crevice, shrieking shrilly as it beat its half-feathered wings in his shocked face. Proud little thing, he mused with a genuine, grudging respect.

As he remembered now, he **HADN'T **been quite so proud. In fact, he had been so startled by the bird's sudden leap that he had screamed like a little girl and tumbled unceremoniously down the cliff into the river below. Inuyasha smiled ruefully. _Yeah_, maybe that particular memory was one he'd keep to himself. _But funny_, he scoffed, how some stupid thing like that would stick with him after all these years. Must be his far-too-full belly making him get all stupid and reflective.

He shook his head and resumed examining the old man. _**Damn!**_ Summer or winter it seemed Jii-chan was always wearing the same ugly old robes. That particular thought brought his inspection to a screeching halt once more and Inuyasha looked down at his own attire with a sheepish grin. Perhaps HE wasn't the best one to comment on a person's need to expand their wardrobe. But still --- the fire-rat haori was nothing like those musty, moth-eaten temple garments ---

His thoughts were interrupted again as Kagome's mother brushed past him._ Fuck_, that woman could never sit still! She was always moving about, working in the kitchen, or running out to the porch to shout for Souta. Then in a flash she would be disappearing through one door, only to dart back in through another. _Funny_, though --- he couldn't remember her ever looking this sad. In fact, tonight, Mrs. Higarashi actually reminded him a bit of his own mother, the beautiful lady Izayoi. With that one thought, he was suddenly glad he had ordered that they rest and spend the night. Something was definitely wrong here. Mrs. Higarashi was usually just like her daughter. Smiling, amused, beautiful, laughing happily as she raced about with her errands, just like his ---

Just like his --- _**Kagome**_! _**Wait!**_ Inuyasha realized with a scowl, _now just where the hell did SHE go anyway! Wait a minute! Didn't she say she was coming right back!_

* * *

Kagome made the slow climb up to her room, hands bracing the underside of her swollen belly. _Her fat, ugly, uncooperative belly! _she cursed mentally. With each heavy step she took she relieved herself of a few unfeminine words of profanity. They only made her feel better to a small extent.

_Easy, Kagome!_ she hastened to remind herself again. _It's a baby! Inuyasha's baby!_ That line of logic brought her sharply back to all she had achieved and experienced, and for a moment she thought nothing --- not even her excess weight --- could spoil her feeling of pride. But with that feeling of pride came a sudden pang of fear. Maybe she shouldn't boast that nothing could spoil her pride, after all there was still the missing Kikyou to worry about! And of course back in the past Kohaku was getting one hell of a head start now, too!

Kagome snagged a lethargic foot on the carpet at the top of the stairs. And, she added to the ever-growing list of problems --- _there was no denying it anymore_ --- as she definitely proved at the dinner table tonight, something was wrong most definitely wrong with HER. This pregnancy was taking its toll on her body, more so than she thought it would. She couldn't shake her queasiness and there was no damn doctor to she could consult with, no medical glossary of how to bring a little quarter youkai infant into the world! And --- and Naraku had obviously formed a new plan of attack! And Inuyasha kept mumbling over and over about Sesshoumaru! And --- and now her family was acting insane! Well, Jii-chan always acted insane, she amended with a quick shake of her head. But she could tell Mama was hiding something --- something else. Something more important then her own current lack of appetite was upsetting the woman!

Kagome paused, hearing Inuyasha's laughter as it echoed up the landing and smiled, loving how sweetly he was treating her tonight, loving how well he fit into her family. At that moment, the hanyou's deep, raucous laugh, to be replaced by the unmistakable sounds of him beginning another argument with Jii-chan. Bone-weary, Kagome decided to ignore the fray, and continued on to her door. She flicked on the light absently and flopped onto her frilly bed, tugging at the comforter in annoyance and punching an over-loved teddy bear to the floor.

_Really,_ she thought, as she snuggled deeply into the pink covers, even though she was almost never here, she should ask Mama to buy a new spread. Something more dignified and mature. Something with no polka-dots. After all, she wasn't some silly little teenager anymore. That thought caused Kagome to crane her head to glance up at her old bulletin board.

She groaned.

Sure enough, pinned to the board's fraying fabric were old high-school schedules, forgotten locker combinations, ribbons from choir concerts, out-dated calendars, and scattered photographs. She squinted for a closer look, staring at the pictures as the girl she had once been smiled back at her, just a shade of an easier time.

A time of promise.

Reluctantly, Kagome let her eyes wander over the rest of the pictures, having made this same mental journey several hundred, no several thousand, times over the years ---

To say the least, her teenage years were quite far from normal, and that phase of her budding womanhood was not exactly what one might call 'the norm'. It was not a time of trips to the mall or giggly makeovers. It was not a time of posters of teen idols plastered on the wall or overnighters at pop concerts. It was not a time of parties or young bodies straining in the backseats of cars. It was rather a time of demons and mystery and holy powers and battles and magical artifacts and --- **_love_**.

_Yes _--- she had been too busy falling into TRUE love to waste time with simple crushes and passing gossip in the hallway. The boys of her own era always seemed hopelessly immature and silly to her, and besides, Kagome giggled to herself, who among them had fierce golden eyes and silver hair? Back then, she recalled, whenever she'd return from the past, most of her social life would involve chasing down classmates in order to plead for their notes. She'd been forced to learn what she'd could when she could. She had been so naïve, and picked up little about sex and men in general, for the boys at school all thought she was desperately ill, or at the very least horribly contagious. And on those occasions when she didn't seem so sickly, they still thought her to be a bit strange and distracted, flighty and --- out of touch with reality.

Besides, most of them feared her crazy old grandfather too much to attempt any seduction, she reminded herself ruefully.

After squeaking through high school, she had tried to go off to college, but after a year of struggles and missed exams and term papers that had been half melted away by shouki, she had been forced to take a semester off. That semester off was quietly followed by another.

It was then that she'd had her first real sexual encounter ---

_Hojo._

Even now, her cheeks still burned at the memory and Kagome buried her face further into her pillow in embarrassment. On that long ago night, she had not succumbed to the boy's masculinity, nor his ever-present enthusiasm and kindness, but to her jealously after watching Inuyasha melt away into the forest with Kikyou late one night, arms entwined, lips less than a breath away from touching.

_Yep_, jealousy. A pure-hearted, virginal miko succumbing to bitter jealously. _Well_, she added ruefully, her jealously had been helped along by the aphrodisiac effects of three martinis, two large glasses of Asahi and several shots of some other burning liquor that she could not remember.

Luckily, they didn't get very far.

Just a few desperate and wild kisses, and then one warm and far too-soft hand, a hand that had never wielded a sword, fumbling under her bra. That hand was quickly joined by its mate, stroking and teasing and diving down past the buttons of her jeans, clever fingers ghosting along the lace trim of her panties. It was then, in the heat of his passion, that Hojo had erred, committing the gravest, most **terrible** of mistakes ---

He'd simply breathed her name.

And in that moment, there was no more pretending.

That voice wasn't the voice she had been wanting to hear. It wasn't the voice she'd been longing for. She recalled how violently she pushed poor Hojo back; she recalled his wounded expression and his look of dumb surprise. She remembered how she had choked a stammered apology as she speedily readjusted her clothing. And, of course, she could never forget how she had simply run away, sprinting faster perhaps than she even would have if a demon had been chasing at her heels!

Kagome's guilty blush grew. She never really did discover just how exactly Inuyasha had found out. Actually, she revised with a small pout, she** DID** have a pretty good idea. She and Sango had been sharing everything for years, all their hopes, all their girlish dreams and fantasies, and all of their frustrations when those fantasies were drawn-out against reality. Late one night, as they had relaxed together in an onsen, she had confessed the entire sordid incident to the taijiya.

Whatever.

It had seemed like the right thing to do at the time. After all, she had just questioned Sango about the strange purple marks on her neck and the girl had taken her completely off-guard, blurting out the fact that her relationship with Miroku had suddenly taken on a whole new, and much deeper, dimension. That night, Sango had her OWN confession to make, her brown eyes wide with a new understanding, her cheeks tinged a deep scarlet.

And not just from the heat of the spring ---

_Ah, well._ In return, she had spun her own tale back and, in light of their new intimacy, Sango had obviously passed the word along to the monk. Kagome cringed, not even wanting to picture the look that must have appeared on Inuyasha's face when he had eventually found out. She remembered that the hanyou had confronted her, trying to paint a tolerant smile on his face, but she could tell in an instant that he was having difficultly quelling his primal urge to storm into the future and murder her old school-mate.

"Did you ---" he had bellowed at her, his eyes frantic, wounded, enraged, and, above all --- regretful.

"No," she had sighed. She had tried to make a show of re-adjusting her back-pack, trying to do anything to avoid looking into his eyes. "What about YOU?" she hadn't been able to resist asking. "What about you and Kikyou?"

Inuyasha had looked away so quickly then, trying to keep from telling her the truth she already knew in her heart and never before or since had she **EVER** remembered feeling so wretched.

"I see," she'd hissed, so tired of all the games, so tired of the desperate longing and the weak hiding. "Well, did you enjoy it, Inuyasha? I sure hope you did. Funny --- I thought it was only us girls who mistake sex for love!"

Kagome found that her eyes had grown a bit damp just remembering those days. He'd growled so viciously at her then. Even now, she could still hear the sound so perfectly, for it had been that same frightening snarl, that same jagged rumble that he'd usually only reserved for Naraku or Sesshoumaru. Inuyasha had stormed in her wake, unwilling to drop it, unwilling to let her go. "And what about you?" he'd screamed, outraged and re-faced. "So you didn't let that --- that --- little --- you didn't let him fuck you but you let him --- I-I can't even say it! Self righteous bitch, what did you mistake **THAT** for?"

"I didn't mistake it for anything!" she'd laughed maniacally. "I just wanted to forget about the way I feel about you!" She'd raced back to the well then, and did not return to the Sengoku Jidai for several weeks. Actually, she'd only returned after she'd awoken one night to find him standing over her in the dark, his hands clenched so helplessly at his sides.

That was the night things started to change.

Wordlessly, she had turned back her covers, inviting him to share her bed. And wordlessly he had accepted her offer, stretching out beside her and holding her in the dark. He had pressed so many shy kisses against her temple and cheeks, but never to her mouth ---

_Yes,_ Kagome thought, reshuffling that particular memory back where it belonged --- back to the furthest hidden depths of her mind. Once there was a simple, ordinary girl, filled with simple, ordinary jealousies, and simple, ordinary plans on how life her life was supposed to turn out. Now there was only a powerful miko.

A powerful miko who would soon be a mother. Kagome smiled, allowing her eyes to travel over the useless items in her bedroom once more.

These mementos of her youth were nothing to her, she decided. Nothing at all. In fact, all she really saw now were faded photographs and dusty frames in need of cleaning.

At that moment, almost as if reading the reflective nature of her thoughts, Inuyasha appeared at the doorway and she breathed in a peaceful sigh. Her gentle smile widened as he turned off the light. The waning moon shone dimly though the faded pink curtains next to the bed, shading his long white hair with an eerie cast of blue. He removed the Tetsuaiga from the cord at his lean waist, turning to rest the battered sword against her old desk. _Gods,_ there was an ease in the way he carried himself now. He seemed so content, so relaxed here in the future. His golden eyes were on her, gleaming seductively in the dark, his intentions rather obvious. Her heart ached as she watched his hands tremble, loving him all the more for being as moved by the sight of her as she was at the mere sight of him. She watched quietly as he fumbled with the ties of his clothing before crawling into bed beside her. As she felt his lips trail kisses down her throat, she thought about the years, aching with memories of all the sweetness and sorrow that are the heritage of real, lasting love. _No,_ Kagome thought, as Inuyasha pulled her tightly against him, she could never really be sad. She could never be sorry she had traded the future for the past --- not at all.

* * *

It was quite late when Sesshoumaru finally decided to return to the shiro. All lay dark, save for a single lantern glowing weakly from within the thick walls of the main house. Just as he entered under the archway and finished closing the main gates behind him, something --- some flicker of movement at the opposite edge of the courtyard --- caught his gaze. Instinctively, he froze and waited, wondering if it was some trick of the starlight, or perhaps merely the ocean's reflection. His eyes dilated and, with the deadly accuracy of a natural predator, came to focus on a small, rather familiar shape slinking through the hedge rows.

**Rin.**

_What was she still doing out here?_

Sesshoumaru's heart pounded as he started forward silently, tracking his prey, following the girl's wavering shadow as she snuck towards the stables. _Alright_, he had originally intended to ignore her this night, to leave her to her foolish grief, but --- _what the hell was she doing awake at this hour? And where the hell did she think she was going?_

He froze again as the girl abruptly paused, tilting her face upwards to cast a very annoyed look up at the sky. He smiled in spite of himself, knowing that the little thing could barely see three feet in front of her face and was most definitely cursing the gloom. Rin was alone and lost in the dark, for the moon was gone, hidden beneath the ever present winter clouds.

And, in little over a week, he mused, there would come the night when the moon would fail to appear at all.

_The night of the New Moon._

A sharp noise and a quick curse distracted the taiyoukai, and he looked back just in time to see Rin stumble over a loose stone. Without thinking, he nearly lurched forward to help steady her, stopping himself as he remembered his original purpose with a jolt of disgust.

_Gods --- had he really been reduced to stalking the girl?_

_**NO**_, of course not, he reminded himself in a fierce rush. That would be beneath him. After all, he was only here to discover what she was up to --- nothing more. He would not interfere --- not unless absolutely necessary, of course.

Crouching lower and choosing to remain hidden, he left her to continue feeling her way blindly in the dark. Rin resumed her slow progress, inching along the wood timbered building, pausing again to take in a shaky, relieved breath when her fingers touched the frame of the wide doorway. Sesshoumaru suddenly wondered if she knew he was so close at hand.

_What if the girl was actually aware of his presence, and was simply ignoring him?_

His cheeks burned at the implications of the very idea. He felt another cursed set of emotions flutter through his mind, his chest, his every vein. And though these particular emotions were not exactly new to him, he had not felt them for a long, long time and he quickly realized they might have been as disturbing as love.

At this very moment, he felt indignant._ No,_ _wait --- he felt self-conscious. No, that wasn't it either._ His brow creased as he settled upon the right word to categorize his current state of mind. _**Ridiculous.**_ _Yes,_ that was it. He felt absolutely ridiculous.

Rin ducked into the barn, and peeked quickly out into the darkness one last time, wondering, indeed, if her Master was still following her. She would not have known of his presence at all if not for the new, small creak that now sounded out with every opening or closing of the outer gates. When Sesshoumaru had stormed into the shiro the other night, he had thrown those gates so wide they had nearly splintered, and she doubted ANYONE would ever slip past without the screeching accompaniment of strained hinges ever again.

But even though it was the broken gate that betrayed his presence, still she never knew Sesshoumaru to be so careless. It was just another fact that proved wasn't himself. Relax, she tried to reassure herself. _You have nothing to fear from him. He may not love you but --- but he --- won't hurt you. Think of how he could have been that night. You were so very, very disrespectful to him, but he --- he remained in control ---_

But it wasn't the threat of harm that was so worrisome, a small voice taunted from the farthest corner of her mind. It was something she couldn't even identify. It was the realization that she just didn't have a clue of what to expect, that there was no way for her to prepare for whatever new confrontation was steadily building ---

Sesshoumaru crept closer to the stable. _Why was SHE here so late at night anyway? Truly --- did she have any thoughts of leaving him? Perhaps he should send Aun away on some pointless mission, cleverly robbing her of any transportation?_ He knew he should deal with her now, but --- _but what if even face to face she had no wish to speak to him at all?_

_What has happened to your mind? Be reasonable!_ he counseled himself with a quickening breath as he stepped out of the shadows. _Do not let the impertinent little thing get away with anything!_

_Not again. **Never again**._

Rin tensed as she suddenly heard Sesshoumaru's slow, approaching footsteps and hurried to at least make herself appear busy. Whatever his current mood, hopefully petty revenge would not be on his mind tonight, she wished with a fervent sigh. In one last ditch effort to remain bold, she pinched at her pale cheeks, desperate to look alert and fresh, even though she felt on the verge on fainting away.

_**Forget everything!** Stay calm!_

And --- maybe, on this night, she could stay composed long enough to gather her explanation. Maybe she could learn his expectations and find relief from this pain eating away at her soul. Maybe it was all the same for him! Maybe answers and an easy truce would be the things he most desired as well. Maybe --- _oh, there were too many maybes._

Hurrying through the quiet stable, she caught Aun's reptilian eyes as the dragon snapped awake from his deep bed of straw. Offering a curious snort and swaying sleepily, the creature rose at once and shambled towards her, his twin muzzles sniffing at her hands and robes, eager to receive whatever treats she had brought. As quickly as possible, Rin brushed him back, nudging the sleepy dragon into the center aisle. She hobbled past him to grab a few grooming tools from the shelves, nearly tripping over a snoring Jaken in her haste, as the old toad lay nearly hidden, tucked under Aun's fine saddle skirt. She quickly readjusted the toad's makeshift blanket back over him, racing to begin her task ---

Sesshoumaru pushed past the wide doors and rounded the corner, surprised to find Rin just standing in the main aisle-way, humming, as she briskly rubbed Aun's withers with a damp cloth. In that one instant he **KNEW** that she had been aware he was following her: Rin was quick, efficient with her chores, and swift to act when given an order --- but only when there was need. She loved the stables, the gardens, the fields and the meadows, and she ALWAYS found ways and excuses to linger in those places. If she had thought she was truly alone on this night, she would still be greeting Aun, fussing over him, crooning about how strong and brave and good the creature was --- as if the formidable beast were a tiny lap-dog rather than a fierce demon! Inwardly, he laughed. It was perfectly clear to him now that she was purposefully trying to appear busy, merely acting and setting up a scene.

Sesshoumaru couldn't decide if that fact was something that should make him furious or --- or heart-achingly miserable.

Whatever the case, he chose to ignore his feelings, allowing a critical eye to wander over the young woman's form. Rin's hair was tied in a long braid that hung well past the small of her back, and she was once again dressed in a few more of his outgrown clothes. These robes, he noted, were not quite so fitted to her petite frame as the ones she had first selected. Her shape appeared lost, swallowed up by the many pleats and trailing folds, as if she was still blatantly choosing to hide her body from him ---

_Good._ Now he could begin to direct his shifting emotions. Sesshoumaru sniffed disdainfully at her clearly defiant choice of attire and for a moment, the crease of his brow grew a bit deeper in his building rage. In the next instant, however, he had collected himself and any evidence of his anger faded, his face once again smoothed into a haughty mask of neutrality

During the terrible silence, Rin studied her master from beneath her wispy bangs, wondering just how to act. Sesshoumaru was just standing there, remaining far too silent and still. Growing increasingly nervous by each ticking second that passed, the girl finally risked raising her eyes to his.

Her master stood no more than a few feet away and he was just staring at her with that typically blank and utterly unfathomable expression on his face. His far too handsome face, she amended ruefully, trying to ignore the sharp pains slicing through her chest. She couldn't detect any anger or malice in him --- actually, she could discern no real emotion at all. If anything, she'd say he looked bored. Rin's stomach tightened into a queasy knot.

It was the demon lord who broke the terrible quiet first. "Why have you come here at this hour?" he demanded in his most booming, authoritative tone. "Where are do you think you are going?"

"Going, my lord?" Rin asked, truly surprised. _Was he frightened by the thought that she might be running away? Did that thought worry him? _For the first time in days, she felt a faint stirring of hope. "Rin is not --- I'm not going anywhere. I --- I just couldn't sleep," she supplied truthfully, instinctively wanting to ease his doubts.

Rin suddenly realized what she was doing and frowned. Once again, she was seeking to comfort **HIM** while her own mind was lost in some turmoil! Her frown deepened into a scowl, her lips tightened and she ground her teeth together in frustration. In the next instant, a choice, rather bitter phrase that betrayed all of her nagging doubts was spit out in an icy hiss. "I didn't want to be cooped up in the house any more --- like another one of your possessions."

Though she tried to imitate his commanding tone and held her chin high, inwardly she cringed. _Did she really just say **THAT **to him! So much for finding 'peace and relief together'!_ Rin hurriedly turned her attention back to polishing Aun's scales, struggling to rein in all these opposing feelings that seemed to be seething against her every attempt to control them.

"Kono ore to kenka shiteiti muda da. I will not be drawn into another fight with you, girl," the taiyoukai rumbled out behind her, his voice seeming as empty and unfeeling as his expression.

"Fine," Rin replied slowly, rather relieved that he had not risen to her childish baiting. "Because on this night, it is hardly fighting that I have in mind at all, my lord." Sweat was beading on her brow and she ducked beneath Aun's long necks to groom his other flank. But she had already brushed him there, and she realized now that her own swift move was merely a way to put some distance between herself and her master again. _Gods, why did she have to be such a pathetic little coward?_

At that very same moment, her master was not thinking along similar lines. Sesshoumaru was temporarily lost in a pleasant memory, one dark eyebrow raised at the oblique, sensual nature of her first comment.

_On this night, it is hardly fighting I have in mind, my lord._

_Truly, what did she have in mind then?_

He knew her only too well though, and he realized that she was not really aware of the subtle promise held within her own words. But, most infuriatingly, even though he already knew that little statement was not meant as an invitation, it still was enough to send all thoughts from his head, scattering his carefully rehearsed explanations. For a few seconds, he found his logical arguments were gone, replaced with a few rather wicked images. He scowled, and promptly forced himself to forget the accidental innuendo as the girl began to readdress the real topic that weighed so heavily between them.

"I have thought long about my behavior the other night night, my lord," Rin stated in her soft, lilting tone, as she lowered her eyes from his unsettling gaze. "And --- and I have thought about all the things the miko said."

"**And?** I suppose you now expect me to hold my breath and await your brilliant conclusions?" he returned coldly, disguising his building tension under a razor edge of sarcasm. _Damn --- how the hell did this mere girl cause him to lose control like this!_

Rin stiffened, trying to ignore his rude comment. _Alright,_ she thought, _she had truly invited that remark --- after all, she had struck the first blow against him tonight. But --- but --- her mind protested, she had sought the solitude of the stables!_ She had come here alone, eager for a few chores to occupy her mind, eager to do anything to cause her to forget this whole nightmare! And Sesshoumaru had followed her! **HE** was forcing this confrontation and invading her peace! And now **HE** was going to punish her with harsh, scornful words! But as quickly as her resentful protests began to build within her own mind, she let them fade again. _Really --- she did deserve that. After all, hadn't she tried to hurt him that first night she had returned to the shiro just to prove to herself that she could?_

_Gods --- none of this made ANY sense._

Drawing in a deep breath, Rin tried to forget her all of her quick-blooming anger and fear. She tossed her grooming rag to the straw, squared her shoulders and took a measured step towards him. Slowly, she moved to stand at the Sesshoumaru's side, her hands trembling as she touched his arm to gather fistfuls of his haori in her hand.

_His dark haori,_ she mused.

He seemed to have returned to choosing bleak and somber colors to outfit himself, as if the shades were a perfect reflection of his current mood. In this quiet light, she couldn't really tell if the robe he was wearing a midnight-blue or true black, but --- _gods_, did it look so lovely against his white skin. As the dark silk glided like water beneath her fingers, she was suddenly painfully reminded of the night she had first really dared to cling to him. That night --- after she had interfered in his battle with Naraku --- that night when she had clung to his sleeve, pleading for acknowledgement. Pleading for his forgiveness.

Quiet unlike that occasion, this time, he did not wrench away. But though he did not flinch or force her back, he did not seem especially comfortable with her touch either. Rin sighed in frustration as he twisted his face from her ever so slightly, shifting so that she could no longer see his eyes. "I **need** to know what it is you want from me, Master," she finally willed herself to whisper, praying she could somehow touch his heart. "That's all. Please, my lord."

Sesshoumaru did not reply at first, choosing only to stare down at the girl's hands with a blank look. He watched her little fingers fluttering along the hem of his sleeve, and felt his level of irritation steadily rise.

_Just what the hell was she doing now?_

_What was she thinking?_

_She wasn't going to soothe him, or lull him into some state of tranquility as if he were Aun!_

_Fine_, he sulked inwardly, Rin wasn't running-off and his curiosity had been satisfied. He should go now --- go and leave her alone so this didn't turn into some mortifying spectacle like their encounter the night before. He growled and shrugged away from her touch, just wanting to return to the main house.

As her hands were abruptly torn away from him, Rin faltered for a brief moment. Sesshoumaru was leaving, marching away without so much as a backward glance! With a small noise of resentment at being so casually dismissed, she stumbled forward to boldly step into his path. But the demon lord merely continued on with his stately march, as if he took no notice of her presence at all.

For the barest second Rin wondered if he would walk right over her and send her sprawling across the wide stable aisle as if she were Jaken. She experienced a brief, ridiculous fantasy of having to scrub his large boot-prints off of her robes as she had seen the small toad do so, so many times in the past. Holding out her hands and squeezing her eyes tightly shut, she waited for the jarring impact ---

Sesshoumaru came to an instant halt when only a mere inch separated their bodies.

Rin cracked an eyelid in surprise, only to find her master staring down at her as if she were a particularly slimy new species of insect. She quickly looked away from his critical gaze, focusing her full attention on a bright, corded tassel hanging from his armor. "Master --- you said I'm not your pet," she quickly sought to remind him, still not trusting herself to look in his face. "Well, if I'm not a --- p-pet --- then why do you treat me as such?"

Sesshoumaru took in a fortifying breath, his head high and his back stiff. As he let his angry eyes bore down upon the obstinate girl, he felt a rush of resentment the likes of which he had never known since learning of the damn hanyou's birth!

_This little thing did not seem at all grateful for the countless sacrifices he had already made for her!_

Did she not realize all the ridicule and scorn from other demons he would face? But – but in truth, as he had already decided, their scrutiny would really mean nothing! He was above the judgments of other youkai, even the judgments of what remained of his kin!

_It was_ --- it was the uproar that she had caused within his own mind that was so difficult to bear.

_She had turned him into nothing more than a hypocrite!_

She had reversed his mind-set on the natural order of things, forcing him to redefine beliefs that he had long held as absolute truth! And still she wanted more!

_When would it end?_

He found could no longer keep silent.

"You are not a pet!" he growled. "But --- but you belong to me all the same! Have you forgotten! You draw breath because of **MY** power!"

Rin bit her lip. "Of course, I've never forgotten!" she argued, startled that he would ever think such a terrible thing about her. "I just thought things would be ---" The girl trailed off, completely baffled at how to proceed. _How could Sesshoumaru-sama NOT understand?_ Of course she was grateful to him, but --- but --- didn't he think she had at least had some pride in herself, too! She knew she was forever in his debt, and she had spent all of her days trying to repay him --- but --- she didn't just love him because she was obliged to! And shouldn't her love mean more to him because it was given freely, not because it was simply expected? Didn't he think her love was something precious or worthwhile?

_Wait _--- didn't he think that SHE was something precious and worthwhile?

Rin shook her head sadly, her bound hair feeling so heavy and stiff against her neck. She thought quickly of Inuyasha and Kagome, their unquestioned bond to one another, the relationship they shared, and the way they constantly bickered. Like two little pups --- all yapping noise, flying fur and rolling fluff, but with true claws sheathed and fangs gentle. It suddenly occurred to her that those arguments weren't a sign of a weaker love. Kagome-sama and Inuyasha argued because they **COULD** --- because they had a strong enough connection to survive the fighting and move on. When their petty squabbles were over, their love was still there, stronger than before. They knew enough to value one another's opinions, even on the occasions when they differed. _But --- but how was she to make Sesshoumaru understand something like that?_

"I thought we would --- be like ---" Rin stammered, gesturing wildly with her hands, rushing to explain a million thoughts at once. "I thought we would --- Inu --- ya --- and Kagome-sama ---"

"I **know** what it is you thought," her master abruptly spat out, scattering her thoughts and words. "I know what you wished for --- perhaps this Sesshoumaru should have explained sooner, but --- there is nothing more I can say. There is nothing I can change."

"Why are you like this?" Rin murmured, finally tilting her chin up to stare at him as if she'd never laid eyes on him before. "**WHO** are you?"

Sesshoumaru straightened, and his expression seemed to become harder and less forgiving, as if he was deliberately trying to shut out her words and the past. "A taiyoukai --- a great demon lord, the first son of the Inu no Taisho, true heir to all his power," he countered after a moment's pause. His eyes gleamed as he brought up a pale hand, staring at his sharp claws as if truly fascinated. "Unquestioned master of these lands and quite soon many, many, many more." He offered an evasive shrug as if those statements alone should explain the rest. But to a devastated human girl it explained nothing and Rin felt her heart die a bit more.

As the cold silence expanded, Aun shifted his legs and whined pitifully, looking back and forth from the scowling youkai to his small trembling mistress in growing apprehension. Jaken's snores had stopped altogether. The toad had obviously awoken and was listening intently now, hardly daring to draw breath, anxious to know how this tense little exchange would end --- after all, his very future depended on the outcome.

Without another word, Rin turned, pausing to compulsively straighten Aun's tangled bridle on its hook. She then offered the restless dragon a small smile and a loving pat. To the cringing Jaken she offered a tiny salute. To Sesshoumaru she offered a respectful, yet wholly impersonal bow --- the kind of bow any lowly servant would grant to its master. She quickly hurried away before any tears would betray her.

Keeping his distance, the demon slowly followed the girl all the way back to her rooms. As the screen to her chamber clamped shut with a loud snap, he suddenly realized that he was facing yet another lonely night where he would be denied the gentle comfort of holding her in his arms. For a long time, he simply waited quietly outside her door, listening as she undressed for bed. It was not lust or any longing for her body that caused him to linger there, but rather the fierce need to guard against certain noises in the night. Certain noises in the night that would indicate she was planning to return to the stables and sneak away, to melt into the darkness and leave him forever.

* * *

**Like I said, this will be edited a bit. I'm just needed to slap it out there before I lost it. Thank you to the people who have been patiently waiting. I know this wasn't worth it, with all the mistakes and all, so please feel free to e-mail me with typos!**


End file.
